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',••'. ..    -,-'•    '     ^ '.  ,',          ' '   •     I 


Hee  !  Papa  i«  coming  ;  behold  that  bright  eye; 
II  anna  were  but  winj-a  how  swiftly  th«-y'd  fly  ' 


MARRIAGE  AND  HOME; 

— OR, — 

PROPOSAL   ANB    ESPOUSAL, 


A     CHRISTIAN     TREATISE 

ON   THE 

MOST  SACRED  REL/TIONS  TO  MORTALS  KNOWN 


MARRIAGE 
HOME 

YOUTH,  BACHELORS,  LOVERS,   HUSBANDS,   WIVES 
PARENTS   AND  CHILDREN. 


A  GUIDE  TO   OCR  SONS  AND   DAUGHTERS 

A     COUNSELLOR     TO     PARENTS. 


COMPILED  AND  WRITTEN 

BY     A     CLERGYMAN. 


BRADLEY,  GARRETSON  &  CO., 

BRANTFORD,  ONT.,  PORT  ADELAIDE  AND  MELBOURNE,  AUSTRALIA 

1888. 


Lntered  according  to  Act  of  Parliament  of  Canada,  in  the  year  one 

thousand,  eight  hundred  and  eighty-eight,  by  T.  S.Linscott, 

in  the  office  of  the  Minister  of  Agriculture. 


Pratt  of  Watt  &  Stonston.  Brantford. 


r-  P 


COPYRIGHT,  1886. 


("Publishers'      (preface. 


HE  publication  of  a  book  on  this  subject  has  been  con 
templated  for  years,  and  the  present  volume  is  now 
completed,  and  offered  to  the  public  with  the  same 
hopes  and  motives  of  which  the  conception  was  born 
,f.^  —that  the  book  will  have  a  large  sale,  be  read  by  thousands 
r$p  who  contemplate  the  marriage  relation,  as  well  as  those 
who  have  consummated  it  ;  that  its  mission  will  be  to  do  good,  to 
furnish  entertainment,  to  give  instruction  upon  a  subject  not  often 
attempted  in  books  ;  in  short,  to  enthrone  in  the  hearts  of  its  readers 
a  proper  respect  and  reverence  for  the  holiest  relations  of  human 
beings,  the  relations  suggested  by  the  words,  love,  courtship  and 
marriage. 

The  natural  relation  of  young  men  and  women  embraced  in  the 
term  courtship,  it  is  feared,  is  more  often  thought  and  spoken  of 
with  feelings  of  mirth  and  jest,  than  otherwise.  How  often  has 
the  unmarried  reader  heard  this  subject  discussed  with  seriousness? 
How  often  read  in  our  current  literature  good  and  wholesome  advice 
on  the  subject,  or,  for  that  matter,  an  attempt  at  it  ?  Has  he  ever 
heard  a  sermon  on  this  theme  from  his  pastor,  or  has  the  good  man 
ever  dared  to  speak  of  it  in  his  pastoral  visitations  ?  He  has  in 
quired  about  your  health,  your  spiritual  welfare  and  worldly  pros- 


Vi  PREPACK. 

pcrity  ;  but  the  subject  which  occupies  most  of  your  thoughts,  and 
which  more  nearly  concerns  your  present  and  future  happiness  than 
any  other,  he  does  not  touch  ;  and,  if  he  does,  he  has  unusual  cour 
age  and  wisdom.  Parents,  as  a  rule,  do  not  attempt  to  give  advice 
to  their  marriageable  children  on  this  subject  until  it  is  too  late, 
and  if  one  has  the  temerity  to  ask  advice,  he  is  often  laughed  at 
or  snubbed. 

What  books  are  there  on  our  centre  tables,  or  in  our  libraries, 
to  which  the  young  may  have  access,  wherein  they  may  get  solid 
and  pure  counsel  to  regulate  the  emotions  that  find  a  place  in  the 
hearts  of  all  who  arc  worthy  to  be  called  human  ?  "  Love  is  blind." 
it  is  said,  and  there  is  but  little  effort  made  to  get  off  the  bandages. 

Our  sons  and  daughters  receive  careful  instruction  and  training 
on  other  matters— we  do  not  leave  them  to  chance,  to  blind  nature, 
to  circumstances — why  should  we  do  so  in  a  matter  with  which 
their  destinies  arc  associated  ? 

There  arc  no  more  serious  or  holier  relations  than  lover,  wife 
mother  ;  or  lover,  husband,  father  ;  there  arc  no  relations  of  more 
practical  importance  to  the  Church  and  the  State,  and  we  insist  no 
one  of  them  is  a  subject  for  neglect,  much  less  of  jest  ;  but  on  the 
contrary,  should  be  regarded  by  young  and  old  with  the  profound- 
est  and  most  serious  of  feelings,  and  the  duties,  laws,  and  conditions 
of  each  state  should  be  persistently  studied. 

Why  should  it  provoke  a  smile  to  propose  the  establishment  of 
chairs  in  our  ladies  colleges  for  the  study  of  matrimony?  What 
lesson  of  more  practical  or  philosophical  importance  could  a  young 
man  study  in  the  university,  than  how  to  choose  a  wife,  and  how 
to  treat  her  afterwards  ?  What  study  could  possibly  have  a  greater 
fascination  for  young  men  and  women  than  the  study  of  the  phil 
osophy  of  love  ?  What  philosophy  presents  greater  difficulties  to 
be  mastered,  facts  to  be  explained,  or  problems  to  be  solved  ? 
Where  are  there  more  subtle  influences  to  be  fathomed,  or  complex 
laws  to  be  elucidated  ?  The  study  of  this  subject  would  surely 


PREFACE.  Vf! 

serve  the  double  purpose  to  the,  student  of  mental  gymnastics, 
giving  the  mind  a  vigorous  training,  enabling  it  to  grapple  with 
the  profoundest  of  subjects,  and  what  is  even  of  greater  importance, 
impart  knowledge  that  can  be  used  to  great  prnctical  purpose  in 
the  journey  of  life. 

Is  it  too  strong  to  state  that  a  man's  wise  or  foolish  love  will 
have  a  greater  effect  upon  his  career  than  anything  else  ?  We 
think  not,  and  therefore  firmly  believe  it  is  the  duty  of  parents, 
ministers,  and  all  other  educators,  to  impart  to  the  rising  generation 
as  much  knowledge  as  they  may  be  able  on  this  subject.  Many  a 
noble  life  has  been  blighted  through  ignorance  of  the  nature  of  this 
emotion,  that  might  have  been  saved  if  such  books  as  the  present 
volume  had  been  freely  circulated,  and  if  more  attention  had  been 
given  this  subject  by  those  who  have  the  training  of  our  boys  and 
girls. 

It  is  the  earnest  wish  of  the  publishers  that  this  book  will  to 
some  extent  accomplish  the  good  work  they  have  designed  for  it. 
and  yet  be  but  the  forerunner  of  other  books  on  this  same  theme 
that  shall  more  nearly  approach  their  ideal  than  this  volume  docs. 

Those  who  expect  to  find  in  these  pages  anything  to  minister  to 
prurient  tastes  will  be  mistaken.  The  writer  of  this  preface,  who 
is  a  father,  has  sought  to  furnish  such  a  book  as  he  would  wish  his 
own  sons  and  daughters  to  read,  and,  at  the  same  time,  a  book  to 
be  helpful  and  entertaining  to  parents. 

THE    PUBLISHERS. 


HAT  orator  was  pronounced  guilty  of  an  Hibernianism 
who,  on  rising  to  address  an  audience,  said,  "  I  will  say 
a  few  words  before  I  begin  ;"  he  being  only  second  in 
,-^~=^  proverbial  "bull-making"  to  him  who,  on  purchasing 
;~£  a  pair  of  new  boots,  and  finding  them  too  small,  declared,  as 
+&  he  threw  himself  back  in  his  chair,  "  I  shall  have  to  wear 
them  two  or  three  days  before  I  can  get  them  on."  Now,  we  are 
free  to  confess  that,  in  this  crisis  of  our  history,  we  are  in  sympathy 
with  both  these  individuals  ;  for  we,  too,  would  like  to  say  a  few 
words — explanatory,  if  not  apologetically — before  we  commence 
the  main  subject  of  this  somewhat  unique  and  adventurous  volume  ; 
and  also,  somehow  or  other,  test  the  public's  opinion  and  accept 
ance  of  the  same  before  it  is  offered  for  their  purchase — a  clear 
impossibility  !  We  certainly  walk  softly  at  this  juncture,  and  feel 
our  unexplored  way  as  delicately  as  did  the  gentlewoman  of  whom 
we  have  heard,  who,  being  reduced  in  circumstances,  and  driven  from 
a  state  of  affluence  to  the  stern  necessity  of  selling  lucifer  matches 
for  a  living,  pursued  her  humble  avocation  with  much  doubt  and 
misgiving,  and  after  every  fluttering  attempt  at  crying  her  petty 


::  PREFACE 

wares,  she  shrank  back  within  herself,  and  cowcringly  exclaimed  : 
"  Oh  !   I  hope  nobody  will  hear  me." 

Before  opening  our  "  contents  "  we  would  fain  bow  to  the  critics 
fwho  stand  without,  waiting  at  every  corner  of  literary  communi 
cation,  and  with  ubiquitous  and  argus-cyed  observation  keep  the 
scribal  world  in  awe),  and  inform  them  that  we  have  made  no  at 
tempt  at  being  profound.  Believing,  with  a  heathen  sage,  that 
"  wisdom  (of  a  certain  kind  at  least)  at  proper  times  is  well  forgot," 
we  have  written  with  great  plainness  of  speech.  "  All  truth  is 
simple,"  and  precept,  to  be  obeyed,  must,  like  prescription  or  direc 
tion,  be  written,  as  it  were,  "  on  tables,  that  he  may  run  that  readeth 
it,"  or,  as  we  sometime  misquote,  "that  he  who  runs  may  rcad,"- 
likc  one  that  passes  a  guide-post  or  mile-stone  in  his  course,  who 
can  at  a  glance  take  in  the  meaning  of  the  pronounced  inscription, 
even  without  slacking  his  running  speed  therefor. 

We  have  written  a  "  running  hand/'  if  we  may  venture  a  pun 
on  that  chirographical  phrase,  and  trust  that  we  have  not  left  our 
intent  obscure,  or  our  meaning  at  all  indistinct ;  but  have  striven  to 
profit  by  the  sage,  though  quaint  advice,  administered  early  in  our 
pupilage,  "  Make  your  ideas  to  stand  out  like  rabbit's  ears,  so  that 
the  hearers  may  get  hold  of  them." 

And  if  we  have  sometimes  just  for  variety's  sake,  turned  aside 
to  kindred  subjects — as  indicated  on  the  Title  Page — we  hope  that 
we  have  not  gone  wholly  astray,  nor  so  far  out  of  our  way,  as  to 
divert  the  mind  from  the  main  topics  of  discussion,  but  rather  have 
a:tcdthepart  of  the  preacher  Bramwell,  who,  according  to  one 
authority,  did  not  sufficiently  '  stick  to  his  text,"  and  was  charged 
with  wandering  from  his  subject.  "  Yes,"  said  another,  "  he  docs 
most  delightfully  wander — from  the  subject  to  the  heart" 
Our  wanderings,  which  we  confess  are  not  few,  are,  we  flatter  our- 
self,  after  the  same  benign  fashion. 

These  pages  attempt  to  mingle  the  instructive  with  the  enter 
taining,  and  the  entertaining  with  the  edifying,  and  herein  our 


PREFACE. 


thoughts  have  gone  up  and  down  —  now  Godward  and  now  man- 
ward,  now  in  the  direction  of  earthly  loves  and  now  in  that  of 
heavenly  or  divine  affections,  with  something  of  the  celerity,  if  not 
the  majesty  and  felicity,  of  Jacob's  visioned  angels  on  the  shining 
Bethel  ladder,  as  raptly  seen  by  the  heaven-dreaming  patriarch, 
"ascending  and  descending  on  it." 

We  are  informed  by  the  Apocrypha  that  the  manna  in  the 
wilderness  suited  itself  to  every  man's  taste  and  desire.  So  that, 
according  to  this  statement,  every  person  throughout  the  camp, 
irrespective  of  age,  sex  or  condition,  would  enjoy  not  only  a  profit 
able,  but  a  palatable  meal  We  cannot,  of  course,  expect  any  such 
miraculous  and  phenomenally-gratifying  results  to  attend  our 
attempt  at  furnishing  mental  or  moral  aliment  to  the  million,  but 
we  have  striven,  nevertheless,  to  provide  viands  of  all  sorts,  and 
from  every  clime,  to  satisfy,  if  possible,  each  legitimate  taste,  and 
to  nourish  and  strengthen  every  pure  and  holy  desire. 

And,  we  may  observe,  that  something  more  than  stale  joke  and 
piquant  current  jest  are  needed  on  the  great  and  grave  subjects  of 
"  Love,  Courtship  and  Marriage,"  and  of  man's  duty  with  regard  to 
the  same. 

The  region  of  the  heart  is  a  vital  one,  whether  considered  physi 
cally,  morally  or  spiritually,  and  to  tamper  with  human  affections 
in  the  infinitely  varied  and  sacred  relations  of  the  present  life,  is  to 
simply  play  the  part  of  Solomon's  madman,  who  "casts  firebrands, 
arrows  and  death,  and  then  says,  Am  not  I  in  sport  ?"  And,  alas  ! 
that  we  find  on  these  matters  men  are  everywhere  shunning  the 
right  way,  and  ((  walking  in  a  way  which  is  not  good."  God's  best 
earthly  gift  to  man,  and  the  greatest  paradise  treasure  even,  is  in 
many  cases  rigorously  ignored,  or  ruthlessly  and  positively  spurned 
as  a  thing  of  no  practical  benefit,  and  men,  growing  unmanly  in 
shirking  the  burden  of  domestic  responsibility,  are  leaving  one-fifth 
of  the  marriageable  fair  to  lead  a  lonesome  and  comparatively 
inutile,  unproductive  life,  as  they  lie  like  gloves  that  have  lost  their 


XII  PREFACE. 

mates,  on  the  shelf  of  non-appropriation.  Let  the  candid  and  gen 
erous  youth  of  our  hind  remember  that  no  man  liveth  to  himself, 
and  no  man  dieth  unto  himself.  One  single  life  compels  another 
of  the  like  kind,  somewhere.  Every  voluntary  celibate  means  also 
an  involuntary  one  of  the  opposite  sex.  All  unsupporting  men 
leave  an  equal  number  of  unsupported  women.  And  woman  was 
made  for  man,  and  not  for  herself;  she  being  but  a  "  help— meet  or 
fit— for  him."  She  is  the  weaker  vessel,  and  should  be  honored  by 
grateful  recognition  and  delightful  protection.  "  Two  are  better 
than  one"  to  fight  the  oattlcs  of  life— a  fact  proved  by  the  follow 
ing  striking,  yea,  startling  statistics,  which  we  earnestly  submit  to 
the  celibate's  perusal  :— 

44  According  to  M.  Lagneau,  the  well-known  statistician,  there 
is  a  lower  rate  of  mortality  among  bachelors  under  twenty-two 
years  of  age  than  among  married  men.  Above  that  age  the  con 
trary  is  observed,  and  married  men  live  longer  than  bachelors. 
Among  bachclcrs  38  per  1,000  arc  criminals,  among  married  men 
iS  per  1,000." 

Thus  it  will  be  seen  that  bachelors  outnumber  the  "  benedicts  " 
—so  called— by  over  two  to  one  in  our  prisons,  galleys  and  places 
of  penal  retribution.  Men  that  refuse  to  be  transported  by  the 
pleasures  of  a  wife,  and  love,  and  home,  arc  the  more  frequently 
transported  at  the  pleasure  of  the  State. 

And  yet  with  these  truths  before  us  we  find  that  such  is  the 
growing  aversion  to  matrimony  on  the  part  of  our  progressive 
youths  in  this  advancing  (?)  age,  that  no  less  than  two  millions  of 
celibates  are  found  in  France  alone,  and  that  the  French  legislature, 
to  encourage  matrimony  and  the  raising  of  large  families,  have 
adopted  a  law  which  provides  for  the  free  education  and  board  of 
every  fifth  child. 

Many  men  and  women  remain  unmarried,  not  because  the  op 
portunity  is  lacking  of  making  an  eligible  choice,  but,  rather, 


PREFACE.  Xlll 

because  the  "chances"  are  too  numerous,  and  the  commonness  of 
the  blessing  in  this,  as  in  many  other  things,   leads  to  its  rejection. 

Fable  tells  ot  a  certain  animal,  not  remarkable  for  its  sagacity, 
which  stood  hesitating  between  two  mounds  of  hay  until  it  starved 
to  death  ;  and  we  remember  the  story  of  a  somewhat  unpracticecl 
sportsman  taking  frequent  aim  at  a  flight  of  birds  without  ever 
discharging  his  gun,  and  excusing  his  strange  conduct  to  a  remon 
strating  friend  by  saying,  "  Why,  I  no  sooner  take  aim  at  one  than 
another  gets  in  its  place."  The  sapient  and  uncertain  celibate  can, 
of  course,  make  the  application. 

In  this  introduction  to  our  book,  we  would  introduce  the  un 
married  reader  to  Divine  Wisdom  herself,  who,  in  the  many-tongued 
Proverbs,  yearns  over  the  sons  of  men  with  more  than  motherly 
solicitude,  as  she  bids  them  to  be  wise  in  time,  to  make  early  pro 
vision  for  the  future  ;  to  trust  in  the  Lord  with  all  their  heart,  and 
lean  not  to  their  own  understanding  ;  to  drink  waters  out  of  their 
own  cistern,  and  running  waters  out  of  their  own  brook  ;  to  marry 
early,  or  in  other  words,  to  rejoice  with  the  wife  of  their  youth  ; 
and  also  urging  them  to  a  speedy  compliance,  and  pressing  them 
to  an  immediate  issue,  yea,  hastening  their  footsteps  (as  the  angel 
the  lingering  Lot's,  having  him  up  and  out  early,  even  before  sun 
rise,  and  laying  hold  upon  his  hand,  and  upon  the  hand  of  his  wife, 
and  upon  the  hands  of  his  two  daughters,  and  bringing  them  forth 
and  setting  them  without  the  city),  as  she  says  : — 

"  Go  thy  way,  eat  thy  bread  with  joy,  and  drink  thy  wine  with 
a  merry  heart ;  for  God  now  accepteth  thy   works.       Live  joyfully 
with  the  wife  whom  thou  lovest  all  the  days  of  the  life  of  thy  vanity 
which  he  hath  given  thee  under  the  sun,  for  that  is  thy  portion  in 
this  life,  and  in  thy  labor  which  thou  takest  under  the  sun." 
For  how  shall  a  young  man  cleanse  his  way, 
But  by  taking  heed,  as  the  Scriptures  say, 
To  the  Word  of  God,  which  will  guide  his  feet 
To  the  path  of  life,  "  Youth's  Guide  Complete." 


XIV  PREFACE. 

And,  now,  having  met  the  reader  thus  in  the  porch  of  the  Pre 
face,  and  given  him  the  clue  to  the  labyrinth  of  our  good  intent,  we 
would  kindly  invite  him  to  pass  into  the  house  and  make  himself 
at  home  ;  believing,  as  we  do,  that : 

The  preface  of  a  book  like  a  porch  should  be, 

Affording  ready  passage  to  a  dwelling  fair, 
The  author  being  the  porter,  who  benignantly 

Extends  to  all  a  welcome  who  would  enter  there. 

The  pages  turn,  like  leaves  of  folding  doors,  to  rooms 
Prepared  and  ready  furnished,  of  various  form  and  size  ; 

Or  like  gardens  giving  forth,  from  their   incense-breathing  blooms, 
Delectable  perfumery,  upwafting  to  the  skies. 

While  the  poems  are  the  bells,  which  with  many  changes  ring 
Responsive  at  your  pleasure,  whene'er  you  bid  them  play ; 

Or  like  minstrels  in  a  tower,  or  like  birds  that  blithely  sing, 
Where  fruitful  trees  rejoice,  or  glad  fountains  toss  their  spray. 

Their  golden  feet  glide  onward,  as  the  rhyming  measures  flow, 
Like  wings  that  twinkle  sunward,  or  like  doves  that  "  homing  "  go, 
While  the  Index  points  their  numbers,  and  the  head-lines  lead  the 

way  ; — 
But  ere  the  verse  encumbers  we  will,  brief,  conclude  our  lay. 

Yours  philanthropically, 

THE    AUTHOR. 


iSg 

^ 

l.jOVE — All  originally  from  God,  as  all  fire  from  the  sun- 
Love's  eyes — Coyness — Dreams — Vagaries — Love  and 
flowers — Roses — Lilies — Love  and  nightingales — Love 
{^     and  the  telephone — Love's  glamour — "  False  Lights  "- 

Love  and  Latin — Love  and  gifts — Love  and  knowledge 
—Pairing  season — Love  to  betrothed — Love's  young  dream — Died 
to  prove  his  love — Love  the  measure  of  the  man — Forbidden  love. 
BACHELORS. — Meaning  of  name — Increasing — Shall  they  be 
taxed — Taught  by  nature — The  bachelor  among  his  dumb  friends — 
Amiable — Wise — Beau — Celibates  and  Celibacy — The  ascetic  and 
apostolic  celibates — Celibates  for  Christ's  sake — Building  a  home- 
Homeless — John  Howard  Payne — Advantages  of  wedlock. 

MAIDENS  OR  SPINSTERS — Characteristic — Famous  —  Good 
daughters  make  the  best  wives — Disposing  of — Brown's  daughters 
and  matrimonial  methods. 

MATCH-MAKING — The  light  to  choose  by — Loving  equals- 
Marriage  a  lottery — Stylish  living — Marrying  for  love — A  friendly 
warning. 

PROPOSAL — Every  man  original  in  love-making — How  the 
Karenns  propose — The  Indians — Why  may  not  women  propose  ?— 
Embarassrnent  in  proposing. 


16  CONTENTS. 

BETROTHAL— Jewish — Grecian— Modern — By  lot — Coming  of 
age—Early  betrothal— In  England— France— Canada— Hindostan 
—Dispensed  with. 

ESPOUSAL— Human  -  -  Divine  -  -  Description  of  metaphoric 
bridegroom  and  bride— Christ  and  the  Church— Marriage  felicities- 
Wedded  oneness — Devotion — Woman  man's  best  helper — A  better 
half  bringing  better  quarters. 

THE  UNEQUAL  YOKE — Thistle  and  cedar — Vulture  and  dove- 
Birds,  beasts,  reptiles,  and  insects  avoiding  the  same — Mercy  and 
Mr.  Brisk— Forbidden  alike  by  both  law  and  gospel— Cainites  and 
Scthites— Cain's  wife— The  land  of  Nod— Cain's  mark— Unrequited 
affection— Indifference— Beauty  and  the  Beast— The  unhallowed 
yoke. 

RlN(;s— Origin,  design  and  use  thereof— Ring  money — Why  the 
ring  is  placed  on  the  fourth  finger — Spurious  engagement  rings. 

THE  WEDDING  SHOE — Of  ancient  and  modern  times. 
WEDDINGS — The  honeymoon — Husbands  and  wives — \Vrong 
beginnings  in  married  life — Driving  gently  over  the  stones — I  low 
wine  becomes  sour — Quarrels,  pleasant  and  foolish — The  marriage 
bond,  dowry  and  song — Nuptials,  meaning  thereof — The  wife  a 
sister — Half-sisters. 

MARRIAGE  CUSTOMS — Marriage  in  strange  places — Eccentric 
bridegrooms — Wedding    presents — Bridal  outfit — Presenting    hair 
at  marriage — Embroidered  hair — long  hair — Short  hair — Samson's. 
KISSING — Philosophy  of — Love's  kisses — Universal — Formal- 
Patriarchal — Ecclesiastical — Political. 

BEAUTY. —  Beauties —  English —  American — Rabbinical — Apcc- 
ryphal — Traditional — Scriptural — Use  of — Alluring. 
MARRIAGE  ETIQUETTE. 
(See  fourteen  page  Index   for  full  contents.) 


EGIN  we  this  Look  where  all  things  began — with  God  ; 
yea,  with  God  in  Christ,  who  is  our  beginning — "  the 
beginning  of  the  creation  of  God."       He  is  before  all 
things  (not  he  was  before  all  things,  but  he  is  before 
all  things),  and  by  him  all  things  consist. 

All  fire,  says  science,  came  originally  from  that  fount 
of  flame,  the  sun,  and  all  tends  upward  again  as  if  seeking  its  primal 
source.  Though  burning  at  second  hand  in  grosser  flame  from 
coal,  and  wood,  and  various  oils,  and  diverse  inflammable  sub 
stances,  where  it  is,  so  to  speak,  "  bottled  up  "  for  perpetual  use,  yet 
all  these  things  have  been  touched  with  the  solar  finger  and  made, 
primarily,  hot  from  that  central  source  of  heat,  the  orb  of  day- 
"  For  there  is  nothing  hid  from  the  heat  thereof." 

So  all  life  is,  directly  or  indirectly,  from  the  "fountain  of  life," 
and  all  pure  love  is  mediately  or  immediately  from  the  very  heart 
of  God.  Love  is  Jehovah's  only  passion  name,  and  twice  John 
mentions  it  in  one  chapter — "  God  is  love." 

It  is  the  voice  of  wisdom  in  the  Apocrypha — love  !  "  I  am  the 
mother  of  fair  love  and  fear  and  knowledge  and  holy  hope.  I 
therefore  being  eternal  am  given  to  all  my  children  which  are 
named  of  him,  i.  e.  chosen  of  him.  *  *  In  three 

things  I  was  beautiful  and  stood  up  beautiful  before  God  and  man, 
the  unity  of  brethren  ;  the  love  of  neighbors  ;  a  man  and  his  wife 
that  agree  together." 

*2  '  17 


|8  .  PROPOSAL  ANIJ   ESPOUSAL. 

Yea,  love  is  the  first  lesson  of  Wisdom's  school— the  very  spirit 
and  controlling  genius  of  her  divine  institutions.  "  1  love  them," 
she  says,  "  that  love  me,  and  they  that  seek  me  early  shall  find  me. 
All  them  that  hate  me  love  death." 

Blessed  school  of  the  heart  or  soul  where  love  is  the  principal 
thereof,  and  also  the  principal  thing  taught  therein  ! 

Ye  children  then  hasten  and  come  to  Christ's  school, 

Where  Wisdom  your  teacher  shall  be  ; 
Her  lessons  are  pleasant  and  kind  is  her  rule, 
"  1  love  them,"  she  saith,  "  that  love  me  " 

"Receive  my  instruction,"  she  cries,  "and  not  gold, 

Obey  my  commandments  and  live  ; 
My  precepts  shall  guide  you  in  youth,  and  when  old 
I  a  good  understanding  will  give." 

Her  "  house  "  is  before  you  ;  go,  knock  at  the  door, 

And  it  shall  be  opened  to  you  ; 
O,  wait  at  her  portals  and  wander  no  more, 

Her  counsels  are  faithful  and  true. 

If  we  can  only  persuade  men  to  love  aright  the  great  work  of 
life  is  accomplished.  Man  will  always  go  whither  his  love  directs, 
whether  rightly  or  wrongly,  be  it  observed.  We  would  seek  to 
guide  the  reader,  therefore,  in  "the  way  of  His  precepts,"  and 
instruct  him  to  love  only  what  is  lovely,  and  what  will  assist  him 
in  the  best  enterprises  and  associations  of  the  soul.  We  would 
admonish  him,  then,  to  "  keep  his  heart  with  all  diligence,  for  out 
of  it  are  the  issues  of  life  ;"  and  how  is  a  house  to  be  kept  or 
guarded  but  at  the  entrance  or  avenues  leading  thereto  ?  So  how 
can  the  heart  be  preserved  except  at  the  senses  ?  "  The  five 
senses,"  says  Adams,  "  are  the  cinque  ports  where  all  the  traffic  of 
the  devil  is  taken  in."  Here  temptation  chiefly  presents  itself, 
and  here  man  needs  to  set  a  double  guard  to  prevent  unlawful 
intrusion. 


LOVE.  jr) 

The  senses  God  has  given 

Arc  inlets  to  the  soul, 
.Fair  doors  that  ope  to  heaven, 

Or  yield  to  sin's  control. 

And  Good  and  Evil  seek 

For  mutual  entrance  there, 
Yea,  constant  watch  they  keep, 

Man's  sympathies  to  share. 

Dark  fiends  hold  earthly  court 

In  unbelieving  breast — 
Sin's  hold,  "  the  strong  man's  "  fort  ! 

"  My  house,"  he  cries — hell's  rest. 
Go,  summon  heavenly  force, 

Lest  they  thy  soul  should  win — 
Keep  guard  :  nought  lurks  so  close 

As  thy  besetting  sin. 

"  He  that  stands  sentry  here  keeps  his  castle  safe,  preserves  the 
purity  of  his  soul,  maintains  his  virgin  innocence,  and  truly  enjoys 
himself.  This  it  was  that  made  the  virgins  cover  their  faces  with 
veils,  that  they  might  neither  tempt  others  with  their  beauty,  nor 
be  tempted  with  the  comely  looks  of  their  spectators  ;  this  made 
the  world  take  notice  of  the  holy  looks  of  Christians,  and  observe 
how  with  their  lives  and  conversation  the  motions  of  their  eyes  and 
all  their  gestures  changed." 

Hence  it  is  that  the  Greeks,  in  order  to  punish  sin  at  the  portal 
where  it  chiefly  entered,  put  out  the  eyes  of  the  criminally  lascivi 
ous.  Zaleucus,  the  lawgiver  of  the  Locrians,  executed  this  law  in 
a  remarkable  manner  on  his  own  son,  "  mitigating  the  sentence  and 
redeeming  one  of  his  son's  eyes  by  another  of  his  own,  so  at  once 
becoming  a  memorable  example  of  justice  and  mercy." 

If,  as  the  Scriptures  say,  some  men's  eyes  are  full  of  this  particu 
lar  kind  of  sin,  what  need  there  is  of  watching  these  watchers   of 


20  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

the  body,  and  of  looking  after  these  lookers  on  the  meretricious  and 
ever-tempting  forbidden. 

If  Job  found  it  necessary  to  make  a  covenant  with  his  eyes  that 
he  might  not  think  of  another  than  his  own  fair  partner,  so  let 
every  man  in  his  early  life  devote  himself  to  one  alone,  and  not 
continue  to  live  at  all  hazard  and  peradventure  ;  but  pray  the 
prayer,  rather,  "  turn  away  mine  eyes  from  beholding  vanity."  For 
though  "  the  wise  man's  eyes  are  in  his  head,  the  fool's  are  in  the 
ends  of  the  earth,"  and  better  is  the  sight  of  the  eyes  than  the  wan 
dering  of  the  desire,  literally,  "  the  walking  of  the  soul." 

"It  is  most  true  that  eyes  are  made  to  serve 

The  inward  light,  and  that  the  heavenly  part 
Ought  to  be  a  king  ;  from  whose  rules  who  do  swerve 
Rebels  to  nature,  strive  for  their  own  smart." 

Their  eyes  but  met  and  then  were  turned  aside ; 

It  was  enough  !  that  mystic  eloquence, 

L'nheard,  yet  visible,  is  deeply  felt, 

And  tells  what  else  were  incommunicable. — Derosi^" 

"The  darts  of  love,  like  lightning,  wound  within, 
And.  though  they  pierce  it,  never  hurt  the  skin  ; 
They  leave  no  marks  behind  them  where  they  fly, 
Though  thro'  the  tendercst  part  of  all,  the  eye." 

"  O  the  eye's  eloquence, 

(Twin-born  with  thought)  outstrips  the  tardy  voice  • 
Far  swifter  than  the  nimble  lightning's  flash, 
The  sluggish  thunder  peal  that  follows  it." 

Man  has  preeminence  above  the  beast  not  only  in  being  possessed 
of  a  soul,  or  an  immortal  principle,  but  also  in  having  an  extra 
muscle  to  his  eye,  a  fifth,  fine  cord,  to  roll  it  upward,  called  by  the 
ancients  the  heaven-string,  and  it  is  a  fact  that  such  string,  cord  or 
muscle,  lay  useless  in  Nebuchadnezzar  all  the  time  that  a  beast's 


LOVE. 

heart  was  given  unto  him  ;  for,  saith  he,  in  speaking  of  his  recovery 
to  man's  estate,  "  And  at  the  end  of  the  days  I  lifted  up  mine  eyes 
unto  heaven,  and  mine  understanding  returned  unto  me,  and  I 
blessed  the  most  high  that  liveth  forever  and  ever." 

"  Behold  Plato's  man,"  said  one,  as  he  threw  down  before  his 
students  a  chicken  stripped  of  its  feathers,  to  show  that  something 
more  was  needed  than  the  possession  of  two  legs  to  make  the  biped 
we  call  "  man." 

"  Behold  a  hieroglyphical  man,"  we  would  say,  as  we  present 
him  after  the  early  fashion  of  picture  writing,  thus  OMO.  Breathe 
on  the  initial  letter  and  you  have  homo  (man).  The  two  <?'s  stand 
for  the  eyes,  and  the  ;;/  for  the  rest  of  the  face. 

Even  as  Dante,  in  describing  the  gaunt  face  of  a  starved  man, 

says  : — • 

*         *  "Who  reads  the  name 

For  man  upon  his  forehead  there,  the  m 
Had  traced  most  closely." 

"That  region  of  the  face,  which  includes  the  eyebrows,  eyes  and 
nose,  also  includes  the  chief  region  of  the  will  and  understanding." 

"  The  eyes,  considered  only  as  tangible  objects,  are,  by  their 
very  forms,  the  windows  of  the  soul  —  the  fountains  of  life  and 
light." 

"  The  images  of  our  secret  agitations  are  particularly  painted  in 
the  eyes,  which  appertain  more  to  the  soul  than  any  other  organ  ; 
which  seem  affected  by  and  to  participate  in  all  its  emotions  ;  ex 
press  sensations  the  most  lively,  passions  the  most  tumultuous,  feel 
ings  the  most  delightful,  and  sentiments  the  most  delicate." 

"Let  thine  eyes,  then,"  O  man,  "look  right  forward,  and  thine 
eyelids  straight  on."  The  dove,  whose  name  rhymes  with  love,  has 
but  one  mate,  but  she  has  ever  that  one,  and  she  loves  till  death. 
So  the  purity  and  faithfulness  of  the  Church,  and  of  Christ  himself, 
are  compared  to  this  bird.  "Thou  ^ast  dove's  eyes  within  thy 


22  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

locks."     "  His  eyes  are  like  the  eyes  of  the  doves  by  the  rivers  of 
water." 

The  question  was  once  asked,  which  was  the  most  beautiful 
eyes,  and  the  answer  came  direct  and  appropriate,  "  The  eyes  of 
compassion  or  love."  So 

Love's  eyes  are  dove's  eyes,  beside  the  crystal  river  ; 
Love's  eyes  are  dove's  eyes,  that  sweetly  beam  forever  ; 
Love's  eyes  are  dove's  eyes,  so  constant  meek  and  pure  ; 
Love's  eyes  are  dove's  eyes,  in  rocky  dwelling,  sure  ; 
Love's  eyes  are  dove's  eyes,  that  seek  the  quiet  bower  ; 
Love's  eyes  are  dove's  eyes — fair  innocence  their  dower  ; 
Love's  eyes  are  dove's  eyes,  beside  the  crystal  river  ; 
Love's  eyes  are  dove's  eyes,  that  sweetly  beam  forever. 

Pericles,  when  Sophocles  showed  him  an  extraordinary  beauty, 
and  seemed  pleased  with  it,  said,  "  it  is  not  enough  to  keep  clean 
hands,  oh,  Sophocles,  but  you  must  keep  your  eyes  clean,  too." 

And  well  does  the  judicious  Hooker  exclaim  :  "Shall  we  suffer 
sin  and  vanity  to  drop  in  at  our  eyes,  and  at  our  ears,  at  every 
corner  of  our  bodies  and  of  our  souls,  knowing  that  we  are  the 
temples  of  the  Holy  Ghost  ?  Which  of  you  receiveth  a  guest  whom 
he  honoreth,  or  whom  he  loveth,  and  doth  not  sweep  his  cham 
ber  against  his  coming  ?  And  shall  we  suffer  the  chamber  of 
our  hearts  and  consciences  to  be  full  of  vomiting,  full  of  filth,  full 
of  garbage,  knowing  that  Christ  hath  said,  "  I  and  my  father  will 
come  and  dwell  with  you  '  ?" 

Bacon,  with  a  depth  of  penetration  peculiar  to  his  own  philo 
sophical  mind,  has  not  lost  sight  of  the  power  of  sigJit  itself,  but 
says  : — 

"  The  affections,  no  doubt,  do  make  the  spirits  more  powerful 
and  active,  and  especially  those  affections  which  draw  the  spirits 
into  the  eyes  ;  which  arc  two,  love  and  envy,  which  is  called  oculus 
mains.  As  for  love,  the  Platonists  (some  of  them)  go  so  far  as  to 


LOVE.  23 

hold  that  the  spirit  of  the  lover  doth  pass  into  the  spirit  of  the 
person  loved,  which  causeth  the  desire  of  return  into  the  body 
whence  it  was  emitted.  Whereupon  followeth  that  appetite  of  con 
tract  and  conjunction  which  is  in  lovers.  And  it  is  observed,  like 
wise,  that  the  aspects  that  procure  love  are  not  gazings,  but  sudden 
glancings  and  dartings  of  the  eye.  As  for  envy,  that  emitteth  some 
malign  and  poisonous  spirits,  which  taketh  hold  of  the  spirit  of 
another;  and  is  likewise  of  greatest  force  when  the  cast  of  the  eye 
is  oblique." 

Let  us  then  begin  all  things  with  God,  and  "set  the  Lord 
always  before  our  face,"  singing  with  the  best  of  our  Christian 
poets  : — 

Him  first  ;  Him  last ;  Him  midst  and  without  end. — Milton. 

From  Thee  begin,  dwell  all  on  Thee,  with 

Thee  conclude  my  song,  and  let  me  never,  never  stray  from  Thee. 
—  Thompson. 

As  also  saith  St.  Paul  :  "  For  of  Him,  and  to  Him,  and  through 
Him,  are  all  things,  to  whom  be  glory  forever.  Amen." 

For  as  there  is  love  in  truth  (gospel  truth  especially),  so  there 
is  truth  in  love  ;  and  truth  must  have  the  first  place  in  all  our  affec 
tions,  pursuits  and  actions,  even  as  the  heathen  themselves  did 
acknowledge  and  teach. 

Hereby  you  shall  know  whether  I  write  in  earnest  or  not  ;  for 
when  I  write  in  earnest  I  begin  my  letter  with  one  God,  and  when 
I  write  not  in  earnest  I  do  begin  my  letter  in  the  name  of  many 
gods. — Plato. 

Before  all  things  we  must  affirm  that  there  is  one  God,  and  that 
this  God  governeth  all.  and  hath  providence  over  all. — Epictetus. 

But  he  that  lacketh  these  things  is  blind,  and  cannot  see  afar 
off,  and  hath  forgotten  that  he  was  purged  from  his  old  sins. — James. 

Anoint  thine  eyes  with  eye-salve  that  thou  mayest  see. — 
Revelation. 


PROPOSAL   AND    ESPOUSAL. 

"'Pure,  sweet,  serene, 

The  light  of  heaven  in  her  eyes, 
She  moved  about  our  lower  earth, 

Oft  bringing  a  glad  surprise 
To  others  who  found  their  daily  lives 

Only  dull  cankering  care  ; 
For  one  of  God's  angels  seem  to  stoop 

In  their  homely  tasks  to  share. 

Bright  wings  she  wore, 

But  folded  out  of  our  sight  ; 
To  serve  in  lowly,  simple  ways 

Was  sweeter  to  her  than  flight. 
But  ever  she  welcomed  with  ear  attent 

Voices  from  heaven  still  and  small, 
Till  gladly  her  spirit  upward  sped 

At  her  loving  Father's  call." 

Ye  are  stars  of  the  night,  ye  are  gems  of  the  morn, 
Ye  are  dewdrops  whose  lustre  illumines  the  thorn  ; 
And  ray  less  that  night  is,  that  morning  unblest 
Where  no  beam  in  your  eye  lights  up  peace  in  our  breast. 

"O  eyes,  which  do  the  spheres  of  beauty  move, 

Whose  beams  be  joys,  whose  joys  all  virtues  be  ; 
Who,  \\hile  they  make  love  conquer,  conquer  love  ; 

The  schools  where  Venus  hath  learned  chastity. 
O  eyes,  where  humble  looks  most  glorious  prove, 

Only  loved  tyrants,  just  in  cruelty  ; — - 
Do  not,  O  do  not,  from  poor  me  remove, 

Keep  still  my  zenith,  ever  shine  on  me ! 
For  though  I  never  see  them,  but  straightways 

My  life  forgets  to  nourish  languished  sprites  ; 
Yet  still  on  me,  O  eyes,  dart  down  your  rays  I 

And  if  from  majesty  of  sacred  lights 


LOVE.  25 

Oppressing  mortal  sense  my  death  proceed, 
Wreck's  triumphs  be  which  love  high  set  doth  breed." 

"Magic,  wonder-beaming  eye  ; 
In  thy  narrow  circle  lie 
All  our  varied  hopes  and  fears, 
Sportive  smiles  and  graceful  tears  ; 
Eager  wishes,  wild  alarms, 
Rapid  feelings,  potent  charms, 
Wit  and  genius,  taste  and  sense, 
Lend  through  thee  their  influence. 
Honest  index  of  the  soul, 
Nobly  scorning  all  control  ; 
Silent  language  ever  flowing, 
Every  secret  thought  avowing, 
Pleasure's  seat,  love's  favorite  throne, 
Every  triumph  is  thy  own  " 

"They  say  the  brunettes  are  arch  coquettes, 

That  they  break  the  hearts  that  love  them, 
But  that  eyes  of  blue  are  tender  and  true 
As  the  sky  that  bends  above  them. 

Ah  !  but  you  will  find  love  is  color-blind, 
And  he  comes  with  as  little  warning" 

o 

To  hearts  that  lie  back  of  eyes  that  are  black 
As  of  those  that  are  blue  as  the  morning. 

So  all  the  coquettes  are  not  the  brunettes, 

Nor  the  maidens  with  golden  tresses  ; 
There  are  those  unto  whom  love  never  has  come 

With  his  kisses  and  caresses." 

N.    Y.  Mail  and  Express. 

Oh  !  o'er  the  eye  Death  most  exerts  his  might, 

And  hurls  the  spirit  from  her  throne  of  light. — Byron. 


LOVE  HKTTER  THAN  LATIN. 


NE  pleasant  evening  in  summer  I  sat  talking  with  a 
mother,  who  held  upon  her  lap  a  restless,  teasing  child. 
I  spoke  hopefully  of  the  future,  and  chanced  to  touch 
upon  my  future  course  of  study.  She  wearily  replied  : 
"  The  time  was  when  I,  too,  looked  forward  to  the 
future, — my  whole  aim  being  to  study  Latin  ;  but  I  gave  it  up, 
for  what — drudgery.  O,  I  was  foolish."  "  No,  no,  mamma,"  said 
the  little  sprite.  "  Not  foolish,  for  if  you  had  studied  Latin  you 
wouldn't  had  me  now."  Sweet  comforter !  The  mother  drew  the 
little  one  to  her  bosom,  saying  :  "  True,  darling,  you  are  better  than 
Latin."  How  I  longed  for  every  complaining  mother  of  the  land 
to  witness  with  me  this  little  scene  ;  each  one  to  hear  the  child's 
rebuke. 

LOVE    BETTER    THAN     KNOWLEDGE. 


"  Knowledge  puffeth  up,  but  charity  edifieth,"  i.  e.  buildcth  up. 
Charity  envieth  not ;  charity  vauntcth  not  itself,  is   not  puffed 
up. — Paul. 

LOVE    BETTER    THAN    GIFTS. 


But  covet  earnestly  the  best  gifts  :  and  yet  shew  I  unto  you  a 
more  excellent  way. 

Though  I  speak  with  the  tongues  of  men  and  of  angels,  and 
have  not  charity,  I  am  become  as  sounding  brass,  or  a  tinkling 
cymbal. 

And  though  I  have  the  gift  of  prophecy,  and  understand  all 
mysteries,  and  all  knowledge  ;  and  though  I  have  all  faith,  so  that 
I  could  remove  mountains,  and  have  not  charity,  I  am  nothing. 

26 


Ah !  where  did  baby  start  from, 
And  how  far  has  he  come  ? 
What  angel-bright  conductor 
Did  guide  him  to  our  home  ? 


LOVE. 

And  though  I  bestow  all  my  goods  to  feed  the  poor,  and  though 
I  give  my  body  to  be  burned,  and  have  not  charity,  it  profiteth  me 
nothing. 

Charity  never  faileth :  but  whether  there  be  prophecies,  they 
shall  fail  ;  whether  there  be  tongues,  they  shall  cease  ;  whether  there 
be  knowledge,  it  shall  vanish  away. 

Follow  after  charity,  and  desire  spiritual  gifts.— Ibid. 


LOVE    THE    GREATEST     COMFORT. 

If  there  be  therefore  any  consolation  in  Christ,  if  any  comfort 
of  love,  if  any  fellowship  of  the  Spirit,  if  any  bowels  and  mercies. 

Fulfil  ye  my  joy,  that  ye  be  like-minded,  having  the  same  love, 
being  of  one  accord,  of  one  mind. 

LOVE,    ITS    EXPULSIVE    POWER. 


Such  is  the  power  of  that  sweet  passion, 

That  it  all  sordid  baseness  doth  expel, 

And  the  refined  mind  doth  newly  fashion 

Unto  a  fairer  form,  which  now  doth  dwell 

In  his  high  thought,  and  would  itself  excel; 

Which  he,  beholding  still  with  constant  sight, 

Admires  the  mirror  of  so  heavenly  light. — Spenser. 

LOVE'S    HOLY    INFLUENCE. 

By  love's  delightful  influence  the  attack  of  ill-humour  is  resisted, 
the  violence  of  our  passions  abated,  the  bitter  cup  of  affliction 
sweetened,  all  the  injuries  of  the  world  alleviated,  and  the  sweetest 
flowers  plentifully  strewed  along  the  most  thorny  paths  of  life.— 


28  PROPOSAL   AND    ESPOUSAL. 

Tis  love  combined  with  guilt  alone,  that   melts 

The  soften'd  soul  to  cowardice  and  sloth  ; 

But  virtuous  passions  prompt  the  great  resolve, 

And  fan  the  slumbering  spark  of  heavenly  fire. — Johnson. 


LOVE    A    GIANT  POWER. 


Love  is  such  a  giant  power  that  it  seems  to  gather  strength 
from  obstruction,  and  at  every  difficulty  rises  to  higher  might.  It 
is  all  dominent — all  conquering  ;  a  great  leveller  which  can  bring 
down  to  its  own  universal  line  of  equalization  the  proudest  heights, 
and  remove  the  stubbornest  impediments.  There  is  no  hope  of 
resisting  it,  for  it  outwatches  watch — submerges  everything,  acquir 
ing  strength  as  it  proceeds  ;  ever  growing,  nay,  growing  out  of 
itself. — Xeivton. 

Love !  what  a  volume  in  a  word  !  an  ocean  in  a  tear  ! 
A  seventh  heaven  in  a  glance  !  a  whirlwind  in  a  sigh ! 
The  lightning  in  a  touch — a  millennium  in  a  moment ! 
What  concentrated  joy,  or  woe,  in  bless'd  or  blighted  love  ! 

—  Tupper- 

LOVE'S    YOKE    EASY. 

Life  without  love's  a  load,  and  time  stands  still  ; 
What  we  refuse  to  him,  to  death  we  give  ; 
And  then,  then  only,  when  we  love,  we  live. — Congreve. 
Almighty  love !    what  wonders  are  not  thine  ' 
Soon  as  thy  influence  breaths  upon  the  soul, 
By  thee,  the  haughty  bend  the  suppliant  knee- 
By  thee,  the  hand  of  avarice  is  open'd 
Into  profusion  ;  by  thy  power,  the  heart 
Of  cruelty  is  melted  into  softness  ; 
The  rude  grow  tender,  and  the  fearful  bold. — Paterson. 


LOVE.  29 

Like  the  fabled  lamp  in  the  sepulchre,  thou  sheddest  thy  pure 
light  in  the  human  heart,  when  everything  around  thee  there  is 
dead  for  ever  ! — Carleton. 


ADAM'S    IMPRESSIONS    ON    SEEING    EVE. 


When  Adam  is  introduced  by  Milton,  describing  Eve  in  para 
dise,  and  relating  to  an  angel  the  impressions  he  felt  on  seeing  her 
at  her  first   creation,   he  does   not  represent  her — like  a  Grecian 
Venus — by  her  shape,  or  features,  but  by  the  lustre  of  her  mind 
which  shone  in  them,  and  gave  them  their  power  of  charming : 
"Grace  was  in  all  her  steps,  heaven  in  her  eye, 
In  every  gesture — dignity  and  love." 


LOVE'S    ECSTASY. 


Oh  !  speak  the  joy,  ye  whom  the  sudden  tear 

Surprises  often,  while  you  look  around, 

And  nothing  strikes  your  eye  but  sights  of  bliss  ; 

All  various  natures  pressing  on  the  heart. 

An  elegant  sufficiency,  content, 

Retirement,  rural  quiet,  friendship,  books, 

Ease  and  alternate  labour,  useful  life, 

Progressive  virtue,  and  approving  heaven  ; 

Those  are  the  matchless  joys  of  virtuous  love. —  Thomson. 


LOVE'S    FLAME    THE    PUREST. 


Affection  lights  a  purer  flame 
Than  ever  blazed  by  art. — Cowper. 


O,  •'  Love  is  of  God,"  it  is  said  by  the  saint, 
Who  leaned  on  Immanuel's  breast ; 


3°  PROPOSAL   AND    KSI'OUSAL. 

When  love  waxeth  cold,  then  the  heart  groweth  faint, 

And  man  is  a  mourner  unblest 
Love  is  the  dwelling  of  spirits  new-born  ; 

Yea,  love  is  the  home  of  the  soul  : 
And  only  the  reprobate  treat  it  with  scorn, 

For  love  makes  the  wounded  heart  whole. 


LOVE'S    ALACRITY. 


Love  brooks  no  restriction,  and  is  impatient  of  delay.  It  is 
ever  "on  time,"  and  anticipates  the  sun,  saying  as  in  David'  "  Mine 
eyes  prevent  the  dawning  of  the  day."  It  sets  the  clock  forward, 
and  would  fain  do  the  same  with  lagging  opportunity.  It  is  alert, 
eager,  watchful,  as  it  cries  in  the  Psalms,  "Thou  holdest  mine  eyes 
waking,"  and  exclaims  with  the  spouse  in  the  "  Song  of  Songs,/  "  I 
sleep,  but  my  heart  wakcth."  It  counts  the  days,  hours,  minutes, 
seconds.  It  invents  no  excuses,  for  it  needeth  none.  It  sees,  hears, 
moves!  It  has  the  eye  of  a  lynx,  the  ear  of  a  mole;  it  sleeps 
like  a  deer,  and  wakes  like  a  bird — agile,  thoughful,  tuneful,  hope 
ful,  glowing,  mighty  love  ! 

Make  haste,  my  beloved,  and  be  thou  like  to  a  roe,  or  to  a 
young  hart  on  the  mountains  of  Bether. — Canticles. 

It  is  the  voice  of  my  beloved,  behold  he  comcth  leaping  upon 
the  mountains,  skipping  upon  the  hills. — Ibid. 

And  the  young  man  deferred  not  to  do  the  thing,  because  he 
had  delight  in  Jacob's  daughter  :  and  he  was  more  honorable  than 
all  the  house  of  his  father. — Bible. 

Then  said  she,  Sit  still,  my  daughter,  until  thou  know  how  the 
matter  will  fall :  for  the  man  will  not  be  in  rest  until  he  have  fin 
ished  the  thing  this  day. — Ruth. 

And  there  was  set  meat  before  him  to  eat ;  but  he  said,  I  will  not 
eat  until  I  have  told  mine  errand.  And  he  said,  speak  on. — Genesis. 

The  king's  business  rcquireth  haste. — Bible. 


LOVE.  31 

Send  Ipigcnia  quickly  forth  with  me, 
Hymen  is  .now  propitious,  all  things  wait 
To  grace  the  solemn  gladness  of  this  day  ; 
The  holy  water's  ready,  with  the  cakes, 
To  cast  upon  the  fire,  the  calves  are  brought, 
Whose  blood  in  grateful  vapors  must  arise, 
T'  atone  the  breach  of  chaste  Diana's  rites. 

- — Potter  s  Antiquities. 

"Tis  love  that  makes  our  cheerful  feet 
In  swift  obedience  move." 


And   they  ran   and  returned  as  the  appearance  of  a  flash  of 
lightning. — Ezekiel. 

O  love  !  O  love  !  'tis  love  dat  moved  de  mighty  God ; 
O  love  !  O  love  !  'tis  love  dat  died  for  me  : 
O  love !  O  love  !  'tis  love  dat  drives  my  chariot  wheels  ; 
O  love !  O  love !  and  death  must  yield  to  love. 

'Tis  love  dat  sot  me  free, 

'Tis  love  dat  died  for  me  ! — Stanza  of  Negro  Melody. 


PAIRING     SEASON. 

Now  'tis  nought 

But  restless  hurry  thro'  the  busy  air, 
Beat  by  unnumber'd  wings.      The  swallow  sweeps 
The  slimy  pool,  to  build  his  hanging  house 
Intent.     And  often,  from  the  careless  back 
Of  herds  and  flocks  a  thousand  tugging  bills 
Pluck  hair  and  wool  ;  and  oft,  when  unobserv'd 
Steal  from  the  barn  a  straw  :  still  soft  and  warm, 
Clean  and  complete,  their  habitation  grows. —  Thompson. 


LOVE    AS    A    MARSHALL. 


iND  Jacob  lifted  up  his  eyes,  and  looked,  and,  behold, 
Esau  came,  and  with  him  four  hundred  men.  And  he 
divided  the  children  unto  Leah,  and  unto  Rachel,  and 
unto  the  two  handmaids. 

And  he  put  the  handmaids  and  their  children  fore 
most,  and  Leah  and  her  children  after,  and  Rachel  and  Joseph 
hindermost. 

And  he  passed  over  before  them,  and  bowed  himself  to  the 
ground  seven  times,  until  he  came  near  to  his  brother. 

And  Esau  ran  to  meet  him,  and  embraced  him,  and  fell  on  his 
neck  and  kissed  him  :  and  they  wept. 

And  he  lifted  up  his  eyes,  and  saw  the  women  and  the  children, 
and  said,  Who  are  those  with  thee  ?  And  he. said,  The  children 
which  God  hath  graciously  given  thy  servant. 

Then  the  handmaidens  came  near,  they  and  their  children,  and 
they  bowed  themselves. 

And  Leah  also  with  her  children  came  near,  and  bowed  them 
selves  :  and  after  came  Joseph  near  and  Rachel,  and  they  bowed 
themselves. 

And  he  said,  What  meanest  thou  by  all  this  drove  which  I  met? 
And  he  said,  These  are  to  find  grace  in  the  sight  of  my  lord. 

And  Esau  said,  I  have  enough,  my  brother ;  keep  what  thou 
hast  unto  thyself. 

And  Jacob  said,  Nay,  I  pray  thce,  if  now  I  have  found  grace  in 
thy  sight,  then  receive  my  present  at  my  hand  :  for  therefore  I 


LOVE.  33 

have  seen  thy  face,  as  though  I  had  seen  the  face  of  God,  and  thou 
wast  pleased  with  me. 

Take,  I  pray  thee,  my  blessing  which  is  brought  thee  ;  because 
God  hath  dealt  graciously  with  me,  and  because  I  have  enough. 
And  he  urged  him,  and  he  took  it. 

And  he  said,  Let  us  take  our  journey,  and  let  us  go,  and  I  will 
go  before  thee. 

And  he  said  unto  him,  My  lord  knoweth  that  the  children  are 
tender,  and  the  flocks  and  herds  with  young  are  with  me  :  and  if 
men  should  overdrive  them  one  day  all  the  flocks  will  die. 

Let  my  lord,  I  pray  thee,  pass  over  before  his  servant  :  and  I 
will  lead  on  softly,  according  as  the  cattle  thatgoeth  before  me  and 
the  children  be  able  to  endure,  until  I  come  unto  my  lord  unto  Seir. 


See  the  tact  displayed  by  Jacob  in  this  unwonted  emergency. 
Behold  how  he  places  the  dearest  the  nearest  to  his  person,  and 
how  Rachel  and  her  children  move  close  beside  him  in  the  proces 
sion  of  the  great,  kindred  caravan.  How  suggestive  of  the  blessed, 
comforting  text  :  "  The  beloved  of  the  Lord  shall  dwell  in  safety  by 
Him,  and  He  will  cover  him  with  His  hand  all  the  day  long."  And 
though  God  is  no  respecter  of  persons,  yet  he  has  ever  had  those  to 
whom  He  showed  special  regard,  for  He  that  readeth  the  heart 
knoweth  who  is  most  worthy.  Peter,  James  and  John  stood  fore 
most  in  the  Redeemer's  esteem,  and  subsequent  events  proved  to 
the  church  and  the  world  the  correctness  of  the  Saviour's  choice 
They  are  the  chiefest  of  the  Twelve  in  their  usefulness.  See  Peter 
at  Pentecost ;  see  John  at  the  cross,  and  read  James'  scathing  re 
proof  to  the  pride  of  the  primal  Christian  congregations.  These 
are  almost  the  only  men  of  the  Twelve  that  have  written  epistles 
or  letters  to  the  churches  ;  and  though  Peter  followed  Jesus  afar  off 
(as  it  is  written  of  him),  yet  he  did  follow,  which  is  more  than  is 
declared  of  many  of  the  rest,  who  all  forsook  him  and  fled 


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LOVE    AS    A    CHARIOTEER. 


. 


Ds 

EVER   I  was  aware  (I  knew  nothing)  my  soul  made 
me  like  the  chariots  of  Amminadab. — Canticles. 

I  ran  as  swift  as  the  nobles  of  my  people  in  their 
chariots. — Marginal  Reading. 

Then  she  saddled  an  ass,  and  said  to  her  servant 
Drive,  and  go  forward  ;  slack  not  thy  riding  for  me,  except  I  bid 
thee. 

"SLACK    NOT    THY    RIDING    EXCEPT    I    P.ID   THEE." 

"Whate'cr  may  chance  us  on  the  way, 
Whoe'er  may  wish  our  course  to  stay, 

Thy  riding  do  not  slack  ; 
For  salutations  now  no  time, 
To  pause  were  little  less  than  crime, 

Be  lightness  driven  back. 

Our  cause  demands  the  utmost  haste, 
A  life  is  lost  if  time  we  waste, 

Thy  riding  do  not  slack  :" — 
That  Shunnamite,  my  soul,  is  thee, 
Thou  rid'st  the  Truth  ;  Alacrity 

The  lad  that  holds  not  back. 

A  thousand  ills  may  thee  beset, 
Obstruction  block  thy  pathway,  ye?, 
Thy  riding  do  not  slack  ; 


LOVE.  35 

The  God,  who  bids  thee  forward  go, 
Will  lay  proud  opposition  low, 

And  drive  the  oppressor  back. 

God's  arm  directed  David's  stone, 
When  he  Goliah  met,  alone, — 

Thy  riding  do  not  slack  ; 
The  Lord,  a  "  man  of  war,"  is  known, 
Philistia  soon  was  overthrown, 

Dread  Gath  was  driven  baclv. 

See  Gideon's  troop,  with  trump  and  lamp, 
Surrounding  sleeping  Midian's  camp  : 

Thy  riding  do  not  slack  ; 
The  "  pitchers  "  break— the  lights  outflare  ! 
A  sound  of  "  sword  "  and  "  God  "  in  air, 

Hurls  th'  alien  armies  back. 

See  Jericho's  high-standing  wall, 
Her  "  Gammadim  "  in  towers  tall  *. 

Thy  riding  do  not  slack  ; — 
The  trumpeters  go  round  and  round  — 
One  last,  long  blast — it  shakes  the  ground, 

The  giant  hosts  fall  back. 

No  lion  treads  the  "  narrow  way," 
No  ravenous  beast  may  thee  waylay, 

Thy  riding  do  not  slack  ; 
They  roar  and  rage,  but  strong  their  chain, 
They  fret  themselves  and  howl  in  vain, 

Christ  drives  e'en  devils  back. 


"  Would  you  not  be  afraid  to  go  to  heaven  as  Elijah  did  ?" 
asked  one  of  a  little  boy.  "  No,"  he  replied,  "  not  if  God  were 
the  driver." 


t^K^-^H  3»>§3 


"DEVIL,    J     NEVER    STUCK    EAST    YET;" 

OR     SAMMY     HICKS. 


MUEL  HICKS  was  one  of  the  men  of  "  mighty  faith" 
in  the  Lord,  and  as  a  preacher  among  the  Methodists 
k^     of  England,  was  eminent  for  his   happy  spirit,  remark  - 
5^     able  trust,  and  unbounded  liberality. 

At  one  time  he  attended  a  missionary  meeting  near 
Harrowgate.  "  \Vc  had  a  blessed  meeting,"  said  Samuel,  "  I  was  very 
happy  and  gave  all  the  money  I  had  in  my  pocket."  After  the  meet 
ing  was  concluded  he  mounted  his  horse  to  return  home.  No  one 
had  offered  to  pay  his  expenses  —  he  had  not  a  farthing  in  his  pocket. 
Advanced  in  life  —  a  slow  rider,  and  not  a  very  sprightly  horse  —  in 
the  night  —  alone  —  twenty  miles  from  home.  Think  of  the  lone- 
someness  ;  the  time  for  the  tempter  to  come  and  lead  him  to  dis 
trust  his  Lord.  But  he  struggled  ;  the  trial  was  short,  and  the 
victory  complete,  for  said  he,  "  Devil,  I  never  stuck  fast  yet" 

Just  as  he  entered  Harewood,  a  gentleman  took  his  horse  by 
the  bridle,  asked  him  where  he  had  been,  talked  with  him  long,  and 
to  whom  Samuel's  talk  was  a  wonderful  consolation.  Said  Sammy  : 
"  I  have  not  wanted  for  any  good  thing,  and  could  always  pray 
with  Job,  '  The  Lord  gave  and  the  Lord  takcth  away,  blessed  be 
the  name  of  the  Lord.'  '' 

The  gentleman  asked,  "  Can  you  read  ?" 
"  Yes,"  returned  Samuel. 

"  Then,"  replied  the  gentleman,  holding  a  piece  of  paper  in  his 
hand,  which  was  rendered  visible  by  the  glimmering  light  of  the 

36 


LOVE.  37 

stars,  "  there  is  a  five-pound  note  for  you.     You  love  God  and  His 
cause,  and  I  believe  you  will  never  want." 

And  Sammy  said,  "  I  cried  for  joy.  This  was  a  fair  salvation 
from  the  Lord.  When  I  got  home,  I  told  my  wife.  She  burst  into 
tears,  and  we  praised  the  Lord  together,  and  he  added  :  "  You  see, 
we  never  give  to  the  Lord  but  he  gives  in  return." —  Wonders  of 
Prayer. 

DRIVE    ON. 


"  Drive  on  until  the  devil  is  driven  out  of  the  country,"  was  the 
usual  salutation  extended  to  his  itinerating  brethren  by  one  of 
America's  most  ardent  Methodistic  pioneers.  Would  that  the  in 
junction  was  more  universally  heeded  by  his  successors. 

You  all  know  the  name  of  that  great  Welsh  Baptist  minister, 
Christmas  Evans,  and  how  gloriously  he  preached.  He  was  accus 
tomed  to  spend  much  of  his  time  in  making  evangelistic  journeys 
from  town  to  town,  with  his  little  pony  and  chaise  ;  and  so,  when 
he  came  to  die,  they  gathered  around  the  old  man  to  listen  to  his 
last  words,  and  after  he  had  said  some  things  about  his  Master,  he 
began  to  dream,  and  the  very  last  thing  he  said  was,  "  Drive  on, 
drive  on."  And  somehow  I  thought  it  was  a  very  good  word  to 
address  to  you,  my  brethren  of  the  Baptist  Union,  and  to  you,  my 
brethren  of  all  Christian  denominations.  Drive  on  !  Drive  on  ! 
There  is  such  a  tendency  to  pull  up  to  refresh — such  a  tendency  to 
get  out  of  the  gig  and  say,  "  What  a  wonderful  horse  !  Never  saw 
a  horse  go  over  hill  and  dale  like  this  horse — the  best  horse  that 
ever  was  ;  real  sound  Methodist- or  Baptist  horse."  Now,  brother, 
admire  your  horse  as  you  like,  but  drive  on.  I  have  known  some 
to  have  often  felt  a  sort  of  disposition  to  go  back  ;  they  have  been 
afraid.  "  Philosophers  tell  us  that  the  road  is  up  ;  we  cannot  go 


38  PROPOSAL  AND   ESPOUSAL. 

uiat  way  ;"  but  I  say,  Drive  on,  over  philosophers  and  all.  You  will 
find,  when  you  get  to  that  desperately  bad  piece  of  road  that  they 
are  always  telling  us  of,  that,  after  all,  it  has  been  improved  by 
being  broken  up  a  little  and  being  rolled  down  again — at  any  rate 
drive  on  !  Oh,  if  there  are  any  of  you  that  have  got  to  sitting  still 
in  your  gig,  admiring  the  scenery  and  counting  over  the  souls  that 
you  have  already  brought  in,  drive  on,  brethren,  do  drive  on.  Your 
Lord  and  Master  tells  you  to  "go  into  all  the  world  and  preach  the 
gospel  to  every  creature  ;"  and  you  feel  perfectly  certain  that  you 
have  obeyed  that  command  because  you  have  opened  a  little  room 
three  and  a  half  miles  from  where  you  are !  There  is  more  to  be 
done,  a  great  deal,  than  you  have  attempted,  and  much  more  than, 
if  you  have  attempted  it,  you  will  be  likely  to  accomplish — drive 
on. — $  fin  r^con. 


TOO     FAST    DRIVING. 


Come  and  see  my  zeal  for  the  Lord  of  Hosts. — Jehu. 

The  driving  is  like  the  driving  of  Jehu,  the  son  of  Nimshi,  for 
he  driveth  furiously. —  Watchman  on  the  City  Wall. 

For  I  bear  them  record  that  they  have  a  zeal  of  God,  but  not 
according  to  knowledge.. — Paul. 

Be  not  right(/7/^)cous  overmuch,  why  should jst  thou  destroy 
thyself. — Solomon. 

Beware  of  driving  too  furiously  at  first  setting  out.  Take  the 
cool  of  the  day.  Begin  as  you  can  hold  on.  I  knew  a  lady  who, 
to  prove  herself  perfect,  ripped  off  her  flounces  and  would  not  wear 
an  ear-ring,  a  necklace,  a  ring,  or  an  inch  of  lace.  Ruffles  were 
Babylonish,  a  ribbon  was  carnal ;  and  yet  under  all  this  parade  of 
outside  humility,  the  fair  ascetic  was — but  I  forbear  to  particularize, 
suffice  it  to  say,  that  she  was  a  conceited  antinomian. —  Toplady. 


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LOVE'S    COYNESS. 


is  the  embodiment  of  Shelley's  poetical  "  Echoes," 
going  flying  on,  ever  on,  but  still  crying,  '  Follow, 
follow."  It  is  the  dusky  maiden,  mounted  on  her 
Barbary  steed,  that  (seemingly)  hastens  her  escape 
from  her  pursuing  lover,  but  halts  to  be  caught,  and 
would  not  for  the  world  distance  her  pursuer.  It  is  the  "  fox 
that  feigns  sleep  to  catch  the  chickens."  It  is  the  Spanish  friar 
that  says,  "I  don't  want  it;  I  don't  want  it,  but  drop  it  into  my 
hat."  Yea,  it  is  Solomon's  shrewd  buyer,  who  voiceth,  "It  is 'naught, 
it  is  naught,  but  when  he  is  gone  away  then  he  boasteth."  So  is 
it,  so  has  it  ever  been,  and  so  will  it  be,  so  "  long  as  the  grass  grows 
and  water  runs." 


I  find  she  loves  him  much,  because  she  hides  it. 

Love  teaches  cunning  even  to  innocence  ; 

And,  when  he  gets  possession,  his  first  work 

Is  to  dig  deep  within  a  heart,  and  there 

Lie  hid,  and,  like  a  miser  in  the  dark, 

To  feast  a4one.  —Dryden. 


"Love  me,  love,  but  breathe  it  low, 

Soft  as  summer  weather  ; 
If  you  love  me,  tell  me  so, 

As  we  sit  together. 
Sweet  and  still  as  roses  blow — 
Love  me,  love  me,  but  breathe  it  low. 

39 


4O  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

Words  for  others,  storm  and  snow, 
Wind  and  changeful  weather  — 

Let  the  shallow  waters  flow 
Foaming  on  together  ; 

Hut  love  is  still  and  deep,  and  O  ! 

Love  me,  love,  but  breathe  it  low." 


The  girls  of  Italy,  who  know  how  often  this  artifice  is  employed 
in  affairs  of  love,  have  a  ready  retort  against  sarcastic  young  gen 
tlemen  in  the  adage,  "  He  that  finds  fault  would  fain  buy." 


"  The  sweetest  grapes  hang  highest." 

"  I  Ic  that  lacks  (disparages)  my  mare  would  buy  my  mare." 

1  '  Sour  grapes,'  said  the  fox  when  he  could  not  reach  them." 

"  Tho  figs  on  the  far  side  of  the  hedge  are  sweetest." 

'  Kvcry  fish  that  escapes  appears  greater  than  it  is." 

*'  Far  awav  fuwl  have  fair  feathers." 


She  wad  vote  the  border  knight, 
Though  she  would  vote  her  love  ; 
For  far-off  fowls  hae  feathers  fair, 
And  fools  o'  chancre  are  fair. — Burns. 


"  She  lookit  at  the  moon,  but  lichit  i'  the  midden." 

It  is  recorded  of  a  celebrated  beauty,  Becky  Monteith,  that 
being  asked  how  she  had  not  made  a  good  marriage,  she  replied  : 
"  Ye  see,  I  wadna  hae  the  walkers  and  the  riders  gaed  by." — Ram 
say  s  Reminiscences. 


LOVE.  41 

Though  the  laws  of  propriety  are  so  rigorously  strict  in  Mexico 
that  a  gentleman  may  not  ride  in  the  same  carriage  with  the  lady 
to  whom  he  is  betrothed,  yet  most  desperate  flirtations  are  openly 
indulged  in  to  an  extent  which  would  put  to  blush  New  York, 
Chicago  or  San  Francisco.  Following  a  senorita  up  and  down  the 
promenade,  and  staring  intently  in  her  face  is  an  accepted  mode  of 
compliment  gratifying  to  the  recipient,  but  fraught  with  danger  to 
the  adorer  if  she  happens  to  have  other  devoted  swains,  and  it  not 
unfrequently  happens  that  duels  are  the  result,  she  being  pre-emi 
nently  the  belle  who  can  boast  the  greatest  number  of  such 
encounters. 

A  romantic  love  story  is  at  present  going  the  rounds  of  the 
Italian  papers.  In  1881,  a  young  merchant  in  Boulogne  fell  in 
love  with  a  beautiful  girl,  who  reciprocated  his  feelings.  But  the 
young  man  was  so  absurdly  jealous  that  the  girl  concluded  the  only 
way  to  make  him  more  reasonable  would  be  to  break  the  engage 
ment,  and  keep  him  at  a  distance  for  a  while.  But  this  only  in 
creased  his  passion,  and  one  day,  after  being  again  refused,  he 
pulled  out  a  revolver  and  shot  her.  The  shot  was  not  fatal,  but  the 
girl  was  ill  for  a  long  time,  while  her  lover  was  sentenced  to  twelve 
years'  imprisonment.  Recently  the  girl  has  been  visiting  the  pris 
oner,  and  the  other  day  she  informed  her  parents  that  she  had  made 
up  her  mind  to  marry  her  lover,  notwithstanding  all  that  had  hap 
pened,  and  in  prison.  The  ceremony  was  performed  without  op 
position,  and  a  petition  is  now  in  circulation  to  secure  a  pardon  for 
tnc  young  merchant. 


LOVE'S    YOUNG    DREAM. 


OW  men  love  dreams — especially  \vo-vien.  How,  sur 
rounded  by  the  halo  of  romance,  many  of  our  young 
sisters  dream  away  in  useless  reverie,  their  invaluable 
lives  : — 

"As  idle  as  a  painted  ship, 
Upon  a  painted  ocean." 

And  between  night  dreams  and  day  dreams  there  is  little  left 
for  the  hours  of  purposeful  waking.  But  the  waking  comes  at  last, 
however  much  deferred,  and  however  much  the  charmed  victims  of 
beguiling  sloth  may  fold  their  arms  for  a  season  of  more  prolonged 
and  beguiling  slumber,  and  pleading  cry  : — 

"If  this  be  a  dream,  let  me  sleep  on, 
And  do  not  wake  me  yet." 

Every  dream  must  be  broken.  "  Error  has  no  future."  Fancy 
is  ephemeral —  a  mere,  dancing  day-fly.  Imagination,  that  irre 
pressible  high-flyer,  must  come  down  from  his  visionary  altitudes, 
and  his  phantasmagoric  ascensions. 

Icarus'  wings  of  wax  will  melt  as  he  approaches  the  sun  of 
meridian  (or  mid-life)  truth.  Fact,  stern  fact,  iron,  inexorable,  aye, 
inevitable  fact,  awaits  us  all.  And  woe  to  the  soul  who  is  not  pre 
pared  to  meet  it.  And  (both  as  it  regards  this  present  and  the 
future  life)  :— 

"Truth  known  too  late  is  hell." — Young. 

42 


Tiiere's  nothing  halt'  so  sweet  m  life  as  Love's  young  dream, 


LOVE.  43 

Casting  down  imaginations  is  one  of  the  mighty  offices  of  the 
Holy  Spirit  in  these  "  last  times."  And  where  is  the  youthful  soul 
that  is  not  too  much  committed  to  the  wild  wings  of  a  "  vain  im 
agination  ?"  All  evil  begins  there — in  the  image  making  faculty 
of  the  soul.  That  is  man's  idol  manufactory — his  false-god  shop. 

They  set  up  their  idols  in  their  hearts,  and  the  stumbling  block 
of  iniquity  before  their  face,  and  shall  I  be  enquired  of  by  them.- 
Ezekiel. 

But  the  emotion  of  youthful  love,  chaste  in  its  virgin  freshness, 
and  beautiful  in  its  primal  and  implicit  trust,  is  a  most  glorious  and 
enchanting  thing  ;  almost  justifying  the  poet's  musical  and  hyper 
bolical  expression  :— 

"There  is  nothing  half  so  sweet  in  life  as  love's  young  dream." 

But,  alas,  like  Ephraim's  piety  (as  reproved  by  the  prophet), 
"it  is  like  the  morning  cloud,  and  as  the  early  dew  it  goeth  away." 
The  morning  cloud  is  golden  or  ambient,  bright  and  fraught  with 
sunlight—"  full  with  the  glory  of  the  day,"— and  the  early  dew 
sparkles  again  with  the  gathering  lustre— brightning  yet  as  the 
beams  of  the  sun  increase— until  at  last  it  mirrors  the  face  of  the 
"  king  of  day  "  in  all  his  mounting  splendor  ;  but  the  warm  bright 
ness  consumes  it — it  dies  in  its  own  glory — "  it  goeth  away." 
with  young  love,  it  is  too  fair,  too  sweet,  too  pure  and  delectable, 
too  ethereal  for  earthly  continuance,  and  we  join  with  another  poet 

in  exclaiming : — 

"  Love  !  oh  young  love, 

Why  hast  thou  not  security  ?" 

Oh  !  how  this  spring  of  love  resembleth 
The  uncertain  glory  of  an  April  day  ! 
Which  now  shows  all  the  beauty  of  the  sun, 

And  by-and-by  a  cloud  takes  all  away.— Shakespeare. 
Yes,  young  love  resembles  an  April  day,  Where  we  find  "  shadow 
and  sunshine  intermingling  quick." 


44  PROPOSAL  AND  ESPOUSAL. 

A  FACT. 

Miss   Fanny,   in  a  dream, 
Was  heard  distinct  to  say. 

"True  Courtship  is  life's  cream. 
And  love  will  find  its  way." 

They  listening,  gathered  'round, 
And  said,  "  What  is't  you  say  ?" 

Out  flew  on  wings  of  sound, 
"Sure,  love  will  find  its  way." 

O,  pleasant  was  that  dream, 

It  was  the  first  of  May  : 
Well  launched  on  life's  young  stream, 
Her  countenance  a-bcam, 

Said,  "  Love  will  find  its  way." 

And  blest  that  happy  youth, 
Who  hears,  his  heart  to  stay, 

From  Fanny's  lips,  the  truth, 
"  To  you  love  finds  its  way." 


"Bright  is  the  froth  of  an  eastern  wave, 

As  it  plays  in  the  sun's  last  glow  ; 
i/We  is  the  pearl  in  its  crystal  bed, 

Gemming  the  worlds  below  ; 
Warm  is  the  heart  that  mingles  its  blood 

In  the  red  tide  of  Glory's  stream  ; 
But  more  flashingly  bright,  more  pure,  more  warm, 

Is  '  Love's  first  dream.' 

Hope  paints  the  vision  with  hues  of  her  own, 

In  all  the  colors  of  Spring, 
While  the  young  lip  breathes  like  a  dewy  rose 

Fanned  by  the  fire-fly's  wing. 


LOVE. 

Tis  a  fairy  scene,  where  the  fond  soul  roves, 
Exulting  in  passion's  warm  beam  ; 

Ah,  sad  'tis  to  think  we  should  wake  with  a  chill, 
From  *  Love's  first  dream.' 

But  it  fades  like  the  rainbow's  brilliant  arch, 

Scattered  by  clouds  and  wind  ; 
Leaving  the  spirit,  unrobed  of  light, 

In  darkness  and  tears  behind. 
When  mortals  look  back  on  the  heartfelt  woes, 

They  have  met  with  in  life's  rough  stream, 
That  sight  is  oft  deepest  which  memory  gives 

To  '  Love's  first  dream.'  " 


There  was  a  time,  fond  girl,  when  you 

Were  partial  to  caresses  : 
Before  your  graceful  figure  grew 

Too  tall  for  ankle  dresses  ; 
\Vhen  "  Keys  and  Pillows,"  and  the  rest 

Of  sentimental  pastimes, 
Were  thought  to  be  the  very  best 

Amusement  out  of  class-times. 

You  wore  your  nut-brown  hair  in  curls 

That  reached  beyond  your  bodice, 
Quite  in  the  style  of  other  girls — 

But  you  I  thought  a  goddess  ! 
I  wrote  you  letters,  long  and  short> 

How  many  there's  no  telling  ! 
Imagination  was  my  forte! 

I  can't  say  that  of  spelling  ' 

We  shared  our  sticks  of  chewing-gum, 
Our  precious  bits  of  candy  ; 


45 


PROPOSAL  AND   ESPOUSAL. 

Together  solved  the  knotty  sum, 

And  learned  the  ars  amandi. 
Whene'er  you  wept,  a  woful  lump 

Stuck  in  my  throat,  delayed  there  ! 
My  sympathetic  heart  would  jump— 

I  wondered  how  it  stayed  there ! 

We  meet  to-day — we  meet,  alas  ! 

With  salutation  formal  ; 
I'm  in  the  college  senior  class, 

You  study  at  the  Normal. 
And  as  \ve  part,  I  think  again, 

And  sadly  wonder  whether 
You  wish,  as  I,  we  loved  as  when 

We  sat  at  school  together  ! — Century  Bric-Brac. 


BELIEVE     ME. 
Believe  me,  if  all  those  endearing  young  charms, 

Which  I  gaze  on  so  fondly  to-day, 
Were  to  change  by  to-morrow,  and  fleet  in  my  arms, 

Like  fairy  gifts  fading  away  ; 
Thou  wouldst  still  be  ador'd,  as  this  moment  thou  art, 

Let  thy  loveliness  fade  as  it  will, 
And  around  the  dear  ruins  each  wish  of  my  heart 

Would  entwine  itself  verdantly  still. 

It  is  not  while  beauty  and  youth  are  thy  own, 

And  thy  cheeks  unprofaned  by  a  tear, 
That  the  fervor  and  faith  of  a  soul  can  be  known, 

To  which  time  will  but  make  thee  more  dear. 
Oh !  the  heart  that  has  truly  lov'd,  never  forgets, 

And  as  truly  loves  on  to  the  close  ; 
As  the  sunflower  turns  on  her  god,  when  he  sets, 

The  same  look  which  she  turn'd  when  he  rose." 


LOVE.  47 


LOVE  AND  LOVE, 

"There  s  a  love  that  only  lives 

While  the  cheek  is  fresh  and  red  ; 
There's  a  love  that  only  thrives 

Where  the  pleasure-feast  is  spread 
It  burneth  sweet  and  strong, 

And  it  sings  a  merry  theme, 
But  the  incense  and  the  song 

Pass  like  flies  upon  the  stream. 
It  cometh  with  the  ray, 

And  it  goeth  with  the  cloud, 
And  quite  forgets  to-day 

WThat  yesterday  it  vowed. 
Oh,  Love  !  Love  !  Love  ! 

Is  an  easy  chain  to  wear 
When  many  idols  meet  our  faith, 

And  all  we  serve  are  fair. 

But  there's  a  love  that  keeps 

A  constant  watch-fire  .light ; 
WTith  a  flame  that  never  sleeps 

Through  the  longest  winter  night 
It  is  not  always  wise, 

And  it  is  not  always  blest ; 
For  it  bringeth  tearful  eyes, 

And  it  loads  a  sighing  breast. 
A  fairer  lot  hath  he 

Who  loves  awhile,  then  goes, 
Like  the  linnet  from  the  tree, 

Or  the  wild  bee  from  the  rose. 
Oh,  Love  !  Love  !  Love  ! 

Soon  makes  the  hair  turn  grey  ; 
When  only  one  fills  all  the  heart, 

And  that  one's  far  away." 


4$  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

Love  that  has  nothing  but  beauty  to  keep  it  in  good  health,  is 
short  lived,  and  subject  to  ague  fits. — Erasmus. 

As  love  without  esteem  is  volatile  and  capricious,  esteem  with 
out  love  is  languid  and  cold. — Johnson. 

"Never  forget  our  loves — but  always  cling 
To  the  fixed  hope — that  there  will  be  a  time — 
When  we  can  meet — unfetter'd — and  be  blest — 
With  the  full  happiness — of  certain  love." 


"  Let  conquerors — boast 

Their  fields  of  fame  ;  he,  who  in  virtue,  arms 
A  young,  warm  spirit — against  beauty's  charms, 
Who  feels  her  brightness,  yet  defies  her  thrall, 
Is  the  best,  bravest  conqueror  of  them  all." 


TIIK     PROGRESS     OF     LIFE. 

"I  dreamed — I  saw  a  little  rosy  child, 

With  flaxen  ringlets — in  a  garden  playing 
Now  stopping  here,  and  then  afar  off  straying, 

As  flower,  or  butterfly — his  feet  beguiled. 

'Tvvas  changed.     One  summer's  day  I  stcpt  aside 

To  let  him  pass  ;  his  face — and  manhood  seeming 

And  that  full  eye  of  blue — was  fondly  beaming 
On  a  fair  maiden,  whom  he  called,  '  his  Bride  !' 

Once  more  ;  'twas  autumn,  and  the  cheerful  fire 
I  saw  a  group — of  youthful  forms  surrounding 
The  rooms — with  harmless  pleasantry  resounding, 

And,  in  the  midst,  I  marked  the  smiling  Sire. 

The  heavens  were  clouded  !  and  I  heard  the  tone 

Of  a  slow — moving  bell — the  white  haired  man  was  gone." 


LOVE'S     VAGARIES. 


r,  when  this  man  had  held  his  peace,  the  third  of  them, 
who  was  Zorobabel,  began  to  instruct  them  about  wo 
men,  and  about  truth,  who  said  thus :  '  Wine  is  strong, 
as  is  the  king  also,  whom  all  men  obey,  but  women  are 
superior  to  them  in  power  ;  for  it  was  a  woman  that 
brought  the  king  into  the  world  ;  and  for  those  that  plant  the  vines 
and  make  the  wine,  they  are  women  who  bear  them,  and  bring 
them  up  ;  nor,  indeed,  is  there  anything  which  we  do  not  receive 
from  them  ;  for  these  women  weave  garments  for  us,  and  our  house 
hold  affairs  are  by  their  means  taken  care  of  and  preserved  in 
safety.  Nor  can  we  live  separate  from  women  ;  and  when  we  have 
gotten  a  great  deal  of  gold  and  silver,  and  any  other  thing  that  is 
of  great  value,  and  deserving  regard,  and  see  a  beautiful  woman, 
we  leave  all  these  things,  and,  with  open  mouth,  fix  our  eyes  upon 
her  countenance,  and  are  willing  to  forsake  what  we  have,  that  we 
may  enjoy  her  beauty,  and  procure  it  to  ourselves.  We  also  leave 
father  and  mother,  and  the  earth  that  nourishes  us,  and  frequently 
forget  our  dearest  friends,  for  the  sake  of  women  !  Nay,  we  are  so 
hardy  as  to  lay  down  our  lives  for  them  ;  but  what  will  chiefly  make 
you  take  notice  of  the  strength  of  women  is  this  as  follows  :  Do  not 
we  take  pains,  and  endure  a  great  deal  of  trouble,  and  that  both  by 
land  and  sea,  and  when  we  have  procured  somewhat  as  the  fruit  of 
our  labors,  do  we  not  bring  them  to  the  women,  as  to  our  mistresses, 
and  bestow  them  upon  them  ?  Nay,  I  once  saw  the  king,  who  is 
lord  of  so  many  people,  smitten  on  the  face  by  Apame,  the  daugh- 


50  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

ter  of  Rabates  Themasius,  his  concubine,  and  his  diadem  taken  from 
him,  and  put  upon  her  own  head,  while  he  bore  it  patiently  ;  and 
when  she  smiled,  he  smiled,  and  when  she  was  angry,  he  was  sad  ; 
and  according  to  the  change  of  her  passions,  he  flattered  his  wife, 
and  drew  her  to  reconciliation  by  the  great  humiliation  of  himself 
to  her,  if  at  an)-  time  he  saw  her  displeased  at  him." 


LOVE  VERSUS  THE  SHOTGUN. 

A  lover,  threatened  with  a  shotgun,  had  to  postpone  his  court 
ship,  at  Red  Bend,  Washington  Territory,  recently.  It  seems  they 
have  been  having  considerable  trouble  out  there  with  their  lady 
settlers.  Every  grown  lady  in  the  town  was  married  or  engaged, 
and  there  were  over  two  hundred  bachelors  desiring  to  enter  the 
married  state.  They  were  not  able  to  keep  a  school  teacher  or  a 
servant.  Before  they  had  been  in  the  town  a  month  they  were 
married.  One  farmer,  especially,  had  experienced  annoyance  from 
this  cause.  Every  servant  he  engaged  left  him  to  be  married  as 
soon  as  she  learned  the  ways  of  the  household  and  was  becoming 
useful.  It  was  necessary,  however,  to  have  a  servant,  and  he  per 
severed.  At  last  he  became  exasperated,  and  having  secured  a  new 
servant,  he  resolved  to  keep  off  all  lovers.  She  had  not  been  there 
long  before  he  noticed  a  young  man  slinking  around  his  place,  and 
seizing  his  shot  gun,  he  went  out.  "  What  do  you  want  here  ?"  he 
asked.  "  Nothing,"  said  the  fellow,  coloring  up  a  little  ;  "  nothing 
much.  I  was  just  calling  on  the  girl  in  there.  She's  an  old 
friend  of  my  family."  "Well,  I'm  a  friend  of  your  family,  too," 
said  the  farmer,  "  to  the  extent  that  I  don't  want  to  kill  you  ;  but 
if  you  don't  keep  away  from  here  I'll  murder  you."  The  farmer's 
manner  was  so  menacing  that  the  young  man  went  away.  But  a 
few  days  later  the  girl  was  missing,  and  the  farmer  learned  that  she 
and  the  young  man  had  been  married  by  the  justice  that  morning. 
His  opposition  to  the  marriage,  as  the  bride  and  her  predecessors 
doubtless  knew,  was  due  to  regard  for  his  own  inconvenience,  into 


LOVE.  51 

which  the  question  of  their  welfare  did  not  enter  ;  and  as  they  pre 
ferred  marriage  to  a  life  of  servitude,  they  did  not  consider  him. 
It  is  a  pity  that  sinners  do  not  show  the  same  resolution  when  they 
are  urged  to  quit  Satan's  shameful  service,  with  its  dreadful  wages, 
and  defying  his  opposition,  begin  a  life  of  union  with  Christ  (Rom. 
vi.  22-23).—  Christian  Herald. 


\    FAIR    COMPLIMENT. 

Francis  de  Harley,  Archbishop  of  Paris,  under  Louis  XIV.,  was 
remarkably  handsome,  and  affable  in  his  manner.  When  he  was 
appointed  to  his  diocese,  with  several  Duchesses,  who  waited  upon 
him  in  a  body  to  congratulate  him,  was  the  Duchess  [of  Mecklen- 
burgh,  who  addressed  him  in  the  following  words  : — "  Though  the 
weakest,  we  are  the  most  zealous  portion  of  your  flock."  The  Arch 
bishop  answered,  "  I  regard  you  as  the  fairest  portion  of  it."  The 
Duchess  de  Bouillon,  who  understood  Latin,  and  was  well  read  in 
Virgil,  then  repeated  this  line  from  that  poet  :— 

"Formosa  pecoris,  custos  formosior  ipse." 
(Fair  is  the  flock,  the  keeper  fairer  still.) 


JLORD     tfOLINGBROKE'S     CHOICE. 

In  Gay's  time,  there  was  a  young  creature,  known  to  the  world 
by  no  other  title  than  Clara,  who  drew  much  attention  at  that  time 
by  the  sweetness  and  pathos  of  her  tones  ;  but  her  recommendation 
to  particular  notice  was  the  circumstance  of  her  being  for  many 
years  the  object  of  Bolingbroke's  enthusiastic  affection.  The  poor 
girl  strayed  for  some  time,  during  which  his  Lordship  had  not  seen 
her ;  it  was  after  this  interval,  that  meeting  her,  he  addressed  to 
her  the  following  tender  lines,  beginning  :— 

"Dear,  thoughtless  Clara,  to  my  verse  attend, 
Believe  for  once  the  lover  and  the  friend." 
And  concluding  thus  : — 


52  PROPOSAL  AND  ESPOUSAL. 

"To  virtue  thus,  and  to  thyself  restored 
By  all  admired,  by  one  alone  adored  ; 
Be  to  thy  Harry  ever  kind  and  true, 
And  live  for  him  who  more  than  died  for  you." 

A  series  of  calamities  totally  ruined  her  vocal  powers,  and  she 
afterwards  subsisted  by  the  sale  of  oranges  at  the  Court  of  Requests. 


DIED   TO   PROVE    HIS   LOVE. 

The  woman  whom  a  Swiss  wooed  was  ten  years  his  senior,  and 
she  had  a  fortune,  while  he  was  indigent.  Under  these  circum 
stances  she  would  not  believe  that  his  love  was  genuine,  or  his  offer 
of  marriage  disinterested.  In  order  to  convince  her,  he  committed 
suicide  under  her  bedroom  window. 


A    BEESWAX    MARRIAGE   FEE. 

Many  of  the  first  settlers  in  Illinois  were  rude  in  speech  and 
rough  in  manner.  Money  was  scarce  with  them,  and  service  was 
paid  for  in  produce. 

Governor  B—  -^uscd  to  illustrate  these  incidents  of  frontier 
life  by  the  following  anecdote  :— 

One  day  there  came  to  his  office  a  young  man  accompanied  by 
a  young  woman. 

"  Be  you  the  squire?"  asked  the  manly  youth. 

11  Yes,  sir." 

"  Can  you  tie  the  knot  for  us  right  away  ?" 

"  Yes,  sir."  ' 

How  much  do  you  charge  ?" 

"  One  dollar  is  the  legal  fee,  sir." 

"  Will  you  take  your  fee  in  beeswax  ?" 

"  Yes,  if  you  can't  pay  cash." 

"  Well,  go  ahead  and  tie  the  knot,  and  I'll  fetch  in  the  wax." 


LOVE.  53 

"  No,"  said  the  squire,  thinking  there  was  a  good  chance  for  a 
little  fun  ;  "bring  in  the  beeswax  first,  and  then  I'll  marry  you." 

Reluctantly  the  youth  went  out  to  where  was  hitched  the  horse 
upon  which,  Darby  and  Joan  fashion,  they  had  ridden,  and  brought 
the  wax  in  a  sack. 

On  being  weighed,  its  value  was  found  to  be  only  sixty  cents. 

"Wai,"  said  the  anxious  groom,  "tie  the  knot,  and  I'll  fetch 
more  wax  next  week." 

"  No,  sir,  I  don't  trust ;  that  is  against  the  rules  of  this  office." 

Slowly  the  disappointed  youth  turned  to  go  out,  saying— 

"Come,  Sal,  let's  go." 

"I  say,  mister,"  answered  Sal,  with  a  woman's  wit,  "can't  you 
marry  us  as  far  as  the  wax  will  go  ?" 

"  Yes,  I  can,  and  will,"  replied  the  squire,  laughing,  and  he  did. 


NOT    A    FAMILY    MAN. 

A  bachelor,  at  Sidney,  Neb.,  answered  a  matrimonial  adver 
tisement  in  an  Omaha  paper,  a  few  days  ago,  requesting  a  photo 
graph.  The  lady  replied,  sending  not  only  her  own  photograph, 
but  those  of  her  four  children  by  her  first  husband  as  well.  The 
correspondence  stopped  there. 


THE    FICKLE    KNIGHT. 
"Gallant  and  tall,  and  a  soldier  withal, 

Sir  Harry  goes  courting  the  fair  ; 
He  has  burnished  his  curls,  and  his  white  hand  twirls 

Through  the  tresses,  with  tender  care. 
He  is  whispering  low,  but  don't  let  your  hearts  go : 

Maidens,  just  watch,  and  you'll  see, 
That  Sir  Harry  can  smile,  and  mean  nothing  the  while 

For  a  gay  deceiver  is  he. 

Scout  him  and  flout  him,  with  pride  and  with  scorn, 
For  he'll  sue  you,  and  woo  you,  and  leave  you  forlorn. 


54  PROPOSAL  AND   ESPOUSAL. 

He  holds  up  his  head,  and  tells  of  the  dead 

And  the  wounded  his  beauty  has  left, 
Lightly  he'll  boast  of  the  love  smitten  host 

By  his  charms  of  their  peace  bereft. 
Oh  !  heave  not  a  sigh  at  the  blink  of  his  eye, 

Though  melting  its  beam  may  be  ; 
He  seeks  to  entrance  your  soul  at  a  glance, 

But  a  gay  deceiver  is  he. 

Scout  him  and  flout  him — he  worships  a  stone- 
For  the  image  he  dotes  on  is  only  his  own. 

This  gallant  and  gay  Sir  Harry,  they  say, 

Has  reckoned  his  worth  in  gold  ; 
Sir  Harry  is  not  to  be  given  away, 

He's  only  a  thing  to  be  sold. 
Maidens,  don't  fret,  though  his  whiskers  of  jci 

Right  daintily  trimmed  may  be  ; 
Oh  !  give  him  no  part  of  a  woman's  warm  heart, 

For  a  gay  deceiver  is  he. 

Scout  him  and  flout  him  with  pride  and  with  scorn, 
And  leave  him  and  his  beauty  to  live  forlorn. 


LOVE     AND    ROSES. 


Prince  Albert,  at  the  Royal  levee,  received  from 
her  Majesty':1  own  hand  the  rose,  '..vhich  marked  her 
preference  and  sealed  his  betrothal,  the  happy  Ger 
man  Prince  at  once  slit  a  hole  in  the  breast  of  his 
splendid  uniform,  and  inserted  the  star-like  flower  as 
near  his  heart  as  he  could,  while  he  thus  stood  the  envy  of  all  royal 
rivals. 

When  yonng  Alphonso,  of  Spain,  was  courting  his  present  royal 
consort,  he  was  in  constant  communication  with  her,  and  sent  her 
every  day  some  new  and  precious,  and  oftentimes  surprising,  love- 
token,  equally  exquisite  and  emblematical.  On  one  occasion  it 
was  a  brilliant  rose  (love's  chosen  emblem)  on  a  golden  stem,  and 
ablaze  with  jewelled  petals,  with  great  ruby  heart.  At  another 
time  it  was  a  casket  containing  a  silver  egg,  and  disclosing  a  golden 
yolk,  and  ravishingly  unfolding  a  bright,  blazing  diamond — the 
precious  in  the  precious,  and  ever  growing  more  beautiful  and 
delightful. 

The  Pope  (if  we  understand  rightly)  gives  a  golden  rose  annu 
ally  to  any  royal  personage  who  happens,  at  the  period  of  its 
bestowal,  to  be  most  in  favor  at  the  Vatican. 


THREE     ROSES. 

Three  roses,  wan  as  moonlight,  and  weighed  down 
Each  with  its  loveliness,  as  with  a  crown, 
Drooped  in  a  florist's  window  in  a  town. 


56  PROPOSAL    AND    ESPOUSAL. 

The  first  a  lover  bought.      'It  lay  at  rest, 

Like  flower  on  flower,  that  night,  on  Beauty's  breast. 

The  second  rose,  as  virginal  and  fair, 
Shrunk  in  the  tangles  of  a  harlot's  hair. 

The  third  a  widow,  with  new  grief  made  wild, 

Shut  in  the  palm  of  her  dead  child. —  Thomas  Bailey  Aldi  i 


WHAT    THE    FLOWERS    SAY. 

The  red  rose  says,  "  Be  sweet," 

And  the  lily  bids,  "  be  pure," 
The  hardy  brave  chrysanthemum, 

"  Be  patient  and  endure. ' 

The  violet  whispers,  "  Give, 

No  grudge  nor  count  the  cost.'' 
The  woodbine,  "  Keep  on  blossoming 

In  spite  of  chill  and  frost." 

And  so  each  gracious  flower 

Hath  each  a  separate  word, 
Which  read  together,  maketh 

The  message  of  the  Lord, — Susan  Ccolidge. 


JOY      ROSES. 
"Pray  call  me  a  pretty  name,"  said  he, 

One  night  to  his  darling  Carrie, 
The  girl  he  had  courted  so  long  that  she 

Thought  he  never  meant  to  marry. 
Up  from  his  bosom  she  raised  her  head, 

And  her  cheeks  grew  red  as  roses, 
"  1  think  I  will  call  you  '  man,' "  she  said, 
"  For  they  say  that  '  man  proposes.' " 


LOVE.  57 

'The  rose  in  her  cheeks  is  red  to-night, 
Her  eyes  are  filled  with  a  tender  light, 
And  her  heart  brims  over  with  happiness, 
For  her  lover's  proposed,  and  she's  answered  "  Yes." 


FATE   AND   THE    ROSES. 

Roses  gather  but  to  wither, 
Odors  blow  in  summer  weather  ; 
Wealth  finds  wings  of  migrant  feather 
Pleasures  fly  like  bloom  from  heather. 
Heaviness  succeedeth  laughter, 
Joy  finds  grief  come  quickly  after  ; 
Roll  the  years  and  what  is  left  us  ? 
Ruthless  time  has  clean  bereft  us  ; 
In  Jesus,  then,  be  thy  chief  treasure, 
Salvation  knows  nor  time  nor  measure 


THE    LAY   OF   DEATH. 

"I  breathe  in  the  face  of  a  maiden, 
I  kiss  the  soft  mouth  of  a  rose  ; 
Yet  not  that  I  hate  them,  but  love  them, 

My  black  wings  are  spread  forth  above  them. 
And  round  them  my  pinions  enclose. 
I  love  them  so  well  that  they  die, 
Yet  my  heart  with  their  sorrow  is  laden, 
And  sad  with  their  cry. 

Yes,  cruel  my  fate  is  and  bitter, 

That  all  things  that  I  love  should  decay, 
Though  my  fingers  fall  soft  as  the  blossom 
I  pluck,  and  would  place  in  my  bosom, 

The  petals  drop  sadly  away  ; 

Even  gold  in  my  hand  becomes  rust, 
And  no  gems  on  my  forehead  will  glitter, 

But  change  into  dust. 


58  PROPOSAL  AND   ESPOUSAL. 

Yet,  oh  Love  !  thou  art  strong,  I  am  stronger, 

Though  thou  shouldest  strive,  I  p/cvail  ; 
Thy  footstep  is  fleet :  mine  is  fleeter  ; 
Thy  kiss  it  is  sweet :  mine  is  sweeter  ; 

I  whisper  the  tender  tale. 

O  Love,  thy  dart  pierces  my  wing  ; 
Though  thy  reign  may  be  long,  mine  is  longer, 

Lo  !   I  am  king  !" 


THE    TOMB    AND    THE     ROSE. 

The  tomb  says  to  the  rose  above : 
"The  tears  wherewith  the  gloaming  sprinkles 

What  dost  thou  with  them  flower  of  love  ?" 

The  rose  says  to  the  tomb :  "  Tell  me 
What  thou  dost  with  the  many  things  that  fall 
Into  thy  ever-gaping  maw?     Dull  tomb, 

Those  tears  I  transmute  all, 
Honey  and  amber  blending,  to  perfume, 

Amid  the  shade."     "  Sad  plaintive  flower," 
The  tomb  in  turn  replies  : 
"I  make  each  soul  that  comes  within  my  power 

An  angel  for  the  skies." —  Victor  Hugo. 

THE    BITTEREST    ROSES  ;  OR,   ANOTHER'S    ROSE    IS    WORN. 

My  bonds  are  fast,  and  time  has  done 

What  time  can  ne'er  undo  ; 
But  though  the  chain  may  torture  one 

It  shall  not  fetter  two. 

I've  loved  thee  long — I  love  thce  yet 

And  blindly,  fondly  believed 
My  earnest  homage  gladly  met, 

And  tenderly  received. 


LOVE, 

I  thought  thy  smue  s  most  joyous  beam 

Was  kept  for  me  alone, 
And  dared  to  let  my  spirit  dream 

Of  calling  thee  its  own. 

Thou  vvert  the  first  to  hail  and  greet 
My  presence  with  glad  words, 

That  came  as  blithely  and  as  sweel 
As  songs  of  morning  birds. 

But  now  'tis  past — the  cup  of  bliss 

Has  fallen  from  my  lip, 
The  soft  dew  of  thy  honeyed  kiss 

Some  happier  one  will  sip. 


My  flowers  are  lightly  thrown  aside— 

Another's  rose  is  worn, 
My  proffered  vow  now  shades  thy  brow 

With  frown  of  silent  scorn. 

I  breathe  farewell  with  aching  breast— 
My  "Good  night"  still  deferred  ; 

But  while  thy  hand  by  mine  is  pressed, 
No  kindred  pulse  is  stirred. 

My  soul  still  pours  its  incense  firfc 

Upon  thy  cherished  name, 
But  findeth  not  the  altar  spot 

Give  back  one  ray  of  flame. 

I  would  not  breathe  into  thy  ear 

A  murmur  to  reprove  ; 
But  why  didst  thou  once  call  me  "  dear  ?" 

Why  didst  thou  seem  to  love  ? 


60  PROPOSAL  AND   ESPOUSAL. 

Why  didst  thou  fling  upon  my  way 

Hope's  rosebuds  of  Life's  morn, 
With  rich  perfume  ;  then  crush  the  bloom, 

And  leave  but  cloud  and  thorn  ? 

It  may  be  sport  to  thee,  fair  girl-; 

But  promise,  ere  we  part, 
Thou'lt  ne'er  again  weld  such  a  chain, 

Then  spurn  the  captive  heart. 

THE     PLUCKED    ROSE. 
She  plucked  a  rose,  and  idly  pulled 

The  crimson  leaves  apart. 
1  whispered,  "  Tell  me  why  it  is 

That  rose  is  like  my  heart." 
"  What  know  I  of  your  heart  ?"  said  she, 
"  Your  riddle  is  too  deep  for  me." 

"  because  my  heart  was  full  of  hopes, 

As  leaves  upon  your  rose : 
You  scatter  them  from  day  to  day, 

As  now  you  scatter  those  ; 
And  soon  my  poor  heart,  stripped  of  all, 
Forgotten,  as  the  rose,  must  fall." 

Ah!  crimson  cheeks  and  bashful  eyes! 

My  riddle  was  so  plain  ; 
She  stooped  and  gathered  from  the  ground 

The  fragrant  leaves  again. 
"  Ah,  love !"   I  cried,  "  and  can  it  be, 
Sweet  hopes  may  yet  return  to  me  ?" 

THE    LADY    AND    THE    ROSE. 

Eastern  fable  tells  of  a  lady  who  grew  enamored  of  a  beautiful 
rose,  and  she  gazed  with  ceaseless  longing  on  its  surpassing  loveli- 


LOVE.  G I 

ness,  and  sighed  and  wept  over  its  (to  her)  increasing  charms  ;  and 
as  she  did  so  the  glow  of  the  flower  stole  into  her  own  delicate 
face,  and  its  exquisite  odor  perfumed  her  warm  breath,  and  all  its 
fragrance  and  its  beauty  became  her  own.  That  lady  is  the  soul 
of  man,  that  rose  is  the  ''  Rose  of  Sharon  " — Christ  in  the  "  Song 
of  Loves."  That  gaze  is  the  look  of  devotion — earnest  prayer. 
Those  tears  are  the  tears  of  penitence  as  she  looks  on  Him  whom 
she  has  pierced,  and  mourns  for  Him  as  one  mourneth  for  his  only 
son,  and  is  in  bitterness  for  Him,  as  one  that  is  in  bitterness  for  his 
first-born." 

The  Hebrew  mothers,  it  is  said,  had  a  common  superstition  that 
a  child,  by  so  constantly  looking  in  the  face  of  its  nurse,  gradually 
became  like  her  in  feature  and  disposition,  and  hence  they  (when 
practicable)  chose  the  most  comely  of  their  sex  for  the  guardian 
ship  of  their  little  ones. 

This  is  all  true  in  the  realm  of  the  spirit,  or  in  the  kingdom  of 
grace.  "  For  we  all,  with  open  face  beholding,  as  in  a  glass,  (so 
very  clear)  the  glory  of  the  Lord,  are  changed  into  the  same 
image,  from  glory  to  glory,  as  by  the  spirit  of  the  Lord." 


Would  you  find  the  fairest  flower 
That  in  earthly  garden  grows  ? 

Lo !  it  springs  where  wrath-clouds  lower, 
'Tis  sweet  Sharon's  blooming  rose. 

Would  you  smell  the  choicest  odor, 
(Free  to  every  wind  that  blows  ?) 

See  !  it  grows  on  heaven's  border, 
'Tis  the  deathless  Sharon's  rose. 


LOVE    AND    LILIES. 


LILY-CUP  was  growing,  where  the  streamlet  tide  was 

flowing, 

And  rich  with  grace  and  beauty  there  it  bent  ; 
And  passed  the  whole  day  long  in  dancing  to  the  song, 

Which  gurgling  ripples  murmured  as  they  went. 
Though  rush  and  weed  were  there,  the  place  was  fresh  and  fair, 

And  wavelets  kissed  the  lily's  tender  leaf  ; 

The  lily  wooed  the  water,  and  drank  the  draught  it  brought  her, 
And  never  wore  a  tint  of  blighting  grief. 

A  strong  hand  came  and  took  the  lily  from  the  brook, 

And  placed  it  in  a  painted  vase  of  clay  ; 
But,  ah  !  it  might  not  be,  and  sad  it  was  to  see 

The  suffering  lily  fade  and  pine  away. 
The  fountain  drops  of  wealth  ne'er  nursed  it  into  health  • 

It  never  danced  beneath  the  lighted  dome  ; 
But  wofully  it  sighed  for  the  streamlet's  gushing  tide, 

And  drooped  in  pain  to  miss  its  far  off  home. 

Now  human  hearts,  be  true,  and  tell  me,  are  not  you 

Too  often  taken,  like  the  gentle  flower  ; 
And  do  ye  never  grieve,  when  fortune  bids  yc  leave 

Affection's  life-stream  for  a  gilded  bower  ? 
Oh  !  many  a  one  can  look  far  back  on  some  sweet  brook 

That  fed  their  soul  bloom,  fresh,  and  pure  and  shining  ; 
And  many  a  one  will  say,  some  painted  vase  of  clay 

Has  held  their  spirit,  like  the  lily,  pining." 

62 


She  sits  oh  the  shore  of  the  summer  sea, 
And  waits  in  sweet  expectancy; 
Though  times  may  change  and  tide1'  may  roll 
One  thought  alone  absorbs  her  soul. 


LOVE.  63 

\VIIICII    IS    FAIREST. 

What's  the  fairest  flower  that  blows  ? 
Shall  we  say  the  crimson  rose, 
With  her  passion  and  her  pain, 
Drenched,  for  tears,  in  summer  rain. 
Or,  when  sunlight  fills  her  cup, 
Offering  joy's  incense  up 
To  the  Beauty-giver  high  ? 
Crown  her  fairest  ?     Nay,  not  I. 

\Vhat,  then,  is  the  fairest  flower  ? 
Wild  rose,  blushing  in  her  bower, 
Childhood's  emblem  fresh  and  free, 
Full  of  shy  simplicity. 
Vanishing  like  childhood,  too, 
Quickly  as  the  morning  dew 
When  the  hours  lead  on  the  day  ? 
Do  we  hold  her  dearest  ?     Nay. 

Lilies  from  some  woodland  nook, 
Where  but  few  e'er  come  to  look  ? 
Golden  bells  that  tell  the  hour, 
From  their  lofty  steeple  tower, 
For  the  fays  among  the  ferns, 
Or  upright  with  rose  red  urns, 
Type  of  mirth  Arcadian, 
Dear  unto  the  heart  of  Pan  ? 

Nay,  not  ye,  though  fair  ye  are, 

Beauty's  he  ven  a  brighter  star 

Holds  enshrined.     For  purity 

Thou  my  saint  and  queen  shalt  be 

Water-lily,  pure  and  strong, 

Clean  from  every  thought  of  wrong, 

Half  of  earth  and  half  of  heaven, 

Unto  thee  the  crown  be  given. — Boston  Transcript. 


LOVE    AND    NIGHTINGALES. 


^f^cIljPjlj^E  were  now  arrived  at  Spring  Garden,  which  is  cxquis- 

O^-;^llIlW£? 

itely  pleasant  at  this  time  of  year.  When  I  considered 
the  fragrance  of  the  walks  and  bowers,  with  the  choirs  of 
birds  that  sung  upon  the  trees,  and  the  loose  tribe  of 
people  that  walked  under  their  shades,  I  could  not  but 
look  upon  the  place  as  a  kind  of  Mahometan  paradise.  Sir  Roger 
told  me  it  put  him  in  mind  of  a  little  coppice  by  his  house  in  the 
country,  which  his  chaplain  used  to  call  an  aviary  of  nightingales. 
"You  must  understand,"  says  the  knight,  "there  is  nothing  in  the 
world  that  pleases  a  man  in  love  so  much  as  your  nightingale.  Ah, 
Mr.  Spectator !  the  many  moonlight  nights  that  I  have  walked  by 
myself,  and  thought  on  the  widow  by  the  music  of  the  nightingale!" 
He  here  fetched  a  deep  sigh,  and  was  falling  into  a  fit  of  musing, 
when  a  mask,  who  came  behind  him,  gave  him  a  gentle  tap  upon 
the  shoulder,  and  asked  him  if  he  would  drink  a  bottle  of  mead 
with  her?  But  the  knight,  being  startled  at  so  unexpected  fami  - 
iarity,  and  displeased  to  be  interrupted  in  his  thoughts  of  the  widow, 
told  her  she  was  a  wanton  baggage,  and  bid  her  go  about  her 
business. 

We  concluded  our  walk  with  a  glass  of  Burton  ale  and  a  slice 
of  hung  beef.  When  we  had  done  eating  ourselves,  the  knight 
called  a  waiter  to  him,  and  bid  him  carry  the  remainder  to  the 

waterman  that  had  but  one  leg.     I  perceived  the  fellow  stared  upon 

61 


LOVE. 


him  at  the   oddncss  of  the   message,  and  was  going  to  be  saucy  ; 

upon   which   I   ratified   the  knight's  commands  with  a  peremptory 
look. 

As  we  were  going  out  of  the  garden,  my  old  friend,  think 
ing  himself  obliged,  as  a  member  of  the  quorum,  to  animad 
vert  upon  the  morals  of  the  place,  tolcl  the  mistress  of  the  house, 
who  sat  at  the  bar,  that  he  would  be  a  better  customer  to  her  gar 
den,  if  there  were  more  nightingales  and  fewer  bad  characters.— 
Addison,  in  "  Sir  Roger  de  Coverly" 

Love,  like  the  nightingale,  is  partial  to  the  shade, 

And  ever  sings  the  sweetest  beneath  the  silver  moon, 
Her  music  wakes  the  silence  in  vale  and  lowly  glade, 

And  makes  the  gladdest  echoes  when  night  is  at  its  noon. 
Love,  like  the  nightingale,  prefers  to  voice  unseen, 

And  comes  into  her  garden  to  sing  of  one  alone  : 
The  stars  look  down  and  listen,  the  dew-drops  brightly  glisten, 

And  earth  forgets  her  sadness,  and  sorrow  stills  her  moan. 
Love,  like  the  nightingale,  brings  summer  on  her  wing, 

And  waiteth  for  the  twilight,  with  cooling  airs  and  balm  : 
And  happy  he  that  hears  her—  she  queen,  and  he  is  king— 

His  life  is  one  glad  anthem,  and  every  sound  a  psalm. 


A 


FALSK  LIGHTS. 


The  night  has  a  thousand  eyes, 

The  day  but  one  ; 
Vet  the  light  of  a  whole  world  dies, 

With  the  setting  sun. 
The  mind  has  a  thousand  eyes, 

The  heart  but  one  ; 
Vet  the  life  of  a  whole  life  dies, 

When  love  is  clone. 

casts  such  a  glamour  or  meteor-glare  over  its  object, 
1—       that  ii  is  next  to  impossible  to  see  that  object  in  its  true 
*{*^k         light,  even  as  it  is  difficult  to  discern  colors  by  artificial 
b:i     brightness.     Nay,  in  the  vain  brilliancy  of  this  sentimcn- 
'V(J)'"'      tal  lustre,  even  defects  themselves  assume  the  semblance 
of  beauties,  and  grave  faults  are  brightened  into  excellent  virtues. 
And  the  love-smitten  maiden,  of  whom  we  have  read,  had  at  least 
the  tender  passion,  if  not  more  sober  reason  on  her  side,  when  being 
remonstrated  with  for  marrying  a  man  with  but  one  leg,  she  replied, 
"  I   would   not  have  a  man  with  two  legs,  they  are  so  common." 
And  who  can  read  the  following  lines  without  being  amused  at  the 
wondrously  transforming  power  of  elective  affinity,  which  can  thus 
find  an  argument  for  its  existence   (with  an  additional  embellish 
ment  of  song),  in  the  blemish  of  a  blind  eyeball? 

Though  a  sable  cloud  benight 
One  of  thy  fair  twins  of  light, 
Vet  the  other  brighter  seems 
f6 


LOVE. 

As  't  had  robbed  its  brother's  beams, 
Or  both  lights  to  one  were  run 
Of  two  stars,  now  made  one  sun. 

Cunniner  Archer  !  who  knows  yet 

o  J 

But  thou  wink'st  my  heart  to  hit  ! 
Close  the  other  too,  and  all 
Thee  the  god  of  Love  will  call. 


AN    EFFECT    EFFACED. 

A  barrister,  named  Lee,  was  famous  for  studying  effect  when 
he  pleaded.  On  a  circuit  at  Norwich,  a  brief  was  brought  to  him 
by  the  relatives  of  a  woman  for  breach  of  promise  of  marriage. 
Lee  inquired,  among  other  particulars,  whether  the  woman  was 
handsome.  "  A  most  beautiful  face,"  was  the  answer.  Satisfied ' 
with  this,  he  desired  that  she  should  be  placed  at  the  bar,  imme 
diately  in  front  of  the  jury.  When  he  rose,  he  began  a  most 
pathetic  and  eloquent  address,  directing  the  attention  of  the  jury 
to  the  charms  which  were  placed  in  their  view,  and  painting  in 
glowing  colors  the  guilt  of  the  wretch  who  could  injure  so  much 
beauty.  When  he  perceived  their  feelings  worked  up  to  a  proper 
pitch,  he  sat  down,  under  the  perfect  conviction  that  he  should  ob 
tain  a  verdict.  What,  then,  must  have  been  his  surprise,  when  the 
counsel  retained  by  the  opposite  party  rose  and  observed,  "  that  it 
was  impossible  not  to  assent  to  the  encomiums  which  his  learned 
friend  had  lavished  on  the  face  of  the  plaintiff;  but  he  had  forgot 
ten  to  say  she  had  a  wooden  leg^  This  fact,  of  which  Lee  was  by 
no  means  aware,  was  established,  to  his  utter  confu:  ion.  His  elo 
quence  was  thrown  away  ;  and  the  jury,  who  felt  ashamed  of  the 
effect  it  had  produced  upon  them,  instantly  gave  a  verdict  against 
his  client. 


68  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

ONE    LEG    AND    BENEVOLENCE. 

"  We  were  no  sooner  come  to  the  Temple  stairs,  but  we  were 
surrounded  with  a  crowd  of  watermen,  offering  their  respective  ser 
vices.  Sir  Roger,  after  having  looked  about  him  very  attentively, 
spied  one  with  a  wooden  leg,  and  immediately  gave  him  orders  to 
get  his  boat  ready.  As  we  were  walking  towards  it,  '  You  must 
know,'  says  Sir  Roger,  '  I  never  make  use  of  anybody  to  row  me 
that  has  not  either  lost  a  leg  or  an  arm.  I  would  rather  bate  him 
a  few  strokes  of  his  oar  than  not  employ  an  honest  man  that  has 
been  wounded  in  the  Queen's  service.  If  I  was  a  lord  or  a  bishop, 
and  kept  a  barge,  I  would  not  put  a  fellow  in  my  livery  that  had 
not  a  wooden  leg.'  " — Addison,  in  ''  Sir  Roger  de  Covcrly" 


LOVE'S    IDOLATRIES. 

Doubtless  a  great  deal  of  love  existing  between  the  sexes  is  lit 
tle  better  than  downright  idolatry,  being  a  positive  breach  of  the 
first  commandment.  If  not,  why  have  we  so  many  wrecks  among 
us  of  love  lorn  humanity,  of  both  sexes  ?  The  affections  having 
lost  their  sober  poise,  sometimes  the  intellect  itself  becomes  de 
ranged,  and  the  wits  are  lost  along  with  the  unbalanced  moral  nature. 
We  should  never  so  commit  ourselves  to  the  keeping  or  to  the 
power  of  the  creature,  as  to  lose  ou»-  chiefest  hold  of  the  Creator, 
This  would  then  be  the  best  corrective  to  our  too-restive  passions, 
and  prevent  the  bitterness  that  must  inevitably  follow  a  disap 
pointed,  inordinate  desire. 


§ 


LOVE    AND    THE    TELEPHONE. 


1872,  Dr.  Bell  had  a  private  school  for  deaf  mutes  in 
Boston.  Among  his  pupils  was  Howard  Glyndon. 
who  is  well  known  in  literary  circles.  One  clay,  while 
this  lady  was  walking,  she  noticed  that  whenever  street 
cars  were  passing,  and  the  muff  in  which  her  hands  were 
placed  was  pressed  against  her  body,  she  experienced 
peculiar  vibrations.  On  informing  Dr.  Bell  of  her  sensations,  he 
constructed  what  he  called  a  sound-box,  having  drum-shaped  heads, 
which  was  to  be  worn  in  front,  under  the  clothing.  Dr.  Bell  ex 
perimented  with  sound  boxes  till  he  struck  upon  a  new  idea.  This 
idea  excited  him  very  much,  caused  him  to  work  sometimes  all 
night,  and  at  length  resulted  in  the  telephone.  Dr.  Bell  now  needed 
capital  to  push  his  idea.  He  was  poor,  having  nothing  but  his  sal 
ary  as  teacher.  The  way  the  Bell  telephone  became  a  success  was 
due  to  causes  wholly  outside  of  its  own  merits.  Gardiner  Green 
Hubbard,  of  Cambridge,  Mass.,  had  a  deaf-mute  daughter  at  school 
in  Germany.  Becoming  dissatisfied  with  her  progress,  he  had  her 
come  home,  and  employed  Dr.  Bell  to  teach  her.  The  young  lady 
was  very  Movable,  and  Dr.  Bell  soon  discovered  that  the  feeling  he 
he  had  for  her  was  very  different  from  the  ordinary  feeling  existing 
between  teacher  and  pupil.  He  felt  compelled  by  honor  to  resign 
his  position,  which  he  did.  But  the  mischief  was  done.  The  affec 
tion  was  mutual.  At  first  the  young  lady's  parents  opposed  the 
union,  but  when  they  found  their  daughter's  happiness  at  stake  they 
gracefully  surrendered.  Dr.  Bell  had  won  a  charming  wife,  and 
obtained  as  father-in-law  a  wealthy  business  man.  Gardiner  Hub- 
bard  had  every  inducement  to  push  the  telephone.  From  this  time 

on  it  was  a  success. — Chicago  Tribune. 

69 


LOVE  THE  MEASURE  OF  THE  MAN, 


My  love  is  my  weight.-- AUGUSTINE. 


£  measure  and  original  of  all  passions  is  love  ;  and  the 
object  of  love   is   that   which  is  really  or  apparently 
good.      If  our  love  be  right  it  regulates  all  our  passions  ; 
for  discontent  or  impatience   ariseth  from  the  absence 
of  somewhat  that  we  love  or  value  ;  and,  according  to  the 
%r        measure  of  our  love  to  the  thing  we  want,  such  is  the  meas 
ure  of  our  discontent  or  impatience  under  the  want  of  it. 

He  that  sets  his  love  upon  that,  which  the  more  he  loves,  the 
more  he  enjoys,  is  sure  to  avoid  the  danger  of  discontent  or  impa 
tience,  because  he  cannot  want  that  which  he  loves  ;  and  though 
he  loves  something  else  that  may  be  lost,  yet,  under  that  loss,  he 
is  not  obnoxious  to  much  impatience  or  discontent,  because  he  is 
sure  to  retain  that  which  he  most  values  or  affects,  which  will  an 
swer  and  supply  lesser  wants  with  a  great  advantage.  The  great 
est  bent  and  portion  of  his  love  is  laid  out  in  what  he  is  sure  to 
enjoy  ;  and  it  is  but  a  small  portion  of  love  that  is  left  for  the  thing 
he  is  deprived  of,  and  consequently  his  discontent  but  little,  and 
cured  with  the  fruition  of  a  more  valuable  good. 

He  that  sets  his  love  upon  the  creature,  or  any  result  from  it, 
as  honor,  wealth,  reputation,  power,  wife,  children,  friends,  cannot 
possibly  avoid  discontent  or  impatience  ;  for  they  are  mutable,  un 
certain,  unsatisfactory  goods,  subject  to  casualties  ;  and  according 

70 


LOVE. 

to  the  measure  of  his  love  to  them,  is  the  measure  of  his  discontent 
and  impatience  in  the  loss  of  them,  or  disappointment  in  them. 

He  that  sets  his  love  upon  God,  the  more  he  loves  him,  the 
more  he  enjoys  of  him.  In  other  things,  the  greatest  danger  of 
disappointment,  and  consequently  of  impatience,  is  when  he  loves 
them  best ;  but  the  more  love  we  bear  to  God  the  more  love  he 
returns  to  us,  and  communicates  his  goodness  the  more  freely  to 
us.  Therefore  we  are  certain  that  we  cannot  be  disappointed,  nor, 
consequently,  have  any  ground  of  impatience  or  discontent,  in  that 
which  is  our  unum  magnum,  the  thing  we  chiefly  value. 

He  that  sets  his  entirest  love  on  God,  yet  hath  a  liberty  to  issue 
a  subordinate  portion  of  love  to  other  good  things,  as  health,  peace, 
opportunities  to  do  good  ;  wife,  children,  friends  ;  and  in  these  he 
may  be  crossed  and  disappointed.  But  the  predominant  love  of 
God  delivers  the  soul  from  discontent  and  impatience,  even  under 
these  losses. 

1.  Because  the  soul   is  still  assured  of  what  it  most  values,  the 
love  of  God  returned  to  the  soul,  which  compensates   and  drowns 
the  other  loss,  and  the  discontent  that  may  arise  upon  it. 

2.  Because  the  heart  is  satisfied  that  these  losses  come  from  the 
hand  of  him  whom  he  loves,  of  whose  truth,  wisdom,  love  and  good 
ness,  he  hath  assurance,  and  therefore  will  be  delivered  out  in  meas 
ure,  upon    most  just  grounds,   and  for  most  excellent   ends. 
sends  an  instruction  along  with  his  rod,  and  the  soul  reads  love  as 
well  in  the  rod  of  God  as  in  his  staff. 

3.  Because  the  love  of  God,  taking  up  the  principal  bent  and 
strength  of  the  soul,  leaves  but  a  gentle  and  moderate  affection  to 
the  things  it  loseth,  and  consequently  a  gentle  and   easy  parting 
with  them,  or  being  without  them.     The  great  tumult  and  disorder 
that  is  made  in  the  mind  upon  the  losses,  crosses,  or  discontents,  is 
not  so  much  from  the  intrinsical  value  of  the  things  themselves,  but 
from  the  estimation  that  is  put  upon  them  ;  were  the  love  to  them 
no  more  than  they  deserve,  the  discontent   and  impatience  in  the 


72  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

loss  would  be  very  little.  Our  chicfest  iove,  when  it  is  placed  upon 
God,  is  placed  where  it  should  be  ;  and  the  mind  is  then  in  its  right 
frame  and  temper,  and  dispenseth  its  love  toother  things  regularly, 
and  orderly,  and  proportionably  to  their  worth  ;  and  thereby  the 
discontent  or  trouble  that  ariscth  upon  their  lessor  disappointment, 
is  weighed  out  according  to  their  true  value,  agreeable  to  the  just 
measure  of  reason  and  prudence  :  but  when  our  love  is  out  of  its 
place,  it  becomes  immoderate  and  disorderly  ;  and  consequently, 
the  discontents  that  arise  upon  disappointments  in  the  things 
we  immoderately  love,  become  immoderate,  exorbitant  discontents, 
impatience,  and  perturbation  of  mind. 

4.  Our  love  to  God  brings  us  to  a  free  resignation  of  our  will  to 
his  ;  for  we  therefore  love  him,  because  we  conclude  him  most  wise, 
most  bountiful,  most  merciful,  most  just,  most  perfect  ;  and  there 
fore  must  of  necessity  conclude  that  his  will  is  the  best  will,  and  fit 
to  be  the  measure  and  rule  of  ours,  and  not  ours  of  his  ;  and  inas 
much  as  we  conclude  that  no  loss  _or  cross  bcfals  us  without  his 
will,  we  clo  likewise  conclude  that  it  is  most  fit  to  be  borne:  and 
because  he  never  wills  anything,  but  upon  most  wise  and  just  reas 
ons,  we  conclude  that  surely  there  arc  such  reasons  in  this  dispen 
sation  ;  and  we  study,  and  search,  and  try  whether  we  can  spell  out 
those  reasons  of  his. — Sir  Matthew  Hale. 


LOVES    ESSENCE. 

To  make  love  complete,  two  things  are  required,  according  to 
Aristotle's  description  of  it.  Affectus  cordis  and  effect ns  operis.  The 
inward  affection  of  the  heart,  and  the  outward  manifestation  of  that 
affection  by  our  deed,  as  occasion  is  offered,  in  being  ready  to  our 
power  to  do  him  any  good.  The  heart  is  the  root  of  all  true  love, 
and  we  must  begin  here,  or  else  all  we  do  is  but  lost. — Robert  San 
derson  (16^6.) 


DRY  subject,"  suggests  cne  of  our  fair  readers  ;  "  very 
dry  indeed  ;  almost  dry  enough  to  be  dusty,  in  fact,  and 
one  which  will  tax  the  ingenuity  of  any  writer  to  render 
in  the  least  degree  interesting. "  Too  true,  gentle 
critic,  and  yet  we  trust  it  will  be  found  not  altogether 
devoid  of  general  interest.  If  nothing  else  can  relieve  the  unprom 
ising  and  barren  topic,  we  will  endeavor  to  make,  at  least,  a  chatty 
chapter  ;  and  chat,  after  all,  is  the  cheeriest  part  of  writing  or  dis 
course.  We  intend  to  move  through  these  pages  in  good  company* 
and  brin^-  to  the  aid  of  our  weaker  voice  some  of  the  most  power 
ful  and  convincing  utterances  of  the  present  and  the  past,  or  of 
ancient  and  modern  times. 

We  would,  therefore,  introduce  you  at  once  t-  the  presence  of 
these  nobler  spirits,  whose  counsels  have  (in  some  cases)  for  ages 
won  upon  the  ears  of  the  nations,  and  which  are  at  once  delightful 
and,  I  had  almost  said,  oracular. 

Suffice  it  to  say  that  the  word  "Bachelor"  signifies  an  unmar 
ried  man  ;  and  "  celibate  "  has  the  same  signification,  with  a  touch 
of  additional  dignity  or  smack  of  sacerdotalism  ;  both  of  which  will 
however,  be  used  indifferently  in  these  pages. 

75 


«£.  ^v^£s^^^^^^^^^^  ^^ 


THE     BACHELOR. 


^5  HAVE  no  wife  nor  children,  good   or  bad,  to  provide 
for — a  mere  spectator  of  other  men's  fortunes  and  ad 
ventures,  and  how  they  play  their  parts  ;  which,    me- 
thinks,  are   diversely   presented   unto   me,   as  from  a 
common  theatre  or  scene. — Burton. 

There  is  in  man's  nature  a  secret  inclination  and  motion 
towards  the  love  of  others,  which,  if  it  be  not  spent  upon  one  or  a 
few,  doth  naturally  spread  itself  towards  many,  and  maketh  men 
become  humane  and  charitable. — Bacon. 


I  would  not  waste  my  spring  of  youth 
In  idle  dallance  ;   I  would  plant  rich  seeds 
To  blossom  in  my  manhood,  and  bear  fruit 
When  I  am  old. — Anon. 


"Averse  to  all  the  troubles  of  a  wife, 
Wedlock  he  loathed,  and  led  a  single  life  ; 
But  now  when  loving  age  his  limbs  had  seized, 
Justly  he  wants  whom  he  before  despised  ; 
He  dies,  and  his  remoter  friends 
Share  his  possessions." 


And  serve  him  right. 


76 


BACHELORS.  77 

I  was  ever  of  opinion,  that  the  honest  man  who  married  and 
brought  up  a  large  family,  did  more  service  than  he  who  continued 
single  and  only  talked  of  a  population.  From  this  motive,  I  had 
scarcely  taken  orders  a  year  before  I  began  to  think  seriously  of 
matrimony,  and  chose  my  wife,  as  she  did  her  wedding  gown,  not 
for  a  fine  glossy  surface,  but  for  such  qualities  as  would  wear  well. 
—  Goldsmith. 


If  "the  woman  be  the  glory  ot  the  man,"  as  St.  Paul  well  states, 
where,  let  me  ask,  is  his  glory  who  has  no  wife  to  grace  his  years  ? 
And  if  it  be  true  that,  "  a  virtuous  woman  is  a  crown  to  her  hus 
band,"  is  he  not  crownless  who  lives  alone  ? 


Pope  was  only  twelve  years  of  age  when  he  wrote  the  verses  of 
his  first  knoivn  poem,  containing  the  words  :— 

Then  let  me  live  unseen,  unknown, 

Thus  unlamented  let  me  die  — 
Steal  from  the  world,  and  not  a  stone 

Tell  where  I  lie. 

He  evidently  thought  better  of  it  later  on  in  life,  and  concluded 
that  the  world  and  he  ought  to  live  on  more  intimate  terms,  and 
also  part  better  company.  What  need  to  steal  from  the  world,  if 
you  have  led  an  honest  life  in  it  ?. 


What  sturdy  common  sense  characterized  the  earlier  ages  of 
the  world  in  this  particular?  Did  any  of  the  patriarchs  or  "fathers" 
of  the  sacred  race  live  bachelors  ?  Did  the  antediluvians,  any  of 
them,  remain  single  ?  All  the  way  down  the  genealogical  tree,  from 
Adam  to  Noah,  no  mention  is  made  of  a  solitary  case  of  bachelor 
hood  ;  but  it  is  said  of  them  in  succession,  that  they  lived  so  many 
"years,  and  begat  sons  and  daughters."  Genesis  is  as  ignorant  of 


78  PROPOSAL   AND    ESPOUSAL. 

celibacy  as  it  is  of  protoplasm  ;  and  the  one  had  made  the  world 
just  as  soon  as  the  other.  Think  for  a  moment  what  had  been  the 
result  if  any  of  Noah's  sons  had  been  unmarried  !  Or  if  even  but 
one  of  the  heads  of  the  twelve  tribes  had  lived  a  single  life  !  In  the 
former  case  there  had  been  one  whole  race  fewer  in  the  human 
family,  and  in  the  latter  case,  one  tribe  wanting  in  Israel. 

Why  even  Cain,  himself,  counted  accursed,  dwelling  in  "  the 
land  of  Nod,"  or  Place  of  Wandering,  restless  as  a  "  wild  ass,  used 
to  the  wilderness,  the  range  of  the  mountains  for  her  pasture,  and 
she  going  searching  after  every  green  thing  ;"  Cain,  according  to  his 
own  testimony,  "a  fugitive  and  vagabond  in  the  earth,"  (as  one  has 
said,  a  vagabond  on  his  own  territcry),  he  being  driven  from  the 
pleasant,  fruitful  lands,  called  euphemistically,  "  the  presence  of  the 
Lord,"  still  found  solace  in  the  nuptial  state  ;  took  his  consort  with 
him,  and  called  his  son  Enoch  (rest),  and  builded  a  city,  and  called 
it  after  his  son's  name.  If  a  murderer  may  find  rest  in  the  married 
life,  who  need  despair  ? 


Marriage  is  the  best  aid  to  quietude  and  good  citizenship. 

Now,  Nicanor  abode  in  Jerusalem,  and  did  no  hurt,  but  sent 
away  the  people  that  came  flocking  unto  him.  And  he  would  not 
willingly  have  Judas  out  of  his  sight,  for  he  loved  the  man  from  his 
heart.  He  prayed  him  also  to  take  a  wife,  and  to  beget  children  ; 
so  he  married,  was  quiet,  and  took  part  of  this  life  (lived  together 
with  him;.  —  Apoc. 

—  j@ua  — 

It  is  uncomfortable  to  want  society,  and  unfit  there  should  not 
be  an  increase  of  mankind,  concerning  which  Plato  has  left  these 
wonderful  words  :  "  This  is  the  encouragement  to  marriage,  not 
only  that  the  human  race  may  be  perpetuated,  but  a  man  may 
leave  children's  children  behind  him  when  he  is  gone,  to  serve  God 
in  his  stead." 


BACHELORS.  79 

"  A  help-meet "  means  fit  for  all  the  necessities  and  uses  of  lite, 
and  one  in  whose  society  he  shall  take  delight :  the  best  company 
keeper,  and  not  a  mere  hireling,  as  the  Hebrew  phrase — as  before 
him — imports,  being  in  every  way  answerable  to  him,  fitted  for  him, 
not  only  in  likeness  of  body,  but  of  mind,  disposition  and  affection, 
which  laid  the  foundation  of  perpetual  familiarity  and  friendship. 
She  shall  always  be  ready  to  observe  and  serve  him,  as  to  "  stand 
before  any  one,"  in  the  Hebrew  language,  signifies  to  do  whatever 
is  desired. 

His  heart  is  a  harp  out  of  tune, 

Who,  with  woman  created  to  bless  him, 

Ungrateful  refuses  the  boon, 

Nor  seeks  tender  love  to  caress  him. 

Had  Adam  dealt  Eve  such  disdain, 
When  God  the  first  consort  provided, 

The  race  had  been  made  but  in  vain, 
And  the  doom  of  creation  decided. 

Adopt,  man,  the  course  that  is  best, 

Undreaming  of  marital  trouble  ; 
One  bird  never  yet  built  a  nest," 

And  all  life  in  the  ark  was  saved  double 


__--    


SHALL  BACHELORS  BE  TAXED? 


HERE  is  a  proposition  on  foot  in  several  of  the  Eastern 
States  to  have  laws  passed  taxing  bachelors  a  certain 
sum  each  year.  The  object  is  two-fold,  to  raise  money 
*rom  a  non-producing  class  of  citizens,  and  to  place  bach 
elors  under  a  ban,  and  show  them  that  their  manner  of 
living,  with  no  object  in  vic\v,  is  not  believed  to  be  of  value 
to  a  community.  There  are  two  sides  to  all  questions, 
and  we  do  not  know  which  side  to  take,  and  consequently 
we  will,  as  usual,  straddle  the  fence.  Bachelors,  who  are  such  from 
choice,  will  fight  it  out  on  that  line,  and  claim  that  they  had  rather 
oay  a  reasonable  tax,  or  even  an  exorbitant  tax,  than  to  marry. 
They  will  illustrate  their  position  by  pointing  to  thousands  of  mar 
ried  men  who  would  be  willing  to  pay  their  last  dollar  in  taxes,  if 
they  could  be  placed  back  in  the  ranks  of  bachelors. 

The  bachelors  will  show  that  on  the  average  they  are  happier, 
and  more  free  from  care,  and  enjoy  themselves  better  than  the 
average  married  man,  and  on  that  ground  they  ought  to  be  willing 
to  pay  a  tax.  They  will  show  that  bachelors  are,  as  a  rule,  rotund 
and  jolly,  while  married  men  look  as  though  something  was  eating 
them.  There  may  be  certain  alleged  beauties  about  the  life  of  a 
bachelor  while  he  is  young  and  in  his  prime,  but  when  he  begins 
to  get  old,  and  pains  rack  his  body,  sickness  confines  him  to  his 
lonely  bed,  and  he  has  to  be  assisted  by  strangers  and  hired  help, 
he  will  realize  what  a  fool  he  has  made  of  himself,  and  what  a  fail 
ure  his  life  has  been.  No  wife  or  children  to  minister  to  his  wants, 
the  bachelor  is  a  most  forlorn  object.  It  is  then  that  he  begins  to 
look  careworn,  cross,  and  as  though  something  was  eating  him,  while 

80 


BACHELORS.  8 1 

the  married   man    who   used  to  look    chat   way  is  happy  and  con 
tented.     It  is  better  to  have  some  cares  and  discomforts  as  a  mar 
ried  man  at  the  front  end   of  life,  when  one  can  endure  them  and 
see  a  piece  of  clear  sky  ahead,  than   to   have  a  careless   pic-nic  in 
early  life,  with  a  prospect  of  dark  clouds  all  the  time  after  the  indi 
vidual  becomes    old   enough   to   need   kindly   offices    from  loving 
friends,  instead  of  hiring  somebody  to  be  sorry  for  him  at  so  much 
a  week.     The  most  pitiful  object  in  life  is  a  sick  old  bachelor  at  a 
boarding   house,  a  hotel  or  a  hospital.      It   is   then   that   he  thinks 
over  his  list  of  friends,  male   and  female,  who  have  homes,  and  he 
would  give  the  world  to  be  an  inmate  of  one  of  those  homes.     He 
thinks  of  the  girls  he  might  and  ought  to   have  married  years  ago, 
and  as  a  hired  nurse  brings  him  some  pills  to  take,  he  thinks  how 
much  easier  he  could  take  them  from  the  hands  of  a  loving  wife  or 
daughter.     A  bachelor  with  a  crick  in  his  back  thinks  the  hand  of 
the  hired  nurse  who  rubs  it  is  a  curry  comb,  and  he  thinks  of  some 
soft  hand  he  has  held  in  his,  years  ago.  and  he  would  give  ten  years 
of  his  life  if  he  had  given  to  the  owner  of  that  soft   hand  the  right 
to  rub  the  crick  out  of  his  back,  but  it  is  everlastingly  too  late.      If 
he  went  searching  for  a  wife  now  he  would  have  to  take  one 
was  as  old  and  toothless  as  he  is,  and  her  hand  would  be  so  harsh 
and  bony  that  she  would  produce  two  cricks  in  the  back  where  only 
one  grew  before.     He  realizes  this  when  he  tosses  in  pain ;  and  the 
look  on  his  face  plainly  shows  remorse.     Bachelor  friends  may  make 
formal  calls  on  him  when  he  is  sick,  and  wish  him  a  speedy  cure, 
but  that  kind  of  friendship  does  not  fill  the  bill.      He  dies,  and  the 
bachelor  friends  act  as  bearers  at  his  funeral,  friends  of  other  days 
ride  in  the  carriages  as  mourners,  and  talk  about  the  blank   life  of 
the  deceased,  but   there   are   no  tears,  unless   there  is  a  sister  who 
comes  from  a  distance  to  attend  the  funeral  and  see  about  probating 
the  will.     The  confirmed  bachelor  is  in  hard  luck,  and   perhaps  he 
ought  to  pay  a  tax,  or  license,  and   wear  a  check  on   his   neck,  so 
that  all  may  know  he  is  a  bachelor. — New  York  Sun.          g 


82  PROPOSAL   AND    ESPOUSAL. 

THE    MATRIMONIAL   MARKET. 

However  melancholy  the  reflection,  the  fact  remains  none  the 
less  apparent  that  in  nearly  all  quarters  and  civilized   climes,  there 
has  during  late  years  been  a  stringency  in  the  matrimonial  market 
which  in  France  already  seriously  threatens   the  very  existence  of 
the  nation,  and  in  other  countries  is  fast  becoming- a  serious  enough 
element  to  call  for  special  legislation.     In  the  natural  order  of  things 
the  fact  has  long  been  established  that  the  members  of  the  fair  sex 
greatly  preponderate  in  numbers  over  the  lords  of  creation.     The 
birth  rate,  in  the  first  place,  is   unequal,  and   the  many  subsequent 
dangers  to  which  men  are  subject,  in  war  and  other  like  dangerous 
avocations,  still  further  decimates  this  number.     An  excess  in  the 
direction  intimated   is,  therefore,  but  to  be  expected.     Apart  from 
this,  however,  it  is  now  found   that   young  men    fully  able  to  take 
upon  themselves  household   cares,  refrain   from  so  doing,  and  this 
hitherto   unusual   feature  is   commencing  to   assume   an  aspect  it 
might  almost  be  said  of  vital   importance.     This  "  hanging  back  '' 
clement,  it  would   seem,  is   chiefly  peculiar  to   the   middle  classes, 
and   from    this   the   inference   naturally  arises   that   the   trouble   is 
mainly  traceable  to  the  fact  that   the  "better  half"  portion  of  the 
community  in  such  walks  of  life  are  apt  to  expect  surroundings  and 
comforts  in  their  houses  far  beyond  the  means  of  the  average  clerk 
or  others  of  kindred  professions  to  supply.     On  the  other  hand,  the 
workingman's  wife   in   her   marriage  expects   and   knows  that  she 
will  have  to  prove  a  helpmeet   to  her  partner  in  a  practical  sense, 
while  of  course  among  the  richer  classes  such  considerations  do  not 
hold  a  place.     It  is  this  disregard   of  the  old  time  construction  of 
"helpmeet"  principle  among  the  middle  classes,  that  is  causing  all 
the  trouble,  in   the   opinion  of  those   who  have  given  the  matter 
attention. 


BACHELORS.  $3 

STATISTICS   OF   BACHELORISM. 

A  married  lady  has  favored  us  with  the  following  report : 
Bachelors  henpecked  by  their  housekeepers,  3185  ;  pestered  by 
legacy-hunting  relatives,  1796  ;  devoured  by  ennui  and  selfish  cares, 
2064  ;  troubled  and  tormented  by  nephews  and  nieces  (so  called), 
1883  ;  crabbed,  cross-grained,  and  desolate  in  life's  decline.  5384  ; 
happy,  none. 

MATHEMATICAL   CHANCES, 

Much  as  we  may  dislike  to  thrust  arithmetic  into  the  poetry  of 
love,  we  feel  that  prudent  maidens  will  thank  us  for  reproducing 
certain  statistics  of  marriage  probabilities  prepared  by  an  English 
man  who  is  good  on  figures.  Assuming  a  woman's  chances  of 
achieving  marriage  to  be  one  hundred,  he  reckons  that  if  unmarried 
at  twenty  years  of  age  she  has  lost  fourteen  and  a  half  chances  ;  at 
twenty-five,  fifty-two.  At  thirty  she  may  console  herself  that  there 
are  yet  left  fifteen  and  a  half  chances  ;  at  thirty-five  she  need  not 
abandon  hope,  for  eleven  and  a  half  chances  are  still  hers,  and  even 
away  up  in  the  sixties  she  may  still  confidently  count,  noon  the  one- 
fourth  of  a  chance. 


/:c-:\T/>:x\y:-v^ 

<  xx  4- xx  4,  xx4^^^^ 

xsvx 


NATURE  TEACHING  THE  BACHELOR. 


UT  ask  now  the  beasts,  and  they  shall  teach  thee  ;  and 
the  fowls  of  the  air,  and  they  shall  teach  thee  : 

Or  speak  to  the  earth,  and  it  shall  teach   thee  ;  and 
the  fishes  of  the  sea  shall  declare  unto  thee  — Job. 
Seek  ye  out  of  the  book  of  the  Lord,  and  read  ;  no  one 
of  these  shall  fall,  none  shall  want  her  mate. — Isaiah. 


*  *  "  There,  well-pleased, 

I  might  the  various  polity  survey 

Of  the  mixed  household  kind.     The  careful  hen 

Calls  her  chirping  family  around, 

Fed  and  defended  by  the  fearless  cock, 

Whose  breast  with  ardor  flames  as  on  he  walks 

Graceful,  and  crows  defiance.     In  the  pond 

The  finely  checkered  duck,  before  her  train, 

Rows  garrulous.     The  stately-sailing  swan 

Gives  out  his  snowy  plumage  to  the  gale, 

And,  arching  proud  his  neck,  with  hoary  feet 

Bears  forward  fierce  and  guards  his  osier  isle, 

Protective  of  his  young.     The  turkey  nigh, 

Loud-threatening,  reddens  ;  while  the  peacock  spreads 

His  every-colored  glory  to  the  sun, 

And  swims  in  radiant  majesty  along. 

O'er  the  whole  homely  scene  the  cooing  dove 

Flies  quick  in  amorous  chage,  and  wanton  rolls 

The  glancing  eye  and  turns  the  changeful  neck." 


86  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

Nor  heeds  the  rein,  nor  hears  the  sounding  thong  ; 
Blows  are  not  felt,  but  tossing  high  his  head, 
And  by  the  well-known  joy  to  distant  plains 
Attracted  strong,  all  wild  he  bursts  away. 

Nor  undelighted  by  the  boundless  spring 
Are  the  broad  monsters  of  the  foaming  deep  . 
From  the  deep  ooze  and  gelid  cavern  rous'd, 
They  flounce  and  tumble  in  unwieldy  joy. 
Dire  was  the  strain,  and  dissonant,  to  sing 
The  cruel  raptures  of  the  savage  kind  : 
How  by  this  flame  their  native  wrath  sublim'd, 
They  roam,  amid  the  fury  of  their  heart, 
The  far-resounding  waste  in  fiercer  bands, 
And  growl  their  horrid  loves. 

Still  let  my  song  a  nobler  note  assume, 
And  sing  the  infusive  force  of  Spring  on  man  ; 
When  heaven  and  earth,  as  if  contending,  vie 

To  raise  his  being,  and  serene  his  soul. 
Can  he  forbear  to  join  the  general  smile 
Of  nature?  Can  fierce  passions  vex  his  breast 
While  every  gale  is  peace,  and  every  grove 
Is  melody? 

Then  nature 

Wears  to  the  eye  a  look  of  love  ; 
And  all  the  tumult  of  a  guilty  world, 
Tossed  by  ungenerous  passions,  sinks  away. —  Thompson. 

WINGED 

Hence  the  glossy  kind 
Try  every  winning  way  inventive  love 
Can  dictate,  and  in  courtship  to  their  mates 
Pour  forth  their  little  souls.     First,  wide  around, 


BACHELORS.  87 

With  distant  awe,  in  airy  rings  they  rove, 
Endeavoring  by  a  thousand  tricks  to  catch 
The  cunning,  conscious,  half-averted  glance 
Of  their  regardless  charmer.     Should  she  seem 
Softening,  the  least  approvence  to  bestow, 
Their  colors  burnish,  and  by  hope  inspired, 
They  brisk  advance  ;  then  on  a  sudden  struck, 
Retire  disordered  ;  then  again  approach, 
In  fond  rotation  spread  the  spotted  wing, 
And  shiver  every  feather  with  desire.—  Thompson. 

Shall  things  that  creep,  fly,  mope  or  shine, 

Fulfil  the  great  Creator's  plan, 
And  none  resist  the  will  Divine, 

But  purblind,  erring,  wayward  man  ? 

Leviathan,  with  scaly  mate, 

Rides  plunging  through  the  dread  abyss, 
And  singing  bird,  blind  mole  and  bat 

Find  chief  delight  in  wedded  bliss. 

There's  nothing  made  for  self  alone, 

Each  claims  with  others  kindred  share  — 

From  "  flesh  of  flesh  and  bone  of  bone," 
To  teeming  floods  and  tribes  of  air. 


THK  BACHKLOR  AMONG  HIS  DUMB  FRIENDS. 


(See  Cowper  and  "  Puss,\  his  Pet  Hare.) 


t 

:•(  F^^l  RASML  S   wrote  his   "Praise  of  Folly,"  on  horseback, 
L—  r  while  travelling  through  Italy.    The  Ethiopian  Eunuch 

read  Isaiah,  while  sitting  in  his  chariot,  probably  tour 

ing   amoncr   ludean   hills.      We,  with  less  dignity  of 
^&  <•*  ^   J  t>      j 

travel,  wrote  the  subjoined  poemlets  while  journeying 
on  foot  in  England.  It  was  a  bright  day  —  a  charming  air  —  and  we 
were  strolling  leisurely  along  on  one  of  those  never-to-be-forgotten, 
richly-green,  and  ever-winding  English  lanes,  so  grateful  to  the  eye 
of  both  philosophic  and  devout  contemplation,  and  were  pleasantly 
shut  in  (or  shut  out,  which  you  please)  by  those  beautiful,  embow 
ering  hedges  of  bushy,  blossoming  hawthorn,  in  the  pink-and-snowy 
freshness  of  their  full  May  bloom,  of  which  we  gratefully  sang  : 

The  lane,  the  lane,  the  winding  lane, 

The  ever-green  lane  for  me  ; 
The  glittering  lane,  the  buttercuppcd  lane, 

The  cowslipping  lane  for  me. 

O  all  things  there  arc  pure  and  fair, 

And  beautiful  to  see  : 
The  pheasant  rare,  and  the  darting  hare, 

And  the  milkmaid  from  the  lea. 


BACHELORS.  89 

Sequestered  all  from  great  and  small, 

God's  works  alone  I  know  ; 
The  city's  noise  and  the  worldling's  joys, 

To  me  are  empty  show. 

The  bees  loud  hum,  and  the  birds  sing,  "  come 

And  help  to  swell  the  glee  ;" 
While  the  hedges  green  in  their  summer  sheen, 

Say,  "  all  was  made  for  thee." 

The  daisied  grass,  as  along  I  pass, 

A  welcome  waves  to  me  ; 
And  the  whortled  shell  and  the  pimpernel. 

Cry,  hail !  to  the  waving  tree. 

The  brook  and  rill  from  adown  the  hill, 

Both  hymn  of  the  distant  sea, 
And  onward  glide  to  the  rolling  tide, 

And  beckon  still  to  me  : 

"O  mortal  haste!  no  time  to  waste; 

Life  brooks  of  no  delay  ; 
We  run  alone,  o'er  moss  and  stone, 

As  a  saint  rides  into  day. 

The  lark  on  high  in  the  azure  sky. 

Doth  cheer  me  as  I  go  ; 
And  the  Cuckoo's  note  from  her  egg-cleared  throat 

Sweet-signals  me  below. 

To  other  meads,  my  thought  she  leads, 

Where  wintry  winds  ne'er  blow  ; 
But  God's  own  light  doth  chase  earth's  night, 

And  end  the  reign  of  woe. 

So  on  1  move,  with  the  winds  that  rove, 
And  clouds  that  float  in  light  ; 


9O  PROPOSAL  AND   ESPOUSAL. 

With  my  pilgrim  song,  I'll  march  along 
To  a  home  that's  out  of  si<iht. 

O 

For  life  is  a  lane,  a  turning  lane, 

A  way-hiding  lane  to  me  ; 
A  shady  lane,  a  well-hedged  lane, 

That  windeth  in  mystery. 

Then,  oh,  the  lane,  the  pleasant  lane, 

The  nest-seeking  lane  for  me  ; 
The  primrosed  lane,  the  may-flowered  lane, 

The  love-making  lane  for  me 

As  showing  the  comparative  tamcncss  and  growing  confidence 
of  "  protected  "  animals,  when  enjoying  immunity  from  harm  under 
well-enforced  game  laws,  we  remember  having  seen  in  a  small  field 
by  the  wayside  a  number  of  hares,  pheasants,  and  lambs  with  their 
dams,  all  gently  feeding  together  in  unmolested  quiet,  as  if  antici 
patory  of  the  charming  era  of  the  grand  millenium,  when,  as  saith 
prophecy,  "  nothing  shall  hurt  nor  destroy  in  all  my  holy  mountain." 
And  at  Old  Orchard  Beach,  Maine,  while  strolling  in  a  do£-and- 

o  o 

gun-forbidden  grove,  the  bright  birds  seemed  almost  indifferent  to 
our  approach,  and  a  happy  squirrel  had  the  pleasing  audacity  to 
come  close  up  to  us,  and  glide  over  our  feet,  as  he  played  about  our 
path  with  a  decidedly  friendly  and  not-at-all-afraid  air. 


ODE    TO    THE    CUCKOO. 


Lend  me  your  songs,  ye  nightingales  !     Oh !  pour 
Into  my  verse,  while  I  deduce 
From  the  first  note  the  hollow  cuckoo  sings. 
The  symphony  of  Spring. — Thompson 


IRMAMENT  voyager,  whence  comcst  thou, 
And  what  are  the  tidings  thou  bringest  ? 
The  time  of  thy  coming,  who  taught  thee  to  know, 
As  thy  sun-seeking  way  thou  now  wingest  ? 


Over  seas,  under  skies,  dost  thou  wantoning  roam, 

That  few  of  us  ever  may  see  ; 
But  say,  as  in  brightness  we  welcome  thee  home, 
What  news  dost  thou  carry  with  thee  ? 

We  knew  thee  in  childhood  and  ran  in  to  tell 
Our  parents  that  "  Cuckoo  had  come  ;" 

But  where  are  the  ears  on  which  those  voices  fell  ? 
The  lights  of  that  dear  vanished  home  ? 

Oh,  say,  bird  of  passage,  in  all  thy  long  flight, 
Careering  the  broad  heavens  through, 

Hast  thou  seen  that  dear  sister  that  left  our  sight  ? 
That  father  or  mother  so  true  ? 

They  left  us  with  summer  and  followed  thy  track, 
To  some  far  away  region  in  space  ; 
91 


92  PROPOSAL  AND  ESPOUSAL. 

But,  say,  will  the  absent  ones  ever  come  back  r 
Again  shall  we  see  each  bright  face  ? 

"O,  questioning  mortal  receive  my  reply  : 
There's  nothing  can  perish  that's  true, 
The  holy  and  pure  are  all  hid  in  the  sky, 
And  soon  may  be  greeted  by  you. 

Since  I  left  the  autumn's  sere  leaf  has  been  seen, 
And  winter's  wild  winds  have  swept  o'er, — 

The  spring's  fitful  change — tearful  April  hath  been 
Whilst  that  I  summered  bright  on  yon  shore. 

I  knew  not  the  blasts,  I  saw  not  the  change, 

I  followed  the  sun  on  his  way  ; 
So  these  follow  Jesus,  the  sweet  plains  they  range 

Of  love,  and  of  life,  and  of  day. 

Their  voices,  like  mine,  though  long  silent,  shall  sing, 
When  the  ransomed  of  God  shall  return  ; 

None  aged,  infirm  ;  but  a-flight  on  swift  wing 
To  bid  thee  fore'er  cease  to  mourn. 

I  come  with  this  greeting — the  u-inter  is  past  ; 

I  give  thce  this  signal — the  storms  cannot  last ; 
The  rains  must  waft  over,  and  leave  the  sky  blue  : 

Be  this  voice  sufficient,  Cuckoo,  sweet  Cuckoo." 


1     ~  "7 


AN  AMIABLE  BACHELOR. 


HORACE  WALPOLb. 


ROM  the  age  ot  twenty-five  his  fingers  were  enlarged  and 
deformed  by  chalk  stones,  which  were  discharged  twice 
a  year.  "  I  can  chalk  up  a  score  with  more  rapidity  than 
any  man  in  England,"  was  his  melancholy  jest. 

In  spite  of  all  his  infirmities,  Horace  Walpole  took 
no  care  of  his  health,  as  far  as  out-door  exercise  was  con 
cerned.  His  friends  beheld  him  with  horror  go  out  on  a 
dewy  day  :  he  would  even  step  out  in  his  slippers.  In  his  own 
grounds  he  never  wore  a  hat  :  he  used  to  say,  that  on  his  first  visit 
to  Paris  he  was  ashamed  of  his  effeminacy,  when  he  saw  every 
meagre  little  Frenchman  whom  he  could  have  knocked  down  in  a 
breath  walking  without  a  hat,  which  he  could  not  do  without  a  cer 
tainty  of  taking  the  disease  which  the  Germans  say  is  endemieal 
in  England,  and  which  they  call  to  catch  cold.  The  first  trial,  he 
used  to  tell  his  friends,  cost  him  a  fever,  but  he  got  over  it.  Draughts 
of  air,  damp  rooms,  windows  open  at  his  back,  became  matters  of 
indifference  to  him  after  once  getting  through  the  hardening  pro 
cess.  He  used  even  to  be  vexed  at  the  officious  solicitude  of  friends 
on  this  point,  and  with  half  a  smile  would  say,  "  My  back  is  the 
same  as  my  face,  and  my  neck  is  like  my  nose."  He  regarded  his 
favorite  iced-water  as  a  preservative  to  his  stomach,  which,  he  said, 
would  last  longer  than  his  bones.  He  did  not  take  into  account 

that  the  stomach  is  usually  the  seat  of  the  disease 

93 


94  PROPOSAL   AND    ESPOUSAI 

One  naturally  inquires  why  the  amiable  recluse  never,  in  his 
best  days,  thought  of  marriage  :  a  difficult  question  to  be  answered. 
In  men  of  that  period,  a  dissolute  life,  an  unhappy  connection,  too 
frequently  explained  the  problem.  In  the  case  before  us  no  such 
explanation  can  be  offered.  Horace  Walpole  had  many  votaries, 
many  friends,  several  favorites,  but  no  known  mistress.  The  marks 
of  the  old  bachelor  fastened  early  on  him,  more  especially  after  he 
began  to  be  governed  by  his  valet  de  chambre.  The  notable  per 
sonage  who  ruled  over  the  pliant  Horace  was  a  Swiss,  named 
Colomb.  This  domestic  tyrant  was  despotic  ;  if  Horace  wanted  a 
tree  to  be  felled,  Colomb  opposed  it,  and  the  master  yielded.  Ser 
vants,  in  those  days,  were  intrinsically  the  same  as  in  ours,  but  they 
differed  in  manner.  The  old  familiarity  had  not  gone  out,  but  ex 
isted  as  it  still  does  among  the  French.  Those  who  recollect  Dr. 
Parr  will  remember  how  stern  a  rule  his  factotum  Sam  exercised 
over  him.  Sam  put  down  what  wine  he  chose,  nay,  almost  invited 
the  guests  ;  at  all  events,  he  had  his  favorites  among  them.  And 
in  the  same  way  as  Sam  ruled  at  Hatton,  Colomb  was,  de  facto, 
the  master  of  Strawberry  Hill. 

"His  engaging  manners,"  writes  the  editor  of  Walpoliana,  "and 
gentle,  endearing  affability  to  his  friends,  exceed  all  praise.  Not 
the  smallest  hateur,  or  consciousness  of  rank  or  talent,  appeared  in 
his  familiar  conferences  ;  and  he  was  ever  eager  to  dissipate  any 
constraint  that  might  occur,  as  imposing  a  constraint  upon  himself, 
and  knowing  that  any  such  chain  enfeebles  and  almost  annihilates 
the  mental  powers.  Endued  with  exquisite  sensibility,  his  wit 
never  gave  the  smallest  wound,  even  to  the  grossest  ignorance  of 
the  world,  or  the  most  morbid  hypochondriac  bashfulness." 

He  had,  in  fact,  no  excuse  for  being  doleful  or  morbid.  How 
many  resources  were  his  !  what  an  even  destiny  !  what  prosperous 
fortunes !  what  learned  luxury  he  revelled  in  !  he  was  enabled  to 
"pick  up  all  the  roses  of  science,  and  to  leave  the  thorns  behind." 
To  how  few  of  the  gifted  have  the  means  of  gratification  been  per- 


BACHELORS.  95 

niitted  !  to  how  many  has  hard  work  been  allotted !  Then,  when 
genius  has  been  endowed  with  rank,  with  wealth,  how  often  it  has 
been  degraded  by  excess !  Rochester's  passions  ran  riot  in  one 
century  :  Beckford's  gifts  were  polluted  by  his  vices  in  another— 
signal  landmarks  of  each  age.  But  Horace  Walpole  was  prudent, 
decorous,  even  respectable  :  no  elevated  aspirations,  no  benevolent 
views  ennobled  under  the  petitesse  of  his  nature.  He  had  neither 
genius  nor  romance  :  he  was  even  devoid  of  sentiment  ;  but  he  was 
social  to  all,  neighborly  to  many,  and  attached  to  some  of  his 
fellow-creatures. — Grace  and  Philip  Wharton. 


CELIBATES    FOR   CHRIST'S   SAKE. 

His  disciples  say  unto  him,  If  the  case  of  a  man  be  so  with  his 
wife,  it  is  not  good  to  marry. 

But  he  said  unto  them,  All  men  cannot  receive  this  saying,  save 
they  to  whom  it  is  given. 

For  there  are  some  eunuchs,  which  were  so  born  from  their 
mother's  womb  :  and  there  are  some  eunuchs,  which  were  made 
eunuchs  of  men :  and  there  be  eunuchs,  which  have  made  them 
selves  eunuchs  for  the  kingdom  of  heaven's  sake,  He  that  is  able 
to  receive  it,  let  him  receive  it. 

Neither  let  the  son  of  the  stranger,  that  hath  joined  himself  to 
the  Lord,  speak,  saying.  The  Lord  hath  utterly  separated  me  from 
his  people :  neither  let  the  eunuch  say,  Behold  I  am  a  dry  tree. 

For  thus  saith  the  Lord  unto  the  eunuchs  that  keep  my  sab 
baths,  and  choose  the  things  that  please  me,  and  take  hold  of  my 
covenant ; 

Even  unto  them  will  I  give  in  mine  house  and  within  my  walls 
a  place  and  a  name  better  than  of  sons  and  of  daughters :  I  will 
give  them  an  everlasting  name,  that  shall  not  be  cut  off. 


^ 

;*;\^^ 

x 4- xx -L xx- J. >:>:-, Ux-l-xx-;U >:x4, xx 4< xx-> Uxx-i-:  :A 


TIIK    WISK    BACHELOR. 


PROVIXC,    A    CLAIM. 


CITIZEN  of  Jerusalem,  travelling  through  the  country, 
was  taken  very  sick  at  an  inn.      Feeling  that  he  would 
*f  V  not  recover,  he  sent  for  the  landlord,  and  said  to  him, 

'^  "I  am  going  the  way  of  all  flesh.  If,  after  my  death, 
I'"'  any  party  should  come  from  Jerusalem  and  claim  my 
effects,  do  not  deliver  them  until  he  shall  prove  to  thec  by  three 
wise  acts  that  he  is  entitled  to  them  ;  for  I  charged  my  son  before 
starting  upon  my  way,  that  if  death  befel  he  would  be  obliged  to 
prove  his  wisdom  by  obtaining  my  possessions." 

The  man  died,  and  was  buried  according  to  Jewish  rites,  and 
his  death  was  made  public  that  his  heirs  might  appear.  When  his 
son  learned  of  his  father's  decease  he  started  from  Jerusalem  for 
the  place  where  he  had  died.  Near  the  gates  of  the  city  he  met  a 
man  who  had  a  load  of  wood  for  sale.  This  he  purchased,  and  or 
dered  it  to  be  delivered  at  the  inn  towards  which  he  was  travelling. 
The  man  from  whom  he  bought  it  went  at  once  to  the  inn,  and 
said,  "  Here  is  the  wood." 

"  What  wood  ?"  returned  the  proprietor  ;  "  I  ordered  no  wood." 
"  No,"  said  the  woodcutter,  "  but  the  man  who  follows  me  did  ; 
I  will  enter  and  wait  for  him." 

Thus  the  son  had  provided  for  himself  a  welcome  when  he  should 
reach  the  inn,  which  was  his  first  wise  act. 

The  landlord  said  to  him,  "  Who  art  thou  ?" 


BACHELORS.  97 

"The  son  of  the  merchant  who  died  in  thy  house,"  he  replied. 

They  prepared  for  him  a  dinner,  and  placed  upon  the  table  five 
pigeons  and  a  chicken.  The  master  of  the  house,  his  wife,  two 
sons,  and  two  daughters  sat  with  him  at  the  table. 

"  Serve  the  food,"  said  the  landlord. 

"Nay,"  answered  the  young  man  ;  "thou  art  master,  it  is  thy 
privilege." 

"  I  desire  thee  to  do  this  thing  ;  thou  art  my  guest,  the  merchant's 
son  ;  pray  help  the  food." 

The  young  man  thus  entreated  divided  one  pigeon  between  the 
sons,  another  between  the  two  daughters,  gave  the  third  to  the  man 
and  his  wife,  and  kept  the  other  two  for  himself.  This  was  his 
second  wise  act. 

The  landlord  looked  somewhat  perplexed  at  this  mode  of  dis 
tribution,  but  said  nothing. 

Then  the  merchant's  son  divided  the  chicken.  He  gave  to  the 
landlord  and  his  wife  the  head,  to  the  two  sons  the  legs,  to  the  two 
daughters  the  wings,  and  took  the  body  for  himself.  This  was  his 
third  wise  act. 

The  landlord  said  : 

"  Is  this  the  way  they  do  things  in  thy  country  ?  I  noticed  the 
manner  in  which  thou  didst  apportion  the  pigeons,  but  said  noth 
ing.  But  the  chicken,  my  dear  sir  !  I  must  really  ask  thee  thy 
meaning." 

Then  the  young  man  answered  : 

"  I  told  thee  that  it  was  not  my  place  to  serve  the  food,  never 
theless,  when  thou  didst  insist,  I  did  the  best  I  could,  and  I  think 
I  have  succeeded.  Thyself,  thy  wife,  and  one  pigeon,  make  three  ; 
thy  two  sons  and  one  pigeon  make  three  ;  thy  two  daughters  and 
one  pigeon  make  three  ;  and  myself  and  two  pigeons  make  three 
also.  Therefore  is  it  fairly  as  regards  the  chicken.  I  gave  to  thee 
and  thy  wife  the  head,  because  ye  are  the  head  of  the  family.  I  gave 
to  each  of  thy  sons  a  leg,  because  they  are  the  pillars  of  the  family, 


98  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

preserving  the  family  name.  I  gave  to  each  of  thy  daughters  a 
wing,  because  in  the  usual  course  of  events  they  will  marry,  take 
wing  and  fly  away  from  the  home  nest.  I  took  the  body  of  the 
chicken,  because  it  looks  like  a  ship,  and  in  a  ship  I  came  here,  and 
in  a  ship  1  hope  to  return.  I  am  the  son  of  the  merchant  who 
died  in  thy  house  ;  give  me  the  property  of  my  dead  father." 

"  Take  it,  and  go,"  said  the  landlord,  and  giving  him  his  father's 
possessions,  the  young  man  departed. —  Talmud. 


ANCIENT    PROVERBS    FOR   THE    YOUNG. 
"  Youn£  man,  talk  not  to  me  with  infant  wisdom.      What  arc 

o 

the  sayings  of  the  ancients.  You  ought  to  obey  your  parents. 
Listen  : — '  The  father  and  the  mother  are  the  first  deities  a  child 
has  to  acknowledge.'  Is  it  not  said,  '  Children  who  obey  willingly 
are  as  ambrosia  to  the  gods  '  ?"  "  Were  you  my  friend  you  would 
not  act  thus  ;  because,  as  the  proverb  says,  '  True  friends  have  but 
one  soul  in  two  bodies.'  "  "  I  am  told  you  have  been  trying  to  ruin 
me:  'But  will  the  moon  be  injured  by  the  barking  of  a  dog?'  " 
"  You  have  become  proud,  and  conduct  yourself  like  the  upstart 
who  must  carry  his  silk  umbrella  to  keep  off  the  sun  at  midnight  !" 
"  You  talk  about  your  hopes  of  some  coming  good  :  what  say  the 
ancients?  'Expectation  is  the  mid-day  cream  of  life.'"  "Cease 
to  be  indolent  ;  for,  as  our  fathers  said,  '  idleness  is  the  rust  of  the 
mind.'  " 


A  BACHELOR  BEAU. 


gf  EORGE  Bryan  Brummell,  the  second  son  of  this  worthy 
man,  honored  by  his  birth  the  7th  of  June,  1778.  No 
anecdotes  of  his  childhood  are  preserved,  except  that 
KVJ  he  once  cried  because  he  could  not  eat  any  more  dam- 
£  son  tart.  In  later  years  he  would  probably  have 
thought  damson  tart  "  very  vulgar."  He  first  turns  up  at  Eton 
at  the  age  of  twelve,  and  even  there  commences  his  distinguished 
career,  and  is  known  as  "  Buck  Brummell." 

In  the  life  of  such  a  man  there  could  not,  of  course,  be  much 
striking  incident.  He  lived  for  "  society,"  and  the  whole  of  his 
story  consists  in  his  rise  and  fall  in  that  narrow  world.  Though 
admired  and  sought  after  by  the  women — so  much  so  that  at  his 
death  his  chief  assets  were  locks  of  hair,  the  only  things  he  could 
not  have  turned  into  money — he  never  married.  Wedlock  might 
have  sobered  him,  and  made  him  a  more  sensible,  if  not  more  res 
pectable  member  of  society,  but  his  advances  towards  matrimony 
never  brought  him  to  the  crisis.  He  accounted  for  one  rejection  in 
his  usual  way.  "  What  could  I  do,  my  dear  fella"  he  lisped. 
"  when  I  actually  saw  Lady  Mary  eat  cabbage  ?"  At  another  time 
he  is  said  to  have  induced  some  deluded  young  creature  to  elope 
with  him  from  a  ball-room,  but  managed  the  affair  so  ill,  that  the 
lovers  (?)  were  caught  in  the  next  street,  and  the  affair  came  to  an 
end.  He  wrote  rather  ecstatic  love-letters  to  Lady  Mary  and 

Miss s,  gave  married  ladies  advice  on  the  treatment  of  their 

spouses,  and  was   tender  to  various  widows  ;  but  though  he  went 


100  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

on  in  this  way  through  life,  he  was  never,  it  would  seem,  in  love, 
from  the  mere  fact  that  he  was  incapable  of  passion. 

Perhaps  he  was  too  much  of  a  woman  to  care  much  for  women. 
He  was  certainly  egregiously  effeminate.  About  the  only  creatures 
he  could  love  were  poodles.  When  one  of  his  dogs,  from  over 
feeding,  was  taken  ill,  he  sent  for  two  dog-doctors,  and  consulted 
very  gravely  with  them  on  the  remedies  to  be  applied.  The  canine 
physicians  came  to  the  conclusion  that  she  must  be  bled.  "  Bled  !" 
said  Brummell,  in  horror  ;  "  I  shall  leave  the  room  ;  inform  me 
when  the  operation  is  over."  When  the  dog  died,  he  shed  tears — 
probably  the  only  ones  he  had  shed  since  childhood  :  and  though 
at  that  time  receiving  money  from  many  an  old  friend  in  England, 
complained,  with  touching  melancholy,  "  that  he  had  lost  the  only 
friend  he  had  !"  His  grief  lasted  three  whole  days,  during  which  he 
shut  himself  up,  and  would  sec  no  one  ;  but  we  are  not  told  that  he 
ever  thus  mourned  over  any  human  being. 

The  man  who  could  not  eat  cabbages,  drive  in  a  hackney-coach, 
or  wear  less  than  three  shirts  a  day,  was  now  supported  by  volun 
tary  contributions,  and  did  not  see  anything  derogatory  to  a  gen 
tleman  in  their  acceptance.  If  Brummell  had  now  turned  his  tal 
ents  to  account  ;  if  he  had  practised  his  painting,  in  which  he  was 
not  altogether  despicable  ;  or  his  poetry,  in  which,  he  had  already 
had  some  trifling  success  ;  if  he  had  even  engaged  himself  as  a 
waiter  at  Ouillacq's,  or  given  lessons  in  the  art  of  deportment,  his 
fine  friends  from  town  might  have  cut  him,  but  posterity  would 
have  withheld  its  blame.  He  was  a  beggar  of  the  merriest  kind. 
While  he  wrote  letters  to  friends  in  England,  asking  for  remittan 
ces,  and  describing  his  wretched  condition  on  a  bed  of  straw  and 
eating  bran  bread,  he  had  a  good  barrel  of  Dorchester  ale  in  his 
lodgings,  his  usual  glass  of  maraschino,  and  his  bottle  of  claret  after 
dinner ;  and  though  living  on  charity,  could  order  new  snuff-boxes 
to  add  to  his  collection,  and  new  knick-knacks  to  adorn  his  room. 
There  can  be  no  pity  for  such  a  man,  and  we  have  no  pity  for 


BACHELORS.  IOI 

him,  whatever  the  rest  of  the  world  may  feel.  Nothing  can  be 
more  contemptible  than  the  gradual  downfall  of  the  broken  beau. 
Yet,  if  it  were  doubted  that  his  soul  ever  rose  above  the  collar  of  a 
coat  or  the  brim  of  a  hat,  his  letters  to  Mr.  Raikes  in  the  time  of 
his  poverty  would  settle  the  question.  "  I  heard  of  you  the  other 
day  in  a  waistcoat  that  does  you  considerable  credit,  spick-and-span 
from  Paris,  a  broad  stripe,  salmon-color,  and  cramoise.  Don't  let 
them  laugh  you  into  a  relapse  —  into  the  Gothic  —  as  that  of  your 
former  English  simplicity."—  Grace  and  Philip  Wharton. 


THE   FOP. 

The  city  swarms  intense.      The  public  haunt, 

Full  of  each  theme,  and  warm  with  mixt  discord, 

Hums  indistinct.     The  sons  of  riot  flow 

Down  the  loose  stream  of  false  inchanted  joy, 

To  swift  destruction.     On  the  rankled  soul 

The  gaming  fury  falls  ;  and  in  one  gulf 

Of  total  ruin,  honor,  virtue,  peace, 

Friends,  families,  and  fortune,  headlong  sink. 

Up  springs  the  dance  along  the  lighted  dome, 

Mix'd,  and  evolv'd,  a  thousand  sprightly  ways. 

The  glittering  court  effuses  every  pomp  ; 

The  circle  deepens  :  beam'd  from  gaudy  robes, 

Tapers,  and  sparkling  gems,  and  radient  eyes, 

A  soft  effulgence  o'er  the  palace  waves  : 

While,  a  gay  insect  in  his  summer-shine, 

The  fop,  light-fluttering,  spreads  his  mealy  wings. 

—  Thompson. 


THE    FAMOUS    CELIBATE,    ST.    PAUL. 


IS  bodily  presence,  say  they,  is  weak,  and   his  speech 
contemptible. — Paul's  Enemies. 

Paul's  stature  was  low,  his  body  crooked,  and   his 
head  bald. — Chrysostom. 
lie  was  small,  stooping,  and  rather  inclinable  to  crooked 
ness  ;  pale-faced,  of  an  elderly  look,  bald  on  the  head.      His 
eyes  lively,  keen  and  cheerful,  and  shaded  in  part  by  his  eyebrows, 
which  hung  a  little  over.       His  nose  rather  long,  and  not  ungrace 
fully  bent.     His  beard  pretty  thick  and  of  a  sufficient  length,   and 
like  his  locks,  interspersed  with  grey. — Xicophonis. 


These  are  traditional  accounts,  and  not  much  to  be  relied  on, 
though  probably  they  had  some  foundation  in  truth.  Some  think- 
that  he  had  a  small,  weak  voice,  but  this  also  is  conjecture.  If 
such  had  been  the  case,  we  incline  to  the  opinion  that  he  would 
never  have  been  called  "  Mercurius  (the  god  of  eloquence),  he  being 
the  chief  speaker.  " 

Others  have  been  bold  enough  to  affirm  that  the  Apostle  had  a 
vixenish  wife,  and  that  his  matrimonial  relations  were  the  "  thorn 
in  the  flesh,"  referred  to  by  him.  But  this  idea  receives  no  support 
from  the  truth,  but  contrariwise,  he  says  :  "  I  say  therefore  to  the 
unmarried  and  widows,  It  is  good  for  them  if  they  abide  even  as  I." 

101 


THE      ASCETIC      CELIBATE. 


CIIRYSOSTOM  (GOLDEN  MOUTH.) 


.  CHRYSOSTOM,  to  fit  himself  for  the  ministry,  as 
soon  as  he  became  reader,  retired  into  a  mountain, 
where,  joining  himself  to  a  Syrian  hermit,  he  learned 
austerity,  continence,  chastity  and  mortification  ;  in  this 
*(J  condition  he  spent  four  years,  and  then  to  subdue  the 
lusts  of  the  flesh  more  perfectly,  he  absconded  himself  in  a  desert, 
where  his  lodging  was  no  other  than  the  bare  ground,  his  table  no 
other  than  a  great  stone,  and  his  exercise  nothing  but  reading  and 
studying  the  Scriptures,  and  mastering  his  carnal  desires  and  sen 
sual  appetites. 

And,  indeed,  about  this  time,  A.  D.  390,  these  exercises  began 
to  be  almost  universal,  and  we  that  have  never  used  such  severities 
would  scarcely  believe  that  ever  there  were  such  men,  or  that  they 
did  those  mighty  things  that  are  recorded  of  them  in  history.— 
Anthony  H  or  neck 


Chrysostom  not  unfrequently  illustrates  his  subject  by  an  anec 
dote.  Thus  to  show  how  selfish  men  may  become,  and  how  insen 
sible  in  their  covetousness  to  everything  but  their  own  interests,  he 
narrates  the  following  story  :  "  A  drought  once  overtook  our  city, 
and  all  were  trembling  for  the  last  of  evils,  and  were  beseeching 

1U3 


104  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

God  to  rid  them  of  this  fear.  And  one  might  sec  then  that  which 
was  spoken  of  by  Moses  :  the  heavens  became  brass,  and  a  death, 
of  all  deaths  the  most  horrible,  waited  for  every  day.  But  after 
ward,  when  it  seemed  good  to  the  merciful  God,  beyond  all  expec 
tation,  there  was  wafted  down  from  heaven  a  great  and  plentiful 
rain,  and  thenceforth  all  were  in  holiday  and  feasting,  as  having 
come  up  from  the  very  gates  of  death.  But  in  the  midst  of  so  great 
blessing,  and  the  common  gladness  of  all,  one  of  these  exceeding 
wealthy  people,  with  a  gloor^.-  and  downcast  countenance,  went 
about  quite  dead  with  sorrow  ;  and  when  many  inquired  the  reason 
wherefore,  in  the  common  joy  of  all  men,  he  alone  is  sorrowful,  he 
could  not  even  keep  within  him  this  savage  passion,  but  goaded  by 
the  tyranny  of  the  disease,  he  declared  before  them  all  the  reason. 
'  \Vhy,'  said  he,  'having  in  my  possession  ten  thousand  measures  of 
wheat,  I  have  no  means  of  disposing  of  them  left.'  " 


A    CELIBATE'S    LIBERT7. 

Am  I  not  an  apostle  ?  am  I  not  free  ?  have  I  not  seen  Jesus 
Christ  our  Lord  ?  are  not  ye  my  work  in  the  Lord  ? 

If  I  be  not  an  apostle  unto  others,  yet  doubtless  I  am  to  you  : 
for  the  seal  of  mine  apostlcship  are  ye  in  the  Lord. 

Mine  answer  to  them  that  do  examine  me  is  this  : 

Have  we  not  power  to  eat  and  to  drink  ? 

Have  we  not  power  to  lead  about  a  sister,  a  wife,  as  well  as 
other  apostles,  and  as  the  brethren  of  the  Lord  and  Cephas  ?  —  Paul. 


"Adopt,  man,  the  course  whhh  is  best, 
Undreaming  of  marital  trouble  ; 
One  bird  never  yet  built  a  nest. 
And  all  life  in  the  ark  wan  saved  doubU.' 


BUILD  A  HOME 


AKE  root  somewhere,  fellow  comrade, 

Look  out  for  the  rainy  day  ; 
Don't  float  down  the  stream  with  driftwood, 

'Mong  the  slush  that  floats  away. 
Cease  your  dreaming  of  a  castle, 
With  its  lofty  spires  and  dome, 
Steer  for  some  prolific  harbor, 
Go  to  work  and  build  a  home. 

'Riches  never  come  by  wishing, 

Nor  are  castles  built  of  dreams  ; 
They  are  only  gay  and  dazzling, 

Like  the  bright  sun's  golden  beams. 
Leave  your  wishing,  dreaming,  sailing 

'Mid  the  bubbles  and  the  foam, 
\nd  select  some  spot  that's  pleasant, 

Go  to  work  and  build  a  home. 

"Fast  are  autumn's  days  approaching. 

Down  the  river  lies  the  bay, 
Where  you'll  find  not  many  landings, 

After  youth  has  passed  away  ; 
Then  1  pray  you  take  root  somewhere, 

It  is  time  to  cease  to  roam, 
Say  you  will,  that's  half  the  battle, 

Go  to  work  and  build  a  home." 

105 


106  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

The  French,  it  is  said,  have  no  word  in  their  language  for 
"  Home  ;"  even  as  the  Indians  (and  we  assume  also  that  with  them 
most  of  the  untutored  tribes,)  have  no  equivalent  for  our  English 
"Amen" 

But  this  the  rugged  savage  never  felt, 

Even  desolate  in  crowds  ;  and  thus  his  days 

Roll'd  heavy,  dark,  and  unenjoy'd,  along: 

A  waste  of  time  !  till  INDUSTRY  approach'd, 

And  rous'd  him  from  his  miserable  sloth  ; 

His  faculties  unfolded  ;  pointed  out, 

Where  lavish  Nature  the  directing  hand 

Of  Art  demanded  ;  shovv'd  him  how  to  raise 

His  feeble  force  by  the  mechanic  powers, 

To  dig  the  mineral  from  the  vaulted  earth, 

On  what  to  turn  the  piercing  rage  of  fire, 

On  what  the  torrent,  and  the  gather'd  blast, 

Gave  the  tall  ancient  forest  to  his  axe  ; 

Taught  him  to  chip  the  wood  and  hew  the  stone, 

Till  by  degrees  the  finish'd  fabric  rose  ; 

Tore  from  his  limbs  the  blood-polluted  fur, 

And  wrapt  them  in  the  woolly  vestment  warm, 

Or  bright  in  glossy  silk,  and  flowing  lawn  ; 

With  wholesome  viands  fill'd  his  table,  poured 

The  generous  glass  around,  inspir'd  to  wake 

The  life-refining  soul  of  decent  wit : 

Nor  stopp'd  at  barren  bare  necessity  ; 

Hut  still  advancing  bolder,  led  him  on 

To  pomp,  to  pleasure,  elegance,  and  grace  : 

And,  breathing  high  ambition  thro'  his  soul, 

Set  science,  wisdom,  glory,  in  his  view, 

And  bade  him  be  the  Lord  of  all  below. 

—  Thompson. 


BACHELORS.  IO/ 

HEW   TO   THE   LINE. 
The  glancing  blade  with  a  mellow  ring 
Went  back  and  forth  with  the  hewer's  swing, 
As  it  neared  the  mark  that  straight  and  white, 
Told  where  the  stick  should  be  hewn  aright. 

"  Hew  to  the  line !"  were  the  words  he  heard 
Ere  the  last  chip  flew  like  a  frightened  bird  ; 
Some  tiny  shreds  from  the  narrow  strand, 
And  the  work  was  done  to  the  builder's  hand. 

It  was  simple  all,  but  the  words  were  fine, 
And  an  echo  caught  them,  "  Hew  to  the  line  !" 
Aye,  "  hew  to  the  line,"  in  the  tasks  of  life, 
Let  the  chips  briskly  fly  as  you  wage  the  strife. 

Yes,  work  with  a  will  while  the  arm  is  strong, 
And  the  mark  is  plain  between  right  and  wrong. 
The  boaster  will  rant  and  the  weakling  whine, 
But  strike  a  mark  and  "  hew  to  the  line." 

— Chicago  I  liter- Ocean. 

HOMELESS. 

How  often,  with  regard  to  this  matter  of  "  building  a  home,"  do 
men  (to  quote  the  words  of  an  ancient  sage),  approve  the  better  and 
pursue  the  worse  !  Take,  for  example,  the  case  of  John  Howard 
Paine,  the  author  of  "  Home,  sweet  home,"  as  given  by  some  tour 
istic  reporter  : 

Near  Carthage,  in  a  lonely  spot  rarely  visited,  sleeps  a  wander 
ing  minstrel  of  our  own  times,  whose  one  immortal  song  has  been 
heard  everywhere  the  English  language  is  spoken.  Like  the  roving 
singers  of  lovely  Provence,  many  times  he  had  nothing  but  his 
harp.  John  Howard  Payne  was  a  gay  Bohemian,  extravagant  in 
taste,  lavish  in  expenditure;  living  much,  too  much,  "'mid  pleas 
ures  and  palaces,"  yet  with  a  vein  of  sadness  down  deep  in  his 
heart.  He  died  while  holding  the  office  of  consul,  and  a  plain  mar- 


IOS  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

ble  slab,  sent  out  by  the  Government  of  the  United  States,  marks 
the  grave  of  the  homeless  man,  sixty  years  a  wanderer  on  this  earth, 
the  author  of"  Home,  Sweet  Home."  One  winter  he  was  without 
money  or  credit,  and  in  London  had  not  where  to  lay  his  head.  He 
tried  to  quiet  the  pain  of  hunger  and  homelessness  by  looking  in  at 
windows  and  from  the  areas  scenting  good  cheer.  It  was  Christ 
mas  Eve;  the  snow  fell  fast,  the  wind  was  sharp  and  keen.  At  one 
luxurious  house  the  hungry  man  stopped  and  watched  the  lighting 
of  the  Christmas  tree.  Its  candles  streamed  brightly  on  the  pave 
ment,  and  among  the  evergreens  he  could  sec  the  red  berries  of 
holly,  the  toys  and  garlands,  and  the  pretty  heads  of  children^ 
They  danced  and  clapped  their  hands  while  the  presents  were  dis 
tributed,  and  the  air  rang  with  shouts,  laughter,  and  screams  of 
delight.  When  the  merriment  had  spent  itself  a  little,  one  young 
girl  went  to  the  piano  and  struck  up  "  Sweet  Home,"  while  the 
family  joined  in  a  rousing  chorus.  Was  ever  contrast  so  bitter? 
I  have  this  from  Mrs.  Consul-General  Heap.  Payne  told  it  to  her 
long  after  those  evil  days  were  passed. — Independent. 

It  may  not  be  amiss  to  state  that  since  the  foregoing  article  was 
written,  Payne's  remains  have  been  removed  to  the  metropolis  of 
America,  and  a  beautiful  monument  left  in  their  place  to  mark  the 
site  of  their  first  sepulture. 


HOME,  SWEET    HOME. 

John  Howard  Payne  struck  one  of  the  deepest  and  tcn- 
dcrcst  chords  of  the  human  heart  when  he  penned  the  exqui 
site  lines  of  "  Home  ,  Sweet  Home."  The  traveller  wandering  in 
foreign  lands,  the  sailor  keeping  watch  at  midnight  upon  the  great 
deep,  the  soldier  bivouacking  upon  the  battlefield,  the  poor  wait 
in  the  populous  city,  and  the  felon  in  his  lonely  cell,  have  alike  felt 
the  subtle  power  of  this  immortal  song.  There  is  something  in  the 


BACHELORS.  109 

thought  of  home,  "be  it  ever  so  humble,"  that  touches  a  sensitive 
chord  in  every  heart,  causing  it  to  thrill  with  the  most  exquisite 
emotions.  What  precious  memories  and  hallowed  associations 
cluster  around  our  childhood's  home  !  Unconsciously  they  weave 
themselves  like  golden  threads  into  the  warp  and  woof  of  our 
thoughts  and  feelings,  producing  pictures,  the  contemplation  of 
which  inspire  us  with  hope  and  courage  as  we  engage  in  the  activ 
ities  of  a  busy,  rushing  world.  The  farther  we  advance  in  life  the 
more  fondly  we  cherish  the  memory  of  home. 

Home  !  how  that  blessed  word  thrills  the  ear  ! 

In  it  what  recollections  blend  ! 
It  tells  of  childhood's  scenes  so  dear, 
And  speaks  of  many  a  cherished  friend. 

O  !  through  the  world,  where'er  we  roam, 
Though  souls  be  pure,  and  lips  be  kind, 

The  heart  with  fondness  turns  to  home, 
Still  turns  to  those  it  left  behind. 

The  bird,  that  soars  to  yonder  skies, 

Though  nigh  to  heaven,  still  seems  unblessed; 

It  leaves  them,  and  with  rapture  flies 
Downward  to  its  much-loved  nest. 

Though  beauteous  scenes  may  meet  its  view, 

And  breezes  blow  from  balmy  groves, 
With  wing  untired  and  bosom  true, 

It  turns  to  that  dear  spot  it  loves. 

When  heaven  shall  bid  this  soul  depart, 

This  form  return  to  kindred  earth, 
May  the  last  throb  which  swells  my  heart 

Heave,  where  it  started  into  birth. 


IIO  PROPOSAL    AND    ESPOUSAL. 

• 

And  should  affection  shed  one  tear, 

Should  friendship  linger  round  my  tomb  ; 

The  tribute  will  be  doubly  dear, 

When  given  by  those  of  "  home,  sweet  home.'' 


SERVE   THEM    RIGHT. 


Let  bachelors  their  woes  deplore, 

Full  well  they  merit  all  they  feel,  and  more. 

—Pope. 


ADVANTAGES    OF    WEDLOCK. 
"  A  word  to  the  wise  is  sufficient." 

None  but  the  married  man  has  a  home  in  his  old  age  ;  none  has 
friends  then  but  he  ;  none  but  he  knows  and  feels  the  solace  of  the 
domestic  hearth;  none  but  he  lives  and  freshens  in  his  green  old 
age,  amid  the  affections  of  wife  and  children. 

There  are  no  tears  shed  for  the  old  bachelor  ;  there  is  no  ready 
hand  and  kind  heart  to  cheer  him  in  his  loneliness  and  bereave 
ments  ;  there  is  no  one  in  whose  eyes  he  can  see  himself  reflected, 
and  from  whose  lips  he  can  receive  the  unfailing  assurances  of  care 
and  love.  No,  the  old  bachelor  may  be  tolerated  for  his  money  ; 
he  may  eat  and  drink  and  revel  as  such  do  ;  and  he  may  sicken 
and  die  in  a  hotel  or  a  garret  with  plenty  of  attendants  about  him, 
like  so  many  cormorants  waiting  for  their  prey  ;  but  where  is  the 
moistened  eye,  the  gentle  hand,  the  loving  lips  that  ought  to  receive 
his  last  farewell  ?  He  will  never  know  what  it  is  to  be  loved,  and 
to  live  and  die  amid  a  loving  circle.  He  will  go  from  this  world 
ignorant  of  the  delights  of  the  domestic  fireside,  and  on  the  records 
of  humanity  his  lite  is  noted — a  blank. 


<sj&&^ 


,       •:       '       ••-,.    ••• 


"T\  /T* 

V  aidens. 


LL  some  kind  genius,  with  a  language-framing  capacity 
and  possessed  of  a  philanthropic  and  generous  nature, 
invent  a  new  word  therewith  to  designate  that  very 
useful — oftentimes  beautiful — and  utterly  indispen 
sable  class  of  persons  found  in  every  community  (ex 
cept,  perhaps,  in  a  mining  region,  or  on  the  extreme  frontier  of 
civilized  life),  puzzling  to  census-takers,  and  destructive  usually 
of  family  registers,  who  are  known  to  the  world  as  "  maiden  aunts," 
I.  *.,"  old  maids,"  or  what  is  more  euphonious  indeed,  but  much 
more  circumlocutory  and  inconvenient,  "  ladies  of  an  age  uncer 
tain  ?"  Such  a  man  would  be  a  benefactor  to  his  race,  and  would 
earn  the  gratitude  of  all  the  unmarried  belles,  who  have  passed  the 
figures  of  the  ripening,  slowly-rising  "teens,"  and  merged  into  the 
declining  and  rapidly  growing  (if  not  October  browning)  "  ties." 
It  is  certain  that  some  of  the  very  best,  choicest,  most  sensible  and 
clever  spirits  are,  in  a  true  and  proper  sense,  "  left,"  while  many  of 
their  younger,  pert,  and  more  lavish,  charm-flinging  sisters  are  read 
ily,  and,  I  had  almost  said,  indiscriminately  appropriated.  And 
why?  Who  will  solve  this  social  problem?  Of  these  un wooed, 
nay,  scarcely  that,  unwon  beauties,  Grace  Greenwood  very  perti 
nently  says,  that  among  its  other  admirable  manufactures,  Xew 
England  produces  the  best  educated  girls,  the  truest  wives,  the 
noblest  mothers,  and  the  most  glorious  old  maids  in  the  world. 
We  now,  in  behalf  of  our  patient  and,  might  we  not  say,  long 

suffering  sisterhood,  await  the  coming  of  the  magical  word. 

8* 


3SX  XX^^^ 


SPINSTERS. 


A  child  no  more  ;  a  spinster  now — 

A  graceful  maiden,  with  a  gentle  brow; 

A  cheek  tinged  lightly  and  a  dovelike  eye  : 

And  all  hearts  bless  her  as  she  passes  by.—  Mary  Howitt 


HERE  is  no  sweeter  or  more  interesting  character, 
whether  in  fiction  or  real  life,  than  the  spinster  who 
has  for  some  good  reason  refused  a  lover's  proposal, 
and  has  now  reached  the  hour  of  old  maid.  The  ordeal 
through  which  she  has  passed  seems  to  have  refined  her 
feelings,  and  of  itself  insensibly  draws  to  her  the  regards  of 
all  who  know  her  history.  Such  a  one  is  eminently  lovable  and 
sympathetic,  forward  in  all  good  works,  the  warm  friend  of  married 
men  and  women,  the  confidante  of  many  a  tender  passion.  Age 
does  not  wither  the  beauty  of  her  disposition.  She  never  slanders, 
never  retails  ill-natured  gossip  ;  but,  on  the  other  hand,  though 
prompt  to  put  in  a  sensible  word  on  a  crisis,  does  not  deem  it  her 
mission  to  set  all  the  people  around  her  right.  She  makes  an  ad 
mirable  aunt,  and  is  very  necessary  to  a/  large  circle  of  cousins. 
Many  a  young  fellow  on  the  threshold  of  life  bears  a  kindly  remem 
brance  of  the  good  nature  and  tact  with  wrhich  she  helped  him  to 
steer  clear  of  the  shoals  where  he  might  otherwise  have  been 
wrecked. 

Formerly  it  was  a  maxim  that  a  young  woman   should   never 

be  married  till  she  had  spun  herself  a  full  set  of  linen.     Hence,  all 

114 


MAIDENS.  1  1  5 

/ 

unmarried  women  have  been  called  spinsters:  an  appellation  they 
still  retain  in  deeds  and  law  proceedings,  though  many  are  not  en 
titled  to  it." 


INCREASE     OF     SPINSTERS. 

"That  there  is  an  enormous  and  constantly  increasing  number 
of  single  women  in  England  is  undoubted,  and  this  is  certainly  in 
dicative  of  an  unwholesome  social  state.  Many  thousands  of  women 
have  to  earn  their  own  living,  in  place  of  spending  and  husbanding 
the  earnings  of  men.  They  pass  their  time  in  an  incomplete  and 
separate  existence  of  their  own,  instead  of  completing  and  embel 
lishing  the  existence  of  others.  From  the  excess  in  the  number  of 
women  thousands  take  service  in  factories,  while  others  overcrowd 
the  ill-paid  ranks  of  needle-women  and  seamstresses. 

Even  in  the  richer  classes  there  is  the  same  inequality  of  num 
bers,  and  those  who  are  relieved  from  the  necessity  of  working  for 
their  daily  bread,  have  yet  to  seek  some  occupation,  some  interest 
in  life,  to  relieve  the  tedium  of  an  objectless  existence.  Some  pur 
sue  pleasure  merely,  though  this  soon  palls  upon  the  appetite  ; 
others  take  to  charitable  pursuits,  doing,  perchance,  an  equal  amount 
of  good  and  mischief.  Those  whose  tastes  lead  them  to  literary 
or  artistic  pursuits,  are  perhaps  the  least  unhappy.  That  a  redun 
dancy  of  unmarried  women  exists  is  evident  ;  but  it  must  not  be 
regarded  as  caused  wholly  or  mainly  by  a  disparity  in  the  number 
of  the  sexes.  This  difference  does  not  at  the  most  amount  to  6 
per  cent.,  whereas  the  number  of  unmarried  women  in  England 
amounts  not  to  6,  but  actually  to  30  per  cent.,  that  is  to  say,  only 
two  out  of  every  three  women  are  married." 


MAIDEN    AND    HERMIT. 


D  ah  !  forgive  a  stranger  rude, 

A  wretch  forlorn,"  she  cried  ; 
I  ^.^>      "Whose  feet  unhallowed  thus  intrude 
Where  heaven  and  you  reside. 


"  But  let  a  maid  thy  pity  share, 

Whom  love  has  taught  to  stray, 
Who  seeks  for  rest,  but  finds  despair 
Companion  of  her  way. 

"My  father  lived  beside  the  Tync, 

A  wealthy  lord  was  he  ; 
And  all  his  wealth  was  marked  as  mine, 
He  had  but  only  me. 

"To  win  me  from  his  tender  arms, 

Unnumbered  suitors  came, 
Who  praised  me  for  imputed  charms, 
And  felt  or  feigned  a  flame. 

"Each  hour  a  mercenary  crowd, 
With  richest  proffers  strove  ; 
Amongst  the  rest  young  Edwin  bowed, 

But  never  talked  of  love. 
110 


MAIDENS.  117 

in  humble,  simplest  habit  clad, 

No  wealth  nor  power  had  he  ; 
Wisdom  and  worth  were  all  he  had, 
But  these  were  all  to  me. 

"And  when  beside  me  in  the  dale, 

He  carolled  lays  of  love, 
His  breath  lent  fragrance  to  the  gale 
And  music  to  the  grove. 

"The  blossom  opening  to  the  day, 

The  dews  of  heaven  refined, 
Could  naught  of  purity  display 
To  emulate  his  mind. 

"The  de\v,  the  blossom  on  the  tree 
With  charms  inconstant  shine  ; 
Their  charms  were  his,  but  woe  to  me ! 
Their  constancy  was  mine. 

"For  still  I  tried  each  fickle  heart, 

Importunate  and  vain  ; 
And  while  his  passion  touched  my  heart, 
I  triumphed  in  his  pain. 

''Till  quite  dejected  with  my  scorn, 

He  left  me  to  my  pride, 
And  sought  a  solitude  forlorn, 
In  secret  where  he  died. 

"But  mine  the  sorrow,  mine  the  fault, 

And  well  my  life  shall  pay  ; 
I'll  seek  the  solitude  he  sought, 
And  stretch  me  where  he  lay. 

"And  there  forlorn,  despairing,  hid, 
I'll  lay  me  down  and  die  ; 


Il8  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

'Twas  so  for  me  that  Edwin  did, 
And  so  for  him  will  I. 

"Forbid  it,  Heaven  !"  the  Hermit  cried, 

And  clasped  her  to  his  breast  ; 
The  wondering  fair  one  turned  to  chide — 
Twas  Edwin's  self  that  pressed. 

"Turn,  Angelina,  ever  dear, 
My  charmer,  turn  to  see 
Thy  own,  thy  long-lost  Edwin  here, 
Restored  to  love  and  thee. 

"Thus  let  me  hold  thee  to  my  heart, 

.And  every  care  resign  ; 
And  shall  we  never,  never  part, 
My  life — my  all  that's  mine  ? 

''Xo,  never  from  this  hour  to  part, 

We'll  live  and  love  so  true  ; 
The  sigh  that  rends  thy  constant  heart, 
Shall  break  thy  Edwin's  too." — Goldsmith. 


CHARACTERISTIC    MAIDENS 


A    BENEVOLENT    MAIDEN. 


ISS  ST.  PIERRE,  the  Tennessee  heiress,  thinks  she 
can  elevate  the  poor  white  people  of  the  South.  She 
intends  to  form  colonies,  and  give  the  poor  whites 
houses  and  work.  She  will  give  each  family  timber 
to  build  a  house  and  a  ten  year's  lease  on  twenty 
acres  of  land. 


A    TOILSOME    MAIDEN. 

Miss  Elizabeth  Marriott,  a  cultivated  young  lady  of  Stanford- 
ville,  Duchess  County,  N.  Y.,  owns  a  farm,  and  does  quite  as  much 
of  the  work  upon  it  as  her  hired  man.  She  does  the  mowing,  rak 
ing,  and  loading  hay,  sometimes  the  ploughing.  She  has  a  young 
horse  which  is  the  terror  of  all  the  blacksmiths  near,  and  it  is  quite 
impossible  to  have  it  shod  unless  its  mistress  is  on  hand  to  ensure 
the  safety  of  the  man's  limbs. 


A     VAIN     MAIDEN 

A  number  of  young  girls  were  discussing  the  delights  of  their 
summer  outings,  and  comparing  notes  as  to  the  number  of  their 
dancing,  boating,  riding  and  mountain  parties.  One  of  the  maidens 
was  enthusiastic  about  the  mountains,  which  she  had  visited  for  the 

119 


120  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

first  time,  and  where  she  remained  all  summer.  "  Girls,"  she  said, 
"  I  made  a  great  mistake  in  having  both  my  mountain  dresses  in 
grave  colors.  One  ought  never  to  go  to  the  mountains  without  one 
bright-colored  climbing  suit,  for  the  bright  colors  set  off  the  moun- 
tainsjso  well." 

One  of  the  innocent  tricks  of  the  Philadelphia  shop  girls  is  car 
rying  their  dinners  disguised  in  a  music  roll.  It  looks  as  though 
they  belonged  to  the  conservatory,  and  were  going  for  an  early 
music  lesson. 


WHY     GIRLS    DON'T     MARRY. 

"  A  great  deal  has  been  said,"  remarked  a  lady  clerk  in  the 
Treasury  Department,  "about  why  girls  don't  marry.  So  far  I 
have  only  heard  the  men  quoted,  and  they  say  a  great  deal  about 
the  girls  losing  their  charms  and  becoming  less  feminine  by  mixing 
with  the  business  world,  and  about  wanting  to  better  their  condi 
tion  by  marriage.  Now,  if  you  reporters  really  want  to  know  some 
thing  about  the  matter,  why  don't  you  go  to  the  women  themselves? 
I'll  just  tell  you  one  thing  and  it's  what  I  believe  to  be  an  impor 
tant  reason.  When  a  girl  is  kept  at  home,  and  surrounded  by 
girls,  and  hears  of  the  greatness  of  the  masculine  part  of  \\\c  genus 
homo,  and  only  meeting  him  at  picnics  and  in  the  parlor,  she  con 
ceives  rather  an  exalted  idea  of  what  he  really  is.  Then  when  she 
secures  a  position,  and  meets  them  as  they  are  away  from  the  gas 
light's  uncertain  glitter,  her  idea  of  the  actual  tact  falls  considerably 
from  what  it  was  in  her  inexperience,  even  if  she  still  retains  the 
ideal  in  her  mind.  The  fact  is,  we  are  like  Diogenes  —  we  are  hunt 
ing  for  an  honest  man.  \Ve  know  more  about  them  than  we  did, 
and  so  the  right  man  is  harder  to  find."  —  Washington  Republican. 


Reflective  and  thoughtful  and  aober  and  sweet, 
She  hag  come  to  a  place  where  two  roads  m.-i-t  : 
And  which  «he  will  take,  tin*  reader  may 
By  the  Love  in  her  eye  and  the  "  ' -  '   < 


home  "  in  her  dress. 


FAMOUS  SPINSTERS. 


at  the  list.  Elizabeth  of  England,  one  of  the  most 
illustrious  of  modern  sovereigns.  Her  rule  over  Great 
Britain  certainly  comprised  the  most  brilliant  literary 
age  of  the  English-speaking  people.  Her  political  acu 
men  was  certainly  put  to  as  severe  tests  as  that  of  any 
other  ruler  the  world  ever  saw.  Maria  Edgeworth  was  an  old  maid. 
It  was  this  woman's  writings  that  first  suggested  the  thought  of 
writing  similarly  to  Sir  Walter  Scott.  Her  brain  might  well  be 
called  the  mother  of  the  Waverley  Novels.  Jane  Porter  lived  and 
died  an  old  maid.  The  children  of  her  busy  brain  were  "Thaddeus 
of  Warsaw,"  and  the  "  Scottish  Chiefs,"  which  have  moved  the 
hearts  of  millions  with  excitement  and  tears.  Joanna  Baillie.  poet 
and  play  writer,  was  "one  of  'em."  Florence  Nightingale,  most 
gracious  lady,  heroine  of  Balaklava  hospitals,  has  to  the  present 
written  "Miss"  before  her  name.  The  man  who  should  marry  her 
might  well  crave  to  take  the  name  of  Nightingale.  Sister  Dora, 
the  brave  spirit  of  English  pest-houses,  whose  story  is  as  a  helpful 
evangel,  was  the  bride  of  the  world's  sorrow  only.  And  then  what 
names  could  the  reader  and  the  writer  add  of  those  whom  the  great 
world  may  not  know,  but  we  know,  and  the  little  world  of  the  vil 
lage,  the  church,  the  family  know,  and  prize  beyond  all  worlds.— 
Nor  til  British  Advertiser. 

121 


122  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

FORTUNE    AND    LOVE. 

Let  me  live  without  Fortune  if  Providence  will  it, 

For  Joy  can  be  found  where  small  treasure  is  shed  ; 
Those  who  bear  a  full  cup  are  the  aptcst  to  spill  it, 

And  oftentimes  walk  with  the  narrowest  tread. 
I  care  not  though  fate  may  deny  me  profusion, 

If  earth  will  but  show  me  some  rays  from  above  ; 
Tell  me  not  that  such  life  is  a  dreamy  illusion— 

I  could  live  without  Fortune,  but  not  without  Love ! 

Oh  !  'tis  pleasant  to  know  there  are  beings  above  us 

Who  tune  the  most  exquisite  strings  in  our  heart, 
To  feel  that  they  would  not  be  happy  without  us, 

And  that  we,  in  our  loneliness,  sigh  when  we  part. 
Oh  !  there's  something  divine  in  the  thought  that  we  cherish. 

A  star-beam  within  us  that  shines  from  above — 
To  know,  that  if  all  which  gold  gives  us  should  perish, 

The  greatest  of  Fortune  still  dwells  in  our  Love ' 

Oh  !  'tis  glory  to  feel  that  we  live  for  some  others. 

That  Self  is  not  all  we  depend  on  below, 
That  affection  yet  links  us  to  sisters  and  brothers, 

Whose  faith  will  be  constant,  come  weal  or  come  woe. 
Though  the  vulture  of  trouble  may  harass  our  bosom, 

Ne'er  fear  while  our  spirit  is  fed  by  the  dove  ; 
Let  the  desert  of  Life  give  Eternity's  blossom, 
And  we'll  live  without  Fortune,  while  favored  by  Love  ! 

— Eliza  Cook. 


CELIBACY    FAVORABLE    TO   AUTHORSHIP. 

A  survey  of  the  lives  of  the  later  literary  women  shows  us  two 
things:  First,  that  most  of  them  were  cither  single,  or,  if  married, 
were  childless  ;  and,  second,  that  they  have  been  generally  long- 


MAIDENS.  123 

lived.  The  list  of  literary  spinsters  includes  Fredcrika  Bremer, 
Emily  Bronte,  Hannah  Moore,  Harriet  Martineau,  Eliza  Cook, 
Miss  Sedgewick,  the  Carys,  Miss  Dickenson,  Maria  Edgeworth, 
Miss  Mitford,  Augusta  Evans,  Jane  Austen  ;  while  that  of  childless 
women  includes  Mrs.  Nichols  (Charlotte  Bronte),  Mrs.  Somerville, 
Mrs.  Cross  v  George  Eliot),  Mrs.  McLean  (Letitia  E.  Landon).  Sev 
eral  had  one  or  two  children  only  ;  for  example,  Mrs.  Barret  Brown 
ing  had  one  son,  and  Madame  Darblay  one  son,  Madame  de  Se- 
vigne  two  children  ;  Madame  de  Stael  also  had  children.  It  is,  no 
doubt,  true  that  both  men  and  women  of  distinguished  intellectual 
talents,  and  who  are  active  brain  workers,  are  liable  to  be  childless 
or  to  have  but  few  children.  The  longevity  of  female  brain-workers 
is  simply  in  accordance  with  the  established  fact  of  the  longevity 
of  masculine  brain-workers.  Thus,  Hannah  Moore  died  at  the  age 
of  88,  Mrs.  Somerville  at  the  age  of  92,  Miss  Mitford  at  the  age  ot 
69.  At  the  time  of  her  death  Mme.  de  Sevigne  was  70.  Miss  Bre 
mer  64,  Miss  Edgeworth  82,  Mme.  Darblay  88. 

AMERICA'S  STRONG-MINDED  WOMEN. 

"  In  America,  where  life  is  lived  double-quick,  and  where  every 
product,  from  a  continent  downwards,  is  of  the  largest  size,  there 
are  crops  of  over-taught  girlhood  ripe  already  for  our  inspection. 
Women  of  the  middle  classes  there  can  discuss  the  nebular  hypoth 
esis  of  the  binomial  theory,  as  ours  talk  of  lacework  and  the  baby. 
Mr.  Hudson,  in  his  recent  *  Scamper  Through  America,'  declares 
that  to  converse  in  the  railway  cars  with  ladies  returning  from  con 
ventions  and  conferences  was  a  genuine  pleasure,  an  intellectual 
treat.  But  he  adds  that  though  one  could  revere  them,  almost 
worship  them,  to  love  them  was  out  of  the  question." 


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•  ^   •  ^x>:>:>:x>:Tv>;r^v>;r^vxt-^>:^n! 
:*::o::^ 


DAUGHTERS. 


^ 
ERTAIN   it  is  that  there  is  no  relation  so  purely  angelic 

as  that  of  a  father  to  a  daughter.     He  beholds  her  both 
iS     w^  anc*  witnout  regard  to  her  sex.        In  love   to  our 
£j&     wives  there  is  desire  ;  to   our  sons  there   is  ambition  ; 
but  in  that  to  our  daughters  there  is   something  which 
there  are  no  words  to  express. — Addison. 

— m<& — 

Of  all  the  knots  which  nature  ties 

The  secret,  sacred  sympathies, 

That,  as  with  viewless  chains  of  gold, 

The  heart  a  happy  prisoner  hold  ; 

None  is  more  chaste,  more  bright,  more  pure, 

Stronger  stern  trials  to  endure  ; 

None  is  more  pure  of  earthly  leaven, 

More  like  the  love  of  highest  heaven, 

Than  that  which  binds,  in  bonds  how  blest, 

A  daughter  to  a  father's  breast.—/.   IT.  Cunningham. 

M*& — 

In  a  father's  love,  like  a  well-drawn  picture,  he  eyes  all  his  child 
ren  alike  (if  there  be  a  parity  of  deserts),  never  parching  one  to 
drown  another. — Fuller. 

m 


MAIDENS.  125 

DAUGHTER'S    NAMES. 

And  he  called  the  name  of  the  first  Jemima:  and  the  name  of 
the  second,  Kezia  ;  and  the  name  of  the  third,  Keren-happuch. — 
Job  xlii.  14.. 

These  names  are  very  characteristic,  and  are  exactly  of  the  same 
class  as  are  at  the  present  day  given  to  the  women  in  the  East. 
The  first  name,  Jemima^  according  to  the  Targum,  means  "  day  ;" 
or  may  as  probably  have  the  signification  of  "  turtle  "  or  "  dove," 
which  it  bears  in  the  Arabic  language.  The  second  is  cassia — the 
aromatic  of  that  name.  And  the  third  appears  to  be  correctly  ren 
dered  by  the  Vulgate,  cornu-stibii — "  the  horn  or  vessel  of  stibium? 
that  is,  of  paint,  such  paint  as  the  eyes  were  adorned  with.  All 
these  name  are  in  exact  conformity  with  the  present  usages,  in 
which  the  names  of  females  are  taken  from  whatever  is  considered 
agreeable  and  beautiful — flowers  fruits,  gums,  perfumes,  precious 
stones,  and  the  like.  The  last  name  is  the  most  singular.  It  is 
one  of  the  chacteristics  of  the  Orientals  that  they  do  not  keep  in 
the  background  the  materials  and  instruments  of  personal  adorn 
ment,  but  obtrude  them  on  every  occasion,  as  objects  calculated  to 
suggest  agreeable  ideas.  Hence  the  vessels  containing  paints,  un 
guents,  and  perfumes,  give  names  to  females,  supply  images  to 
poetry  ;  and  painted  representations  of  them,  with  their  names  in 
scribed  upon  them,  occur,  equally  with  representations  of  flowers, 
on  the  walls  of  palaces  in  the  East.  It  is  also  remarkable  that  this 
custom  of  painting  the  eyes  should  have  existed  at  so  very  early  a 
period  as  the  name  of  Job's  daughter  intimates.  Yet  we  know  that 
it  existed  in  the  time  of  the  kings  (see  II.  Kings  ix.  30) ;  as  also 
among  the  ancient  Egyptians,  as  appears  from  their  paintings  and 
mummies,  as  well  as  from  the  fact  that  vessels  with  remains  of  the 
black  powder,  and  the  probes  or  pencils  for  applying  it  to  the  eye, 
have  often  been  found  in  the  ancient  tombs. — Dr.  Kitto. 


126  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

THE    HEART   ASSERTING    ITSELF,   OR   THE   CLOISTER. 
'"Look  on  the  placid  water '- 

The  wily  abbess  spake — 
'  Look  and  receive,  my  daughter, 

A  lesson  from  the  lake. 
Upon  its  face  no  wrinkle 

Is  made  by  breeze  of  even  ; 
Bright  in  its  bosom  twinkle 
The  far-off  stars  of  heaven. 

Tis  thus  the  Bride  of  Heaven 

Doth  calmly  pass  her  life  ; 
I  Icr  heart  is  never  riven 

By  worldly  sin  and  strife. 
Serene  in  her  seclusion, 

In  quiet  doth  her  soul, 
Unruffled  by  intrusion, 

Look  upward  to  its  goal.' 

4  Xo,  no,  my  Reverend  Mother' — 

The  lady  bright  replied  ; 
4  Unto  my  heart,  far  other 

The  lesson  of  the  tide. 
If  it  were  always  sleeping, 

Devoid  of  fluctuation, 
Soon  o'er  it  would  be  creeping 

The  greenness  of  stagnation. 

The  great  law  of  Jehovah 

Is  Action  here  on  earth  ; 
It  is  the  only  power 

Of  spiritual  worth. 
Then  tempt  me  not,  and  think  not. 

To  shake  my  soul  with  doubt ; 
God  helping  me,  I'll  shrink  not 

But  fight  the  battle  out." 


MAIDENS.  127 

ACTIVITY    THE    RAREST    JEWEL. 

Work  is  with  enjoyment  rife, 
Conservates  both  health  and  life  ; 
Merrily  speeds  on  the  day, 
Chases  care  and  gloom  away. 

Tis  the  bracelet  on  the  wrist, 
Tis  the  brooch  of  amethyst, 
'Tis  Ahe  circlet  on  the  brow. 
'Tis  the  fruit  upon  life's  bough  ; 
'Tis  earth's  blessing,  not  its  ban, 
Tis  the  assurance  of  a  man. 

Honour  to  the  men  who  toil, 
Though  at  common  tasks  they  moil  ; 
Shirtless  arm  and  gloveless  hand  —  - 
Honor  to  the  noble  band  : 
Let  men  rank  however  high, 
Work  is  life's  sole  dignity. 

Be  no  aimless  idler  then 
But  a  worker  among  men  : 
Planning,  building  —  every  sun 
Something  ended  or  begun  — 
Filled  with  special  toil  thy  hours, 
As  befits  thy  gifts  and  powers. 

—S.  W.  Partridge. 


QUALITIES  —  SURPASSING    LOVELINESS. 

She  had  read 

Her  father's  well-filled  library  —  with  profit, 
And  could  talk  charmingly      Then  she  would  sing 
And  plav,  too,  passably,  — 


123  PROPOSAL    AND    ESPOUSAL. 

• 

She  sketched  irom  nature  well,  and  studied  flowers, 

Which  was  enough,  alone,  to  love  her  for  : 

Yet  she  was  knowing  —  in  all  her  needle  work  — 

And  shone  —  in  dairy  —  and  in  kitchen,  too  — 

As  in  the  parlor.  —  Anon, 


When  sailing  on  this  troubled  sea 
Of  pain,  and  tears,  and  agony  ; 
Though  wildly  roar  the  waves  around, 
With  restless  and  repeated  sound, 
'Tis  sweet  to  think  that  on  our  eyes 
A  lovelier  clime  shall  yet  arise  ; 
That  we  shall  wake  from  sorrow's  dream 
Beside  a  pure  and  living  stream." 


HUMAN      WAYWARDNESS  ;     OR,     HOW     SHALL     WE     DISPOSE      OF 
OUR     DAUGHTERS. 

Perhaps  the  native  depravity  of  the  human  heart  is  nowhere 
more  clearly  discernible  than  in  its  constant  longing,  ceaseless 
yearning,  and  eager,  incontinent  hankering  after  the  inhibited  and 
forbidden.  The  story  of  the  forbidden  tree  in  Eden  ;  the  fable  of 
the  "  covered  dish  "  on  the  ample  table  ;  the  old  legend  of  Blue 
beard's  bloody  room,  that  startled  us  in  the  nursery,  all  point  in 
the  same  direction,  and  serve  to  show  the  truth  opposing  bias  of 
the  natural  heart  of  unregcnerate  man.  Man's  very  instincts  are 
contradictory,  and  oftentimes  the  only  way  to  pursuade  him  to  a 
course  of  right  is  to  impress  him  with  the  belief  that  it  it  is  "  very 
wrong"  —  a  doubtful  expedient,  and  not  wholly  in  the  interest  of 
truth  and  strict  morality. 

We  have  heard  of  a  French  women,  who,  while  greatly  enjoying 
herself  in  a  legitimate  and  ordinate  way,  yet  complained  that  there 


MAIDENS.  129 

was  not  a  touch  of  the  inordinate  about  it,  exclaiming-  :  "Oh  !  that 
there  were  a  little  sin  in  it."  So  blind  are  men  to  the  beauty  of 
truth,  to  the  majesty  of  the  divine  law,  and  to  the  "exceeding  sin- 
fulness  of  sin."  They  even,  according  to  scripture,  make  a  delicacy 
of  it,  a  moral  "  sweetmeat,"  and  "  roll  it  under  their  tongue  as  a 
sweet  morsel." 

And  nowhere  is  this  seen  more  than  in  matters  pertaining  to 
affection  between  the  sexes.  Love  is  ever  painted  blind,  and  rightly 
so,  for  it  is  almost  sure  to  run  a  tilt  at  discretion,  and  go  directly 
contrary  to  the  course  of  good  counsel.  The  more  barriers  you 
put  before  it,  the  more  will  it  summon  its  energies  to  surmount 
them,  and  for  this  reason,  the  following  anecdote  may  not  be  with 
out  its  significance,  though  the  dissimulation  involved  in  it  we 
cannot  quite  recommend. 


BROWN'S    MATRIMONIAL    METHOD. 

"  Brown,  I  don't  see  how  it  is  that  your  girls  all  marry  off  as  soon 
as  they  are  old  enough,  while  none  of  mine  can  marry." 

"  Oh  !  that's  simple  enough.  I  marry  my  girls  off  on  the  buck 
wheat  straw  principle." 

"  But  what  is  that  principle  ?     I  never  heard  of  it  before." 

"Well,  I  used  to  raise  a  good  deal  of  buckwheat,  and  it  puzzled 
me  a  good  deal  to  get  rid  of  the  straw.  Nothing  would  eat  it,  and 
it  was  a  great  bother  to  me.  At  last  I  thought  of  a  plan.  I  stacked 
my  buckwheat  straw  nicely,  and  built  a  high  rail  fence  around  it. 
My  cattle,  of  course,  concluded  that  it  was  something  good,  and  at 
once  tore  down  the  fence  and  began  to  eat  the  straw.  I  drove 
them  away  and  put  up  the  fence  a  few  times,  but  the  more  I  drove 
them  away,  the  more  anxious  they  became  to  eat  the  straw.  After 
this  had  been  repeated  a  few  times,  the  cattle  determined  to  eat 


13°  PROPOSAL   AND    ESPOUSAL. 


the  straw,  and  cat  it  they  did,  every  bit  of  it.  As  I  said,  I  marry 
my  girls  off  on  the  same  principle.  When  a  young:  man  I  don't 
like  begins  calling  on  my  girls,  I  encourage  him  in  every  way  I 
can.  I  tell  him  to  come  as  often  and  stay  as  late  as  he  pleases, 
and  I  take  pains  to  hint  to  the  girls  that  I  think  they'd  better  set 
their  caps  for  him.  It  works  first-rate.  He  don't  make  many  calls, 
for  the  girls  treat  him  as  coolly  as  they  can.  But  when  a  young 
fellow  that  I  like  comes  around,  a  man  that  I  think  would  suit  me 
for  a  son-in-law,  I  don't  let  him  make  many  calls  before  I  give  him 
to  understand  that  he  isn't  wanted  around  my  house.  I  tell  the 
girls,  too,  that  they  shall  not  have  anything  to  do  with  him,  and 
give  them  orders  never  to  speak  to  him  again.  The  plan  works 
first  rate.  The  young  folks  begin  to  pity  each  other,  and  the  next 
thing  I  know  they  are  engaged  to  be  married.  When  I  sec  that 
they  arc  determined  to  marry,  I  always  give  in,  and  pretend  to 
make  the  bc.^t  of  it.  That's  the  way  to  manage  it." 


Nothing    needs    a    lie. —  }\7ashington. 
Buy  the  truth  and  sell  it  not. — Solomon. 


m*. 


MISSES. 


(NOTHER  word  in  the  lesson  was  in  the  expression,  "  he 
will  miss  the  mark,"  or  some  such  thing-  as  that  On 
asking  the  class  what  the  word  "  miss  "  meant,  all  were 
silent,  and  looked  a  little  confused.  At  length  one  fel 
low,  sure  that  he  had  the  proper  answe-r,  and  confident 
thereby  of  getting  to  the  top  at  one  bound,  took  one  step  forward, 
and,  impatient  to  reveal  and  profit  by  his  discovery,  shook  his  ex 
tended  arm,  waiting  for  my  signal  to  come  out  with  it.  That  given, 
with  a  look  of  triumph  he  shrieked  out  at  the  top  of  his  voice,  "Miss 
means  a  woman  that  hasna  gotten  a  man  !" — Rev.  Dr.  Gut/trie 


MISS    NIGHTINGALE. 

"  Miss  Nightingale  forever  !"  they  shouted  in  acclamation,  as 
they  gave  the  heroine  of  hospital  fame  a  most  generous  ovation  in 
England.  "  Nay,  not  Miss  Nightingale  for  ever,"  she  replied,  with  a 
significant  and  gracious,  spouse-inclining  glance.  It  were  of  course 
not  natural  nor  congenial  to  such  a  broad  and  loving  nature  to  be 
"  Missed  "  for  ever. 

— m® — 

MERCY'S   DECISION. 

Mercy.— Well,  said  Mercy,  if  nobody  wfll  have  me  I  will  die  a 
maid,  or  my  conditions  shall  be  to  me  a  husband  ;  for  I  cannot 

131 


132  PROPOSAL  AND   ESPOUSAL. 

change  my  nature,  and  to  have  one  that  is  cross  to  me  in  this,  I 
purpose  never  to  admit  as  long  as  I  live.  I  had  a  sister  named 
Bountiful  that  was  married  to  one  of  these  churls  ;  but  he  and  she 
could  never  agree  ;  but  because  my  sister  was  resolved  to  do  as  she 
had  begun,  that  is,  to  show  kindness  to  the  poor,  therefore  her  hus 
band  first  cried  her  down  at  the  cross,  and  then  turned  her  out  of 
doors. 

Prudence. — And  yet  he  was  a  professor,  I  warrant  you. 

Mercy. — -Yes,  such  a  one  as  he  was,  and  of  such  as  the  world  is 
now  full,  but  I  am  for  none  of  them  all. — Bunyan. 


YIRC.INS    IN    HARNESS.— A    RUSSIAN    CHARM. 

The  village  of  Minussinsk  in  Russia,  has  been  deeply  troubled 
by  the  pest  among  its  cows  ;  and  the  conscript  fathers  of  the  com 
munity  held  a  meeting  to  decide  upon  the  best  means  of  putting  a 
stop  to  the  calamity.  It  was  agreed  that  resort  should  be  had  to 
the  old  Slavonic  custom  of  "  round-ploughing."  The  Sveit  gives 
an  account  of  the  process.  Seven  virgins,  two  old  women,  and  a 
young  bachelor  of  good  character  are  elected.  At  midnight  a  pro 
cession  of  the  peasants  is  formed,  led  by  the  two  old  women  carry 
ing  pictures  of  saints.  In  the  rear  of  the  procession  the  seven 
maidens  are  harnessed  to  a  plough,  which  is  guided  by  the  young 
man.  A  light  furrow  is  ploughed  around  the  village  ;  and  thereby, 
according  to  the  belief  of  the  local  agriculturists,  a  barrier  is  pro 
vided  against  the  evil  spirit  which  causes  the  pest :  he  has  no  power 
to  pass  over  the  mystical  furrow. — St.  James  Gazette. 

We  are  ready  to  vouch  tor  it,  that  seven  maidens,  with  an  eligi 
ble  young  bachelor  behind  them,  will  never  be  able  to  plough  a 
straight  furrow. 


Love's  watchfires  buro  with  a  steady  clow. 


MAIDENS.  133 

THE   VILLAGE    BELLE. 

He  was  a  robust  man  and  strong, 

And  she  of  slender  mould, 
They  married  young — too  young,  in  fact, 

To  love  real  well  when  old. 

He  was  a  popular  boy  in  town, 

And  she  a  country  belle  ; 
Such  contrasts  mate  and  learn  too  late, 

As  more  events  will  tell. 

He  set  his  heart  on  rapid  gains, 

And  she,  to  do  her  part, 
Slaved,  worked  and  saved,  took  extra  pains 

To  get  an  early  start.  4 

Long  winter  days,  in  timber  woods, 

She  kept  the  camp  and  store, 
And  rapidly  they  gathered  gold, 

As  few  have  done  before. 

She  cooked  the  meals  and  made  the  beds, 

Did  washing  for  two  score, 
And  proved  a  helpmate  true  indeed— 

A  wife  and  something  more. 

To  crown  their  labor  and  success 

And  do  a  double  part, 
She  raised  his  children  one  by  one, 

And  gave  them  each  a  start. 

He,  foreman  of  the  lumber  woods, 

And  buyer  for  the  store, 
She,  salesman  of  rude,  clumsy  goods, 

Is  now  a  belle  no  more. 


134  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

The  camp  has  brought  her  overwork, 
And  undermined  her  health  : 

The  wrinkles  thick  upon  her  brow 
Show  how  they  use  their  wealth. 

'Twas  once  his  manly,  honest  boast 
That  she  was  very  smart ; 

That  from  her  savings  long  ago 
He  got  his  early  start. 

Tis  said  that  miserly  he  grew 

And  scrimped  and  pinched  his  gold, 

And  every  hardship  gave  to  her, 
And  every  luxury  sold. 

His  frequent  trips  to  city 

With  buoyant  hopes  and  pride, 

The  sight  of  many  handsome  ones 
Made  him  neglect  his  bride. 

And  now  his  heart  is  harder, 
And  now  her  face  is  old  ; 

While  larger  grow  their  riches, 
His  iron  heart  grows  cold. 

Dame  Gossip  tells  a  story— 

A  woman  in  the  case- 
But  he  rides  on  in  glory, 

And  wears  a  smiling  face. 

A  deacon  and  director — 

A  man  of  solid  make — 
lie  would — but  she  is  in  the  way — 

High  social  standing  take. 


MAIDENS.  135 

And  now,  would  you  believe  it  ? 

He  bribes  a  wicked  one 
To  claim  he's  been  too  intimate — 

Confesses  what  he's  done  ! 

A  bill  details  the  muddy  lines, 

And  words  unfit  to  say, 
That  he  would  break  the  wedded  bonds, 

And  cast  his  wife  away. 

His  wife  who  toiled  so  faithfully, 

Whose  wrinkles  tell  of  care, 
Who  bore  him  four  bright  children. 

Who  wears,  now,  silver  hair  : 

By  threats  and  low  devices, 

He  gains  her  name  to  deeds  ; 
Poor  soul !      In  agony  like  death, 

What  knows  she  what  she  reads  ? 

The  lawyers  hear  her  story, 

The  bill  is  quickly  do  no. 
He  gets  his  eight-tenths  of  the  wealth, 

And  she  gets  barely  one. 

The  press  has  heard  the  story, 

The  press  repeats  her  cry, 
They  raise  a  furore  on  the  streets, 

They  will  not  pass  it  by  ! 

With  ample  wealth  from  banks  and  stocks, 

He  fetters  not  the  press  ; 
The  more  he  tries  to  hush  it  up 

The  less  it  stops,  and  less. 


PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

Blind  justice  with  her  even  scales 

Stands  silent,  listening  by, 
As  tempting  gold  is  tendered  her 

By  agents  ever  nigh. 

But  sturdy  sense  is  at  the  helm. 

And  justice  will  be  done  ; 
The  deed's  revoked,  the  Courts  undo 

The  wicked  work  he's  done. 

And  she  applies — and  prayers  are  heard, 

To  save  a  reckless  wreck  ; 
And  he — flics  with  his  heart's  desire, 

Whose  charms  ensnare  his  neck. 

So  parted,  yet  so  desolate, 

She  bears  the  cruel  shame  , 
The  woman  ever  bears   the  cross, 

While  man  is  most  to  blame. 

— Detroit  Commercial  Advertiser 


HOW   TO   CHOOSE   A   WIFE. 


E  SURE  and  have  plenty  of  light  on  the  subject. 

Look  before  you   loup,  ye'll   ken   better  where  to 
leet. — ScottisJi  Proverb. 

No  light  like  candle  light.     Choose  neither  jewels 
nor  women,  nor  linen  by  candle  light. 

By  candle  light  a  goat  looks  a  lady. 
The  night  shows  stars  and  women  in  a  better  light. 
If  you  want  a  wife,  choose  her  on  Saturday,  and  not  on  Sunday. 
Nice  feathers  make  fine  fowls. 
No  woman  is  ugly  when  she  is  dressed. 
Handsome  is  not  what  is  handsome,  but  what  pleases. 
Never  seemed  a  prison  fair  nor  mistress  foul. 
He  whose  fair  one  squints  says  she  ogles. 
The  swarthy  dame,  dressed  fine,  decries  the  fair  one' 
The  fairer  the  hostess  the  fouler  the  reckoning. 
A  handsome  landlady  is  bad  for  the  purse,  for  this  among  other 
reasons — that  if  the  landlady  is  fair,  the  wine  too  is  fair. 

A  bonny  bride   is  sune  buskit.     (Buskit — dressed.     She  needs 
little  adornment  to  enhance  her  charms.)    * 


ROYAL   MATCH-MAKING. 

When  the  present  King  of  the  Belgians,  after  an   absence  of 
some  years,  paid  a  visit  to  his  former  friend,  the  Duke  of  Orleans 


139 


14°  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

(Louis  Phillippc),  his  Majesty  of  the  French  said  to  him,  "  Well 
now,  you  will  want  a  wife.  I  have  three  charming  girls.  My 
Louisa  is  fair  and  flaxen  ;  my  Maria  is  brown,  and  black-haired; 
my  Clementine  is,  perhaps,  too  young  for  you  :  but  you  shall  see 
them  ah,  and  it  is  a  hard  thing  indeed  if  one  will  not  please  you." 

He  was  not  long  before  he  made  his  choice,  and  the  fair  and  sweet 
Louisa  soon  became  Queen  of  the  Belgians. 

COMPLYING,  VET   DENYING. 

Banker  Goldschmidt — "Judge  Ingcrsoll,  my  son  would  esteem 
it  hi.-,  highest  good  fortune  if  you  would  bestow  upon  him  one  of 
your  girls." 

Judge  Ingcrsoll — "  And  which  of  my  girls  docs  your  son  fancy  ?' 

Banker  Goldschmidt — "  I  will  call  him,  so  that  he  can  say  for 
himself." 

Judge  Ingcrsoll — "  And  I  will  call  my  girls,  so  that  he  can  make 
a  choice  for  himself  in  their  favor." 

(Calls  servant  girls.J     Confusion  and  disappointment. 

LOYK    THINK    EQUAL. 
Oh  !   wisest  of  the  wise  is  he 
Who  first  within  his  spirit  knew 
And  with  his  tongue  declared  it  true, 
That  love    comes  best  that  comes  unto 

The  equal  of  degree! 
And  that  the  poor  and  that  the  low 
Should  seek  no  love  from  those  above, 
Whose  souls  are  fluttered  with  the  flow 
Of  airs  about  their  golden  height, 
Or  proud  because  they  see  around 

Ancestral  "  crowns  of  light." 

— Elisabeth  Barrett  Browning. 


MATCH-MAKING.  141 

The  end  is  to  have  two  made  one 
In  will  and  affection. — Ben  Jolmson. 

In  the  rich  woman's  house  she  commands  always,  he  never. 

He  that  marries  for  a  dower,  turns  his  back  on  freedom. 

She  hauds  up  her  head  like  a  hen  drinking  water. 

Your  wife  and  your  nag  get  from  a  neighbor. 

He  that  goes  far  to  marry,  goes  to  be  deceived  or  to  deceive. 
The  politic  Lord  Burleigh  seems  to  have  regarded  this  "  going  far 
to  deceive  "  as  a  very  proper  thing  to  be  done  for  the  advancement 
of  a  man's  fortune.  In  his  "  Advice  to  his  Son,"  he  says,  "  If  thy 
estate  be  good,  match  near  home  and  at  leisure  ;  if  weak,  afar  off 
and  quickly."  There  is  an  ugly  cunning  in  that  word  quickly. 

CONTENTED   POVERTY. 

Cleon  hath  a  million  acres — ne'er  a  one  have  I  ; 
Cleon  dwelleth  in  a  palace — in  a  cottage,  I ; 
Cleon  hath  a  dozen  fortunes — not  a  penny,  I  ; 
But  the  poorer  of  the  twain  is  Cleon,  and  not  I. 

Cleon,  true,  possesseth  acres — but  the  landscape,  I ; 
Half  the  charms  to  me  it  yieldeth,  money  cannot  buy  ; 
Cleon  harbors  sloth  and  dullness — freshening  vigor,  I  ; 
He  in  velvet,  I  in  fustian  ;  richer  man  am  I. 

Cleon  is  a  slave  to  grandeur — free  as  thought  am  I  ; 
Cleon  fees  a  score  of  doctors — need  of  none  have  I  ; 
Wealth-surrounded,  care-environed,  Cleon  fears  to  die  ; 
Death  may  come — he'll  find  me  ready — happier  man  am  I 

Cleon  sees  no  charm  in  Nature — in  a  daisy,  1  ; 
Cleon  hears  no  anthem  ringing  in  the  sea  and  sky, 
Nature  sings  to  me  forever — earnest  listener,  I  ; 
State  for  state,  with  all  attendants,  who  would  change  ?  Not  1 

— Charles  McKay. 


142  PROPOSAL   AND    ESPOUSAL. 

VIRTUE    BEFORE    RICHES. 

Themistocles  had  a  daughter,  to  whom  two  men  were  wishing 
to  make  love  ;  one  was  very  rich,  but  a  simpleton,  and  the  other 
poor,  but  a  very  wise  man.  The  father  preferred  the  latter,  saying, 
"  I  would  rather  have  a  man  without  riches,  than  riches  without  a 
man." 

"  The  primal  duties  shine  aloft  like  stars  ; 
The  charities  that  soothe,  and  heal,  and  bless, 
Are  scattered  at  their  feet  like  flowers  ; 
The  generous  inclination,  the  just  rule, 
Kind  wishes,  and  good  actions,  and  pure  thoughts. 
No  mystery  is  here,  no  special  boon 
For  high,  and  not  for  low,  for  proudly  graced, 
And  not  for  meek  of  heart.     The  smoke  ascends 
To  hcaxcn  as  lightly  from  the  cottage  hearth 
As  from  the  haughty  palace.      He,  whose  soul 
Ponders  this  true  equality,  may  walk 
The  fields  of  earth  with  gratitude  and  hope." 


A.  X      U  X  E  Q  U  A  L      YOKE. 

Those  excellent,  well-meaning,  and  highly  philanthropical  young 
women  who,  with  marvellous  temerity,  marry  men — as  they  ex 
press  it — to  reform  them,  vainly  imagining  that  they  will  have 
more  power  over  them  after  marriage  than  before,  generally  grossly 
miscalculate  their  influence,  and  find  that  ti\z  forming  is  done  from 
the  other  side  with  a  de,  rather  than  a  ie,  prefix.  In  other  words, 
the  would-be  reformer  of  another  is  herself  deformed  by  another. 
These  good  Samaritans  "  reckon  without  their  host,"  and  strongly 
remind  us  of  an  enterprising  American  farmer  who,  doubtless  with 
a  very  laudable  intent,  conceived  the  idea  of  training  a  call  to  early 
labor  by  first  putting  his  own  neck  in  the  yoke  with  it  ;  but  the 
bovine  brain  not  being  capable  of  apprehending  the  very  benevo 
lent  design  of  his  owner,  and  being  somewhat  alarmed  at  seeing  a 


MATCH-MAKING  143 

human  face  in  such  close  proximity  to  his  own,  at  once  took  fright 
and  incontinently  ran  away,  dragging  his  disconcerted  and  unequal 
yoke-fellow  along  with  him  into  some  very  unfrequented  paths,  and 
at  a  remarkably  unusual  rate  of  speed  withal  :  the  man  having  all 
the  disadvantage  when  thus  bound  neck  and  neck  with  the  brute, 
and  all  that  he  could  do  under  the  curious  and  self-created  circum 
stances  was  to  solicit  the  commiseration  of  the  by-passers,  and  ask 
their  aid,  as  he  expressed  it,  to  "head  us  of,  head  us  off."  Moral  : 
Don't  yoke  yourself  with  a  calf. 

Neither  should  any  light  and  trivial  reasons  determine  your 
course  in  such  an  important  matter  as  this  ;  such  as  merely  to 
"  grace  a  holiday,"  and  "  make  a  sensation,"  or  to  "  form  a  second 
couple  at  a  wedding,"  and  "  surprise  somebody  ;"  or  from  a  mere 
pique  at  being  jilted,  which  is  merely  cutting  off  the  nose  to  spite 
the  face  ;  or  for  testing'  the  bare  novelty  of  the  marriage  relation, 
just  out  of  a  mere  love  of  variety,  like  the  fair  and  fickle  French 
woman,  of  whom  we  have  heard,  who  •'  wished  to  die  just  for  the 
change  ;"  —  rushing  into  this  grave  situation  as  lightly  as  did  thv. 
young  man  who,  when  asked  why  he  got  married,  flippantly  re 
plied,  "  So  as  to  have  something  to  look  at  on  Sundays." 

Oh  !  a  thousand  unworthy  motives  have  led  persons  of  both 
sexes  to  assume  these  great  responsibilities,  and  to  glibly  "  tie  a 
knot  with  their  tongue  which  they  could  not  undo  with  their  teeth/'' 
though  we  have  seen  them  "  set  their  teeth"  hard  enough  afterwards. 
It  was  not  till  the  important  and  indissoluble  contract  was  made., 
and  the  solemn  and  inviolable  compact  entered  into,  that  they  fully 
awoke  to  the  gravity  of  the  inexorable  situation! 


v  •  Ye  maidens  fair,  consider  well, 

And  look  both  shrewd  and  sly, 
Ere  rev'rend  lips  make  good  the  knot 
Your  teeth  will  ne'er  untie." 


144  PROPOSAL  AND   ESPOUSAL. 

The  adopted  daughter  of  a  North  Carolina  farmer  ran  away  and 
returned  to  the  family  hovel  on  the  mountain.  A  neighbor  looking 
for  her  stray  cows  came  across  her  standing  in  the  door,  and  accep 
ted  an  invitation  to  enter.  Looking  around  at  the  squalor  and 
filth,  she  exclaimed,  "I  don't  see,  Sallie,  what  made  you  leave  them 
good  folks,  where  everything  was  so  nice  and  neat."  "  Wa'll,"  was 
the  reply,  "you  see,  I  was  just  gorged  with  neatness." 


A  marriage  that  saved  a  life  sentence  was  solemnized  recently 
in  Wisconsin.  A  woman  who  was  charged  with  murdering  her 
husband  was  tried,  convicted,  and  sentenced  to  the  State  prison  for 
life,  but  the  Supreme  Court  granted  her  a  new  trial,  and  on  the 
second  trial  the  jury  disagreed.  Since  then  she  has  married  the 
principal  witness  against  her,  which  renders  his  testimony  worth 
less.  She  made  an  application  to  have  her  bondsmen  relieved  by 
giving  her  own  bond  in  the  sum  of  $8,000,  which  was  granted.  She 
having  married  the  State's  most  valuable  witness,  and  the  other 
witnesses  being  widely  scattered,  it  is  not  likely  that  the  case  will 
ever  be  called.  The  accused  woman  displayed  remarkable  craft  in 
effecting  this  marriage,  but  neither  the  State  nor  the  b;  'degroom 
can  be  congratulated  on  the  affair.  If  the  woman  is  really  guilty, 
the  marriage  does  no  more  for  her  than  enable  her  to  evade  justice. 
It  is  not  so  in  the  scheme  of  salvation  provided  in  the  gospel  for 
guilty  sinners.  Their  union  with  Christ,  of  which  marriage  is  a 
type,  completely  satisfies  justice,  the  penalty  having  been  suffered 
by  the  innocent  Victim.  —  Christian  Herald. 


A  bride  of  an  hour  appeared  in  a  Circuit  Court  in  Illinois  last 
week,  as  an  applicant  for  a  divorce.  She  stated  that  about  three 
years  ago  a  young  man  became  a  suitor  for  her  hand,  and  she  ac 
cepted  him  on  condition  that  he  could  provide  her  with  a  home. 


MATCH-MAKING.  145 

The  young  man  seemed  to  have  some  difficulty  in  fulfilling  the  con 
dition,  and  the  engagement  went  on  from  month  to  month,  until 
the  lady  began  to  get  tired.  Recently,  however,  the  editor  informed 
her  that  a  home  was  ready  for  her,  and  the  marriage  was  celebra 
ted.  An  hour  afterward,  when  the  bride  wished  her  parents  fare 
well  and  was  about  to  depart  with  her  husband,  the  latter  told  her 
that  they  were  going  to  boarding,  and  that  he  had  been  unable  to 
provide  a  house  to  themselves.  She  was  much  incensed  at  this 
evasion,  and  said  she  did  not  consider  a  boarding-house  a  home. 
She  finally  refused  to  go  with  him,  and  taking  off  her  wraps  de 
clared  she  would  remain  at  home.  She  did  so,  and  commenced  a 
suit  for  divorce,  which  was  granted  her  last  week,  with  the  right  to 
resume  her  maiden  name.  So  ends  that  marriage,  in  which  then- 
was  evidently  little  love  on  either  side.  How  different  is  the  union 
between  Christ  and  His  Church,  which  Paul  describes  under  the 
type  of  a  marriage.  The  heavenly  Bridegroom  has  prepared  a 
mansion  for  His  bride  (John  14,  2),  and  she  is  ready  to  endure  pov 
erty  for  His  sake  (Rom.  5,  $-$).— Christian  Herald. 


-  - 


THE    CHOICE   OF   A   WIFE    IN    CLASSIC    TIMES. 

The  choice  of  a  wife  was  but  rarely  grounded  upon  affection, 
and  scarcely  ever  could  have  been  the  result  of  previous  acquaint 
ance  or  familiarity.  In  many  cases  a  father  chose  for  his  son  a 
bride  whom  the  latter  had  never  seen,  or  compelled  him  to  marry 
for  the  sake  of  checking  his  extravagance.  Nor  was  the  consent  of 
a  female  to  a  match  proposed  for  her  generally  thought  necessary  : 
she  was  obliged  to  submit  to  the  wishes  of  her  parents,  and  receive 
from  them,  it  might  be  a  stranger,  for  her  husband  and  lord.  The 
result  of  marriages  contracted  in  this  way  would  naturally  be  a 
want  of  confidence  and  mutual  understanding  between  husband  and 
wife,  until  they  became  better  acquainted  with,  and  accustomed  to 


146  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

each  other.  Xenophon  illustrates  this  with  much  naivete  in  the 
person  of  Ischomachus,  who  says  of  his  newly-married  wife,  "When 
at  last  she  was  manageable  and  getting  tame,  so  that  I  could  talk 
with  her,  I  askccl  her,''  £c.  —  Anthorfs  Greece. 


MARRIAGE    A    LOTTKRV. 

In  Afghanistan,  when  two  families  arc  negotiating  a  marriage, 
an  omen  is  consulted  in  the  following  manner  :  —  Several  slips  of 
paper  are  cut  up,  and  on  the  half  of  them  is  written  "  To  be,"  and 
on  the  other  half  "Not  to  be."  These  pieces  of  paper  are  placed 
under  a  praying  carpet,  and  the  anxious  father  devoutly  raises  his 
hands  in  prayer  to  God  for  guidance,  and  expresses  his  submission 
to  the  all-wise  decree  of  the  Almighty  in  the  matter  of  his  son's  or 
daughter's  marriage.  Then,  putting  his  hand  under  the  carpet,  he 
draws  out  a  paper.  If  on  it  should  be  written  "  To  be,"  he  thinks 
the  marriage  is  ordained  of  God  ;  if  "  Not  to  be,"  no  overture  or 
negotiation  will  be  listened  to.  Sometimes,  however,  the  interests 
of  State,  or  the  value  of  the  dowry,  or  the  termination  of  a  long 
standing  blood  feud  will  induce  the  pious  Chieftain  to  put  aside  the 
omen  as  having  been  influenced  by  the  powers  of  darkness. 


AVOID   VAIN    PRETEXTS    FOR    MARRIAGE. 

"'Tis  well  to  woe,  'tis  good  to  wed, 

For  so  the  world  has  done 
Since  myrtles  grew  and  roses  blew, 

And  morning  brought  the  sun  ; 

But  have  a  care,  ye  young  and  fair,  — 

Be  sure  ye  pledge  the  truth  ; 
Be  certain  that  your  love  will  wear 

Beyond  the  days  of  youth  ;  — 


MATCH-MAKING.  147 

For  if  ye  give  not  heart  for  heart, 

As  well  as  hand  for  hand, 
You'll  find  you've  played  the  "  unwise  "  part, 

And  "built  upon  the  sand." 

Tis  well  to  save,  'tis  well  to  have 

A  goodly  store  ot  gold  ; 
And  hold  enongh  of  shining  stuff, 

For  charity  is  cold  ; 

But  place  not  all  your  hope  and   trust 

In  what  the  deep  mine  brings  ; 
We  cannot  live  on  yellow  dust 

Unmixed  with  purer  things. 

And  he  who  piles  up  wealth  alone, 

Will  often  have  to  stand 
Beside  his  coffer  chest,  and  own, 

Tis  "  built  upon  the  sand." 

'Tis  good  to  speak  in  kindly  guise, 

And  soothe  where'er  we  can  ; 
Fair  speech  should  bind  the  human  mind, 

And  love  link  man  to  man. 

But  stay  not  at  the  gentle  words, 

Let  deeds  with  language  dwell  ; 
The  one  who  pities  starving  birds, 

Should  scatter  crumbs  as  well. 

The  mercy  that  is  warm  and  true 

Must  lend  a  helping  hand  ; 
For  those  who  talk,  yet  fail  to  do, 

But  "  build  upon  the  sand." 


PROPOSAL    AND    ESPOUSAL. 

On  the  other  hand  many  of  our  witty  youths  and  cunning 
nymphs,  of  the  marriageable  fair,  assign  very  vain  and  vapory 
leasons  for  preferring  the  single  state,  or  for  continuing  in  celibacy. 
11  They  don't  wish  to  bury  their  young  days."  "  When  persons  arc 
married  their  young  days  are  over."  They  "have  seen  enough  of 
that  in  others,"  &c. 


"The  duke  of  Nivernois  was  acquainted  with  the  Countess  dc 
Rochefort,  and  never  omitted  going  to  see  her  a  single  evenin^. 
As  she  \vas  a  widow  and  he  a  widower,  one  of  his  friends  observed 
to  him,  it  would  be  more  convenient  for  him  to  marry  that  lad}-. 
"  I  have  thought  so,"  said  he,  "but  one  thing  prevents  me  ;  in  thai 
case,  where  should  I  spend  my  evenings?" 


And  the  following  anecdote  is,  of  course,  in  everybody's  mouth 
of  a  good  father,  who  wished  to  dissuade  his  daughter  from  all 
thoughts  of  matrimony,  quoted  the  words  :'"  She  who  marries  doeth 
well,  but  she  who  marries  not,  docth  better."  The  daughter  meekly 
replied  :  "  Father,  I  am  content  to  do  well  ;  let  those  do  better 
who  can." 

~^|  ?=*/.— 

We  commend  that  young  lady  for  her  provident  wisdom  ;  and 
we  have  some  sympathy  with  a  mother  who  evinces  a  pardonable 
solicitude  for  her  daughters  in  this  direction,  the  following  para 
graph  notwithstanding  :  — 

"  It  must  be  owned  that  my  witc  laid  a  thousand  schemes  to 
entrap  him  ;  or,  to  speak  more  tenderly,  used  every  art  to  magnify 
the  merit  of  her  daughter.  If  the  cakes  at  tea  ate  short  and  crisp, 
they  were  made  by  Olivia  ;  if  the  gooseberry  wine  was  well-knit, 
the  gooseberries  were  of  her  gathering  ;  it  was  her  fingers  that  gave 
the  pickles  their  peculiar  green  ;  and  in  the  composition  of  a  pud- 


MATCH-MAKING.  149 

ding,  it  was  her  judgment  that  mixed  the  ingredients.  Then  the 
poor  woman  would  sometimes  tell  the  'Squire  that  she  thought  him 
and  Olivia  extremely  of  a  size,  and  would  bid  both  stand  up  to  see 
which  was  the  tallest.  These  instances  of  cunning,  which  she 
thought  impenetrable,  yet  which  everybody  saw  through,  were  very 
pleasing  to  our  benefactor,  who  gave  every  day  some  new  proofs  of 
his  passion,  which,  though  they  had  not  arisen  to  proposals  of  mar 
riage,  yet  we  thought  fell  but  little  short  of  it  ;  and  his  slowness 
was  attributed  sometimes  to  native  bashfulness,  and  sometimes  to 
his  fear  of  offending  his  uncle." 


STYLISH     LIVING. 

"  Friend  H—  -  why  have  you  never  married  ?" 

The  prompt  answer  was  :  "  I  cannot  afford  to.  The  girls  in  my 
stratum  of  society  nowadays  are  not  satisfied  without  diamonds, 
sealskins,  and  opera-tickets,  and  my  small  income  can't  afford  that. 

So  a  warm-hearted  man  travels  the  life-journey  alone,  when,  for 
his  own  sake,  and  for  some  good  woman's  sake,  he  ought  to  be 
mated.  What  H—  —  said,  half  in  sport,  has  a  serious  side  to  it. 
There  is  no  doubt  that  hundreds  of  young  men  deny  themselves  a 
wife,  because  they  cannot  support  a  wife  who  has  extravagant  no 
tions  of  living. 

Every  young  woman  is  not  'clean  daft"  on  the  subject  of 
stylish  living :  there  are  as  sensible  girls  left  in  this  world  as  there 
were  when  Solomon  wrote  the  Book  of  Proverbs.  A  friend  of  mine, 
who  had  just  learned  his  trade,  said  to  the  young  lady  he  loved  : 
"  You  are  having  offers  from  young  men  in  handsome  circumstances. 
If  you  marry  me  I  can  promise  you,  for  a  while,  nothing  better  than 
an  upper  story  of  a  boarding-house." 

She  admired  his  frankness,  and  had  sense  enough  to  know  that 
the  genuine  love  of  a  pure  and  noble  young  man  was  a  greater 


PROPOSAL   AND    ESPOUSAL. 

prize  than  a  parlor  carpeted  with  Wilton  and  a  wardrobe  filled  with 
satin  and  point  lace.  She  married  him,  and  he  fought  his  way  up 
to  become  a  prosperous  head  of  a  firm  in  Broadway.  If  she  had 
sold  her  maidenly  heart  for  money  she  would  have  cheated  herself 
deplorably.  There  is  but  one  single,  valid  motive  for  wedlock,  and 
that  is  pure,  old-fashioned  love — a  love  strong  enough  to  stand  any 
strain  and  to  bear  every  pressure. 

Probably  there  never  was  a  marital  union  that  did  not  involve 
a  single  particle  of  friction  ;  and  simply  because  no  man  is  a  demi 
god  and  no  woman  a  sinless  angel.  But  even  a  few  and  inevitable 
frictions  will  not  wear  on  the  "rivets"  if  they  arc  kept  well-oiled 
with  unselfish  love.  When  wedded  in  the  Lord,  and  wedded  for 
heaven,  they  can  bear  an  occasional  disagreement  of  taste  or  judg 
ment,  or  a  few  disappointments,  and  not  love  each  other  one  whit 
the  less.  What  cuts  a  wedding-ring  through  the  soonest  is  wilful 
neglect. — Dr.  T.  L.  Cuyler,  in  Brooklyn  Advance. 


"THE    MAN    THAT    HAS    THE    BUGGY'S    GIRL." 

She  was  only  twenty  months  old,  but,  like  every  other  child, 
constantly  surprising  her  parents  with  wise  sayings.  When  asked, 
"Whose  girl  is  Ella?"  the  invariable  answer  was,  "  Papa's  girl,"  or 
"  Mamma's  girl,"  according  to  which  parent  happened  to  be  more 
in  favor  for  the  moment. 

But  a  new  clement  had  come  into  the  family,  a  gay,  young  belle 
of  an  aunt,  whose  numerous  admirers  came  to  take  her  walking 

o 

riding  and  driving.  Ella's  rides  were  few,  and,  much  to  her  won 
der  and  chagrin,  she  was  never  invited.  She  was  enviously  watch 
ing  the  departing  aunt,  when  we  asked  her  to-day,  "  Whose  girl  is 
Ella  ?"  With  a  shrewd  twinkle  of  worldly  wisdom  lighting  up  her 
eyes,  she  answered,  "  The  man  that  has  the  buggy's  girl." 


MATCH  -MAKING.  I  5  I 

We  all  laughed.  Papa  moralized  a  little.  "  That's  the  way  of 
the  feminine  world  :  but  you  arc  learning  too  young  my  child  ;"and 
went  his  way  to  the  store. 


RICH     AND      POOR     MAN. 

"So  goes  the  world—  if  wealthy  you  may  call 
This,  friend,  that,  brother  ;  friends  and  brothers  all  ; 
Though  you  arc  worthless  —  witless  —  never  mind  it, 
You  may  have  been  a  stable-boy  —  what  then  ? 
'Tis  wealth,  good  sir,  makes  honorable  men. 
You  seek  respect,  no  doubt,  and  you  will  find  it. 

But,  if  you  are  poor,  heaven  help  you  !  though  your  sire 

Had  royal  blood  within  him,  and  though  you 

Possess  the  intellect  of  angels,  too, 

'Tis  all  in  vain  —  the  world  will  ne'er  inquire 

On  such  a  score.     Why  should  it  take  the  pains? 

'Tis  easier  to  weigh  purses,  sure,  than  brains. 

I  once  saw  a  poor  fellow,  keen  and  clever, 

Witty  and  wise  :  —  he  paid  a  man  a  visit, 

And  no  one  noticed  him,  and  no  one  ever 

Gave  him  a  welcome.  'Strange,'  cried  1,  'whence  is  it?" 

He  walked  on  this  side,  then  on  that, 

He  tried  to  introduce  a  social  chat  ; 

Now  here,  now  there,  in  vain  he  tried  ; 

Some  formally  and  frcczingly  replied,  and  some 

Said,  by  their  silence  —  '  Better  stay  at  home." 

A  rich  man  burst  the  door, 

As  Croesus  rich  ;   I'm  sure 

He  could  not  pride  himself  upon  his  wit, 


15-  PROPOSAL   AND    ESPOUSAL. 

And  as  for  wisdom,  he  had  none  of  it 
He  had  what's  better — he  had  wealth. 

What  a  confusion  1 — all  stand  up  erect— 
These — crowd  around  to  ask  him  of  his  health  ; 

These — bow  in  honest  duty  and  respect  ; 
And  these — arrange  a  sofa  or  a  chair, 
And  these — conduct  him  there. 
'  Allow  me,  sir,  the  honor  ;" — then  a  bow 
Down  to  the  earth — Is't  possible  to  show 
Meet  gratitude  for  such  kind  condescension  ? 

The  poor  man  hung  his  head, 

And,  to  himself,  he  said, 
'  This  i^>  indeed  beyond  my  comprehension  :' 

Then  looking  round, 

One  friendly  face  he  found, 

And  said,  '  Pray  tell  me  why  is  wealth  preferred, 
To  wisdom  ?' — '  That's  a  silly  question,  friend  !' 
Replied  the  other — 'have  you  never  heard, 

A  man  may  lend  his  store 

Of  gold,  or  silver  ore, 
But  wisdom — none  can  borrow,  none  can  lend  ?'  " 

SIR    \YALTER    RALKKlIl'S    VENAL    LETTER    TO    HIS    SON. 

"  Believe  thy  father  in  this,  and  print  it  in  thy  thought,  that 
what  virtue  soever  thou  hast,  be  it  ever  so  manifold,  if  thou  be  poor 
withal,  thou  and  thy  qualities  shall  be  despised.  Besides,  poverty 
is  oftentimes  sent  as  a  curse  of  God  ;  it  is  a  shame  amongst  men, 
an  imprisonment  of  the  mind,  a  vexation  of  every  worthy  spirit  ; 
thou  shalt  neither  hcip  thyself  nor  others  ;  thou  shalt  drown  theein 
all  thy  virtues,  having  no  means  to  shun  them  ;  thou  shalt  be  a 


MATCH-MAKING.  153 

burden  and  an  eyesore  to  thy  friends  ;  every  man  will  fear  thy 
company  ;  thou  shalt  be  driven  basely  to  beg  and  depend  on  others, 
to  flatter  unworthy  men,  to  make  dishonest  shifts  ;  and,  to  conclude 
poverty  provokes  a  man  to  do  infamous  and  detested  deeds.  Let 
vanity,  therefore,  or  persuasion,  draw  thee  to  that  waste  of  worldly 
miseries.  If  thou  be  rich,  it  will  give  thee  pleasure  and  health  ; 
keep  thy  mind  and  body  free,  save  thee  from  many  perils,  relieve 
thcc  in  thy  elder  years,  relieve  the  poor  and  thy  honest  friends,  and 
give  means  to  thy  posterity  to  live  and  defend  themselves  and  thine 
own  fame." 

Be  sure  thou  marry  for  love,  but  mind  that  thou  lovest  only 
what  is  lovely. 

Tears  are  shed  on  God's  altar  for  the  one  who  forsakes  his  first 

love. 

The  children  of  a  man  who  marries  for  money  will  prove  a  curse 

to  him. 

Love  thy  wife  as  thyself,  honor  her  more  than  thyself. 

He  who  loves  his  wife  as  himself,  and  honors  her  more  than 
himself,  will  train  his  children  properly  ;  he  will  meet  the  fulfilment 
of  the  verse,  and  thou  shalt  know  that  there  is  peace  in  thy  tent, 
and  thou  wilt  look  over  thy  habitation  and  miss  nothing. — Proverbs, 
chiefly  from  the  Talmud. 

"  A  good  wife  is  like  a  snail.  Why  ?  Because  she  keeps  in  her 
own  house.  A  good  wife  is  not  like  a  snail.  Why  ?  Because  she 
does  not  carry  her  all  on  her  back.  A  good  wife  is  like  a  town 
clock.  Why  ?  Because  she  keeps  good  time.  A  good  wife  is  not 
like  a  town  clock.  Why  ?  Because  she  does  not  speak  so  loud 
that  all  the  town  can  hear  her.  A  good  wife  is  like  an  echo.  Why? 
Because  she  speaks  when  spoken  to.  A  good  wile  is  not  like  an 
echo.  Why  ?  Because  she  does  not  tell  all  she  hears. 


154  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

A    ROYAL    MATCHMAKER   OUTWITTED. 

Going  one  day  from  Potsdam  to  Berlin,  Frederick,  writes  Col 
onel  Brackenbury,  in  his  biography  of  the  Prussian  monarch,  saw 
coming  towards  him  in  the  opposite  direction  a  magnificent  girl, 
young,  handsome,  and  of  good  figure,  superb  in  the  number  of 
inches.  He  was  at  once  struck  with  admiration  for  her,  stopped  to 
talk,  and  found  that  she  was  unmarried,  and  was  on  her  way  from 
Berlin  to  her  Saxon  home.  "Then,"  said  Frederick  William,  "you 
will  be  passing  the  gates  of  Potsdam,  and  will  no  doubt  give  this 
note  to  the  commandant,  receiving  a  dollar  for  your  trouble."  But 
women,  even  when  tall,  are  not  easily  outwitted.  The  girl  knew 
the  king  by  sight  and  reputation,  and,  knowing  that  to  refuse  the 
note  would  probably  bring  her  a  shower  of  blows  from  the  ratan. 
accepted  the  commission.  Arriving  near  the  gate  of  Potsdam,  she 
found  there  a  little  weazened  hag,  to  whom  she  entrusted  the  de 
livery  of  the  letter,  giving  the  dollar  with  it.  Forthwith  she  sped 
away  towards  home.  The  commandant  opened  the  note,  and  found 
himself  ordered  to  marry  the  bearer  to  a  certain  gigantic  Irish 
grenadier  named  Macdoll  (?  McDowall).  He  rubbed  his  eyes,  but 
there  could  be  no  doubt  about  the  clearness  of  the  command.  The 
grenadier  was  sent  for,  and  then  began  a  curious  scene.  The  man 
was  in  despair.  Such  a  mate  for  one  of  his  thews  and  sinews 
seemed  a  horrible  mockery.  The  proposed  wife,  on  the  contrary, 
was  quite  ready  to  submit  herself  to  the  orders  of  the  king.  There 
was  no  escape  ;  to  refuse  further  would  be  flat  mutiny,  and  the 
soldier  was  actually  obliged  to  obey.  The  mistake  was  not  discov 
ered  till  the  next  morning,  when  Frederick,  finding  himself  thwart 
ed  in  his  designs  for  the  development  of  giants  in  Germany,  con 
sented  to  the  divorce  of  the  ill-matched  couple." 


A  young  girl,  who  seems  to  know  what   she  is  talking  about, 
objects  to  the  criticisms  which  make  it  appear  that  those  of  her  sex 


MATCH-MAKING.  !55 

who  arc  true  and  womanly  arc  scarce  ;  and  she  wishes  to  know 
whether  it  is  necessary,  when  a  young  lady  is  receiving  company 
in  the  parlor,  that  she  shall  lug  in  beefsteaks,  washtubs,  scrubbing 
brushes  and  smoothing  irons,  in  order  to  convince  a  lot  of  ninnies 
of  young  men  that  she  can  work  in  the  kitchen. 

My  daughter,  when  you  note  that  the  man  who  wants  to  marry 
you  is  just  too  awfully  anxious  to  learn  whether  you  can  bake  a 
loaf  of  bread  or  wash  a  shirt  with  Chinese  dexterity,  before  you 
close  the  negotiations  do  you  just  fly  around  and  ascertain  if  that 
man  is  either  able  or  willing  to  earn  enough  flour  to  bake  a  biscuit, 
and  if  he  has  paid  for  the  shirt  he  wants  you  to  wash.  Nine  times 
out  of  ten,  daughter,  the  man  who  only  wants  to  marry  a  house 
keeper  can  be  kept  more  economically  in  the  workhouse  than  he 
can  in  your  father's  house.  —  Burdette. 


A   FRIENDLY   WARNING. 

Ye  maidens  be  not  "  thralls," 
By  Mammon  bought  and  sold 

Nor  long  for  marble  halls- 
While  love  is  stark  and  cold. 

Consider,  ere  you  say, 
The  acquiesing  "  yes,"- 

The  gold  that  makes  you  gay, 
May  bring  you  sore  distress. 

The  body's  more  than  meat  : 
And  life  is  more  than  style  ; 

Hard  toil  with  love  is  sweet, 
Compared  with  splendid  guile. 

The  classic  lantern  take 
And  seek  an  honest  man  : 


[56  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

The  horny  hand  may  make 
More  bliss  than  riches  can. 

Yon  lorclling,  puffed  with  pride, 

Forbid  to  charm  your  eye  ; 
He'll  win  you,  then  deride, 

And  pass  you  heedless  by. 

I  see  a  shining  net 

Prepared  for  beauty,  sweet  , 
Back  !  back  !  !   I  say,  nor  let 

That  snare  entice  your  fccU 

The  matrimonial  yoke 

May  prove  the  lariat's  noose  : 
And  fairest  "  gentle  folk," 

Will  foulest  vice-traps  use. 

Look  well  before  you  leap  ; 

The  gates  lock  fast  behind  : 
Your  heart  bid  prudence  keep, 

And  grace  control  your  mind. 

PLAYING    ON    THE    GRIDIRON. 

The  Hebrew  Leader  tells  a  good  story  and  appends  a  moral  : 
"  A  young  lady  of  big  accomplishments  (and  no  pride)  in  the 
absence  of  the  servant,  stepped  to  the  door  on  the  ringing  which 
announced  a  visit  from  one  of  her  admirers.  On  entering,  the  beau 
glancing  at  the  harp  and  piano  which  stood  in  the  apartment,  ex 
claimed,  'I  thought  I  heard  music  ;  on  which  instrument  were  you 
performing,  Miss?'  'On  the  gridiron,  sir,  with  an  accompaniment 
of  the  frying  pan!'  she  replied  ;  'my  mother  is  without  help,  and 


MATCH-MAKING.  157 

she  says  I  must  learn  to  finger  these  instruments  sooner  or  later, 
and  I  have  this  day  commenced  taking  a  course  of  lessons."  This 
is  part  of  the  Leader's  Moral :  "  Those  who  are  brought  up  to  work 
in  the  country,  and  go  to  the  city  and  make  a  fortune,  indulge  in 
the  false  pride  of  training  their  children  to  despise  labor,  which  was 
the  birthright  of  their  parents,  and  make  it  a  point  to  decry  honest 
toil,  in  which  they  were  themselves  reared,  and  to  which  all  their 
relatives  are  still  devoted.  This  is  a  mushroom  aristocracy  and  the 
most  contemtible  of  all." 


THE    MODERN    F.ELLE 

"She  sits  in  an  elegant  parlor, 

And  rocks  in  her  easy  cha'r  • 
She  is  clad  in  silks  and  satins, 

And  jewels  are  in  her  hair  ; 
She  winks  and  giggles  and  simpers 

And  simpers  and  giggles  and  winks  ; 
And  though  she  talks  but  little, 

'Tis  a  good  deal  more  than  she  thinks. 

She  lies  abed  in  the  morning 

Till  near  the  hour  of  noon, 
Then  comes  down  snapping  and  snarling 

Because  she  was  called  so  soon  ; 
Her  hair  is  still  in  papers, 

Her  cheeks  still  fresh  with  paint — • 
Remains  of  her  last  night's  blushes, 

Before  she  intended  to  faint. 

She  dotes  upon  men  unshaven, 
And  men  with  c  flowing  hair  ;' 

She's  eloquent  over  moustaches, 
They  give  such  a  foreign  air. 


158  1-KOl'OSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

She  talks  of  Italian  music, 

And  falls  in  love  with  the  moon  ; 

And  if  a  mouse  were  to  meet  her, 
She  would  sink  away  in  a  swoon. 

Her  feet  arc  so  very  little, 

Her  hands  are  so  very  white, 
Her  jewels  so  very  heavy, 

And  her  head  so  very  light  ; 
Her  color  is  made  cf  cosmetics, 

(Though  this  she  will  never  own)  ; 
Her  body  is  mostly  of  cotton, 

Her  heart  is  made  wholly  of  stone. 

She  falls  in  love  with  a  fellow 
Who  swells  with  a  foreign  air-, 

He  marries  her  for  her  money, 
She  marries  him  for  his  hair  ! 

One  of  the  very  best  matches — 
Both  arc  well  mated  in  life  ; 

She's  got  a  fool  for  a  husband, 


He's  got  a  fool  for  a  wife  !' 


—  Christian  Guardian. 


ADVICE    TO    CELIBATES. 


Delay  doth  oftentimes  prevent  the  performance  of  good  things,  for  the 
wings  of  man's  life  are  plumed  with  the  feathers  of  death.— SIR  WALTER 
RALEIGH. 


HERE  is  an  old  proverb,  familiar  to  all,  which  says 
"  delays  are  dangerous."  And  this  is  no  less  true  in 
matters  of  love  than  in  the  common  affairs  of  life. 
Hesitation  grows  on  a  man.  Diffidence,  like  every 
thing  else,  increases  with  nourishment.  Give  it  no  place. 
Now  the  tide  of  life  is  at  the  flood.  Lose  not  the  up-going 
stream  ;  but  "  launch  out  into  the  deep."  Let  nothing  prevent  you. 
Head  winds  don't  last  forever.  The  skilful  seaman  tacks  about  and 
makes  all  breezes  helpful.  "  He  that  observeth  the  wind  shall  not 
sow  ;  and  he  that  regardeth  the  clouds  shall  not  reap."  Set  sail, 
young  man.  Every  captain  needs  a  mate.  It  is  dreary  work  sail 
ing  alone.  We  never  see  a  bachelor,  but  we  seem  to  hear  the  wail 
of  the  solitary,  sea-tossed  : 

"Alone,  alone,  all,  all  alone  ! 
Alone  on  the  wide,  wide  sea  !" 

Don't  go  forth  on  the  untried  deep  without  company.  Commence 
your  voyage  in  a  craft  with  a  double  name.  If  not  the  twin-sign 
of  the  heathen,  "  Castor  and  Pollux," — the  name  of  the  Apostle's 
home-going  boat — yet  under  the  less  classic,  but  more  Christian 


1 60  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

name  of  "  Thomas  and  Mary)"  or  •'  Richard  and  Sarah,"  as  the  case 
may  be.  Come,  friend,  pluck  up  heart.  Reason  urges  it.  Custom 
favors  it.  Instinct  prompts  it,  and  nought  but  self  forbids  it. 

Xo\v  is  the  time, 

With  youth  in  its  prime. 


"  Begin,  be  bold,  and  venture  to  be  wise  : 

lie  who  defers  this  work  from  day  to  day, 

Does  on  a  river's  bank  expecting  stay, 

Till  the  whole  stream  that  stopped  him  shall  be  gone, 

Which  runs,  and  as  it  runs,  forever  shall  run  on." 

O,  fair  is  youth's  bright  morning.  Hope  beguiles  you  in  the 
distant  horizon.  Hope!  of  which,  in  its  Christian  acceptation, 
Adams  says  :  "  Hope  is  the  sweetest  friend  that  ever  kept  a  dis 
tressed  soul  company  ;  it  beguiles  the  tecliousncss  of  the  way  and 
all  the  miseries  of  our  pilgrimage.  It  tells  the  soul  such  sweet 
stories  of  the  succeeding  joys  ;  what  comforts  there  arc  in  heaven  : 
what  peace,  what  triumphs,  marriage  songs  and  hallelujahs  there 
are  in  that  country  whither  she  is  drifting,  that  she  goes  merrily 
away  with  her  present  burden." 

Youth  is  buoyant  with  cxpcctatation,  bright  with  animating 
hope.  Old  age  (so  far  as  this  life  goes),  has  done  with  it.  Know, 
then,  your  time,  ye  youthful  band,  and  "  whatsoever  your  hands  find 
to  do,  do  it  with  your  might." 

When  you  sec  a  duty,  do  it; 

When  you  find  life's  beauty,  know  it ; 

Joy  is  offered,  don't  forego  it. 

And  do  not  mourn  away  your  time,  and  lose  one  half  the  day  of 
most  inviting  opportunity  at  the  instance  of  your  own  fruitless  in 
decision,  as  did  he,  of  whom  himself  hath  sung : 


MATCH-MAKING.  i6l 

"  I  reach  a  duty,  yet  I  do  it  not, 

And  therefore  see  no  higher." 
My  view  is  darkened,  and  another  spot 

Seen  on  my  moral  sun. 

For,  be  the  duty  light  as  angel's  flight, 

Fulfil  it,  and  a  higher  will  arise, 
E'en  from  its  ashes.     Duty  is  infinite. 

Receding  as  the  skies. 

And  thus  it  is  the  purest  must  deplore 
Their  want  of  purity.     As  fold  by  fold, 

In  duties  done,  falls  from  their  eyes,  the  more 
Of  duty  they  behold 

— Robert  LeigJiton. 


The  inconstant  man  changes  his  apparel  as  fast  as  his  thought 
As  a  verb,  he  knows  only  the  present  tense.  He  resolves  not  tc 
resolve.  He  knows  not  what  he  doth  hold.  He  opens  his  mine 
to  receive  notions,  as  one  opens  his  palm  to  take  a  handful  of  water 
he  hath  very  much  if  he  could  hold  it.  He  is  sure  to  die,  but  know- 
not  what  religion  to  die  in.  In  a  controverted  point,  he  holds  with 
the  last  reasoner  he  either  heard  or  read.  He  will  rather  take  dross 
for  gold  than  try  it  in  the  furnace.  He  receives  many  judgments. 
retains  none  ;  embraces  so  many  faiths  that  he  is  little  better  than 
an  infidel.  He  is  almost  weary  of  the  sun  for  perpetual  shining. 
He  is  full  of  business  at  church,  a  stranger  at  home,  a  sceptic 
abroad,  everywhere  a  fool. — Adams. 


The  best  standard  of  life  is  to  adopt  a  course  which  it  would  be 
safe  for  all  men  to  follow,  not  consulting  our  own  ease  or  tastes  or 
pleasant  inclinations,  but  asking  what  is  wisest,  truest,  best.  It  is 
easy  to  cajole  one's  self  into  the  belief  that  our  own  way  is  the  most 
excellent  and  praiseworthy  ;  to  think  that  we  "  are  the  men,  and 


1 62  PROPOSAL  AND   ESPOUSAL. 

that  wisdom  shall  die  with  us  ;"  even  going  so  far  as  to  sing  in  our 
bachelor  dungeons,  and  to  dote  on  that  more  specious  form  of  soli 
tary  confinement  known  by  the  name  of  '•  single  blessedness  ;"  but 
in  the  end  we  shall  find  •'  it  is  not  good  for  man  to  be  alone,"  even 
though  at  the  present  he  may  put  a  bold  face  on  the  matter,  and  go 
forth  in  life  whistling  the  airs  of  freedom  or  singing  the  song  of 
the  tramp  : 

"  On  the  tramp,  with  my  bag  on  my  bacu, 

I'm  free  as  a  lord  or  a  king  ; 
I  am  ready  to  work  when  I  can, 

And  when  I  can't  work  I  can  sing ! 

The  green  lanes,  and  the  fields,  and  the  hills 

Arc  ever  my  dearest  delight- 
Counting  stars,  as  a  nun  counts  her  beads, 

I  drop  off  to  slumber  at  night  ! 

I  am  up  with  the  morn,  and  a-foot 
While  town-folks  are  sleeping  in  bed, 

Gentle  birds  sing  their  grace  to  my  meals — 
I've  never  yet  wanted  for  bread  ! 

The  bustle  and  noise  of  the  city 

My  thoughts  and  my  feelings  confuse  ; 

And  I'm  never  so  happy  a  man 

As  when  I  can  tramp  it — and  muse  !"' 


sfis 


O  Geldcn  jok«  ! — round,  light  aad  fair  — 
Which  links  iu  oue  a  wedded  pair  ! 
How  sweet  tbe  burdeu  lore  dotu  bear  ; 
How  bright  the  badge  fair  lovers  wear  ! 


- 


IS  oftentimes  said  of  love,  that  it  is  not  under  the 
control  of  the  will,  nor  at  the  option  of  any  one, 
but  that  it  simply  "goes  where  it  is  sent."  We  would 
that  some  oracle  would  tell  us  by  what  power,  and  by 
whom  it  is  sent.  We  certainly  cannot  for  a  moment 
allow  that  the  <;  tender  passion,"  as  we  see  it  to-day,  is 
ever  and  always  under  the  guidance  of  a  divine  will,  or  that  it  can 
boast  a  celestial  origin.  It  is  too  wayward,  carnal,  headstrong  for 
that  ;  too  inconstant,  capricious,  contradictory,  variable  and  pur 
blind  to  be  of  heavenly  birth.  Well  may  Cupid  be  painted  as  a 
child,  and  with  wings,  for  who  knows  what  trick  he  will  play  next, 
or  whither  he  will  fly,  or  where  alight  ?  Behold  how  love  dotes  in 
the  old  !  How  it  vapors  in  the  young  !  How  it  vaunts  itself  in 
middle  age  !  How  it  unites  the  dissimilar  !  How  it  couples  the 
incongruous  !  How  it  merges  the  incompatible  !  How  it  babbles 
all  it  knows  in  Samson  !  How  it  loses  its  head  in  Solomon  !  How 
it  forgets  itself  (to  use  a  euphemism)  in  David  !  How  it  changes 
color  and  suddenly  transforms  itself  in  Ammon  !  How,  on  the 
other  hand,  it  makes  the  time  to  go  in  Jacob  !  How  it  sports  itself 
in  even  the  venerable  Isaace  !  How  it  creates  a  world  of  its  own, 
and  crowds  its  universe  into  the  compass  of  one  fair  object,  even  as 
a  certain  philosopher  conceived  that  the  whole  globe  might  be  com 
pressed  into  the  dimensions  of  a  nutshell.  Love  knows  no  law, 
brooks  no  restraint,  heeds  no  counsel,  feels  no  age  ! 

105 


KVERY  MAN  ORIGINAL  IN   LOVE-MAKING. 


ROBABLY  there  is  no  instance,"  said  Sir  Arthur  Helps, 
"  in  which  any  two   lovers  have   made  love  in  exactly 
x^~      the  same  way  as  any  two  other  lovers  since  the   world 
/£     began." 


.      •••*,     XJ 

•fj^  Cobbett's  wife  is  said   to  have  caught   him   by  the 

grace  with  which  she  used  the  wash-tub  ;  but  she  was, 
it  is  said,  never  known  to  use  it  after  the  wedding. 

Charlemagne's  secretary  was  caught  by  a  snow-storm  while 
courting  the  Emperor's  daughter  at  midnight,  and  she  carried  him 
home  on  her  back,  so  that  his  footsteps  should  not  be  traced.  The 
Emperor  heard  of  it,  took  it  in  good  part,  and  gave  the  fair  burden- 
carrier  to  her  precious  "  load." 


It  did  not,  unfortunately,  fare  so  well  with  one  of  Crom 
well's  servants,  whom  he  caught  on  his  knees  before  his  august 
daughter,  pleading  for  her  love,  and  who,  on  sternly  demanding 
"  what  this  all  meant,"  was  informed  by  the  trembling  suppliant, 
that  he  was  merely  beseeching  her  ladyship  to  intercede  for  him 
with  one  of  her  maids-in-waiting.  The  grim  Protector  at  once 
summoned  the  lady  in  question  into  his  presence,  and  asked  her  if 
she  had  any  objection  to  receiving  the  gentleman's  attentions,  and 

ICC 


PROPOSAL.  167 

she,  finding  it  a  "  chance  "  far  beyond  her  reasonable  expectations, 
replied  in  the  negative  ;  and,  lo  !  the  match  and  marriage  were 
made  on  "  short  orders  ;"  the  gruff  Commonwealth  himself  superin 
tending  the  proceedings,  and  looking  most  determinedly  on. 


"  In  olden  times  it  was  the  fashion  for  a  suitor  to  go  ciown  on  his 
knees  to  a  lady  when  he  asked  her  to  become  his  wife,  which,  with 
very  stout  gentlemen,  was  an  uncomfortable  proceeding.  The  way 
in  which  Daniel  Webster  proposed  to  Miss  Fletcher  was  more 
modern,  being  at  the  same  time  neat  and  poetic.  Like  many  other 
lovers,  he  was  caught  holding  a  skein  of  thread  or  wool,  which  the 
lady  had  been  unravelling.  '  Grace,'  said  he,  '  we  have  been  unty- 
intr  knots.  Let  us  see  if  we  can  tie  one  which  will  not  untie  in  a 

o 

lifetime.'  With  a  piece  of  tape  he  fashioned  half  a  true-lover's 
knot,  Miss  Fletcher  perfected  it,  and  a  kiss  put  the  seal  to  the  sym 
bolical  bargain.  Most  men  arc  more  straightforward  and  matter- 
of-fact." 

"Richard  Stecle  wrote  to  the  lady  of  his  heart:  'Dear  Mrs. 
Scurlock  (there  were  no  misses  in  those  days),  I  am  tired  of  calling 
you  by  that  name,  therefore  say  a  day  when  you  will  take  that  of 
madam.  Your  most  devoted,  humble  servant,  Richard  Stecle.'  She 
fixed  the  day  accordingly,  and  Steeled  her  name  instead  of  her 
heart  to  the  suitor." 


"  The  celebrated  preacher,  Whitfield,  proposed  marriage  to  a 
young  lady  in  a  very  cool  manner  —  as  though  Whitfield  meant  a 
field  of  ice.  He  addressed  a  letter  to  her  parents,  without  consult 
ing  the  maiden,  in  which  he  said  that  they  need  not  be  at  all  afraid 
of  offending  him  by  a  refusal,  as  he  thanked  God  he  was  quite  free 
from  the  passion  called  love.  Of  course  the  lady  did  not  conclude 
that  this  field,  however  white,  was  the  field  for  her." 


1 68  PROPOSAL    AND    ESPOUSAL. 

"The  brothers  Jacob  and  William  Grimm,  whose  fairy  storic.^ 
are  doubtless  kno\vn  to  man)-  of  our  readers,  were  exceedingly  at- 
tac'ied  to  each  other,  and  had  no  desire  to  be  married.  But  it  was 
thought  proper  by  their  friends  that  one  of  them  should  become  a 
husband,  and  Jacob  being  the  elder,  it  was  agreed  that  he  should 
be  the  one  to  enter  the  bonds  of  matrimony.  A  suitable  lady  was 
found,  but  Jacob  declined  to  do  the  courting,  requesting  William  to 
act  as  his  agent.  William  consented,  but  soon  found  that  he  was 
in  love,  and  wanted  the  lady  fer  himself.  He  could  not  think, 
however,  of  depriving  his  brother  of  such  a  treasure,  and  knew  not 
how  to  act.  An  aunt  kindly  relieved  him  in  his  difficulty  by  telling 
Jacob,  who  willingly  resigned  the  damsel  to  his  brother,  and  went 
out  -.1  the  way  till  she  had  been  made  Mrs.  William  Grimm." 


"  A  Scotch  beadle  was  the  one  who  popped  the  question  in  the 
grimmest  manner.  He  took  his  sweetheart  into  the  graveyard,  and 
showing  her  a  dark  corner,  said,  '  Mary,  my  folks  lie  there.  Would 
you  like  to  lie  there,  Mary  ?'  Mary  wras  a  sensible  lassie,  and  ex 
pressed  her  willingness  to  obtain  the  right  to  be  buried  near  the 
beadle's  relations  Ijv  uniting  herself  to  him  in  wedlock." 


"  A  similar  unromantic  view  of  the  subject  was  taken  by  another 
Scotch  maiden.  Upon  her  lover  remarking,  '  I  think  I'll  marry 
thcc,  Jean,"  she  replied,  '  Mai  ,  Jock,  I  would  be  mucklc  oblecged 
to  ye  if  ye  would  !'  " 

--  •  --  «!.—  11^      I 


now   TIII-:    KARKNNS   PROPOSE. 


"Among  the  Karcnns  of  Burmah,  marriages  must  accompany 
the  celebration  of  funeral  rites.  These  arc  attended  by  the  mar 
riageable  women  and  eligible  bachelors  of  the  village  in  which  the 


PROPOSAL.  169 

dead  person  has  lived.  Spectators  of  both  sexes  come  in  great 
numbers  ;  but  their  proceedings  are  limited  to  criticism  and  the 
picking  up  of  ideas  for  future  attempts  of  their  own  in  the  matri 
monial  market.  There  arc,  of  course,  numbers  of  old  people  pres 
ent,  but  whether  they  do  honor  to  the  obsequies  of  their  former 
neighbor,  in  what  Europeans  consider  the  orthodox  way,  is  not  ap 
parent.  It  appears  more  likely  that  they  come  to  observe  the 
doings  of  their  young  charges. 

The  marriageable  young  men  and  maidens  separate  into  two 
chairs,  and  seats  themselves  on  opposite  sides  of  the  remains,  all  of 
them  being  dressed  in  their  gayest.  The  opening  of  the  funeral 
service  begins  with  a  chorus  by  the  men,  celebrating  the  beauties  of 
the  Karenn  maiden  in  general,  her  charms  of  movement  and  mod 
esty  of  carriage.  The  girls  respond  in  a  falsetto  of  the  usual  char 
acter,  calmly  accepting  the  eulogy  of  their  graces,  and  making 
delicate  allusions  to  the  fifteen  hundred  desires,  to  some  of  which  it 
is  not  impossible  they  may  succumb. 

This  preliminary  being  over,  the  actual  business  begins,  and  the 
young  bachelors,  each  in  his  turn,  delivers  himself  of  a  love-stricken 
song  to  the  damsel,  whether  previously  known  or  not,  who  has  won 
his  affections. 

The  matter  of  the  proposals  thus  publicly  made  is  not,  as  a 
rule,  very  violently  original.  The  girl  is  compared  to  a  flower,  to 
the  hare  in  the  moon,  to  the  stars,  to  a  rosary  of  emeralds  or  rubies, 
to  a  maid  of  the  palace.  It  is  asserted  that  she  would  ruin  the 
peace  of  mind  of  a  hermit,  and  bring  him  back  to  sober  house 
keeping.  No  painter  could  copy  her  charms  ;  his  picture  would  be 
a  failure,  and  he  would  be  infallibly  knocked  in  the  head  by  the 
singer  for  his  impudence  in  venturing  so  hopeless  an  attempt.  The 
once  rejected  suitor  usually  adopts  the  plaintive  line  ;  he  is  so  dis 
turbed  in  mind  that  he  can  neither  eat  nor  drink  ;  he  perspires  so 
much  with  agitation  that  he  will  die  before  morning ;  he  is  like  the 


170  PROPOSAL   AND    ESPOUSAL. 

water-lily  that  fades  away  when  the  sun  shines  upon  it  ;  he  is  like 
the  sun  itself,  for  he  cannot  rest  in  peace,  but  roams  about  vaunting 
the  praises  of  his  love  through  all  the  city  and  country  side.  It 
may  naturally  be  thought  that  the  girls  thus  publcly  wooed  ought 
to  feel  embarrassed.  If  they  are,  Karenn  maidens  show  more  than 
feminine  tact  in  keeping  concealed  whatever  awkwardness  they 
may  feel.  They  look  as  if  they  liked  the  situation,  rather  than 
otherwise. 

The  answering  of  the  proposal  is  a  different  matter.  Ladies  all 
the  world  over,  in  such  circumstances,  give  answers  which,  common 
report  says,  ought  not  to  be  taken  too  literally.  It  is  the  same  with 
the  Karenn  belle.  .  Her  answer,  as  a  rule,  is  stereotyped.  All  the 
praise  is  appropriated  as  little  more  than  her  just  due.  She  de 
clares  that  it  is  a  shameful  thing  not  to  be  married,  but  it  is  a  worse 
matter  still  to  be  divorced  afterwards,  '  to  be  like  a  dress  that  is 
washed  ;'  but  she  will  do  what  she  is  bid,  though  she  cannot  think 
of  being  aught  but  afraid  of  men  yet,  all  of  which  makes  the  aspir 
ing  lover  grin  with  satisfaction.  Occasionally,  however,  a  sprightly 
damsel  strikes  out  a  line  for  herself.  She  hints  that  the  song 
directed  to  her  is  rather  niggardly  in  its  praises.  She  is  not  going 
to  sell  herself  under  cost  price.  If  people  like  to  say  she  is  mad 
after  a  husband,  let  them  say  so.  She  is  not  like  day  dim  with  the 
heat-haze,  nor  like  a  diamond  that  has  lost  the  foil  below  to  set  it 
off,  not  like  a  peacock's  tail  dragged  in  the  wet,  the  signification  of 
which  is  that  the  wrong  man  has  proposed  to  her,  and  the  lucky 
swain  will  be  a  foolish  man  if  her  eyes  do  not  let  him  know  that  his 
suing  will  have  a  pleasanter  answer. 

Xow  and  then  a  man  gets  a  direct  refusal,  and  as  it  is  difficult 
to  invest  a  blunt  '  No '  with  melodious  merit,  the  rejection  is  couched 
in  somewhat  the  following  fashion  : — '  Come  to  me  when  the  full 
moon  appears  on  the  first  day  of  the  month.  Come  dressed  in  clothes 
that  have  never  been  stitched,  and  dress  and  comb  before  you  wake. 


PROPOSAL.  I  7  I 

Eat  your  rice  before  it  is  cooked,  and  come  before  daylight.'  Such 
episodes  are,  however,  rare,  and  generally  occur  through  a  swain's 
applying  for  the  hand  of  one  who  is  generally  known  to  be  reserv 


ing  herself  for  some  other." 


ONE    FORM    OF    PROPOSAL   AMONG   THE    INDIANS. 

Among  certain  tribes  of  the  Indians,  the  following  manner  of 
proposing  is  observed.  If  a  young  man  resolves  to  marry,  his  rela 
tives  and  the  minister  advise  him  to  a  young  woman  of  the  tribe. 
He  enters  the  wigwam  where  she  is  and  looks  upon  her.  If  he 
likes  her  appearance  he  tosses  a  chip  or  stick  into  her  lap,  which 
she  takes,  and  with,  a  reserved  side  look  views  the  person  who  sent 
it,  yet  handles  the  chip  with  admiration,  as  though  she  wondered 
whence  it  came.  If  she  likes  him  she  throws  the  chip  at  him  with 
a  modest  smile,  and  then  nothing  is  wanting  but  a  ceremony  with 
the  minister  to  consummate  the  nuptial  tie.  But  if  she  dislikes  her 
suitor,  she  with  a  surly  countenance  throws  her  chip  aside,  and  he 
comes  no  more. 

'•  Love,"  says  one,  "  rules  a  kingdom  of  contrasts.  Heine,  dream 
ing  of  angels,  marries  a  grisette.  Freytag  turns  from  a  court  to  a 
kitchen.  Bacon,  master  of  philosophy,  is  joined  to  a  woman  with 
a  loud  voice,  and  dressed  like  a  chamber-maid  out  on  a  holiday. 
And  what  is  more  pitiable  than  Keat's  pouring  out  all  the  typical 
language  of  his  soul  at  the  feet  of  Fanny  Brawn  ?  He  a  poet,  she 
a  common-place.  Idolatry  on  the  one  hand  ;  a  mixture  of  vanity 
and  curiosity  on  the  other." 


In  Northern  Siberia  if  a  young  native  desires  to  marry,  he  goes 
to  the  father  of  the  girl  of  his  choice  and  a  price  is  agreed  upon, 
one-half  of  which  is  then  paid  down.  The  prospective  son-in-law 


PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

at  once  takes  up  his  residence  with  the  family  of  his  lady  love,  and 
resides  with  them  a  year.  If  at  the  end  of  a  year  he  still  desires  to 
marry  the  girl,  he  can  pay  the  other  half,  and  they  are  married  on 
the  next  visit  of  the  priest.  If  he  does  not  want  to  marry  he  need 
not,  and  simply  loses  the  half  he  paid  at  the  start. 


LEGAL   COURTSHIP. 


Mr.  Chitty  relates  an  anecdote  of  a  young  attorney  who  had 
been  carrying  on  a  correspondence  with  a  young  lady,  in  which  he 
had  always,  as  he  thought,  expressed  himself  with  the  greatest  cau 
tion.  Finding,  however,  that  he  did  not  perform  what  he  had  led 
the  lad)-  to  believe  that  he  would,  she  brought  an  action  for  breach 
of  promise  of  marriage  against  him.  When  his  letters  were  pro 
duced  on  the  trial,  it  appeared  that  he  had  always  concluded  _  "this, 
thont  prejudice,  yours  faithfully,  C.  D."  The  judge  facetiously 
ieft  it  to  the  jury  to  determine  whether  these  concluding  words, 
being  from  an  attorney,  did  not  mean  that  he  did  not  intend  any 
prejudice  to  the  lady  ;  and  the  jury  found  accordingly. 


A    UNIQUE    PROPOSAL. 

A  gentleman  had  long  been  paying  attention  to  a  young  lady 
whom  he  was  very  anxious  to  marry,  but  could  not  screw  his  cour 
age  to  the  sticking  point.  At  last  he  resolved  to  take  the  first  op 
portunity  which  presented  itself  of  asking  the  momentous  question. 
No  sooner,  however,  had  he  formed  this  resolution  than  fortune 
seemed  to  desert  him.  He  often  met  the  fair  one,  but  never  could 
get  the  chance  of  speaking  to  her  alone.  Driven  to  desperation,  he 
one  day  succeeded  in  accomplishing  his  purpose  at  a  dinner-party. 
Now  it  is  very  easy  to  hold  converse  with  the  person  who  sits  next 
to  you  at  a  dinner-party,  and  abstain  from  mentioning  names  ;  but 
in  this  case  the  lady  was  on  the  opposite  side  of  the  table.  He  was, 
however,  equal  to  the  occasion,  and,  tearing  out  a  leaf  from  a  pocket 


PROPOSAL.  173 

Dook,  wrote  on  it,  under  cover  of  the  table,  "  Will  you  be  my  wife  ? 
Write  'Yes5  or  '  No'  at  the  foot  of  this." 

Calling  a  servant,  he  whisperod  to  him  to  take  the  note — which 
of  course  was  folded  up — to  the  '•  lady  in  blue  opposite." 

The  servant  did  as  he  was  directed  ;  and  the  gentleman,  in  an 
agony  of  suspense,  watched  him  give  it  to  the  lady,  and  fixed  his 
eyes,  with  badly  disguised  eagerness,  to  try  to  judge  from  her  ex 
pression  how  the  quaintly-made  offer  was  received. 

He  had  forgotten  one  thing — namely,  that  ladies  seldom  carry 
pencils  about  them  at  a  dinner  party. 

His  love  was,  however,  not  to  be  baffled  by  so  trifling  an  obsta 
cle  ;  and,  after  reading  the  note  calmly,  the  lady  turned  to  the  mes 
senger  and  said,  "  Tell  the  gentleman,  '  Yes  ' ' 

They  were  married  in  due  course. 


TOO    BASHFUL    TO    PROPOSE. 

We  have  heard  of  a  good  lady  who  remonstrated  with  her 
daughter  for  not  being  more  demonstrative  in  her  affection,  and 
encouraging  the  advances  of  a  young  man  who  seemed  desperately 
in  love  with  her,  but  who  lacked  the  confidence  to  propose.  The 
young  lady  ingeniously  and  candidly  confessed  that  she  had  made 
many  laudable  efforts  in  that  direction,  but  without  avail.  For  in 
stance,  one  evening,  when  they  were  out  walking,  he  had  asked  her 
what  was  her  favorite  drink,  and  she  said  "  Pop,"  but  even  that 
failed  to  bring  the  desired  proposal,  and  so  she  had  given  it  up  as 
a  failure. 


COURTING   ON    BOXWOOD    ROLLERS. 

Roller  skates  were  invented  to  enable  young  people  to  get  away 
from  the  restrictions  of  society.  This  was  said  by  an  old  married 
woman  with  three  pretty  daughters,  but  it  is  true  all  the  same. 


174  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

Roller  skating  has  brought  freedom  to  youth,  and  has  added  to 
the  wrinkles  of  maternity,  for  that  old  national  adage,  "  Maternal 
vigilance  is  the  price  of  liberty,"  has  been  supplemented  by  the 
motto  :  Admission  price,  50  cents.  A  calm  joy  has  been  spreading 
over  the  usually  care-worn  faces  of  counter-jumpers  and  entry  clerks 
for  weeks.  There  is  a  self-satisfied  air  of  triumph  resting  on  the 
features  of  the  blonde  book-folders,  and  a  new  hope  sparkles  in  the 
eye  of  the  brunette  floor-walker,  for  the  roller  skate  has  opened  the 
new  door  of  flirtation.  The  whole  ingenuity  of  man  has  been  cm- 
ployed  for  a  century  in  trying  to  devise  some  way  by  which  the 
counter-jumper  in  his  amorous  moments  could  defy  the  old  woman. 
It  was  not  until  the  roller-skate  was  invented  that  the  glad  world 
of  counter-jumpers  shouted  "  Eureka." 

These  extraordinary  facilities  afforded  to  love's  young  dream, 
have  produced  a  revolution  in  the  household  and  in  the  community. 
The  wife  who  can  skate  no  longer  shudders  under  the  tyranny  of 
the  husband  who  cannot.  The  husband  who  skates  is  at  last  re 
leased  from  the  thraldom  of  the  wife.  Matrimonial  squabbles  now 
terminate  with  an— "  All  right,  my  dear,  if  you  cannot  afford  it. 
Hand  me  down  my  skates."  "  Do  you  love  me  deep  enough  for  a 
new  gros  grain  ?"  "  No,  I  do  not.  My  love  never  went  further 
than  a  plain  silk."  "  All  right.  Then  I  go  to  the  rink  to-night." 

It  is  absolutely  impossible  to  interfere.  You  might  as  well  try 
to  put  a  shooting  star  into  traces.  Here,  alas  !  the  poetry  of  motion 
kills  the  justice  of  matrimony.  A  husband  who  cannot  skate  can 
not  vindicate  himself.  Every  one  of  these  skating  rinks  is  lined 
with  hollow-eyed  husbands,  furrowed  fathers,  and  melancholy 
mothers.  They  sit  'round  and  look  helplessly  on  at  the  mad  mer. 
riment.  Let  them  but  place  one  foot  within  that  hive,  and  on  their 
heads,  yea,  though  they  wore  a  crown,  will  fall  the  curse  of  the 


rink. —  Toronto  Evening  Mail. 


PROPOSAL.  175 

REFUSAL   TO    PROPOSAL. 

I  am  glad  that  you  arc  in  love,  'twill  cure  you  at  least  of  the 
spleen,  which  has  a  bad  effect  both  on  man  and  woman.  I  must 
tell  you  how  I  have  just  treated  a  French  gentleman  of  fortune  in 
France,  who  took  a  liking  to  my  daughter.  Without  any  ceremony 
(having  got  my  direction  from  my  wife's  banker),  he  wrote  me  word 
that  he  was  in  love  with  my  daughter,  and  desired  to  know  what 
fortune  I  would  give  her  at  present,  and  how  much  at  my  death — 
by  the  bye,  I  think  there  was  very  little  sentiment  on  his  side.  My 
answer  was,  "  Sir,  I  shall  give  her  ten  thousand  pounds  on  the  day 
of  her  marriage — my  calculation  is  as  follows — she  is  not  eighteen, 
you  are  sixty-two — there  goes  five  thousand  pounds — then,  Sir,  you 
at  least  think  her  not  ngly — she  has  many  accomplishments,  speaks 
Italian,  French,  plays  upon  the  guitar,  and  and  as  I  fear  you  play 
upon  no  instrument  whatever,  I  think  you  will  be  happy  to  take 
her  rp  MI  my  terms,  for  here  finishes  the  account  of  the  ten  thous 
and  pounds."  I  do  not  suppose  but  he  will  take  this  as  I  mean, 
that  is,  a  flat  refusal. — Sterne. 


WHY  MAY  NOT  WOMEN    PROPOSE? 


'I  LL  some  one  say  ?  We  do  not  profess  ability  to  decide 
on  so  important  a  matter.  We  leave  it  an  open  ques 
tion — why  may  not  the  fair  sex  make  a  fair  offer,  and 
the  gentler  half  of  mankind  perform  the  gentle  work 
of  genial  wooing?  Queens  and  princesses  do  it  when 
they  marry  a  degree  below  them  in  rank,  and  why  may  not  the 
great  commonalty  have  like  privileges  with  them  ?  No  doubt  our 
less  favored  sisters  have  recourse  to  many  indirect  or  roundabout 
methods  of  "declaring  their  intentions,"  an.l  oftentimes  institute 
certain  ways-and  means  committees  of  relatives  and  friends  to  com 
pass  their  sweet  designs  of  winning  men  ;  but  a  good  deal  of  length 
ened,  tedious,  anxious  and  circunVozutory  process  would  be  saved 
them,  if  a  too-partial  custom  would  but  a1  low  them  the  pleasure  of 
an  open  and  a  frank  avowal  of  the  tender  passion.  And  we  are 
sure  that  with  their  tact  and  vivacity,  and  poetical  dash,  they  would 
perform  the  work  with  far  more  grace  and  readiness  than  do  many 
of  their  more  ungainly  brethren. 

We  are  aware  that  there  is  a  Cheshire  proverb  to  this  effect : 
"  It  is  time  to  yoke  when  the  cart  comes  to  the  caples,"  (horses.) 
And  a  Scottish  saw  declares,  that  "when  petticoats  woo  breeks, 
come  speed."  Nevertheless  we  find  fair  Scotia  once  passed  an  Act 
of  Parliament  in  favor  of  it,  which  runs  thus  : 

"  It  is  ordainit  that,  during  the  reign  of  her  maist  blessit  Majes 
tic,  ilka  maiden  ladye  of  baith  high  and  low  estates  sail  hae  libertye 

176 


PROPOSAL.  1 77 

to  bespeake  ye  man  she  likes  beste;  albeit  gif  he  refaises  to  tak  her 
till  his  wife,  he  sail  be  mulct  in  ye  sumc  of  anc  hundredth  pundes 
or  less,  as  his  estate  may  be  ;  except  and  alwaies  gif  he  mak  it  ap- 
peire  that  he  is  betrothed  to  another  woman  that  he  sail  be  free. 
Passed  in  the  reign  of  Margaret,  commonly  called  maid  of  Norway, 
A.  D.  1028." 

And  the  Spanish  maiden,  in  Iglesias,  deplores  the  fact  that  she 
cannot  "tell  her  love,"  but  must  bear  the  sweet  but  burdensome 
secret  in  oppressive,  yearning  silence  when  she  sings  : 

(From  the  Spanish  of  Iglesias.) 

Alexis  calls  me  cruel  ; 

The  rifted  crags  that  hold 
The  gathered  ice  of  winter, 

He  says  are  not  more  cold. 

When  even  the  very  blossoms 

Around  the  fountain's  brim, 
And  forest  walks,  can  witness 

The  love  1  bear  to  him. 

I  would  that  I  could  utter 

My  feelings  without  shame  ; 
And  tell  him  how  I  love  him, 

Nor  wrong  my  virgin  fame. 

Alas!  to  seize  the  moment 

When  heart  inclines  to  heart, 
And  press  a  suit  with  passion, 

Is  not  a  woman's  part. 

If  man  comes  not  to  gather 

The  roses  where  they  stand, 
They  fade  among  their  foliage, 

They  cannot  seek  his  hand. — Bryant. 
*12 


178  PROPOSAL  AND   ESPOUSAL. 

"  NO." 

Few  have  learnt  to  speak  this  word 

When  it  should  be  spoken  ; 
Resolution  is  deferred, 

Vows  to  virtue  broken. 
More  of  courage  is  required, 

This  one  word  to  say, 
Than  to  stand  where  shots  are  fired 

In  the  battle  fray. 
Use  it  fitly,  and  ye'll  see 

Many  a  lot  below 
May  be  schooled,  and  nobly  ruled 

By  power  to  utter  "  No." 

*  *  *  * 

Hearts  that  arc  too  often  given, 

Like  street  merchandise- 
Hearts  that  like  bought  slaves  arc  driven 

In  fair  freedom's  guise  ; 
Ye  that  poison  soul  and  mind 

With  perjury's  foul  stains  ; 
Ye  who  let  the  cold  world  bind, 

In  joyless  marriage  chains  ; 
Be  ye  true  unto  yourselves  ; 

Let  rank  and  fortune  go  : 
if  Love  light  not  the  altar  spot, 

Let  Feeling  answer  "  No." 

— Eliza  Cook. 


&i<&&!sdts4#$>!$&&& 


THE    BETROTHAL. 


HAVE  betrothed  thce  unto  me  in  righteousness.  —  Bible, 
And  the  servants  brought  forth  jewels  of  silver,  and 
jewels  of  gold,  and  raiment,  and  gave  them  to  Rebekah; 
he  gave  also  to  her  brother  and  to  her  mother  precious 
things. 

And  they  did  eat  and  drink,  he  and  the  men  that  were 
with  him,  and  they  tarried  all  night.  —  Genesis. 


Among  the  Greeks  it  was  required  that  every  marriage  should 
be  preceded  by  a  betrothal.  This,  in  fact,  was  indispensable  to  the 
complete  validity  of  a  marriage  contract.  It  was  made  by  the  nat 
ural  or  legal  guardian  of  the  bride  elect,  and  attended  by  the  rela 
tives  of  both  parties  as  witnesses.  The  law  of  Athens  ordained 
that  all  children  born  from  a  marriage  legally  contracted  in  this 
respect  should  be  legitimate,  and  consequently,  if  sons,  entitled  to 
inherit  equally.  It  would  seem,  therefore,  that  the  issue  of  a  mar 
riage  without  espousals  would  lose  their  heritable  rights,  which 
depended  on  their  being  born  from  a  citizen  and  a  legally-betrothed 
wife.  The  wife's  dowry  was  also  settled  at  the  espousals. 

To  associate  with  a  man  in  secret,  without  the  consent  of  par 
ents,  or  the  solemn  rites  of  marriage,  was  disgraceful  to  a  noble 
maiden.  Marriage,  to  be  lawful,  must  be  contracted  under  the 
direction,  or,  at  least,  with  the  consent  of  parents,  as  we  find  from 

179 


iSo  PROPOSAL    AND    ESPOUSAL. 

the  expressions  of  Briscis  in  her  lament  over  Patroclus  ;  or  from  the 
refusal  of  Achilles  to  marry  the  daughter  of  Agamemnon  without 
the  consent  of  Pclcus.  The  primitive  custom  of  the  purchase  of 
the  bride  by  the  bridegroom,  who  prevailed  in  his  suit  by  the  weight 
of  his  gifts,  had  been  so  far  softened  in  the  Homeric  age  that  the 
wishes  of  the  daughter  \vcrc  consulted.  When  Penelope  puts  off 
her  suitors  under  ingenious  pretexts,  Antinonous  urges  Telemachus 
to  send  home  his  mother,  and  to  commend  her  to  unite  herself  to 
him  whom  her  father  approved  of  and  she  herself  preferred. — • 
Ant  lions  Greece. 

JEWISH    HKTKOTIIAL. 

Espousing,  or  betrothing,  was  nothing  else  but  a  solemn  prom 
ise  made  by  two  persons,  each  to  the  other,  at  such  a  distance  of 
time  as  they  agreed  upon.  The  manner  of  performing  this  es 
pousal  was  either  by  a  writing,  or  by  a  piece  of  silver  given  to  the 
bride.  ****** 

The  writing  that  was  prepared  on  these  occasions  ran  in  this 
form  :  "  On  such  a  day,  of  such  a  month,  in  such  a  year,  A,  the 
son  of  A,  has  said  to  B,  the  daughter  of  B,  be  thou  my  spouse  ac 
cording  to  the  law  of  Moses  and  the  Israelites,  and  I  will  give  thec 
for  the  portion  of  thy  virginity  the  sum  of  two  hundred  zuzims,  as 
it  is  ordained  by  law. 

And  the  said  B  has  consented  to  become  his  spouse  upon  these 
conditions,  which  the  said  A  has  promised  to  perform.  To  this  the 
said  A  obliges  himself,  and  for  this  he  engages  all  his  goods,  even 
as  far  as  the  cloak  which  he  wears  upon  his  shoulder.  Moreover, 
he  promises  to  perform  all  that  is  intended  in  contracts  of  marriage 
with  Israelitish  women.  Witness,  A,  B,  C." 

The  promise  by  a  piece  of  silver,  and  without  writing,  was  be 
fore  witnesses,  when  the  young  man  said  to  his  mistress  :  "  Receive 
this  piece  of  silver  as  a  pledge  that  thou  wilt  become  my  spouse." 


PROPOSAL.  I  Si 

After  such  espousal  was  made,  which  was  generally  when  the 
parties  were  young,  the  woman  continued  with  her  parents  several 
months,  if  not  some  years,  before  she  was  brought  home  and  her 
marriage  consummated  ;  for  so  we  find  Samson's  wife  remained 
with  her  parents  a  considerable  time  after  espousal  (Judges  xiv.  8.) 

COURTING      BY      PROXY. 

And  the  man  came  into  the  house:  and  he  ungiixlcvl  his  camels, 
and  gave  straw  and  provender  for  the  camels,  and  water  to  wash 
his  feet,  and  the  men's  feet  that  were  with  him. 

And  there  was  set  meat  before  him  to  eat :  but  he  said  I  will 
not  eat  until  I  have  told  mine  errand.  And  he  said,  Speak  on. 

And  he  said,  I  am  Abraham's  servant. 

And  the  Lord  hath  blessed  my  master  greatly  ;  and  he  is  be 
come  great :  and  he  hath  given  him  flocks,  and  herds,  and  silver, 
and  gold,  and  menservants,  and  maidservants,  and  camels,  and 


s=> 

asses. 


And  Sarah,  my  master's  wife,  bare  a  son  to  my  master  when 
she  was  old  :  and  unto  him  hath  lie  given  all  that  he  hath. 

And  my  master  made  me  swear,  saying,  Thou  shalt  not  take  a 
wife  to  my  son  of  the  daughters  of  the  Canaanites,  in  whose  land 

I  dwell. 

But  thou  shalt  go  unto  my  father's  house,  and  to  my  kindred, 
and  take  a  wife  unto  my  son. 

And  now,  if  ye  will  deal  kindly  and  truly  with  my  master,  tell 
me  ;  and  if  not,  tell  me  ;  that  I  may  turn  to  the  right  hand,  or  to 
the  left. 

gvs ,4,. gg .*• a^Q 

GALEEI)    (HEAP    OF    WITNESS.) 

A  young  man  pledged  his  dearest  faith  to  a  maiden,  beautiful 
and  true.  For  a  time  all  passed  pleasantly,  and  the  maiden  lived 
in  happiness,  but  then  the  man  was  called  from  her  side.  He  left 


1 82  PROPOSAL   AND    ESPOUSAL. 

her.  Long  she  waited,  but  he  did  not  return.  Friends  pitied  her, 
and  rivals  mocked  her ;  tauntingly  they  pointed  at  her,  and  said, 
"  He  has  left  thee  ;  he  will  never  come  back."  The  maiden  sought 
her  chamber,  and  read  in  secret  the  letters  which  her  lover  had 
written  to  her,  the  letters  in  which  he  promised  to  be  ever  faithful, 
ever  true.  Weeping  she  read  them,  but  they  brought  comfort  to  her 
heart ;  she  dried  her  eyes  and  doubted  not. 

A  joyous  day  dawned  for  her  ;  the  man  she  loved  returned,  and 
when  he  learned  that  others  had  doubted,  and  asked  her  how  she 
had  preserved  her  faith,  she  showed  his  letters  to  him,  declaring  her 
eternal  trust. 

Israel,  in  misery  and  captivity,  was  mocked  by  the  nations  ;  her 
hopes  of  redemption  were  made  a  laughing-stock  ;  her  sages  scoffed 
at  ;  her  holy  men  derided.  Into  her  synagogues,  into  her  schools 
went  Israel  ;  she  read  the  letters  which  her  God  had  written,  and 
believed  in  the  holy  promises  which  they  contained. 

God  will  in  time  redeem  her,  and  when  He  says: 

"  How  could  you  alone  be  faithful  of  all  the  mocking  nations  ?" 

She  will  point  to  the  law  and  answer  : 

"  Had  not  Thy  law  been  my  delight,  I  should  long  since  have 
perished  in  my  affliction"  (Psalm  119). 


THE    WEASEL    AND    THE   WELL;   OR,     "BE    SURE    YOUR    SIN    WILL 

FIND   YOU    OUT. 

A  young  man,  upon  his  journeys  through  the  country,  fell  in 
with  a  young  woman,  and  they  became  mutually  attached.  When 
the  young  man  was  obliged  to  leave  the  neighborhood  of  the  dam 
sel's  residence,  they  met  to  say  good-bye.  During  the  parting  the)' 
pledged  a  mutual  faith,  and  each  promised  to  wait  until,  in  the 
course  of  time,  they  might  be  able  to  marry.  "Who  will  be  the 
witness  ot  our  betrothal  ?"  said  the  young  man.  Just  then  they 


PROPOSAL.  183 

saw  a  weasel  run  past  them  and  disappear  in  the  wood.  "  Sec,"  he 
continued,  "  this  weasel  and  this  well  of  water  by  which  we  are 
standing  shall  be  the  witnesses  of  our  betrothal  ;"  and  so  they  part 
ed.  Years  passed,  the  maiden  remained  true,  but  the  youth  mar 
ried.  A  son  was  born  to  him,  and  grew  up  the  delight  of  his 
parents.  One  day  while  the  child  was  playing,  he  became  tired, 
and  lying  upon  the  ground  fell  asleep.  A  weasel  bit  him  in  the 
neck,  and  he  bled  to  death.  The  parents  were  consumed  with  grief 
by  this  calamity,  and  it  was  not  until  another  son  was  given  them 
that  they  forgot  their  sorrow.  But  when  this  second  child  was  able 
l.o  walk  alone,  it  wandered  about  the  house,  and  bending  over  the 
well,  looking  at  its  shadow  in  the  water,  lost  its  balance  and  was 
drowned.  Then  the  father  recollected  his  perjured  vow,  and  his 
witnesses,  the  weasel  and  the  well.  He  told  his  wife  of  the  circum 
stance,  and  she  agreed  to  a  divorce.  He  then  sought  the  maiden 
to  whom  he  had  promised  marriage,  and  found  her  still  awaiting 
his  return.  He  told  her  how,  through  God's  agency,  he  had  been 
punished  for  his  wrong-doing,  after  which  they  were  married  and 
lived  in  peace. —  Talmud, 

HUNGER    STRONGER    THAN    LOVE;    OR    "WHEN    WANT    COMES    IN 
AT    THE    DOOR    LOVE    ELIES    OUT    AT    THE    WINDOW." 

"  Russian  merchants,  recently  returned  from  China,  give  terrible 
details  of  the  famine  in  the  Celestial  Empire.  Not  only  were  dead 
bodies  freely  eaten  by  the  starving  people,  but  famished  men  at 
tacked  the  living,  and. preyed  upon  them  with  all  the  ferocity  of 
the  fiercest  carnivora.  A  young  man  murdered  and  devoured  the 
girl  to  whom  he  was  betrothed,  and  men  had  been  executed  for 
killing  and  eating  their  own  children." 


1 84  PROPOSAL    AND    ESPOUSAL. 

PROPIIKTIC      PROOF. 

And  thou  shalt  cat  the  fruit  of  thine  own  body,  the  flesh  of  thy 
sons  and  of  thy  daughters  which  the  Lord  thy  God  hath  given 
in  the  scigc,  and  in  the  straitncss  wherewith  thine  enemies  shall 
distress  thce. 

So  that  the  man  that  is  tender  among  you,  and  very  delicate, 
his  eye  shall  be  evil  toward  his  brother,  and  toward  the  wife  of  his 
bosom,  and  toward  the  remnant  of  his  children  which  he  shall  leave. 

So  that  he  will  not  give  to  any  of  them  of  the  flesh  of  his  child 
ren  whom  he  shall  eat  ;  because  he  hath  nothing  left  him  in  the 
siege,  and  in  the  straitncss  wherewith  thine  enemies  shall  distress 
thce  in  all  tin*  gates. — Kiblc. 


HISTORIC     PROOF. 

And  the  king  said  unto  her,  What  ailcth  thce?  And  she  an 
swered,  This  woman  said  unto  me,  Give  thy  son,  that  we  may  eat 
him  to  day,  and  we  will  eat  my  son  to  morrow. 

So  we  boiled  my  son,  and  did  eat  him  :  and  I  said  unto  her  on 
the  next  day,  Give  thy  son,  that  we  may  cat  him  :  and  she  hath 

hid  her  son. 

• — •&(<>->• — 

THE    CONSKNT    <  >F    C.rAKDIANS. 

Then  Laban  and  Bcthuel  answered  and  said,  The  thing  pro- 
ccedcth  from  the  Lord  ;  we  cannot  speak  unto  thee  bad  or  good. 

Behold,  Rebekah  is  before  thce,  take  her,  and  go,  and  let  her 
be  thy  master's  son's  wife,  as  the  Lord  hath  spoken. 

And  it  came  to  pass,  that,  when  Abraham's  servant  heard  their 
words,  he  worshipped  the  Lord,  bowing  himself  to  the  earth. 

When  virgins  had  no  fathers,  their  brothers  disposed  of  them, 
(even  as  in  Biblical  history  we  find  Bcthuel  consenting  to  Rcbckah's 


PROPOSAL.  185 

marriage  with  Isaac).  When  they  had  neither  parents  nor  breth 
ren,  or  if  their  brethren  were  not  arrived  to  years  of  discretion,  they 
were  disposed  of  by  their  grandfathers,  those  especially  on  the 
father's  side  ;  when  these  failed,  they  were  committed  to  the  care 
of  guardians. 

Sometimes  husbands  betrothed  their  wives  to  other  persons  upon 
their  deathbeds,  as  appears  from  the  story  of  Demosthenes'  father, 
who  gave  his  wife,  Cleobule,  to  one  Aphobus,  with  a  considerable 
portion.  When  he  was  dead,  Alphobus  took  the  portion,  but  re 
fused  to  marry  the  woman  ;  whereupon  Demosthenes  made  his 
complaint  to  the  magistrates,  and  accused  him  in  an  elegant 
oration. 

And  that  this  custom  was  not  unusual,  appears  from  the  same 
orator's  defence  of  Phermio,  who  being  a  slave  and  faithful  in  his 
business,  his  master  gave  him  both  his  liberty  and  his  wife. 


GOOD   DAUGHTERS    MAKE   THE    BEST   WIVES. 

When  a  young  woman  behaves  to  her  parents  in  a  manner  par 
ticularly  tender  and  respectful,  I  mean  from  principle  as  well  as 
nature,  there  is  nothing  good  and  gentle  that  may  not  be  expected 
from  her  in  whatever  condition  she  is  placed.  Of  this  I  am  so 
thoroughly  persuaded,  that,  were  I  to  advise  any  friend  of  mine  as 
to  his  choice  of  a  wife,  I  know  not  whether  my  first  counsel  would 
not  be,  "Look  out  for  one  distinguished  by  her  attention  and  sweet 
ness  to  her  parents."  The  fund  of  worth  and  affection,  indicated 
by  such  a  behaviour,  joined  to  the  habit  of  duty  and  consideration 
thereby  contracted,  being  transferred  to  the  married  state,  will  not 
fail  to  render  her  a  mild  and  obliging  companion.  —  Fordyce. 

"Marry  your  son  when  you  will,  and  your  daughter  when  you 

can." 


PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 


"  My  son  is  my  son  till  he's  got  him  a  wife  ; 
My  daughter's  my  daughter  all  the  days  of  her  life." 

This  is  a  woman's  calculation.     She   knows  that   a  son-in-law 
will  submit  to  her  sway  more  tamely  than  a  daughter-in-law. 


THF.    DEPARTURE. 

My  noble  father, 

I  do  perceive  here  a  divided  duty  : 
To  you,  I  am  bound  for  life  and  education  ; 
My  life  and  education  both  do  learn  me 
How  to  respect  you  ;  you  arc  the  lord  of  duty, 
I  am  hitherto  your  daughter:  but  here's  my  husband 
And  so  much  duty  as  my  mother  show'd 
To  you,  preferring  you  before  her  father, 
So  much  I  challenge  that  I  may  profess 
Due  to  the  Moor  my  lord. — Sliakspeare. 


"AND    SI1K    SAID,  I    WILL    CO." 

And   her  brother   and   her   mother   said,  Let  the  damsel   abide 
with  us  a  few  days,  at  the  least  ten  ;  after  that  she  shall  <rO 

o      * 

And  he  said  unto  them,  Hinder  me   not,  seeing  the  Lord  hath 
prospered  my  way  ;  send  me  away  that  I  may  go  to  my  master. 

And    they  said,  We   will    call   the  damsel,  and   inquire  at  her 
mouth. 

And  they  called  Rebckah,  and  said  unto  her,  Wilt  thou  go  with 
this  man?     And  she  said,  I  will  go. 

And  they  sent  away  Rcbekah   their  sister,  and   her   nurse,  and 
Abraham's  servant,  and  his  men. — Bible. 


PROPOSAL. 

Sweet  and  solemn  falls  the  accents 

Of  the  Holy  Spirit's  voice, 
As  He  gently  pleadeth  with  us, 

Urging  us  to  make  our  choice. 
"Unto  Christ,  to  Him  who  loves  thee 

With  a  love  thou  ne'er  canst  know, 
Unto  Him  who  died  to  save  thee, 

Wilt  thou  go?" 

"  Follow  Me,  and  I  will  guide  thee 

Safe  across  earth's  desert  plain, 
And  beguile  its  dreary  wasteness 

With  soft  whisperings  of  his  name, 
Unto  Him  who  waits  to  meet  thee 

In  the  heaven's  eternal  glow, 
There  to  reign  with  Him  forever, 

Wilt  thou  go?" 
"  We  will  go,"  we  answer  gladly, 

Blessed  Spirit,  at  Thy  call, 
Though  the  road  be  full  of  danger, 

Thou  wilt  bring  us  safe  through  all. 
We  will  follow  in  the  pathway 

That  alone  our  Master  trod, 
Knowing  that  its  narrow  windings 

Lead  us  surely  up  to  God. 

"  We  will  go,"  the  world  forsaking, 

With  its  endless  toil  and  strife, 
Into  all  the  peace  and  gladnesss 

Of  the  resurrection  life  ; 
Each  new  step  our  trust  will  deepen, 

In  His  mighty  love  and  grace, 
Till  at  last,  our  journey  over, 

We  behold  him  face  to  face. —  The  Christian. 


1 88  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

WILT    THOU    GO   WITH    THIS   MAN  ? 
Wilt  thou  go  with  this  man  to  the  lowlands  afar, 
Like  the  needle  still  pointing  invisible  star? 
Leave  "the  land  of  sunrising" — dare  flood  and  disaster, 
For  the  region  where  dwelleth  thy  new  lord  and  master? 
Forsake  thy  dear  kindred,  companions  and  home, 
And  direct  thy  way  onward — still  southward  to  roam  ? 
Wilt  cross  the  deep  desert,  sweet  Euphrates'  water, 
And  depart  with  this  stranger,  oh  excellent  daughter? 
Commit  thy  way  to  him  on  bare  testimony, 
And  seek  the  land  flowing  with  milk  and  with  honey  : 
Adventure  thy  future  for  weal  or  for  woe— 
Wilt  thou  go  with  this  man  ?     And  she  said,  I  will  go. 

O  Jesus,  our  Isaac,  to  Canaan  thou'st  gone, 

But  thy  love  is  still  wooing  and  drawing  us  on  : 

Thy  servants  bring  presents  and  call  us  away, 

To  behold  thee  again  in  thy  brighter  array  : 

The  jewels  so  fair  are  direct  from  thy  place, 

And  the  pledges  arc  bright  with  the  smile  of  thy  face. 

See  !  the  bracelet  of  promise  is  what  my  Lord  saith, 

And  the  car-ring  of  gold  is  "  the  hearing  of  faith." 

The  ring  on  my  finger  is  the  covenant  of  love, 

And  my  sandals  are  light  as  the  wings  of  a  dove  ; 

The  palfry  that  bears  me,  Revelation's  white  steed, 

Both  charger  and  courser — for  war  and  for  speed  : 

My  loved  one  awaits  me  ;  O  bid  me  not  stay, 

He  calls  me  his  -<  Fair  one,"  and  bids  me  away 

Accepting  these  tokens,  I  answer  Him  so— 

Wilt  thou  go  with  this  man?     And  she  said,  I  will  go. 


PROPOSAL  189 

BETROTHAL  BY  THE  SEA. 

"  Take  me  or  leave  me." 

They  are  on  the  seashore — Love's  favorite  resort — where  the 
waves  are  ever  "saying,  saying."  Shells  and  pebbles  and  miles  of 
glittering  nothings  stretch  shining  on  to  beguile  there  pleasant,  love- 
allured  footsteps.  They  are  building  castles  in  the  air  as  assidu 
ously  and  half  as. profitably  as  the  children  around  them  arc  con 
structing  mimic  rampart  in  the  yielding,  gravelled  sand  ;  only  of 
course  to  be  washed  away,  "  stormed  and  taken  "  by  the  ruthless 
forces  of  the  next  incoming  tide.  The  deep  is  before  them,  "great 
and  wide,"  emblem  alike  of  the  Infinite  and  of  their  own  boundless 
affection.  Little  wavelets,  like  children  in  holiday  time,  garlanded 
with  "sunbows,"  run  racing  along  the  all-encompassing  main,  and 
leap  in  bright  laughter  on  the  shelving  stand.  Seamews  ride  the 
musical  crests  of  the  breaking  waters,  and  rock  themselves  to  a 
charming  repose  on  the  mother  deep's  ample  bosom. 

Vessels  outward  bound  are  vanishing  in  dimness  and  silence 
together,  and  are  softly  dipping  where  the  blue  sea  and  bluer  sky 
meet  and  mingle  their  mutual  azure,  glories,  and  are  gliding  on,  oh, 
so  calmly  and  beautifully,  and  so  sweetly  suggestive,  withal,  of 
some  happier  spirit  on  her  way  to  a  brighter  abode,  into  the  fair, 
half-magical  and  dim,  all-beckoning  unknown. 

Sea  monsters  lift  their  dark  heads  above  the  encompassing 
floods  and  steal  a  glimpse  of  upper  air  and  sunshine,  and  then  dis 
appear  as  if  from  a  world  too  bright  for  their  gross  taste,  and  descend 
again  with  a  splash  like  that  of  the  apocalyptic  millstone,  and  seek 
congenial  acquatic  gloom.  But  what,  pray,  to  this  enamoured  pair 
are  all  the  works  of  God  and  man,  or  the  wonders  of  divine  and 
human  skill,  compared  with  their  interest  in  each  other?  What  is 
the  "circle  of  the  floods,  "  to  the  girdle  of  that  maiden's  zone  ? 

"Give  me  but  what  this  ribbon  bound, 
Take  all  the  rest  the  sun  goes  round/' 


I9O  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

What,  \ve  repeat,  O  reader,  are  clouds  and  winds,  and  sails  and 
wings,  and  glittering  sands,  and  spacious  seas,  and  boundless  skies, 
and  bannered  processions,  and  gathering  concourses,  and  festive 
melodies,  and  blazoned  heraldries,  and  peerless  pomp,  and  all  the 
sublimities  and  pageantries  that  cluster  about  the  centres  of  opu 
lence  and  fashion,  when  once  compared  with  the  gratification  they 
find  in  each  other's  company? 

And  now  let  us  go  near  (turn  eaves-droppers  fora  moment)  and 
listen  to  the  honeyed  conversation  of  this  mutually-interested  couple. 

"  Mary,"  he  says,  as  he  presses  his  suit  with  the  ardor  of  most 
vehement  affection,  "you  can  surely  say  something."  "  Yes,"  re 
plies  the  deliberate  and  sweetly-calculating  fair  one,  "  I  suppose  I 
can  say  something."  And  while  she  speaks  she  is  busy  with  the 
important  work  of  tracing  tiny  channels  in  the  sand  with  the  end 
ot  her  parasol  to  allow  a  little  salt  water  to  run  out  of  one  hole  into 
another.  "Well,  what  is  it  to  be?"  he  pleads,  with  the  energy  of 
desperation,  as  he  resolutely  brings  matters  to  an  issue,  "  take  me 
or  leave  me?"  "Well,"  she  answers,  as  she  still  continues  her  en 
gineering  work  on  a  larger  scale,  "  I  don't  exactly  want  to  leave 
you."  Happy  man  ! 


BETROTHAL    BY    LOT 

PROVERBS  xviii.  —  "  '.'he  .ot  caused  contentions  to  cease,  and  parteth 
between  the  mighty.  -> 

In  nearly  all  cases  where  reason  cannot  decide,  or  where  the 
right  of  several  claimants  to  one  article  has  to  be  settled,  recourse 
is  had  to  the  lot,  which  "  causcth  contentions  to  cease."  Though 
an  Englishman  might  not  relish  such  a  mode  of  having  a  wife  as 
signed  to  him,  yet  many  a  one  in  the  East  has  no  other  guide  than 
this  in  that  important  acquisition. 

Perhaps  a  young  man  is  either  so  accomplished,  so  respectable* 
or  so  rich,  that  many  fathers  aspire  to  the  honor  of  calling  him 


PROPOSAL 


191 


"son-in-law."  Their  daughters  are  said  to  be  beautiful,  wealthy, 
and  of  a  good  family  :  what  is  he  to  do  ?  The  name  of  each  young 
lady  is  written  on  a  separate  piece  of  olah,  and  then  all  are  mixed 
together.  The  youth  and  his  friends  then  go  to  the  front  of  the 
temple,  and  being  seated,  a  person  who  is  passing  by  at  the  time 
is  called,  and  requested  to  take  one  of  the  pieces  of  olah,  on  which 
a  lady's  name  is  inscribed,  and  place  it  near  the  anxious  candidate. 
This  being  done,  it  is  opened,  and  she  whose  name  is  written  there 
becomes  his  wife. 

Are  two  men  inclined  to  marry  two  sisters  ?*  a  dispute  often 
arises  as  to  whom  the  youngest  shall  be  given.  To  cause  the  "con 
tentions  to  cease  "  they  again  have  recourse  to  the  lot.  The  names 
of  the  sisters  and  of  the  disputants  are  written  on  separate  pieces 
of  olah,  and  taken  to  a  sacred  place,  those  of  the  men  being  put  on 
one  side  and  the  females  on  the  other.  A  person  then,  who  is  un 
acquainted  with  the  matter,  takes  a  piece  of  olah  from  each  side, 
and  the  couple  whose  names  are  thus  joined  together  become  man 
and  wife.  But  sometimes  a  wealthy  father  cannot  decide  betwixt 
two  young  men  who  are  candidates  for  the  hand  of  his  daughter. 
What  can  he  do?  He  must  settle  his  doubts  by  lot.  Not  lon«- 

J  o 

ago  the  son  of  a  medical  man  and  another  youth  applied  for  the 
daughter  of  Sedambarah-Suppiyan,  the  rich  merchant.  The  old 
gentleman  caused  two  "  holy  writings  "  to  be  drawn  up  ;  the  names 
of  the  lovers  were  inscribed  thereon  :  the  son  of  Kandan,  the  doctor, 
was  drawn  forth,  and  the  young  lady  became  his  wife.  Three  Brah 
mins,  also,  who  were  brothers,  each  ardently  desired  the  hand  of 
one  female,  and,  after  many  disputes,  it  was  settled  by  lot,  which 
causeth  contentions  to  cease  ;  and  the  youngest  of  the  three  gained 
the  orize. 


-::>::  ::-:X>::>:V>:XVXXXX>:K:  ;*:>: 


COMING  OF  AGE,  OR  EARLY  BETROTHAL. 


Love  ahvavs  ID  season/' 


thou  idly  ask  to  hear 

At  what  gentle  seasons 
Nymphs  relent,  when  lovers  near 

Press  the  tendercst  reasons  ? 
Ah,  they  give  their  faith  too  oft 

To  the  careless  wooer  ; 
Maidens'  hearts  are  always  soft  , 

Would  that  men's  were  truer  ! 

Woo  the  fair  one,  when  around 

Early  birds  are  singing  , 
When,  o'er  all  the  fragrant  ground, 

Early  herbs  are  springing  • 
When  the  brookside,  bank  and  grove, 

All  with  blossoms  laden, 
Shine  with  beauty,  breathe  of  love  — 

Woo  the  timid  maiden. 

Woo  her  when,  with  rosy  blush, 

Summer  eve  is  sinking  ; 
When,  on  rills  that  softly  gush, 

Stars  are  softly  winking  ; 
192 


Her  bright  eyes  are  beaming, 
Half  waking  —half  dreaming  ; 
The  future  diviniug, 
To  love  all-inaiiaing. 


PROPOSAL.  193 

When,  through  boughs  that  knit  the  bower, 

Moonlight  gleams  are  stealing  ; 
Woo  her,  till  the  gentle  hour 

Wake  a  gentler  feeling. 

Woo  her,  when  autumnal  dyes 

Tinge  the  woody  mountain  ; 
When  the  dropping  foliage  lies, 

In  the  weedy  fountain  ; 
Let  the  scene,  that  tells  how  fast 

Youth  is  passing  over, 
Warn  her,  ere  her  bloom  is  past, 

To  secure  her  lover. 

Woo  her,  when  the  north  winds  call 

At  the  lattice  nightly, 
When,  within  the  cheerful  hall, 

Blaze  the  fagots  brightly  ; 
While  the  wintry  tempest  round 

Sweeps  the  landscape  hoary, 
Sweeter  in  her  ear  shall  sound 

Love's  delightful  story.  —  Bryant. 


EARLY   BETROTHAL   IN    ENGLAND. 

"  It  may  be  interesting  to  compare  the  different  ages  at  which 
Her  Majesty's  children  have  been  married.  The  Princess  Beatrice 
is  now  married  in  her  twenty-eighth  year,  the  Princess  Royal  mar 
ried  in  her  eighteenth  year  ;  the  Prince  of  Wales  was  married  when 
in  his  twenty-second  year  ;  the  Princess  Alice  in  her  twentieth 
year  ;  the  Duke  of  Edinburgh  in  his  thirtieth  year  ;  the  Princess 
Helena  in  her  twenty-first  year  ;  the  Princess  Louise  in  her  twenty- 

fourth  year  ;  the  Duke  of  Connaught  in  his  twenty-ninth  year  ;  the 
*13 


194  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

Duke  of  Albany  in  his  thirtieth  year.  The  united  ages  at  marriage 
of  the  five  Royal  Princesses  make  ill  ;  the  united  ages  at  marriage 
of  the  four  Princes  make  ill  years.  By  striking  an  average  one 
finds  that  the  Princesses  arc  married  at  22  1-5  years,  and  Princes 
at  2'." 


EARLY    15KTROTIIAL    IN    FRANCE. 

A  word  or  two  about  Saint-Simon  and  his  youth.  At  nineteen 
he  was  destined  by  his  mother  to  be  married.  Now,  every  one 
knows  how  marriages  are  managed  in  France,  not  only  in  the  time 
of  Saint-Simon,  but  even  to  the  present  day.  A  mother,  or  an 
aunt,  or  a  grandmother,  or  an  experienced  friend,  looks  out  ;  be  it 
for  son,  be  it  for  daughter,  it  is  the  business  of  her  life.  She  looks 
and  she  finds  ;  family,  suitable  ;  fortune,  convenient  ;  person,  pas 
uial  \  principles,  Catholic,  with  a  due  abhorrence  of  heretics,  es 
pecially  English  ones.  After  a  time,  the  lady  is  to  be  looked  at  by 
the  unhappy  pretendu  ;  a  church,  a  mass,  or  vespers,  being  very 
often  the  opportunity  agreed.  The  victim  thinks  she  will  do.  The 
proposal  is  discussed  by  the  two  mammas  ;  relatives  are  called  in  ; 
all  goes  well  ;  the  contract  is  signed  ;  then  a  measured  acquaintance 
is  allowed  ;  but  no  tete-a-tetes  ;  no  idea  of  love  .  "  What  !  so  indeli 
cate  a  sentiment  before  marriage  !  Let  me  not  hear  of  it,"  cries 
mamma,  in  a  sanctimonious  panic.  "Love!  Quelle  betise  !"  adds 
mon  perc. 

But  Saint-Simon,  it  seems,  had  the  folly  to  wish  to  make  a 
marriage  of  inclination.  Rich,  pair  de  France,  his  father  —  an  old 
roue,  who  had  been  page  to  Louis  XIII.  —  dead,  he  felt  extremely 
alone  in  the  world.  He  cast  about  to  see  whom  he  could  select 
The  Due  dc  Bcauvilliers  had  eight  daughters  ;  a  misfortune  it  may 
be  thought  in  France,  or  anywhere  else.  Not  at  all  ;  three  of  the 
young  ladies  were  kept  at  home  to  be  married  ;  the  other  five  were 
at  once  disposed  of,  as  they  passed  the  unconscious  age  of  infancy, 


PROPOSAL.  195 

in  convents.  Saint-Simon  was,  however,  disappointed.  He  offered, 
indeed  ;  first  for  the  eldest,  who  was  not  then  fifteen  years  old  ; 
and  finding  that  she  had  a  vocation  for  conventual  life,  went  on  to 
the  third,  and  was  going  through  the  whole  family,  when  he  was 
convinced  that  his  suit  was  impossible.  The  eldest  daughter  hap 
pened  to  be  a  disciple  of  Fenelon's  and  was  on  the  very  eve  of  being 
vowed  to  heaven. 

Saint-Simon  went  off  to  La  Trappe,  to  console  himself  for  his 
disappointment.  There  had  been  an  old  intimacy  between  Mon 
sieur  La  Trappe  and  the  father  of  Saint-Simon  ;  and  this  friendship 
had  induced  him  to  buy  an  estate  close  to  the  ancient  abbey  where 
La  Trappe  still  existed.  The  friendship  became  hereditary  ;  and 
Saint-Simon,  though  still  a  youth,  revered  and  loved  the  penitent 
recluse  of  Ferte  au  Vidauie^  of  which  Lamartine  has  written  so 
grand  and  so  poetical  a  description. 

Let  us  hasten  over  his  marriage  with  Mademoiselle  de  Lorges, 
who  proved  a  good  wife.  It  was  this  time  a  grandmother,  the 
Marechale  de  Lorges,  who  managed  the  treaty,  and  Saint-Simon 
became  the  happy  husband  cf  an  innocent  blende,  with  a  majestic 
air,  though  only  fifteen  years  of  age.  Let  us  hasten  on,  passing 
over  his  presents  ;  his  six  hundred  louis,  given  in  a  corbeille  full  of 
what  he  styles  "gallantries;"  his  mother's  donation  of  jewellery  ; 
the  midnight  mass,  by  which  be  was  linked  to  the  child  who  scarce 
ly  knew  him  ;  let  us  lay  all  that  aside;  and  turn  to  his  court  life.— 
Grace  and  PJiilip  Wkarton. 


EARLY   BETROTHAL   IN    CANADA. 


"  The  chief  social  event  in  the  lives  of  Canadian  peasants  is  a 
wedding — almost  the  only  set  occasion  for  festivities.  The  priest 
then  permits  dancing  among  the  relatives  and  allows  unusual  ex 
penses  to  be  incurred.  Courtship  is  ve  ry  short  and  circumspect. 


196  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

It  generally  lasts  but  a  few  months.  Engagements  are  made  very 
much  after  the  pecuniary  interests  followed  in  France,  and  the  mar 
riages  generally  occur  at  from  1  8  to  22  years  of  age." 


EARLY    BETROTHAL    IN    AMERICA. 

The  mode  then  in  vogue  of  announcing  some  events  appears 
strange  at  this  time.  The  following  form  of  a  marriage  notice, 
credited  to  a  Kentucky  paper,  will  give  an  idea  :— 

"In  Lexington,  Kentucky,  Harrison   Canins,  aged   15,  to  Miss 
Eliza  Plough,  aged  nearly  12.     A  long  life  to  them  !       Mrs.   Canir.s 
twelve  years   hence  will   be  a  spruce-  girl.       The  parties   may  be 
grandfathers  and  grandmothers  ere  they  are  30."  —  From  the  first 
volume  of  Christian  Guardian,  1829 


EARLY  BETROTHAL  IN    CHINA,  OR  "  WOLVES   AND    BUTTERFLIES." 

A  Chinese  orator  told  us,  some  time  ago,  that  the  people  in  his 
country  call  their  boys  'wolves,"  and  their  girls  "  butterflies,"  —  not 
altogether  a  meaningless  nomenclature. 

The  fathers  of  families  would  sometimes  meet  incidentally  in 
places  of  public  resort,  and  strike  up  a  marriage  alliance  between  so 
many  of  their  "  wolves  "  on  one  side,  and  their  "  butterflies  "  on  the 
other,  the  dear  little  creatures  of  both  sexes  not  being  at  all  'privy 
to  the  arrangement,  much  less  parties  to  the  contract.  These  juv 
eniles  were  oftentimes  thus  betrothed  by  proxy  as  soon  as  they 
were  nicely  out  of  the  cradle,  the  marriage  to  take  place  in  the 
course  of  so  many  years  —  say  when  they  would  be  respectively 
from  nine  to  twelve  years  of  age. 


PROPOSAL.  197 

A   CHINESE   GIRL   GRADUATE'S    TESTIMONY. 

In  the  class  of  graduates  for  1885,  from  the  Women's  Medical 
College  in  New  York,  was  a  remarkable  character,  in  the  petite 
person  of  Kin  Yai  Me,  a  Chinese  student,  who  graduated  at  the 
head  of  the  class.  Very  little  has  been  known  of  her,  because  her 
guardians  and  adopted  parents  have  been  most  zealous  to  prevent 
her  from  being  interviewed  during  her  college  life.  She  speaks 
English  better  than  some  of  her  American  friends  ;  she  wears  No. 

o 

I  shoes,  has  the  regulation  almond-shaped  eyes,  bangs  her  hair, 
which  is  long  and  straight,  and  possesses  all  the  politeness  of  her 
race  as  well  as  its  color.  Like  the  people  she  is  one  of,  she  has  a 
remarkable  memory,  and  this  gift  was  one  of  the  telling  qualities 
that  placed  her  above  the  average  student. 

When  she  was  three  years  old  she  was  left  an  orphan,  and  was 
adopted  by  the  then  United  States  consul  in  China,  Dr.  McCarter. 
Her  father  was  a  converted  Chinaman,  and  became  a  Presbyterian 
mission  minister  ;  he  was  also  educated  by  Dr.  McCarter,  and  de 
voted  himself  to  the  mission  work  among  his  own  people  in  China. 
Both  father  and  mother  of  Kin  Yai  Me  died  of  cholera  when  she 
was  three  years  of  age,  and  the  father  left,  her  to  the  care  and  edu 
cation  of  his  friend,  who  has  well  performed  his  trust.  Dr.  McCarter 
prepared  her  for  the  Medical  College,  and,  being  both  talented  and 
ambitious,  she  went  into  the  study  of  medicine  well  coached  and 
full  of  promise.  Some  idea  of  how  well  she  had  been  fostered  by 
her  adopted  parents  may  be  traced  in  the  fact  that  Mrs.  McCarter 
always  escorted  her  charge  home  from  the  College  on  Second 
Avenue  during  her  period  of  study.  When  she  graduated  she  had 
won  the  highest  position  in  the  class,  and  during  an  interview  with 
her,  she  told  one  of  the  classmates  she  should  return  to  China  and 
practise  among  the  women  of  her  race,  but  to  equip  herself  still 
more  for  that  work,  she  should  study  awhile  longer  before  return 
ing.  Upon  the  subject  of  marriage,  Yai  Me  said : 


PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

"  To  marry  outside  of  China  would  be  an  act  never  forgiven 
there  ;  besides  that  I  shall  never  marry  there,  either,  for  I  shall  be 
too  old." 

"  Too  old  ?"  was  the  surprised  reply. 

"Yes.  I  am  an  old  maid.  I  shall  be  over  21  before  I  return, 
and  that  is  too  old  for  Chinese  women  to  marry.  At  25  years  of 
age  few  Chinese  women  have  any  chances  to  marry.  All  marry 
between  12  and  18  years  of  age." 

"  You  might  be  an  exception,"  was  vouchsafed. 

"  No,"  she  replied,  "  there  are  other  reasons.  I  would  not  marry 
any  but  the  elder  son.  The  wives  of  junior  sons  are  all  ruled  by 
the  wife  of  the  eldest.  They  and  their  children  are  under  her  sup 
ervision,  and  you  see  I  could  only  marry  the  eldest  son,  and  I  shall 
be  too  old  to  do  so." 

"  How  old  were  you  when  you  entered  the  medical  college." 

"  Eighteen,"  she  replied,  "and,  although  I  have  graduated,  I 
have  still  much  to  accomplish  before  I  take  up  my  life  work  in 
China." 

Kin  Yai  Me  loves  her  profession  —  is,  indeed,  an  enthusiast  in  it. 
I  ler  marvellous  memory  was  the  comment  of  her  class.  The  deter 
mination  to  spare  her  from  undue  publicity  and  note  was  rigidly 
enforced,  but  her  scholarship  and  intended  career  induced  an  inter 
est  that  cannot  longer  be  concealed. 

She  is  a  Presbyterian  in  religion,  while  with  her  adopted  par 
ents,  at  least,  and  in  the  observance  of  the  marriage  customs  of  her 
own  country,  she  still  holds  her  allegiance  in  no  small  degree  to  the 
Celestial  Kingdom.  She  has  a  brother  who  occupies  some  officH 
position  in  China,  and  she  resides  for  the  present  in  Washington.  — 
T/ie  Toronto  Globe. 


EARLY    BETROTHAL    IN   JAPAN. 

"  Early  betrothals  have  never  been   as  general   in  Japan  as  in 
other  eastern  countries,  and  they  are  now  decreasing  yearly.    Mar- 


PROPOSAL.  199 

riagcs  are  arranged  by  their  respective  parents,  assisted  by  a  man 
and  his  wife  (mutual  friends  of  the  family)  as  an  intermediary. 
Contrary  to  the  usual  notion  on  this  subject,  the  wishes  of  the  young 
people  are  generally  consulted.  The  statement  sometimes  made 
that  the  wife  in  Japan  is  a  mere  chattel,  to  be  lightly  acquired  or 
disposed  of,  is  absolutely  false.  Divorces  among  the  better  classes 
are  scarcely  more  frequent,  or  more  frequently  sought,  than  in  many 
parts  of  our  own  country.  Our  tricky  divorce  lawyers  would  starve 
in  Japan.  If  a  divorce  is  demanded,  the  matter  must  be  laid  before 
the  families  of  the  couple,  with  the  intermediary  spoken  of,  as  ar 
bitrators,  and  neither  the  man  nor  the  woman  can  be  released  from 
the  marriage  vow  without  their  concurrence.  As  divorce  must  re 
sult  in  the  sending  of  the  wife  back  to  the  father  for  support, 
separations,  without  a  grave  and  sufficient  reason,  are  not  easily 
obtained. 

The  position  of  a  wife,  and  especially  of  a  mother,  in  Japan,  is 
all  that  a  true  woman  can  desire.  It  is  not  the  custom,  except  on 
special  occasions,  for  women  to  mingle  with  men  who  are  not  of 
their  own  family  by  blood  or  marriage.  The  restriction  is  not  im 
posed  by  the  legal  lord  alone,  it  is  a  part  of  the  family  organization, 
and  by  the  family  imposed  for  the  promotion  of  morality  and  good 
order  in  society.  Nothing  can  exceed  the  beauty  and  harmony  of 
the  Japanese  when  at  home.  Disrespect  and  disobedience  to  par 
ents  are  rare,  and  we  have  often  been  compelled  to  contrast  the 
family  discipline  of  Japan  with  that  of  our  own,  much  to  our  own 
mortification." 

EARLY   BETROTHAL    EOR    POLITICAL    PURPOSES. 

"Now  Herod  brought  up  his  son's  children  with  great  care  ;  for 
Alexander  had  two  sons  by  Glaphyra,  and  Aristobulus  had  three 
sons  by  Bernice,  Salome's  daughter,  and  two  daughters  ;  and  as  his 
friends  were  once  with  him,  he  presented  the  children  before  them, 


200  PROPOSAL    AND    ESPOUSAL. 

and  deploring  the  hard  fortune  of  his  own  sons,  he  prayed  that  no 
such  ill-fortune  would  befal  these  who  were  their  children,  but  that 
they  might  improve  in  virtue,  and  obtain  what  they  justly  deserved, 
and  might  make  him  amends  for  his  care  of  their  education.  He 
also  caused  them  to  betrothed  against  they  should  come  to  the 
proper  age  of  marriage  :  the  elder  of  Alexander's  sons  to  Pheroras' 
daughter,  and  Antipater's  daughter  to  Aristobulus'  eldest  son.  He 
also  allotted  one  of  Aristobulus'  daughters  to  Antipater's  son,  and 
Aristobulus'  other  daughter  to  Herod,  a  son  of  his  own,  who  was 
born  to  him  by  the  high  priest's  daughter:  for  it  is  the  ancient 
practice  among  us  to  have  many  wives  at  the  same  time.  Now  the 
king  made  these  espousals  for  the  children,  out  of  commiseration 
of  them  now  they  were  fatherless,  as  endeavoring  to  render  Anti- 
pater  kind  to  them  by  these  intermarriages. 


EARLY    P.KTROTIIAL    IN    IIINDOSTAN. 

The  Times  of  India,  commenting  on  a  remarkable  contribution 
to  the  discussion  that  has  been  going  on  for  the  last  twelve  months 
about  the  social  status  of  Hindoo  women,  their  position  in  the 
household,  and  their  relation  with  the  other  sex,  says  : 

"The  story  a  Hindoo  woman  has  to  tell  is  a  sad  one,  and  no 
doubt  all  the  sadder,  inasmuch  as  her  letter  shows  her  to  be  pos 
sessed  of  very  unusual  natural  abilities.  The  'wicked  practice  of 
early  marriage  '  has,  she  declares,  destroyed  the  happiness  of  her 
life,  coming  between  her  and  the  things  she  prizes  above  all  others 
—study  and  mental  cultivation.  '  Without  the  least  fault  of  mine 
I  am  doomed  to  seclusion  ;  every  aspiration  of  mine  to  rise  above 
my  ignorant  sisters  is  looked  upon  with  suspicion,  and  is  interpre 
ted  in  the  most  uncharitable  manner.'  She  writes  with  a  good  deal 
of  feminine  emphasis,  but  she  amply  proves  her  case,  that  the  rich 
and  poor,  old  and  young,  of  her  sex  suffer  much  misery  and  pain 
and  degradation  through  the  strict  observance  of  social  institutions 


PROPOSAL.  201 

invented  by  men  for  their  own  advantage.  Every  woman,  on  the 
death  of  her  husband,  even  if  he  be  a  child-husband,  is  condemned 
to  a  life  of  perpetual  widowhood.  But  a  man  may  not  only  marry 
a  second  wife  on  the  death  of  his  first  one,  but  can  marry  any  num 
ber  of  wives  at  one  and  the  same  time.  Even  if  he  has  only  one 
wife,  he  continues  to  live  in  the  bosom  of  his  own  family,  and  has 
never,  under  any  circumstances,  to  submit  to  the  tender  mercies  of 
a  mother-in-law.  In  India  all  the  boys  and  girls  are  betrothed  in- 
dissolubly  almost  as  soon  as  they  are  born.  At  the  age  of  eight, 
at  least,  a  husband  must  be  found  for  every  girl.  Girls  are  gener 
ally,  perhaps,  married  at  this  age,  and  their  parents  are  still  at  lib 
erty  to  send  them  to  school  until  they  are  ten  years  old.  But  after 
that  the  leave  of  the  mother-in-law  must  be  obtained.  'But  even 
in  these  advanced  times,'  exclaims  our  correspondent,  '  and  even  in 
Bombay — the  chief  centre  of  civilization — how  many  mothcrs-in- 
laws  are  there  who  send  their  daughters  to  school  after  they  are 
ten  years  old  ?'  Thus  the  girls  are  taken  away  from  school  just 
when  they  are  beginning  to  understand  and  appreciate  education. 
Even  girls  belonging  to  the  most  advanced  families  are  mothers 
before  they  are  fourteen,  and  have  thenceforth  to  devote  themselves 
to  the  hard  realities  of  life.  The  unfortunate  bride  may  neither  sit 
nor  speak  in  the  presence  of  any  elder  member  of  her  husband's 
family.  She  must  work  with  the  servants,  rise  early,  and  go  to  bed 
late,  and  be  perpetually  abused  and  frequently  beaten  by  her 
mother-in-law.  She  must  live  in  the  most  rigid  seclusion.  Her 
husband,  who  is  entirely  dependent  on  his  family,  can  never  take 
her  part,  and,  fresh  himself  from  college,  is  apt  to  despise  her  for 
her  ignorance,  and  to  tolerate  her  as  a  necessary  evil.  Our  corres 
pondent  deliberately  declares  that  '  the  treatment  which  even  ser 
vants  receive  from  their  European  masters  is  far  better  than  falls 
to  the  share  of  us  Hindoo  women.  We  are  treated  worse  than 
beasts.'  The  strength  both  of  mind  and  body  is  sapped  by  these 
early  marriages.  The  children  either  die  off  as  weakly  seedlings  or 


2O2  PROPOSAL   AND    ESPOUSAL. 

grow  up  without  vigor.  The  women  lose  their  beauty  at  twenty, 
are  long  past  their  prime  at  thirty,  and  old  at  forty.  But  a  worse 
fate  awaits  them  if  instead  of  being  Hindoo  wives  they  are  Hindoo 
widows.  Of  this  wretched  fate  our  correspondent  fortunately  knows 
nothing  personally,  and  so  cannot  write  from  experience.  But 
there  are  22,000,000  widows  in  India,  many  of  whom  lost  their 
nominal  husbands  when  they  were  children,  and  none  of  whom  can 
ever  marry  again.  For  the  rest  of  their  lives  they  are  deprived  of 
ornaments  and  colored  garments,  their  heads  are  shaved,  they  arc 
condemned  to  the  coarsest  clothes  and  the  poorest  food,  and  wear 
out  their  days  in  seclusion  as  the  low  drudges  of  the  household. 
They  have  to  live  like  nuns,  but  amid  all  the  temptations  in  a  little 
world  in  which  they  are  regarded  as  inferior  beings,  and  when  they 
hide  their  shame  they  are  handed  over  to  the  English  law  for 
punishment  " 


It  may  truly  be  said  with  regard  to  early  marriages,  that  "opin 
ions  differ,"  not  only  among  individuals  but  amcng  nations  also, 
and  oftentimes  among  those  of  the  same  name  and  nation.  With 
regard  to  the  ancient  inhabitants  of  Greece  and  Rome,  we  find  the 
sages  giving  various  and  even  diverse  counsels.  Among  the  for 
mer,  for  instance.  "The  time  of  marriage  was  not  the  same  in  all 
places.  The  Spartans  were  not  permitted  to  marry  till  they  arrived 
at  their  full  strength,  and  though  we  do  not  find  what  was  the  ex 
act  number  of  years  they  were  confined  to,  yet  it  appears  from  one 
of  Lycurgus'  sayings  that  both  men  and  women  were  limited  in  this 
affair  ;  which  that  lawgiver  being  asked  the  reason  of,  said  his  de 
sign  was  that  Spartan  children  might  be  strong  and  vigorous. 

The  Athenian  laws  are  said  once  to  have  ordered  that  men 
.should  not  marry  till  above  35  years  of  age  ;  for  human  life  being 
divided  by  Solon  into  ten  weeks  (or  sevens),  he  affirmed  that  in  the 
fifth  of  these  weeks  men  were  of  ripeness  to  multiply  their  kind. 


PROPOSAL.  203 

But    this  depended  upon    the  humor  of  every  Lawgiver,  nothing 
being  generally  agreed  on  in  this  matter. 

Aristotle  thought  37  a  good  age  ;  Plato,  30  ;  and  Hesiod  was 
much  of  the  same  judgment,  for  thus  he  advises  his  friend 

The  time  to  enter  on  a  married  life 

Is  about  thirty,  then  bring  home  a  wife  ; 

But  don't  delay  too  late,  or  wed  too  young, 

Since  strength  and  prudence  to  this  state  belong. 

Women  married  sooner  than  men.  Some  of  the  old  Athenian 
laws  permitted  them  to  marry  at  26.  Aristotle  at  18,  Hesiod  at  15. 
The  poet  advising  that  woman  be  permitted  to  grow  to  maturity  in 
four  years,  i.  e.,  four  after  ten,  and  marry  in  the  fifth,  i.  e.,  the  fif 
teenth.  Others  think  he  means  they  might  continue  unmarried 
four  years  after  their  arrival  at  woman's  estate,  i.  e.,  at  fourteen 
years,  and  marry  in  the  fifth,  i.  e.,  the  nineteenth. 

But  as  the  women  were  sooner  marriageable  than  men,  so  their 
time  was  far  shorter,  it  being  common  for  men  to  marry  much  older 
than  women  could  expect  to  'do,  as  Lysistrate  complains  in  Aris 
tophanes  : 

L.  Y. — It's  some  concern  to  me  when  I  reflect 

On  the  poor  girls  that  must  despair  of  men, 
And  keep  a  stale  and  loathed  celibacy. 

P.  R. — What,  havn't  the  men  the  same  hard  measures,  then  ? 

L.  Y. — Oh  no,  they  have  a  more  propitious  fate, 

Since  they  at  sixty  when  their  vigor's  past 
Can  wed  a  young  and  tender  spouse  to  warm 
Their  aged  limbs  and  to  repair  their  years ; 
But  woman's  joys  are  short  and  transient, 
For  if  we  once  the  golden  minutes  miss 


20-4  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

There's  no  recalling,  so  severc's  our  doom  ; 
\Yc  must  then  long  in  vain,  in  vain  expect, 
And  by  our  ills  forewarn  posterity." 

But  whether  marrying  early  or  late,  they  were  all  expected  to 
enter  the  marriage  state  when  opportunity  allowed. 

"  The  ancients  believed  in  matrimony.  Among  the  Romans  all 
men  of  full  age  were  compelled  by  law  to  marry,  and  an  ancient 
English  law  obliged  all  men  of  twenty-five  and  upward  to  marry." 

Modem  times  allow  a  good  deal  of  liberty  in  this  respect,  and 
we  fortunately  arc  free  from  any  iron-bound  custom  on  the  matri 
monial  matter.  In  America,  where  warmer  climes  promote  a  pri 
mer  growth,  (for  there  is  an  evident  connection  between  genial  suns 
and  early  marriages),  it  is  no  uncommon  thing  to  see  a  young  miss 
married  midway  of  her  teens.  And  by-and-by,  judging  from  the 
precocity  of  this  stcam-and-lightning  age,  we  shall  have  proposals 
made  and  betrothals  arranged  in  the  go-cart. 


THAT    LITTLE   GIRL. 

The  jovial  captain  of  one  of  the  steamships  now  in  port  tells  a 
good  story  relative  to  the  May  and  December  marriages  so  common 
in  Brazil,  A  Brazilian  gentleman,  apparently  over  50  years  of  age, 
was  a  passenger  on  his  vessel.  He  was  accompanied  by  two  girls, 
one  about  15,  and  the  other  younger.  The  gentleman  was  sea-sick 
in  the  cabin,  and  the  girls  were  on  deck,  whereupon  the  captain 
endeavored  to  amuse  them — took  them  on  his  knees,  and  told  them 
stories,  while  he  enjoyed  their  prattle  and  pretty  smiles.  In  the 
midst  of  this  pleasant  occupation  the  gentleman  came  on  deck. 
With  a  fierce  expression  he  gazed  upon  the  scene  for  a  moment, 
and  then  inquired  in  a  harsh,  husky  voice  :  "  You,  sir  ;  are  you  mar 
ried  ?"  "  Yes  ;  I  have  a  daughter  older  than  your  little  girl  here," 
said  the  captain.  "She  reminds  me  very  much  of  mine."  Here  he 


PROPOSAL.  2O5 

patted  the  pretty  cheek.  "That  little  girl,  sir,"  exclaimed  the  in 
dignant  Brazilian,  with  great  emphasis,  "that  little  girl  is  my  wife, 
sir."  The  captain  collapsed. 


Among  us  men  are  of  age  at  twenty-one  ;  among  the  Romans 
they  were  so  at  twenty-five  ;  among  the  Jews  thirteen  years  and 
one  day.  Females  were  of  age  according  as  circumstances  regula 
ted  it — "the  time  appointed  by  the  father."  The  father  by  his  last 
will  might  fix  any  time  for  male  or  female. 

Timothy  was  a  young  man  ;  but  as  among  the  Greeks  and 
Romans  the  state  of  youth  was  extended  to  thirty  years,  no  respec 
table  young  men  were  permitted  to  drink  wine  before  that  time  ; 
and  though  he  was  now  thirty-five  years  of  age,  yet  he  might  still 
feel  himself  under  the  custom  of  his  country  relative  to  drinking 
wine,  for  his  father  was  a  Greek  (Acts  xvi.  i)  ;  and  through  the  in 
fluence  of  his  Christian  profession,  he  might  still  continue  to  abstain 
from  wine,  drinking  water  only. — Pictorial  Explanatory  New  Tes 
tament. 


CONSENT  OF  PARENTS  REQUIRED. 

Virgins  were  not  allowed  to  marry  without  the  consent  of  their 
parents  ;.  whence  Hero  in  Leander  in  Museus  tells  Leandcr  they 
could  not  be  honorably  joined  in  marriage,  because  her  parents 
"were  against  it  : 

"  My  parents  to  the  match  will  not  consent, 
Therefore  desist,  it  is  not  pertinent." 

Hesmione  in  Euripides  professes  she  had  no  concern  about  her 
marriage,  but  left  that  wholly  to  her  father: 

"I'm  not  concerned,  my  father  will  take  care 
Of  all  things  that  respect  my  nuptials." 


206  PROPOSAL   AND    ESPOUSAL. 

i'hc  mother's  consent  was  necessary  as  well  as  the  father's  ;  nor 
.vere  men  permitted  to  marry  without  consulting  their  parents,  for 
even  the  most  early  and  ignorant  ages  were  too  well  acquainted 
\vith  the  right  which  parents  have  over  their  children  to  think  these 
had  power  to  dispose  of  themselves  without  their  parents'  consent. 

Acchilles  in  Homer  refuses  Agamemnon's  daughter,  and  leaves 
it  to  his  father  Pclcns  to  choose  him  a  wife  : 

"If  by  heaven's  blessing  I  return  a  bride, 
My  careful  father  will  for  me  provide." 


BETROTHAL    DISPENSED    WITH. 

In  the  East  you  scarcely  ever  sec  a  woman's  face  on  the  streets. 
A  man  does  not  even  see  his  intended  wife's  before  marriage,  and 
not  then  unless  he  has  paid  for  her.  In  Mohammedan  countries 
all  brides  are  sold  to  the  highest  bidder,  the  same  as  horses  or 
camels,  the  money  to  be  paid  on  delivery.  Even  after  marriage  the 
wife  is  kept  like  a  prisoner  in  the  harem,  and  always  closely  veiled 
when  she  appears  in  public. 


T  HAS  been  said  that  every  man  is  a  hero  at  least  twice 
in  his  brief  earthly  history,  namely,  at  his  birth  and  at 
his  death  ;  and  the  married  man,  of  course,  adds  another 
heroic  period  to  his  existence — that  of  his  wedding  day. 
Everybody  feels  a  passing  interest  in  the  nuptial  pair,  and 
in  the  happy  bridegroom  little  less  than  in  his  fairer  bride 
To  this  interesting  epoch  in  a  man's  probationary  state  all  things 
fair  and  pleasant  are  compared. 

"  The  world  is  a  wedding,"  says  the  Talmud,  and  that  authority 
also  avers  in  kindred  sentiment,  that  "youth  is  a  wreath  of  roses." 
And  when,  with  vicing,  varied  beauty,  youth  meets  youth — gentler 
youth  with  stronger  youth — with  the  glory  fresh  in  them  of  their 
charming,  mutual  prime,  what  sight  on  earth  can  be  nobler  and 
fairer  withal  ? 

The  sun,  himself,  is  compared  to  one  of  the  contracting  parties, 
which  is  as  a  bridegroom  coming  out  of  his  chamber  on  his  marriage 
morn,  and  "rejoiceth  as  a  strong  man  to  run  a  race."  And  the  earth 
is  compared  to  the  other  (as  also  the  Jewish  church).  "  Thou  shalt 
be  called  Heppzibah  (my  delight  in  her — the  same  name  as  Heze- 
kiah's  then  reigning  queen)  and  thy  land  Beulah  (married),  for  the 
Lord  delighteth  in  thee,  and  thy  land  shall  be  married." 

H*  209 


2IO  PROPOSAL   AND    ESPOUSAL. 

Even  the  dumb  world  is  a  wedding,  and  the  earth  is  the  bride 
~>f  the  sun.  For  every  springtime,  with  the  return  of  the  "  King  of 
:lay  "  from  his  wintry  solstice,  or  stopping  place,  the  earth  "  renews 
her  mighty  youth  ;"  and,  lo  !  this  silent  sphere,  which  is  turned  as 
clay  to  the  seal,  to  be  stamped  afresh  with  life  and  beauty,  grows 
cheerful  in  his  beaming  and  benignant  smile.  And  see  !  beneath 
his  cheering  ray,  for  there  is  nothing  hid  from  the  heat  thereof,  the 
erstwhile  barren  ground  "  brings  forth  and  buds  ;"  and  the  dumb 
air  grows  tuneful  with  songs  of  myriad  birds  that  hail  the  nuptials 
of  the  celestial  with  the  terrcstial  ;  and  the  low  world  is  yoked,  like 
a  buoyant  car,  to  this  heavenly  courser,  and  is  borne  along  and 
high  aloft  among  the  circling,  sister,  planetary  chariots  in  his  mag 
nificent  train,  as  he  makes  the  stupendous  passage  of  the  ecliptic. 

The  clouds,  too,  seem  wedded  to  the  mountains  of  the  earth, 
and  oftentimes  rest  their  soft  and  snowy  forms,  fair  as  a  seraph's 
pinion,  on  their  lofty,  sky-kissing  summits.  And  behold,  also,  how 
the  migrator)-  birds — wing-linked  with  brightness — arc  married  to 
the  glowing  summer,  as  that  queen  of  beaut}'  and  of  song  makes 
her  fair-riding  tour  of  the  terraqueous  globe,  and  woo  her  forever, 
as  they  follow  her  zone-sweeping  train  about  the  mighty  circuit  of 
the  habitable  globe. 

Yes,  even  so,  the  dull  earth,  for  nature  loves  contrasts,  is  mar 
ried  to  the  bright  sun,  and  the  low  earth  is  joined  by  attraction  to 
the  high  sun,  and  the  slow  earth  is  united  by  impulsion  to  the  swift 
sun,  whose  surpassing  velocity  induced  the  heathen  to  offer  only 
white  chariot  horses  in  solar  sacrifice,  and  the  cold  earth  is  wedded 
to  the  warm  sun,  with  his  vivifying  and  eternally  fructifying  power, 
and  from  this  auspicious  union  comes  all  her  fruitfulness  and  glory. 

And  the  soul,  too,  of  man  may  well  be  described  as  being  mar 
ried  to  his  body  in  most  subtle,  sacred  bond,  with  union  dear  and 

precious. 

"  More  closely  wed  than  married  pair." 


ESPOUSAL.  21  i 

The  marriage  tie  being  the  "  silver  cord  "  of  Solomon's  wond 
rous,  mystic  song,  or  the  fine,  spinal  marrow  that  holds  the  "golden 
bowl,"  and  runs  a  sentient  thread  down  all  the  trunk-supporting 
vertebra. 

But  the  Jews  say,  with  regard  to  Moses  dying  alone  on  Mount 
Horeb,  that  "  God  kissed  his  soul  out  of  him,"  thus  suggesting  the 
gentleness  and  painlessness  of  his  possible  death.  So  grace  may, 
through  the  mercy  of  God,  soften  the  rigors  of  dissolving  sense,  and 
divine  love  may  brighten  the  dark  approach  of  the  "  king  of  terrors," 
even  as  a  black  face  shines  when  the  sun  bursts  full  upon  it.  And 
though  philosophy  and  science  stand  mute,  with  their  "hand  upon 
their  mouth,"  hard  by  the  last,  terribly-trying  scene  of  stern,  dis 
solving  nature,  and  fail  to  whisper  living  hope  or  breathe  a  breath 
of  heavenly  consolation  ;  yet  the  Bible,  blessed  word,  opens  fresh, 
inspiring  page,  full  of  the  energy  of  the  resurrection  ;  and  the  de 
parting  soul  grows  bright  with  the  promise,  and  buoyant  with  eter 
nal  expectation,  and  pledges  to  the  shuddering  flesh,  which  now 
must  die  and  leave  her,  that  she  will  meet  it  again  beyond  the 
river,  and  remarry  it  in  renewed  power  and  glory  on  the  great  day 
of  God  ;  and  beckoning  it  onward  in  triumph,  she  flaps  her  freed 
wings  upward,  singing,  "  I  know  that  my  Redeemer  liveth,  and 
though  after  my  skin,  worms  destroy  this  body,  yet  in  my  flesh 
shall  I  see  God,  whom  I  shall  see  for  myself,  and  mine  eyes  shall 
behold  and  not  another." 


^m^^^m^^W^l^^^Y^^^^^^ 

<m;:m:mmmKwmmmmm?m 


THE    DIVINE    ESPOUSALS. 


The  love  that  crowns  one  king  of  men 

Is  not  for  idle  telling  ; 
'Tis  deep  and  still,  yet  strong  as  death, 

The  love  of  man  excelling.—  MAt  GAUET  ROBBING. 


v*  'O   FORTH,  O   yc  daughters  of  Zion,  and   behold  king 

'"•  \ 


Solomon  with  the  crown  wherewith  his  mother  crowned 
him  in  the  day  of  his  espousals,  and  in  the  day  of  the 
gladness  of  his  heart." 

v  -^ 

^•(;  It  was  customary  among  the   ancients   to  adorn  the 


heads  of  newly  married  couples  with  liedit  wreaths,  or 
•>.:..V 

^)  marriage  crowns,  as  if  to  show  that  this  was  the  crown 
ing  day  of  their  several  lives.  In  accordance  with  this  general 
usage,  Bathshcba,  the  queen  mother  herself,  bedecks  the  head  of 
her  son,  the  young  prince  Solomon,  and  hence  the  invitation,  with 
its  mystical  meaning  of  the  union  subsisting  between  Christ  and 
his  church;  and  all  are  invited  to  the  "  marriage  supper  of  the  Lamb," 
for  "  behold  a  greater  than  Solomon  is  here." 

YcrVQ} 

Arrayed  in  glittering  white, 

With  marriage  wreath  bedecked, 
Awaiting  nuptial  rite — 

Behold  the  Lord's  elect. 

212 


ESPOUSAL,  213 


The  fair  Bathsheba's  son, 
Himself  surpassing  fair ; 

The  glorious  Solomon, 

His  wealth  beyond  compare. 

But  though  the  head  be  crowned 
With  light  of  blazing  gems, 

Except  the  heart  be  sound 
In  vain  are  diadems. 

Tis  not  the  cap  of  state, 
Nor  joyful  nuptial  crown, 

That  makes  the  king  so  great, 
Tis  love,  and  love  alone. 


THE   SPOUSE'S   ADMIRATION    OF    HIM. 

"This  is  my  beloved,  and  this  is  my  friend,  O  ye  daughters  of 
Jerusalem." 

O,  ye  companions,  list  to  me, 

For  my  beloved  is  fair  ; 
His  days  are  from  eternity, 
His  love  beyond  compare. 

Where'er  I  go,  he  leadeth  me, 

He  moveth  by  my  side  ; 
My  bright,  my  heavenly  bridegroom  he, 

And  I,  his  blushing  bride. 


She  shall  be  brought  to  the  king  in  raiment  of  needlework,  &C. 
— Canticles. 


214  PROPOSAL   AND    ESPOUSAL. 

My  bridal  wreath  is  Christian  joy. 

And  sanctity  my  dress  ; 
My  banquet,  bliss,  without  alloy, 

My  robe  is  righteousness. 

My  chain  of  gold  is  his  commands, 
My  girdling  zone,  his  truth  ; 

And  Zion's  vows  my  golden  bands, 
My  bloom — immortal  youth. 

His  covenant  my  marriage  ring, 
His  smile  my  sun  and  moon  ; 

His  love  is  all  the  song  1  sing, 
And  glory  is  my  tune. 

O,  ye  companions,  list  to  me, 
Come  with  me  to  his  place  \ 

Pavilioned  in  his  brightness  be, 
And  taste  his  mighty  grace. 


THE    KING'S    DAUGHTER,    OR    THE    ROYAL    BRIDE. 

"The  king's  daughter  is  all  glorious  within  ;  her  clothing  is  of 
wrought  gold. 

She  shall  be  brought  unto  the  king  in  raiment  of  needlework  ; 
the  virgins,  her  companions  that  follow  her,  shall  be  brought  unto 
thee. 

With  gladness  and  rejoicing  shall  they  be  brought  ;  they  shall 
enter  into  the  king's  palace." 


"But  what  saith  the  Scriptures?  'The  King's  daughter  is  all 
glorious  within,'  (Ps.  xlv.,)  and  as  ships  which  are  the  fairest  in 
show,  yet  are  not  always  the  fittest  for  use  ;  so  neither  arc  women 


ESPOUSAL.  215 

the  more  to  be  esteemed,  but  the  more  to  be  suspected,  for  their 
fair  trappings  ;  yet  we  condemn  not  in  greater  personages  the  use 
of  ornaments  ;  yea,  we  teach  that  silver,  silks,  and  gold  were  created 
not  only  for  the  necessity,  but  also  far  ornament  of  the  saints.  In 
the  practice  whereof,  Rebekah,  a  holy  woman,  is  noted  to  have 
received  from  Isaac,  a  holy  man,  even  ear-rings,  habiliments,  and 
bracelets  of  gold,  (Gen.  xxiv.,)  therefore  this  is  it  we  teach  for  rules 
of  Christian  sobriety,  that  if  a  woman  neither  exceed  decency  in 
fashion,  nor  the  limits  of  her  state  and  degree,  and  that  she  be 
proud  of  nothing,  we  see  no  reason  but  she  may  wear  anything. 

It  followeth  that  she  is  like  a  ship,  but  what  a  ship?  A  ship  of 
merchants — no  doubt  a  great  commendation,  for  the  kingdom  of 
heaven  is  like  a  merchant  (Matt,  xiii.),  and  merchants  have  been 
princes  (Isa.  xxiii.),  and  princes  are  gods  (Ps.  Ixxxii.)  The  mer 
chant  is  of  all  men  most  laborious  for  his  life,  the  most  adventurous 
in  his  labor,  the  mcrt  peaceable  upon  the  sea,  the  most  profitable 
to  the  land  ;  yea,  the  merchant  is  the  combination  and  union  of 
lands  and  countries,  She  is  a  like  a  ship  of  merchants,  therefore 
first  to  be  reckoned,  as  ye  see,  among  the  laity  ;  not  like  a  fisher 
man's  boat,  not  like  St.  Peter's  ship,  for  Christ  did  call  no  she 
apostles.  Indeed,  it  is  commendable  in  a  woman  when  she  is  able 
by  her  wisdom  to  instruct  her  children,  and  to  give  at  opportunities 
good  counsel  to  her  husband  ;  but  when  women  shall  take  upon 
them,  as  many  have  done,  to  build  churches,  and  to  chalk  out  dis 
cipline  for  the  church,  this  is  neither  commendable  nor  tolerable  ; 
for  'her  hands,'  saith  Solomon,  'must  handle  the  spindle,'  (ver  19), 
the  spindle  or  the  cradle,  but  neither  the  altar  nor  the  temple  ;  for 
St.  John  commendeth  even  to  the  elect  lady,  not  so  much  her  talk 
ing,  as  her  walking  in  the  commandments  (2  John  v.  6) ;  ther-fore 
to  such  preaching  women  it  may  be  answered,  as  St.  Bernard  some 
times  answered  the  image  of  the  blessed  Virgin,  at  the  great  church 
at  Sire,  in  Germany.  Bernard  was  no  sooner  come  into  the  church 
but  the  image  straight  saluted  him,  and  bade  him,  '  Good  morrow, 


216  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL 

Bernard  ;'  whereat  Bernard,  well  knowing  the  jugglery  of  the  friars, 
made  answer  again  out  of  St.  Paul :  '  O,  your  ladyship  hath  forgot 
yourself;  it  is  not  lawful  for  a  woman  to  speak  in  the  church.' 


The  bride  that  hath  good  cheer  within,  and  good  music,  and  a 
good  bridegroom  with  her,  may  be  merry,  though  the  hail  chance 
to  rattle  upon  the  tiles  without  upon  her  wedding  day;  though  the 
world  should  rattle  about  his  ears,  a  man  ma}*  sit  merry  that  sits 
at  the  feast  of  a  good  conscience  ;  nay,  the  child  of  God,  by  virtue 
of  this,  in  the  midst  of  the  waves  of  affliction,  is  as  secure  as  that 
child,  which  in  a  shipwreck  was  upon  a  plank  with  his  mother,  till 
she  awaked  him  securely  sleeping,  and  then  with  his  pretty  coun 
tenance  sweetly  smiling,  and  by-and-by  sportingly  asking  a  stroke 
to  beat  the  naught)*  waves,  and  at  last,  when  the}*  continued  bois 
terous  for  all  that,  sharply  chiding  them,  as  though  the}-  had  been 
but  his  playfellows.  O  the  innocency  !  O  the  comfort  of  peace  ! 
O  the  tranquility  of  a  spotless  mind  !  There  is  no  heaven  so  clear 
as  a  good  conscience.  —  Sennon  by  Robert  Wilkinson,  of  Cambridge, 
preached  before  the  Kings  Majestv  at  the  nuptials  of  an  Honourable 
Lord  and  Lad. 


TIIK  BRIDEGROOM'S  ADMIRATION  or  TIIK  P.RIDI-;. 

"Thy    lips   are    like    a    thread    of   scarlet,    and    thy   speech   is 
comely." 

O  blessed  lips  ! 

The  wild  bee  sips 
At  no  such  fount  of  nectarcd  juice, 

As  those  that  hear 

Thy  speech  with  fear 
And  know  truth's  ordinance  and  use. 


ESPOUSAL.  217 

Like  scarlet  thread, 

So  lively  red, 
With  saving  health  and  hallowed  blood  ; 

Thy  testimony 

Drops  like  honey, 
And  still  proclaims  the  Christ  of  God. 


How  beautiful  are  thy  feet  with  shoes,  O  prince's   daughter  !' 

How  beautiful  those  feet  with  shoes, 
Which  gospel  preparations  use  ! 

They  win  their  way 

Like  light  of  day, 
And  who  their  entrance  would  refuse. 


"  Thou  a«rt  comely  through  my  comeliness,  which  I  have  put 

upon  thee." 

O  glorious  dress  —  . 

Christ's  righteousness  ! 
Whose  shadowy  train  love's  pattern  bears  ; 

Fair  'broidery, 

Which  angels  see, 
And  glory  decks  the  robe  she  wears. 


"  Thy  temples  are  like   a  piece  of  pomegranate   (a  cut  pome 
granate  showing  the  red  juice  inside)  within  thy  locks. 

Contrition's  flush, 

Pure  virtue's  blush, 
So  well  thy  countenance  doth  grace  ; 

Like  pulp  of  wine, 

Thy  temples  shine, 
While  heaven  approves  with  smiling  face. 


21  8  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

Repentance  meet- 

Compunction  sweet  — 
And  holy  shame's  suffusive  glow, 

Thy  brows  adorn, 

Like  rosy  morn, 
And  love's  red  seal  enstamps  thee  now. 


"The  smell  of  thy  garments  is  like  the  smell  of  Lebanon  " 

With  odors  sweet, 

Her  welcome  feet 
Now  tread  the  golden  palace  floor  , 

And  clearly  o'et 

The  pearly  door 
Is  writ  :   "  They  shall  go  out  no  more." 


"The  smell  of  thy  nose  is  like  apples." 

Her  grateful  breath 
Revives  e'en  death, 

"The  smell  like  apples"  —  Scripture  saith 
She  breatheth  bloom, 
E'en  through  the  tomb, 
And  fills  the  world  with  choice  perfume. 


"  Thou  art  all  fair  my  love  ;  there  is  no  spot  in  thee 

O  spotless  fair  ! 

Beyond  compare, 
Sweet  Zion,  bound  by  sacred  vows  ; 

Be  thine  our  state, 

All  new-create 
Meek  members  of  the  heavenly  spouse 


ESPOUSAL.  219 

"  Forget  also  thine  own  people,  and  thy  father's  house,  so  shall 
the  king  greatly  desire  thy  beauty,  for  he  is  thy  lord,  and  worship 
thou  him." 

She  shall  come  before  the  king. 
Royal  praises  she  shall  sing 
In  his  ear, 
Sweet  and  clear, 
Like  sounding  chime  of  silver  sphere 


THE    BRIDAL   CHARIOT,   OR    NUPTIAL   COUCH. 
"  King  Solomon  made  himself  a  chariot  of  the  wood  of  Lebanon 

He  made  the  pillars  thereof  of  silver,  the  bottom  thereof  of 
gold,  the  covering  of  it  of  purple,  the  midst  thereof  being  paved 
with  love,  for  the  daughters  of  Jerusalem." 

"  Behold  his  bed,  which  is  Solomon's  ;  threescore  valiant  men 
are  about  it,  of  the  valiant  of  Israel. 

They  all  hold  swords,  being  expert  in  war  :  every  man  hath  his 
sword  upon  his  thigh  because  of  fear  in  the  night." 

After  these  preliminaries,  the  bride  was  generally  conducted 
from  her  father's  house  to  that  of  the  bridegroom  in  a  chariot, 
drawn  by  a  pair  of  mules  or  oxen,  and  furnished  with  a  kind  of 
couch,  as  a  seat.  On  either  side  of  her  sat  the  bridegroom  and  one 
of  his  most  intimate  friends  or  relations. 

Mention  is  expressly  made  in  Hesiod  of  the  carriage  which  was 
used  on  this  solemn  occasion  ;  for  driving  in  chariots  is  character 
istic  of  the  heroic  age,  and  is  appropriate  either  to  high  festivals 
a«d  solemnities,  or  to  great  distances.  Torches  were  carried  by 
the  side. 


220  PROPOSAL   AND    ESPOUSAL. 

The  nuptial  procession  was  probably  accompanied,  according 
to  circumstances,  by  a  nnmber  of  persons,  some  of  whom  carried 
the  nuptial  torches,  and  in  some  places,  as  in  Boetia,  it  was  custom 
ary  to  burn  the  axle  of  the  carriage  on  its  arrival  at  the  bride 
groom's  house,  as  a  symbol  that  the  bride  was  to  remain  at  home, 
and  not  go  abroad.  If  the  bridegroom  had  been  married  before, 
the  bride  was  not  conducted  to  his  house  by  himself,  but  by  one  of 
his  friends. 

The  Greeks  kept  the  marriage  bed  as  a  relic  in  the  court,  just 
opposite  the  door  of  the  house.  —  Anthonys  Greece. 


Thou  satcst  upon  a  stately  bed.  Upon  a 

lofty  and  high  mountain  hast  thou  made  thy  bed.  —  Bible. 

I  have  decked  my  bed  with  coverings  of  tapestry    with   carved 
works,  with  fine  linen  of  Egypt. 

I  have  perfumed  my  bed  with  myrrh,  and  aloes,  and  cinnamon. 
—  Proverbs. 


MARRIAGE    FELICITIES. 


i  ARRIAGE  (Matt.  xxii.  2)  is  a  divine  institution.  It  is 
also  a  civil  contract,  (Gen.  ii.  21)  uniting  one  man  and 
one  woman  together  in  the  relation  of  husband  and 
wif"e-  Among  the  benefits  of  the  institution  are  (i), 
>''  Domestic  comfort  ;  (2)  Provision  for  the  health,  edu 
cation,  and  support  of  children  ;  (3)  The  distribution  of  society 
into  families,  or  small  communities,  with  a  master  as  governor  over 
them,  who  has  natural  as  well  as  legal  authority  ;  (4)  The  security 
which  arises  from  parental  anxiety,  and  the  confinement  of  children 
to  permanent  habitations  ;  and  (5),  The  encouragement  of  industry. 
No  sins  are  more  frequently  and  pointedly  condemned  by  the 
Bible,  than  such  as  violate  or  impair  the  sacredness  of  the  marriage 
relation  ;  and  nothing  is  wanting  to  raise  this  to  the  highest,  purest 
and  most  sacred  relation  in  which  two  human  beings  can  stand  to 
each  other,  but  obedience  to  the  precepts  of  the  Holy  Scriptures  on 
this  subject." 

"MARRIAGE    IS   HONOURABLE    IN    ALL." 

Marriage  is  born  of  the  skies, 

And  woman  for  man  was  made  fair, 

And  the  sweetest  and  tend'rest  of  ties 
Are  those  which  unite  wedded  pair. 


222  PROPOSAL    AM)    ESPOUSAL. 

4 1  will  make  a  help  meet,'  it  was  said, 

When  man  stood  in  Eden  alone, 
And  so  out  of  his  side — not  his  head — 

Was  made  '  flesh  of  flesh,  bone  of  bone.' 

And  woman  stood  forth  to  the  view, 
Fair  woman  !  sweet  creature  of  God  ; 

And  thus  out  of  one  were  made  two, 

Then  two  were  made  one,  which  seems  odd. 

So  bachelors  all  take  a  wife, 

You  cannot  improve  on  God's  plan  ; 

She'll  double  the  joys  of  your  life, 
And  finish  your  growth  as  a  man. 

The  foregoing  effusion,  written  and  presented  as  a  "bridal  gift," 
at  a  wedding  not  a  thousand  miles  from  Brantford,  Ontario,  is  not 
inserted  here  merely  to  fill  up  space,  or  to  please  the  ear  with  the 
jingle  of  light  rhyme  ;  but  from  a  belief  in  the  truth  of  the  genial 
matter  therein  contained,  and  we  find  ourself  in  excellent  company 
withal — which  though  Apocryphal  in  name,  is  yet  not  so  in  senti 
ment,  when  it  says,  "  Blessed  is  the  man  that  hath  a  virtuous  wife, 
for  the  number  of  his  days  shall  be  doubled." 

"The  grace  of  a  wife  delighteth  her  husband,  and  her  discretion 
will  fatten  his  bones. 

As  the  sun  when  it  riscth  in  the  high  heavens,  so  is  the  beauty 
of  a  good  wife  in  the  ordering  of  the  house." 

The  Greeks  called  a  married  man  by  a  name,  which  signified 
"complete,"  implying  that  an  unmarried  one  was  not  altogether 
perfect :  and  rightly  so,  for,  as  saith  the  poet : 

A  wife's  a  man's  best  piece;  who  till  he  marries, 
Wants  making  up  :  she  is  the  shrine  to  which 
Nature  doth  send  us  forth  on  pilgrimage  ; 
She  was  a  scion  taken  from  that  tree, 


ESPOUSAL.  223 

Into  which,  if  she  has  no  second  grafting, 
The  world  can  have  no  fruit  ;  she  is  man's 
Arithmetic,  which  teaches  him  to  number 
And  multiply  himself  in  his  own  children  ; 
She  is  the  good  man's  paradise,  and  the  bad's 
First  step  to  heaven,  a  treasure  which,  who  wants, 
Cannot  be  trusted  to  posterity, 
Nor  pay  his  own  debts  ;  she's  a  golden  sentence 
Writ  by  our  Maker,  which  the  angels  may 
Discourse  of,  only  men  know  how  to  use, 
And  none  but  devils  violate. — S/tirley. 

And  the  gallant  Pope,  deformed  and  unshapely  as  he  was,  comes 
to  woman's  defence,  and  rightly  champions  her  cause,  when  he 
sings  : 

Some  wicked  wits  have  libell'd  all  the  fair  ; 

With  matchless  impudence  they  style  a  wife 

The  dear-bought  curse  and  lawful  plague  of  life  ; 

A  bosom  serpent,  a  domestic  evil, 

A  night  invasion,  and  a  mid-day  devil. 

Let  not  the  wise  these  sland'rous  words  regard, 

But  curse  the  bones  of  ev'ry  lying  bard, 

All  other  goods  by  fortune's  hands  are  given,— 

A  wife  is  the  peculiar  gift  of  Heaven 

A  wife  !  ah,  gentle  deities,  can  he 

That  has  a  wife,  e'er  feel  adversity  ? 

Would  men  but  follow  what  the  sex  advise, 

All  things  would  prosper,  all  the  world  grow  wise. 


"  Marriage  was  very  honourable  in  several  of  the  Grecian  Com 
monwealths,  being  very  much  encouraged  by  their  laws,  as  the 
abstaining  from  it  was  discountenanced,  and  in  some  places  pun 
ished  ;  for  the  strength  of  States  consisting  in  their  number  of  peo- 


224  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

pie,  those  that  refused  to  contribute  to  their  increase,  \verc  thought 
very  cold  in  their  affections  to  their  country.  The  Lacedemonians 
are  very  remarkable  for  their  severity  against  those  who  deferred 
marrying,  as  well  as  those  who  wholly  abstained  from  it  No  man 
among  them  could  live  without  a  wife  beyond  the  time  limited  by 
their  Lawgiver,  without  incurring  several  penalties  ;  as  first,  the 
magistrates  commanded  such,  once  every  winter,  to  run  round  the 
public  Forum  nude  ;  and  to  increase  their  shame,  they  sung  a  cer 
tain  song,  the  words  whereof  aggravated  their  crime,  and  exposed 
them  to  ridicule.  Another  of  their  punishments  was,  to  be  exclu 
ded  from  the  exercises  wherein  young  virgins  contended.  A  third 
penalty  was  inflicted  upon  a  certain  solemnity,  wherein  the  women 
dragged  them  round  an  altar,  beating  them  all  the  time  with  their 
fists.  Lastly  they  were  deprived  of  that  respect  and  observance, 
which  the  younger  sort  were  obliged  to  pay  to  their  elders  ;  and 
therefore  saith  Plutarch,  no  man  found  fault  with  what  was  said  to 
Dercyllidas,  a  great  captain,  and  one  that  had  commanded  armies, 
who  coming  into  the  place  of  Assembly,  a  young  man,  instead  cf 
rising  and  making  room,  told  him,  'Sir,  you  must  not  expect  that 
houour  from  me  being  young,  which  cannot  be  returned  to  me  by 
a  child  of  yours  when  I  am  old.'  To  these  we  may  add  the  Athe 
nian  law,  whereby  all  that  were  commanders,  orators,  or  intrusted 
with  any  public  affairs,  were  to  be  married  and  have  children." 

For,  says  Solomon,  In  the  multitude  of  people  is  the  king's 
honour  ;  but  in  the  want  of  people  is  the  destruction  of  the 
prince. 

And  the  first  commandment  (after  the  prohibition)  is,  Be  fruitful 
and  multiply,  and  replenish  the  earth.  Whereupon  some  have 
made  it  a  question,  whether  this  is  not  a  command,  obliging  all  men 
to  marriage  and  procreation,  as  most  of  the  Jewish  doctors  are  of 
opinion.  But  to  this  it  may  be  replied  :  ist.  That  it  is  indeed  a 
command,  obliging  all  men  so  far  as  not  to  suffer  the  extinction  of 
mankind,  in  which  sense  it  did  absolutely  bind  Adam  and  Eve,  as 


ESPOUSAL.  225 

also  Noah,  and  his  sons,  and  their  wives,  after  the  flood.  But,  2nd 
that  it  does  not  oblige  every  particular  man  to  many,  appears  from 
the  example  of  our  Lord  Jesus,  who  lived  and  died  in  an  unmarried 
state  ;  from  his  commendation  of  those  who  made  themselves 
eunuchs  for  the  kingdom  of  God  (Matt.  xix.  12),  and  from  St. 
Paul's  frequent  approbation  of  Virginity  (i  Cor.  vii.  I,  &c.)  And 
therefore,  3rd,  it  is  here  rather  a  permission  than  a  command,  though 
it  be  expressed  in  the  form  of  a  command,  as  other  permissions  fre 
quently  are.  Vid.  Genesis  ii.  16  ;  Deuteronomy  xiv.  4.. — Po 
A  nnotations. 

And  how  well  this  command  to  "increase  and  multiply"  was 
obeyed  in  the  early  ages  of  mankind,  and  how  highly  commenda 
tory  the  fulfilment  of  it  was  among  even  the  Jews  themselves,  may 
be  inferred  from  the  fact  that  the  Hebrew  Judges  (see  Book  of 
Judges)  were  all,  or  almost  all,  men  of  large  families. 

And  Jerubbaael  the  son  of  Joash  went  and  dwelt  in  his  own 
house. 

And  Gideon  had  three  score  and  ten  sons  of  his  body  begotten  : 
for  he  had  many  wives. 

*  »  *  a 

And  he  went  unto  his  father's  house  at  Ophrah,  and  slew  his 
brethren  the  -sons  of  Jerubbaael,  being  threescore  and  ten  persons, 
upon  one  stone  :  notwithstanding  yet  Jotham  the  youngest  son  of 
Jerubbaael  was  left,  for  he  hid  himself. 

*  *  *  * 

And  after  him  arose  Jair,  a  Gileadite,  and  judged  Israel  twenty 
and  two  years. 

And  he  had  thirty  sons  that  rode  on  thirty  ass  colts,  and  they 
had  thirty  cities,  which  are  called  Havoth-jair  unto  this  day,  which 
are  in  the  land  of  Gilead. 

*  -:>  #  * 

And  after  him  Ibzan  of  Bethlehem  judged  Israel. 
*15 


226  PROPOSAL  AND  ESPOUSAL. 

And  he  had  thirty  sons,  and  thirty  daughters,  whom  he  sent 
abroad,  and  took  in  thirty  daughters  from  abroad  for  his  sons.  And 
he  judged  Israel  seven  years. 


And  after  him  Abdon,  the  son  of  Killcl,  a  Pirathonite,  judge  of 
Israel. 

And  he  had  forty  sons  and  thirty  nephews,  that  rode  on  three 
score  and  ten  ass  colts  :  and  he  judged  Israel  eight  years. 

It  will,  therefore,  be  clearly  seen  that  to  decry  matrimony  is  to 
deny  posterity,  to  ignore  paternity,  and  to  despise  the  truest  and 
dearest  company  ;  for  even  a  small  family  may  prove  a  great  bless 
ing,  and  a  little  woman  be  a  large  treasure,  as  observes  the  some 
what  facetious,  but  decidedly  magnanimous  "  Rc~d  Burton,"  when 
he  thus  exclaims  : 

I'd  like  a  wife — a  little  wife  ; 

I  ask  no  stately  dame  ; 
No  regal  Juno's  lightning  glance 

Can  set  my  heart  aflame. 
Let  others  bend,  with  eager  gaze, 

At  haughty  beauties'  throne, 
But,  ah  !  it  is  a  fairy  queen 

Who  claims  me  as  her  own  ! 

A  dainty,  wee  and  winsome  thing, 

Like  her,  the  poet  sings  ; 
Who  seems  to  tread  this  grosser  earth 

Upborne  by  fairy  wings — 
WTho  walks,  and  talks,  and  sings,  and  smiles, 

In  such  a  witching  way, 
That  love  must  in  her  pathway  spring 

As  flowers  spring  in  May! 


ESPOUSAL.  227 

Ah  !  Nature  is  a  thrifty  dame, 

Who  will  economize  ; 
Her  precious  things  she  always  makes 

So  very  small  in  size. 
And  though  her  ruder  wealth  she  pours 

On  river,  sea  and  land, 
Her  perfect  works  are  miniatures, 

Wrought  finely  out  by  hand. 

The  little  bird,  as  all  can  vouch, 

Has  e'er  the  sweetest  song  ; 
To  little  flowers  in  the  shade 

The  sweetest  blooms  belong  ; 
The  little  gem  of  purest  ray 

Is  found  without  a  flaw— 
And  little  women  rule  the  world 

By  universal  law. 

And  yet  her  hands,  so  soft  and  white, 

Seem  only  made  to  cling  ; 
Her  little  fingers,  rosy-tipped, 

Seem  fettered  by  a  ring  ; 


But  trust  those  feet — those  little  feet — 

To  never  trip  or  fall ; 
And  trust  those  little  hands  for  help, 

If  help  can  come  at  all  ; 
And  trust  that  little  head  to  solve 

The  puzzling  things  of  life — 
For  biggest  heart,  and  mind,  and  soul. 

Go  trust — a  little  wife  ! 


PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 
A   SOUVENIR   OF    LOVE. 

Dearest,  sweetest,  fondest,  best, 
Lean  your  head  upon  my  breast  ; 
Loving  arms  shall  thee  entwine, 
Loving  hands  be  placed  in  mine  ; 
Throbbing  hearts  with  pleasure  beat, 
Happy  eyes  in  gladness  meet ; 
Peace  and  joy  now  reign  supreme, 
Love  our  all-absorbing  theme. 

Picture  of  a  living  love, 
True  as  angel-notes  above  ; 
Constant  as  the  Polar  star, 
Shining  in  the  heavens  afar  ; 
Deep  and  boundless  as  the  sea, 
Ever  pure  and  ever  free  ; 
Warm  and  bright  as  Southern  skies, 
Earthly  Eden — Paradise  ! 

Love  like  this  doth  ever  siner, 

o  * 

Echoes  wake  and  echoes  ring  ; 
Love  and  pain  may  sometimes  meet, 
Love  can  make  the  pain  a  sweet  ; 
Grief  and  care  shall  flee  away, 
Darkest  night  be  turned  to  day  ; 
Winter  snows  to  Summer  showers, 
Autumn  leaves  to  Spring's  fresh  flowers. 

Sordid  pleasures  have  their  day, 
Truth  and  Love  shall  ne'er  decay  ; 
Heaven  and  earth  their  blessing  give, 
Love  and  Truth  shall  ever  live  ; 


PROPOSAL.  229 


Then  let  love  our  bosoms  thrill, 
Empty  hearts  may  have  their  fill  ; 
The  poorest  may  be  rich  in  love, 
Bless'd  on  earth  and  crown'd  above  ! 


— Bonus  Aragus. 


WEDDED   ONENESS. 

"  Therefore  shall  a  man  leave  his  father  and  his  mothar,  and  shall 
cleave  unto  his  wife  :  and  they  shall  be  one  flesh." 

The  mutual  identity  and  relationship  of  the  primal  married  pair 
stand  clearly  revealed  in  three  striking  particulars.  First,  they 
were  made  of  the  same  living  substance — flesh  and  bone  : 

"  And  Adam  said,  This  is  now  bone  of  my  bones,  and  flesh  of 
my  flesh  :  she  shall  be  called  woman,  because  she  was  taken  out 
of  man." 

Second,  they  were  created  the  same  day.  God  created  them 
male  and  female,  and  called  their  name  Adam  in  the  same  day  that 
he  created  them.  Some  of  the  Rabbis  say  (and  what  is  it  they 
won't  say  ?)  that  Eve  was  not  created  till  Sunday  (or,  rather,  the 
Jewish  Sabbath).  "  But  let  God  be  true  and  every  man  a  liar." 

Thirdly,  they  were  called  by  the  same  name,  "Adam."  One 
name  stood  for  both.  Her  identity  was  lost  in  his.  He  called 
their  name  Adam  in  the  day  that  he  created  them.  Here,  then,  at 
the  very  beginning1,  we  have  the  origin  of  the  custom  of  the  woman 

J  o  o '  o 

taking  her  husband's  name.  Adam  himself  afterward  called  her 
Eve  (living),  significant  of  her  universal  motherhood,  or  "because 
she  was  the  mother  of  all  living."  Yet,  though  the  proper  name 
was  not  given  her  at  the  first,  the  common  noun  was  pronounced 
upon  her  at  sight,  as  it  were.  She  shall  be  called  Woman,  says  the 
enraptured  Adam,  because  she  was  taken  out  of  the  man, 

"  Rabbi  Joshua,  of  Saknin,  said  in  the  name  of  Rabbi  Levi  : 
'  The  Lord  considered  from  what  part  of  the  man  he  should  form 


230  PROPOSAL    AND    ESPOUSAL. 

woman  ;  not  from  the  head,  lest  she  should  be  proud;  not  from  the 
eyes,  lest  she  should  wish  to  see  everything  ;  not  from  the  mouth, 
lest  she  should  be  talkative  ;  nor  from  the  ear,  lest  she  should  wish 
to  hear  everything'  ;  nor  from  the  heart,  lest  she  should  be  jealous  ; 
nor  from  the  hand,  lest  she  should  wish  to  find  out  everything  ;  nor 
from  the  feet,  in  order  that  she  might  not  be  a  wanderer  ;  only 
from  the  most  hidden  place,  that  is  covered  even  when  a  man  is 
naked — namely,  the  rib.'"  —Talmud. 

Some  think  that  Adam  called  his  wife  Eve,  in  belief  that  God 
would  make  her  the  mother  not  only  of  all  mankind  in  common, 
but  of  the  promised  seed  in  particular,  by  whom  he  hoped  to  be 
raised  from  the  dead  to  immortal  life. 

So  Eva,  or  Hava/i,  may  be  interpreted  1'ira,  or  vivificatrix^  be 
cause  she  was  the  mother  of  all,  and  because  mankind,  when  sen 
tenced  to  death,  were  by  her  saved  alive. 

Hence,  when  the  first  child  was  born,  she  called  him,  jubilantly, 
Cain  (possession),  saying,  I  have  gotten  a  man  from  the  Lord  (no 
common  child,  this)  ;  but  she  soon  found  that  he  was  more  related, 
morally,  to  the  devil,  and  hence  in  her  chagrin  and  disappointment 
she  called  the  second  son  Abel  (vanity  or  breath,) 


THE    BEST    I 

Man's  other  helpers  come  and  go  ; 

But  this  of  God's  providing, 
Still  faithful  clings  through  weal  or  woe, 

For  evermore  abiding  :— 

His  help  in  sickness,  help  in  health  ; 

In  youthful  prime,  and  life's  declining  ; 
His  help  in  poverty  and  wealth, 

Man's  twin  life-light  forever  shining  : 


ESPOUSAL.  231 


His  help  to  counsel,  comfort,  cheer, 
Whate'er  may  overtake  him  ; 

His  help  to  wipe  away  the  tear, 
Though  all  mankind  forsake  him. 

Thou  fairer  Adam  ! — sweet  "Man-Ess!" 
Earth's  charm  ;  man's  consolation  ; 

Thy  genesis  was  but  to  bless, 
All  grace  in  thy  creation  ! 


WEDDED    LOVE. 

Hail !  wedded  love  !  mysterious  law  !  true  source 

Of  human  offspring  !  sole  propriety 

In  Paradise,  of  all  things  common  else! 

By  thee  adultrous  lust  was  driv'n  from  men, 

Among  the  bestial  herds  to  range  ;  by  thcc 

(Founded  in  reason,  loyal,  just  and  pure) 

Relations  dear,  and  all  the  charities 

Of  father,  son,  and  brother,  first  were  known. 

Perpetual  fountain  of  domestic  sweets  ! 

Whose  bed  is  undefil'd,  and  chaste  pronounc'd— 

Here  love  his  golden  shafts  employs  ;  here  lights 

His  constant  lamp,  and  waves  his  purple  wings  ; 

Reigns  here,  and  revels. — Milton. 


THE    MARRIAGE    BOAT. 


Oh  !  surely  marriage  is  a  great  and  sacred  responsibility.  It  is 
a  bark  in  which  two  souls  venture  out  on  life's  stormy  sea,  with  no 
aid  but  their  own  to  help  them  ;  the  well-doing  of  their  frail  vessel 
must  in  future  solely  rest  upon  themselves  ;  no  one  can  take  part 
either  to  mar  or  make  their  bliss  or  misery.  From  the  husband 


23?  PROPOSAL  AND   ESPOUSAL. 

alone  must  henceforth  flow  all  the  happiness  that  the  wife  is  des 
tined  to  know  ;  he  is  the  only  being  she  must  care  to  please  ;  all 
other  men  are  now  to  be  to  her  but  shadows  glancing  on  the  wall. 
And  he — what  is  his  share  in  the  compact  ?  How  does  he  fulfil  his 
promise — redeem  his  pledge  ?  For  does  he  not  swear  to  guard  and 
cherish,  and  look  leniently  on  the  faults  of  the  gentle  girl  he  takes 
to  his  heart  ;  and  in  return  for  all  her  duty  and  sweet  obedience,  be 
true  to  her  in  sickness  and  health,  in  wealth  and  in  poverty,  for 
ever  and  for  ever?  And  blessed  are  the  unions  in  which  those 
feelings  are  fostered  and  preserved. — Hamilton. 

Man  and  wife  are  equally  concerned  to  avoid  all  offence  of  each 
other  in  the  beginning  of  their  conversation.  Every  little  tiling  can 
blast  an  infant  blossom. — Jeremy  Taylor. 

If  you  would  have  the  nuptial  union  last, 

Let  virtue  be  the  bond  that  ties  it  fast. — Rcm. 


ADAMS    SLEEP — WAS    IT   A   TRANCE? 

And  the  Lord  God  caused  a  deep  sleep  to  fall  upon  Adam, 
and  he  slept  ;  and  he  took  one  of  the  ribs  and  closed  up  the  flesh 
instead  thereof."  The  deep  sleep  made  Adam  less  sensible  of  the 
pain  which  otherwise  he  would  have  felt  in  the  opening  of  his  side 
if  he  had  not  been  unconscious,  or  if  his  mind  had  not  been  wholly 
intent  upon  something  else,  as  it  was  in  this  sleep,  which  was  ac 
companied  with  an  ecstacy  (so  the  seventy  translate  this  word,  and 
it  is  agreeable  to  what  we  rend  in  Job  iv.  13) — in  thoughts  from  the 
visions  of  the  night,  when  deep  sleep  falleth  upon  man,  &c.  And  it 
i.s  thought  that  it  was  represented  to  Adam's  mind  both  what  was 
done  to  him  and  the  mystery  of  it,  as  appears  by  his  words  in  the 
23rd  and  24th  verses,  where  he  says,  "This  is  now  bone  of  my 
bone,"  &c. 


ESPOUSAL.  233 

THE  "SEVENTY"  CALL  IT  AN  ECSTACY. 

Mine  eyes  he  closed,  but  open  left  the  cell 

Of  fancy,  my  internal  sight,  by  which 

(Abstract  as  in  a  trance)  methought  I  saw 

Tho'  sleeping,  where  I  lay,  and  saw  the  shape 

Still  glorious,  before  whom  awake  I  stood— 

Under  his  forming  hands  a  creature  grew 

Man-like,  but  different  sex  ;  so  lovely  fair, 

That  what  seemed  fair  in  all  the  world,  seemed  now 

Mean,  or  in  her  summed  up,  in  her  contained, 

And  in  her  looks,  which  from  that  time  infused 

Sweetness  into  my  heart,  unfelt  before  ; 

And  into  all  things  from  her  air  inspired 

The  spirit  of  love  and  amorous  delight.  —  Milton, 


THE    NUMBER    OF    MAN'S    RIBS. 

"And  he  took  one  of  the  ribs,"  &c.  Thomas  BarthoUmus,  a 
famous  physician,  thinks  that  Adam  had  thirteen  ribs  on  each  side, 
and  that  God  took  away  one  pair,  with  the  muscular  parts  that  ad 
here  to  them,  and  out  of  them  made  Eve.  For  commonly  men 
have  but  twelve  ribs,  though  sometimes  there  have  been  found,  as 
Galen  and  Riolanus  testify,  those  who  have  had  thirteen,  and  very 
rarely  some  who  have  had  but  eleven.  Even  as  Bartholiim4S  him 
self  observed  in  a  lusty  strong  man  whom  he  dissected  in  the  year 
1657,  who  had  but  eleven  on  one  side,  and  a  small  appearance  of 
a  twelfth  on  the  other. 

"  And  the  rib  which  the  Lord  God  had  taken  from  man  made 
he  a  woman."  Eve  was  not  made  out  of  the  ground,  as  Adam  had 
been,  but  out  of  his  side,  that  he  might  breed  a  greater  love  between 
them  as  part  of  the  same  whole  ;  whereby  he  also  effectually  re. 


234  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

commended  marriage  to  all  mankind  as  founded  in  nature,  and  as 
the  re-union  of  man  and  \voman.  It  is  likewise  observable  that 
there  is  no  mention  made  of  his  breathing  a  soul  into  her  as  into 
him  ;  for  Moses  only  explains  what  was  peculiar  to  Eve,  which  was 
her  being  made  out  of  his  side,  the  rest  is  supposed  in  these  words  : 
"  I  will  make  a  help  meet  (fit)  for  him,"  which  the  vulgar  Latin 
rightly  translates,  simile  er,  like  unto  himself.  And  as  the  word 
anti  among  the  Greeks  denotes  likeness  and  similitude,  as  well  as 
contrary,  the  woman,  therefore  was  in  all  things  like  him  ;  only  he 
made  out  of  the  earth,  she  out  of  him,  that  he  might  cleave  unto 
her  with  the  clearest  love  and  affection.  It  is  also  intimated  (Gen. 
i.  27)  that  they  were  both  made  in  the  image  of  God,  which  effec 
tually  disposes  of  the  curious  and  silly  notion  of  the  Chinese,  that 
women  have  no  souls. 


SATAN    JUBILANT   OVER    THE    FALL. 

In  the  old  Greek  mysteries,  the  people  used  to  carry  about  a 
serpent,  and  were  instructed  to  cry  "  Eva,"  whereby  the  devil  seemed 
to  exult,  as  it  were,  over  the  unhappy  fall  of  our  first  mother. 

Philip  Melancthon  tells  a  story  to  this  purpose,  of  some  priests 
somewhere  in  Asia,  who  carry  about  with  them  a  serpent  in  a  bra 
zen  vessel,  and  as  they  attend  it  with  a  great  deal  of  music  and 
charms  in  verse,  the  serpent  lifts  up  itself,  opens  its  mouth,  and 
thrusts  out  the  head  of  a  beautiful  virgin  ;  the  devil  in  this  manner 
glorying  in  the  downfall  of  Eve  among  these  poor  idolaters.  And 
an  account  of  much  the  like  nature  is  given  us  in  books  of  travel  in 
the  West  Indies.  —  Nic/wl's  Conference. 

There  was  a  story  of  Adam  and  Eve,  of  the  tree  and  the  ser 
pent,  extant  among  the  Indians  long  ago,  and,  as  travellers  tell  us, 
is  still  preserved  among  the  inhabitants  of  Peru  and  among  the 
Brahmins. 


ESPOUSAL.  235 

A   BETTER   HALF   BRINGS    BETTER   QUARTERS. 

"  When  Dr.  Wendell  Holmes'  brother  John  was  advised  to  take 
a  wife  and  live  in  a  better  house,  he  said  he  presumed,  if  he  should 
get  a  better  half,  he  would  be  sure  of  better  quarters." 

"'I've  a  neat  little  cottage, 

It  stands  by  the  street  ; 
If  its  outside  is  humble, 

Its  inside  is  neat. 

I  love  my  sweet  Jinnie — 

She's  buxom  and  fair, 
And  sings  like  a  birdie 

To  welcome  me  there  ! 

I  mind  not  the  hardship, 

The  trouble  of  life, 
For  we  keep  up  the  courtship, 

Although  she's  my  wife." 


WEDDED    LOVE'S   DEVOTION. 

I  feel  my  spirit  humbled  when  you  call 

My  love  of  home  a  virtue  ;  'tis  the  part 

Yourself  have  play'd  has  fix'd  me  ;  for  the  heart 

Will  anchor  where  its  treasure  is  ;  and  small 

As  is  the  love  I  bear  you,  'tis  my  all— 

The  widow's  mite,  compared  with  your  desert : 

You  and  our  quiet  room,  then,  are  the  mart 

Of  all  my  thoughts  ;  'tis  there  they  rise  and  fall. 

The  parent  bird  that  in  its  wanderings 

O'er  hill  and  dale,  through  copse  and  leafy  spray, 


PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

Sees  nought  to  lure  his  constant  heart  away 
From  her  who  gravely  sits  with  furled  wings, 
Watching  their  mutual  charge  :  howe'er  he  roam, 
His  eye  still  fixes  on  his  mossy  home.  —  Clarke. 


WEDDED    LOVE'S    TRUE    HARMONY. 

Hail,  holy  love,  thou  word  that  sums  all  bliss, 

Gives  and  receives  all  bliss,  fullest  when  most 

Thou  givest  !  spring-head  of  ail  felicity, 

Deepest  when  most  is  drawn  !  emblem  of  God  ! 

Mysterious,  infinite,  exhaustless  love  ! 

On  earth  mysterious,  and  mysterious  still 

In  Heaven  !  sweet  chord  that  harmonizes  all 

The  harps  of  Paradise  ! 

Mail,  love  !  first  love,  thou  word  that  sums  all  bliss! 

The  sparkling  cream  of  all  time's  blessedness 

The  silken  down  of  happiness  complete  ! 

Discerner  of  the  riper  grapes  of  joy, 

She  gathercth,  and  selecteth  with  her  hand, 

All  finest  relishes,  all  fairest  sights, 

All  rarest  odours,  all  divinest  sounds, 

All  thoughts,  all  feelings  dearest  to  the  soul  ; 

And  brings  the  holy  m:::ture  home,  and  fills 

The  heart  with  all  superlatives  of  bliss. 

—  Polio/:. 


Behold  Eve  coming  forth, 
Made  to  double  Adam's  worth — 

Completing  nature's  animated  plan  ; 
For  we  find  in  all  the  past, 
Ere  the  fairest  thing,  the  last, 

And  "woman  is  the  glory  of  the  man." 


PROPOSAL.  237 

THE    BRIDE. 


She  standcth  blushing  by  his  side, 
Fairest  of  earth-born  creatures  ; 

The  lily's  bloom  and  rose's  pride, 
Well-wedded  in  her  features  : 

Love's  pilgrim  with  a  backward  sigh, 
Going  out — no  more  returning  : — 

A  newer  star  illumes  the  sky, 
A  brighter  sun  is  burning. 

Two  living  streams  converging  flow, 
With  current  nought  can  sever  ; 

The  confluent  waves  no  refluence  know, 
What  God  doeth  is  forever. 

The  stronger  with  the  gentler  glides, 

The  grosser  with  the  finer  ; 
As  Harmony  her  numbers  guides, — 

The  major  with  the  minor. 

And  what  with  her  shall  we  compare, 
In  this,  life's  grand  transition  ; 

What  symbol,  object,  emblem  fair, 
Shall  furnish  Type's  provision  ? 

Like  startled,  shy,  spray-swinging  bird, 
With  balanced  wing  a-quiver  ; 

That  sees  the  grass  beneath  her  stirred, 
Beside  the  bending  river  : 

She  hangs  uncertain  poised  for  flight 
Yet  doubting  the  occasion  ; 

Like  wav'rer  undecided,  quite, 
'Twixt  warning  and  persuasion  : 


238  PROPOSAL   AND    ESPOUSAL. 

Like  timid  deer,  in  distant  dell. 

Descrying  object  moving ; 
S'ime  shadowy  form  it  knows  not  well, 

Through  woodland  twilight  roving  : 

She  gazing,  starts,  and  starting,  turns  ; 

Then  turns  again  and  pauses  ; 
Her  eager  spirit  trembles,  burns 

To  find  out  what  the  cause  is  : 

Like  ship  descending  down  the  "slips," 
Gay-decked  for  trial  motion — 

Going  trembling  forward  as  she  dips, 
To  embrace  the  buoyant  ocean. 

As  conscious  when  she  wooes  the  wave, 
And  walks  the  tidal   water, 

The  deep  must  be  her  home  or  grave  ; 
Fair  Neptune's  bannered  daughter  : 

In  such  suspense  the  maiden  stands, 
Twixt  love  and  home  endearment  ; 

For  none  e'er  felt  love's  golden  bands, 
But  knew  what  wholesome  fear  meant 

Solicitous,  yet  anxious,  she, 
To  prove  untried  relations  ; 

Like  traveller  'lured  by  minstrelsy, 
Of  foreign  celebrations  : 

Some  fragments  of  the  strain  he  knows, 
But  not  the  complete  measure  ; 

And  longs  the  burden  to  unclose, 
Of  song's  unfolding  treasure. 

Oh,  stronger  is  elective  love, 

Than  love  of  sister,  sire  ; 
And  they  who  feel  its  ardor  prove, 

The  coals  are  coals  of  fire. 


-&& 


MARRIAGES    IN    STRANGE    PLACES. 


HfclMflARRIAGS  have  oftentimes  been   celebrated   in   curious 

^^PiBUfjhk 

••'•iliX^l^     places,  for  the  sake  of  novelty,  or   notoriety,   or   both. 

;^%%^       In   passing   through    the  Mammoth    Cave,   the  guide 

£Siv<      points   out  a   place,   near  what   is  called  the  "  Gothic 

OOW  Q 

'2©C  Pulpit"  (a  remarkable  formation  of  stalagmite,  closely 
resembling  an  old-fashioned  "desk,"  as  the  pulpit  is 
called  in  America),  where  a  young  belle  of  Southern  climes  was 
wedded  to  the  object  of  her  choice,  against  the  express  wishes  of 
her  dying  aunt,  whom  she  had  promised  that  she  never  would 
marry  "any  man  on  the  face  of  the  earth."  So  the  ingenious  and 
prevaricating  maiden  took  her  affianced  below  the  earth  to  marry 
him,  and  thus  kept  her  word  and  got  a  husband,  too. 

Others  have  been  married  in  balloons,  and  have  gone  up  as  high 
above  the  earth  as  the  aforesaid  party  did  below  it. 

But  a  better  and  more  sensible  wedding,  and  scarcely  less 
unique,  was  celebrated  by  a  minister  of  the  gospel,  who  has  now 
gone  to  his  reward. 

"  It  is  said  of  the  beloved  Summerfield,  that  on  one  occasion, 
before  a  large  audience,  he  announced  a  marriage  ceremony  about 
to  be  performed.  The  excited  assembly,  in  almost  breathless  sus 
pense,  waited  the  introduction  of  the  parties  concerned,  when  the 
devoted  one  announced  himself  as  one  of  the  parties,  and  observed, 
in  a  manner  solemn  as  eternity,  that  he  was  now  about  to  be  united 
in  marriage  covenant.  He  then,  with  a  solemnity  never  to  be  for- 

239 


240  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

gotten,  brought  himself  under  the  bonds  of  allegiance  to   Christ— 
to  take  him  as  the  bridegroom  of  his  soul   and   supreme   object  of 
his  heart's  adoration  ;  and  to   have   all   his   interests  for  time  and 
eternity  in  prominent,  entire  and  perpetual  oneness  with  Christ. 

'You  may  say,  I  am  fearful  of  thus  solemnly  engaging  myself, 
lest,  in  an  unguarded  moment,  I  may  violate  my  pledge — and  is  it 
not  better  to  remain  unpledged,  than  to  vow  and  not  perform?  Can 
you  conceive  yourself  so  won  with  the  loveliness  of  a  fellow-being 
as  to  venture  in  marriage  covenant  without  fearful  forebodings  of 
inconstancy?  Were  I,  on  this  principle,  to  dissuade  you  from  en 
tering  into  the  solemnities  of  the  marriage  .contract  with  one  worthy 
of  your  love,  would  you  not  reproachfully  repel  the  suggestion  with 
the  persuasion  that  I  had  but  little  knowledge  of  the  strength  of 
your  affection,  or  the  exceeding  amiability  of  your  friend  ?  Would 
you  not  rather  contemplate  the  blessedness  of  an  enduring  relation 
ship,  in  confident  expectation  that  a  riper  knowledge  would  but 
heighten  your  estimation,  and  increase  the  ardor  of  your  love  ? 

And  now  can  you  not,  in  expectation  of  corresponding  results, 
contemplate  an  ever-enduring  union  with  the  Altogether  Lovely  ? 

If  you  ever  thus  take  Christ  as  the  bridegroom  of  your  soul,  the 
decisive  hour  must  arrive  for  the  consummation  of  that  union.  It 
has  only  been  delayed  for  want  of  an  entire  aquiescence  on  your 
part  The  heavenly  bridegroom  even  now  is  waiting  with  glorious 
attendants  from  the  uppper  world  to  hear  your  decision,  to  witness 
the  consummation,  and  to  ratify  and  record  on  the  pages  of  eter 
nity  the  infinitely  responsible  act.  He  now  presents  the  terms  of 
the  covenant,  and  invites  you  in  his  strength  to  lay  hold  upon  it. 
Will  you  keep  him  longer  waiting,  and  subject  yourself  to  the  fear 
ful  probability  of  his  taking  a  returnlcss  departure,  or  will  you  sig 
nalize  this  eventful,  solemn  hour  on  the  annals  of  eternity,  as  the 
specific  period  when  you  subscribed  your  name  to  a  covenant  which 


ESPOUSAL.  24! 

brought  you  under  obligations  never  to  be  annulled,  of  a  perpetual 
surrender  of  your  being  to  him  ? 

O  happy  day,  that  fixed  my  choice 
On  thec,  my  Saviour  and  my  God  ! 

Well  may  this  glowing  heart  rejoice, 
And  tell  its  raptures  all  abroad.'  " 


MARRIED    ON     HORSEBACK. 

"  A  romantic  marriage  occurred  last  Monday  night,  about  eight 
o'clock,  in  front  of  the  residence  of  Justice  McCann,  on  Green  St., 
Louisville.  George  A.  Elkins  and  Mollic  Stewart,  a  runaway  couple 
hailing  from  Henry  County,  Ky.,  shouted  a  loud  hello  several  times 
to  attract  the  attention  of  the  magistrate,  who  came  out  to  the 
street  with  a  lantern,  and  asked  what  was  the  matter. 

The  young  gentleman  and  lady  were  seated  on  the  same  horse, 
and  were  drenched  with  the  rain  which  had  been  falling  for  several 
hours.  Elkins  said  they  wanted  to  be  married  at  once,  and  that 
the  ceremony  would  have  to  be  hurried,  as  the  father  and  brothers 
of  the  young  lady  were  in  pursuit  of  them. 

The  Justice  asked  the  couple  to  shew  their  license,  which  was 
done,  and  then  invited  them  into  the  house,  where  the  ceremony 
could  be  performed.  This  the  couple  refused  to  do,  on  the  ground 
of  not  having  sufficient  time,  and  asked,  instead  to  be  married  then 
and  there  on  horseback. 

The  'Squire  consented  after  some  hesitation,  and  called  to  Col. 
Hardin,  who  happened  to  be  passing  at  the  time,  to  hold  an  um 
brella  over  the  head  of  the  two  while  the  service  could  be  performed. 
The  ceremony  was  brief,  and  at  the  conclusion  the  groom  remun 
erated  the  'Squire  with  a  liberal  sum,  when  the  couple  rode  away. 
The  bride  was  young,  very  pretty,  while  the  husband  looked  like  a 

prosperous  and  well-to-do  young  farmer." 
16* 


MARRIAGE    CUSTOMS. 


URIDKMEN,    OK    "THE    CHILDREN    OE    THE    BRIDECIIAMBER." 


IIKX  came  to  him  the  disciples  of  John,  saying,  Why  do 
we  and  the  Pharisees  fast  oft,  but  thy  disciples  fast  not  ? 

-  *y  \\ 

And  Jesus  said  unto  them,  Can  the  children  of  the 
bridechambcr  mourn  as  long  as  the  bridegroom  is  with 
them  ?  but  the  days  will  come  when    the   bridegroom  shall 
be    taken    from    them,    and    then    shall    they    fast.  —  New 
Testament. 

The  children  of  the  bridechambcr  were  the  "bridemen,"  the 
young  men  who  used  to  be  attendants  at  marriages  on  the  bride 
groom.  Their  attendance  continued  seven  days,  during  which  time 
they  were  exempted  from  attending  to  the  stated  times  of  prayer, 
the  use  of  phylacteries,  the  dwelling  in  booths,  if  at  the  time  of  the 
Feast  of  the  Tabernacle,  and  from  the  occasions  of  fasting.  The 
Pharisees  themselves  sanctioned  these  regulations. 

It  would  be  unreasonable  for  the  companions  of  a  bridegroom 
to  fast  during  the  days  allotted  to  his  nuptials,  which  were  usually 
spent  in  feasting  ;  but  if  any  calamity  tore  him  from  them,  their 
joy  would  be  turned  to  mourning,  and  their  feasting  into  fasting. 
In  like  manner,  it  would  be  improper  for  his  disciples  to  fast  while 
they  had  the  comfort  of  his  presence  ;  but  he  would  soon  be  taken 

242 


ESPOUSAL.  243 

from  them,  and  then  they  would  meet  with  hardships  and  trials, 
which  would  make  fasting  seasonable.  —  Pictorial  and  Explanatory 
New  Testament. 


THE    WEDDING   GARMENT. 

And  when  the  king  came  in  to  see  the  guests,  he  saw  there  a 
man  which  had  not  on  a  wedding  garment. 

And  he  saith  unto  him,  Friend,  how  earnest  thou  in  hither,  not 
having  a  wedding  garment?  And  he  was  speechless. 

Then  said  the  king  to  the  servants,  Bind  him  hand  and  foot, 
and  take  him  away,  and  cast  him  into  outer  darkness  ;  there  shall 
be  weeping  and  gnashing  of  teeth. 

For  many  are  called,  but  few  are  chosen.  —  New  Testament. 

~^®x  -  ,6.  -  ,.  --  g.  -  ^^^ 

In  the  East,  everyone  that  came  to  a  marriage-teast  was  ex 
pected  to  appear  in  a  handsome  and  elegant  dress,  which  was  called 
"  the  wedding  garment."  This  was  frequently  a  white  robe.  When 
the  guest  was  a  stranger,  or  was  not  able  to  provide  such  a  robe,  it 
was  usual  for  the  master  of  the  feast  to  furnish  him  with  one  ;  and 
if  he  who  gave  the  entertainment  was  of  high  rank  and  opulence,  he 
sometimes  provided  marriage  robes  for  the  whole  assembly.  To 
this  custom  we  have  allusion  in  Homer,  and  other  classic  writers, 
and  there  are  some  traces  of  it  in  the  entertainments  of  the  Turkish 
court  at  this  very  day.  It  must  be  remarked,  also,  that  it  was  in  a 
very  high  degree  indecorous  and  offensive  to  good  manners  to  in 
trude  into  the  festivity  without  this  garment. 

It  is  well  known  that  banquets  were  generally  celebrated  in 
rooms  that  were  finely  illuminated  and  richly  ordered.  And  con 
sidering  how  splendid  and  magnificent  the  entertainments  of  the 
Eastern  princes  were,  it  cannot  be  thought  an  unnatural  circumstance 


-44  'PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

that  such  an  affront  as  this  offered  to  the  king,  his  son,  his  bride, 
and  the  rest  of  the  company,  should  be  punished  with  bonds  and  a 
dungeon.  —  Pictorial  and  Explanatory  New  Testament. 

Every  guest  invited  to  the  wedding,  at  the  royal  marriage  of 
Sultan  Mahmoud,  a  few  years  ago,  had  made  expressly  for  him  at 
the  expense  of  the  Sultan  a  wedding  garment.  No  one,  however 
dignified  by  his  station,  was  permitted  to  enter  into  the  presence- 
chamber  of  that  sovereign  without  a  change  of  raiment. 

The  dungeons  were  not  far  from  the  banqueting  room,  but  deep 
down,  below  the  very  foundations,  in  the  bowels  of  the  earth,  and 
suggestive  of  Joan's  dreadful  hyperbole,  "the  belly  of  hell." 


The  wedding  garment  was  of  another  fashion  than  all  the  rest  ; 
therefore,  if  thou  fashionest  thyself  like  all  the  rest,  thou  has  not  on 
the  wedding  garment,  for  this  was  nothing  like  unto  the  rest. 
Christ's  garment  was  of  another  manner  of  fashion,  differing  from 
the  rest  of  the  world  ;  so  thy  life  must  be  of  another  fashion  than 
the  world,  or  else,  as  the  fashion  of  the  world  passcth  away,  so  thou 
shalt  pass  and  perish  with  it.  God  cloth  not  like  the  fashion  of 
the  world.  Then  you  must  not  make  religion 

but  a  table  talk,  for  this  is  the  fashion  of  the  world  ;  then  you  must 
not  turn  with  the  time,  for  this  is  the  fashion  of  the  world  ;  then 
you  must  not  defer  to  do  good  till  you  die,  for  this  is  the  fashion  of 
the  world.  The  world  is  a  bad  pattern  to  follow,  because,  as  the 
flesh  followeth  the  devil,  so  the  world  followcth  the  flesh.  There 
fore,  say  no  more,  "  we  must  do  as  the  world  doth,"  but  say,  "  we 
must  not  do  as  the  world  doth."  You  say,  you  go  so  because  it  is 
the  fashion  ;  God  saith.  "  go  not  so  because  it  is  the  fashion."  If 
you  come  but  in  the  fashion,  you  shall  be  in  the  abuse.  There  is 
no  man  that  weareth  the  cutter's  fashion,  but  he  is  a  cutter  ;  none 
which  cuttcth  his  hair  like  them  which  arc  proud,  but  he  is  proud  ; 


ESPOUSAL.  245 

none  that  coloreth  her  face  like  them  which  are  wanton,  but  she  is 
wanton  ;  none  which  sweareth  like  them  which  lie,  but  he  will  lie 
as  well  as  swear.  Therefore,  make  not  your  life  of  the  world's 
fashion. 

He  which  biddeth  us  refrain  from  every  show  of  evil  would  have 
us  refrain  from  the  show  of  idolatry  and  the  show  of  heresy,  for 
these  are  the  greatest  evils.  But  if  we  be  not  idolatrous,  yet  have 
we  the  show  of  idolatry  ;  if  we  be  not  of  Anti-Christ's  religion,  yet 
we  be  of  Antichrist's  fashion  so  long  as  we  show  forth  the  same 
badge  and  cognizance:  you  know  what  I  mean.  This  is  to  jump 
with  the  world,  and  leap  to  hell.  This  is  not  to  be  in  fashion,  but 
out  of  fashion.  Therefore  hear  ye  now  the  best  fashion. 

*  *  >',-  #  #  *  # 

The  way  is  like  a  thicket,  and  the  door  like  a  needle's  eye, 
therefore  it  is  impossible  for  you  to  come  thither.  But  when  you 
send  Faith,  Hope  and  Love,  those  messenger  of  peace  and  truth, 
they  will  bring  you  word,  saying  your  ruffs  must  be  ruffled,  and 
your  fardingales  (crinolines)  crushed,  pride  must  be  put  off,  and 
other  sins  ;  and  none  shall  be  kept  out  of  heaven  but  such  as  will 
take  their  sins  with  them,  for  they  be  unbeseeming  the  country. 
So  that  ere  we  come  thither  we  must  leave  them,  like  the  shadow 
when  we  go  in  at  the  door,  and  we  must  shake  hands  with  them, 
and  bid  them  farewell. — Henry  SuntJi,  (i6jo). 


aH^^ 


ECCENTRIC    BRIDEGROOMS. 


SOME     SPICY     ANECDOTES     RELATING     TO    WEDDINGS,     MISHAPS 
TO     MINISTERS,    ETC. 


HERE   was  a  clergyman  who  married  a  couple,  and   at 
•••V;W&>      the   wedding  breakfast   one    of   the   bridesmaids   ex 
pressed  a  wish  to  sec  that  mystic  document,  a  wedding 
license,    which  she   had    never  beheld  in  her   lifetime. 
The    request    occasioned    a    fearful    discovery.      The 
clergyman  had  quite  forgotten  to  ask   for  the   license  ;  the  bride 
groom  had  left  it  to  the  '  best  man  '  to  procure  it,  and  this  the  man 
had  forgotten  to  do.       Of  course  the  marriage  was  no  marriage  at 
all.     The  wedding  party  broke  up   in   dismay,  and   the   ceremony 
was  performed  again   next   day.       The  poor   clergyman,  however, 
never  got  over  the  effects  of  his  blunder." 

"On  another  occasion,  a  clergyman  got  himself  into  consider 
able  trouble.  He  was  of  the  type  known  as  Ritualistic,  and  per 
suaded  a  worthy  couple,  who  had  been  married  at  a  non-Conformist 
chapel,  that  they  had  not  been  ecclesiastically  married  at  all,  and 
that  it  was  necessary  that  they  should  be  married  over  again  at  the 
parish  church.  This  was  very  much  resented  by  the  non-Conformist 

interest,  and  the  clergyman  was  put  upon  his   trial  at  the   Oxford 

246 


ESPOUSAL.  247 


assizes.  The  judge  took  a  very  lenient  view,  and  said  that,  as  the 
parties  had  already  been  legally  married,  further  service  was 
illusory,  and  that  he  might  just  as  well  have  read  'Chevy  Chase' 
over  them." 


"  In  one  of  his  novels,  Charles  Rcacle  makes  his  hero,  a  clergy 
man,  wonder  whether  he  might  not  legally  marry  himself  to  the 
heroine,  especially  as  they  were  both  cast  upon  a  desolate  island. 
It  may  be  well  that  novelists  and  novel  readers  should  be  aware 
that  for  a  clergyman  to  officiate  at  his  own  marriage  is  utterly 
illegal." 


"  One  day  an  elderly  gentleman  met  a  young  one.  'I  have 
had  a  hard  day's  work,'  said  the  young  Levite.  '  I  began  at  seven 
o'clock  this  morning  by  marrying  a  couple.'  (  Allow  me  to  inform 
you/  said  his  senior,  '  that  a  marriage  at  that  time  of  clay,  according 
to  English  law,  is  no  marriage  at  all.  Moreover,  to  the  best  of  my 
belief,  you  have  made  yourself  liable  to  seven  years'  penal  servitude. 
Between  eight  and  twelve  is  the  prescribed  time.  You  had  better 
go  back  as  soon  as  you  can  and  marry  them  over  again.'  ' 


•  O'O-OO'O'O- 


"  I  have  known  brides,  v/hen  the  grooms  have  failed  to  make 
the  proper  responses,  to  prompt  them  immediately,  with  the  great 
est  facility.  As  for  the  men,  they  commit  all  kinds  of  blunders 
and  bunglings.  I  have  known  a  man,  at  that  very  trying  and  nerv 
ous  moment,  follow  the  clergyman  within  the  communion  rail,  and 
prepare  to  take  a  place  opposite  him.  I  have  known  a  man,  when 
the  minister  stretched  out  his  hand  to  unite  those  of  the  couple, 
take  it  vigorously  in  his  own,  and  give  it  a  hearty  shake.  Some 
ladies  have  an  almost  unconquerable  reluctance  to  use  the  word 
'  obey  •'  one  or  two,  if  their  own  statements  are  to  be  accepted,  have 
ingeniously  constructed  the  word  '  nobey.'  The  word,  however,  has 


PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

formally  to  be  admitted  into  the  language.  There  was  one  girl, 
who  was  being  married  by  a  very  kind  old  clergyman,  who  abso 
lutely  refused  to  utter  the  word  '  obey.'  The  minister  suggested, 
that  if  she  was  unwilling  to  utter  the  word  aloud,  she  should  whis 
per  it  to  him,  but  the  young  lady  refused  even  this  kind  of  a  com 
promise.  Further,  however,  than  this  the  clergyman  refused  to 
accommodate  her  ;  but  when  he  was  forced  to  dismiss  them  all 
without  proceeding  any  further,  the  recalcitrant  young  person  con 
sented  to  '  obe.'  " 


"The  difficult}-,  however,  is  not  always  made  on  the  side  of  the 
lady.  On  one  occasion  the  bridegroom  wished  to  deliver  a  little 
oration,  qualifying  his  vow,  and  describing  in  what  sense  and  to 
what  extent  he  was  using  the  words  of  the  formula.  He  was,  of 
course,  given  to  understand  that  nothing  of  this  kind  could  be  per 
mitted.  There  was  one  man  who  accompanied  the  formula  with 
sotto  voce  remarks,  which  must  have  been  exceedingly  disagreeable 
to  the  officiating  minister.  He  interpolated  remarks  after  the 
fashion  of  Hurchell's  '  Fudge.'  '  With  this  ring  I  thec  wed  ;  that's 
superstition.'  '  With  my  body  I  thce  worship  ;  that's  idolatry.' 
'With  all  my  worldly  goods  I  thce  endow;  that's  a  lie.'  It  is  a 
wonder  that  such  a  being  was  not  conducted  out  of  church  by  the 
beadle." 

—  ~*2)(2S~— 

"This  puts  me  in  mind  of  an  anecdote  that  is  told  ot  a  man, 
who  in  his  time  was  a  Cabinet  Minister.  There  was  a  great  dis 
cussion  on  the  question  whether  a  man  can  marry  on  ^"300  a  year. 
'  All  I  can  say/  said  the  great  man,  'is  that  when  I  said,  With  all 
my  worldly  goods  1  thce  endow,  so  far  from  having  £300,  I  ques 
tion  whether,  when  all  my  debts  were  paid,  I  had  300  pence.'  'Yes, 
my  love,'  said  his  wife,  '  but  you  had  your  splendid  intellect.'  '  I 
didn't  endow  you  with  that,  ma'am,'  sharply  retorted  the  right  hon 
orable  husband." 


ESPOUSAL.  249 

! Sweet  girl  !  you  know  three  hundred  pounds 

Would  prove  a  slender  axis 
For  household  wheels  to  run  their  rounds 

In  yearly  rent  and  taxes. 
You  see,  dear,  that  our  home  must  be 

Out  West,  about  the  squares, 
With  good  reception  rooms — full  three — 

And  servants'  flights  of  stairs. 
You  must  have  '  soirees '  now  and  then 

(Though  I  can't  see  their  use), 
And  I  must  often  have  some  men 

To  dinner — ( a  la  Russe. 
I've  asked  my  uncle  for  his  aid, 

Of  course,  he  won't  accord  it  ; 
And  so  our  bliss  must  be  delayed, 

For  means,  love,  won't  afford  it." 


"  The  following  case  was  related  to  me  by  a  Bishop  of  the 
Church  of  England  :  There  was  a  man  who  officiated  as  a  clergy 
man  in  a  large  town  for  about  fifteen  years.  At  the  lapse  of  that 
time  it  was  accidentally  discovered  that  he  was  an  impostor,  A 
bishop  came,  or  the  man  went  into  a  new  diocese  ;  anyhow,  the 
request  came  that  he  would  produce  his  letters  of  orders.  Letters 
of  orders  are  precious  and  remarkable  documents  ;  if  once  lost  they 
cannot  be  replaced.  The  pseudo  clergyman  replied,  expressing  his 
regret,  that  in  the  course  of  removal  the  letters  had  been  hopelessly 
mislaid,  but  hoped  that  the  length  of  time  in  which  he  had  served 
>n  the  diocese  would  be  a  sufficient  voucher.  The  Bishop  wrote 
back  to  say  that  he  regretted  the  loss  of  the  letters  of  orders,  and 
that  it  would  be  quite  sufficient  if  he  gave  exact  dates,  which  would 
enable  him  to  refer  to  the  diocese  registry.  The  imposture  then 
became  known.  It  was  a  matter  of  great  anxiety  to  settle  what 


250  PROPOSAL   AND    ESPOUSAL. 

had  best  be  clone  under  such  circumstances.  Of  course,  a  very 
large  number  of  marriages  had  been  performed  during  these  fifteen 
years,  not  one  of  which  was  legal.  The  first  suggestion  was  that 
an  act  should  be  passed  making  these  marriages  legal.  There  was 
objections  to  this  course.  It  was  considered  that  an  immense  deal  of 
pain  would  be  caused  by  the  publication  of  the  invalidity  of  these 
marriages,  and  that  peculiar  hardships  would  be  done  in  the  case  of 
children  where  one  or  both  parents  had  died  in  the  meantime.  On 
a  certain  evening  there  was  a  solemn  discussion  between  the  Bishop 
cf  the  diocese  and  the  Home  Secretary,  the  result  of  which  was  a 
communication  to  the  false  clergyman,  that  if  he  left  England  im 
mediately,  and  forever,  proceedings  woul'1  not  be  taken,  but  that 
otherwise  he  would  be  prosecuted." 


•oo»o«o- 


"  At  a  negro  wedding,  when  the  minister  read  the  words,  '  love, 
honor  and  obey,'  the  groom  interrupted  him,  and  said  :  '  Read  that 
agin,  sah  ;  read  it  once  mo',  so's  de  lacly  kin  ketch  de  full  solemnity 
of  de  meaning.  I  se  been  married  befo'." 


A    VERY    ECCENTRIC    MARRIAGE. 

Here  is  an  extract  from  a  newspaper  ot  181  1  :  —  "  Last  week,  in 
Hertfordshire,  John  Freeman,  a  chimney-sweeper,  to  Miss  Priscilla 
Thackthwaite,  with  a  fortune  of  £4,000.  Miss  Thackthwaite  was 
a  very  eccentric  character,  and  on  her  coming  of  age,  declared  that 
she  would  be  married  either  to  a  soldier,  a  sailor,  a  cobbler  or  a 
chimney-sweeper.  In  consequence  of  this  declaration,  Peter  Nor 
man,  a  soldier  ;  Henry  Dalton,  a  sailor  ;  James  Hunt,  a  cobbler, 
and  John  Freeman,  a  chimney-sweeper,  respectively  paid  their  ad 
dresses  to  this  fair  female,  and  exerted  all  their  abilities  to  win  her 
heart.  After  a  minute's  deliberation  on  the  merits  of  the  different 
suitors,  she  gave  the  preference  to  the  member  of  the  sooty  tribe." 
English  Exchange. 


ESPOUSAL.  251 

CREELING    THE    BRIDEGROOM. 

A  Scottish  custom  of  "  Auld  Lang  Syne,"  in  connection  with 
marriage,  was  as  follows  : — Early  in  the  day  after  the  marriage 
those  interested  in  the  proceedings  assembled  at  the  home  of  the 
new-married  couple,  bringing  with  them  a  "  creel "  or  basket,  which 
they  filled  with  stones.  The  young  husband,  on  being  brought  to 
the  door,  had  the  creel  firmly  fixed  to  his  back,  and  with  it  in  this 
position  had  to  run  the  round  of  the  town,  or  at  least  the  chief 
portion  of  it,  followed  by  a  number  of  men  to  see  that  he  did  not 
drop  his  burden,  the  only  condition  on  which  he  was  allowed  to  do 
so  being  that  his  wife  should  come  after  him  and  kiss  him.  As  re 
lief  depended  altogether  on  the  wife,  it  would  sometimes  happen 
that  the  husband  did  not  need  to  run  more  than  a  few  yards  ;  but 
when  she  was  more  than  ordinarily  bashful,  or  wished  to  have  a 
little  sport  at  the  expense  of  her  lord  and  master — which  it  may  be 
supposed  would  not  infrequently  be  the  case — he  had  to  carry  his 
load  a  considerable  distance.  This  custom  was  very  strictly  en 
forced,  for  the  person  who  was  last  creeled  had  charge  of  the  cere 
mony,  and  he  was  naturally  anxious  that  no  one  should  escape. 
It  would  seem  that  this  practice  came  to  an  end  about  sixty  years 
ago,  in  the  person  of  one  Robert  Young,  who,  on  the  ostensible 
plea  of  a  sore  back,  lay  abed  all  the  day  after  his  marriage,  and 
obstinately  refused  to  get  up  and  be  creeled.  He  had  been  thrice 
married  before,  and  no  doubt  felt  he  had  enough  of  creeling. 


"  A  couple  were  married  at  a  fair,  for  a  prize,  recently,  at  Onon- 
daga,  N.  Y.  A  local  journal  says  :  'In  response  to  the  offer  of  a 
prize,  a  couple  mounted  a  high  platform,  and  were  married  in  the 
presence  of  assembled  and  hurrahing  thousands.  Cheering  and 
laughable  exclamations  broke  out  at  the  various  points  in  the  cere 
mony,  embarrassing  the  minister  very  much.  Finally  it  was  over, 


252  PROPOSAL  AND  ESPOUSAL. 

and  the  fair  bride  was  kissed  by  the  groom,  and  six  groomsmen, 
fourteen  reporters,  and  more  than  twenty-five  men  who  had  taken 
prizes.'  It  was  an  incongruous  beginning  to  the  serious  duties  of 
married  life — the  climax,  so  far  as  we  have  reached  yet,  to  the  ten 
dency  to  regard  the  entrance  upon  the  solemn  obligations  of  matri 
mony  as  a  joke.  The  same  journal  suggests,  with  grim  pleasantry, 
that  next  year  the  managers  of  the  fair  should  vary  the  programme 
by  offering  a  prize  to  any  one  who  will  die  on  the  grounds.  That 
would  be  a  matter  still  further  removed  from  the  sphere  of  joking 
but  the  carelessness  commonly  displayed  in  rightly  preparing  for 
that  momentous  event,  which  lies  before  every  one,  proves  that  the 
gravity  of  that  also  is  not  generally  realized  (Ps.  xxxix.  4)." 


"  A  romantic  marriage  took  place  in  Brooklyn,  N.  Y.,  a  short 
time  ago.  In  the  summer  of  1885,  a  wealthy  widow  lady  residing 
in  Brooklyn  died,  and  left  an  eccentric  will.  She  bequeathed  the 
whole  of  her  property,  valued  at  $80,000,  in  trust  to  her  young 
companion,  a  charming  French  lady,  who  some  years  before  had 
answered  her  advertisement  for  a  reader  and  pianist.  The  young 
lady  was  enjoined  to  search  for  the  testator's  only  son,  who  ran 
away  from  home  in  1871.  It  was  the  widow's  wish  that  if  the  son 
could  be  found  he  and  the  young  French  lady  should  marry,  and 
divide  her  estate  equally.  If  either  of  the  two  refused  to  marry, 
the  party  refusing  was  to  have  one-fourth  of  the  estate,  and  the 
other  party  the  remaining  three-fourths.  The  search  for  the  runa 
way,  which  the  widow  had  prosecuted  without  success,  was  resumed, 
and  this  summer  he  was  discovered  in  Mexico.  He  returned  to 
Brooklyn  six  weeks  ago,  but  the  nature  of  his  mother's  will  was 
concealed  from  him.  The  lawyer,  however,  introduced  him  to  the 
French  lady,  who  was  a  total  stranger  to  him.  They  became  at 
tached  to  each  other,  and  before  the  young  man  was  informed  of 
his  mother's  arrangement,  he  asked  her  to  marry  him.  Then  he 


ESPOUSAL.  253 

learned  that  he  was  unconsciously  fulfilling  his  mother's  wishes. 
As  he  was  an  undutiful  son,  it  is  possible  that  unconscious  obedi 
ence  was  the  only  kind  of  obedience  he  would  render.  God  has 
often  made  use  of  ungodly  men  as  instruments  to  carry  out  His 
purposes.  They  do  His  will  while  they  imagine  they  arc  following 
their  own  volition  (Isa.  x.  6-7)." 


A    METHODIST     MINISTER'S    MATRIMONIAL    METHOD. 

About  forty  years  ago  there  lived  a  Methodist  preacher  who 
had  resisted  all  persuasions  to  marry  until  he  had  reached  a  toler 
ably  advanced  age.  Shortly  after  entering  one  of  his  circuits,  a 
maiden  lady,  also  of  ripe  years,  was  strongly  recommended  to  him, 
and  his  friends  again  urged  that  he  had  better  get  married,  repre 
senting  that  the  lady  named  would  probably  not  refuse  to  accept 
him,  notwithstanding  his  reputed  eccentricities.  "  Do  you  think 
tho  ?"  was  the  response,  for  he  very  perceptibly  lisped,  "then  I'll 
go  and  thee  her."  He  was  a  man  of  his  word.  His  ring  at  the 
door-bell  was  answered  by  the  serving  maid.  "  Ith  Mith  P- 
within  ?"  briskly,  but  calmly,  asked  the  minister.  "Yes,  sir.  Will 
you  walk  in  ?"  "  No,  I  thank  you.  Be  kind  enough  to  thay  to 
Mith  P—  -  that  I-  with  to  thpeak  to  her  for  a  moment."  Miss 
P  --  appeared,  and  repeated  the  invitation  to  walk  in.  "  No, 
thank  you  ;  I'll  thoon  explain  my  bithiness.  I'm  the  Methodist 
preacher.  I'm  unmarried.  My  friendth  think  I'd  better  marry. 
They  recommend  you  for  my  wife.  Have  you  any  objection  ?" 
"Why—really,  Mr.  S  --  ."  "  There—  don't  anthwcr  now.  Will 
call  thith  day  week  for  your  reply."  At  that  day  week  he  reap 
peared  at  the  door  of  Miss  P—  —  's  residence.  It  was  answered  by 
the  lady  herself.  "  Walk  in,  Mr.  S  --  ."  "  Cannot,  ma'am.  Have 
not  time.  Start  on  my  circuit  round  in  half  an  hour.  Ith  your 
answer  ready,  ma'am  ?"  **  Oh,  do  walk  in,  Mr  S  --  ,  it  is  a  very 


254  PROPOSAL   AND   ESTOUSAL. 

serious  matter.  I  should  not  like  to  get  out  of  the  way  of  Provi 
dence."  "  I  perfectly  understand  you,  Mith  P  --  .  We  will  be 
married  thith  day  week.  I  will  call  at  thith  hour.  Pleath  be  ready, 
ma'am."  He  called  on  that  day  week  at  that  hour.  She  was 
ready  ;  they  were  married,  and  lived  happily  together.  —  Christian 
Leader. 

Unpoetical  and  unsentimental  as  the  above  manner  of  courtship 
may  appear  to  the  general  reader,  and  distasteful  as  it  may  seem 
to  the  romantic  maiden  or  the  chivalrous  "  cavalier,"  it  is  neverthe 
less  infinitely  preferable,  both  for  piety's  sake  and  propriety's  sake, 
to  the  usual  dilly-dallying,  shilly-shallying  mode  of  amorous  pro 
cedure  altogether  too  common  in  our  midst,  both  among  the  religi 
ous  and  the  irreligious  portion  of  the  community.  All  candid 
Christians  will,  we  think,  be  ready  to  admit  that  the  courting  period 
of  life,  though  very  entertaining,  interesting,  and  oftentimes  all- 
absorbing  in  character,  is  nevertheless  one  of  the  barrenest  spots  in 
the  career  of  a  useful  professor  of  the  faith  of  Christ.  This  common 
sense,  practical  way  of  assuming  the  responsibilities  of  the  marriage 
relation  seems,  despite  its  dryness  and  brevity,  to  be  more  consist 
ent  with  the  dignity  of  the  clerical  order  than  the  lighter  course  of 
conduct  pursued  by  a  certain  German  clergyman,  who  recently 
married  an  English  woman  with  romantic  ideas  out  on  an  iceberg 
in  the  Arctic  ocean. 


A   WESTERNER'S  WEDDING  DISPATCH. 

Then  he  looked  across  the  street,  and  saw  the 
signs  of  the  Chicago  Museum.  "A  show,  hey?  Well,  I'll  take 
that  in,  sure."  He  bought  a  ticket  and  passed  in,  and  was  soon 
contemplating  the  pretty  girls  in  the  costumes  of  all  nations.  Round 
and  round  he  walked,  and  all  the  time  his  wonder  grew.  He 
glanced  furtively  and  bashfully  at  the  beauties  in  their  gorgeous 


ESPOUSAL.  255 

And  becoming  costumes.  "Wonder  if  they  can't  talk  United 
States  ?"  he  thought.  Finally  he  found  a  post  against  which  he 
could  stand,  and  thus  braced,  he  pushed  his  hat  brim  up  out  of  the 
way,  and  stared  long  and  earnestly  at  one  of  the  young  ladies,  who 
seemed  to  take  his  eye.  The  girl  was  fully  conscious  of  this  ad 
miring  look,  but,  like  a  well-behaved  woman,  took  no  notice  of  it 
until  after  the  space  of  some  minutes,  when  the  steady  gaze  brought 
a  color  to  her  cheeks,  and  a  half  smile  to  her  face,  which  she  at 
tempted  to  hide  by  quickly  turning  about.  This  was  not  lost  to 
the  keen  eye  of  the  western  man,  and  several  times  he  moved  for 
ward  as  if  to  speak  to  the  girl,  but  each  time  shrank  back  bashfully 
and  resumed  his  first  position.  The  girl  became  somewhat  nervous. 
She  attempted  to  dust  off  the  front  of  her  booth  with  a  feather 
brush,  but  it  flew  from  her  fingers  upon  the  floor.  The  man  sprang 
quickly  forward,  and  handed  it  to  her  with  untaught  grace. 

"  Thank  you,  sir,"  she  said,  with  a  smile  and  a  blush. 

"  Oh,  can  you  talk  American  ?"  he  asked. 

"  Yes,  sir,"  she  replied.     "  Why  not  ?" 

w<  Oh,  I  dunno  ;  you're  wearing  a  funrin  rig,  you  know." 

"  Yes,  I  am  an  American,"  she  said. 

"  It's  a  mighty  purty  rig,  anyhow,"  he  said. 

"  Do  you  think  so  ?" 

"Yes.     Do  you  stay  here  all  the  time?" 

"  No  ;   I  live  at  home.     I'm  only  here  for  a  couple  of  weeks." 

"  I'm  a  stranger  in  town,"  he  said. 

"Indeed?" 

"  Yes,  I  live  in  Arizona." 

"  Is  that  far  away  ?" 

"  Yes.     It's  lonesome  for  me  out  there  sometimes." 

"  \Vhy  don't  you  live  in  a  city  ?" 

"'Cause  I've  got  a  ranch  and  a  lot  of  cattle." 


PROPOSAL    AND    ESPOUSAL. 

She  looked  at  him  with  sudden  respect,  for  she  had  heara  of  the 
western  cattle  kings. 

"  I  was  going  east  to  see  a  gal,"  he  said  after  a  pause.  "  But  I 
don't  think  I'll  go  now." 

"  Why  not  ?" 

"Cause  I've  found  a  girl  that  suits  me  in  Chicago." 

"  You're  lucky,"  said  the  girl,  smiling  at  the  simplicity  of  the 
man.  "  Who  is  she  ?" 

11  You." 

"  Oh,  go  on  with  your  foolishness.      You  never  saw  me  before." 

"  No,"  said  he  ;  "  but  I'm  going  to  stay  in  Chicago  and  see  you 
again.  Fact  is,  I  want  a  wife.  I'm  a  plain  man.  If  you'll  marry 
me,  say  so." 

"  This  is  so  sudden,  and  I  don't  know  you — 

•'  Never  mind  that.     Where  do  you  live  ?" 

"  Xo.  --  Blank  street." 

"  Father  and  mother  living?" 

"  Father  is  dead.      I  live  with  my  mother." 

"  And  you  come  here  to  make  a  little  money  toward  paying  the 
rent  ?" 

"  How  did  you  know  ?" 

"  Never  mind.  I'm  coming  up  to  sec  you  to-night.  I've  got 
letters  to  Chicago  men  that  will  show  who  and  what  I  am.  If  your 
mother  will  go  along  with  us,  I'll  be  glad  to  have  her  along.  Any 
way,  I'm  going  to  take  you." 

"  You're  very  confident,  seems  to  me,"  said  the  young  lady,  who 
had  suddenly  come  to  think  a  yellow  beard  handsome. 

'•Never  mind,"  said  the  Arizonian.  "Tie  up  the  dog  and  leave 
the  latch  string  out  to-night,  for  I'm  coming,"  and  he  walked  away. 

To-day  there  is  a  vacancy  in  the  "  Bazaar  of  Nations,"  for  one 
of  the  prettiest  girls  has  gone,  and  in  a  neat  little  cottage  in  the 
north  division  an  old  lady  and  girl  are  sewing  on  a  serviceable 
bridal  outfit. 


ty&v&sp 


WEDDiNG  PRESENTS  AND   BRIDAL   OUTEIT. 


T  HAS  just  been  ascertained  that  during  the  Czar's 
recent  visit  to  Denmark  he  arranged  to  give  a  grand 
wedding  present  to  his  brother-in-law,  on  the  occasion 
of  the  latter's  marriage  to  Princess  Marie  of  Orleans. 
The  Czar  mysteriously  purchased  a  villa  near  the  city 
of  Copenhagen,  and  there  was  considerable  speculation  as 
to  his  object,  and  he  has  now  given  orders  to  have  the  villa  pulled 
down,  and  a  palatial  chateau  erected  on  its  site.  The  chateau  is  to 
be  superbly  furnished,  and  is  then  to  be  presented  as  a  bridal  gift 
to  Prince  Waldemar. 


And  Caleb  said,  He  that  smitheth  Kirjath-sephcr,  and  taketh 
it,  to  him  will  I  give  Achsah  my  daughter  to  wife. 

And  Othniel,  the  son  of  Kenaz,  Caleb's  younger  brother,  took 
it  :  and  he  gave  him  Achsah  his  daughter  to  wife. 

And  it  came  to  pass,  when  she  came  to  him,  that  she  moved 
him  to  ask  of  her  father  a  field  :  and  she  lighted  from  off  her  ass  ; 
and  Caleb  said  unto  her,  What  wilt  thou  ? 

And  she  said  unto  him,  Give  me  a  blessing  :  for  thou  has  given 
me  a  south  land  ;  give  me  also  springs  of  water.     And  Caleb  gave 
her  the  upper  springs  and  the  nether  springs. — Judges. 
17*  257 


258  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

WEDDING    PRESENTS    AS    A    SOURCE    OF    REVENUE. 

"  I  am  getting  tired  of  this,"  said  an  Englewood  citizen.  "  I 
like  to  be  courteous  to  neighbors,  and  don't  mind  helping  a  young 
couple  to  a  lift,  but  I  guess  I'll  quit.  Here  is  an  invitation  to  an 
other  wedding.  Of  course  it  will  be  very  swell.  Hundreds  of 
people  who  barely  know  the  couple  will  attend  and  carry  gifts  just 
because  it  is  to  be  a  fashionable  event,  and  they  like  to  have  their 
names, in  the  papers.  Twice  within  the  last  year  I  have  gone  to 
jewellery  or  furnishing  stores  kept  by  acquaintances  of  mine,  and 
there  found  for  sale  articles  which  my  wife  or  I  had  given  the  pro 
prietors  at  their  weddings.  Of  course  they  were  duplicates,  and  no 
household  needs  23  pickle-dishes  or  19  spoonholders,  but  I  guess  I 
won't  go  to  any  more  weddings  outside  of  my  own  family.  I  don't 
object  to  helping  set  a  young  couple  up  in  their  house,  but  I  draw 
the  line  on  setting  them  up  in  business." — Chicago  Herald. 


AUTUMN     WEDDING    STYLES. 

"The  first  thing  which  strikes  the  eye  of  the  fortunate  person 
who  is  invited  to  see  the  bridal  gifts  is  the  predominance  of  silver 
ware.  We  have  now  passed  the  age  of  bronze  and  brass,  and  silver 
holds  the  first  place  of  importance.  Not  only  the  coffee  and  tea 
sets,  but  the  dinner  sets  and  the  whole  furniture  of  the  writing- 
table,  and  even  brooms  and  brushes,  are  made  with  repousse  silver 
handles — these,  of  course,  for  the  toilette,  as  for  dusting  velvet, 
feathers,  bonnets,  &c. 

The  oxidized,  ugly,  discolored  silver  has  all  gone  out,  and  the 
beautiful,  bright,  highly-polished  silver,  with  its  own  natural  and 
unmatchable  color,  has  come  in.  The  salvers  afford  a  splendid 
surface  for  a  monogram,  which  is  now  copied  from  the  old  Dutch 
silver,  and  bears  many  a  true  lover's  knot,  and  every  sort  and  kind 
of  ornamentation  ;  sometimes  even  a  little  verse,  or  posy,  as  it  was 


ESPOUSAL.  259 

called  in  olden  time.  One  tea-caddy  at  a  recent  wedding  bore  the 
following  almost  obsolete  rhyme,  which  Corydon  might  have  sent 
to  Phyllis  in  pastoral  times  :-— 

1  My  heart  to  you  is  given  ; 

Oh,  do  give  yours  to  me  ; 
We'll  lock  them  up  together, 
And  throw  away  the  key.' 

It  should  be  added  that  the  silver  tea-caddy  was  in  the  shape  of 
a  heart,  and  that  it  had  a  key.  Very  dear  to  the  heart  of  a  house 
wife  is  the  tea-caddy  which  can  be  locked. 

Another  unique  present  was  a  gold  tea-scoop  of  ancient  pattern, 
probably  once  a  baby's  pap  spoon.  There  were  also  apostle-spoons, 
and  little  silver  canoes  and  other  devices  to  hold  cigarettes  and 
ashes  ;  little  mysterious  boxes  for  the  toilette,  to  hold  the  tongs  for 
curling  hair,  and  hair  pins  ;  mirror  frames,  and  even  the  chair  backs 
and  tables — all  of  silver. 

Friends  conspire  to  make  their  offerings  together,  so  that  there 
may  be  no  duplicates,  and  no  pieces  in  the  silver  service  which  do 
not  match.  This  is  a  very  excellent  plan. 

It  is  no  longer  the  fashion  to  display  the  presents  at  the  wed 
ding.  They  are  arranged  in  an  upper  room,  and  shown  to  a  few 
friends  of  the  bride  the  day  before  the  ceremony.  Nor  is  it  the 
fashion  for  the  bride  to  wear  any  jewels.  These  are  reserved  for 
her  first  appearance  as  a  married  woman. 

The  bride  now  prefers  simplicity  in  her  dress — splendid  and 
costly  simplicity.  An  elegant  white  satin  and  a  tulle  veil,  the  lat 
ter  very  full,  the  former  extremely  long  and  with  a  sweeping  train, 
high  corsage,  and  long  sleeves,  long  white  gloves,  and  perhaps  a 
flower  in  the  hair — such  is  the  latest  fashion  for  an  autumn  bride. 
The  young  ladies  say  they  prefer  that  their  magnificence  should 
wait  for  the  days  after  marriage,  when  their  jewels  can  be  worn. 


260  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

There  is  great  sense  in  this,  for  a  bride  is  interesting  enough  when 
she  is  simply  attired. 

The  fashion  of  bridesmaids  has  gone  out  temporarily,  and  one 
person,  generally  a  sister,  alone  accompanies  the  bride  to  the  altar 
as  her  female  aid.  The  bride,  attended  by  her  father  or  near  friend, 
comes  in  last,  after  the  ushers.  After  her  mother,  sister,  and  family 
have  preceded  her,  these  near  relatives  group  themselves  about  the 
altar  steps.  Her  sister,  or  one  bridesmaid,  stands  near  her  at  the 
altar  rail,  and  kneels  with  her  and  the  bridegroom,  as  does  the  best 
man.  The  groom  takes  his  bride  from  the  hand  of  her  father  or 
nearest  friend,  who  then  retires  and  stands  a  little  behind  the  bridal 
pair.  He  must  be  near  enough  to  respond  quickly  when  he  hears 
the  words,  "  Who  givcth  this  woman  to  be  married  to  this  man  ?" 
The  bride  and  groom  walk  out  together  after  the  ceremony,  fol 
lowed  by  the  nearest  relatives,  and  proceed  to  the  home,  where  the 
wedding  breakfast  is  served.  Here  the  bridal  pair  stand  under  an 
arch  of  autumn  leaves,  golden  rod,  asters,  and  other  seasonable 
flowers,  and  receive  their  friends,  who  are  presented  by  the  ushers. 

The  father  and  mother  do  not  take  any  stated  position  on  this 
occasion,  but  mingle  with  the  guests,  and  form  a  part  of  the  com 
pany.  In  an  opulent  country  house,  if  the  day  is  fine,  little  tables 
are  set  out  on  the  lawn,  the  ladies  seat  themselves  around,  and  the 
gentlemen  carry  refreshments  to  them  ;  or  the  piazzas  are  beauti 
fully  decorated  with  autumn  boughs  and  ferns,  flowers  and  ever 
greens,  and  the  refreshments  are  served  there.  If  it  is  a  bad  day, 
of  course  the  usual  arrangements  of  a  crowded  buffet  are  in  order  ; 
there  is  no  longer  a  'sit  down '  breakfast ;  it  does  not  suit  our  Can 
adian  ideas,  as  recent  experiments  have  proved.  The  gentlemen  of 
the  bride's  family  should  wear  gloves  of  pearl-colored  kid,  embroi 
dered  in  the  seams  with  black. 

If  the  marriage  takes  place  at  home,  the  bride  and  groom  enter 
together,  and  take  their  place  before  the  clergyman,  who  has  already 


ESPOUSAL.  201 

entered  ;  then  comes  the  father  and  mother  and  other  friends.  A 
pair  of  hassocks  should  be  arranged  for  the  bridal  pair  to  kneel 
upon,  and  the  father  should  be  near  to  allow  the  clergyman  to  see 
him  when  he  asks  for  his  authority. 

For  autumn  weddings  nothing  is  so  pretty  for  the  travelling 
dress  as  a  tailor-made  costume  of  very  light  cloth,  with  sacque  to 
match  for  a  cold  day.  No  travelling  dress  should  of  itself  be  too 
heavy,  as  our  railway  carriages  are  kept  so  very  hot. 

I  saw  a  very  pretty  wedding-dress  the  other  day.  One  gets  so 
tired  of  the  hackneyed  compositions  of  satin,  lace,  and  orange  blos 
soms  that  when  anything  original  in  this  line  is  forthcoming  it  is 
well  to  make  a  note  of  it.  The  front  of  the  skirt  was  white  satin, 
covered  with  very  soft  white  lace,  thickly  studded  with  pendent 
tassels  of  crystal  beads.  The  lace  was  arranged  in  very  full  folds, 
and  these  were  caught  together  just  above  the  pleatings  that  edged 
the  skirt  in  small  gathered  groups — a  very  effective  way  of  arrang 
ing  them.  The  front  of  the  bodice  was  also  covered  with  similar 
straight  folds  of  the  lace,  tasselled  with  white  jet.  At  the  waist 
these  were  held  with  a  small  strap  of  white  satin,  tied  at  one  side 
with  a  very  small  bow.  The  bodice  and  train  were  of  white  and 
silver  brocade — an  exquisite  material.  The  wreath  was  of  orange 
blossoms,  with  a  few  small  oranges  among  the  flowers  here  and 
there.  A  garland  to  match  was  on  one  side  of  the  skirt. 


MANY    A    SLIP    TWIXT    CUP    AND    LIP." 


URIOUS  notions  in  a  matrimonial  way  arc  heard  ever 
and  anon  from  Boston.  A  young  gentleman  living  in 
the  South  End  was  once  engaged  to  a  young  lady  of 
New  York,  and  the  time  was  fixed  for  the  marriage. 
The  young  lady  had  procured  her  trousseau,  and  the 
invitations  had  been  ordered,  when  the  young  man  changed  his 
mind,  and  jilted  the  prospective  bride  most  heartlessly.  His  fickle 
fancy  had  been  caught  by  another,  and  the  piquant  point  of  the 
tale  is  that  last  week  he  was  overheard  asking  his  former  betrothed 
to  plead  his  cause  with  his  present  flame.  The  reply  of  the  young 
lady  was  unfortunately  not  reported." 


Alas  !  for  human  fate  ; 

Alas  !  for  fickle  youth  ; 
In  high  or  low  estate 

There's  nothing  true  but  truth. 

Let  truth,  then,  guide  your  way 
Obey  the  written  word  ; 

None  ever  went  astray 
That  married  in  the  Lord. 

Love's  car,  at  random  driven, 
Must  meet  mishap  most  dire  ; 
2G2 


ESPOUSAL.  263 


Commit  the  reins  to  heaven, 
God  guides  the  steeds  of  fire. 

Strong  Samson  growth  weak, 
By  Passion's  steeds  o'erthrown  ; 

Who  bars  and  bands  could  break 
Lies  foiled  by  love  alone. 

Great  Solomon,  though  wise, 
Drives,  doting  to  his  doom  ; 

His  heart  pursues  his  eyes, 
And  gives  his  God  no  room. 

King  David's  chargers  fly, 

Precipitate  and  wild  ; 
Till  judgment  meets  his  eye, 

And  slays  his  new-born  child 

If  saints,  themselves,  thus  fail, 
Then  how  wilt  thou  succeed  ? 

Through  faith  thou  shalt  prevail, 
And  be  from  bondage  freed. 

Through  all  thy  course  below, 
Be  Christ  thy  God  and  Guide  ; 

He  "  teacheth  how  to  go," 
And  none  can  help  beside. 


DIED    ON     HER    WEDDING     DAY. 

"A  Washington  despatch  says:  It  has  been  known  for  some 
time  past  among  the  German  residents  of  Washington  that  Dr. 
Emil  Bessels,  the  scientist  who  was  on  the  Polaris  Arctic  expedi 
tion,  and  Madame  Raverra,  the  singer,  were  to  have  been  married 
on  Saturday  last,  but  when  the  carriage  containing  a  friend  of  the 


264  PROPOSAL    AND    ESPOUSAL. 

doctor  arrived  at  the  Smithsonian  institute  to  take  him  to  the  wed 
ding,  it  was  found  that  he  was  confine^  to  his  bed  by  a  sudden 
attack  of  sickness.  The  ceremony  was  postponed  until  the  follow 
ing  Monday.  When  on  that  day  the  bridal  couple  reached  the 
residence  of  the  minister,  they  met  with  another  disappointment  in 
the  absence  cf  the  minister  in  Baltimore.  On  Wednesday  all  the 
arrangements  were  made  for  the  wedding,  the  minister  was  notified 
and  the  friends  informed.  The  expectant  bridegroom  drove  to  the 
house  of  his  bride  to  take  her  to  the  house  of  the  minister,  but  was 
shocked  to  learn  that  she  had  been  taken  suddenly  and  seriously 
ill.  The  progress  of  the  disease  was  so  rapid  that  by  evening 
Madame  Raverra  was  dead.  She  was  to  have  been  married  at 
twelve  o'clock. 


And  this  should  be  the  bridal  clay  ; 

\Vhcn  hope,  joy,  love  and  health 
Slvuild  crown  life's  fair}'  month  of  May 

With  all  their  dazzlin     wealth. 


This  morning  should  the  bridegroom  come 

To  claim,  with  rapture  wild, 
The  "only  daughter"  of  the  home, 

The  one,  rare,  matchless  child. 

The  hour  that  lovely  form  should  stand, 

To  breathe  the  sacred  vow  ; 
The  golden  ring  upon  her  hand, 

The  pearl-wreath  on  her  brow  — 

lint  no  !  ah,  no  !  earth's  darkest  cloud 

Has  cast  its  ray  less  gloom  ; 
Her  wedding  robe  will  be  —  the  shroud  ; 

Her  marriage  couch  —  the  tomb. 


ESPOUSAL.  265 

Go  !  hide  away  the  snowy  veil 

That  should  have  hid  love's  flush  ; 
Her  cheek  will  keep  unchanged  and  pale  ; 

Death's  kiss  will  bring  no  blush. 


"God's  will  be  done  !"  he  faintly  cries  ; 

"My  doting  heart  may  break  ; 
I  deemed  her  mine,  but  she  was  thine, 
And  he  who  gives  can  take.  —  Eliza  CccJ:. 


TEDIOUS    WOOING    IS    LOVE'S    UNDOING. 

Miss  Cecilia  McMahon,  of  Dublin,  has  proved  this  fact  to  hoi- 
cost,  and  also  to  the  cost  of  her  unfaithful  lover,  Mr.  Coleman,  whom 
she  has  sued  for  breach  of  promise.  "  In  1863  the  plaintiff  was  a 
young  girl  of  17  years,  and  the  defendant  was  32  or  33  years  of 
age,  and  he  asked  her  then  to  marry  him,  and  was  accepted.  From 
that  time  over  twenty  years  ago,  up  to  a  few  months  since,  he  had 
treated  her  as  his  affianced  wife,  introduced  her  to  his  friends,  had 
given  her  engagement  rings,  and  had  written  her  letters  breathing 
affection  and  love.  Defendant  got  plaintiff  to  postpone  the  wed 
ding  till  his  mother's  death,  on  the  ground  that  if  he  married  while 
she  was  alive  his  mother  would  not  leave  him  her  property.  This 
poor  boy  of  54  or  55  years  of  age  did  not  like  to  marry  until  the 
old  lady  died.  The  difficulty  was  now  removed,  because  six  months 
ago  the  old  lady  had  been  gathered  to  her  fathers.  A  coolness 
arose  between  the  plaintiff  and  defendant  some  time  ago,  and  in 
April  last  the  plaintiff  wrote  to  the  defendant  asking  him  what 
were  his  intentions  with  regard  to  the  engagement.  To  that  letter 
no  reply  was  received,  and  proceedings  were  taken.  The  jury 
found  for  plaintiff  £100  damages." 


MARRIAGE  CEREMONIES. 


RUTH  iii.  9- — "  I  am  Ruth,  thine  handmaid  :  spread  therefora  thy  skirt 
over  thine  handmaid." 

HE  prophet  Ezckic1,  in  describing  the  Jewish  Church  as 
an  exposed  infant,  mentions  the  care  of  G  od  in  bring 
ing  her  up  with  great  tenderness,  and  then  at  the  proper 
time  marrying  her,  which  is  expressed  in  the  same  way 
as  the  request  of  Ruth  :  "I  spread  my  skirt  over  thee  ; 
and  thou  becamest  mine." 

Dr.  A.  Clarke  says  :  "  Even  to  the  present  day,  when  a  Jew 
marries  a  woman,  he  throws  the  skirt  or  end  of  his  tailetk  over  her, 
to  signify  that  he  has  taken  her  under  his  protection." 

1  have  been  delighted  at  the  marriage  ceremonies  of  the  Hin 
doos,  to  see  amongst  them  the  same  interesting  cu3tom.  The  bride 
is  seated  on  a  throne,  surrounded  by  matrons,  wearing  her  veil,  her 
gayest  robes,  and  most  valuable  jewels.  After  the  thali  has  been 
tied  round  her  neck,  the  bridegroom  approaches  her  with  a  silken 
skirt  (purchased  by  himself),  and  folds  it  round  her  several  times 
over  the  rest  of  her  clothes.*  A  common  way  of  saying,  "He  has 
married  her,"  is.  "  He  has  given  her  the  koori" — has  spread  the 

'  This  part  of  the  ceremony  often  produces  powerful  emotions  on  all 
present.  The  parents  on  both  sides  then  give  their  benediction. 

266 


ESPOUSAL.  267 

skirt  over  her.  There  are,  however,  those  who  throw  a  long  robe 
over  the  shoulders  of  the  bride  instead  of  putting  on  the  skirt. 

An  angry  husband  sometimes  says  to  his  wife,  "Give  me  back 
my  skirt,"  meaning  that  he  wishes  to  have  the  marriage  compact 
dissolved.  So  the  mother-in-law,  should  the  new  daughter  not 
treat  her  respectfully,  says,  "  My  son  gave  this  woman  the  koori 
(skirt),  and  has  made  her  respectable,  but  she  neglects  me." 

The  request  of  Ruth,  therefore,  amounted  to  nothing  more  than 
that  Boaz  should  marry  her. — Roberts. 


In  the  celebration  of  marriages  in   the  East  at  the  present  day, 
many  of  the  peculiar  customs  of  ancient  times  are  observad.     At  a 
Hindoo    marriage,   says   a   modern    missionary,  the    procession  of 
which  I  saw  some  years  ago,  the  bridegroom  came  from  a  distance, 
and  the  bride  lived  at  Serampore,  to  which  place  the  bridegroom 
was  to  come  by  water.     After  waiting  two  or  three  hours,  at  length, 
near  midnight,  it  was  anoounced,  in  the   very  words  of  Scripture, 
"Behold  the  bridegroom  cometh  ;  go  ye  out  to  meet  him."   All  the 
persons  employed  now  lighted  their  lamps,  and   ran    with  them  in 
their  hands  to  fill  up  their  stations  in  the  procession  ;  some  of  them 
had  lost  their  lights,  and  were  unprepared,  but  it  was  then  too  late 
to  seek  them,  and  the  cavalcade  moved  forward  to  the  house  of  the 
bride  ;  at  which  place  the  company  entered  a  large  and  splendidly 
illuminated  area,  before  the  house,  covered  with  an  awning,  where 
a  great   multitude   of  friends,  dressed  in   their   best  apparel,  were 
seated  upon  mats.     The  bridegroom  was  carried  in  the  arms  of  a 
friend  and  placed  in  a  superb  seat  in  the   midst   of   the  company, 
where  he  sat  a  short  time,  and  then  went   into  the  house,  the  door 
of  which  was  immediately  shut,  and  guarded  by  Sepoys.     I  and 
others  expostulated  with  the  door  keepers,  but  in  vain.     Never  was 
I  so  struck  with  our  Lord's  beautiful  parable  as  at  this  moment— 
"and  the  door  was  shut !" 


268  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

The  journal  of  one  of  the  American  missionaries  in  Greece  con 
tains  the  account  of  an  Armenian  wedding  which  she  attended  ; 
and  after  describing  the  dresses  and  previous  ceremonies,  she  says, 
that  at  twelve  o'clock  at  night,  precisely,  the  cry  was  made  by  some 
of  the  attendants,  Behold  the  bridegroom  comcth  :  and  immedi 
ately,  five  or  six  men  set  off  to  meet  him. 

The  custom  of  crying  and  shouting  at  the  approach  of  the  bride 
groom  seems  to  have  been  continued  from  the  days  of  our  Saviour. 

For  a  very  interesting  and  minute  account  of  the  laws  and  cus 
toms  of  ancient  nations,  respecting  marriage,  polygamy,  divorce, 
&c..  the  ceremonies  attending  an  eastern  wedding,  and  the  figura 
tive  allusions  of  the  sacred  writers  to  these  topics,  the  student  is 

referred  to  Biblical  Antiquities,  ch.  vi.  par.  I  ;  Omar,  pp.  145 152; 

and  Evening  Recreations,  vol.  ii.  pp.  89-99,  by  Am.  S.  S.  Union. 

It  was  the  custom  to  crown  the  married  couple.  Hence  the 
allusion,  Sol.  Soilg  iii.  n,  Isaiah  xlix.  18,  where  the  word  ornament 
might  well  be  rendered  cro\vn, —  Union  Bible  Dictionary. 

I  he  Rhodians  had  a  peculiar  custom  of  sending  for  the  bride 
by  a  public  crier.  When  the  bridegroom  entered  the  house  with 
his  bride,  it  was  customary  to  pour  figs  upon  thoir  heads.  The  day 
of  the  bride's  departure  from  her  father  was  celebrated  in  manner 
of  a  festival.  It  seems  to  have  been  observed  at  her  father's  house 
before  she  departed,  being  distinct  from  the  nuptial  solemnity, 
which  was  kept  at  the  bridegroom's  house,  and  began  at  evening 
the  usual  time  of  the  bride's  arrival  there.  The  bridebejng  come 
to  the  bridegroom's  house,  was  entertained  with  a  sumptuous  ban 
quet,  called  by  the  same  name  with  the  marriage. 

Among  the  ancients,  when  persons  were  newly  married,  they 
put  a  yoke  upon  their  necks,  or  chains  upon  their  arms,  to  show 
that  they  were  to  be  one,  closely  united,  and  pulling  equally  to 
gether  in  all  the  concerns  of  life. 


FIRE,    OIL    AND    WATER 

OR     FLAMBEAUX,     UNGUENTS     AND    BAPTISM    USED    AT    ANCIENT 

WEDDINGS. 


HERE  was  a  custom,"  says  a  learned  Jew,  "of  bringing 
the  bride  from  her  father's  house  to   her   husband's  in 
the  night  before  she  entered  the  nuptial  chamber,  and 
to  carry  before  her  about  ten  staves,  and  on  the  top  of 
each  staff  was  the  form  of  a  brazen  dish,  and   in   the  midst 
of  it  pieces  of  garments,  oil  and  pitch,  which  they  set  fire  to 
and  lighted  before  her." 

In  many  parts  of  the  East,  particularly  in  the  Indies,  it  is  the 
custom,  instead  of  torches  and  flambeaux,  to  carry  a  pot  of  oil  in 
one  hand,  and  a  lamp,  which  is  thus  supplied  with  oil  in  the  other. 
Mention  is  made  in  "The  customs  of  the  East  Indians  and  of  the 
Jews  compared,"  of  flambeaux  used  at  bridal  ceremonies  made  of 
pieces  of  linen  squeezed  hard  together  in  a  round  form.  Those 
who  held  them  in  one  hand  have  in  the  other  a  bottle  of  oil,  and 
pour  out  of  it  from  time  to  time  on  the  linen,  which  otherwise 
gives  no  light. 

Then  all  those  virgins  arose  and  trimmed  their  lamps. — Matthew. 

"The  servants  then  did  flaming  torches  bear, 
Which  darted  forth  a  quivering  light  from  far." 
269 


2/O  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

"  They  were  sometimes  attended  with  singers  and  dancers,  as 
Homer  acquaints  us  in  his  description  of  Achilles'  shield  :— 

With  nice  and  curious  touches  next  appear 

Two  stately  cities  in  one  nuptial  are  ; 

Here  polished  art  with  nature  doth  agree 

In  framing  figures  of  festivity, 

Feasts,  revels,  balls,  the  sculpture  represents, 

With  various  sorts  of  music  instruments. 

Lamps  shine  with  brightness  on  the  solemn  state, 

While  the  brisk  bridegroom  leads  his  charming  mate  ; 

Measures  young  men  observe  with  active  feet 

While  the  pomp  advances  'long  the  dusty  street ; 

The  music  plays,  '  Hymen,  Hymen,'  they  cry, 

While  aged  matrons  stand  admiring  by. 


There  arc  of  opinion,  who  think  that  the  use  of  these  torches  was 
not  only  to  give  light,  but  to  represent  the  clement  of  fire:  for  no 
marriages  were  thought  happy  which  were  not  contracted  by  the 
light  of  fire,  for  which  reason  the  custom  likewise  was  to  be 
sprinkle  the  new  married  woman  with  \va':er  ;  yea,  they  did  both  in 
the  time  of  their  contract  touch  water  and  fire  provided  for  that 
purpose.  The  signification  of  this  ceremony  some  think  to  be 
thus  :  The  fire  because  it  is  an  active  element,  to  represent  the 
man  ;  the  water,  because  it  is  passive,  to  represent  the  woman. 

Others  say,  that  in  the  community  of  these  two  elements  was 
intimated  the  community  between  man  and  wife  of  all  their  goods 
and  possessions,  which  was  more  fully  declared  in  that  fore-quoted 
proverb  used  by  the  wife. 

What  meant  the  ancient  heathen  to  bear  before  the  bride  fire 
and  water  but  to  signify  purity?  Water,  the  washer  of  all  unclean 


ESPOUSAL.  2/1 

things,  and  fire,  the  trier  of  all  impure  things,  but  to  teach  them 
that  though  their  love  must  be  single,  it  must  be  hearty,  it  must  be 
endless,  and  it  must  be  pure. — Chailes  White,  of  Canterbury,  i6jj. 
"  The  matter,  whereof  these  torches  were  made,  was  a  certain 
tree  from  which  a  pitchy  liquor  did  issue  ;  it  was  called  Teda,  and 
hence  have  the  poets  figuratively  called  both  the  torches  and  the 
wedding  itself  Tedas." 

And,  on  coming  down  to  our  own  age  for  a  moment,  we  hear 
the  pleasant  voiced  Bryant,'  in  versifying  the  astrological  figment 
of  the  conjunction  of  Jupiter  and  Venus  as  being  a  sign  favorable 

to  marriage,  sing  : — 

"  Light  the  nuptial  torch, 

And  say  the  glad,  yet  solemn  rite,  that  knits 
The  youth  and  maiden.      Happy  days  to  them 
That  wed  this  evening  ! — a  long  life  of  love, 
And  blooming  sons  and  daughters  !      Happy  they 
Born  at  this  hour — for  they  shall  see  an  age 
Whiter  and  holier  than  the  past,  and  go 
Late  to  their  graves.      Men  shall  wear  softer  hearts, 
And  shudder  at  the  butcheries  of  war, 
As  now  at  other  murders." 


ANOINTING   THE    DOOR-POSTS. 

"When  the  woman  had  thus  been  brought  to  the  door,  then  did 
she  annoint  the  posts  of  the  door  with  oil,  from  which  ceremony 
the  wife  was  called  *  The  Annointed.'  " 

LIFTING   THE    BRIDE    OVER   THE    THRESHOLD. 

"  This  ceremony  of  annointing  being  ended,  the  bridemen  did 
lift  her  over  the  threshold,  and  so  carried  her  in  by  a  seeming  force, 
because  in  modesty  she  would  not  seem  to  go  without  violence." 


2/2  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

ANOINTING    THE    HEAD   WITH    OIL. 

On  all  joyful  occasions  the  people  of  the  East  anoint  the  head 
with  oil.  At  their  marriages,  and  other  festive  seasons,  the  young 
and  the  old  may  be  seen  with  their  long,  black  tresses  neatly  tied 
on  the  crown  of  the  head,  shining  and  smooth,  like  polished  ebony. 
The  Psalmist,  therefore,  rejoicing  in  God,  as  his  protector,  exclaims, 
''  Thou  anointcst  my  head  with  oil." 

It  is  an  act  of  great  respect  to  pour  perfumed  oil  on  the  head 
of  a  distinguished  guest  ;  the  woman  in  the  Gospel  thus  mani 
fested  her  respect  for  the  Saviour  by  pouring  "  precious  ointment." 
on  His  head.  —  Roberts. 


\YINE    AND    OIL. 

Wine  that  maketh  glad  the  heart  of  man,  and  oil  that  makcth 
his  face  to  shine.  —  David. 

A  prospective  bridegroom  quoted  the  above  passage  in  favor  of 
having  wine  at  his  wedding.  The  witty  bride  told  him  if  he  had 
wine  she  would  have  the  oil,  which  led  the  young  man  to  no  longer 
insist  on  having  a  vinous  celebration  of  the  nuptials. 


HYMNS     AND     HYMENS. 


WHO   WAS    HYMENEUS  ? 


HIS  Hymcneus,  we  are  told,  was  an  Argian,  whom  they 
received  into  the  number  of  their  gods  because  he  had 
saved  some  Athenian  virgins  from  the  lascivious  cruelty 
of  the  Pelagians.    The  word  "  Hymen  "  was  sometimes 
used   for   the    marriage   song,    as    "  Many    hymens    sung," 
"  Your  hymens,  hubbubs,  flambeaux  and  scrapers/ 
Drop  the  vowel  from  the  word  Hymen,  and  you  have  Hymn,  a 
joyful  ode  to  the  Deity  : 

"O  joyful  sound  of  gospel  grace  ! 

Christ  shall  in  me  appear  ; 
I,  even  I,  shall  see  his  face, 
I  shall  be  holy  here." 


HYMENEAL   FESTIVITIES. 

A  joyful  marriage  song  was  sung  as  the  bridal  train  moved 
along — a  hymn  in  short,  for  even  the  old  Greeks  point  out  the  ety 
mological  relation  between  Hymeneus  and  the  hymn.  Pipes  and 
harps  resounded  ;  but  as  song  was  never  without  the  accompani 
ment  of  the  measured  step  beating  the  cadence,  the  dance  and 
dancers  were  a  necessary  appendage  to  the  festival.  The  pipes, 

however,  were  clearly  of  Phrygian  origin,  and  were  connected  with 
18*  *73 


274  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

Oriental  manners.  The  observations  of  the  scholiast  expressly 
tells  us  that  the  pipe  was  unknown  to  the  earlier  Greeks.  How 
essential  song  and  dance  were  to  the  nuptial  feasts  is  clear  from  the 
command  of  Ulysses,  that  in  order  to  deceive  the  Ithacans,  there 
should  be  song  and  dance  in  the  palace  after  the  massacre  of  the 
suitors,  as  if  a  nuptial  feast  were  celebrated. 

Before  the  marriage  ceremony  the  bride  was  conducted  to  the 
bath,  after  which  she  was  dressed  in  a  garment  presented  by  the 
bridegroom.  Thus,  in  the  passage  above  quoted,  Ulysses  bade  all 
the  maidens  bathe  and  adorn  themselves.  Minerva's  injunction  to 
Nausicaa  shows  that  the  dresses  of  the  bridesmen  were  presents 
from  the  bride.  When,  at  length,  the  guardian  of  the  nuptial 
chamber  had  conducted  the  espoused  pair,  with  a  train  of  torches, 
to  the  couch  spread  with  carpets  and  rich  coverings,  she  retired, 
and  the  bridegroom  loosed  the  girdle  of  the  bride,  as  Neptune  did 
that  of  Tyro.  The  custom  of  greeting  them  with  the  epithalmian 
song  and  with  shouts  was  of  later  origin. 

Second  marriage  was  deemed  contrary  to  the  laws  of  modesty. 

*  *  *  * 

Both  bride  and  bridegroom  (the  former  veiled)  were,  of  course, 
decked  out  in  their  best  attire,  with  chaplets  on  their  heads,  and 
the  doors  of  the  houses  were  hung  with  festoons  of  ivy  and  bay- 
As  the  bridal  procession  moved  along,  the  Hymenean  song  was 
sung  to  the  accompaniment  of  Lydian  flutes,  even  in  olden  times, 
as  beautifully  described  by  Homer,  and  the  married  pair  received 
greetings  and  congratulations  of  those  who  met  them.  After  enter 
ing  the  bridegroom's  house,  into  which  the  bride  was  probably 
conducted  by  his  mother  bearing  a  lighted  torch,  it  was  customary 
to  shower  sweatmeats  upon  them  as  emblems  of  plenty  and 
prosperity. 

After  this  came  the  nuptial  feast,  which  was  generally  given  in 
the  house  of  the  bridegroom  or  his  parents  ;  and,  besides  being  a 


ESPOUSAL.  275 

festive  meeting,  served  other,  and  more  important  purposes.  There 
was  no  public  rite,  whether  civil  or  religious,  connected  with  the 
celebration  of  marriage  among  the  ancient  Greeks,  and  therefore 
no  public  record  of  its  solemnization.  This  deficiency,  then,  was 
supplied  by  the  marriage  feast  ;  for  the  guests  were,  of  course, 
competent  to  prove  the  fact  of  a  marriage  having  taken  place  ;  and 
Demosthenes,  indeed,  says  they  were  invited  partly  with  such  views. 
To  this  feast,  contrary  to  the  usual  practice  among  the  Greeks, 
women  were  invited  as  well  as  men,  but  they  seem  to  have  sat  at  a 
separate  table,  with  the  bride  still  veiled  among  them.  At  the 
conclusion  of  this  feast  she  was  conducted  by  her  husband  into  the 
bridal  chamber  ;  and  a  law  of  Solon's  required  that,  on  entering  it, 
they  should  eat  a  quince  together,  as  if  to  indicate  that  their  con 
versation  ought  to  be  sweet  and  agreeable.  The  sonq;  called  Rph- 
thalamium  was  then  sung  before  the  doors  of  the  bridal  chamber. 
— A  nt J  10 11  s  Greece. 


PRESENTING  THE  HAIR    AT    MARRIAGE. 


the  day  before  marriage  the  Grecian  maidens  shaved  ofT 
K 
I*     their  hair,  and   presented   it  to  the  different    divinities 

worshipped  by  them. 


"When  maiden  blushes  could  make  no  pretence, 
^'v^J          And  vigorous  age  had  sullied  innocence, 
As  anciently  the  Argives  hither  came 
To  vent  their  passion  and  their  love  proclaim, 
They  paid  Diana  then  their  virgin  hair. 


Pollux  mentions  some  who  offered  their  hair  to  Diana  and  the 
fatal  sisters.  At  Trcezen  the  Virgins  were  obliged  to  consecrate 
their  hair  to  Hippolytus,  the  son  of  Theseus,  who  died  for  his  chas 
tity,  before  they  entered  into  the  marriage  bonds.  The  Megaren- 
sian  virgins  offered  their  hair  with  libations  at  the  momiment  of 
Iphinoe,  daughter  ot  Alcathous,  who  died  a  virgin. 

*  *  *  *  * 

Then  did  Achilles,  that  brave  prince,  prepare 
For  other  rites,  and  shave  his  golden  hair. 

***** 

The  custom  of  nourishing  the  hair  on  religious  accounts  seems 
to  have  prevailed  in  most  nations.  The  Jews  had  their  Nazarites. 
Osiris,  the  Egyptian,  consecrated  his  hair  to  the  gods  ;  and  Arian 

276 


ESPOUSAL.  2/7 

tells  us  that  in  India  it  was  the  custom  to  preserve  the  hair  for 
some  god,  which  they  first  learnt  from  Bacchus.  —  Potters  An 
tiquities  of  Greece. 

When  thou  goest  forth  to  war  against  thine  enemies,  and  the 
Lord  thy  God  hath  delivered  them  into  thine  hands,  and  thou  hast 
taken  them  captive, 

And  seest  among  the  captives  a  beautiful  woman,  and  hast  a 
desire  unto  her,  that  thou  wouldst  have  her  to  thy  wife  ; 

Then  thou  shall  bring  her  home  to  thine  house  ;  and  she  shall 
shave  her  head  and  pare  her  nails  ; 

And  she  shall  put  the  raiment  of  her  captivity  from  off  her,  and 
shall  remain  in  thine  house,  and  bewail  her  father  and  her  mother 
a  full  month  :  and  after  that  thou  shalt  be  her  husband,  and  she 
shall  be  thy  wife. 

And  it  shall  be,  if  thou  have  no  delight  in  her,  then  thou  shalt 
let  her  go  whither  she  will  ;  but  thou  shalt  not  sell  her  at  all  for 
money,  thou  shalt  not  make  merchandise  of  her.- 


MARRIAGEABLE    LADIES   DISTINGUISHED    BY   THEIR  HEAD-DRESS. 

"The  following  details  with  regard  to  the  hair-dressing  of  the 
Japanese  ladies  may  be  of  interest  in  these  days,  when  ladies  are 
ignorantly  adopting  the  styles,  and  may  help  to  elucidate  much  of 
the  mystery  which  always  surrounds  the  meaning  of  a  Japanese 
picture.  In  Japan,  a  girl  at  the  age  of  nine  begins  to  wear  her 
tresses  tied  up  with  a  narrow  crimson  scarf  bound  round  the  back 
of  her  head.  The  forehead  is  left  bare  with  the  exception  of  a 
couple  of  locks,  one  on  each  side.  When  she  is  of  marriageable 
age  she  combs  her  hair  forward,  and  arranges  it  in  the  shape  of  a 
fan  or  butterfly,  decorating  it  with  silver  cord  and  ball-topped  pins 
*See  Mark  x.  2-12. 


278  PROPOSAL    AND    ESPOUSAL. 

of  various  colors.  An  inconsolable  widow  cuts  her  hair  short,  and 
goes  in  for  no  adorning  whatever  :  a  consolable  widow  wears  tor 
toise-shell  pins  set  horizontally  at  the  back  of  her  head,  and  twists 
her  hair  in  loose  coils  about  them.  By  all  these  simple  means 
much  confusion  is  avoided.  This  last  mode  is  one  most  adopted 
by  American  ladies  ;  therefore,  while  its  significance  would  be  Greek 
to  an  American  gentleman,  it  would  have  the  above  significance  to 
a  'Jap  '  visitor." 

In  monuments  of  antiquity,  the  heads  of  the  married  and  of  the 
single  women  may  be  known,  the  former  by  their  hair  being  parted 
from  the  forehead  over  the  middle  of  the  top  of  the  head,  the  latter 
by  being  quite  close,  or  by  being  plaited  and  curled  all  in  a  gen 
eral  mass. 


HAIR    PEARL  -EMUROIDERKD    FORBIDDEN    TO   CHRISTIANS. 

In  like  manner  also,  that  women  adorn  themselves  in  modest 
apparel,  with  shamefacedness  and  sobriety  ;  not  with  braided  hair 
or  gold,  or  pearls,  or  costly  array  ; 

But  (which  becorncth  women    professing   godliness)   with  good 

works. 

***** 

Whose  adorning  let  it  not  be  that  outward  adorning  of  plaiting 
the  hair,  and  of  wearing  of  gold,  or  of  putting  on  of  apparel  : 

But  let  it  be  the  hidden  man  of  the  heart,  in  that  which  is  not 
corruptible,  even  the  ornament  of  a  meek  and  quiet  spirit,  which  is 
in  the  sight  of  God  of  great  price. 

For  of  this  manner  in  the  old  time  the  holy  women  also,  who 
trusted  in  God,  adorned  themselves,  being  in  subjection  unto  their 
own  husbands.  —  New  Testament. 

Plaiting  the  hair  was  commonly  used  in  those  times  by  lewd 
women. 


ESPOUSAL.  279 

Among  the  Jews  there  were  women  who  made  it  a  gainful 
profession  to  plait  women's  hair.  The  art  must  have  required  some 
practice  and  skill,  since  it  seems  that  the  taste  of  the  Jewish  women 
inclined  them  to  have  their  hair  set  up  by  the  aid  of  crisping  pins 
in  the  forms  of  horns  and  towers. 

It  was  also  practiced  anciently  in  every  part  of  the  East,  and  is 
to  the  present  day  in  India,  also  in  Barbary.  It  was  prevalent 
among  the  Greeks  and  Romans,  as  ancient  gems,  busts  and  statutes 
afford  sufficient  evidence. 


LONG    HAIR    NOT   SEEMLY    FOR    MEN,    NOR   SHORT    HAIR   COMELY 

FOR    WOMEN. 

Doth  not  nature  itself  teach  you  that,  if  a  man  have  long  hair, 
it  is  a  shame  unto  him. 

But  if  a  woman  have  long  hair,  it  is  a  glory  to  her,  for  her  hair 
is  given  to  her  for  a  covering. 

But  if  any  man  seem  to  be  contentious,  we  have  no  such  custom, 
neither  the  churches  of  God. — Neiv  Testament. 

So  sweetly  do  Scripture  and  nature  agree,  and  so  deth 
divine  truth  harmonize  with  whatsoever  things  are  honest,  whatso 
ever  things  are  lovely,  and  whatsoever  things  are  of  good  report, 
that  we  find  all  fashions  that  arise  to  contravene  the  combined  tenor 
of  the  eternal  twain  gradually  sink  into  disesteem  and  fall  into 
merited  reproach  and  contempt,  and  so  it  is  proved  by  observation 
and  experience  and  history  combined,  that  the  Bible  sets  the  best 
fashions  ;  the  Puritan  Roundheads  (so  called  in  ridicule)  have  a 
world  of  followers  to-day,  while  the  Royalists,  who  so  named  them, 
are  altogether  out  of  style. 

Thine  hair  upon  thee  is  like  Carmcl. 

His  head  is  bushy  and  black  as  a  raven. — Canticles. 


280  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

But  in  all  Israel  there  was  none  to  be  so  much  praised  as  Ab 
salom  for  his  beauty  :  from  the  sole  of  his  foot  even  to  the  crown 
of  his  head  there  was  no  blemish  in  him. 

And  when  he  polled  his  head  (for  it  was  at  every  year's  end 
that  he  polled  it :  because  the  hair  was  heavy  on  him,  therefore  he 
polled  it)  he  weighed  the  hair  of  his  head  at  two  hundred  shekels 
after  the  king's  weight. — Samuel. 


And  she  made  him  sleep  upon  her  knees  ;  and  she  called  for  a 
man,  and  she  caused  him  to  shave  off  the  seven  locks  of  his  head  ; 
and  she  began  to  afflict  him,  and  his  strength  went  from  him. 

And  she  said,  The  Philistines  be  upon  thee,  Samson.  And  he 
awoke  out  of  his  sleep,  and  said,  I  will  go  out  as  at  other  times  be 
fore,  and  shake  myself.  And  he  wist  not  that  the  Lord  was  depart 
ed  from  him.  —  Bible. 

He  sleeps  on  her  knees,  and  his  locks  are  close  shorn, 

Uncut  from  his  Xazarite  birth  ; 
Lo  !  his  vigor  is  gone,  and  he  wakes  to  rude  scorn  : 

Heaven's  Anteus  tumbles  to  earth. 

So  the  sinner  thus  sleeps  on  the  lap  of  fair  Sloth, 
While  the  shears  of  fair  Vice  are  being  plied  ; 

See!  his  locks  are  fast  falling  —  the  Phillistines  rush  forth, 
And  his  glory  lies  humbled,  and  pride. 


It  is  an  instructive  thought,  that  among  the  Gentile  nations  the 
marriageable  parties  never  forgot  their  Gods.  These  were  the  first 
to  be  remembered.  For,  as  saith  the  prophet,  surely  every  man 
will  walk  in  the  name  of  his  god.  Though  their  spot  was  not  the 
spot  of  God's  children,  yet  the  mark  of  the  idol  was  ever  there. 


ESPOUSAL.  28t 

Fathers,  mothers,  youths  and  maidens  were  all  invited  at  the 
marriage  season  to  propitiate  with  offerings  their  respective  divin 
ities,  and  nothing  was  ever  done  without  consulting  their  celestial 
guardians. 

With  regard  to  the  sacrifices  then  offered,  they  arc  spoken  of 
by  the  poet  as  a  dialogue  between  Clymenestra  and  Agamemnon  : 


,  have  you  killed  the  victim  for  the  goddess, 
My  daughters  wedding  to  initiate? 
ga.—  Y\\  see  that  done,  for  that  is  my  design. 
Cly.—  And  then  the  wedding  dinner  ?     4£Y7.—  That  we'll  have, 
When  to  the  gods  the  victims  offered  arc. 


When  the  victim  was  opened,  the  gall  was  taken  out  and  thrown 
behind  the  altar,  as  being  the  seat  of  anger  and  malice,  and  there 
fore  the  aversion  of  all  the  deities  who  had  the  care  of  love,  as  well 
as  those  who  became  their  votaries.  The  entrails  were  carefully 
inspected  by  the  soothsayers,  and  if  any  unlucky  omen  presented 
itself,  the  former  contract  was  dissolved  as  displeasing  to  the  Godsj 
and  the  nuptials  prevented.  The  same  happened  on  the  appear 
ance  of  any  ill-boding  omen  without  the  victim  ;  thus  we  find  in 
Achilles  Tatius,  that  C'.itophon's  designed  marriage  with  Calligone 
was  hindered  by  an  eagle,  that  snatched  a  piece  of  the  sacrifice 
from  the  altar. 

The  Athenian  virgins  were  presented  to  Diana  before  it  was 
lawful  for  them  to  marry,  and  it  was  not  permitted  them  to  enter 
into  the  married  state  till  they  had  paid  their  devotions  to  this 
goddess  in  her  own  temple  at  the  citadel.  Venus,  too,  the  goddess 
of  love  and  hearts,  and  all  the  rest  of  the  divinities  superintending 
marriages,  were  invoked.— Potters  Antiquities  of  Greece. 


TUE  ORIGIN,  USE  AND  DESIGN  OF  THE  RING. 

w  •'/',-  '•:  %  1  1  !•".  ring,  as  given  in  marriage,  is  ;i  pledge,  and  the  word 
"  wed  "  in  Anglo-Saxon  means  the  same  thing,  The 
wedding  ring,  therefore,  is  a  sacred  and  symbolic  token 
given  by  the  man  to  avouch  that  he  will  perform  his 
part  of  the  contract,  thus  :  "With  this  ring  I  thee  wed.' 
A  symbol  of  eternity  in  its  roundness,  and  of  truth  in  its 
preciousness,  and  of  chastity  in  its  plain  and  unengraved  design,  it 
remains  forever  the  universal  emblem  of  fidelity  and  mutual  love. 


RING    MONEY. 

"  In  ancient  Egypt,  and  probably  also  in  ancient  Etruria,  the 
oldest  form  of  money  was  a  ring,  and  when  an  Egyptian  took  home 
his  bride,  in  pledge  of  investing  her  with  his  personal  wealth,  he- 
placed  a  ring,  or  piece  of  money  on  her  finger;  from  Etruria  the 
same  usage  originated  the  invention,  even  after  coined  money  was 
invented,  of  the  annuli  sponsalii,  and  from  them  and  their  Roman 
successors  the  wedd-ng  ring  has  been  handed  down  as  a  necessary 
part  of  the  conjugal  ritualia  to  the  present  day.  It  seems  probable 
that  the  Alexandrian  Christians  first  engrafted  into  Christianity  at 
an  exceedingly  early  period  the  significant  symbol,  and  spiritualiz 
ing  the  ornament,  introduced  it  into  the  church  as  a  pledge  of  the 
mystic  union  of  the  husband  and  wife,  and  of  the  bishop  and  his 


ESPOUSAL.  283 

church,  which  in  the  Roman  and  Ultra-Anglican  communions  it 
still  retains.  Long  may  the  plain  gold  ring  remain  a  sacred  emblem, 
and  be  associated  with  all  the  truest  poetry  of  life,  and  may  none 
of  those  who  read  this  article  regard  it  in  any  other  light,  or  regret 
to  bestow  or  receive  it." 


WHY   THE    RING    IS    PLACED   ON    THE    FOURTH     FINGER    OF    THE 

LEFT    HAND. 

"Originally  the  fourth  finger  of  the  left  hand  was  chosen  to  be 
thus  ornamented,  as  it  was  supposed  to  compress  a  small  nerve 
which  went  from  the  digit  direct  to  the  heart.  Afterwards  the 
second  finger  of  the  right  hand,  and  then  again  the  last  of  both, 
were  adorned  with  rings.  Increasing  in  degeneracy  and  foppery,  at 
the  time  of  Martial,  every  joint  of  each  finger  had  its  separate  an- 
nulus.  These  amounting  to  a  cumbrous  load  in  the  warm  weather, 
necessitated  the  introduction  of  summer,  as  distinguished  from 
winter,  rings  (a  custom  adopted  also  by  the  Romans).  This  con 
venient  resource  enabled  the  wealthier  Grecians  to  display  still 
more  and  a  greater  variety  of  jewellery,  and  the  climax  of  absurdity 
and  extravagance  was  attained  in  the  fashion,  which  survived  the 
fall  of  the  people  who  originated  it,  of  wearing  weekly  rings." 


THE    RING   NOT   TO   BE    FORCED. 

I  think  death  were  a  better  thing 
Than  loathed  love  and  marriage  ring 

Forced  on  my  soul  together. 

— E.  D.  Browning. 

"  The  gentlest  effort  may  put  a  wedding  ring  on  the  finger,  but 
a  thousand  horse-power  cannot  draw  it  off." 


284  PROPOSAL  AND   ESPOUSAL. 

A    MATHEMATICAL    COLLOQUY. 
Laura.  —  On  me  he  shall  ne'er  put  a  ring, 

So,  mamma,  'tis  in  vain  to  make  trouble  ; 
For  I  was  but  eighteen  last  spring, 
While  his  age  exactly  is  double. 
Mamma.  —  He  is  but  in  his  thirty-sixth  year, 

Tall,  handsome,  good-natured  and  witty  ; 
And  should  you  refuse  him,  my  dear, 

You  may  die  an  old  maid  without  pity. 
Laura.  —  His  figure  I  grant  you  may  pass, 

And  at  present  he's  young  enough  plenty  ; 
But  when  I  am  sixty,  alas  ! 

Won't  he  be  a  hundred  and  twenty  ? 

—  Moore  's  Rural  New  Yorker. 

HOW    THE    WHOLE    HAND    WENT    THROUGH    A    FINGER-RING. 

A  little,  skipping  minim  of  mortal  existence  was  shown  among 
the  wonders  of  the  Centennial  at  Philadelphia,  who  was  so  diminu 
tive  in  size  that  when  twelve  years  of  age  she  stood  but  twenty-one 
inches  in  height  Her  legs  were  four  inches  in  circumference,  and 
her  feet  three  inches  long.  There  was  nothing  long  about  her  but 
her  tongue,  and  that  certainly  was  not  short.  She  was  of  Spanish 
extraction,  Spanish  complexion,  and  Spanish  volubility  of  speech  ; 
and  she  looked  irresistibly  funny  as  she  crouched  clown,  all  out  of 
sight  but  her  head,  into  the  dimensions  of  a  spectator's  silk  hat,  and 
peered  at  you  over  the  encompassing  brim.  We  saw  her  squeeze 
her  lilliputian  hand  through  a  rather  large  finger  ring,  and  she  also 
sat  on  a  boy's  hand,  and  felt,  apparently,  comfortable. 


CHARLEMAGNE   AND   THE    RING. 

Wre  are  told  that  the  Emperor  Charlemagne  was  bewitched  by 
a  ring,  and  that  he  followed  the  one  who  possessed   this  ring  as  a 


ESPOUSAL.  285 

needle  does  a  iodestone.  It  is  said  that  he  fell  in  love  with  a  peasant 
girl  (Agatha),  in  whose  society  he  seemed  bewitched,  insomuch  that 
all  matters  of  state  were  neglected  by  him  ;  but  the  girl  died,  to  the 
great  joy  of  all.  What,  however,  was  the  astonishment  of  the  court 
to  find  that  the  king  seemed  no  less  bewitched  with  the  dead  body 
than  the  living,  and  spent  day  and  night  with  it,  even  when  the  smell 
was  quite  offensive.  Archbishop  Turpin  felt  convinced  that  there 
was  sorcery  in  this  strange  infatuation,  and  on  examining  the  body 
found  a  ring  under  the  tongue,  which  he  removed.  Charlemagne 
now  lost  all  regard  for  the  dead  body,  but  followed  Turpin,  with 
whom  he  seemed  infatuated.  The  Archbishop  now  bethought  him 
of  the  ring,  which  he  threw  into  a  pool  at  Aix,  where  Charlemagne 
built  a  palace  and  monastery,  and  no  spot  in  the  world  had  such 
attractions  for  him  at  Aix-la-Chappelle.  where  the  ring  was  buried. 
—  Researches  de  la  France. 


ALEXANDER'S  RING. 

'  Finding  that  there  was  no  hope  of  recovery  left,  he  delivered 
his  ring  to  Perdiccas,  and  permitted  all  his  soldiers  to  kiss  his  hand. 
On  being  asked  to  whom  he  left  his  empire,  he  answered,  '  To  the 
most  worthy  ;'  adding  at  the  same  time  that  he  foresaw  with  what 
strange  rites  they  would  celebrate  his  burial." 


SARAH,   DUCHESS   OF   MARLBOROUGH'S    RING. 

"  Lord  Chesterfield,  however,  triumphantly  pointing  to  the  fruits 
of  his  taste  and  distribution  of  his  wealth,  witnessed,  in  his  library 
at  Chesterfield  House,  the  events  which  time  produced.  He  heard 
of  the  death  of  Sarah,  Duchess  of  Marlborough,  and  of  her  bequest 
to  him  of  twenty  thousand  pounds,  and  her  best  and  largest  bril 
liant  diamond  ring,  '  out  of  the  great  regard  she  had  for  his  merit, 
and  the  infinite  obligations  she  had  received  from  him.'" 


PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 
QUEEN    CAROLINE'S    (WIFE    OF   GEORGE    II.)    RING. 

When  alone  with  her  family,  she  took  from  her  finger  a  ruby 
ring,  which  had  been  placed  upon  it  at  the  time  of  the  coronation, 
and  gave  it  to  the  king.  "  This  is  the  last  thing,"  she  said,  "  I  have 
to  give  you  ;  naked  I  came  to  you,  and  naked  I  go  from  you  ;  I 
had  everything  I  ever  possessed  from  you,  and  to  you  whatever  I 
have  I  return."  She  then  asked  for  her  keys,  and  gave  them  to  the 
king.  To  the  Princess  Caroline  she  intrusted  the  care  of  her 
younger  sisters  ;  to  the  Duke  of  Cumberland,  that  of  keeping  up 
the  credit  of  the  family.  "  Attempt  nothing  against  your  brother, 
and  endeavor  to  mortify  him  by  showing  superior  merit,"  she  said 
to  him.  She  advised  the  king  to  marry  again  ;  he  heard  her  in 
sobs,  and  with  much  difficulty  got  out  this  sentence  :  "  NonJ'aurai 
To  which  the  queen  made  no  other  reply  than  ; 
'  Ah,  man  Dieu  !  cela  n'empeche  pas"  "  I  know,"  says  Lord  Hervey, 
in  his  Memoirs,  "that  this  episode  will  hardly  be  credited,  but  it  is 
literally  true."  —  Grace  and  Philip  Wharton. 


RINGS    AND    THEIR    SIGNIFICATION. 

"  It  is  understood,  says  an  American  authority,  that  a  gentleman 
who  desires  to  marry  wears  a  plain  or  chased  gold  ring  upon  the 
first  finger  of  the  left  hand.  When  he  becomes  engaged,  the  ring 
passes  to  the  second  finger.  After  marriage  it  passes  to  the  third 
finger.  If,  however,  the  gentleman  desires  his  lady  friends  to  clear 
ly  understand  that  he  is  not  'in  the  market/  and  does  not  wish  to 
marry  at  all,  he  wears  the  signet  upon  his  little  finger.  This  will 
inform  all  the  ladies  that  he  is  beyond  their  reach.  With  the  ladies, 
a  plain  or  chased  gold  ring  on  the  little  finger  of  the  left  hand  in 
dicates  '  not  engaged,  '  or  '  ready  for  an  offer.'  When  engaged,  the 
ring  passes  to  the  third  finger  on  the  right  hand.  When  married 


ESPOUSAL.  287 

the  third  finger  on  the  left  hand  receives  the  ring1.  When  a  young 
lady  wishes  to  defy  all  suitors,  she  places  rings  —  one  on  the  first 
and  one  on  the  fourth  finger." 

SPURIOUS    ENGAGEMENT    RINGS. 

"  That  ring,"  said  the  jeweller,  as  the  reporter  picked  up  a  seven 
stone,  cluster  diamond,  "will  cost  you  $12.  If  you  return  it  within 
six  months  you  will  receive  a  rebate  of  $5."  "What  !  Only  $12 
for  a  cluster  diamond  ring  !"  exclaimed  the  astonished  scribe.  "  I 
said  $12,"  was  the  calm  reply.  "  Here  (lifting  out  another  tray)  is 
the  mate  to  it  —  price  $180."  "  Enlighten  me,"  pleaded  the  report 
er.  "  I  will,  although  it  is  odd  that  you  haven't  caught  on  to  this 
little  game.  The  American  is  a  hustler  in  all  things.  If  he  falls  in 
love,  he  goes  with  the  same  rush  that  characterizes  a  business  tran 
saction.  He  wants  to  be  engaged  and  have  the  day  set,  but  in 
perhaps  three  cases  out  of  ten  his  ardour  cools  before  the  fatal  day 
arrives,  and  he  '  throws  '  the  match."  "  I  see."  "  He  has  given  the 
girl  an  engagement  ring.  He  can  scarcely  muster  up  courage  to 
ask  for  its  return,  and  the  chances  are  he  wouldn't  get  it  if  he  did, 
This  cluster  diamond  ring  at  $12  fills  a  want  long  felt.  The  gold- 
plating  will  wear  for  six  months,  and  the  paste  diamond  will  sparkle 
and  glisten  for  about  the  same  length  of  time.  If  at  the  end  of 
six  months  he  discovers  that  his  feelings  have  changed  he  breaks 
off  the  match,  and  is  little  or  nothing  out  of  pocket.  If  time  has 
only  welded  his  love  the  firmer,  so  to  speak,  he  gets  the  spurious 
ring  from  her  to  have  their  initials  engraved  on  the  inside,  and 
comes  here  and  changes  it  for  the  simon-pure.  See." 


NEWTON'S   DREAM    RING. 

Says  Newton,  in  the  narrative  of  his  life  :  —  "I  thought  it  was 
night,  and  my  watch  upon  deck  ;  and  that   I   was   walking  to  and 


288  PROPOSAL   AND    ESPOUSAL. 

fro  by  myself,  a  person  came  to  me  and  brought  me  a  ring,  with  an 
express  charge  to  keep  it  carefully  ;  assuring  me  that  while  I  pre 
served  that  ring  I  should  be  happy  and  successfull  ;  but  if  I  lost  or 
parted  with  it,  I  must  expect  nothing  but  trouble  and  misery.  I 
accepted  the  present  and  the  terms  willingly,  not  in  the  least  doubt 
ing  my  own  care  to  preserve  it,  and  highly  satisfied  to  have  my 
happiness  in  my  own  keeping.  I  was  engaged  in  these  thoughts 
when  a  second  person  came  to  me,  and  observing  the  ring  on  my 
finger,  took  occasion  to  ask  some  questions  concerning  it.  I  readily 
told  him  its  virtues,  and  his  answer  expressed  a  surprise  at  my 
weakness  in  expecting  such  effects  from  a  ring.  I  think  he  reas 
oned  with  me  some  time  upon  the  impossibility  of  the  thing  ;  and 
at  length  urged  me  in  direct  terms  to  throw  it  away.  At  first  I 
was  shocked  at  the  proposal,  but  his  insinuations  prevailed.  I  be 
gan  to  reason  and  doubt,  and  at  last  plucked  it  off  my  finger  and 
dropped  it  over  the  ship's  side  into  the  water,  which  it  no  sooner 
touched  than  I  saw  in  the  same  instant  a  terrible  fire  burst  out 
from  a  range  of  mountains.  I  perceived  too  late  my  folly  ;  and  my 
tormenter  with  an  air  of  insult  informed  me  that  all  the  mercy  God 
had  in  reserve  for  me  was  comprised  in  that  ring  which  I  had  wil 
fully  thrown  away.  I  understood  that  I  must  now  go  with  him  to 
the  burning  mountains,  and  that  all  the  flames  I  saw  were  kindled 
on  my  account.  I  trembled,  and  was  in  great  agony  ;  so  that  it 
was  surprising  I  did  not  then  awake  ;  but  my  dream  continued  ; 
and  when  I  thought  myself  on  the  point  of  a  constrained  departure, 
and  stood  self-condemned  without  plea  or  hope,  suddenly  a  person 
came  to  me  and  demanded  the  cause  of  my  grief.  I  told  him  the 
plain  case,  confessing  that  I  had  ruined  myself  wilfully,  and  de 
served  no  pity.  He  blamed  my  rashness,  and  asked  if  I  should  be 
wiser  supposing  I  had  my  ring  again.  I  had  not  time  to  answer 
before  I  saw  this  unexpected  friend  go  down  under  the  water  just 
in  the  spot  where  I  had  dropped  it  ;  and  he  soon  returned,  bringing 
the  ring  with  him.  The  moment  he  came  on  board,  the  flames  in 


ESPOUSAL.  289 

the  mountains  were  extinguished,  and  my  seducer  left  me.  Then 
was  '  the  prey  taken  from  the  hand  of  the  mighty,  and  the  lawful 
captive  delivered  '  ' 

TEST    RINGS. 

With  the  Romans  first  arose  the  use  of  test  rings,  or  those  the 
germ  of  which,  either  like  the  toadstone  (Craitpadine),  was  supposed 
to  detect  poison,  or,  like  the  amethyst,  to  prevent  intoxication.  The 
jewel  was  occasionally  the  cover  of  a  small  recess,  destined  either 
to  contain  poison,  or  a  sovereign  remedy  against  the  plague.  These 
last  uses  of  the  ring  have  continued  almost  to  the  present  day, 
while  in  Italy  the  amethyst  ring  is  yet  worn  by  monks  to  secure 
their  safety  from  post-prandial  excesses. 


THE     DEATH     RING. 

A  man  who  wished  to  buy  a  handsome  ring  went  into  a  jewel 
ler's  shop  at  Paris,  and  desired  to  see  some.  The  jeweller  showed 
him  a  very  ancient  gold  ring,  remarkably  fine,  and  curious  on  this 
account,  that  on  the  inside  of  it  were  two  little  lion's  claws.  The 
buyer,  while  looking  at  others,  was  playing  with  this  ;  at  last  he 
purchased  another,  and  went  away.  But  he  had  scarcely  reached 
home  when  first  his  hand,  then  his  side,  then  his  whole  body,  be 
came  numb  and  without  feeling,  as  if  he  had  had  a  stroke  of  the 
palsy  ;  and  it  grew  worse  and  worse,  till  the  physician,  who  came 
in  haste,  thought  him  dying.  "  You  must  somehow  have  taken 
poison,"  he  said.  The  sick  man  protested  that  he  had  not.  At  last 
some  one  remembered  this  ring  ;  and  it  was  then  discovered  to  be 
what  used  to  be  called  the  death  ring,  and  which  was  often  em 
ployed  in  those  wicked  Italian  States  three  or  four  hundred  years 

ago.     If  a  man  hated  another,  and  desired  to  murder  him,  he  would 
19* 


PROPOSAL   AND    ESPOUSAL. 

present  him  with  one  of  them.  In  the  inside  was  a  drop  of  deadly 
poison,  and  a  very  small  hole  out  of  which  it  would  not  make  its 
way  except  it  was  squeezed.  When  the  poor  man  was  wearing  it, 
the  murderer  would  come  and  shake  his  hand  violently,  the  lion's 
claw  would  give  his  hand  a  little  scratch,  and  in  a  few  hours  he  was 
a  dead  man.  Now  see  why  I  told  you  this  story.  For  four  hund 
red  years  this  ring  had  kept  its  poison,  and  at  the  end  of  that  time 
it  was  strong  enough  to  almost  kill  the  man  who  had  unintention 
ally  scratched  his  finger  with  the  claw  ;  for  he  was  only  saved  by 
great  skill  on  the  part  of  the  physician,  and  by  the  strongest  medi 
cines.  I  thought  when  I  read  this  story  how  like  this  poison  was 
to  sin.  You  may  commit  a  sin  now,  and  for  the  present  forget  it  ; 
and  perhaps  ten  or  twelve  years  hence  the  wound  you  then,  so  to 
speak,  gave  yourself  may  break  out  again,  and  that  more  danger 
ously  than  ever.  And  the  greatest  danger  of  all  is,  lest  the  thoughts 
of  sins  we  have  committed,  and  the  pleasure  we  had  in  committing 

o 

them,  should  come  back  upon  us  in  the  hour  of  death. — Dr.  J.  J/. 
Xea/e. 


"  I  low  Princes  make  love  is  told  in  the  '  Reminiscences  of  the 
Marquis  Custine,'  which  have  just  appeared  in  Paris.  When  the 
Czar  Xikolaus  was  eighteen  years  old  he  sp?nt  two  days  in  Ber 
lin,  where  he  saw  the  Princess  Charlotte,  two  years  younger,  and  of 
a  delicate  beaut}-  which  at  once  attracted  him.  She,  however, 
showed  no  signs  of  reciprocating  his  affection.  On  the  evening 
before  his  departure  he  sat  next  to  the  Princess  at  dinner.  "  I  shall 
leave  to-morrow,'  he  suddenly  remarked.  She  did  not  show  any 
surprise,  but  quickly  answered,  '  We  shall  all  be  sorry  that  you 
leave  us  so  soon.  Cannot  your  departure  be  delayed  ?'  '  That  de 
pends  on  you.'  '  How  so?'  asked  the  Princess.  The  Prince  now 
declared  his  love,  somewhat  to  her  embarrassment,  as  she  thought 


ESPOUSAL.  29 1 

they  we u Id  be  overheard.  As  a  pledge  of  her  love  he  asked  for 
the  ring  she  wore,  suggesting  that  no  one  would  notice  it  if  she  took 
it  off,  and  pressing  it  into  a  piece  of  bread  pushed  it  towards  his 
plate.  The  ring,  however,  was  not  hers,  but  belonged  to  her  gov 
erness,  who  had  received  it  of  the  Empress  of  Russia.  And  in 
taking  it  off  to  give  to  the  Prince,  she  read  tor  the  first  time  on  the 
inside  the  inscription,  '  Empress  of  Russia.'  " 


WEEKLY    KINGS. 

"  All  that  has  been  related  of  Athenian  extravagance,  and  of 
the  forms  of  Athenian  jewelry,  applies  as  correctly  to  that  of  the 
Roman  people  under  the  Emperors  ;  one  of  the  latest  of  whom, 
Heliogabalus,  resolving  to  outdo  the  weekly  rings  of  the  satirist, 
never  wore  the  same  dress  or  jewel  twice.  Inscriptions  upon  the 
ring  itself,  as  well  as  upon  the  inlaid  stone,  now  frequently  occur, 
and  the  rings  fashionable  under  the  decline  and  fall  of  the  Roman 
Empire  increased  in  elaboration,  size  and  number,  till,  as  frequently 
happens  in  the  records  of  folly,  one  excess  counterbalanced  the 
other,  and  it  only  became  a  question  of  caprice  whether  the  Latin 
exquisite  would  burden  himself  with  one  gold  ring  of  twenty  ounces 
weight  (Troy),  or  twenty  or  thirty  annuli  of  equal  costliness,  but  of 
smaller  bulk." 


EVENING   RINGS. 

"  Strict  taste  in  Paris  just  now  is  said  to  call  upon  a  gentleman 
in  evening  dress  to  wear  two  rings  on  the  little  finger  of  the  right 
hand.  There  must  not  be  less  than  two  rings  or  more,  and  no 
other  finger  than  the  one  named  may  afford  the  ornaments  a  rest 
ing  place." 


292  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

RING    THRIFT. 

"The  Whitehall  Times  tells  of  a  man  in  that  village  who  had 
the  gold  from  his  dead  wife's  teeth  made  into  an  engagement  ring 
which  he  gave  to  a  woman  whom  he  was  about  to  marry. 

"  Miss  Emma  Nevada  received  a  bracelet  instead  of  a  ring  as  an 
engagement  pledge  from  her  fiance,  Dr.  Palmer,  who  wears  the  key 
on  a  little  gold  pin. 


"  LET    LOVE  ABIDE." 

In  the  gardens  at  Bramshill  an  ancient  wedding   ring  was  dug 
up.     The  posy  on  it,  "  Let  love  abide :" 

Do  shadows  of  the  days  of  old  still  linger  in  the  garden  ways  ? 
Long  hidden,  deep  beneath  the  mold,  they   found  a  ring   of  other 

days, 
And  faith  and  hope  and  memory  cling  about  that  simple  wedding 

ring. 

It  bears  a  posy  quaint  and  sweet,  (and  well  the  graven  letters 
wear,) 

Let  love  abide — the  words  are  met  for  those  who  pray  love's  end 
less  prayer  ; 

The  old  heart  language,  sung  or  sighed,  forever  speaks,  Let  love 
abide. 

Oh,  noble  mansion,  proud    and   old,    and   beautiful   in    shade    or 

shine, 

Age  after  age  your  wall  enfold  the  treasures  of  an  ancient  line  ! 
And  yet— let  time  make  all  the  rest,  if  love   abide,    for    love    is 

— Sarah  Doudney. 


A  trying  hour  to  hand  and  heart  ; 
She  yields  :  the  seal  is  given  ; 
United  they,  till  death  them  part 
May  they  be  one  in  heaven. 


ESPOUSAL.  203 

THE    PRINCE   AND   THE    RING. 

"  There  was  an  Oriental  Prince  who  once  sent  a  love  present  to 
his  betrothed,  and  when  she  opened  the  love  present  to  her  surprise 
it  was  an  iron  egg — an  ugly,  rough,  iron  egg — and  so  she  dashed 
it  upon  the  ground,  feeling  angry  that  her  prince  should  send  such 
a  thing  as  that.  But  as  it  fell  on  the  ground  the  egg  opened,  and 
out  of  the  egg  came  a  silver  yolk,  and  on  examining  the  silver  yolk- 
it  also  opened,  and  out  of  the  silver  yolk  there  came  a  ruby  crown, 
and  on  examining  the  ruby  crown  curiously  it  opened,  and  out  of 
the  ruby  crown  there  came  a  diamond  ring,  and  that  was  the  token 
of  love." 

That  iron  egg  is  law — legal  restraint — the  holy  commandment, 
stern  and  dreadful  to  the  sinner  in  his  sins.  It  arrests,  arraigns, 
convinces  and  condemns.  That  silver  yolk  is  the  benevolent  de 
sign  or  goodness  hid  in  law.  "  Wherefore  the  law  is  holy,  just  and 
good."  A  thorn  hedge  is  good  if  it  keeps  you  out  of  the  ditch,  or 
prevents  the  penalty  of  trespass.  That  ruby  crown  is  Gospel — the 
fulfilment  and  consummation  of  law — the  truth  and  grace  that  came 
by  Jesus  Christ.  And  that  diamond  ring  is  the  covenant  of  love 
that  God  makes  through  Christ  with  his  chosen  people. 

"  Bring  hither  the  best  robe  and  put  it  on  him,  and  put  a  ring 
upon  his  finger  and  shoes  on  his  feet." — Testament. 

VgN  («\ 

*&>'  ^j-,, 

THE   LOST    RING. 

Deep  down  in  the  slush  of  the  city 

Fell  a  ring  from  a  proud  lady's  finger  • 

With  solicitude,  moving  to  pity, 

As  chained  to  the  spot  she  did  linger. 

Down  stooping,  (it  seemed  but  in  vain, 
While  by-standers  loudly  did  mutter,) 

She  braved  mingled  comment  an  rain 
And  plunged  her  fair  hand  in  the  gutter. 


294  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

Of  naught  did  she  think  but  her  pearl, 
And  her  gold  of  the  seventh  refining, 

A  jewel  once  fit  for  an  Earl, 

For  a  moment  obscured  in  its  shining. 

She  searched  there  asjain  and  a^ain. 

o  J*> 

Consulting  no  spectator's  pleasure  ; 
And  now  as  reward  for  her  pain, 

She  drew  forth  her  beautiful  treasure. 

On  tissue  of  silk,  and  with  care, 

She  wiped  it  and  brought  forth  its  brightness  ; 
When  it  shone  with  a  light  heaven-fair, 

Like  the  wing  of  a  seraphin  whiteness. 

The  vulgar  now  ceased  their  vile  scorn, 
Ashamed  as  they  saw  her  rewarded  : 

But  with  trophy  triumphantly  borne, 
She  left  the  low  horde  unregarded. 

o 

The  moral  is  clear  to  you  all, 

The  reader  can  make  th1  application  ; 

The  ring — is  the  soul  since  the  fall, 
That  gutter  is  Sin's  degradation. 

There  arc  spirits  degraded  and  low, 
Deep  sunk  in  corruption's  own  mire, 

That  may  rise  yet  as  stars  set  to  glow 
And  to  sparkle  like  jewels  on  fire. 

And  Christ  is  "the  Arm  of  the  Lord 
Made  bare  "  for  our  grand  restoration  ; 

He  picks  up  the  lost  by  His  Word, 

And  counts  them  the  gems  of  salvation. 


Aki  (Greek  for  "  always.") 

A  heart  content,  Can  ne'er  repent. 


ESPOUSAL.  295 

All  I  refuse,  And  thce  I  choose. 
All  for  all. 
Bear  and  forbear. 

Beyond  this  life,  Love  me  dear  wife. 
De  bon  cur  (Found  at  York). 
Death  never  parts  Such  loving  hearts. 
Dien  vous  garde. 

Endless  my  love,  As  this  shall  prove. 
Forever  and  for  aye. 
God  alone,  Made  us  two  one. 
God  did  decree,  This  unity. 

God  tend  me  well  to  keep. —  The  ring  given  by  Henry    VIII.  ic 
Anne  of  Cleves. 

Got  bwar  iins  beid,  In  leib  and  leid  (With  clasped  hands,  &c.) 

Heart  and  hand,  At  thy  command. 

I  have  obtained,  Whom  God  ordained. 

In  love  abide,  Till  death  divide. 

In  loving  thee,  I  love  myself. 

In  thee  my  choice,  I  do  rejoice. 

In  unity,  Let's  live  and  die. 

Joy  be  with  you. 

Le  cuer  ke  my  (Fifteenth  Century,  with  Virgin  and  Child.) 

Let  love  increase. 

Let  reason  rule. 

Let  us  love,  Like  turtle  dove. 

Live  to  love,  love  to  live. 

Live  happy. 

Love  for  love. 

Love  alway,  By  night  and  clay. 

Love  and  respect,  I  do  expect. 

Love  is  heaven,  and  heaven  is  love. 


296  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

Love  me  and  leave  me  not. 
May  God  above  Increase  our  love. 
May  you  live  long. 
Mizpch  (/'.  e.  watch-tower.; 
My  heart  and  I,  Until  I  die. 

My  willc  were  (Gold  signet-ring,  with  cradle  as  device.) 
Never  ncwe,  (Alianour,  wife  of  the  Duke  of  Somerset.) 
No  gift  can  shew,  The  love  I  owe. 
Not  two  but  one,  Till  life  is  done. 
Post  spinas  palma. 
Pray  to  love,  and  love  to  pray. 

Quod  dens  conjunst  homo  non  scparet  (Sixteenth  century,   G.    II. 
Ci lover,  Esq.) 

Silence  ends  strife,  With  man  and  wife 

'  Tccta    legc,    Lccta    tege,    (Ring    of   Matthew    Pi.ris  ;     found    at 
Hereford. 

Till  death  us  depart,  (Margaret,  wife  of  the  Earl  of  Shrewsbury. 

Till  my  life's  ende,  (Elizabeth,  wife  of  Lord  Latymcr.) 

To  enjoy  is  to  obey. 

Tout  pour  rous,  (Fifteenth  century,  with  St.  Christopher.) 

Treu  and  fcst. 

True  love,  Will  ne'er  remove. 

We  join  our  love  In  God  above. 

Wedlock,  'tis  said,  In  heaven  is  made. 

Where  this  I  give,   I  wish  to  live. 

When  this  you  sec,  Remember  me. 

Where  hearts  agree,  There  God  will  be, 

Your's  in  heart  —Dr.  Rrewer. 


ESPOUSAL.  297 

DAME    LIONES'    RING. 

A  ring  was  given  by  Dame  Liones  to  Sir  Garcth  during  a  tour 
nament.  "That  ring,"  said  Dame  Liones,"  increaseth  my  beauty 
more  than  it  is  of  itself;  and  this  is  the  virtue  of  my  ring:  That 
which  is  green  it  will  turn  to  red,  and  that  which  is  red  it  will  turn 
green  ;  that  which  is  blue  it  will  turn  white,  and  that  which  is  white 
it  will  turn  blue,  and  so  with  other  colors.  Also  who  beareth  my 
ring  can  never  lose  blood. — Sir.  T.  JMalroys  History  of  Prince 
Arthur. 

CORCUn's    RING. 

This  legendary  ring  was  composed  of  six  different  metals.  It 
ensured  the  wearer  success  in  any  undertaking  in  which  he  chose 
to  embark.  "  While  you  have  it  on  your  finger,'  said  the  old  man, 
<l  misfortune  shall  fly  from  you  house,  and  nobody  shall  be  able  to 
hurt  you  :  but  one  condition  is  attached  to  the  gift,  which  is  this  : 
when  you  have  chosen  for  yourself  a  wife,  you  must  remain  faithful 
to  her  as  long  as  she  lives.  The  moment  you  neglect  her  for  an 
other  you  will  lose  the  ring. —  T.  S.  Gnculettes  .Chinese  Tales,  1723. 


THE    VIRGIN'S    WEDDING    RING. 

There  is  a  ring,  kept  in  the  Duomo  of  Perugia,  said  to  have 
Deen  given  to  the  Virgin  Mary  on  her  betrothal  to  Joseph,  which  is 
carefully  kept  under  no  less  than  fourteen  locks. 


BLUSHING. 


T  IIATIJ  been  observed  that  in  anger  the  eyes  wax  red, 
and  in  blushing,  not  the  eyes,  but  the  ears  and  the 
parts  behind  them.  The  cause  is,  that  in  anger  the 
spirits  ascend  and  wax  eager,  which  is  most  easily  seen 
in  the  eyes,  because  they  are  translucent,  though  withal  it 
makcth  both  the  cheeks  and  gills  red.  But  in  blushing  it  is 
true  that  the  spirits  ascend  likewise  to  succor  both  the  eyes  and  the 
face,  which  are  parts  that  labor  ;  but  then  they  are  repulsed  by  the 
eyes,  for  that  the  eyes  in  shame  do  put  back  the  spirits  that  ascend 
to  them,  as  unwilling  to  look  abroad.  For  no  man  in  that  fashion 
doth  look  strongly,  but  dejectedly,  and  that  repulsion  from  the  eyes 
diverteth  the  spirits  and  heat  more  to  the  ears  and  the  parts  be 
hind  them.  —  Bacon. 

Among  the  Grecians  the  bride  was  usually  conducted  in  a  char 
iot  from  her  father's  house  in  the  evening  to  conceal  her  blushes. 


THE    ROSY   BLUSH    OF    HONEST   LOVE. 

"  Zeno  was  told  that  it  was  disreputable  for  a  philosopher  to  be 
in  love.  '  If  that  were  true/  said  the  wise  man,  '  the  fair  sex  are 
indeed  to  be  pitied  ;  for  they  would  then  receive  the  attention  of 

fools  alone.'  " 

cos 


ESPOUSAL.  299 

Why  should  I  blush  to  own  I  love  ? 
'Tis  love  that  rules  the  realms  above. 
Why  should  I  blush  to  say  to  all, 
That  virtue  holds  my  heart  in  thrall  ? 

Why  should  I  seek  the  thickest  shade, 
Lest  love's  dear  secret  be  betrayed  ? 
Why  the  stern  brow,  deceitful  move, 
When  I  am  languishing  with  love  ? 

Is  it  weakness  thus  to  dwell 
On  passion  that  I  dare  not  tell  ? 
Such  weakness  I  \vould  ever  prove  — 
'Tis  painful,  though  'tis  sweet,  to  love. 

—  Kirke    White. 

*          Clear  Chastity, 

With  reddening  blushes  as  she  moves  along, 
Disordered  at  the  deep  regard  she  draws. 

—  Thompson. 


O  love  !  when  womanhood  is  in  the  flush, 
And  man's  a  young  and  an  unspotted  thing, 

His  first  breathed  word,  and  her  half-conscious  blush, 
Are  fair  as  light  of  heaven,  or  flowers  in  spring. 


—  Allan  Cunningham. 


Let  me  forever  gaze 

And  bless  the  new-born  glories  that  adorn  thee ; 
From  every  blush  that  kindles  in  thy  cheeks, 
Ten  thousand  little  loves  and  graces  spring. 

— Rcnvc. 


PROPOSAL   AND    ESPOUSAL. 

"  A    BLUSH    IS   THE   CREAM    OF    MODESTY." 
The  blushing  cheek  speaks  modest  mind, 
The  lips  befitting  words  most  kind, 
The  eye  doth  tempt  to  love's  desire, 
And  seems  to  say,  "  Tis  Cupid's  fire." 

—  Harrington. 

—  «Oc^C>^C  ;,;-*>,<>  -- 

The  blush  is  Nature's  alarm  at  the  approach  of  sin  —  and  her 
testimony  to  the  dignity  of  virtue.  —  Fuller. 

O  Lord,  I  am  ashamed,  and  blush  to  lift  up  my  face   to  Thee, 

my  God.  —  Ezra. 

^-  --  +  ---  g  --  .+.  —  j^ 

BLUSHING    NOT    ALWAYS    A   CRITERION    OF    TRUTH. 

"There  is  beauty  in  the  blush  of  a  rose,  and  there  is  beauty  of 
a  higher  character  in  the  blush  that  mantles  the  cheek  of  modesty, 
and  yet  there  may  be  just  as  little  of  loyalty  to  God  in  the  living 
as  in  the  inanimate  object." 


That  holy  shame,  which  ne'er  forgets 
What  clear  renown  —  it  used  to  wear  ; 
Whose  blush  remains,  when  Virtue  sets, 
To  show  her  sunshine  —  has  been  there." 


"A  flush, 

(As  shame,  deep  shame,  had  once  burnt  on  her  ckeek, 
Then  lingered  there  forever)  looked  like  health. 
Offering  hope,  vain  hope,  to  the  pale  lip  ; 
Like  the  rich  crimson  of  the  evening  sky, 
Brightest  when  night  is  coming." 

They  were  not  at  all  ashamed,  neither  could  they  blush.  —  Lille. 
"  When  the  heart  is  past  hope,  the  face  is  past  shame." 


ESPOUSAL.  301 

THE    COLOR     OF     BLUSHES. 

Take  courage,  that  is  the  color  of  virtue.  —  Diogenes  to  blushing 
Student. 

Swarthy  nations  blush  white. 

Tell  an  Arab  lady  that  she  is  as  beautiful  as  a  camel,  and  her 
skin  will  tinge  with  an  approving  blush. 

Tertullian  makes  himself  very  merry  with  those  that  pretend  to 
be  Christians,  iand  call  for  a  bodkin  to  dress  their  hair,  and  the 
blushes  of  such  a  paper  to  beautify  their  complexion. 

I  like  her  not  ;  she  is  a  fair  craft  sailing  under  false  colors.— 
Sailor  speaking  of  a  noted  beauty. 

"  A  female,  praising  the  beautiful  color  used  by  the  artist  on  her 
miniature,  was  told  by  him  that  he  did  not  doubt  she  was  a  woman 
of  good  taste  ;  for  they  both  bought  their  rouge  at  the  same  shop." 


NO    BLUSHING   IN    PARAt)ISE. 

Into  this  paradise  of  pleasure  the  Lord  God  conducted  our  first 
parents  ;  who,  at  this  time  were  naked  and  yet  not  ashamed,  be 
cause  their  innocence  was  their  protection.  They  had  no  sinful 
inclinations  in  their  bodies,  no  evil  consciences  in  their  minds,  to 
make  them,  blush  :  and.  withal,  the  temperature  of  the  climate  was 
such  as  need  no  clothing  to  defend  them  from  the  weather.  God 
having  given  them  (as  we  may  imagine)  a  survey  of  their  new  habi 
tation,  shown  them  the  various  beauties  of  the  place,  the  work 
wherein  they  were  to  employ  themselves  by  day,  and  the  bower 
wherein  they  were  to  repose  by  night.  —  Stackhouse. 


WEDDING     CHEER. 

« 

THE    CONSCIOUS    WATER    SAW    ITS    LORD    AND    BLUSHED. 


n    ;XD   the  third  clay  there  was  a  marriage  in  Cana  of  Gali- 
•••llXlt     lee  ;  and  the  mother  of  Jesus  was  there. 

^\ ''  jjr- *'.$?* 

And  both  Jesus  was  called,  and    his   disciples   to  the 
Cr^      marriage. 

And  when  they   wanted   wine,    the    mother   of  Jesus 
saith  unto  him,  The}-  have  no  wine. 

Jesus  saith  unto  her,  Woman  what  have  I  to  do  with  thee  ? 
mine  hour  is  not  yet  come. 

His  mother  saith  unto  the  servants,  Whatsoever  he  saith  unto 
you,  do  it. 

And  there  were  set  there  six  watcrpots  of  stone,  after  the  man 
ner  of  the  purifying  of  the  Jews,  containing  two  or  three  firkins 
apiece. 

Jesus  saith  unto  them,  Fill  the  watcrpots  with  water.  And  they 
filled  them  up  to  the  brim. 

And  he  saith  unto  them,  Draw  out  now,  and  bear  unto  the 
governor  of  the  feast.  And  they  bear  it. 

When  the  ruler  of  the  feast  had  tasted  the  water  that  was  made 
wine,  and  knew  not  whence  it  was  ;  (but  the  servants  which  drew 
the  water  knew)  ;  the  governor  of  the  feast  called  the  bridegroom. 

802 


ESPOUSAL.  303 

And  saith  unto  him,  Every  man  at  the  beginning  doth  set  forth 
good  wine  ;  and  when  men  have  well  drunk,  then  that  which  is 
worse,  but  thou  hast  kept  the  good  wine  until  now, 


"  They  have  no  wine,"  she  said, 

The  mother  of  our  Lord  ; 
And  scant  the  feast  outspread 
Upon  a  wincless  board. 

For  wine,  'tis  said,  doth  cheer 
The  heart  of  God  and  man  ; 

The  grape's  enlivening  "tear" 
On  Jewish  altars  ran. 

A  drink  offering  most  meet 
Prepared  for  God  above, 

The  cluster's  blessing  sweet, 
The  churches'  cup  of  love. 

Then  let  thy  bounty  deign 
The  needed  festal  cheer  ; 

Nor  poverty  complain 

Of  want,  while  thou  art  near. 

"Oh  !  woman,  what  have  I," 
He  said,  "  to  do  with  thee  ; 

Should  miracle  supply 
E'en  vinous  luxury  ? 

Shall  need  so  trivial  dare 
Demand  divine  display, 

Or  ask  angelic  fare 

To  grace  a  wedding  day? 

Did  I  for  this  come  forth 

Endued  with  heavenly  might, 

To  aid  convivial  mirth, 

And  crown  the  nuptial  rite?': 


304  PROPOSAL   AND    ESPOUSAL. 

Thus  Jesus  tries  her  faith  : 
The  Master  seems  austere — 

As  when  of  old  He  saith, 

"  Shal!  dogs  eat  children's  fare  ?" 

But  grace  cannot  say  nay, 
The  bounty  surely  comes  ; 

None  empty  go  away  : 

E'en  dogs  may  eat  the  crumbs. 

Our  Saviour  still  doth  bless 
The  portion  of  His  saints, 

Doth  all  their  griefs  redress, 
And  banish  their  complaints. 

And  she  who  knows  His  love 
Is  equal  to  His  power 

Stands  waiting  now  to  prove 
Messiah's  primal  hour. 

And  turning  to  the  guests, 
With  admonition  true, 

She  earnestly  requests 

That  what  He  bids  they'll  do. 

"The  vessels  fill,"  he  cries, 
"  Up  to  the  flowing  brim  ;" 

With  wonder  and  surprise, 
They  gladly  wait  on  Him. 

His  word  and  work  are  one : 
Behold  the  empurpling  sign  -, 

every  urn  doth  run 
A  fountain  of  red  wine. 


ESPOUSAL. 

Thus,  men  must  do  His  will, 
If  they  his  grace  would  prove, 

For  earthly  labor  still 

Must  wait  on  heavenly  love. 

The  slothful  ne'er  may  know 
What  good  in  action  lies, 

Nor  how  through  duties  flow 
The  wines  of  Paradise. 

Yon  runner  waxeth  warm, 
Increasing  heat  with  speed  ; 

And  harvests  golden  charm 

Must  wave  from  plenteous  seed. 

The  soul,  like  rising  tide, 
Doth  find  in  motion  rest, 

And  halcyon-like  doth  ride 
On  billow's  heavine  breast. 


The  sea's  unceasing  roll 
Preserves  his  waters  pure  ; 

While  summer-sleeping  pool 
Breeds  dull  stagnation,  sure. 

Those  fowl  ne'er  cl'mb  the  sky 
Who  feed  on  grosser  food  ; 

The  wings  that  highest  fiy 

Are  warmed  with  richest  blood. 

Rewrard  comes  after  task, 
'Tis  work,  and  work  alone, 

Can  turn  to  vinous  cask 
Rude  waterpots  of  stone. 


PROPOSAL    AND    ESPOUSAL. 

"Draw  out,"  He  says,  "and  bear 
To  th'  governor  of  the  feast  : 

Let  all  the  guests  have  share, 
From  th'     reatest  to  the  least. 


Around  from  cup  to  cup 
The  heavenly  liquor  flows  ; 

Till  all,  rejoicing,  sup, 
And  every  bosom  glows. 

Oh  !  viand  exquisite, 

Oh  !   more  than  palace  cheer, 
What  words  can  thee  bent  ? 

A  God-like  chalice  here. 

No  deleterious  draft, 

No  questionable  boon, 
Was  ere  from  mercy  quaffed 

Since  rolled  the  sun  and  moon. 

The  governor,  with  joy, 

Partakes  the  gift  divine  : 
(That  good  can  never  cloy 

Where  heaven  and  earth  combined 

"Of  wines,  men  at  the  first," 
Saith  he,  "  set  forth  the  good— 

When  men  have  drunk,  the  worst  : 
(Dull  taste  hath  merriest  mood.) 

But  nobler  than  the  rest  — 

And  far  more  generous  —  thou, 

Of  wines  hast  kept  the  best 
And  choicest  until  now." 


ESPOUSAL.  307 


Thou  stem  of  Jesse's  rod, 

This  lesson  now  make  mine  ; 

All  duties  done  to  God, 
Turn  water  into  wine. 


CHRIST 


AT     THE     WEDDING. — (FOR     THOSE    ABOUT    TO    MARRY.) 


The  first  public  miracle  graceth  a  marriage.  It  is  an  ancient 
and  laudable  institution,  that  the  rites  of  matrimony  should  not  want 
a  solemn  celebration.  When  are  feasts  in  season,  if  not  at  the  re 
covery  of  our  lost  rib  ?  if  not  at  this  main  change  of  our  estate 
wherein  the  joy  of  obtaining  meets  with  the  hope  of  further  com 
forts.  The  Son  of  the  Virgin  and  the  mother  of  that  Son  are  both 
present  at  a  wedding.  It  was  in  all  likelihood  some  of  their  kin 
dred  to  whose  nuptial  feast  they  were  invited  so  far,  yet  it  was  more 
the  honor  of  the  act  than  of  the  person  that  Christ  intended.  He 
that  made  the  first  marriage  in  Paradise  (and  doubtless  the  same 
blessed  Second  Person  in  the  Trinity  gave  Eve  to  Adam)  bestows 
His  first  miracle  upon  a  Galilean  marriage.  He  that  was  the  author 
of  matrimony,  and  sanctified  it,  doth  by  His  holy  presence  honor 
the  resemblance  of  His  eternal  union  with  His  church.  How  boldly 
may  we  spit  in  the  faces  of  all  impure  adversaries  of  wedlock  when 
the  Son  of  God  pleases  to  honor  it. 

(God  turns  the  key  in  wedlock's  gate 

And  guards  it  with  His  thunder  ; 
What  God  hath  joined,  O  blest  estate  ! 

Let  no  man  put  asunder.) 

The  glorious  bridegroom  of  the  church  knew  well  how  ready 
men  would  be  to  place  shame  even  in  the  most  lawful  conjunctions, 
and  therefore  his  first  work  shall  be  to  countenance  his  own  ordi 
nance.  Happy  is  that  wedding  where  Christ  is  a  guest.  Oh  ! 


PROPOSAL   AND    ESPOUSAL. 

Saviour,  those  that  marry  in  Thee,  cannot  marry  without  Thee. 
There  is  no  holy  marriage  where  thou  art  not,  however  invisible, 
yet  surely  present  by  thy  spirit  and  benediction.— Hall's  Contem 
plations,  1664. 


THE    GOVERNOR    AND    ETIQUETTE    OF    MARRIAGE    FEASTS. 

'At  nuptial  feasts  there  were  guests  of  two  sorts  :  first,  those 
that  had  been  invited,  and.  secondly,  those  that  came  of  their  own 
accord,  and  who  were  expected  to  bring  presents. 

The  Jewish  nuptial  feasts  continued  seven  or  eight  clays  (Gen. 
xxviii.  29  ;  Judges  xiv.  14).  What  is  here  related  of  the  wine  fall 
ing  short,  may  therefore  be  understood  as  of  the  fifth,  sixth  or 
seventh  day,  for  it  is  scarcely  probable  that  such  a  deficiency  should 
have  occurred  much  sooner.  It  seems  to  have  been  occasioned  by 
the  unexpected  arrival  of  Jesus  and  his  disciples  ;  Jesus  being  in 
vited  as  being  jn  the  neighborhood,  probably  not  as  a  prophet,  but 
as  a  countryman,  relation  and  acquaintance.  The  idea  of  a  rela 
tionship  arises  from  the  circumstance  of  Mary  being  so  much  con 
cerned  about  procuring  the  supply  of  wine,  and  also  because,  when 
the  feast  was  over,  Jesus  went  down  to  Capernum  with  his  brethren 
and  relations,  who  where  distinct  from  his  disciples  (Matthew  ii.  12) 
from  which  it  would  seem  that  they  all  came  together,  as  parties 
interested  in  this  marriage. 


The  waterpots  were  there  that  the  Jews  might  wash  their  hands 
before  they  made  their  meal,  which  is  still  their  practice. 

*  *  •:>  *  * 

Bishop  Cumberland  estimates  the  firkin  at  a  gallon.  Some, 
however,  consider  this  measure  to  be  the  same  that  is  in  the  Old 
Testament  called  the  bath,  which  some  say  held  seven  gallons  and 


ESPOUSAL.  309 

a  half,  and  others,  only  four  and  a  half.       There  is  some  difficulty 
in  exactly  reckoning  the  measures  of  the  ancients. 

#  *  *  #  * 

Dr.  E  D.  Clark,  the  traveller,  makes  an  interesting  observation 
on  Cana.  He  says,  '  It  is  worthy  of  note,  that  walking-  among  the 
ruins  of  a  church  we  saw  large,  massy  stone  pots,  answering  the 
description  given  of  the  ancient  vessels  of  the  country,  not  preserved 
and  exhibited  as  religious  relics,  but  lying  about,  disregarded  by 
the  present  inhabitants  as  antiquities  with  whose  original  use  they 
were  unacquainted.  From  their  appearance  and  the  number  of 
them,  it  was  quite  evident  that  a  practice  of  keeping  water  in  large 
stone  pots,  each  holding  from  eighteen  to  twenty-seven  gallons  was 
once  common  in  the  country. 

*  *  *  *  ,:-. 

The  governor  of  the  feast  among  the  Jews  blessed  the  cup,  and 
then  sent  it  round  among  the  guests.  The  Greeks  had  such  an 
officer  ;  and  it  is  thought  that  from  them  the  example  was  copied 
by  the  Jews.  He  was  chosen  from  one  of  the  most  agreeable  of 
the  guests,  and  his  duty  was  to  taste  the  wine,  and  watch  the  guests 
so  that  if  any  of  them  began  to  be  intoxicated,  he  was  to  prevent 
its  progress  by  diluting  the  liquor  for  them  as  it  was  sent  around. 
The  Greeks  called  him  the  Symposiarch. — Pictorial  Explanatory 
New  Testament. 

When  the  Almighty  deigns  His  favors  in  providence  or  grace, 
He  does  not  give  like  a  man,  by  measure,  or  by  stint,  and  limit 
himself  to  a  precise  quantity  for  bestowal,  but  He  gives  like  a  God, 
and  makes  our  cup  to  run  over.  Even  as  it  was  said  of  Alexander 
that  he  gave  like  a  king,  an  ass'  load  of  gold,  or  five  hundred 
weight  of  frankincense  (very  precious)  at  one  time  ;  or  as  the  mon- 
archs  of  old,  sometimes  made  wine  to  run  down  the  streets  on.  the 
day  of  their  coronation,  to  show  the  abundance  of  the  royal 
resources. 


3IQ  PROPOSAL   AND    ESPOUSAL. 

1  And  we  cannot  charge  the  providence  of  God  with  being  in 
strumental  to  all  the  gluttony  and  drunkenness  which  is  committed 
in  the  world,  merely  because  He  affords  that  meat  and  drink  which 
men  of  immoderate  appetites  abuse  to  excess." 

"  It  is  a  high  commendation  of  providence  that  it  crowns  us 
with  plenty  (whatsoever  use  we  make  of  it)  and  bestows  upon  us 
richly  all  things  to  enjoy,  (and  who  can  number  the  clouds  in  wis 
dom  or  stay  the  bottles  of  heaven).  So  it  was  not  unbecoming  a 
person  invested  with  a  divine  commission  to  give  on  this  occasion 
an  eminent  instance  of  his  flowing  liberality,  and  by  his  gracious 
providence  for  the  family  to  leave  a  grateful  memorial  behind  of 
his  benevolent  regard  to  the  persons  that  very  likely,  were  his 
relatives  and  had  just  entered  into  the  honorable  estate  of 
matrimony." 

1  Among  the  Jews  there  was  always  the  greatest  decency  and 
sobriety  imaginable,  observed  in  the  celebration  of  their  marriages. 
To  this  purpose  a  governor  of  the  feast  (as  some  say  of  the  sacer 
dotal  race)  was  always  chosen,  whose  office  it  was  to  have  supcrin- 
tcndcncy  of  the  dishes  and  wine,  and  to  oblige  the  guests  to 
observe  all  the  decorums  that  religion  required,  and  not  only  so, 
but  other  persons,  at  this  time  were  Likewise  appointed  to  break- 
glass  vessels,  as  a  common  signal  to  give  the  company  notice  that 
they  had  already  drunk  enough  and  were  not  permitted  to  run  to 
excess." 

"  The  question,  what  have  I  to  do  with  thec  ?  or  what  is  it  to 
you  and  me  ?  The  care  of  providing  wine  on  this  occasion,  docs 
not  properly  belong  to  you  and  me  :  but,  admitting  it  did,  my  hour 
is  not  come.  It  is  too  soon  as  yet  to  set  about  it,  because  it  is 
highly  fitting  that  the  necessity  of  that  supernatural  supply  which 
I  intend  them,  should  be  a  little  more  felt  in  order  to  recommend 
the  benefit  itself,  and  to  give  the  manner  of  attaining  it,  a  power  of 
making  a  deeper  impression  on  their  minds." 


ESPOUSAL.  3 !  1 

'•But  what  is  this  I  hear?  A  sharp  answer  to  the  suit  of  a 
mother?  Oh  woman  what  have  I  to  do  with  thec  ?  lie  whose 
sweet  mildness  and  mercy  never  sent  away  any  suppliant  discon 
tented,  doth  he  only  frown  upon  her  that  bare  him?  lie  that 
commands  us  to  honor  father  and  mother,  doth  he  disdain  her 
whose  flesh  he  took?  God  forbid  :  love  and  duty  doth  not  exempt 
parents  from  due  admonition.  She  solicited  Christ  as  a  mother, 
He  answers  her  as  a  woman.  If  she  were  the  mother  of  his  flesh, 
his  deity  was  eternal.  She  might  not  so  remember  herself  to  be  a 
mother,  that  she  should  forget  she  was  a  woman,  nor  so  look  upon 
him  as  a  son,  that  she  should  not  regard  him  as  a  God.  He  was 
so  obedient  to  her  as  a  mother,  that  withal  she  must  obey  him  as 
her  God.  That  part  which  he  took  from  her  shall  observe  her  ; 
she  must  observe  that  nature  which  came  from  above,  and  made 
her  both  a  woman  and  a  mother.  Matter  of  miracle  concerned  the 
Godhead  only  ;  supernatural  things  were  above  the  sphere  of 
fleshly  relation.  If  now  the  blessed  Virgin  will  be  prescribing 
either  time  or  form  into  Divine  acts,  O  woman,  what  have  I  to  do 
with  thcc?  my  hour  is  not  come.  In  all  bodily  actions  his  style 
was,  O  mother  :  in  spiritual  and  heavenly,  O  woman.  Neither  is 
it  for  us  in  the  holy  affairs  of  God  to  know  any  faces  ;  yea,  if  we 
have  known  Christ  heretofore  according  to  the  flesh,  henceforth 
know  we  him  so  no  more. 

"O  Blessed  Virgin,  if  in  that  heavenly  glory  wherein  thou  art 
thou  canst  take  notice  of  these  earthly  things,  with  what  indigna 
tion  dost  thou  look  upon  the  presumptous  superstition  of  vain  men, 
whose  suits  make  thee  more  than  a  solicitor  of  Divine  favors? 
Thy  humanity  is  not  lost  in  thy  motherhood,  nor  in  thy  glory. 
The  respects  of  nature  reach  not  so  high  as  Heaven.  It  is  far  from 
thee  to  abide  that  honor  which  is  stolen  from  thy  Redeemer. 

"  There  is  a  marriage  whereto  we  are  invited  ,  yea  wherein  we 
are  already  interested,  not  as  the  guests  only,  but  as  the  bride  ;  in 


312  PROPOSAL   AND    ESPOUSAL. 

which  there  shall  be  no  want  of  the  wine  of  gladness.  It  is  a  mar 
vel  if  in  these  earthly  banquets  there  be  not  some  lack.  In  thy 
presence,  O  Saviour,  there  is  fulness  of  joy,  and  at  thy  right  hand 
arc  pleasures  for  evcrmoic.  Blessed  are  they  that  arc  called  to 
the  marriage  supper  of  the  lamb." 


TIII-:  i;i-:sT  WINK  LAST. 

So  Cana  said  :  but  still  the  first  was 

For  skilful  nature  wrought  her  very  best  ; 

Turning  the  sunshine  into  hues  of  blood, 
Bringing  the  ripened  clusters  to  be  pressed. 

The  good,  the  better,  and   tlv:  last  the  best, 
This  is  the  order  of  the  Masters  wine  ; 

Mere  than  the  yesterdays  to-day's  are  blest, 
And  life's  to-inorro\\s  may  be  more  divine. 

We  "bid"  thcc,  master,  come  and  be  our  guest 
Life's  common  things  thou  turnest  into  wine  ; 

Our  cares,  our  woes,  our  bitter  tears  are  blest, 
If  only  thou  dost  "  cause  thy  face  to'  shine." 

—  Good  Words. 

— -t-CJ.  jOV-— 

"  The  love  of  the  world  in  its  commencement  is  sweet,  but  in 
the  end  bitter;  the  love  of  God  at  first  appears  bitter;  but  in  the 
end  it  becomes  sweet.  This  is  proved  to  us  in  a  remarkable  man 
ner  by  the  evangelist's  account  of  the  marriage  feast  at  Cana,  where 
it  is  said,  '  Kvcry  man  at  the  beginning  doth  set  forth  good  wine, 
and  when  men  have  well  drunk,  then  that  which  is  worse  ;  but 
thou  hast  kept  the  good  wine  until  now.'  The  natural  man  first 
imbibes  the  good  wine— that  is  to  say,  he  is  dazzled  by  the  deceit- 


ESPOUSAL. 


313 


ful  sweetness  of  earthly  pleasures  ;  when  these  false  desires  have 
made  him  drunken,  then  must  he  drink  the  bad — conscience  and 
its  sting-  approaches.  But  Jesus  keeps  the  good  wine  until  the 
end.  Will  he  satisfy  a  soul  with  his  love — he  first  permits  it  to 
undergo  sorrow  and  suffering,  that  the  gracious  draught  may  be  so 
much  the  more  refreshing  and  the  sweeter. — Hildebert,  Archbishop 
of  Tours,  1185. 

«-o3@*o-i 

GREAT    PERSONAGES    AT    MARRIAGE    FEASTS. 

''Christ  himself,  in  Cana  of  Galilee,  honored  marriage  with  his 
own  presence.  It  is  a  custom  among  men  to  grace  their  feasts  and 
solemn  meeting  with  the  presence  of  high  personages.  Absalom 
invited  the  king  unto  his  house.  The  prophets  of  God  in  former 
ages  were  of  such  account  that  noble  men,  yea  princes,  thought 
themselves  honored  by  their  presence.  Naaman,  a  great  man,  and 
honored  in  the  Syrian  court,  waited  with  his  horses  and  chariots  at 
the  door  of  Elisha  ;  and  yet  could  not  speak  with  him  in  person, 
but  was  answered  by  a  messenger.  Saul  intreated  Samuel  to  honor 
him  with  his  company.  If  these  prophets  were  a  countenance  and 
honor  unto  persons  ot  so  high  estate,  what  then  is  Christ,  whose 
shoe  lachet  John  the  Baptist,  who  was  more  than  a  prophet,  was 
not  worthy  to  untie?  Nay,  more  than  that,  it  pleased  Christ  to  do 
the  greater  honor  unto  the  marriage,  to  show  forth  there  the  first 
fruits  of  his  Godhead  ;  he  graced  the  bridegroom  with  the  Jiaiisell 
of  his  miracles." 


CHARACTERISTIC.    WEDDINGS. 


THE    PALMER-NEVADA    WEDDING. 


RIDESMAIDS  generally  enter  behind  the  bride.  On 
this  occasion  they  preceded  her,  and  nearing  the  chan 
cel,  stepped  aside  with  their  beaux  or  garcons  aJion- 
neur,  on  whose  arms  they  leaned.  This  was  to  let  the 
bride,  when  she  came,  enter  first  within  the  railings.  The 
manoeuvre  was  prettily  executed,  and  would  have  done 
credit  to  an  operatic  performance.  This  bevy  of  bridesmaids  was 
composed  of  really  beautiful  girls  ;  but  the  two  who  held  their 
heads  easily  looked  to  the  most  advantage.  There  were  no  nod 
ding  plumes  on  the  heads  of  the  other  two,  but  one  would  fancy 
they  thought  there  were.  One  had  very  vivacious  eyes.  There 
was  something  in  their  style  of  dress  resembling  that  of  the  vestal 
virgins,  while  the  veils  were  Byzantine.  All  four  where  in  white 
from  top  to  toe,  and  owing  to  white  tulle  in  their  skirts  and  head 
gear,  looked  quite  ethereal.  They  carried  roses  in  their  hands  to 
scatter  before  the  bride  as  she  was  leaving  the  altar  with  her 
husband. 

The  bride — her  head  bore  high  wreath,  Lucia  fashion,  of  orange 
blossoms,  and  her  skirt  was  thickly  edged  to  correspond.  The 
fragrance  of  the  garniture  filled  the  church.  Her  train — so  long  ! 
so  long  ! — was  worn  gracefully.  Behind,  the  veil  was  no  shorter. 

314 


ESPOUSAL.  315 

She  was  prcllily  einue,  but  without  agitation,  and  the  eyes  expressed 
confidence  and  religious  feeling.  A  painter  who  is  doing  an  episode 
in  St.  Cecilia's  life  begged  me  to  obtain  an  invitation  for  him  to  the 
wedding,  in  hope  of  gleaning  there  something  that  would  do  in  his 
picture.  I  have  not  heard  to  what  extent  he  succeeded. — London 
Truth. 

A    DRUIDICAL    WEDDING. 

The  following  description  of  a  marriage  in  the  Druidical  days  is 
given  in  Saintine's  Myths  of  the  Rhine  : 

''At  a  place  where  two  roads  meet,  the  cracking  of  a  whip  is 
heard  ;  hogs,  sheep  and  small  oxen  are  driven  aside  to  make  way 
for  a  kind  of  procession,  consisting  of  grave  and  solemn  men  and 
women. 

It  is  a  wedding. 

Two  young  people  have  ;ust  had  '^.eir  union  blessed  by  the 
priests  under  the  sacred  oak.  The  bride  is  dressed  in  black,  and 
wears  a  wreath  of  dark  leaves  on  her  head.  She  walks  in  the  midst 
of  her  friends.  A  matron,  who  walks  on  her  left,  holds  before  her 
eyes  a  white  cloth  ;  it  is  a  shroud,  the  shroud  in  which  she  will  be 
buried  one  of  these  days.  On  her  right  a  Druid  intones  a  chant,  in 
which  he  enumerates  in  solemn  rythm  all  the  troubles  and  all  the 
anxieties  which  await  her  wedded  life. 

'From  this  day, young  wife,  thou  alone  wilt  have  to  bear  all  the 
burden  of  your  united  household. 

You  will  have  to  attend  the  baking  oven,  to  provide  fuel,  and 
to  go  in  search  of  food  ;  you  will  have  to  prepare  the  resinous  torch 
and  the  lamp. 

You  will  wash  the  linen  at  the  fountain,  and  you  will  make  up 
the  clothing. 

You  will  attend  to  the  cow,  and  even  to  the  horse  if  your  hus 
band  requires  it. 


3  1 6"  PROPOSAL   AND    ESPOUSAL. 

Always  full  of  respect,  you  will  wait  on  him,  standing  behind 
him  at  his  meals. 

If  he  expresses  a  wish  to  take  you  with  him  to  war,  you  will 
accompany  him  to  carry  his  baggage,  to  keep  his  arms  in  good 
condition,  and  to  nurse  him  if  he  should  be  sick  or  wounded. 

Happiness  consists  in  the  fulfilment  of  duty.  Be  happy,  my 
child.' 

What  is  still  more  strange  is  that   this   dolorous  weddino-  son"- 

o  o  * 

slightly  altered,  is  still  in  some  parts  of  France,  at  this  day,  ad 
dressed  to  brides  by  local  minstrels. 


•o-o«o 


MORAVIAN      MARRIAGES. 

"  \Ye  highly  reverence  marriage,  as  greatly  conducive  to  the 
kingdom  of  Christ.  But  neither  our  young  men  nor  women  enter 
into  it  till  they  assuredly  know  they  are  married  to  Christ.  When 
any  know  that  it  is  the  will  of  God  that  they  should  change  their 
state,  both  the  man  and  the  woman  arc  placed  for  a  time  with  some 
married  persons,  who  instruct  them  how  to  behave,  so  that  their 
married  life  may  be  pleasing  to  God.  Then  their  design  is  laid 
before  the  whole  church,  and  after  about  fourteen  days  they  are 
solemnly  joined,  though  not  otherwise  habited  than  they  are  at 
other  times.  If  they  make  any  entertainment,  which  is  not  always, 
they  invite  only  a  few  intimate  friends,  by  whose  faithful  admoni 
tions  they  may  be  the  better  prepared  to  bear  their  cross  and  fight 
the  good  fight  of  faith." 

QUAKER    MARRIAGES. 

Divorces  arc  actually  unknown  among  the  Quakers,  and  this 
absence  is  accounted  for  by  the  extraordinary  precautions  em 
ployed  when  two  young  persons  desire  to  be  united  in  marriage. 


ESPOUSAL. 


The  parties  place  their  proposals  of  marriage  in  a  written  form, 
which  is  referred  to  the  Society  of  which  they  are  members,  and  is 
first  acted  upon  at  a  "Preparation  Meeting"  thereof.  If  all  the 
attendant  circumstances  are  in  every  respect  in  accordance  with  the 
views  of  those  present,  the  proposal  is  approved,  and  is  then  intro 
duced  at  the  "  monthly  meeting,"  where  it  is  again  passed  upon, 
and  a  committee  of  investigation  into  the  characters,  habits  and 
circumstances  ot  the  engaged  twain  is  appointed.  These  commit 
tees  always  consists  of  two  member  of  each  sex.  The  committee, 
after  a  most  thorough  examination  and  investigation,  makes  its 
report,  generally  at  the  succeeding  "  monthly"  meeting.  This  ends 
the  preliminary  arrangements,  and  the  twain  arc  then  at  liberty  to 
proceed  in  the  accomplishment  of  their  marriage,  a  committee  of 
two  of  each  sex  being  appointed  by  the  meeting  to  see  it  orderly 
conducted,  and  the  marriage  certificate  delivered  to  the  Recorder. 
As  a  rule,  the  impressive  ceremonies  are  generally  conducted  at  the 
home  of  the  bride,  and  occasionally  in  the  "meeting  house." 
the  nuptial  ceremonies,  the  certificate  of  marriage  is  given  to  the 
couple,  which,  after  receiving  their  own  signatures,  is  in  turn  signed 
by  every  person  present,  and  frequently  contains  a  hundred  or  more 
names.  Engagement  or  wedding  rings  are  rarely  given.  —  Brooklyn 
Magazine. 

*•*•"">  j7>-» 

"CATCHING   A   TARTAR,"   OR   A   TARTARY   WEDDING. 

"  Among  the  Kirghese  the  practice  of  polygamy  obtains.     Gen 
erally  the  eldest  brother  of  a  family  has  more  than  one  wife. 
first  wife  is  mistress  of  the  household,  and   is   called  baibicJic. 
her  are  subject,  not  only  her   husband's  other  wives,  but  also  the 
other  inmates  of  the  family.     The  head  of  the  household  will  often 
send  a  portion  of  his  herd  several   hundred   miles  away  under  the 
care  of  this  wife,  while  he  himself  will  either  remain   with  his  other 
wives  about  the  grazing  ground,  or  go  and  encamp  somewhere  by 


3l8  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

himself.  In  winter  the  family  comes  together  again.  The  mani 
fold  circumstances  connected  with  marriage  among  Kirghese  are 
somewhat  formidable,  and  involve  the  payment  of  a  kaliiny  besides 
the  giving  of  various  presents.  The  affair  is  arranged  as  to  its 
preliminaries  by  matchmakers,  and  the  bridegroom  after  betrothal 
has  sometimes  to  wait  for  a  year  or  more  until  he  can  bring  the  re 
maining  portion  of  the  kahui.  If  during  this  period  the  betrothed 
girl  should  die,  her  parents  are  bound  to  give  instead  their  next 
daughter,  or  in  default,  to  return  the  kalim^  and  pay  also  a  fine  of 
one  or  two  horses  and  robes  or  furs.  So  also  is  it  if  the  girl  should 
refuse  to  marry,  which  she  may  do  on  account  of  the  ill-health,  or 
his  poverty  (in  some  localities),  her  personal  dislike.  Yet  another 
custom  is  that  if  the  bridegroom  die  or  refuse  to  marry  the  girl,  his 
parents  are  bound  to  take  her  for  their  next  son,  paying  a  fine, 
usually  a  camel,  in  case  of  refusal.  When  the  prescribed  period  of 
betrothal  is  at  an  end,  the  bridegroom,  dressed  and  mounted  at  his 
best,  goes  with  his  friends  to  the  aul  or  village  of  the  bride,  where 
the  tent  has  been  prepared  for  his  reception.  Throughout  the 
ceremonies  of  betrothal,  the  bride's  brother  has  the  right  of  pilfer 
ing  from  the  bridegroom  whatever  he  pleases  ;  but  now  the  bride's 
relations  come  and  take  as  presents  almost  everything  he  has  —  his 
coat,  hat,  girdle,  horse  and  saddle,  saying  each  one  that  they  are 
for  the  education  of  the  bride  —  a  seizure  that  is  afterwards  repaid 
by  the  relations  of  the  bridegroom  on  the  visit  to  the  home  of  the 
relations  of  the  bride." 


INDIAN    WEDDING. 

If  you  wouid  like  to  see  one  form  of  Indian  marriage  (for  all 
tribes  have  not  the  same  ceremonies,  by  any  means)  just  step 
with  me  into  this  wigwam.  There  they  stand  —  the  bridegroom  and 
the  bride  —  surrounded  with  any  number  of  relatives  and  witnesses, 
for  everybody  likes  to  see  a  wedding.  A  pipe,  with  bowl  of  pol- 


ESPOUSAL.  319 

ished  stone,  and  flattened  at  the  sides  so  as  to  admit  of  two  hearts 
being  carved  thereon — a  larger  one  below  representing  the  brave's, 
and  a  smaller  one  above  to  symbolize  the  squaw's — is  handed  the 
former,  who  smokes  a  little,  and  then  gives  it  to  the  latter,  and  she 
after  taking  a  few  whiffs,  passes  the  same  to  her  nearest  friend,  and 
so  it  goes  to  all  the  company.  Thus  two  are  smoked  into  one,  ac 
cording  to  what  is  called  the  '-Pipe  Ceremony." 

GYPSY    \VKDDING. 

"Few  more  fantastic  scenes  can  be  conceived  than  a  gypsy  wed 
ding.  The  place  usually  chosen  is  a  sand  pit.  In  two  long  rows 
fronting  each  other  the  attendants  take  their  stand,  leaving  a  path 
in  the  middle,  half  way  down  which  a  broomstick  is  placed,  held  up 
about  eighteen  inches  above  the  ground.  The  bridegroom  is  called, 
walks  down  the  path,  steps  over  the  broomstick,  and  awaits  the 
maiden's  arrival.  She,  too,  is  called,  walks  down  between  the  rows 
of  gypsies,  lightly  trips  over  the  stick,  and  is  then  received  into  the 
arms  of  her  husband.  A  few  days  of  feasting  follow,  and  then  the 
wild,  wandering  life  is  resumed.  Children  grow  up  in  the  tent  or 
van,  and  as  the  wants  become  greater,  the  gypsy  matron  adds  an 
other  to  her  resources  of  making  a  livelihood." 


ELOPING   WITH   A   GYPSY   PRINCESS. 

"  Great  excitement  exists  in"  the  gypsy  camp  near  Yalesville, 
just  north  of  Wallingford,  Conn.,  in  consequence  of  the  elopement 
of  the  sixteen-year-old  daughter  of  '  Prince  '  William  with  a  New 
Haven  young  man  of  twenty-five,  who  had  fallen  violently  in  love 
with  the  gypsy  princess.  She  did  not  return  to  the  camp  one  night 
at  the  usual  hour,  and  consequently  there  was  a  great  uproar.  The 
young  man  had  paid  frequent  visits  to  the  camp,  and  the  girl 


320  PROPOSAL   AND    ESPOUSAL. 

had  had  her  palm  as  frequently  crossed  with  silver,  because  she 
predicted  for  him  great  fortune.  Still  his  actions  had  not  excited 
the  suspicions  of  the  other  gypsies. 

The  young  woman  is  beautiful,  has  black  eyes,  and  long,  dark- 
hair,  and  is  one  of  sixteen  children  that  call  'Prince'  Williams 
father.  The  latter,  who  is  a  veritable  prince  among  the  gypsies, 
was  born  in  England  fifty  years  ago.  His  headquarters  are  in 
Boston,  where  he  owns  a  well-stocked  livery  stable,  which  he  looks 
after  in  the  winter,  but  in  the  summer  his  sons  attend  to  it,  while 
he  roams  at  the  head  of  his  band  through  New  England. 

He  is  reputed  to  be  very  wealthy,  and  owns,  besides,  farms  in 
East  Hartford,  Mass.,  and  Canada.  His  wife  is  the  purchasing 
agent  and  treasurer  of  the  band,  and  drives  many  a  sharp  bargain 
with  those  with  whom  she  deals.  The  prince  and  princess  have  a 
magnificent  wagon,  in  which  glass  and  gilt  predominate  as  orna 
ments,  and  is  said  to  have  cost  over  $1,000. 

No  trace  has  been  found  of  the  runaways,  and  detectives  have 
been  put  to  work  on  the  case,  with  instructions  to  spare  neither 
pains  nor  expense  to  accomplish  their  capture.  The  vengeance  of 
the  camp  will  be  visited  on  her,  as  marriage  outside  the  camp  is 
regarded  with  horror  by  these  strange  people." 


A    CELEBRATED   WEDDING   ON    A    MEMORABLE    DAY,  OR  MARRIED 
WHEN    THREE   SUNDAYS    CAME    TOGETHER. 

Edgar  A.  Poe,  with  characteristic  cleverness  and  ingenuity, 
proves  by  a  scientific  fact  the  accomplishment  of  a  seeming  im 
possibility,  and  shows  how  a  certain  guardian  uncle's  supposed 
futile  promise  came  to  be  unexpectedly  and  surprisingly  claimed 
and  performed.  For  has  not  that  queer  old  gentleman  met 
the  pleadings  of  an  importunate  suitor  for  the  hand  of  his  rich 


ESPOUSAL.  321 

neice  by  telling  him,  with  sundry  knowing  smiles  and  winks  and 
covert  expressions  of  high  glee,  that  he  (the  young  man)  shall 
have  the  girl  on  that  auspicious  day — whenever  it  may  occu«- — that 
three  Sundays  come  together. 

Now,  it  so  happens  that  this  droll  old  gentleman  has  two  friends 
'who  are  fond  of  travel,  and  who,  fortunately  for  the  young  couple, 
conceive  the  project  at  this  time  of  an  extensive  tour,  or  circum 
navigating  the  globe.  On  their  safe  return,  meeting  at  their  old 
friend's  house  to  recount  the  adventures  of  their  respective  tours,  it 
is  found  that  "  Mr.  Smitherton,"  who  set  sail  eastward,  has  been  so 
continually  anticipating  the  rising  of  the  sun  that  he  has  gained  a 
day  in  his  course  ;  while  on  the  other  hand,  "  Air.  Rumgudgcon," 
who  started  westward,  has  been  gradually  leaving  the  sun  behind 
him  on  his  constant  way,  and  has  consequently  lost  the  same  length 
of  time.  Therefore,  as  will  be  seen  by  the  discerning  reader, 
Smitherton's  Sunday  has  nimbly  stepped  over  into  Monday,  and 
Rumgudgeon's  Sabbath  has  slided  back  into  Saturday,  while  tile- 
aforesaid  uncle's  Day  of  Rest  remains  unchanged,  proving  that 
nothing  is  impossible  to  love,  and  that  "  all  things  come  round  to 
him  that  waits." 


WHERE    THE    SUN    JUMPS    A    DAY. 

"Chatham  Island,  lying  off  the  coast  of  New  Zealand,  in  the 
South  Pacific  Ocean,  is  peculiarly  situated,  as  it  is  one  of  the  habit 
able  points  of  the  globe  where  the  day  of  the  week  changes.  It  is 
just  in  the  line  of  demarcation  between  dates.  There  high  twelve 
on  Sunday,  or  noon,  ceases,  and  instantly  Monday  meridian  begins. 
Sunday  comes  into  a  man's  house  on  the  cast  side,  and  becomes 
Monday  by  the  time  it  passes  out  of  the  western  door.  A  man 
sits  down  to  his  noonday  day  dinner  on  Sunday,  and  it  is  Monday 
noon  before  he  finishes  it. 


32?  PROPOSAL     AND     ESPOUSAL. 

There  Saturday  is  Sunday,  and  Sunday  is  Monday,  and  Mon 
day  becomes  suddenly  transferred  into  Tuesday.  It  is  a  good  place 
for  people  who  have  lost  much  time,  for  by  taking  an  early  start 
they  can  always  get  a  day  ahead  on  Chatham  Island.  It  took 
philosophers  and  geographers  a  long  time  to  settle  the  puzzle  of 
where  Sunday  ceased  and  Monday  noon  began  with  a  man  travel 
ling  west  fifteen  degrees  an  hour,  or  with  the  sun.  It  is  to  be  hoped 
that  the  next  English  Arctic  expedition  will  settle  the  other  mooted 
question  :  '  Where  will  one  stop  who  travels  north-  west  continually  ?" 


A    POLISH    \YKDDING,    OR    THREE    DAYS    MARRVING. 

The  following  is  a  description  of  a  wedding  which  occurred  at  a 
place  called  Morris'  Mills,  in  the  neighborhood  of  New  York,  and 
after  a  courtship  of  a  few  weeks  continuance,  on  the  clay  appointed 
it  is  said  :  — 

"  With  a  number  of  their  friends  and  relatives  the  pair  left  for 
New  York,  where  the  nuptial  knot  was  tied  at  the  Polish  church  in 
Stanton  street,  by  their  priest.  As  soon  as  they  were  made  one 
they  took  the  first  train  for  home,  and  on  their  arrival  at  Bloomfield 
all  the  Poles  in  the  place  assembled  at  their  home,  in  Poland  lane, 
for  the  express  purpose  of  giving  them  a  serenade,  and  to  join  in 
the  festivities  of  the  day.  All  kinds  of  instruments,  drums,  tin 
pans,  violins,  tambourines,  and  bones,  were  used  on  this  occasion, 
together  with  the  burning  of  tar-barrels,  in  order  to  make  every 
thing  pertaining  to  the  wedding  a  success. 

The  wedding  reception,  which  lasted  until  midnight  of  Tuesday, 
making  three  days,  as  is  the  custom  »'n  their  native  land,  commenced 
on  Saturday  evening,  and  an  enjoyable  time  was  had  at  the  resi 
dence  of  the  bride's  parents.  All  day  Saturday  and  Sunday  the 
many  friends  of  the  happy  couple  had  an  opportunity  of  visiting 
them,  and  aft°r  offering  their  congratulations  were  escorted  into  a 


ESPOUSAL. 


323 


room  near  the  kitchen,  where  they  were  treated  to  all  the  beer  they 
wanted,  together  with  a  Hibernian  sandwich  made  expressly  for 
the  wedding  reception,  and  which  was  greatly  enjoyed  by  all  who 
partook  of  the  supper.  After  they  had  eaten,  the  guests  were  taken 
into  a  large  and  spacious  room,  where  dancing  was  kept  up  until 
midnight,  the  music  being  furnished  by  members  of  the  party.  The 
bride  and  groom  separated  each  night  after  bidding  every  one  good 
night,  going  to  their  respective  homes,  to  meet  again  at  noon  of  the 
morrow,  when  the  same  performance  was  gone  over  until  midnight. 

On  Tuesday  evening,  at  12  o'clock,  when  the  marriage  feast 
ends,  the  happy  ones  are  considered  married,  and  are  allowed  to 
gp  to  the  home  which  has  been  prepared  for  them  a  short  distance 
from  that  of  the  wife's  parents." 


MARRIAGE    THROUGH    A    DREAM. 

The  father  of  the  Jewish  Rabbi,  Moses  Maimonides,  entered 
into  the  conjugal  state  in  advanced  life  through  having  dreamt 
several  successive  times  that  he  was  wedded  to  the  daughter  of  a 

o 

butcher  in  his   neighborhood  ;  the  lady   whom   he   did   eventually 
marry. 


A    SEPTUAGENARIAN    WEDDING. 

'Tis  often  said  that  first  love,  when  sincere,  is  enduring,  and  from 
memory  never  fades  ;  that  though  people  may  deceive  themselves 
with  the  idea  that  it  has  been  crushed  and  buried  beyond  resurrec 
tion,  it  needs  but  the  sight  of  the  loved  one's  face,  or  some  tender 
recollection,  to  restore  the  affection  that  was  not  dead,  but  only 
slumbering.  A  very  striking  exemplification  of  this  was  furnished 
the  other  day  in  the  marriage  of  the  Rev.  William  D.  Buck  and 
Mrs.  Alvira  Austin,  at  the  advanced  ages  of  seventy-six  and 


324  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

seventy-two  respectively,  which  was  solemnized  in  this  city.  It  was 
learned  last  evening,  on  excellent  authority,  that  the  groom  in  his 
early  manhood  was  devotedly  attached  to  the  lady  who  is  now  his 
wife,  and  in  fact  they  were  engaged.  Some  one  of  those  peculiar 
matters,  which  it  is  often  difficult  to  explain,  broke  off  the  match. 
In  time  each  made  a  different  choice  and  married.  In  the  course 
of  events  the  Rev.  Mr.  Buck  saw  his  wife,  and  two  sons  she  had 
borne  him,  laid  in  the  grave.  Chance,  or  was  it  fate,  brought  him 
face  to  face  with  the  sweetheart  of  other  days.  The  old  love  was 
awakened,  he  wooed  and  won  her.  —  Buffalo  Courier. 


When  age  weddeth  age,  why  should  we  complain, 
"  There's  no  law  against  it  "  in  reason  or  truth  ; 

So  long  as  true  love  in  the  heart  doth  remain 
The  old  may  be  happy  as  well  as  braw  youth. 

Though  the  head  may  be  white,  yet  the  soul  is  still  young, 

The  spirit  knows  nothing  of  time,  chance  or  change  ; 
And  vows  may  be  true,  spoke  by  faltering  l<  n  ,ruc  : 
Then  to  seek  wedded  comfort  —  why  should  it  seem  strange  ? 

We  need  it  the  more  as  the  years  grow  apace  ; 

Companionship  sweetens  as  life  growth  drear  ; 
Deny  us  not  then  one  familiar  face 

To  cheer  life's  decline  and  to  wipe  the  last  tear. 


INCIDENTAL   MARRIAGES. 


I  do  not  know  whether  it  has  ever  been  noticed  that  the  pre 
mature  announcement,  or  rather  the  publication,  of  an  engagement 
between  two  people  who  previously  had  never  thought  of  sharing 
their  fortunes,  however  large  or  small,  and  of  entering  upon  a  mar- 


ESPOUSAL.  325 

riage  compact,  has  brought  about  such  a  happy  result.  I  happen 
to  know  of  two  very  happily  married  couples  who  for  the  first  time 
found  they  loved  each  other  by  a  notice  appearing  in  print  that 
they  were  engaged.  One  gentleman,  in  particular,  started  for  a 
certain  newspaper  office  with  every  intention  of  razing  the  building 
to  the  ground,  in  consequence  of  the  publication  of  this  statement, 
and  when  about  half  way  on  his  mission  had  thought  the  matter 
over,  and  concluded  to  retrace  his  steps  and  make  a  formal  pro 
position  of  marriage  to  the  young  lady.  This  he  did,  and  was  ac 
cepted.  Another  gentleman  was  asked  so' repeatedly  whether  he 
was  engaged  to  a  certain  young  lady  in  New  York  society  that  he 
concluded  she  would  make  him  a  good  wife,  and  he,  likewise,  is 
married  to  her.  Similar  results  rarely  occur.  After  all,  perhaps, 
these  social  paragraphs  more  often  conduce  to  happiness  than  they 
bring  about  the  annulment  of  matrimonial  proceeding.. — From 
Town  Talk. 


PLAYING   AT  WEDDINGS. 

But  whereunto  shall  I  liken  this  generation  ?       It   is   like   unto 
children  sitting  in  the  markets,  and  calling  unto  their  fellows, 

And  saying,  We  have  piped  unto  you,  and  ye  have  not  danced  : 
we  have  mourned  unto  you,  and  ye  have  not  lamented. — Bible. 


That  was  a  humorous,  though  dishonest,  little  school-boy  who, 
once  upon  a  time,  during  recess,  stole  into  the  master's  garden — 
adjacent  to  the  playground — and  hiding  among  the  vines,  helped 
himself  most  bountifully  to  the  rich  clusters  of  ripe  grapes,  that 
sweetly  hang  in  charming  abundance  there.  But  before  he  put 
the  tempting  morsel  to  his  longing  but  forbidden  lips,  he  sought  to 
qualify  the  doubtful  act  by  pronouncing  a  sacred  formula  over  it, 


£26  PROPOSAL   AND    ESPOUSAL. 

he  saying,  as  he  quoted  from  the  Book  of  Common  Prayer  :  "  I 
publish  the  banns  of  matrimony  between  " — these  grapes  and  my 
mouth — "  if  any  person  knowcth  any  just  cause  or  impediment  why 
they  should  not  be  joined  together  let  him  now  declare  it."  As  no 
one  seemed  to  be  present  to  interrupt  the  pleasant  ceremony,  the 
marriage  was  going  on  between  the  fruit  of  the  vine  and  the  palate  of 
the  urchin,  when,  lo  !  a  boding  presence  stole  in  upon  the  peaceful 
scene,  and  a  voice,  which  proved  to  be  the  master's  himself,  cried 
out,  as  it  came  rushing  nearer  and  nearer,  and  therefore  sounding 
louder  and  louder  on  its  approach,  "  I  publish  the  banns  of  matri 
mony  betwixt  this  stick  and  your  back.  If  any  person 
knoweth  any  just  cause—  "  I  forbid  the  banns,"  cried  the  sur 
prised  youth,  whose  wit,  like  fire  in  flint,  was  struck  out  of  him  by 
fear.  "Why?"  thundered  the  frowning  pedagogue,  as  he  held  the 
uplifted  birch  in  ominous  proximity  to  the  culprit's  trembling  back. 
"  Because  the  parties  are  not  agreed,"  replied  the  ready  boy.  As 
this  fact  was  unanswerable,  and  as  the  irate  teacher  had  been  un 
wittingly  betrayed  into  employing  the  legal  form  of  settling  the 
dispute,  the  case  was  dismissed  with  sundry  charges. 


MOCK    MARRIAGES    AND    MINISTERIAL  COMMENTS   THEREON. 

In  a  special  from  Buffalo  to  New  York,  a  correspondent  writes: 
"  There  has  been  some  stir  in  the  religious  portion  of  the  com 
munity  over  the  celebration  of  mock  Japanese  weddings  in  River 
side,  Westminster  and  other  churches.  The  craze  began  shortly 
after  ''The  Mikado"  had  been  performed  here,  and  the  results  have 
given  the  ministers  some  uneasiness.  The  last  church  ceremony 
was  at  Riverside  Methodist  Church,  the  principal  performers  being 
Joseph  C.  Adams,  a  bookkeeper,  and  Miss  Mary  Scott,  a  school 
teacher,  the  handsomest  couple  in  Black  Rock.  They  do  not  con 
sider  themselves  married.  It  would  be  embarrassing  if  the  marri- 


ESPOUSAL. 

age  should  prove  to  be  genuine,  inasmuch  as  it  is  whispered  that 
both  parties  have  other  attachments.  A  leading  minister  said 
to-day  : 

'  I  have  not  seen  the  Mikado.  But.  if  what  I  have  been  told  is 
correct,  Dr.  Smith  has  been  indiscreet  in  allowing  a  representation 
of  the  opera  in  his  church.  The  name  Yum  Yum  is  vulgar  and 
slangy,  and  even  a  comical  wedding  between  such  a  character  and 
a  lord  high  executioner  is  distasteful  to  religious  people.  I  am  told 
that  the  ceremony  was  even  more  binding  and  formal  than  at 
Riverside.  It  is  shocking.  It  is  demoralizing,  and,  in  common 
with  other  Presbyterians,  I  protest  against  such  practices.' 

The  Rev.  Patrick  Cronin,  editor  of  The  Catholic  Union,  who  is 
closely  in  sympathy  with  Bishop  Ryan,  has  written  a  letter  in 
which  he  says  :  '  Mock  marriages  are  a  dangerous  game  to  play 
The  essence  of  marriage  is  the  consent  of  the  contracting  parties  ; 
and  when  this  consent  is  clearly  manifested  (usually  by  words) 
there  is  no  longer  any  mock  about  it.  The  consenting  parties  are 
wedded.  It  seems  to  me  that  the  many  melancholy  instances  fur 
nished  by  the  public  press  of  frolicksome  mock  marriages,  how  they 
have  blighted  happy  homes  and  withered  human  hearts,  should  be 
sufficient  warning  against  such  amusement,  which  begins  in  smiles, 
but  so  often  ends  in  tears.' 

The  Rev.  Dr.  Brown,  rector  of  St.  Paul's  Cathedral,  says  :  '  T^e 
mock  marriages  tend  to  irreverence,  however  unintentional,  and  to 
the  depreciation  of  the  solemn  service  of  matrimony.  I  hope  they 
may  be  discontinued.' 

The  Rev.  Mr.  Falk,  rabbi  of  the  Temple  Beth  Zion,  says  that 
he  was  surprised  that  Japanese  mock  marriages  should  have  been 
allowed  in  any  house  of  worship,  and  characterizes  them  as  pro 
fane  entertainments. 


328  I'KOPOSAL   AM)    ESPOUSAL. 

Other  clergymen  denounce  the  craze  with  more  or  less  vehe 
mence  :  the  only  advocates  it  has  being  the  ministers  who  tied  the 
impersonators  of  Yimi-Yuui  and  Nanki-1'oo" 


A    TWICK-\YKI)I)KD    PAIR. 

Not  a  little  surprise  has  been  created  by  the  news  of  the  elope 
ment  of  Miss  Belle  M  --  ,  daughter  of  Mr.  Edward  M  --  .  The 
family  arc  well  know  to  many  in  London.  The  young  lady  had 
for  some  time  past  been  engaged  to  the  gentleman  who  is  now  her 
husband,  Mr.  A.  Willard  F  --  ,  who  spent  last  Sunday  in  the  city. 
lie  being  very  anxious  for  an  early  marriage,  urged  Miss  M  — 
to  obtain  her  parents  consent  to  an  immediate  union,  and  accom 
pany  him  home.  Me  was  especially  anxious  to  be  married  at  once 
as  it  would  probably  be  man}-  months  before  he  could  again  secure 
leave  of  absence.  Knowing  that  her  parents  would  raise  objections 
to  such  a  summary  proceeding,  although  they  were  perfectly  satis 
fied  with  her  choice,  Miss  M—  -  decided  to  accompany  her  af 
fianced  to  Detroit,  without  their  approval,  leaving  a  note  for  her 
father,  telling  him  the  reason  of  her  departure.  The  young  couple 
left  on  the  afternoon  train,  and  on  their  arrival  in  Detroit  were  at 
once  united  at  the  office  of  a  justice  of  the  peace.  Mr.  M—  -  left 
on  the  first  train  after  receiving  the  note,  and  on  finding  his  daugh 
ter,  was  informed  of  the  marriage.  As  Mr.  M—  —did  not  like  the 
idea  of  a  marriage  unless  solemnized  by  a  minister  of  the  gospel, 
the  young  couple  acceded  to  his  wish,  and  were  remarried  on  Tues 
day  in  Grand  Rapids  by  Rev.  Sanficld  Cobb,  Presbyterian  minis 
ter.  —  London  Advertiser. 


EXPENSIVE     WEDDINGS.. 

In  India,  and  in  the  great  cities  of  Central    Asia,  the  expenses 
of  a  wedding  are  very  great,  and  consequently  some  parents  excuse 


ESPOUSAL.  329 

themselves  in  disposing  of  their  daughter  on  the  score  of  expense 
—the  difficulty  they  find  in  defraying  the  expenses  of  the  wedding. 
The  unnecessary  expenses  of  their  marriage  ceremonies,  the  din 
ners,  the  music,  and  the  marriage  presents,  often  hamper  a  family 
through  life.  Parents,  however  poor,  think  it  absolutely  necessary 
to  celebrate  the  marriage  of  their  daughters  at  a  great  expense. 

For  example,  a  munshs,  or  clerk,  receiving  the  modest  salary  of 
thirty  shillings  a  month,  will  spend  a  hundred  pounds  upon  his 
daughter's  wedding,  especially  if  she  should  be  fortunate  enough  to 
secure  the  hand  of  a  husband  in  a  nobler  or  better-born  family 
than  his  own.  The  dearly-loved  customs  cannot  be  passed  over. 
And  if  parents  find  it  impossible  to  meet  the  pecuniary  demands 
of  the  marriage  ceremonies,  the  needless  parade  of  music,  the  use 
less  articles  of  finery  for  the  girl's  person,  and  the  marriage  portion 
in  goods  and  chattels  the  girl  has  no  alternative  but  to  remain 
single  all  the  days  of  her  life. 

There  are  many  daughters  in  high-born  but  needy  families  in 
this  position.  It  is  this  difficulty  that  in  darker  days  induced  Mo 
hammedan  villages  to  follow  the  example  of  the  Rajputs  and  to 
destroy  their  female  children  at  their  birth. 

It  is  related  by  Mrs.  Meer  Hason  Ali,  an  English  lady  who 
married  a  Mohammedan  gentleman  in  Luckno\v  some  fifty  years 
ago,  that  Nawab  Asoof  ud  Dowlah,  hearing  with  horror  of  the  fre 
quent  occurrence  of  female  infanticide  amongst  poor  villagers,  issued 
a  proclamation  to  his  subjects  in  Oude,  commanding  them  to  de 
sist  from  this  barbarous  custom,  and  as  an  inducement  to  the  wicked 
parents  to  preserve  their  female  offspring  alive,  offered  grants  of 
land  to  every  female  as  a  marriage  portion. 

Even  in  the  present  day  the  birth  of  a  daughter  casts  a  tempor 
ary  gloom  over  a  Moslem  family,  whilst  the  birth  of  a  boy  is  a 


33°  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

season  of  rejoicing.  Some  say  it  is  more  honorable  to  have  sons 
than  daughters,  but  others  believe  that  it  is  the  expense  and  trouble 
of  settling  the  daughters  that  is  the  real  cause  of  this  unnatural 
feeling. —  Tlic  Leisure  Hour. 


"AND    THEY    MADE    LIGHT   OE    IT." 

Ye  sons  of  frivolity,— 
Daughters  of  jollity— 
That  sport  in  low  fashion, 
Till  play  becomes  passion, 
With  things  esteemed  holy, 
Your  faith  grown  to  folly  ; 
.Adepts  in  mere  vanities, 
Accomplished  inanities  : 
Who  deem  it  a  merit 
To  quench  the  good  Spirit. 
Your  heaven  in  laughter, 
While  hell  follows  after  ; 
Alas  !  for  this  lightness 
(Sure  bane  of  uprightness") 
Of  sin's  rising  leaven, 
It  swells  up  to  heaven, 
And  braves  the  Creator 
In  dispute  which  is  greater. 
With  Satan  consorting, 
In  evil  disporting  ; 
Unheeding,  unshaming, 
It  meets  judgment's  flaming 
And  knoweth  no  turning 
Till  plunged  in  the  burning. 


THE    MARRIAGE    BOND. 


HE  bond  of  wedlock  is  the  closest  of  all  bonds.  It  ex 
cels,  but  dissolves  none.  This  leaving- of  the  parents 
loseth  not  the  duty  which  the  law  lays  on  the  child. 
Rachel,  though  married  to  Jacob,  yet  prayeth  pardon 
for  her  duty  of  Laban  her  father.  She  did  it  not  ;  but  in 
praying  pardon  she  acknowledged  it.  Joseph  did  it  ; 
though  in  power  next  to  the  king,  yet  did  he  reverence  his  father 
even  with  his  face  down  to  the  ground.  Not  in  case  alone  of  rcv- 
ence,  but  also  of  relief,  obedience,  protection,  and  whatsoever  duty 
is  comprised  besides  within  that  general  term  of  honor.  But  still 
with  this  proviso,  that  the  duties  to  be  done  by  the  child  unto  the 
parent  disturb  not  the  conjunction  between  the  married  couple. 
They  must  give  place  to  this,  as  both  the  straighter  bond  and  the 
more  ancient.  The  decalogue  is  younger  than  this  institution.  Hus 
band  and  wife  were  before  child  and  parent.  Sinai  must  yield  to 
Paradise.  That  which  God  bids  doth  dispense  with,  that  which 
Moses  bids.  Or  say  that  God  bids  both  ;  Moses  was  but  God's 
mouth.  God  commands  not  contraries.  The  one  includes  the 
tacit  acception  of  the  other.  That  abrogates  not  this.  Say  the 
most  you  can  against  it,  that  God  speaks  not  preceptive,  but  per 
missive  only  ;  yet  so  it  is  an  indulgence.  The  latter  is  the  law  ; 
and  a  man  is  tied  to  that.  But  wedlock  hath  a  privilege,  and  the 

331 


332  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

married  man  by  it  may  leave  both  father  and   mother,   and  cleave 
unto  his  wife. 

Whether  this  describes  the  marriage  bond  or  defines  the  mar 
riage  duties,  I  will  not  say.  Let  it  be  the  first.  Christ  hath  but 
called  it  a  conjunction  ;  it  is  more.  Conjunction  is  sometimes  of 
things  remote.  The  sun  and  moon  are  far  asunder,  even  in  their 
conjunction.  Saint  Paul's  term  hath  more  emphasis,  and  the  evan 
gelists  have  it,  too  ;  'tis  an  agglutination.  Glue  joins  two  bodies  as 
but  one.  My  text's  term  is  significant  :  can  things  be  closer  than 
cleave  together.  But  Saint  Paul's  term  is  more  pregnant.  Glue 
not  only  closeth,  but  fastens,  too  ;  fastens  so  firmly  that  the  bodies 
joined  together  will  rather  rend  in  the  whole  than  sever  in  the 
joint.  The  bond  of  marriage  is  indissoluble.  Of  two  things  glued 
together,  the  one  will  pull  away  with  a  piece  from  the  other  rather 
than  'twill  part  from  it.  See  we  it  not  in  this  very  subject?  Death 
offers  violence  to  this  bond,  and  will  dissolve  it.  The  man  and 
wife  must  yield.  They  must,  but  will  not.  Death  sunders  them 
by  force  ;  but  how?  The  one  pulls  away  with  it  a  part  from  the 
other,  and  that  part  is  the  heart.  The  corpse  of  the  dead  carries 
away  with  it  even  the  soul  of  the  survivor.  Not  the  soul  only,  but 
the  body  too,  sometimes.  Doth  not  one  month,  one  week,  some 
times  one  day,  bury  both  wife  and  husband  ?  Not  in  contagious 
times  (then  'tis  no  marvel),  but  merely  through  the  tenacity  of  this 
glue,  the  bond  of  wedlock  ;  it  hath  so  soldered  their  souls  together 
that  the  man  will  say  of  the  woman,  as  Jacob  did  of  Joseph, 
"Surely  I  will  go  down  into  the  grave  unto  my  wife  sorrowing." 

So  straight,  so  firm  is  the  bond  of  marriage,  that  not  only  not 
Christ's  term  expresses  it,  a  conjunction,  to  be  joined  together  ;but 
not  my  text's  term  either,  an  adhesion,  to  cleave  together  ;  no,  nor 
yet  that  of  Saint  Paul's,  an  agglutination,  to  be  glued  together. 
Glue  makes  two  things  as  one,  quasi  utunn  ;  but  marriage  makes 
two  merely  one  ;  the  words  of  my  text,  "  And  they  twain  shall  be 


THE    MARRIAGE    r.ONL).  333 

one  flesh,"  meant  not  in  the  children  of  their  bodies,  that  the  parents 
shall  be  one  in  them,  as  the  Greek  fathers  mostly  construe  it,  moved 
by  the  phrase,  in  carneui  umnn.  Christ  hath  removed  that  scruple, 
ima  caro  funt,  they  are  one  flesh.  The  wife  and  husband,  though 
they  never  have  child,  or  if  they  have,  yet  before  they  have,  yea, 
the  very  instant  of  the  marriage,  saith  our  Saviour,  they  are  no 
longer  two,  but  even  then  are  one  flesh.  And  therefore  Saint  Paul 
calls  the  woman's  flesh,  her  husbands,  and  a  man's  wife,  himself. 
And  this  not  religion  only  teacheth,  but  law,  too  ;  which  reputeth 
the  wife  and  husband  but  one  person.  As  when  God  formed  Eve 
of  Adam,  he  made  one  two  ;  so  when  he  brought  her  to  Adam  he 
made  two  one.  —  Extract  Jrom  a  wedding  sermon  by  Richard  Clarke, 
Archbishop  of  Canterbury,  (1637.) 


ANCIENT    MARRIAGE    BOND. 

We  come  unto  the  solemn  ceremonies  used  by  the 
Romans  in  their  marriages.  We  will  first  shew  the  manner  of  their 
contracts,  when  each  did  promise  the  other  to  live  as  man  and  wife. 
Now  the  manner  of  contracting  was  commonly  thus  :  They  did,  for 
the  greater  security,  write  down  the  form  of  the  contract  upon  tables 
of  record,  as  appeareth  by  Juvenal,  Sat.  6. 

These  tables  were  also  sealed  with  the  signets  of  certain  wit 
nesses  there  present,  who  were  termed,  from  their  act  of  sealing, 
Signatures.  Moreover,  before  they  would  begin  the  ceremonies  of 
their  contract,  the  man  procured  a  soothsayer,  and  the  woman  an 
other,  with  whom  first  they  would  consult.  The  token  or  sign 
which  these  soothsayer  in  the  time  of  observing  accounted  most 
fortunate  was  a  crow. 

The  man  also  gave,  in  token  of  good  will,  a  ring  unto  the  woman, 
which  she  was  to  wear  upon  the  next  finger  unto  the  little  finger  of 


334  PROPOSAL  AND  ESPOUSAL. 

the  left  hand,  because  unto  that  finger  alone   proceeded  a  certain 
artery  from  the  heart. 

Again,  because  of  the  good  success  that  Romulus  and  his  fol 
lowers  had  in  the  violent  taking  away  of  the  Sabine  women,  they 
continued  a  custom  that  the  man  should  come  and  take  away  his 
wife  by  a  seeming  violence  from  the  lap  or  bosom  of  her  mother  or 
the  next  of  kin. 

She  being  thus  taken  away,  her  husband  did  dissever  and  divide 
the  hair  of  her  head  with  the  top  of  a  spear,  wherewith  some  fencer 
formerly  had  been  killed,  which  ceremony  did  betoken  that  nothing 
should  dis-join  them  but  such  a  spear,  or  such  like  violence." 


MARRIAGE    DOWRY. 

At  the  time  of  the  marriage,  also,  the  man  gave  his  wife  a 
dowry-bill,  which  the  scrivener  wrote,  and  the  bridegroom  paid  for, 
whereby  he  endowed  his  spouse,  if  she  were  a  virgin,  with  two  hun 
dred  denicrs  (that  is  fifty  shekels)  ;  and  if  she  had  been  married  be 
fore,  with  an  hundried  deniers  (that  is  twenty-five  shekels),  and  this 
was  called  the  root  or  principal  of  the  dowery.  The  dowery  might 
not  be  less,  but  more,  so  much  as  he  would,  though  it  were  to  a 
talent  of  gold.  There  is  mention  of  a  contract  between  Tobias  and 
Sara,  and  that  was  performed  not  by  a  scrivener,  but  by  Ragnel, 
the  woman's  father  ;  where,  we  may  observe,  that  before  the  writing 
of  this  bill,  there  was  a  giving  of  the  woman  unto  her  husband. 
The  form  of  words  there  used  is  :  "  Behold,  take  her  after  the  law 
of  Moses."  —  Tobit  vii.  16. 

A  copy  of  this  dowery-bill  is  taken  by  Bertram  out  of  the  Baby 
lon  Talmud.  The  words  thereof  are  thus  :  "  Upon  the  sixth  day 
of  the  week,  the  fourth  of  the  month,  in  the  year  five  thousand,  two 
hundred  and  fifty-four  of  the  creation  of  the  world,  according  to 


THE  MARRIAGE  BOND.  335 

the  computation  which  we  use  here  at  -  — ,  a  city  which  is  situate 
on  the  sea-shore  :  the  bride-groom,  Rabbi  Moses,  the  son  of  Rabbi 
Jehuda,  said  unto  the  bride-wife  Clarona,  the  daughter  of  Rabbi 
David,  the  son  of  Rabbi  Moses,  a  citizen  of  Lisbon  :  Be  unto  me  a 
wife  according  to  the  law  of  Moses  and  Israel,  and  I,  according  to 
the  word  of  God,  will  worship,  honor,  maintain  and  govern  thee 
according  to  the  manner  of  the  husbands  among  the  Jews,  which 
do  worship,  honor,  maintain  and  govern  their  wives  faithfully  ;  I 
also  do  bestow  upon  thcc  the  dowery  of  thy  virginity,  two  hundred 
deniers  in  silver,  which  belong  unto  thcc  by  the  law,  and  moreover 
thy  food,  thy  apparel,  and  sufficient  necessaries,  as  likewise  the 
knowledge  of  thee  according  to  the  custom  of  the  whole  earth. 
Thus  Clarona  the  virgin  rested,  and  became  a  wile  to  Rabbi  Moses 
the  son  of  Jehuda,  the  bridegroom.'' 


JEWISH    MARRLvGe,    SONG. 

The  rites  and  ceremonies  of  their  marriage  were  performed  in 
an  assembly  of  ten  men  at  least,  with  blessings  and  thanksgivings 
unto  God,  whence  the  house  itself  was  called  the  house  of  praise, 
and  their  marriage  song,  the  song  of  thanksgiving,  the  sum  whereof 
is  this  :  The  chief  of  the  bridemen  takcth  a  cup  and  blesseth  it, 
"  Blessed  art  Thou,  O  Lord,  our  God,  the  king  of  the  world,  which 
createth  the  fruit  of  the  vine."  Afterward  he  saith  :  "  Blessed  be 
the  Lord  our  God,  the  King  of  the  world,  who  hath  created  man 
after  His  own  image,  according  to  the  image  of  His  own  likeness, 
and  hath  thereby  prepared  unto  Himself  an  everlasting  building. 
Blessed  be  Thou,  O  Lord,  who  hath  created  him."  Then  followeth 
again  :  "  Blessed  art  Thou,  O  Lord  our  God,  who  hath  created  joy 
and  gladness,  the  bridegroom  and  the  bride,  charity  and  brotherly 
love,  rejoicing,  and  pleasure,  peace  and  society.  I  beseech  Thee  O, 
Lord,  let  there  be  suddenly  heard  in  the  cities  of  Judah,  and  the 


PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

streets  of  Jerusalem,  the  voice  of  joy  and  gladness,  the  voice  of  the 
bridegroom  and  the  bride,  the  voice  of  exaltation  in  the  bride- 
chamber  sweeter  than  any  feasts,  and  children  sweeter  than  the 
sweetness  of  a  song."  And  this  being  ended,  he  drinkcth  to  the 
married  couple. 

NUPTIALS. 

The  marriage  bond  is  sometimes  spoken  of  as  the  nuptials,  from 
nuptie,  which  -'tie"  comes  from  a  word  signifying  "a  covering  ;" 
because  the  virgins,  when  they  came  to  their  husbands,  for  modesty 
and  shamefacedncss,  covered  their  faces,  even  as  Rebckah,  on  meet 
ing  Isaac,  cast  a  veil  over  her  face  ;  and  Potter,  in  his  Antiquities, 
tells  us  that  the  bride  was  usually  brought  to  her  husband  with  a 
yellow  covering  or  veil,  called  the  nuptie,  over  her  face,  and  was 
conducted  to  his  house  with  five  torches,  signifying  thereby  the 
need  which  married  persons  have  of  five  gods  or  goddesses,  /.  e 
Jupiter,  Juno,  Venus,  Suadela,  and  Diana. 


A    WEDDED   JUDGMENT,   OR    THE    P.OND   OE    INIQUITY. 

Paul  speaks  of  being  bound  together  with  his  yoke  fellows  in 
the  Lord  ;  but  there  are  some,  alas  !  that  are  bound  together  in  the 
devil.  The  worst  judgment  that  can  bcfal  an  evil  man  is  to  marry 
a  woman  as  wicked  as  himself;  as  witness  Ahab  and  Jezebel.  And 
well  saith  the  Apocrypha,  "  A  wicked  woman  is  given  as  a  portion 
to  a  wicked  man."  "  If  ye  walk  contrary  to  me,  I  also  will  walk- 
contrary  to  you,"  saith  the  Almighty  ;  and  this  is  often  done,  even 
at  the  hymeneal  altar,  where  God  curseth  a  wicked  man's  blessings 
in  the  very  gift  of  his  wife.  And  thus  beginning  under  the  curser 
they  continue  under  it,  and  live  a  cursed  life  and  die  a  cursed  death 
together — a  brord  of  the  ungodly,  a  generation  of  vipers. 


THE    WEDDING    SHOE. 

"THE    HOUSE    OF   HIM    THAT  HATH    HIS   SHOE   LOOSED." 


F  BRETHREN  dwell  together,  and  one  of  them   die, 
and  have  no  child,  the  wife  of  the  dead  shall  not  marry 
without  unto  a  stranger  ;  her   husbands  brother  shall 
take  her  to  him  to  wife,  and  perform   the  duties  of  an 
husband's  brother  unto  her. 

And  it  shall  be  that  the  first-born  which  she  beareth 
shall  succeed  in  the  name  of  his  brother  which  is  dead,  that  his 
name  be  not  put  out  of  Israel. 

And  if  the  man  like  not  to  take  his  brother's  wife,  then  let  his 
brother's  wife  go  up  to  the  gate  unto  the  elders,  and  say,  My  hus 
band's  brother  refuseth  to  raise  up  unto  his  brother  a  name  in 
Israel,  he  will  not  perform  the  duty  of  my  husband's  brother. 

Then  the  elders  of  this  city  shall  call  him,  and  speak  unto  him  : 
and  if  he  stand  to  it,  and  say,  I  like  not  to  take  her  ; 

Then  shall  his  brother's  wife  come  unto  him  in  the  presence  of 
the  elders,  and  loose  his  shoe  from  off  his  foot,  and  spit  in  his  face, 
and  shall  answer  and  say.  So  shall  it  be  done  unto  the  man  that 
will  not  build  up  his  brother's  house. 

And  his  name  shall  be  called  in  Israel  the  house  of  him  that 
hath  his  shoe  loosed. — Bible. 

22*  337 


338  PROPOSAL   AND    ESPOUSAL. 

The  fair  Jewess  spat  in  his  face, 

Who  denied  her  the  marriage  relation 

When  his  brother  had  left  her  embrace, 
And  died  without  seed  in  the  nation. 

Down-stooping,  she  loosed  off  his  shoe, 
Symbolic  of  broken  dominion  ! 

As  unworthy  the  name  of  a  Jew, 
A  dastard  in  public  opinion. 


In  Turkey,  the  bridegroom  after  marriage  is  ch?scd  by  the 
guests,  who  administer  blows  by  way  of  adieus,  or  pelt  him  with 
slippers.  —  Thirty  Years  in  t/ic  Hainn. 

THE    SHOE    A    SYMISOL    OF    AUTHORITY. 

Mr.  Urquhart  tells  us  that  being  at  a  Jewish  wedding,  and 
standing  beside  the  bridegroom,  he  observed  that  when  the  bride 
entered,  he  stooped  down  as  he  crossed  the  threshold,  drew  off  his 
shoe,  and  struck  her  with  the  heel  on  the  nape  of  the  neck." 


In  Anglo-Saxon  marriages,  the  father  delivered  the  bride's 
shoe  to  the  bridegroom,  who  touched  her  with  it  on  the  head  to 
show  his  authority.  —  Breicer 


Mr.  Robert's,  when  travelling  in  the  East,  observed  that 
an  affectionate  widow  never  parts  with  her  husband's  shoes- 
They  are  placed  near  her  when  she  sleeps  ;  she  kisses  them  and 
puts  her  head  upon  them  ;  and  nearly  every  time  after  bathing  she 
goes  to  look  at  them.  They  are  a  perpetual  memento  to  her  of 
the  protection  she  has  lost. 


THE   WEDDING    SHOE.  339 

Throwing  the  wedding-  shoe  over  the  head  of  the  bride  as  she 
comes  from  the  altar  is  still  a  custom  in  some  parts  of  England, 

~Waa*  -  4  -  ..  --  9 


WHERE   THE  SHOE    PINCHES. 

No  one  knuws  where  the  shoe  pinches  but  he  that  puts  it  on.  — 
Old  Saying. 

I  wot  weel  where  my  ain  shoe  binds.  —  Scottish  Proverb. 

"The  authorship  of  this  proverb  is  commonly  ascribed  to 
^Emilius  Paulus  ;  but  the  story  told  by  Plutarch  leaves  it  doubtful 
whether  /Emilius  used  a  known  illustration  or  invented  one.  The 
relations  of  his  wife  remonstrated  with  him  on  his  determination  to 
repudiate  her,  she  being  an  honorable  matron,  against  whom  no 
fault  could  be  alleged.  ^Emilius  admitted  the  lady's  worth  ;  but 
pointing  to  one  of  his  shoes,  he  asked  the  remonstrants  what  they 
thought  of  it.  They  thought  it  a  handsome  and  well-fitting  shoe. 
"  But  none  of  you,"  he  rejoined,  "  can  tell  where  it  pinches  me." 

THE   CHARM    OF   THE    HORSE-SHOE 

But  the  shoe  around  which  superstition  "rages"  the  most  incon 
tinently  is  not  the  common  shoe  of  the  cordwainer,  be  it  old  or  new, 
whether  the  ornamental  shoe  of  the  Paris  shop  window,  or  the  "old 
shoes  and  clouted  "  picked  up  from  the  shuns  and  gutters  and  used 
with  a  decoction  of  sugar  in  the  distillation  of  rum  in  New  York 
city  ;  but  the  shoe  alike  of  the  parlor  and  the  stable,  of  bright  bric- 
a-brac  and  neglected  outhouse,  of  our  modern  needlework  and  oi 
ancient  sculpture  (for  we  found  the  figure  thereof  four  times  re- 
oeated  on  a  gravestone  in  Dryburgh  Abbey,  Scotland), 

And  only  high  heaven  knows  what  we  should  dor 
If  we  lost  the  bright  charm  of  the  gilded  horse-shoe. 


f&f^&^ff^ 

i\ai^ 


THE    HONEYMOON. 

OR    THE    FIRST    MO(o)NTII    AFTER   MARRIAGE. 


'I  I  IE  first  month  after  marriage  was  called  "The  Honey- 
•^^*  moon,"  from  the  practice  of  the  ancient  Teutons  of  drink- 
^f>  in£  honey-wine  (Hydromel)  for  thirty  days  after  mar- 
£jp  riage.  Attila,  the  Hun,  indulged  so  freely  in  hydromel 

at  his  wedding  feast  that  he  died. 

Hast  thou  found  honey,  eat  so  much  as  is  good  for  thce,  lest 
thou  be  full  and  vomit  therewith. — Solomon. 

"  A  sentimental  bride  put  the  following  question  to  her  mother 
on  the  eve  of  her  wedding  :  '  How  long  does  the  so-called  honey 
moon  last  ?'  Her  practical  mamma  replied  :  '  Till  you  ask  your 
husband  for  money.'  " 

A  bee  was  the  symbol  of  the  Egyptian  kings.  The  honey  was 
the  reward  they  gave  the  meritorious  ;  the  sting  the  punishment  of 
the  unworthy. 

The  bees  of  Hymettus  made  the  most  celebrated  honey :  and 
the  etymological  relation  of  Hymen  to  Hymettus  is  patent  to  all. 

"  It  was  the  custom  of  some  heathen  priests  of  old,  in  the  ser 
vice  of  their  Gods,  to  wash  or  dip  their  tongues  in  honey  ;  an  excel 
lent  emblem  to  teach  us  how  our  tongues  must  be  purified,  and 
sanctified  and  seasoned  with  the  word." 

340 


THE    HONEYMOON.  34! 

Because  of  the  sweetness  of  a  man's  lips  the  king  shall  be  his 
1  rien  cl . — Proverbs. 

The  fair  Servians  held  a  lump  of  sugar  between  their  teeth 
when  getting  married,  to  show  that  their  conversation  must  be 
sweet  and  pleasant. 

The  Athenian  law  compelled  the  married  parties  on  retiring  to 
eat  a  quince  together  for  the  same  reason. 

Likewise,  ye  wives,  be  in  subjection  to  you  own  husbands ;  that 
if  any  obey  not  the  word,  they  also  may  without  the  word  be  won 
by  the  conversation  of  their  wives. 

While  they  behold  your  chaste  conversation  coupled  with  fear. 
— Scripture. 

The  Andamanese  spend  the  honeymoon  at  home. 


THE    HONEYMOON    PLEASANT    IN    ITS   ASSOCIATIONS. 

From  the  sentence,  "  Be  attentive  at  the  doors  of  the  law," 
Rabbi  Meir  declared  that  every  scholar  should  have  at  least  three 
teachers,  and  that  the  word  "  doors  "  possesses  a  peculiar  idea  or 
meaning.  For  instance,  a  person  in  passing  the  door  of  the  house 
in  which  he  passed  his  honeymoon,  or  the  door  of  a  hall  of  justice 
in  which  he  has  been  convicted  or  acquitted,  or  the  door  of  a  house 
in  which  he  has  sinned,  what  different  thoughts,  feelings,  and  recol 
lections  will  be  awakened  in  him. —  Talmud. 

'Tis  said  of  the  spouse,  in  Solomon's  song, 
That  honey  and  milk  are  under  her  tongue  ; 
For  the  church's  lips  drop  as  a  sweet  honey  comb, 
The  charm  of  the  soul  and  the  music  of  home. 


HUSBANDS    AND    WIVES. 


jf 

HE  derivation  of  these  , names   seems  to  be  as  follows  : 

Husband — House-band.     Wive — Weaver.      The  man 
was   called   husband    or   house-band  because  he  con 
nected  the  family  and  kept  it  together.      The  woman 
was  called  wife,  or  the  weaver,  because  she  did'the  spinning 
or  weaving. 

The  husband  is  the  head  of  the  wife,  inasmuch  as  he  is  the  head 
of  the  household,  though  she  is  associated  with  him,  and  as  such  he 
is  entitled  to  the  respect  and  affection  of  all. 

The  head  is  he,  upholding  all, 

The  joints  and  bands  supporting  ; 
And  she,  th'  enfolding  sinews  small, 

With  kindly  head  consorting. 

In  Bible  times  a  man  was  called  husband  on  his  betrothal  to  a 
maiden,  so  sacred  was  the  engagement  considered.  See  Matthew 
i.  16,  where  Joseph  is  called  the  husband  of  Mary  before  marriage, 

There  are,  we  opine,  no  names  in  the  Hebrew  language — which 
is  doubtless  the  oldest  tongue  of  all — for  such  social  nondescripts  as 
"  flirts  "  and  "  coquets."  They  were  the  parasitical  aftergrowth  of 
a  more  Uvity-sa\  age  than  even  Leviticus  itself. 

Rabbi  Jose,  says  the  Talmud,  never  called  his  spouse  "wife,"  but 
44  home,"  for  she  indeed  made  his  home. 

34! 


"Hail!  pretty  bud 
Offflp.sh  and  blood.' 


HUSBANDS    AND   WIVES.  343 

Among  the  lonians  of  Asia,  the  woman  as  we  arc  informed  by 
Herodotus,  did  not  share  the  table  of  her  husband  ;  she  dared  not 
call  him  by  his  name,  but  addressed  him  with  the  title  of  lord,  and 
lived  secluded  in  the  interior  of  the  house  ;  on  this  model  the  most 
important  relations  between  man  and  wife  had  been  also  regulated 
at  Athens. 

But  among  the  Dorians  of  Sparta,  the  wife  was  honored  by  her 
husband  with  the  title  of  Despoina,  though  she  lived  in  the  interior. 
of  the  house,  like  the  Ionian  female.  Nay,  so  strange  did  the  im 
portance  which  the  Lacedaemonian  women  enjoyed,  and  the  influ 
ence  which  they  exercised  as  tho  managers  of  their  household  and 
mothers  of  families,  appear  to  the  other  Greeks,  at  a  time  when  the 
prevalence  of  Athenian  manners  prevented  a  clue  consideration  for 
national  customs,  that  Aristotle  actually  supposed  Lycurgus  to  have 
attempted,  but  without  success,  to  regulate  the  life  of  Women,  as  he 
had  that  of  the  men  ;  and  the  Spartans  were  frequently  censured 
for  submitting  to  the  yoke  of  their  wives.  —  Antlun. 


"  A  prudent  wife  is  from  the  Lord,"  saith  Solomon,  and   woe  to 
his  happiness  who  spurns  a  gift  of  God. 

He  that  getteth   a  wife,  gctteth   a  good   thing,   and   obtaincth 
favor  of  the  Lord.  —  Proverbs, 


Good  wives  are  called  "  discreet,  chaste,  keepers  at  home."  &c. 
Keepers  at  home  are  usually  keepers  of  home,  /.  e.  active  occupants 
of  the  chosen  place,  even  as  a  man  is  said  to  be  a  "  keeper  of  a  vine 
yard,"  which  means  vastly  more  than  simply  guarding  the  inclosure 
from  unlawful  intrusion  of  man  and  beast.  But  as  Adam,  the  first 
husband  and  husbandman,  was  put,  after  his  creation,  into  the  gar 
den  of  Eden  "  to  dress  and  to  keep  it,"  and  to  have  it  produce  and 


344  PROPOSAL    AND.    ESPOUSAL. 

yield  a  sumptuous  abundance  ;  so  these  are  to  keep  their  own 
house,  even  as  a  deacon  of  the  church  is  enjoined  to  rule  his  own 
house. 


"  By  the  addition  of  one  letter,  a  different  Greek  letter  is  given 
in  some  of  the  ancient  MSS.,  which  gives  the  meaning  "  workers  at 
home."  Eisner,  however,  thinks  the  former  word  includes  both 
ideas  ;  such  women  "take  care  of  things  belonging  to  the  house  and 
keep  them,  they  look  after  domestic  affairs  with  prudence  and  care." 
The  English  'housewife,'  in  its  old  significance,  has  been  deemed 
closely  equivalent  to  the  the  Greek  oikonrous" 


That  they  teach  their  young  women  to  be   sober,   to  love  their 
husbands,  to  love  their  children. 

To  be  discreet,  chaste,  keepers  at  home,  good,  obedient  to  their 
husbands,  that  the  word  of  God  be  not  blasphemed.  —  Bi 


Til?:    MUTTAL    DUTIES    OF    HUSBANDS    AND   WIVES. 

'•  That  man  doth  not  exercise  himself  unto  Godliness  as  a  hus 
band  that  loves  not  his  wife  without  dissimulation  ;  or  doth  not,  as 
as  much  as  in  him  lies,  promote  her  spiritual  and  everlasting  wel 
fare  ;  that  doth  not  care  for  dwelling  with  her,  nor  thinks  it  his 
duty  to  entreat  the  light  of  God's  countenance  for  her,  or  join  in 
prayer  with  her  ;  that  is  intemperate  in  his  wedlock,  or  thinks  that 
the  strict  alliance  between  him  and  her  warrants  every  immodest, 
extravagant  and  inordinate  pleasure  and  desire,  or  that  no  decorum 
is  to  be  observed  in  that  estate  ;  that  hath  no  care  of  her  health, 
wealth  and  credit,  or  loves  her  more  for  her  money  and  beauty  than 
her  virtue  ;  that  gives  her  reproachful  language,  and  reproves  her 


HUSBANDS   AND   WIVES.  345 

not  with  tenderness  and  compassion  if  her  errors  deserve  reprehen 
sion  ;  that  doth  not  instruct  her  so  far  as   he   is  able,    or  doth  not 
help  her  to  bear  the  burden  of  the  family  ;  that  is  a  stranger  to  all 
pity,  and  cares  not  what  becomes  of  her  so  himself  can   but   enjoy 
health  and  prosperity  ;  whose  carriage  to  her   is  churlish,  and  h's 
cxpresssions  to  her  dipped  in  gall  and  vinegar  ;  that   exposes  her 
natural  defects  before  company,  and  aggravates  her  neglects,  which 
should  be  qualified  with  softer  constructions  ;  that,  instead  of  com 
forting  her,  slights  her,  and  is  so  far  from  healing  her  wounds   that 
he  doth  what  he  can  to  make  them  wider  ;  that  doth  not  allow  her 
convenient  food  and   raiment,  and   lets  her  want   those   necessary 
supplies  which  the  law  of  nations  binds  him  to  ;  that  doth  not  pro 
tect  her  when  she  is  in  danger,  nor  redeem  her  from  the  malice  and 
cruelty  of  those  that  use  all  means  to  disparage  her  ;  that  doth  not 
trust  her  with  the  affairs  of  the  family,  if  she   be   able  to  manage 
them,  or  conceals  from  her  the  things  which  appertain  to  their  com 
mon  safety  ;  that  goes  beyond   the   bounds  of  the   authority   God 
hath  given  him  over  her,  and,  instead  of  being  her  head,  makes  him 
self  a  tyrant  and  her  a  slave  ;  that  doth  not  yield  unto  her  reason 
able  requests,  and  by   his   good  example  encourage  her  to   piety, 
gravity,  chanty  and  discretion  ;  that  despises  her  good  counsel,  and 
will  be  sooner  pursuaded  by  a  stranger  or  idle  companion,  than  by 
her  that  lies  in  his  bosom  ;  that  laughs  at  her  devotion,   and  takes 
pains  to  make  her  weary  of  her  seriousness;  that   takes   it  ill   she 
should  obey  God  more  than  him,  and  thinks  nothing  so  tedious  as 
her  frequent  exhorting  of  him  to  universal  conscientiousness.   Such 
a  man  for  certain  doth   not   exercise   himself  unto  Godliness,  but 
rather  strives  to  work  himself  out  of  the  obligations  to   it,  and  ex 
cises  himself  unto  hardness  of  heart  and  impenitence. 

"  And,  indeed,  the  same  may  be  said  of  the  woman  that  doth 
not  discharge  the  duty  of  a  wife,  if  married  to  a  husband.  If  her 
religion  deserve  this  name  of  exercising  herself  unto  Godliness,  her 
care  must  be,  according  to  the  Aoostle's  rule,  to  reverence 


346  PROPOSAL   AND    ESPOUSAL. 

her  husband.  After  him  must  be  her  desire,  it  must  be  her  glory 
to  submit  to  him  in  the  fear  of  God.  In  her  mind  she  must  esteem 
and  value  him  as  the  image  and  glory  of  the  great  Creator.  To 
love  him  must  become  natural  to  her  ;  and  to  tend  him,  though 
ever  so  weak  and  calamitous,  must  be  one  great  part  of  her  care. 
Her  conversation  must  be  chaste,  and  the  value  she  hath  for  him 
must  appear  in  her  words  and  actions.  She  must  fear  him  as  her 
master,  and  yet  nothing  must  cause  that  fear  but  affection.  She 
must  deny  herself  for  him,  and  in  things  indifferent  his  will  must 
be  her  rule  to  go  by.  Her  submission  must  be  hearty,  and  it  must 
not  be  any  sinister  respect,  but  conscience,  that  must  produce  it. 
She  must  waive  her  privileges  that  birth  and  breeding  have  given 
her,  and  honor  him  according  to  the  law  of  him  that  joined  them. 
Her  study  must  be  to  make  his  life  comfortable,  and  she  must  con 
trive  soft  expressions  to  engage  his  inclinations.  Her  language  to 
him  must  be  mild  and  peaceable,  and  her  behavior  such  as  becomes 
a  woman  that  professes  Godliness.  Her  conversation  must  be  the 
same  in  his  absence  that  it  is  in  his  presence  ;  and  she  must  give 
him  such  demonstration  of  her  kindness  that  his  heart  may  confide 
in  her.  To  get  a  meek  and  quiet  spirit  must  not  be  the  least  part 
of  her  prayer,  and  indolence  and  haughtiness  of  spirit  she  must 
shun  as  the  pestilence.  She  must  be  a  stranger  to  brawling,  and 
her  words  must  be  weighed  in  a  balance.  She  must  flee  idleness  as 
an  enemy,  and  contrive  how  to  advance  her  husband's  interest  with 
honesty.  She  must  encourage  her  servants  to  their  labor,  and 
guide  them  by  her  eye.  Her  feet  must  not  be  much  in  the  streets, 
and  she  must  remember  it  was  an  answer  fit  to  be  given  to  an 
angel,  that  Sarah  was  in  her  tent.  Her  cars  must  be  open  to  her 
husband's  counsel,  and  she  must  not  think  much  of  his  reproof, 
and  reprehension.  The  entertainment  she  gives  him,  must  be  with 
a  cheerful  'countenance,  and  crossness  of  humor  must  be  banished 
from  her  temper." 


^^^^^^^^ 

«b  ^<Hfct*rtfcl^^^*4M^^^^  -^ 


WRONG  BEGINNINGS   IN   MARRIED  LIFE. 


first  word  of  this  heading  should  make  us  shudder, 
and  the  second  should  increase  the  tremor,  for  what  is 
so  dreadful  as  wrong?  and  what  so  disastrous  as  a 
wrong  beginning?  determining  a  faulty  course  all  the 
way  through.  Man  began  wrong  in  Eden,  and  behold 
the  dire  result.  A  little  turn  to  the  right  01;  left — eve  i  the  slightest 
divergence  from  a  straight  course  at  the  first,  what  a  world  of  dif 
ference  it  makes  in  the  end  ?  See  those  two  railway  trains  leaving 
the  depot.  For  a  time  they  run  parallel  with  each  other,  but  wait  till 
they  come  at  the  switches  and  enter  on  the  declining  curves  and 
then  see  how  far  apart  they  sever  and  drive  wide  leagues  asunder. 
There  are  switches  all  along  in  life  to  run  us  off  from  the  "  Main 
Line  "  of  righteousness,  and  prevent  an  even  and  equitable  course, 
and  to  bring  us  to  a  "dead  lock"  on  the  side  line  of  vanity,  vexa 
tion  and  confusion.  Let  us  then  pray,  and  especially  when  enter 
ing  upon  new  and  important  relations,  that  we  may  not  be  led  into, 
but  away  from,  temptation,  and  delivered  from  evil  or  the  evil  one. 

In  riding  along  on  the  cars  once  upon  a  time,  \vc  hoard  the 
conductor  call  out  "Forks."  On  looking  out  of  the  car  window, 
we  found  the  place  took  its  name  from  a  "fork"  in  the  road;  and 
we  thought  the  cry  might  very  appropriately  be  raised  at  a  thous 
and  points  in  domestic  life,  "  Forks  !"  For  we  arc  ever  coining  "  iit 


317 


34$  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

a  place  where  two  roads  meet,"  and  continually  called  upon  to 
decide  which  we  shall  take,  and  upon  that  choice  (often,  too,  made 
suddenly)  depends  the  marring  or  making  of  our  wedded  career. 
Beware  of  the  cross  roads.  Temptation  stands  like  a  wily  guide  at 
the  head  of  every  way  to  direct  us  whither  we  should  not  go  ;  even 
as  the  Serpent  met  Eve  under  the  forbidden  tree,  and  as  Satan 
stood  at  Joshua's  right  hand  to  resist  him. 

Be  well  aware, 
Each  wedded  pair, 
How  ye  begin, 
Nor  start  in  sin. 

With  grace  your  guide, 
In  love  abide  ; 
Be  God  your  stay, 
Now  and  alway. 


\\  c  have  heard  of  a  prominent  member  of  a  church  in  Kingston, 
N.  Y.,  who  the  other  Sunday  went  early  to  church,  and,  in  a  fit  of  ab 
straction,  took  a  seat  in  the  pew  just  ahead  of  his  own.  The  next 
person  that  came  in,  knowing  that  his  pew  was  the  one  ahead  of 
the  prominent  member's,  also  sat  in  the  wrong  pew.  Every  one 
that  came  in  afterwards  pursued  a  similar  line  of  argument,  and,  in 
consequence,  that  morning  everybody  on  that  side  of  the  church 
was  in  the  wrong  pew.  The  man  who  occupied  the  front  seat 
thought  "  his  pew"  didn't  look  natural,  but  as  Brother  B.  was  just 
behind  him,  it  wasn't  possible  he  himself  could  be  mistaken." 


A  certain  lady  tells  us  how  she  once  learnt  a  lesson  in  the  barn- 
She  says  :— "  It  was  a  frosty  morning.       I  was  looking  out 
of  a  window  into  the  barnyard,   where  a  great   many  cows,  oxen, 


WRONG    BEGINNINGS.  349 

and  horses  were  waiting  to  be  watered.  For  a  while  they  all  stood 
very  quiet  and  still.  Presently  one  of  the  cows,  in  attempting  to 
turn  around,  happened  to  hit  her  next  neighbor.  In  a  moment 
this  cow  kicked  and  hit  her  neighbour.  She  passed  on  the  kick 
and  the  hit  to  the  next.  And  directly  the  whole  herd  were  kicking 
and  hitting  each  other  with  great  fury.  I  said  to  myself,  '  See  what 
comes  ot  kicking  when  you  are  hit.'  " 

The  following  Persian  fable  contains   an   excellent   hint,  which 
may  be  taken  to  advantage  in  more  ways  than  one  : 

A  holy  dervise  once  a  crystal  cup, 
Owned  by  the  Prophet,  carefully  took  up, 
When — from  some  sudden  impulse,  turning  round- 
It  fell,  and  lay  in  fragments  on  the  ground. 

A  son  (that  moment  blessed,  and  prayed  from  harm) 

Upon  the  threshold  fell  and  broke  his  arm  ; — 

A  caravan  to  Mecca  passing  by, 

The  holy  dervise,  with  kind  words,  drew  nigh. 

And  stroked  a  sacred  camel,  who,  as  quick 
As  thought,  returned  his  kindness  with  a  kick ! 
Grieved  and  amazed  he  for  a  moment  stands, 
Then  cries  :   "  This  day  began  with  unwashed  hands  !" 

We  hasten  forth  some  morning  to  the  world, 
And  find  our  cup  of  joy  to  fragments  hurled  ; 
Some  looked  for  pleasure  turned  to  bitter  woe, 
Some  oroffered  kindness  answered  with  a  blow. 

We,  baffled,  like  the  dervise,  questioning,  stare, 
Then  cry,  «  This  day  began  without  a  prayer  !" 

—Mrs.  J.  P.  Ballard. 


350  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

The  beginning  of  strife  is  as  the  letting  out  of  water,   therefore 
leave  off  contention  before  it  be  meddled  with. — Solomon. 


"DRIVE    GENTLY   OVER   THE    STONES." 

This  piece  of  advice,  which  is  frequently  given  to  inexperienced 
whips,  may  be  respectfully  suggested  to  the  newly-married.  There 
are  stony  places  on  the  road  to  happiness,  which,  if  not  carefully 
driven  over,  may  upset  the  domestic  coach.  The  first  rock  ahead 
which  should  be  marked  "dangerous"  is  the  first  year  of  married 
life.  Here,  especially,  it  is  the  first  step  that  costs  ;  as  a  rule,  the 
first  year  cither  mars  or  makes  a  marriage.  During  this  period 
errors  may  be  committed  which  will  cast  a  shadow  over  every  year 
that  follows. 

On  awakening  suddenly  from  sleep  we  feel  put   out   and   rather 
cross.      May  not  a  young  husband  and  wife  experience  feelings  not 
entirely  different  when  they  awake  to  reality  from   the  dreams  of 
courtship  and  the  fascination  of  the  honeymoon  ?   Everything  must 
once  more  be  contemplated  after  the  ordinary  manner  of  the  world, 
once  more  with  subdued  feelings  spoken  of,  considered  and  settled. 
For  the  first  time,  husband  and  wife  see  each  other  as  they  actually 
are.       Each  brings  certain  peculiarities  into  the   married   state,  to 
which  the  other  has  to  grow  accustomed.     They  have  now  to  live 
no  longer  for  themselves,  but  for  each  other,  and  the  lesson  is  not 
learned  in  a  moment.       In  all   things  indifferent  the  husband  and 
wife  must  be  willing  to  yield,   however  new   it  may  be  to  them — 
however  different  from  what  they  themselves  thought.       Self  must 
be  sacrificed  in  order  thereby  to  gain  the  help   of  another  beloved 
existence.     A  lady  once  asked  Dr.  Johnson  how,  in  his  dictionary, 
he  came  to  define  pastern  the  knee  of  a  horse  ;  he  immediately  an 
swered,  "  Ignorance,  madam,  pure  ignorance."      This  is  the  simple 
explanation  of  many  an  accident  that  takes  place  at  the  commence- 


WRONG    BEGINNINGS.  351 

men  t  of  the  matrimonial  journey.  The  young  people  have  not 
yet  learned  the  dangerous  places  of  the  road,  and,  as  a  consequence, 
they  drive  carelessly  over  them.  —  The  Quiver. 


IIOW    WINE    BECOMES    SOUR. 

Newly-married  people  are  generally  warned  by  their  more  ex 
perienced  elders  to  beware  of  their  first  dispute  ;  and  certainly  a 
want  of  self-restraint  mars  home  life  more  than  anything  else.  Still 
"  it's  hardly  in  a  body's  power  to  keep  at  times  from  being  sour," 
and  we  must  not  attach  undue  importance  to  the  little  tiffs  of  early 
married  life.  Generally  speaking,  there  is  not  much  fault  on  cither 
side.  Some  men  are  inclined  to  be  cross  in  the  early  morning,  or 
on  returning  home  in  the  evening,  because  their  minds  arc  intent 
on  unpalatable  items.  in  the  day's  business.  Forewarned  is  fore 
armed  ;  the  fact  that  it  is  so  should  be  duly  recognized,  and  nothing 
done  to  ruffle  or  annoy  them.  It  is  a  great  mistake  for  a  man,  in 
his  early  married  life,  to  be  overdone  with  domesticity.  The  young 
wife,  if  she  is  wise,  does  not  insist  on  her  husband  giving  up  his 
club,  male  friends,  and  all  the  interests  of  bachelorship.  She  pro 
bably,  is  quite  content  with  his  company  alone,  but  she  is  aware 
that  a  man  is  apt  to  weary  of  the  touj  ours  per  drix.  Appearances 
should  not  be  disregarded  in  home  life  ;  husbands  attach  much  im 
portance  to  what  others  think  of  their  wives  and  their  homes.  It 
is  a  part  of  the  science  of  home  life  to  present  a  good  face  to  the 
world  ;  it  argues  bad  housekeeping  to  be  seen  at  a  disadvantage. 
At  the  same  time  the  young  wife  must  never  dwindle  down  into 
a  mere  housekeeper  and  head  nurse,  with  a  spice  of  the  dressmaker. 
She  must  keep  her  place  as  a  companion. 

A  good  wife  is  a  priceless  treasure  ;  and  a  husband  is  none  tho 
worse  that  he  is  made  to  realize  she  is  a  lady,  and  to  be  treated  as 
such.  —  The  Quiver. 


352  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

HARD    BEGINNINGS. 

It  has  passed  into  a  proverb,  that  "all  things  arc  hard  at  the 
beginning;"  but  if  the  beginning  be  good,  "the  latter  end  shall 
greatly  increase  "  for,  in  the  language  of  "  Plantation  Philosophy," 

"  It  'peers  dat  all  through  life  de  hardest  thing  to  do  is  de  bes' 
arter  it  am  done.  It  takes  the  harder'  sorter  work  ter  split  er  knotty 
niece  o'  wood,  but  arter  it  is  split  it  makes  de  bes'  fire." 

And  we  have  oftentimes  observed   the  truth   of  the  following 

o ' 

from  the  same  quaint,  philosophical  pen  : 

"  De  wildes'  man  sometimes  becomes  de  quietest  citizen.  Dar 
ain't  nothin'  more  skittish  then  a  young  deer,  but  once  ketch  him 
an'  he  is  de  easies'  thing  in  de  worl'  ter  tame." 


THE    TWO    DOMESTIC    HEARS. 

It  has  been  well  said  that  every  house  should  have  two  bears  in 
it  —  bear  and  forbear.  These  will  prevent  the  intrusion  of  all  other 
bears  that  might  otherwise  molest  and  destroy  family  concord. 


NEVER   QUARREL. 

Husbands  and  wives  !  husbands  and  wives! 

As  you  value  the  peace  and  content  of  your  lives, 

Avoid,  as  a  pest,  the  beginning  of  sin, 

And  each  be  the  first,  not  the  last,  to  "give  in." 

O  !  death  to  all  concord,  suicidal  strife  ! 
Where  quarrels  obtain  betwixt  husband  and  wife  ; 
And  hands  that  were  joined  in  the  holiest  rite, 
Unclasp  in  defiance  —  half  challenge  to  fight. 

What  a  loser  is  he  in  such  conflict  who  wins 
'Tis  the  bootless  dispute  of  the  Siamese  twins  ; 


WRONG    BEGINNINGS.  353 

Fast  bound  by  integument  nothing  can  sever, 
And  loving,  or  loathing,  still  cleaving  forever. 

O,  foolish  the  man,  a  mere  human  elf! 
Who  refuses  to  nourish  and  cherish  himself; 
Who  spurns  his  own  flesh,  but  increases  his  pains, 
Augmenting  his  loss  by  the  score  of  his  gains. 


A   PLEASANT   QUARREL. 

The  following  remarkable  quarrel,  between  two  betrothed  per 
sons,  may  furnish  a  suggestion  to  the  newly  married  pair  to  never 
let  their  disputes  exceed  the  same  in  acrimony,  and  then  "  the  more 
the  better  "  :— 

"  Mary,"  asked  the  young  lady's  mother  at  breakfast,  "  what 
was  the  matter  with  you  and  Harry  in  the  parlor  last  evening  ?" 

"  Why,  mamma?     What?"  inquired  the  daughter,  demurely. 

"Why  you  lowered  and  quarrelled  for  half  an  hour  like  a  pair 
of  pickpockets." 

"  Oh,"  she  replied,  remembering  the  circumstances,  "  I  Tarry 
wanted  me  to  take  the  big  chair,  and  I  wanted  him  to  take  it  be 
cause  he  was  company,  you  know." 

"  How  did  you  settle  it  finally  ?" 

"  Well,  mamma,  we — we — we  compromised,  and  both  of  us 
took  it.:> 

A   FOOISH    QUARREL. 

The  shepherd  came  down  from  the  Crcffcl  steep, 

For  the  weather  was  cold  and  rough  ; 
"  Gudewife,"  said  he,  "  I  have  faulded  the  sheep 
And  I'm  hungry  and  cold  enough. 


354  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

But,  oh,  its  a  pleasure,  when  duty's  done, 

With  your  canny  wee  wife  to  bide  ;" 
"Gudcman,  ye  ken  that  your  dinner  is  won, 
And  this  is  your  ain  fireside. 

There  is  aitmcal  cake  and  dish  of  broth, 

And  there  isna  a  better  thing." 
"There's  naebody  asks  a  better,  in  troth 

The  dish  is  a  dish  for  a  king. 
Gic  me  barley  broth  and  a  bit  of  cake, 

It  will  always  for  me  suffice." 
"I  dinna  see  how  such  a  slip  ye  make, 
The  broth  isna  barley — its  rice  /" 

"I  say  it's  barley."     "  I  say  its  not, 

And  I  made  it  and  ought  to  ken  ; 
But  I'll  haud  me  tongue,  I  had  most  forgot 

It's  nonsense  to  reason  wi'  men." 
"Never  mind,  gudewife,  for  the  broth  is  good 

// — is — barley, — let  that  suffice." 
''Gudeman,  I  will  hae  this  thing  understood, 

It — is — not  barley, — Its  rice  !" 

So  the  quarrel  grew  on  this  simple  plea, 

And  grew  hotter  from  day  to  day, 
Till  each  in  the  other  no  good  could  see, 

And  the  shepherd  went  far  away. 
For  'tis  trifles  that  mar  our  Love  and  Life, 

But  trifles  beyond  all  price  ; 
And  little  cares  then  the  sorrowing  wife 

If  the  broth  were  barley  or  rice. 

And  far  away  in  the  Indian  land, 
Remorse  in  his  heart  had  her  will  ; 


WRONG    BEGINNINGS.  355 

He  thought  of  the  day  Jean  gave  him  her  hand, 

He  thought  of  his  cot  on  the  hill  ; 
He  thought  of  the  good  Scotch  broth  and  cake, 

(Ah,  me  !  these  were  things  beyond  price,) 
And  said,  "  If  Jean  only  broth  could  make, 

I'd  be  willing  to  call  it  —  rice'' 

So  back  he  went  after  many  years, 

Went  back  to  his  wife  with  a  kiss  ; 
And  she  kissed  him  again  through  happy  tears, 

And  said  in  her  humble  bliss, 
"Gudeman,  in  your  broth  whatever  you  find, 

Whether  barley,  or  rice,  or  peas, 
Just  sup  it  wi'  me,  we  are  both  of  one  mind, 

You  may  call  it  whatever  you  please  !" 

They  learned  to  forbear,  they  learned  to  agree, 

And  were  happy  for  love's  sweet  sake  ; 
There  wasn't  such  broth  in  the  North  Countree 

As  Jean  for  her  husband  could  make. 
But  somehow  to  barley  she  always  stuck  ; 

She  said  —  "  There's  a  differ  in  price, 
And  rice  never  brought  me  aught  but  ill  luck 

And  sae  I  use  barley  —  not  rice  1" 


When  souls  that  should  agree  to  will  the  same, 
To  have  one  common  object  for  their  wishes, 
Look  different  ways,  regardless  of  each  other, 
Think  what  a  train  of  wretchedness  ensues  !  —  Rowe. 


MUTUAL     ACCOMMODATION. 

If  thy  wife  is  small,  bend  down  to  her  and  whisper  in  her  ear. 
Talmud. 


PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

THE     VALUE     OF     PATIENCE. 
11  Duke  : 

What  comfort  do  you  find  in  being  so  calm  ? 
Candida  : 

That  which  green  wounds  receive  from  sovereign  balm. 

Patience,  my  lord  !  why,  'tis  the  soul  of  peace  ; 

Of  all  the  virtues  'tis  the  nearest  kin  to  heaven  : 

It  makes  men  look  like  gods.     The  best  of  men 

That  e'er  wore  earth  about  him  was  a  sufferer, 

A  soft,  meek,  patient,  humble,  tranquil  spirit— 

The  first  true  gentleman  that  ever  breathed. 

The  stock  of  patience,  then,  cannot  be  poor  ; 

All  it  desires  it  has  :  what  award  more  ? 

It  is  the  greatest  enemy  to  strife 

That  can  be,  for  it  doth  embrace  all  wrongs, 

And  so  chains  up  lawyers'  and  women's  tongues  ; 

Tis  the  perpetual  prisoner's  liberty— 

His  walks  and  orchards  ;  'tis  the  bondslave's  freedom, 

And  makes  him  seem  proud  of  his  iron  chain, 

As  though  he  wore  it  more  for  state  than  pain. 

It  is  the  beggars  music,  and  thus  sings — 

Although  their  bodies  beg,  they  yet  are  kings. 

O,  my  dread  liege  !  it  is  the  sap  of  bliss 

Bears  us  aloft,  makes  men  and  angels  kiss  ; 

And  last  of  all,  to  end  a  household  strife, 

It  is  the  honey  'gainst  a  waspish  wife." 


ALWAYS   LOOK    AT   THE    BRIGHT   SIDE. 

Do  you  ever  play  at  making  believe  ? 

Tis  the  merriest  play  I  know, 
With  the  power  a  magic  spell  to  weave, 
However  the  wind  may  blow. 


WRONG    BEGINNINGS.  357 

If  you've  only  a  simple  cotton  gown, 

A  little  the  worse  for  wear, 
Just  make  believe  that  in  all  the  town 

There  isn't  a  dress  so  fair. 

Instead  of  faded  and  scanty  folds 

You  may  fancy  its  rustling  silk, 
A  warp  that  lustre  of  moonlight  holds, 

And  a  woof  that  is  white  as  milk. 

You  may  "  make  believe  "  with  a  bit  of  bread 

And  a  cup  of  wrater  poured, 
That  you  sit  with  case  at  a  royal  spread, 

Nor  lack  at  the  festal  board. 

The  people  who  "  make  believe  "  aright 

Shorten  the  longest  day  ; 
Brighten  the  gloomiest  hours  \vith  light, 

And  laugh  their  troubles  away. 

It's  always  foolish  to  sigh  and  shirk  ; 
If  anything  must  be  done, 

With  an  earnest  purpose  turn  the  work- 
To  a  "  make  believe  "  of  fun. 

And  if  only  you  try  this  "  make  believe," 

The  cheeriest  play  I  know, 
You'll  find  that  a  magic  spell  'twill  weave 

However  the  wind  may  blow. 

—Mary  E  Sangster,  in  Congregationalist. 


MANAGING    HUSBANDS. 


ALL    THE    LABOR    OF   A    MAN    IS    FOR   HIS    MOUTH." 


m 


,r 


HERE  is  nothing  on  earth  fetches  a  man  like  a  good 
dinner  and  a  well  dressed  wife  presiding.  The  hus- 
&S  band  who  can  look  forward  to  such  a  state  ot  things 
every  day  of  his  life  will  never  tire  of  home,  and  the 
wife  who  studies  his  comfort  will  have  little  difficulty  in 
managing  him  according  to  her  will.  Men  are  gregarious 
animals,  and  will  wander  in  spite  of  all  allurements,  but  they  are 
selfish  enough  to  remain  where  they  arc  best  treated,  and  by  taking 
a  little  trouble  for  a  year  or  two  of  married  life,  the  years  that  fol 
low  will,  as  a  rule,  find  the  husband  always  glad  to  go  back  to  the 
pretty  home  where  smiles  await  him  and  the  dinner  I  spoke  of. 
There  are  so  many  women  who  object  to  being  "  bossed,"  as  they 
call  it.  My  dear  ladies,  you  can  always  be  boss  if  you  take  the 
trouble.  By  giving  in,  you  can  get  your  own  way,  as  you  never 
would  by  fighting  for  it.  And,  after  all,  it  is  better  to  feel  you  respect 
your  husband  so  much  that  to  give  in  to  him  is  not  a  difficulty. 

Nine  men  out  of  ten  are  manageable  if  you  go  the  right  way 
about  it,  and  one  great  point  is  to  act  after  marriage  just  as  you 
did  before.  Argument  and  contradiction  are  vital  enemies  to  mar- 

358 


MANAGING    HUSBANDS.  359 

ried  peace.  Should  you  wish  for  anything  particularly,  don't  insist 
upon  it  after  refusal.  Some  women  are  persistent  and  ask  : 
may  I  not  ?  Why  don't  you  do  as  I  tell  you  ?"  and  irritate  the  man. 
Rather  bide  your  time  and  make  an  extra  good  dinner  of  his  favor 
ite  dishes,  put  a  bow  on  of  the  color  he  likes,  make  home  and  your 
self  sweeter  than  ever.  You'll  get  it  sure,  even  if  you  have  to  wait. 
Also  when  you  want  him  to  do  any  particular  thing,  which  you 
know  will  be  for  his  good,  for  heaven's  sake  do  not  say 
Rather  drop  a  hint  that  you  think  so  and  so  would  be  a  good  thing 
to  do.  Get  him  interested  and  then  let  the  subject  drop.  I  venture 
to  say  that  in  a  short  time  that  man  will  do  precisely  as  you  wished 
He  will  never  permit  you  to  think  that  he  has  traded  the  least  on 
your  common  sense. — San  Francisco  Xei^s  Letter. 


We  find  that,  physiologically,  or  in  the  construction   of  the  hu 
man  body,  the  stomach  and  heart  lie  in   very  close   neighborhoo 
as  though  even  nature  herself  would  give  the  clue  to  the  nearest  way 
home,  i.  e.  to  the  affections,  and  the  following  light   couplet  is  not 
without  weighty  significance,  which  thus  runs  in  lively  measure  : 
"The  turnpike  road  to  people's  hearts,  I  find, 
Lies  through  their  mouth,  or  I  mistake  mankind.' 


COOKING     HUSBANDS. 


A  receipt  for  "  cooking  husbands  "  comes  to  us  from  a  Women's 
Rights  Convention,  held  in    Michigan,   which,   notwithstanding 
flippancy,  contains  some  wholesome  truths.     We  take  the  following 
selections  : 

"  A  good  many  husbands  are  spoiled  by  mismanagement.  Some 
women  let  their  husbands  freeze  by  their  carelessness  and  indiffer 
ence.  Some  keep  them  in  a  stew  by  irritating  words  and  way* 


PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

others  keep  them  in  pickle  all  their  lives.  It  cannot  be  supposed 
that  any  husband  will  be  tender  and  good  managed  in  this  way, 
but  they  are  really  delicious  when  properly  treated.  In  selecting 
\our  husband  you  should  not  be  guided  by  the  silvery  appearance 
as  in  buying  mackerel,  nor  by  the  golden  tint,  as  if  you  wanted 
salmon.  Be  sure  to  select  him  yourself,  as  tastes  differ.  Do  not 
go  to  market  for  him,  as  the  best  are  always  brought  to  your  door. 
See  that  the  linen  in  which  you  wrap  your  husband  is  nicely  washed 
and  mended,  with  the  required  number  of  buttons  and  strings  nice 
ly  sewed  on.  Make  a  steady  fire  of  love,  neatness 
and  cheerfulness.  Set  him  as  near  to  this  as  seems  to  agree 
with  him.  Add  a  little  sugar  in  the  form  of  what  confectioners 
call  kisses,  but  no  vinegar  or  pepper  on  any  account.  A  little 
spice  improves  them,  but  it  must  be  used  with  judgment.  Do  not 
stick  any  sharp  instrument  into  him  to  sec  if  he  is  becoming  tender. 
You  cannot  fail  to  know  when  he  is  done." 

This  cooking  a  husband  may  do  very  well  as  a  fruitful  topic  of 
discussion  for  voluble  beauties  to  descant  upon  ;  but  we  would 
modestly  suggest  that  the  best  way  to  prepare  him  is  to  cook  well 
for  him.  It  may  be  a  humbling  thought,  but  it  is  nevertheless 
strictly  true  that  the  felicities,  or  infelicities,  of  married  life  depend 
in  no  small  degree  upon  the  table.  Unpalatable  food  is  to  a  large 
extent  unprofitable  food.  Relish  is  the  best  sauce,  and  gustation  is 
not  to  be  ignored  as  a  fine  ingredient  in  the  oft-lifted  cup  of  ter 
restrial  happiness. 

O  !  it  makes  one  almost  tremble  as  we  think  how  completely 
man  is  thrown,  in  this  regard,  on  the  mercy  of  the  woman,  and 
how  the  comfort,  or  discomfort,  of  life  sums  up  in  the  aggregate 
from  this  source  alone.  Every  meal — and  a  man  eats  about  a 
thousand  in  a  year,  and  consumes  his  own  weight  in  victuals  about 
once  a  month — will  tend  to  sour  or  to  sweeten  his  temper  and  dis 
position.  Every  baking,  O  ye  bevies  of  blithe  partners,  has  in  it 
the  seeds  of  domestic  pleasure  or  bitterness. 


MANAGING    HUSBANDS. 


Bread  is  the  "  staff  of  life,"  and  the  maiden  that  has  reached 
woman's  estate  without  knowing  how  to  make  a  good  :<  batch  "  of 
the  very  "stay"  of  human  existence,  ought  to  be  no  candidate  for 
a  marriage  ring.  It  has  been  wisely  hinted  that  the  gentleman  who 
affirmed  that  "  love  was  enough,"  made  the  assertion  after  a  full 
meal  —  "  a  big  dinner." 

A  certain  facetious  and  hyperbolical  writer  makes  a  plain,  but 
useful,  domestic  servant  to  enter  paradise  through  the  possession  of 
one  virtue   alone,   namely,   the  art  of  good  cookery,  the  sentinel 
saint  telling  her  to  "come  right  in,   for   she  has   saved    more  men 
from  perdition  than  a  dozen  missionaries."      Now  under  this  some 
what  questionable  way  of  presenting  it,  we  find  a  needful  truth  con 
tained,  namely,  that  skilful  cooks  are  a  great  blessing  to  the  world 
and  that  were  there   more   of  them  there  would   be  fewer  strong 
constitutions  weakened,  fewer  good  men   crippled   in   their  useful 
ness  in  Zion,  fewer  sinners  almost  hopelessly  soured  against  dc 
through  the  horrors  of  dyspepsia,   and   fewer  human   wreck 
along  the  coast  of  the  sea  of  life. 

We  have  heard  of  a  quaint   divine,   who,   when   asked  to  " 
-race  "  over  a  dinner  of  pork  and  vegetables,  said.     "  Lord,  i 
canst  bless  under  the  gospel  what  thou  didst  curse  under  1 
bless  this  pig."       So,  over  many  a  cook-ruined  meal   we   mig 
"asking  a  blessing,"  put  in  a  qualifying  clause,  and  say, 
thou  canst  see  good  to  work  a  miracle,  bless  this   spoiled  fooc 


our  use. 


Now  as  no  one  can  bear  rule  so  well  as  he  that  has  first  obeyed, 
so  no  person  discerns  so  clearly  what  should  be  done  as  1 
done  the  same. 

A  housekeeper  must  know  ere  she  can  command  to  do.     What 
esteem,  pray,  or  even  partial  respect,  can  a  domestic  servant 
for  her  mistress  who  is  so  ignorant  of  household  matters,  and  oft 
mysteries  of  the  culinary  art,  that  in  her  orders  at  the  shambles  si 


362  PROPOSAL   AND    ESPOUSAL. 

includes  in  the  strange  list  a  "leg  of  tongue,"  as  was  done  by  ,1 
young  wife  some  time  ago  ;  or  when  her  husband  desires  savory 
"sweet  bread,"  she  calls  upon  the  baker  for  it;  or  who  orders  a 
number  of  pheasants,  hares  and  partridges  to  be  brought  home  for 
the  purpose  of  perserving  them,  she  having  heard  of  the  excellency 
of  the  English  game  preserves  ;  and  when  selecting  a  ham  out  of  a 
dozen  or  so  that  hang  in  range  along  the  wall,  she  innocently  asks 
if  they  are  all  from  one  pig  ;  or.  finding  the  milk  on  one  auspicious 
morning  sweeter  than  usual,  she  conceives  the  idea  of  laying  in  a 
good  supply  while  she  has  the  opportunity,  and  so  buys  enough  for 
a  week  ? 

Remember  the  proverbs,  ye  young  brides,  that  "a  fair  face  does 
not  sweeten  a  spoilt  dinner,  nor  a  gay  dress  an  ugly  temper,"  and 
"  Prettiness  makes  no  pottage  ;"  and  also,  "  A  man  must  ask  his 
wife's  leave  before  he  can  prosper,  for  a  man's  best  fortune  or  his 
worst  is  his  wife." 

On  the  other  hand  "  Many  blame  the  wife  for  their  own  shift 
less  life,  and  it  is  true  that  "  All  women  are  good— they  are  good 
for  something  or  good  for  nothing,  and  their  dress  usually  shows 
which  it  is."  "A  good  wife  is  the  gift  of  a  good  God,  and  the  work 
manship  of  a  good  husband."  "As  the  good  man  saith,  so  say  we  ; 
but  as  the  good  woman  saith  so  it  must  be."  "The  obedient  wife 
comands  her  husband  ;  the  disobedient  wife  cannot  command  her- 
"Beauty  in  a  woman  is  like  the  flowers  in  spring  ;  but  virtue 
is  like  the  stars  in  heaven."  "  There  is  many  a  good  wife  who  can 
not  sing  and  dance  well."  "  He  that  hath  a  bad  wife  has  purgatory 
for  a  neighbor  ;  but  says  Solomon  the  wise,  "  a  good  wife  is  a  good 
prize."  "The  foolish  woman  is  known  by  her  finery."  "A  wiie  is 
better  chosen  by  the  ear  than  by  the  eye." 


THE  WIFE  A  SISTER. 


J»N  a  spiritual  sense,  every  man's  wife  is  his  sister — sister, 
friend,  lover,  and  partner  in  one.  The  husband  has  no 
dominion  over  his  wife's  faith.  His  authority  stops  at 
the  conscience.  Every  one  must  give  an  account  of 
himself  or  herself  to  God.  For  we  must  all  stand  before 
the  judgment  seat  of  Christ  ;  all  relationships  cease  at 
death,  and  therefore  we  all  should  live  in  relation  to  the  future.  The 
marriage  only  lasts  "  till  death  do  us  part." 

We  have  a  fine  illustration  of  the  acknowledgement  of  the  sev 
eral  or  separate  and  independent  state  of  the  individual  soul,  even 
when  in  the  married  state,  in  the  Apocrypha,  where  the  nuptial 
bond  is  sealed  with  solemn  prayer  by  Tobias  and  his  young  bride, 
who  after  that  they  were  both  shut  in  together,  Tobias  rose  from  his 
couch  and  said,  "  Sister,  arise,  and  let  us  pray  that  God  would  have 
pity  upon  us."  Then  began  Tobias  to  say,  "  Blessed  art  Thou,  O 
God  of  our  fathers,  and  blessed  is  thy  holy  and  glorious  name  for 
ever.  Let  the  heavens  bless  thee,  and  all  thy  creatures.  Thou 
madest  Adam,  and  gavest  him  Eve  his  wife  for  a  helper  and  stay  ; 
of  them  came  mankind.  Thou  hast  said  it  is  not  good  that  man 
should  be  alone,  let  us  make  unto  him  an  aid  like  unto  himself. 
And  now,  O  Lord,  I  take  not  this  my  sister  for  lust,  but  uprightly, 
therefore  mercifully  ordain  that  we  may  become  aged  together." 

And  she  said  with  him,  "  Amen." 

aes 


364  PROPOSAL   AND    ESPOUSAL. 

So  the  Patriarchs,  Abraham  and  Isaac,  in  a  double  entendre, 
called  their  wives,  respectively,  "sisters,"  history  strangely  repeat 
ing  itself  after  ninety  years.  (See  Genesis  xx.  2,  and  xxvi.  7.) 

The  word  sister  was  sometimes  used  for  any  near  and  dear  rela 
tive  of  the  fair  sex  ;  even  as  "  nephew  "  for  one  of  the  stronger  sex. 

The  church  is  Christ's  sister  in  respect  of  his  humanity.  "  For 
as  the  children  arc  partakers  of  flesh  and  blood,  he  likewise  himself 
took  part  of  the  same." 

And  coming  in  the  spirit  to  the  Jewish  church,  as  a  belated 
\vayfarerseckingadmittancc,  he  cries  pathetically,  "  Open  to  me, 
my  sister,  my  dove,  my  love,  my  undefilcd,  for  my  head  is  filled 
with  dew  and  my  locks  with  the  drops  of  the  night."  —  Canticles. 

So  the  Jewish  and  Gentile  churches  are  sisters.  "  For  we  have  a 
little  sister.  *  *  What  shall  we  do  for  our  sister  in 

the  .'ay  when  she  shall  be  spoken  for"—Cautic/es.     And  so,  indeed, 
all  true  churches  are  sisters  :  for  "  ye  are  all  one   in  Christ  Jesus." 

—  ^m  — 

"Mine  eyes  have  seen  the  beautiful, 

Mine  ears  have  heard  their  thrilling  voice, 
My  heart  has  felt  their  potent  rule— 

The  fears  of  hope,  the  hope  of  joys— 
But  never  has  my  sight  approved 

A  fairer  than  my  sister  —  no  ! 
None  other  sound  so  much  hath  moved 

As  her  '  dear  brother  '  spoken  low." 


MARRYING    HALF-SISTERS—  GREEK   CUSTOMS. 

It  was   not  reputed  unlawful  in   many   places   for  brothers  to 
marry  their  half-sisters,  and  sometimes  their  relation  by  the  father, 


THE    WIFE    A    SISTER.  365 

sometimes  by  the  mother,  was  within  the  law.  The  Lacedemonian 
lawgiver  allowed  marriages  between  them  that  had  only  the  same 
mother  but  different  fathers. — Philo  Judeus 


But  whatever  might  be  the  practice  of  the  heathen  nations  in 
this  important  matter,  it  was  accounted  an  abomination  among  the 
Jews,  for  the  law  of  God  emphatically  condemned  it,  and  made  the 
penalty  death—"  And  if  a  man  shall  take  his  sister,  his  father's 
daughter,  or  his  mother's  daughter  *  *  it  is  a  wicked 

thing,  and  they  shall  be  cut  off  in  the  sight  of  the  people."  Nor 
was  a  man  allowed  to  marry  his  mother's  sister,  nor  his  father's 
sister,  i.  e.  his  maternal  or  paternal  aunt  ;  nor  to  take  a  wife  and 
her  mother,  under  the  judgment  of  being  "  burnt  to  death,  both  he 
and  they,  that  there  might  be  no  wickedness  among  them."  Thus 
proving  the  wholesome  and  salutary  nature  of  this,  as  well  as  all 
other  of  the  Mosaic  laws,  and  evincing  that  the  Jews  had  "  advan 
tage  every  way,  chiefly  because  that  unto  them  were  committed  the 
oracles  of  God." 

Helpmeet  and  lover,  companion  in  one, 

Friend,  wife  and  sister  together  ; 
How  sweetly  with  thee  through  life'  mazes  to  run, 

Regardless  of  "  wind  or  of  weather." 

I  find  in  thy  presence  a  balm  for  my  fears, 

Thy  smile  is  bright  light  to  my  soul  ; 
Thine  accents  fall  sweet  as  the  song  of  the  spheres 

Chiming  on  to  eternity's  goal. 


& 

ra>v«X*>« 


CONJUGAL  LOVE  THE  LIGHT  OF  HOME. 


^fra^jjONJUGAL  life  without  love  is  a  lamp  without  oil,  a  well 
- '"I  l«''V  without  water,  a  sail  without  wind,  a  fire  without  draft* 
a  tree  without  fruit,  a  tongue  without  speech,  a  sky 
*2  without  sun,  a  body  without  soul,  a  letter  without  super 
scription,  a  guide-post  without  a  way,  a  book  without 
contents,  a  harp  without  strings,  a  bird  without  wings,  a  runner 
without  a  goal,  a  ship  without  a  harbor,  an  altar  without  sacrifice, 
a  priest  without  unction,  a  temple  without  worship,  a  sham,  a  myth, 
a  huge  disappointment,  a  gigantic  fraud,  a  colossal,  and,  I  had 
almost  said,  an  infinite  failure. 

Nothing  helps,  strengthens,  soothes,  solaces  and  cheers  like  love. 
It  is  the  heal-all,  lift-all,  revive-all,  give-all,  reunite-all,  sustain-all, 
glorify-all  of  home — yea,  of  human  nature  everywhere,  and  in  all 
circumstances  and  relations  of  life. 


THE    HIGHEST   SPRINGS   THE    PUREST. 

"Cato,  have  you  quite  forgotten 
How  you  used,  among  the  cotton, 
Still  to  sing  some  pleasant  strain  ?" 

"Laws,  miss,  I  can  sing  again'" 
And  the  clear  voice  clearer  rang 
As  he  swung  his  hoe  and  sang  : 
366 


LOVE   THE   LIGHT   OF    HOME  367 

"Ef  you  want  dc  purest  water, 

Jist  go  up  de  mountain  side, 
Whar  de  ribber  start  his  running 

Down  to  catch  the  great  sea  tide. 
Ef  yo'  want  dc  reddest  roses 

Yo'  will  find  them  noddin'  high, 
Whar  dem  catch  dc  blessed  dew-drops, 

Whar  dem  see  de  morning  sky. 

Would  you  eat  dem  sweetest  peaches, 

Juicy,  red,  or  yellow  bright  ? 
Den  yo'  hab  to  climb  up  fur  dem, 

Whar  dey  grow  right  in  de  light. 
Ef  you  seek  true  friend  or  lober, 

Upward  too  de  road  you  take — 
Hearts  should  neber  trabel  downward, 

Else  dey  mighty  apt  to  break. 

Ef  you  look  fur  fame  or  glory 

You  must  climb  up  with  a  will  ; 
Fur  'tis  jest  de  same  old  story, 

Up,  and  up,  and  upward  still. 
We  am  born  down  in  de  valley, 

But,  if  heart  and  feet  don't  tire, 
We  can  still  be  going  upward, 

Upward,  higher,  higher,  higher. 

Higher  !  higher  !  higher  !  higher  !" 

And  at  every  cotton  hill 
Well  and  swift  he  did  his  hoeing, 

Singing  louder,  clearer  still, 
Till  I  heard  the  echoes  ringing 

In  my  spirit  brave  and  strong, 
Till  I  homeward  turned  me  singing 

Singing  over  Cato's  song. — Harper  s 


368  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

"Higher  up!  where  springs  abound 

Of  joys  that  never  perish  ; 
Where  pleasures  pure  are  ever  found, 
Those  pleasures  only  cherish 

When  faith  grows  weak  and  comforts  die. 

And  cherished  hopes  are  riven 
Then  higher  up  the  clearest  sky 

Is  found  the  nearest  heaven. 

There  doth  the  bow  of  promise  shine 
Forever  growing  brighter, 

To  cheer  the  pilgrim's  path  divine 
And  make  his  burdens  lighter. 

o 

And  when  the  gates  of  death  appear, 
And  Jordan's  waves  roll  o'er  us, 

His  presence  quiets  all  our  fear, 
His  angel  goes  before  us. 

High  !  higher  up  !  a  glorious  light 
Dawns  on  life's  darkened  even, 

And  opes  the  portals  of  delight, 
And  welcomes  us  to  heaven." 


One  word  may  determine  life's  bliss  or  its  wot  ; 
Ye  heavens  now  dictate  tweet  yes  or  stern  no. 


THE  UNEQUAL  YOKE. 


number  of  men  of  genius  unhappy  in  their  wives  is 
very  large.  The  following  are  notorious  examples  : — 
Socrates  and  Xantippc  ;  Sadi,  the  Persian  poet  ;  Dante 
and  Gemini  Donati  ;  Milton,  with  two  of  his  wives  ; 
Marlborough  and  Sarah  Jennings  ;  Gustavus  Adolphus 
and  his  flighty  queen  ;  Byron  and  Miss  Milbanke  ;  Dickens  and 
Miss  Hogarth  ;  Whitefield  and  Mrs.  James  ;  John  Wesley,  &c., 
which  lamentable  facts  in  well-authenticated  history  lead  us  to  con 
clude  that  wedded  bliss  is  surest  on  humble,  common  ground  ;  that 
ambition  is  often  a  foe  to  the  ''tender  passion,"  and  that  the  only 
way  to  insure  connubial  felicity  is  to  be  sure  that  there  is  a  good 
deal  of  love  on  both  sides,  as  well  as  no  small  fitness  for  each  other. 
Men  with  a  special  mission  are  apt  to  have  but  little  time  for  home 
enjoyment  and  for  cultivating  the  affections. 

It  may  not  be  amiss  in  this  connection  to  mention  Socrates' 
composure  in  a  domestic  storm.  One  day,  after  a  long  tempest  of 
feminine  abuse,  which  the  old  philosopher  bore  with  characteristic 
calmness,  his  proverbially-vixenish  spouse  could  endure  his  coolness 
and  indifference  no  longer,  but  brought  matters  to  a  climax  by 
fiercely  dashing  a  bowl  of  water  in  the  sage's  placid  face.  The 
good  man,  as  he  wiped  his  drenched  countenance,  merely  remark 
ing  that  "  so  much  thunder  must  needs  produce  a  shower." 
e±»  869 


37°  PROPOSAL   AND    ESPOUSAL. 

Will  some  one  explain  why  it  is  that  while  some  good  men  find 
matrimony  a  thorn  in  the  flesh,  some  bad  men,  on  the  contrary, 
prove  it  to  be  a  paradise  of  delights.  Many  marriages  are  clearly 
not  made  in  heaven,  but  are  much  more  probably  brought  about 
from  beneath  :  though  God  still  subserves  his  own  gracious  purpose 
in  the  consummation  of  the  same,  and  makes  not  only  the  wrath  of 
man,  but  also  his  false  loves,  to  praise  Him.  God  is  said  to  curse 
the  wicked  man's  blessings,  so  on  the  other  hand,  he  sometimes 
blesses  a  good  man's  curses.  Ahab  seems  to  live  very  comfortably 
with  Jezebel,  \vhilc  Job's  breath  is  strange  to  his  wife,  and  he  likens 
her  to  one  of  the  foolish  women. 

And  Joash,  king  of  Israel,  sent  to  Amaziah  king  of  Judah,  say- 
jiig,  The  thistle  that  was  in  Lebanon  sent  to  the  cedar  that  was  in 
Lebanon,  saying,  Give  thy  daughter  to  my  son  to  wife  ;  and  there 
passed  by  a  wild  beast  that  was  in  Lebanon,  and  trode  down  the 
thistle. — Bible. 

Thou  rankling,  noxious,  curse-bred  growth, 

Wilt  woo  the  cedar's  daughter  ; 
Thy  baseness  spurned  by  wild  beast's  mouth, 

Or  doomed  to  culture's  slaughter? 

Thou  spreading  plague,  thou  down-winged  pest, 

All  winds  thy  seeds  are  sowing  ; 
Shall  beauty  wed  thy  piercing  breast, 

With  thousand  mischiefs  blowing  ? 


Foul  type  of  sin  !  for  shame  go  hide, 
Nor  tempt  th'  high-branching  thunder  ; 

But  once  provoke  the  forest's  pride, 
Wild  beasts  shall  tread  thcc  under. 

Be  yc  not  unequally  yoked  together  with  unbelievers  :  for  what 
fellowship  hath  righteousness  with  unrighteousness  ?  and  what 
communion  hath  light  with  darkness? 


THE    UNEQUAL   YOKE.  371 

^  And  what  concord  hath  Christ  with  Belial  ?     or  what  part  hath 
he  that  believeth  with  an  infidel  ? 

And  what  agreement  hath  the  temple  of  God  with  idols  ?  for 
ye  are  the  temple  of  the  living  God  ;  as  God  hath  said,  I  will  dwell 
in  them,  and  walk  in  them  ;  and  I  will  be  their  God,  and  they  shall 
be  my  people. — Bible. 

This  injunction  applies  to  business  as  well  as  to  matrimonial 
contracts  or  engagements,  and  forbids  all  firm  and  binding  com 
pacts  with  sinners  of  either  sex  and  of  every  nation.  Men  are 
here  enjoined  to  avoid  all  entangling  alliances,  in  order  to  prevent 
the  necessity  of  violent  disentanglement*,  or  of  mutual  destruction. 

James,  the  brother  of  Jude,  both  alike  in  their  great  plainness  of 
speech  and  stern  denunciation  of  wrong,  says,  "  Ye  adulterers  and 
adulteresses,  know  ye  not  that  the  friendship  of  the  world  is  enmity 
with  God  :  whosoever,  therefore,  will  be  a  friend  of  the  world  is  an 
enemy  of  God  ?"  Ah  !  many  a  man  has  been  inveigled  into  a  for 
bidden  yoke  by  the  plausible  pretences  of  what  Bunyan  calls 
'  Madam  Bubble  "—this  present  evil  world.  Her  appearance,  /.  e. 
the  brightness  of  earthly  allurements,  being  set  forth  by  the  im 
mortal  dreamer  in  the  following  unique  and  lively  style  : 

Honesty.  Madam  Bubble  !  is  she  not  a  tall,  comely  dame,  some 
what  of  a  swarthy  complexion  ? 

Standfast.  Right,  you  hit  it  ;  she  is  just  such  a  one. 

Hon.  Doth  she  not  speak  very  smoothly,  and  give  you  a  smile 
at  the  end  of  a  sentence  ? 

Stand.  You  fall  right  upon  it  again,  for  Micse  are  her  very 
actions. 

Hon.  Doth  she  not  wear  a  great  purse  by  her  side,  and  is  not 
her  hand  often  in  it,  fingering  her  money,  as  if  that  was  her  heart's 
delight  ? 

Stand.  It  is  just  so  ;  had  she  stood  by  all  this  while  you  could 
not  more  amply  have  set  her  forth  before  me,  nor  have  better  de 
scribed  her  features. 


T2  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

Hon.  Then  he  that  drew  her  picture  was  a  good  lluiner,  and  he 
that  wrote  of  her  said  true. 

Great.  This  woman  is  a  witch,  and  it  is  by  virtue  of  her  sorcer 
ies  that  this  ground  is  enchanted.  Whoever  doth  lay  their  head 
down  in  her  lap,  had  as  good  lay  it  down  on  that  block  over  which 
the  axe  doth  hang  :  and  whoever  lay  their  eyes  upon  her  beauty 
are  accounted  the  enemies  of  God. 


TIIK    INCARNATE   TEMPTER. 

"I  see  a  spirit  by  thy  side, 
Purple-winged  and  caglc-cycd, 
Looking  like  a  heavenly  guide. 

Though  he  seem  so  bright  and  fair, 
Krc  thou  trust  his  proffered  care, 
Pause  a  little  and  beware. 

1  f  he  bid  thec  bow  before 
Crowned  mind  and  nothing  more, 
The  great  idol  men  adore  ; 

And  with  starry  veil  unfold 

Sin,  the  trailing  serpent  old, 

Till  his  scales  shine  out  like  gold. 

Though  his  words  seem  true  and  wise, 
Soul,  I  say  to  thee  —  arise, 
He  is  a  demon  in  disguise." 


THE   UNEQUAL   CONNUBIAL   YOKE  THE   WORST   OF   ALL. 

Ah  !  of  all  the  ill-starred  unions,  or  to  use  a  less  astrological 
phrase,  of  all  the  ill-fated  and  evil-boding  mesalliances  this  sin- 
plagued  world  has  to  painfully  bear,  that  of  saint  and  sinner  bccom- 


THE    UNEQUAL   YOKE.  373 

ing  legally  one  in  God's  holy  name,  and  at  the  sacred  altar  itself, 
and  using  the  great  seal,  bearing  the  grand  device,  "  What  God 
hath  joined  together  let  no  man  put  asunder,"  to  stamp  the  ill- 
consorted  measure  as  with  divine  approval,  is  the  worst  and  most 
baneful  act  of  all  in  its  dire  and  far-reaching  results. 

Even  birds,  beasts,  reptiles  and  insects  reprove  man  in  this 
respect,  and  promptly  rebuke  his  eggregrious  folly.  They  never 
leave  their  own  kind,  but  ever  cleave  to  the  same  species,  the  clean 
with  the  clean,  and  the  unclean  with  the  unclean. 

We,  therefore,  send  the  celibate  proposing  matrimony  to  the 
same  school  as  that  to  which  Solomon  directs  the  slothful  soul, 
saying,  "  Go  to  the  ant,  thou  sluggard,  consider  her  ways  and  be 


wise. 


For  even  the  minute  emmets,  skilful  and  wonderful  as  they  are, 
never  intercommunicate  with  those  of  other  communities,  but  con 
fine  themselves  strictly  to  those  of  their  own  particular  species. 
And  it  is  literally  true  with  regard  to  the  feathered  tribes,  and  in 
this  relation  especially,  that  "  Birds  of  a  feather  flock  together." 
Whoever,  for  instance,  saw  a  jackdaw  (we  mean  among /<?zi//j)  mate 
with  a  swan,  or  a  sparrow  make  love  to  an  eagle,  or  detected  a  dark 
raven  in  the  evening  twilight  croaking  affection  in  the  musical  ear 
of  the  brilliant  oriole.  A  dove  is  not  allowed  in  a  community  of 
crows,  she  would  shame  their  blackness. 

The  glittering  butterflies,  yonder  disporting  in  the  summer  beam, 
brighter  than  the  flowers  from  whose  sweet   cups  they  drink  their 
meed  of  delectation,   never   mingle   but    with   those   of  their  own 
color — the  white  with  white,  and  brown   with   the   brown,  and  the 
yellow  with  those  as  golden  as  themselves.      Ah  !  nature  is  consis 
tent  throughout,  would  that  man  were  likewise. 
Shall  vulture  woo  the  dove,  • 
And  wolf  with  lamb  unite? 
Shall  hate  commune  with  love, 
Or  darkness  sue  for  light  ? 


374  PROPOSAL  AND   ESPOUSAL. 

Shall  good  and  evil  join, 

And  God  with  idols  dwell  ? 
Shall  grace  and  vice  combine, 
And  heaven  league  with  hell  ? 

Yet  this  attempt  to  unite  the  incompatible  and  merge  the  in 
congruous,  and  make  the  two  extremes  of  a  contradiction  come 
together,  is  endeavored  after  every  time  a  child  of  God  and  a  child 
of  the  devil  agree  to  walk  together,  linked  by  the  marriage  ring, 
for  the  journey  of  life. 

Then  take  the  case  of  Samson,    who   "  went   down    to   Timnath, 
and  saw  a  woman  in  Timnath  of  the  daughters  of  the  Philistines. 

And  he  came  up,  and  told  his  father  and  his  mother,  and  said 
I  have  seen  a  woman  in  Timnath  of  the  daughters  ot  the  Philis 
tines  ;  now  therefore  get  her  for  me  to  wife. 

Then  his  father  and  his  mother  said  unto  him,  Is  there  never  a 
woman  among  the  daughters  of  thy  brethren,  or  among  all  my 
people,  that  thou  goest  to  take  a  wife  of  the  uncircumcisecl  Philis 
tines  ?  And  Samson  said  unto  his  father,  Get  her  for  me  :  for  she 
pleaseth  me  well. 

But  his  father  and  his  mother  knew  not  that  it  was  of  the  Lord, 
that  he  sought  an  occasion  against  the  Philistines  :  for  at  that  time 
the  Philistines  had  dominion  over  Israel." 

Here  we  see  the  Almighty  suffering  to  come  to  pass  what  He 
does  not  directly  counsel  or  even  approve  ;  that  He  makes  even 
human  weakness  an  effective  means  of  chastising  his  enemies. 

The  words  used  in  our  marriage  ceremony,  "  What  God  hath 
joined  together  let  no  man  put  asunder,"  has  respect  simply  to  the 
rite  of  matrimony,  and  not  to  the  eligibility  of  the  contracting  par 
ties  availing  themselves  of  it.  Hence  we  use  the  term,  "joined 
together  according  to  God's  holy  ordinance." 

The  use  of  a  good  ordinance  does  not  necessarily  make  the 
persons  good  engaged  in  it,  for  a  man  may  "  use  the  law  unlaw 
fully,"  and  may  put  a  good  seal  to  a  bad  contract, 


THE    UNEQUAL    YOKE.  375 

Fire  and  water  may  meet,  indeed,  but  it.  will  be  a  troubled  con 
tact  ;  they  cannot  dwell  together.  One  must  prevail  against  the 
other.  So  holiness  and  unholincss  cannot  occupy,  complacently 
the  same  habitation.  They  are  mutually  rcpcilant,  and  cannot 
coalesce.  The  Cross,  if  taken  up,  will  and  must  be  an  offence  to 
sin,  and  if  laid  down  it  will  be  an  offence  to  God.  The  unclean 
spirit  cannot  bear  even  Christ's  simple  presence  ;  but,  crying  out. 
they  wildly  flee  before  him. 

We  have  heard  of  converted  young  women  marrying  certain 
ungodly  young  men  "to  save  them,"  as  they  expressed  it.  But, 
ah  !  it  was  a  questionable  course,  a  very  doubtful  expedient. 
was,  alas  !  doing  evil  that  good  might  come — an  act  of  demerit, 
deserving  eternal  damnation.  Let  all  those  who  madly  contem 
plate  such  a  reckless  course  as  this,  first  wisely  stop  and  think— 
pause  on  the  threshold  of  decisive  action — and  consider  ere  they 
proceed  further,  and  confer  not  with  flesh  and  blood — a  carnal  con 
ference  is  ever  fatal  to  godly  endeavor— but  consult  the  sacred 
oracles  rather,  for  truth's  trumpet  on  this,  as  on  all  other  subjects, 
gives  no  uncertain  sound,  but  blows  the  blast  of  a  clear  divine  dis 
approval  ;  and  then  let  them  hear  what  various  uninspired  writers 
say,  and  look  around  them  for  examples,  which  arc  all  too  numer 
ous,  of  the  ill  effects  of  these,  unadvised  alliances.  Let  them,  to 
escape  the  evil,  take  pattern  by  that  model  for  young  women  pre 
sented  in  the  graphic  writings  of  the  Bedford  Tinker,  and  see  how 
gentle  "  Mercy,"  in  the  Pilgrim's  Progress,  mildly,  but  firmly,  resists 
the  bland  addresses  of  the  bustling  "  Mr.  Brisk." 

"  Now  Mercy  was  of  a  fair  countenance,  and  therefore  the  more 
alluring.  Her  mind  also  was  to  be  always  busying  of  herself  in 
doing  ;  for  when  she  had  nothing  to  do  for  herself,  she  would  be 
making  hose  and  garments  for  others,  and  would  bestow  them  upon 
them  that  had  need.  And  Mr.  Brisk,  not  knowing  where  or  how 
she  disposed  of  what  she  made,  seemed  to  be  greatly  taken,  for  that 


37°"  PROPOSAL   AM)    ESPOUSAL. 

he  found  her  never  idle.       I   will   warrant   her  a   good    housewife 
quoth  he  to  himself. 

Mercy  then  revealed  the  business  to  the  maidens  that  were  of 
the  house,  and  inquired  of  them  concerning  him,  for  they  did  know 
him  better  than  she.  So  they  told  her  that  he  was  a  very  busy 
young  man,  and  one  that  pretended  to  religion  ;  but  was,  as  they 
feared  a  stranger  to  the  power  of  that  which  was  good. 

Nay,  then,  said  Mercy,  I  will  look  no  more  on  him  ;  for  I  pur 
pose  never  to  have  a  clog  to  my  soul. 

rrudcncc  then  replied  that  there  needed  no  great  matter  of  dis 
couragement  to  be  given  to  him  for  continuing  so,  as  what  she  had 
begun  to  do  for  the  poor  would  quickly  cool  his  courage, 

So  the  next  time  he  comes  he  finds  her  at  her  old  work  a-making 
of  things  for  the  poor.  Then  said  he,  'What,  always  at  it?'  'Yes,' 
said  she,  (  either  for  myself  or  others.'  '  And  what  canst  thou  earn 
a  day?'  quoth  he.  '  I  do  these  things,'  saith  she,  '  that  I  may  be 
rich  in  good  works,  laying  up  a  good  foundation  against  the  time 
to  come,  that  I  may  lay  hold  on  eternal  life.'  '  Why,  prithee,  what 
dost  thou  with  them  ?'  said  he.  '  Clothe  the  naked,'  said  she. 

With  this  his  countenance  fell.  So  he  forcbore  to  come  at  her 
again.  And  when  he  was  asked  the  reason  why,  he  said  that  Mercy 
was  a  pretty  lass,  but  troubled  with  ill  conditions. 

Most  of  the  Grecian  States,  especially  those  that  made  any 
figure,  required  their  citizens  should  match  with  none  but  citizens. 
For  they  looked  upon  the  freedom  of  their  cities  as  too  great  a 
privilege  to  be  granted  on  easy  terms  to  foreigners  or  their  children. 
Hence  we  find  the  Athenian  laws  sentencing  the  children  of  such 
matches  to  perpetual  slavery.  And  they  had  a  law,  that  if  any 
foreigner  married  a  free  woman  of  Athens,  it  should  be  lawful  for 
any  person  to  call  him  to  account  before  the  magistrate,  where,  if 
he  was  convicted,  he  was  sold  for  a  slave,  and  all  his  goods  were 
confiscated,  and  one-third  given  to  the  accuser.  The  same  penalty 
was  inflicted  upon  such  citizen  as  gave  foreign  women  in  marriage 


THE    UNEQUAL  YOKE.  377 

to  men  of  Athens,  pretending  they  were  their  own  daughters,  save 
that  the  sentence  of  slavery  was  changed  into  ignominy,  whereby 
they  were  deprived  of  their  voice  in  all  pnblic  assemblies,  and  most 
other  privileges  belonging  to  them  as  citizens. 

"But  you,  my  son.  not  without  grief  I  hear, 
Are  joined  in  wedlock  in  a  foreign  land. 
*  -x-  *  # 

This,  this  is  matter  of  most  killing  grief 
To  me,  and  your  good  grandsire  Laius 
When  we  reflect  upon  those  coming  ills 
That  must  undoubtedly  attend  the  match  ; 
For  neither  I,  as  well  becomes  the  care 
Of  happy  mothers,  lighted  up  the  torch, 
And  blest  the  nuptials  by  this  pious  act. 
Nor  was  the  entrance  of  your  bride  proclaimed 
Through  Theban  streets,  but  all  as  unconcerned 
As  when  no  native  does  bring  home  a  bride. 

*  *  *  * 

Your  mother  did  not  at  the  wedding  wait, 
Nor  you  into  your  chamber  introduce  ; 
Nor  with  her  hand  the  bridal  house  adorned, 
Nor  with  her  hair  lace  tied  the  joyful  torch." 
For  as  there  is  nothing  more  tight-fitting  and  close-joining  than 
a  yoke,  so  there  is  nothing  so  galling  and  fretting  as  an  ill-matched 
and  uncongenial  pair  ;  where  instead  of  complacently  and  compli 
antly  drawing  together,   with   one  shoulder,   as   the  bold    Hebrew 
expresses  it,  they  thrust  with  side  and  with  shoulder,  and  churlishly 
repel  each  other  at  all  points  of  contact,  seeking   to   draw   asunder 
while  compelled,  legally,  to  pull  together.       The  gross  impropriety 
of  these  incompatible  alliances  was  recognized  early  in  the  world's 
history,  even  before  the  deluge. 

Tradition  tells  us  that  Mahalaleel,  the  great  grandfather  of  Noah, 
made  his  children  swear  by  the  blood  of  Abel  that  they  would  not 


378  PROPOSAL  AND  ESPOUSAL. 

come  down  from  the  mountains  to  mingle  with   the   accursed  seed 
of  Cain. 

Yea,  it  says  further,  that  when  Adam  himself  was  about  to  re 
turn  to  his  native  dust,  which  occurred  not  long  before  the  flood,  he 
thus  having  ample  opportunity  of  witnessing  the  fearful  results  of 
his  disobedience  in  the  still  prevailing  defection  of  his  ever-increas 
ing  family,  he  called  for  his  son  Seth  and  the  other  branches  of  his 
family,  and  gave  them  a  strict  charge  that  they  should  always  live 
separate,  and  have  no  manner  of  intercourse  with  the  impious  fam 
ily  of  the  murderer  Cain. 

"  Immediately  after  the  death  of  Adam,  say  several  of  these 
writers,  Seth,  being  wearied  with  the  wickedness  of  the  family  of 
Cain,  his  neighbors,  and  fearing  that  now  they  would  become  more 
profligate,  retired  from  the  plain,  where  he  lived"  before,  and  taking 
with  him  his  eldest  Enos,  and  Cainan,  the  son  of  Enos,  and  Mahal- 
aleel  the  son  of  Cainan,  and  their  wives,  brought  them  up  unto  the 
top  of  that  mountain  where  Adam  was  buried  ;  that  these  inhabi 
tants  of  the  mountains  became  very  famous  for  their  holiness,  justice 
and  purity  ;  that  they  continually  employed  themselves  in  the 
praises  of  God,  and  in  cultivating  their  minds  in  sublime  specula 
tions  ;  and  that  when  they  were  removed  to  a  greater  distance  from 
the  earth,  they  were  so  very  near  the  celestial  paradise  that  they 
heard  the  voices  of  angels  celebrating  the  praises  of  God,  and  joined 
with  them  in  their  sacred  hymns  and  heavenly  benedictions. 

It  is  supposed  by  some  that  at  this  early  age  or  infancy  of  the 
world,  the  angels  were  conversant  with  good  men.  And  it  may 
not  be  improperly  said  of  Enoch  and  of  Noah  both,  that  they 
"  walked  with  God  "  in  this  sense,  viz.,  that  they  had  oftentimes 
familiar  convere  with  these  messsengers,  who  might  be  sent  with 
instructions  from  him  how  they  were  to  behave  on  several  occasions 
of  special  interest,  and  thus  proving  themselves  ministers  to  the 
heirs  of  salvation  under  the  first  dispensation.— Stack/iouse" 


THE  UNEQUAL  YOKE.  379 

HOW  AN  EQUAL  YOKE  MAY  BECOME  UNEQUAL. 

The  terrible  process  is,  alas  !  simple  enough,  and  patent  to  our 
every  day  observation,  and  the  readiest  way  to  its  accomplishment 
is  a  too-early  marriage.  For  the  mind,  as  well  as  the  body,  is 
capable  of  growth,  and  of  very  rapid  development,  in  the  young  ; 
and  two  persons  who  are  of  the  same  size  at  fifteen  years  of  age, 
may  be  of  very  unequal  stature  at  twenty-one. 

We  say  proverbially  that  "tastes  differ,"  and  they  differ,  too 
oftentimes,  very  materially  in  the  same  individual  at  different  per 
iods  of  his  ever-changing  earthly  career  ;  and  what  is  vulgarly  called 
"  calf-love,"  may  in  many  cases  be  completely  out-grown  and  that 
which  is  like  may  grow  unlike.  If  we  may  be  permitted  to  draw 
an  illustration  from  the  denizens  of  the  deep,  or  the  "  things  creep 
ing  innumerable  of  the  great  and  wide  sea,"  we  would  suggest  to 
yonder  young  crustacean,  who,  while  still  growing,  annually  casts 
his  too-contracted  shell,  that  he  wait  for  full  development  before  he 
form  a  life  alliance  with  any  marine  companion. 

"  To  marry  a  young  man  is,  in  the  popular  idea  to  insure,  as  far 
as  human  means  will  avail,  his  morality  and  responsibility  in  this 
world  and  the  next.  Hence,  given  an  insured  income  and  a  suit 
able  partner,  an  early  marriage  is  not  only  held  to  be  a  romantic 
and  touching  thing,  but  there  is  an  aroma  of  prudence  and  virtue 
about  it  which  commends  it  to  the  more  sedate  and  orthodox  of 
our  population. 

The  marriage  takes  place,  haloed  by  a  sort  of  roseate  glow  which 
belongs  to  all  things  of  the  early  morning,  or  of  spring,  and  for  a 
year  or  two  the  union  is  really  true  and  beautiful.  The  fancy  or 
passion  or  feeling  which  drew  these  two  young  people  together  was 
sincere,  and  it  burns  with  brilliance,  and  lights  up  their  homes  and 
friends  and  the  earth  around  and  the  heaven  beyond  with  the  tints 
of  the  rose.  Children,  when  they  come,  are  but  brighter  centres  of 
radiance,  or,  rather,  unreal  Ariels  and  Pearls  in  the  unreal  fairyland 


3>°  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

in  which  their  parents  dwell.  But  in  a  short  time  these  married 
children  begin  to  grow  into  adults,  and  in  ninety  cases  in  a  hundred 
they  do  not  grow  alike.  The  man,  out  in  the  wider  air,  strengthen 
ed  by  friction  with  other  men,  becomes  an  active  worker  in  the 
world,  inhales  new  breaths  of  life  from  his  profession,  his  business 
his  study  of  facts  or  men.  The  woman's  immature  body  is  shat 
tered  by  the  too  early  drains  upon  her  strength,  she  has  no  time 
nor  health  for  culture,  for  observation,  for  keeping  up  in  any  way 
with  her  husband.  The  tie  which  exists  between  them  was  formed 
so  early,  is  so  much  a  part  of  themselves,  that  they  cannot  view  it 
or  each  other  with  the  common  sense  or  cool  judgment  which  they 
could  and  would  bring  to  bear  on  any  other  relation  of  life.  Often 
too,  this  tic,  which  grows  out  of  the  flutterings  of  the  heart  pro 
duced  by  a  pretty  face,  a  sweet  voice,  a  walk  by  moonlight,  is  the 
only  bond  between  them. 

The  longer  they  live  together,  the  less  they  understand  each 
other.  Sometimes  the  husband  or  wife  meets  a  woman  or  a  man 
who  does  '  understand,'  and  then  comes  a  long  tragedy,  played  out 
in  the  home,  if  they  have  self-control,  in  silence,  until  death  merci 
fully  drops  the  curtain. 

The  marriages  of  the  middle-aged  are  subjects  of  joke  for  all 
the  world,  especially  for  young  people,  who,  arrogant  in  the  certain 
ty  of  beauty  and  youth  and  enthusiam,  suppose  that  they  hold  the 
title  deeds  to  all  the  joy  and  love  in  the  world.  They  greatly  mis 
take.  The  man  who  has  carried  bravely  to  middle  age  the  conse 
quences  of  his  first  whim  or  passion,  who  has  grown  in  wisdom, 
influence  and  strength,  unhampered  by  a  silly,  vicious  or  stupid  wife, 
throws  into  the  love  of  his  later  life  all  the  force  of  his  matured 
intellect  and  tastes,  all  the  starved,  solitary  hunger  for  true  com 
panionship  of  his  life.  Even  when  no  such  deep  feeling  enters  into 
the  marriage  of  middle-aged  men  and  women,  they  bring  to  it,  if  of 
the  gentle  class,  as  a  rule,  a  sincere  esteem,  habits  of  control  ot 
temper,  thoughts  and  tongue,  and  those  wider,  sweeter,  more  charit- 


THE    UNEQUAL   YOKE.  381 

able  views  which  advancing-  years  almost  inevitably  bring  to  sensi 
ble,  educated  people.  A  woman  in  a  second  marriage  seldom 
feels  as  a  young  girl  does,  that  a  husband  is  bone  of  her  bone,  and 
hence  that  his  defects  are  a  personal  hurt  to  herself.  She  always 
stands,  so  to  speak,  a  little  from  him  and  views  him  with  an  affec 
tionate,  amused  criticism.  She  has  learned  by  this  time  that  they, 
as  Mrs.  Oliphant  calls  men,  are  to  be  made  happy,  humored  and 
led  by  certain  delicate,  wise  handlings,  and  she  usually  knows  the 
art  of  it.  The  husband  in  this  case,  brings  all  the  experience  and 
the  gentleness  with  which  he  has  learned  to  treat  all  women.  In 
short,  if  there  is  less  love  in  the  late  marriages,  there  is  usually  so 
much  more  common  sense  and  habitual  politeness  that  the  chances 
for  happiness  are  equalized. 

Of  course,  the  ideal  marriage  is  that  neither  of  immature  youth 
nor  middle  age.  Thejttste  millieu  is  always  right  in  every  disputed 
question.  But  when  one  is  at  either  end  it  is  so  hard  to  reach  the 
middle ! 

After  all,  we  are  tempted  to  reverse  Punch's  counsel,  and  to  say 
to  all  who  are  tempted  to  marry — do  it.  Go  into  the  field  and  reap 
your  little  harvest  of  experience.  Whatever  the  juice,  bitter  or 
sweet,  which  you  express  from  it,  it  will  be  your  own,  and  will  be  a 
better  tonic  and  medicine  for  your  life  than  that  which  any  other 
man  can  bring  you. — Philadelphia  Press. 

Alas  !  that  the  customs  of  the  people  are  vain  in  this  as  in  many 
other  respects,  and  the  higher  you  go  in  society  the  worse  it  seems 
to  become.  Most  of  the  marriages  among  thrones  are  semi-political 
alliances.  Crowns  bow  to  the  unequal  yoke  at  the  bidding  of  the 
power  behind  the  throne,  and  there  are  probably  fewer  royal 
matches  "  made  in  heaven  "  than  that  of  any  other  kind.  The  fol 
lowing  news,  which  comes  to  us  from  Madrid,  Spain,  is  glaringly 
illustrative  of  this  sad  fact,  showing  that  the  children  of  kings  are 
oftentimes  but  unwitting  puppets  in  the  designing  hands  of  political 
"  wire-pullers  "  : — 


3$2  PROPOSAL   AND    ESPOUSAL. 

"  Among  the  schemes  mooted  to  secure  a  permanency  for  the 
regency  is  the  marriage  of  Queen  Mercedes  and  Infante  Jaime,  son 
of  Don  Carlos.  As  the  Infante  is  only  fifteen  years  of  age  and  the 
Oueen  but  a  few  months  past  five,  the  marriage  looks  decidedly 
quixotic.  It  is  said  the  alliance  would  satisfy  the  ambition  of  Don 
Carlos,  and  has  the  approval  of  the  Pope.  The  Republican  papers, 
however,  denounce  the  scheme,  and  the  public  generally  rather 
laugh  at  the  proposed  marriage  of  two  infants." 

Yea,  and  we  would  laugh  with  them  if  it  were  not  too  grave  a 
subject  for  ridicule. 

That  these  nation -formed  yokes,  put  on  the  necks  of  royai 
couples — who  are  oftentimes  thus  paired,  not  matched — occasion 
al!)-  press  with  galling  force,  at  least  on  one  side,  i;  evident  from 
the-  following  : — 

"  A  Berlin  correspondent  writes  as  follows  of  the  Princess  of 
Meniningcn,  the  Venus  of  the  Hohenzollern  blood.  To  her  the 
graces  have  been  eminently  partial.  The  rosy  cheeks  and  Graxo- 
Roman  profile,  soft  blue  eye,  clear  complexion,  and  teeth  whose 
setting  Hygiea  might  have  given,  make  easily  plausible  the  story 
of  her  heart  intrigues,  but  give  little  clue  to  the  unhappy  marriage 
to  which  she  was  martyred.  The  beautiful  princess,  it  is  said,  tell 
upon  her  knees  before  the  sturdy  grandfather,  and  begged  and  en 
treated  the  recall  of  the  nuptial  cards  ;  but  he  proved  inexorable, 
and  let  the  tears  flow  unchecked.  She  loved  another  who  was  not 
a  prince  of  the  blood  ;  but  the  name  Hohenzollern  ruled  the  inclina 
tions  of  her  heart,  and  manacled  her  to  a  man  who  was  her  peer 
only  in  descent.  Her  beauty,  alliance,  and  position  have  made  her 
in  a  manner  desperate,  and  she  wields  her  manifold  charms 

indiscriminately." 

*X* 

MONOGAMY  THE  ONLY  EQUAL  YOKE. 

A  yoke  is  made  for  two — not  for  more.       Here,  indeed,  if  any 
where,  two  are  company,  three  are  an  impertinence.      So  it  was  p, 


THE    UNEOUAL    YOKE.  383 

the  beginning,  so  should  it  have  been  in  the  continuance,  and  so 
shall  it  be  in  the  ending— male  and  female,  man  and  woman,  Adam 
and  Eve,  bridegroom  and  bride,  husband  and  wife,  father  and 
mother,  and  so  on  ;  not  singular  on  the  one  side  and  plural  on  the 
other,  for  that  were  confusion.  The  two  sexes  mutually  poise  like 
the  scales  of  the  beam,  no  room  for  a  third  balance.  Lamcch,  who 
as  it  seems,  was  the  first  to  exceed  the  divine  order,  had  a  troubled, 
yea,  a  violent  life  to  defend.  For,  as  the  first  death  was  a  murder, 
so  the  first  song  recorded  was  of  Hood,  and  the  lament  issues  loud 
and  deep  from  the  lips  of  the  earliest  polygamist,  as  he  says  : 

"  Adah  and  Zillah,  Hear  my  voice  ;  ye  wives  of  Lamcch,  hearken 
unto  my  speech  ;  for  I  have  slain  a  man  to  my  wounding,  and  a 
young  man  to  my  hurt. 

If  Cain  shall  be  avenged  sevenfold,  truly  Lamcch  seventy  and 
sevenfold." 

"The  act  of  Lamech,  in  taking  to  himself  two  wives,  had  pr^- 
bably  excited  the  jealousy  of  some  young  man,"  says  Gccldcs, 
"  who  under  the  impulse  of  this  passion  had  attacked  and  wounded 
Lamech,  and  whom  Lamech  in  his  own  defence  had  slain.  To  allay 
the  fears  of  his  wives,  therefore,  he  argues,  and  justly,  that  if  Cain, 
who  had  wilfully  and  maliciously  killed  his  brother,  was  neverthe 
less  protected  from  the  blood-avenger  by  the  special  providence  of 
God,  he  might  confidentially  expect  the  same  protection,  since  the 
person  whom  he  had  slain  had  sought  and  endangered  his  life  ;  and 
that  a  still  heavier  punishment  than  that  which  was  threatened  to 
the  avenger  of  Abel's  death,  would  fall  upon  the  man  who  should 
attempt  to  molest  him." 

"  Marriage  was  thought  to  be  a  conjunction  of  one  man  with 
one  woman  :  whence  some  will  have  the  word  gamos  derived,  from 
two  becoming  one.  Only  upon  some  emergent  occasions,  when 
their  men  had  been  destroyed  by  war  or  other  calamities,  toleration 
was  granted  for  marrying  more  wives,  an  instance  whereof  we  have 


384  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

at  Athens  in  Euripides'  time,  who,  as  some  say,  conceived  an  hatred 
against  the  whole  sex,  for  which  he  is  famous  in  story,  by  being 
harrassed  with  two  wives  at  once.  Socrates  is  said  to  have  been 
married  to  Xantippe  and  Myrto  at  the  same  time.—  Potters  Greece. 


UNREQUITED   AFFECTION. 

But  ot  all  the  evils  possible  under  the  previous  burden  of  the 
unequal  yoke,  perhaps  that  of  unrequited  affection  is  the  most  ter 
rible  to  bear.  Who  can  guess  its  galling  weight  ?  Who  can  count 
the  heart-aches,  tear  drops,  untold  agonies,  of  such  a  living-dying 
lot  as  this  ? 

We  can  imagine  the  soul  under  these  circumstances  adopting 
the  complaint  of  the  psalmist,  and  with  tears  upon  her  checks,  ex 
claiming,  "  My  sighing  cometh  before  I  eat,"  and  mourning  in 
heart-breaking  strain  :  — 

"Upon  my  lute  there  is  one  string 

Broken  ;  the  chords  were  drawn  too  fast  : 
My  heart  is  like  that  string  —  it  tried 
Too  much,  and  snapt  in  twain  at  last." 

"  Keen  are  the  pangs 
Of  hapless  love  and  passion  unapprovcd." 

Yet  it  is  surprising  with  what  carelessness,  hccdlessness,  ruth- 
lessness  even,  men  and  women  oftentimes  regard  the  most  beautiful 
and  generous  impulses  of  which  human  nature  is  capable,  and 
spurn  the  heart's  purest  affections  as  grossly  and  churlishly  as  the 
wild  beast  out  of  the  wood  treads  down  the  vines  of  some  unpro 
tected  vineyard,  even  as  the  coquetting  beauty  alluded  to  in  the 
words:  "The  adoration  of  his  heart  had  been  to  her  only  as  the 
perfume  of  a  wild  flower,  which  she  had  carelessly  crushed  with  her 
foot  in  passing."  And  Sir  Walter  Scott  observes  in  this  connection 
that  :  "  A  lover's  hope  resembles  the  bean  in  the  nursery  talc  ;  let 


THE    UNEQUAL   YOKE.  3^5 

it  once  take  root,  and  it  will  -row  so  rapidly,  that,  in  the  course  of 
a  few  hours,  the  giant  Imagination  builds  a  castle  on  the  top,  and 
by-and-by  comes  disappointment  with  the  curtal  axe  and  hews 
down  both  the  plant  and  the  superstructure." 

Still  another  says  in  like  sentiment,  as  he   sets    his  thoughts  to 
melody  : — 

"Down  the  smooth  stream  of  life  the  stripling  darts 
Gay  as  the  morn  ;   bright  glows  the  vernal  sky, 
Hope  swells  his  sails,  and  Passion  steers  his  course. 
So  glides  his  little  bark  along  the  shore, 
Where  virtue  takes  her  stand  ;  but  if  too  far 
He  launches  forth  beyond  discretion's  mark, 
Sudden  the  tempest  scowls,  the  surges  roar, 
Blot  his  fair  day,  and  plunge  him  in  the  deep.' 

While  Powell.,  in  more  impassioned   verse,  breaks   forth  out  of 
the  fulness  of  his  beating,  panting  heart,  and  cries  : 
"Didst  thou  but  know  as  I  do 
The  pangs  and  tortures  of  a  slighted  love 
Thou  wouldst  not  wonder  at  this  sudden  change  ; 
For  when  ill-treated  it  turns  all  to  hate— 
And  the  then  darling  of  our  soul's  revenge." 

Croley  follows   in    kindred    measure,    and    with   equal   felicity 
exclaims  :— 

"  We  paint  love  as  a  child, 
When  he  should  sit  a  giant  on  his  clouds, 
The  great  disturbing  spirit  of  the  world." 

And  Byron,  last,  but  not  least,  utters,  with   the  solemnity  of  a 
dirge  chanted  over  a  ruined  hope  :— 

"  Alas  !  the  love  of  woman  !  it  is  known 
To  be  a  lovely  and  a  fearful  thing." 

To  all  of  which  we  would  add,  by  way  of  a  closing  admonition, 
to  avoid  if  possible,  by  all  means,  the  curse  of  a  blighted  affection, 


386  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

that :  "  The  passions  and  desires,  like  the  two  twists  of  a  rope, 
mutually  mix  one  with  the  other,  and  twine  inextricably  round  the 
heart ;  producing  good  if  moderately  indulged  ;  but  certain  des 
truction  if  suffered  to  become  inordinate.  Passion  is  the  great 
mover  and  spring  of  the  soul  ;  when  men's  passions  are  strongest, 
they  may  have  great  and  noble  effects  ;  but  they  are  then  also  apt 
to  lead  to  the  greatest  evils." 

"The  happiness  of  human  kind 
Consists  in  rectitude  of  mind— 
A  will  subdued  to  reason's  sway, 
And  passions  practiced  to  obey  ; 
An  open  and  a  generous  heart, 
Refined  from  selfishness  and  art  ; 
Patience  which  mocks  at  fortune's  power, 
And  wisdom  neither  sad  nor  sour." 

i.ct  our  friends  of  the  sterner  sex  ever  remember  that,  though 
man  may  possibly  be  stronger  in  his  reasoning  faculties,  women  are 
stronger  in  their  affections,  and  that  while 

"Love  is  of  man's  life  a  thing  apart, 
'Tis  woman's  whole  existence." 

"  Woman's  lot  is  to  be  wooed  and  won,  and  if  unhappy  in  her 
love,  her  heart  is  like  some  fortress  that  has  been  captured,  and 
sacked,  and  abandoned,  and  left  desolate.  How  many  bright  eye.; 
grow  dim — how  many  soft  cheeks  grow  pale — how  many  lovely 
forms  fade  away  into  the  tomb,  and  none  can  tell  the  cause  that 
blighted  their  loveliness  !  As  the  dove  will  clasp  its  wings  to  its 
side,  and  cover  and  conceal  the  arrow  that  is  preying  on  its  vitals, 
so  it  is  the  nature  of  woman  to  hide  from  the  world  the  pangs  of 
wounded  affection.  The  love  of  a  delicate  female  is  always  stiy 
and  silent.  Even  when  fortunate,  she  scarcely  breathes  it  to  herself, 
but  when  otherwise,  she  buries  it  in  the  recesses  of  her  bosom,  and 
there  lets  it  cower  and  brood  among  the  ruins  of  her  peace.  With 


THE    UNEQUAL    YOKE.  337 

her  the  desire  of  her  heart  has  failcd-thc  great  charm  of  her  ex 
istence  is  at  an  end. 

Look  at  this,  we  pray  you,  ye  maidens,  and  bachelors,  and  celi 
bates  of  both  sexes,  and  consider  it  well-  a  yoke  easy  on  one  side 
and  fretting  on  the  other  ;  light  here,  heavy  there  ;  a  will,  so  to 
speak,  tied  to  a  won't  ;  gentleness  bound  to  violence,  and  winning 
smiles  wed-locked  with  haughty  frowns,  with  the  terrible  difference 
as  sharply  defined  as  the  boundary  of  Egyptian  darkness  with  the 
light  of  Goshcn. 

When  loving  meets  loathing,  aversion,  desire, 
Alas  for  the  contact,  'tis  water  with  fire— 
The  one  brightly  glowing,  with  vehemence  burning, 
The  other  rude-quenching,  the  flame  to  smoke  turning. 

Creation's  two  forces — attraction,  repulsion 

Still  roll  the  world  onward,  but,  ah  !  when  revulsion 
So  stern,  dark,  forbidding,  like  fiend  from  perdition, 
Meets  the  angel  of  love,  lo  !  it  blightcth  life's  mission. 


INDIFFERENCE. 

"Against  indifference,"  says  Carlyle,  "  the  very  gods  fight  un 
successful."  The  prefix  "  in  "  having  a  negative  quality  makes  it 
equivalent  to  "  no  difference."  And  what  can  be  done  with  a  per 
son,  husband  or  wife,  as  the  case  may  be,  who  is  wholly  without 
feeling,  sentiment,  passion,  emotion— to  whom  nothing  makes  any 
difference,  good  or  evil,  pain  or  pleasure,  love  or  hate,  smiles  or 
tears,  life  or  death,  all  coming  alike,  and  passing  without  leaving 
any  visible  impression,  the  insensate  soul,  stoic-like,  singing,  or 
rather  droning,  with  Ben  Johnson  : — 

"Neither  too  easy,  nor  too  hard, 
All  extremes  I  would  be  barred." 


388  PROPOSAL    AND    ESPOUSAL. 

Better  any  weather,  sirs,  than  a  dead  calm.  Sailors  dread  that 
the  most  of  all.  Indifference  makes  a  dead  home,  the  affections  a 
charnel  house — and  what  were  a  waveless,  pulseless  sea,  or  a  breeze- 
less,  motionless  air,  to  the  listless  affections  of  an  utterly  emotion 
less  soul,  impassive  as  a  jelly-fish  ? 

"Who  that  would  ask  a  heart  to  dulness  wed, 
The  waveless  calm,  the  slumber  of  the  dead  ? 
No  :  the  wild  bliss  of  nature  need  alloy, 
And  fear  and  sorrow  from  the  fire  of  joy  ! 
And  say,  without  our  hopes,  without  our  fears, 
Without  the  home  that  plighted  love  endears, 
Without  the  smile  from  partial  beauty  won, 
Oh  !   what  were  man  ? — a  world  without  a  sun." 

"How  radiant  are  your  looks,  and  how  reserved, 
Full  of  indifference  !   Coldness  and  aversion 
Sit  at  the  entrance  like  two  baleful  fiends." 

O,  beware  !  ye  wedded  couples,  of  the  beginning  of  reservedness 
shyness,  coolness  and  indifference,  or  you  may  have  to  mourn,  as 
did  another  whose  affection  waned  soon  after  the  honeymoon,  and 
who  sings  over  the  cold  remains  of  a  "  dead  love  "  : — 

"We  are  face  to  face,  and  between  us  here 
Is  the  love  we  thought  could  never  die  ; 
Why  has  it  only  lived  a  year  ? 
Who  has  murdered  it — you  or  I  ? 

No  matter  who — the  deed  was  done 

By  one  or  both,  and  there  it  lies  ; 
The  smile  from  the  lips  forever  gone, 

The  darkness  over  the  beautiful  eyes. 

Our  love  is  dead,  and  our  hope  is  wrecked, 
So  what  docs  it  profit  to  talk  and  rave  ? 

Whether  it  perished  by  my  neglect, 
Or  whether  your  cruelty  dug  its  grave. 


THE    UNEQUAL   YOKE.  389 

Why  should  you  say  I  am  to  blame, 

Or  why  should  I  charge  the  sin  to  you  ? 

Our  work  lies  before  us  all  the  same, 

And  the  guilt  of  it  lies  between  us  two." 


YOUTH    AND     AGE. 

We  have  seen  Age  marry  Youth,  and,  poetically  speaking, 
December  wed  with  May,  with  singular  felicity  and  blessedness. 
May,  under  the  influence  of  December,  became  more  sober  and 
constant  ;  and  December,  beneath  the  charm  of  May,  grew  more 
cheerful  and  beautiful. 

The  young  wife  was  to  the  bridegroom  a  sort  of  protege,  com 
bining  wife,  companion  and  daughter  in  one,  and  the  elder  bride 
groom  was  to  the  bride  a  father,  friend  and  husband  together. 

But  the  case  was  exceptional,  and  the  character  of  the  wedded 
pair  somewhat  phenomenal.  The  fair  spouse  was,  as  we  say,  "older 
than  her  years,"  and  the  bridegroom  was,  on  the  contrary,  younger 
than  he  seemed.  Besides  this,  to  stamp  and  seal  the  marital  bond, 
there  was  a  good  deal  of  common  sense,  combined  with  a  consider 
able  measure  of  divine  grace  to  sanctify  the  seemingly  incompatible 
union,  and  to  make  it  after  all  a  thing  of  beauty,  which  was  a  joy 
till  death  them  did  part. 

Love  made  the  winter  of  declining  age  grow  to  the  summer  of 
pleasant  delight  as  quickly  as  we  have  seen  the  seasons  change  in 
some  dissolving  view,  when,  beneath  the  touch  of  unseen  hand,  the 
white  snow  gradually  merged  into  a  bright  glow,  and  the  sere  leaf 
grew  marvellously  green,  and  the  flying  snowflakes,  borne  on  the 
wings  of  wintry  wind,  turned  sweetly  into  showers  of  shining  blos 
soms  or  flights  of  glittering  insect  wings  ;  and  the  frowning  firma 
ment  gradually  softened  into  the  serene  azure  of  a  smiling  summer 
heaven.  Such  are  the  marvellous  effects  of  mighty,  might  we  not 
say  magnificent,  love. 


390  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

But  such  alliances  arc  rare,  and  the  chances  of  happiness,  under 
these  circumstances,  light  indeed.  The  poet,  in  assuming  that  old 
age  is  generally  morose  and  forbidding,  sings  :— 

"Crabbed  age  and  youth 
Cannot  live  together  ; 
Youth  is  full  of  plcasance, 

Age  is  full  of  care  ; 
Youth  like  summer  weather, 
Age  like  winter  bare." 

And,  again,  another,  speaking  in  the  first  person,  observes  : — 

"  Life,  with  you, 

Glows  in  the  brain  and  dances  in  the  arteries  ; 
Tis  like  the  wine  some  joyous  guest  hath  quaffed, 
That  glads  the  heart  and  elevates  the  fancy  ; 
Mine  is  the  poor  residuum  of  the  cup, 
Vapid,  and  dull,  and  tasteless,  only  soiling, 
With  its  base  dregs,  the  vessel  that  contains  it." 


Till:    VICTIM    I5RIDE    AND    THE    MISER. 

*  *  *  #  :;: 

<ff  saw  them   through   the   church-yard   pass,  and   such    a   nuptial 

train, 

I  would  not  for  the  wealth  of  worlds  should  greet  my  sight  again. 
The  bridesmaids,  each  as  beautiful  as  Eve  in  Eden's  bowers, 
Shed  bitter   tears   upon   the   path   they   should   have   strewn  with 

flowers  ; 

Who  had  not  thought  that  white-robed  band  the  funeral  array 
Of  one  an  early  doom  had  called  from  life's  gay  scene  away  ? 

The  priest  beheld  the  bridal  pair  before  the  altar  stand, 

And  sighed  as  he  drew  forth  his  book,  with  slow,   reluctant  hand  ; 


THE    UNEOUAL    YOKE.  39 J 

He  saw  the  bride's  flower- wreathed  hair,  he  marked  her  streaming 

eyes, 

And  deemed  it  less  a  Christian  rite  than  pagan  sacrifice  ; 
And  when  he  called  on  Abraham's  God,  to  bless  the  wedded   pair, 
It  seemed  a  very  mockery  to  breathe  so  vain  a  prayer. 

I  saw  the  palsied  bridegroom,  too,  in   youth's  gay   ensign   dressed, 

A  shroud  were  fitter  garment  far  for  him  than  bridal  vest  ; 

I  marked  him  when  the  ring  was  claimed,  'twas  hard    tr   loose  his 

hold. 

He  held  it  with  a  miser's  clutch,  it  was  his  darling  gold  ; 
His  shrivelled  hand  was  wet  with  tears  she  shed,  alas  !  in  vain, 
And  trembled  like  an  autumn  leaf  beneath  the  beating  rain. 

I've  seen  her  since  that  fatal  morn  ;  her  golden  fetters  rest- 
As  e'en  the  weight  of  incubus — upon  her  aching  breast  ; 
And  when  the  victor,  Death,  shall  come,  to  deal  the  welcome  blow, 
He  will  not  find  one  rose  to  swell  the  wreath  that  decks   his   brow, 
For,    oh!    her   cheek   is  blanched   with   grief   that   time    may   not 

assuage  ; 
Thus  early  beauty  sheds  her  bloom  on  the  wintry  breast  of  age." 


BEAUTY     AND     THE      BEAST. 

These  lines  were  written  on  seeing  a   butterfly  feasting  on  the 
body  of  a  dead  beast  beside  the  railway  track  :— 

Thou  gorgeous,  glittering  thing, 

Is  this  thy  highest  taste, 
With  stooping,  starry  wing, 

To  light  on  rotting  beast  ? 

Didst  leave  the  summer  Dowers, 

With  dewy  fragrance  fresh, 
To  waste  thy  golden  hours 

On  decomposing  flesh  ? 


PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

Beneath  thy  transformed  guise 
An  instinct  base  I  find  ; 

Fate  winged  thce  for  the  skies 
But  left  the  worm  behind. 

So  sin  and  grace  in  me, 

Opposing  "  Adams,"  dwell  ; 

One  binds  me,  Lord,  to  Thce, 
The  other  leagues  with  hell. 

Do  Thou  the  victory  give, 
Bid  faith  subdue  my  sense  ; 

Help  me  in  Thce  to  live, 
My  life  and  recompense. 


SUNDRY    EVIL   ALLIANCES. 

The  complicated  evils,  troubles  and  judgments  that  have  grown 
out  of  and  followed  man's  transgression  in  forming  unequal  and 
iniquitous  alliances,  whether  social,  commercial,  political,  or  matri 
monial,  arc  innumerable. 

This  it  is  that  brings  profanity  into  Abraham's  family,  when 
Sarah,  his  wife,  beholds  Ishmael,  the  son  of  Hagar,  the  Egyptian, 
mocking,  which  occurs  on  the  occasion  of  the  feast  made  in  honor 
of  Isaac's  weaning  (Genesis  xxi.  9).  This,  too,  makes  the  trouble 
in  Isaac's  family,  when  Esau  being  forty  years  old—  quite  old  enough 
to  know  what  he  was  doing—  takes  to  "  wife  Judith,  the  daughter  of 
Beer,  the  Hittite,  and  Bashemath,  the  daughter  of  Elon,  the  Hittite, 
which  were  a  grief  of  mind  unto  Isaac  and  Rebekah."' 

It  was  the  mixed  multitude—  the  Egyptians  among   the   Israel- 

—  that  "fell  a  lusting  in    the  wilderness,"  and   inaugurated  the 

idolatrous  festival,  and  "grand  ball  "  of  the  golden  calf—  new  gods 

newly  come   up—  and    that   brought   the  great   plagues  upon  the 

Israelitish  camp. 


THE    UNEQUAL   YORK.  393 

This  was  the  stumbling  block,  over  which  men  broke  their  moral 
necks,  which  Baalam,  when  he  couldn't  curse  Israel,  taught  Balak 
to  set  before  the  children  of  Israel  when  "  they  called  the  people 
unto  the  sacrifices  er  their  gods,  and  the  people  did  eat  and  bowed 
down  to  their  gods." 

It  was  this,  at  least  by  repute,  that  gave  occasion  for  the  differ 
ence  between  Moses  and  his  brother  Aaron  and  his  sister  Miriam. 
The  history  indeed  tells  us  that,  "  They  spake  against  Moses,  be 
cause  of  the  Ethopian,  or  rather  Arabian  woman,  whom  he  had 
married.  The  generality  of  interpreters  suppose  this  woman  to  be 
Zipporah,  the  daughter  of  Jcthro,  whom  he  married  in  Midian;  for 
those  who  imagine  her  to  have  been  another  can  hardly  get  over 
this  difficulty  :  Why  Moses  should  set  so  bad  an  example  as  to 
marry  at  two  several  times  a  foreigner,  rather  than  one  of  the 
daughters  of  his  people.  The  first  time,  indeed,  that  he  did  so  was 
when  he  lived  in  a  state  of  exile,  but  was  nevertheless  kindly  re 
ceived  in  a  family  of  the  best  distinction  ol  the  place,  which  might 
be  inducement  enough  for  matching  himself  with  one  of  the  daugh 
ters,  since  no  express  precept  against  matches  of  this  kind  was  then 
in  force. 

But  now  that  he  was  set  at  the  head  of  a  people  who  were  to 
be  separated  from  the  rest  of  mankind,  and  was  conducting  them 
to  a  country  with  whose  inhabitants  they  were  to  have  no  matri 
monial  intercourse,  for  fear  of  introducing  idolatry,  it  would  have 
been  highly  indecent  and  unpopular,  an  affront  to  his  own  country 
women,  as  well  as  a  dangerous  inlet  to  impiety,  for  him  to  have 
married  into  an  idolatrous  nation  ;  nor  would  his  brother  and  sister 
have  been  the  only  persons  to  clamour  against  him,  but  the  whole 
congregation  would  have  risen  up  in  arms  upon  so  notorious  a  pro 
vocation.  Since,  therefore,  we  hear  of  no  such  commotion,  we  may 
reasonably  conclude  that  this  Cushite,  or  Arabian  woman,  was  the 
same  Zipporah  whom  he  had  married  some  forty  years  before.  But 


394  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

then  why  should  they  quarrel  with  him   upon   her  account   at  this 
time,  and  no  sooner,  is  the  difficulty." 

Here  the  Talmud  comes  to  our  help,  and  probably  approaches 
somewhere  near  the  truth  when,  with  regard  to  Moses'  sojourn 
among  the  Ethiopians,  it  says  :— 

"  The  Ethiopians  placed  Moses  upon  their  throne,  and  set  the 
crown  of  state  upon  his  head,  and  they  gave  him  the  widow  of 
Kikanus  for  a  wife.  Moses  remembered,  however,  the  teachings  of 
his  fathers — how  Abraham  made  his  servant  swear  that  he  would 
not  bring  a  daughter  of  the  Canaanitcs  to  be  the  wife  of  Isaac,  and 
how  Isaac  had  said  to  his  son  Jacob,  '  Thou  shalt  not  take  a  wife 
from  the  daughters  of  the  Canaanitcs,  neither  shalt  thou  intermarry 
with  the  descendants  of  Ham  ;"  therefore  the  widow  of  Kikanus 
was  a  wife  to  Moses  in  name  only. 

When  Moses  was  made  king  of  Ethiopia  the  Assyrians  again 
rebelled,  but  Moses  subdued  them  and  placed  them  under  yearly 
tribute  to  the  Ethiopian  dynasty. 


And  the  people  of  Ethiopia  made  him  many  rich  presents,  and 
dismissed  him  with  great  honors. 

Moses  being  still  fearful  of  returning  to  Egypt,  travelled  toward 
Midian,  and  sat  there  to  rest  by  a  well  of  water.  And  it  came  to 
pass  that  the  seven  daughters  of  Re'uel  (or  Jethro)  came  to  this 
well  to  water  their  flocks.  The  shepherds  of  Midian  drove  them 
away,  designing  to  keep  them  waiting  until  their  own  flocks  had 
been  watered,  but  Moses  interfered  in  their  behalf,  and  they  returned 
home  early  to  tell  their  father  what  had  occurred.  Re'uel  then 
sent  for  Moses,  and  the  latter  related  to  him  all  that  had  happened 
him  since  his  flight  from  Egypt.  And  Moses  lived  with  Re'uel, 
and  he  looked  with  favor  upon  Zipporah,  the  daughter  of  his  host, 
and  married  her." 


THE    UNEQUAL    YOKE.  395 

What  but  this  prolific  evil,  containing  as  many  woes  as  Pan 
dora's  box,  and  without  hope  at  the  bottom,  led  to  the  destruction 
of  Jchosaphat's  fine  fleet,  sent  to  Ophir  for  gold,  and  scattered  to 
pieces  at  Ezion-gabcr?  And  this  after  the  prophet's  stinging  re 
proof,  administered  interrogatively,  "  Shouldst  thou  help  the  ungodly 
and  love  them  that  hate  the  Lord  ?" 

Every  driving  anchor,  every  rent  sail,  every  broken  mast  and 
creaking  timber,  every  drowning  seaman,  every  piece  of  wreck  cast 
up  by  the  deep,  was  an  awful,  crying  comment  on  the  text,  "  He  ye 
not  unequally  yoked  with  unbelievers."  And  that  the  good — and 
too  good-natured  toward  the  wicked — but  mistaken  king  might 
know  the  cause  or  direct  reason  of  the  disaster,  and  might  not 
ascribe  it  to  some  mere  chance,  it  was  said  by  the  inspired  seer  : 
"  Because  thou  hast  joined  affinity  with  Ahab,  the  Lord  hath  broken 
thy  works." 

Fortunately  for  the  peace  and  prosperity  of  his  subsequent  reign 
this  loss  and  reproof  were  not  lost  upon  him,  and  he  afterwards 
avoided  such  ill-boding  affinites,  so  that  when  Ahaziah,  the  son  ot 
Ahab,  said  unto  him,  "  Let  my  servants  go  \vith  thy  servants  in  the 
ships,"  he  would  not.  Wise  man  at  last. 

What  more  shall  we  say  on  this  important  subject,  fraught  with 
such  tremendous  consequences  to  mankind?  Even  the  Lcvitical 
law  forbids  the  unequal  yoke,  as  it  regards  the  lower  creation  ;  for, 
saith  the  law  of  Moses,  •'  Thou  shalt  not  plough  with  an  ox  and  an 
ass  in  the  same  furrow:  thou  shalt  not  sow  thy  fields  with  divers 
kinds  of  seeds  :  thou  shalt  not  make  to  thyself  garments  of  woollen 
and  linen  together." 

Let  not  the  reader  forget  that  one  companionship  leads  to 
another,  and  one  yoke  may  be  succeeded  by  a  good  many  "  binders.1 
If  th«  Philistines  find  Samson  asleep,  they  will  bind  him  with 
more  than  one  cord,  and  all  of  the  stoutest  kind. 

If  "  Mr.  By-ends,"  with  other  "ends"  to  serve  than  the  glory  of 
God,  marry  "  Lady  Feigning's  daughter,"  he  will  have  to  associate 


39<5  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

himself  with  Madam  By-ends  relatives  also,  and  his  friendships 
will  be  chiefly  on  his  wife's  side,  and  these  are  best  described  by 
the  master  allegorist,  Bunyan  himself,  where,  in  the  form  of  a  dia 
logue,  he  makes  Christian  and  By-ends  talk  together  :— 

Christian.  This  town  of  Fair-speech  I  have  heard  of,   and  as   I 
remember,  they  say  it  is  a  wealthy  place. 

By-ends.  Yes,  I  will  assure  you  it  is;  and  I  have  very  many  rich 
kindred  there. 

Chr:  Pray  you,  who  are  your  kindred  there,  if  a  stranger  may 
be  so  bold  ? 

By-ends.  Almost  the  whole  tc.wn  ;  and  in  particular,  my  Lord 
Turn-about,  my  Lord  Time-server,  my  Lord  Fair-speech  (from 
whose  ancestors  that  town  first  took  its  name);  also  Mr.  Smoothman 
Mr.  Facing-both-ways  ;  and  the  parson  of  our  parish,  Mr.  Two- 
tongues,  was  my  mother's  own  brother  by  my  father's  side  ;  and  to 
tell  you  the  truth,  I  am  become  a  gentleman  of  good  quality  ;  yet 
my  great-grandfather  was  but  a  waterman,  looking  one  way  and 
rowing  another,  and  I  got  most  of  my  estate  by  the  same 
occupation. 

Chr.   Arc  you  a  married  man  ? 

By-ends.  Yes,  and  my  wife  is  a  very  virtuous  woman,  the  daugh 
ter  of  a  virtuous  woman  ;  she  was  my  Lady  Fcigning's  daughter, 
therefore  she  came  of  a  very  honourable  family,  and  is  arrived  to 
such  a  pitch  of  good  breeding  that  she  knows  how  to  carry  it  to  all, 
even  to  prince  and  peasant.  It  is  true,  we  somewhat  differ  in  re 
ligion  from  those  of  the  stricter  sort— yet  but  in  two  small  points, 
First,  we  never  strive  against  wind  and  tide.  Secondly,  we  arc 
always  most  zealous  when  religion  goes  in  his  silver  slippers  ;  we 
love  much  to  walk  with  him  in  the  street  if  the  sun  shines  and  the 
people  applaud  him." 

In  former  times,  far  more  than  to-day,  the  Christian  pulpit 
thundered  against  the  iniquity  of  the  unequal  yoke,  and  especially 


THE    UNEQUAL   YOKE.  397 

when  it  was  contemplated  in  the  "  high  places  of  the  earth."  Thus 
on  one  occasion,  when  that  intrepid  reformer,  John  Knox,  took  the 
liberty  of  lecturing  Queen  Mary  from  the  pulpit  Her  Majesty  in 
dignantly  exclaimed,  "  What  have  ye  to  do  with  my  marriage  ? 
or  what  are  you  in  this  commonwealth?"  "  A  subject  born  within 
the  same,  madam,"  replied  the  reformer,  piqued  by  the  last  ques 
tion,  and  the  contemptuous  tone  in  which  it  was  proposed.  '  And 
albeit  I  be  neither  earl,  lord,  nor  baron  in  it,  yet  has  God  made  me 
(how  abject  soever  I  be  in  your  eyes)  a  profitable  member  with 
in  the  same.  Yea,  madam,  to  me  it  appertains  no  less  to  fore 
warn  of  such  things  as  may  hurt  it,  if  I  foresee  them,  than  it  doth 
to  any  of  the  nobility  ;  for  both  my  vocation  and  conscience  require 
plainness  of  me.  And  therefore,  madam,  to  yourself  I  say  that 
which  I  speak  in  public  place  ;  whensoever  the  nobility  of  this 
realm  shall  consent,  that  ye  be  subject  to  an  unfaithful  husband, 
they  do  as  much  as  in  them  lieth  to  renounce  Christ,  to  banish  I 
truth  from  them,  to  betray  the  freedom  of  this  realm,  and  perchance 
it  shall  in  the  end  do  small  comfort  to  yourself." 

Surely  enough  has  been  said  on  this  vital,  but   almost  exhaust- 
less,  subject  to  convince  the   most  gainsaying  and   contrary  mind 
that  in  this,  as  in  all  other  matters  of  life,  "  it  is  an  evil  and  a  bittc 
thing  to  sin  against  the  Lord."      Both  law  and  gospel,  reason  and 
revelation,  precept  and  experience,  all  proving  the  salutary  nature 
of  the  divine  prohibition,  -Touch   not,   taste  not,  handle  not 
unclean  thing." 

If  any  of  our  youthful  friends  are  still  hovering  over  pleasing-51 
like  a  silly  bird  over  a  well-baited  snare,   or  fluttering  around 
candle  of  carnal  temptation  like  a  dazed  moth,  intoxicated  with  tl 
dazzling  and  over-powering  brilliance,   let   them  be   startl 
their  perilous  unconcern,  and  broken  from  the  fatal  charm 
clear  notes  of  apostolic  warning,  "  But,  thou,  man  of  God,  fl 
things  and  follow  after  righteousness." 


398  PROPOSAL  AND   ESPOUSAL. 

It  is  said  of  the  dove  that  it  will  not  so  much  as  smell  the 
hawk's  feather  ;  so  let  the  dove  of  your  soul  avoid  the  slightest  con 
tact  with  the  sublcties  of  sin  and  the  wiles  of  the  devil,  "  for  we  are 
not  ignorant  of  Satan's  devices." 

The  young  moth  in  the  fable  asked  her  mother  how  she  should 
escape  the  glare  of  the  lighted  candle,  and  was  told  to  not  so  much 
as  smell  of  the  smoke.  But,  alas  !  what  Byron  says  of  the  maidens 
may  be  applied  to  many  persons  of  both  sexes  : — 

"Maidens,  like  moths,  arc  ever  caught  by  glare, 
And  mammon  wins  his  way  where  seraphs  might  despair." 

Let  the  Christian  reader  be  careful  to  not  even  go  near  nor  look 
on  the  things  that  are  God-forbidden,  but  pray  the  prayer,  "  Turn 
away  mine  eyes  from  beholding  vanity." 

The  world  is  a  whirlpool  :  you  feel  safe  enough,  perhaps,  when 
away  among  the  outer  circles,  which  are  mere  ripples  on  the  deep, 
but  they  all  connect  with  the  inner  vortex  roaring  yonder,  and  ere 
you  arc  aware,  you  will  be  drawn  irresistibly  on  and  down  until 
you  are  swallowed  up  in  destruction  and  perdition. 

O  !  leave  the  gay  round  of  thy  pleasure, 

And  come  follow  Jesus  to-day  ; 
Yea,  find  in  his  joy  chicfest  treasure, 

And  tread  in  the  safe,  narrow  way. 

Forsake  now  the  harp  and  the  viol, 

The  tabret  and  pipe  of  the  vain  ; 
That  joy  is  succeeded  by  trial, 

That  pleasure  is  followed  by  pain. 

The  "  glide  "  is  a  slide  to  perdition, 
The  "  waltz  "  is  a  whirl  toward  doom  ; 

To  join  hand  in  hand  is  death's  mission 
To  hasten  thy  march  to  the  tomb. 


THE    UNEQUAL    YORK.  399 

Tis  nirth  in  its  uttermost  flcctness, 

"  Quick  step  "  to  the  regions  of  dole  ; 
While  heaven  is  lost  with  its  sweetness, 

And  peril  encircles  thy  soul. 

With  soft,  silken  mesh  the  foe  lurkcth 
Amid  gladness  and  music  and  flowers ; 

The  foulest  of  plots  Satan  workcth 
In  fairest  of  spots — Eden's  bowers! 

My  son,  then,  if  sinners  entice, 

Consent  not  to  taste  of  their  cheer  ; 
That  portal  so  temptingly  "  nice  " 

Has  imminent  death  in  the  rear. 

O  !  better  than  crowding  mirth's  hall 

Is  to  tread  Zion's  courts  with  but  few  in  ; 

For  Grace  never  opened  a  ball, 

Nor  Truth  waxed  a  floor  toward  ruin. 

Then  leave  the  gay  round  of  thy  pleasure, 

And  come  follow  Jesus  to-day  ; 
And  find  in  his  joy  chiefest  treasure, 

And  tread  in  the  safe  narrow  way. 


KINGS   GUARDING    AGAINST   THE    UNEQUAL   YORK. 

It  is  said  of  the  church  of  God,  in  olden  prophecy,  that  kings 
shall  be  her  nursing  fathers,  and  queens  her  nursing  mothers,  a 
prediction  which  notably  came  to  pass  in  the  reign  of  the  Emperor 
Constantine,  and  which  is  having  still  more  complete  fulfilment  in 
our  approach  to  the  splendors  of  the  latter  day  glory.  It  is  a  singu 
lar  fact  that  in  any  nation,  that  throne  which  best  supports  the 
"  True  Sanctuary,"  whose  oracle  is  the  Bible,  and  which  stands  like 
the  house  of  Justus  hard  by  the  synagogue,  has  ever  been  the  most 
fortunate  and  prosperous  in  its  political-marital  alliances. 


PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL.  400 

Take  as  a  shining  example  the  present  king  of  Denmark,  of 
whom  it  is  said  : — 

"  The  Danish  king  has  always  had  good  luck  in  getting  his 
children  married.  There  are  six  of  them.  The  eldest,  the  hcir 
apparent  to  the  throne,  is  married  to  a  daughter  of  the  Scandin 
avian  King.  The  second  son;  George,  is  the  King  of  Greece,  and 
his  wife  is  a  neice  of  the  Emperor  of  Russia.  The  third  son,  Wal- 
demar,  was  a  bridegroom  the  other  day.  There  are  also  three 
daughters.  One  of  them,  Dagmar,  is  the  Empress  of  Russia.  An 
other,  Alexandra,  is  Princess  of  Wales,  and  will  be  Queen  of  Eng 
land  some  day  ;  and  the  third,  the  Duchess  of  Cumberland,  ought 
now  to  be  Queen  of  Hanover. 

As  a  father  King  Christian  has  brought  up  his  children  care 
fully,  and  with  much  liberty  of  thought  as  to  rcl'gion.  It  was  easy 
enough  for  the  Princess  Alexandra  to  pass  from  Lutheranism  to 
the  church  of  England  faith  when  she  married  Albert  Edward,  and 
so,  too,  was  it  easy  for  the  Princess  Dagmar  to  enter  the  Greek 
Church  when  she  was  wedded  to  the  Czarowitz.  Prince  George 

o 

stipulated  that  he  might  remain  a  Lutheran  when  he  accepted  the 
Greek  crown,  but  his  six  children  are  all  being  brought  up  under 
the  spiritual  care  of  the  Patriarch  of  Constantinople.  The  Princess 
Marie,  of  Orleans,  :s  a  devout  Roman  Catholic,  and  the  Pope  would 
never  have  permitted  her  to  marry  Prince  Waldemar  had  he  not 
promised  that  their  children,  if  they  have  any,  shall  be  piously 
educated  in  the  faith  of  their  mother." 


THE    UNEQUAL   YOKE   AND   CAIN'S   MARRIAGE. 

It  may  not  be  amiss,  perchance,  while  on  the  subject  of  the 
unequal  yoke,  to  enter  for  a  moment  the  region  of  the  legendary 
and  mythical,  and  seek  to  ascertain  what  mere  conception  can  do, 
or  unaided  reason,  in  unshrouding  certain  mysteries  which,  though 


THE    UNEQUAL   YOKE.  4OI 

not  of  vast  importance,  or  at  all  vital  to  our  interests,  are  still 
worthy  of  consideration,  and  also  gratifying  to  the  curious. 

Though  we  have  no  sympathy  with  men  that  lie  for  God's  glory, 
nor  with  the  abominable,  hagiographical  casuistry  that  "  a  lie  is  the 
nearest  approach  to  truth,"  yet  conjecture,  when  not  assuming  the 
oracular,  may  render  essential  service  by  guessing  at  the  possible, 
and  resolving  the  seemingly  impracticable  into  a  very  reasonable 
probable  or  "  may-have-been  " — helping  the  perplexed  mind  to  a 
plausible  way  out  of  her  difficulties. 

A  dream  can  do  no  harm  when  told  as  a  dream.  Let  it  not 
however,  arrogate  to  itself  the  importance  of  a  divine  affirmation. 
"  What  is  the  chaff  to  the  wheat  ?"  saith  the  Lord. 

Now,  while  the  Scriptures  are  silent  on  the  matter,  yet  Hebrew 
tradition  informs  us  that  the  first  murder  was  brought  about  by  a 
desire  to  be  unequally  yoked  together — and  here  we  may  be  excused 
if,  for  the  sake  of  assisting  those  who  are  weak  in  the  faith,  especi 
ally  on  some  points  of  biblical  history,  we  seek  to  grapple  with  the 
difficult  subject  of  Cain's  matrimonial  relations,  so  long  a  problem 
which  has  puzzled  the  speculative  mind,  perplexed  the  unstable, 
and  furnished  a  butt  for  the  shafts  of  atheistical  ridicule  and  con 
troversial  scorn.  Let  us,  then,  once  more  ask  the  hoary  and  oft- 
repeated,  yet  unanswerable  question,  Where  did  Cain  get  his  wife  ? 

It  is  distincly  said  that  God  at  the  first  made  them  male  and 
female,  which  may  be  true  of  more  generations  than  one :  for  from 
the  very  necessity  of  the  case,  in  this  age  ot  the  world's  infancy, 
men  would  have  to  marry  in  very  near  degrees  of  consanguinity  or 
blood  relationship. 

'•There  is  an  Oriental  tradition  that  Eve,  at  her  two  first  births, 
brought  twins,  a  son  and  a  daughter  ;  Cain  with  his  sister  Azron, 
and  Abel  with  his  sister  A  win  ;  that,  when  they  came  to  years  of 
maturity,  Adam  proposed  to  Eve  that  Cain  should  marry  Abel's 
twin-sister,  and  Abel  Cain's,  because  that  was  some  small  remove 


402  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

from  the  nearest  degree  of  consanguinity,  which,  even  in  those  days 
was  not  esteemed  entirely  lawful  ;  that  Cain  refused  to  agree  to 
this,  insisting  to  have  his  own  sister,  who  was  the  handsomer  of  the 
two :  whereupon  Adam  ordered  them  both  to  make  their  offerings 
before  they  took  their  wives,  and  so  referred  the  dispute  to  the 
determination  of  God  ;  that  while  they  went  up  to  the  mountain 
for  that  purpose,  the  devil  put  it  into  Cain's  head  to  murder  his 
brother,  for  which  wicked  intent  Cain's  sacrifice  was  not  accepted  ; 
and  that  the)'  were  no  sooner  come  down  from  the  mountain  than 
he  fell  upon  Abel  and  killed  him  with  a  stone. — Patrick's  Commen 
tary  and  Universal  History. 

But  there  is  no  need  to  suppose  that  Cain  married  the  twin 
sister  of  Abel,  if  we  consider  how  fast  men  began  to  increase  and 
multiply  on  the  earth,  and  how  it  is  said  that  "the  days  of  Adam 
after  he  had  begotten  Seth  were  eight  hundred  years  :  and  he  begat 
sons  and  daughters." 

"According  to  the  computation  of  most  chronologcrs  it  was  in 
the  hundred  and  twenty-ninth  year  of  Adam's  age  that  Abel  was 
slain  ;  for  the  Scripture  says  expressly  that  Seth,  who  was  given  in 
the  lieu  of  Abel,  was  born  in  the  hundred  and  thirtieth  year,  very 
likely  the  year  after  the  murder  was  committed,  to  be  a  comfort  to 
his  disconsolate  parents.  So  that  Cain  must  be  an  hundred  and 
twenty-nine  years  old  when  he  abdicated  his  own  country  ;  at  which 
time  there  might  be  a  sufficient  quantity  of  mankind  upon  the  face 
of  the  earth,  it  may  be,  of  an  hundred  thousand  souls.  For,  if  the 
children  of  Israel  from  seventy  persons,  in  the  space  of  an  hundred 
and  ten  years,  became  six  hundred  thousand  fighting  men,  though 
great  numbers  of  them  were  dead  during  this  increase,  we  may  very 
well  suppose  that  the  children  of  Adam,  whose  lives  were  so  very 
long,  might  amount  at  least  to  a  hundred  thousand  in  a  hundred 
and  thirty  years,  which  are  almost  five  generations. 

Upon  this  supposition  it  will  be  no  hard  matter  to  find  Cain  a 
wife  in  another  country,  though  it  is  much  more  probable  that  he 


THE    UNEQUAL   YOKE.  403 

was  married  before  his  banishment,  because  we  ma}/  well  think  that 
all  the  world  would  abhor  the  thoughts  of  marriage  with  such  an 
impious  vagabond  and  murderer.  Upon  this  supposition  we  may 
likewise  find  him  men  enough  to  build  and  inhabit  a  city,  especi 
ally  considering  that  the  word  which  we  render  city,  may  denote  no 
more  than  a  certain  number  of  cottages,  with  some  little  hedge  or 
ditch  about  them  ;  and  this  cluster  of  cottages,  as  was  afterwards 
customary,  he  might  call  by  his  son's  name,  rather  than  his  own, 
which  he  was  conscious  was  now  become  odious  everywhere. 

Upon  this  supposition,  lastly,  we  may  account  for  Cain's  fear 
lest  every  one  that  lighted  on  him  would  kill  him  :  for,  by  this  time, 
mankind  was  greatly  multiplied,  and  though  no  mention  is  made  of 
Abel's  marriage,  as  in  so  short  a  compendium  many  things  must 
necessarily  be  omitted,  yet  he  perhaps  might  have  sons,  who  were 
ready  to  pursue  the  fugitive  in  order  to  revenge  their  father's  death, 
or  some  of  his  own  sisters,  enraged  against  him  for  the  loss  of  their 
brother  might  possibly  come  upon  him  unaware,  or  when  they 
found  him  asleep,  and  so  despatch  him." 

If  we  may  be  allowed  to  digress  for  a  moment,  we  may  observe 
that,  without  any  Scriptural  foundation,  there  is  an  Oriental  tradi 
tion  that,  when  Cain  was  confirmed  in  the  design  of  destroying  his 
brother,  and  knew  not  how  to  go  about  it,  the  devil  appeared  to 
him  in  the  shape  of  a  man,  holding  a  bird  in  his  hand  ;  and  that, 
placing  the  bird  upon  a  rock,  he  took  up  a  stone,  and  with  it 
squeezed  its  head  in  pieces.  Cain,  instructed  by  this  example,  re 
solved  to  serve  his  brother  in  the  same  way,  and  therefore,  waiting 
till  Abel  was  asleep,  he  lifted  up  a  large  stone,  and  let  it  fall  upon 
his  head,  and  so  killed  him  ;  whereupon  God  caused  him  to  hear  a 
voice  from  heaven  to  this  purpose,  "  The  rest  of  thy  days  shalt  thou 
pass  in  perpetual  fear." — Calmefs  Dictionary. 

With  the  generous  reader's  indulgence,  before  leaving  the  sub 
ject  of  Cain — his  guilt  and  reputed  undesirable  marriage — we  will 


404  PROPOSAL  AND  ESPOUSAL. 

turn  aside  for  a  moment  to  consider  the  fratricide's  "  mark."  It  is 
said,  "  The  Lord  set  a  mark  upon  Cain,  lest  any  finding  him  should 
kill  him." 

And  here  the  elegant  Stackhousc,  speaking  nearly  two  centuries 
ago,  observes  :  "  Various  are  the  conjectures  of  learned  men  con- 
cerning  the  mark  which  God  set  upon  Cain  to  prevent  his  being 
killed.  Some  think  that  God  stigmatized  him  on  the  forehead 
with  a  letter  of  his  own  name,  or  rather  set  such  a  brand  upon  him 
as  signified  him  to  be  accursed.  Others  fancy  that  God  made  him 
a  peculiar  garment  to  distinguish  him  from  the  rest  of  mankind, 
who  were  clothed  with  skins.  Some  imagine  that  his  head  contin 
ually  shook  ;  others,  thut  his  face  was  blasted  with  lightning  ; 
others,  that  his  body  trembled  all  over  ;  and  others  again,  that  the 
ground  shook  under  him,  and  made  every  one  flee  from  him. 

Whereas  the  plain  sense  of  the  words  is  nothing  more  than  that 
God  gave  Cain  a  sign,  or  wrought  a  miracle  before  his  face,  thereby 
to  convince  him  that,  though  he  was  banished  into  a  strange  land, 
yet  no  one  should  be  permitted  to  hurt  him.  And  to  find  out  the 
land  into  which  he  was  banished  is  not  so  hard  a  matter  as  some 
may  imagine." 

When  the  fugitive  Cain,  from  the  presence  of  God, 
Was  banished,  he  dwelt  in  the  region  of  Nod— 
The  land  of  the  vagabond,  roving  for  life, 
With  none  to  console  him  but  Awin,  his  wife. 

What  the  mark  he  received  no  man  can  divine, 
Whether  cursed  with  a  stigma  or  blessed  with  a  sign  ; 
Where  Scripture  is  silent,  conjecture  is  vain, 
But  one  thing  is  certain — all  knew  it  was  Cain. 

And  further  than  this,  only  angels  may  know  ! 
Did  God  put  red  brand  on  his  impious  brow? 
Revealing  to  all,  with  unquenchable  glare, 
Wherever  he  went,  that  a  murderer  was  there. 


TIIK    UNEQUAL- YOKE.  405 

Or  did  divine  lightnings  flash  full  in  his  face, 
And  scathe  from  his  visage  all  vestige  of  grace, 
Till  vengeance  herself  could  require  no  more 
Than  to  bid  the  wretch  live,  all  his  woes  to  endure  ? 

Did  a  voice  still  attend  him  where'er  he  was  seen, 
Like  the  leper  of  old,  ever  crying  "  Unclean  ?" 
Or  peculiar  garb,  not  of  animal  skin. 
Proclaim  his  approach  and  remind  of  his  sin  ? 

Did  a  vision  of  blood,  like  a  beacon  of  flame, 
Make  his  head  shake  with  terror  and  show  forth  his  shame  ? 
Did  the  ground  quake  beneath,  apprehending  his  tread, 
Till  men  at  his  coming  all  scattered  and  fled  ? 

Woe  !  woe  !  to  the  man  who  is  guilty  of  blood  ! 

The  divine  curse  upon  him  cannot  be  withstood  ; 

But  a  worse  crime  is  your's,  sirs,  who  now  dwell  in  "  Xod," 

Who  trample  beneath  you  the  blood  of  a  God  ! 

And,  joined  to  your  idols,  contemn  his  blest  name, 
Deriding  his  cross  and  despising  the  shame — 
O  !  renounce  your  mad  folly,  repent  of  the  evil, 
Who  yieldeth  to  sin  is  fast-yoked  with  the  devil. 

In  whatever  light,  therefore,  we  view  the  unequal  yoke,  whether 
in  the  social,  intellectual  or  spiritual  sense,  we  find  it  a  thing  equally 
unwise  and  undesirable.  The  ambitious  mouse  marrying  the  young 
and  amiable  lioness,  ends  his  vain  life  by  being  crushed  beneath 
her  frolicking  foot.  The  earthen  pot,  floating  down  the  stream  to 
gether  with  an  iron  one,  finds  a  too  close  neighborhood  fatal  to  its 
interests  :  for  whether  the  waters  dash  the  former  against  the  latter 
or  the  latter  against  the  former,  it  is  equally  disastrous  to  its  wel 
fare — it  cannot  stand  the  stern,  metallic  contact. 

And  so,  likewise,  yonder  dwarf,  forming  an  alliance  for  offence 
and  defence  with  his  doughty  friend  the  giant,  beholds  himself  corv- 


406  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

tinually  forced  into  conflict  with  enemies  for  which  he  is  no  possible 
match  ;  but  being  maimed  and  discomfited  in  ever  encounter,  he  at 
last  withdraws  from  the  unequal  contest  to  mourn,  with  the  loss  of 
an  eye,  arm  and  leg,  the  ill-advised,  one-sided  and  disadvantageous 
league. 

But  even  these  fabulous  partnerships,  unions  and  contracts  were 
not  so  unnatural,  incompatible  and  vain  as  those  which,  alas !  are 
all  too  common,  where  men  seek  to  ally  the  perishable  with  the 
imperishable,  the  seen  with  the  unseen,  the  temporal  with  the  eter 
nal,  the  carnal  with  the  spiritual,  and  the  grosser  human  with  the 
more  glorious  divine  ;  as,  for  instance,  where  men  essay  to  harness 
in  one  chariot  the  steed  of  heaven-born  charity  with  that  sorry  jade 
the-lovc-of-the-w^rkl,  calling  them  conjointly,  "  liberality  ;"  or 
where  they  would  make  peerless  and  immortal  Faith  unite  with 
purblind,  saucy  Reason,  and  draw  together  in  the  same  yoke,  join 
ing  the  perfect  celestial  with  the  terribly  imperfect  terrestrial,  and 
forcing  divine  belief  itself  to  submit  to  a  crude  process  of  fallible 
ratiocination — these  vain  minds  affirming  that  they  will  not  believe 
what  they  cannot -comprehend. 

YVc  commend  such  persons  who  have  become  vain  in  their  im 
aginations  to  carefully  peruse  the  following  verses,  and  to  sooner 
seek  to  couple  a  mole  with  a  seraph,  or  make  yonder  darkling, 
leathern-winged  bat  to  rise  and  soar  sunward  with  a  glorious  angel 
of  light,  than  to  bind  a  peerless  grace  of  the  spirit  to  the  vile  form 
of  a  mere  carnal  conception.  "  For  the  natural  man  receiveth  not 
the  things  of  the  spirit,  neither  can  he  know  them,  for  they  are 
spiritually  discerned."  The  very  faculty  of  such  knowledge  is  lack- 
iug  in  the  unrencwed  man  : — 

Two  travellers  started  on  a  tour, 

With  trust  and  knowledge  laden  ; 
One  was  a  man  with  mighty  brain, 

And  one  a  village  maiden. 


HIE    UNKOUAL    YORK.  jo.7 

They  joined  their  hands  and  vowed  to  be 

Companions  for  a  season  ; 
The  gentle  maiden's  name  was  Faith, 

The  might}-  man's  was  Reason. 

He  sought  all  knowledge  from  the  world, 

And  ever}-  world  anear  it  ; 
All  matter  and  all  mind  were  his, 

But  her's  was  only  spirit. 
If  any  stars  were  missed  from  heaven, 

His  telescope  could  find  them  ; 
But  while  he  only  found  the  stars, 

She  found  the  God  behind  them. 

He  sought  for  truth  above,  below, 

All  hidden  things  revealing  ; 
She  only  sought  it  woman-wise, 

And  found  it  in  her  feeling. 
He  said,  "  This  earth's  a  rolling  ball, 

And  so  doth  science  prove  it :" 
He  but  discovered  that  it  moves. 

She  found  the  springs  that  move  it. 

He  reads  with  geologic  eye 

The  record  of  the  ages  ; 
Unfolding  strata,  he  translates 

Earth's  wonder-written  pages. 
He  digs  around  a  mountain  base, 

And  measures  it  with  plummet  ; 
She  leaps  it  with  a  single  bound, 

And  stands  upon  the  summit. 

lie  brings  to  light  the  hidden  force 

In  Nature's  labyrinths  lurking, 
And  binds  it  to  his  onward  car 

To  do  his  mighty  working. 
He  sends  his  message  'cross  ..nc  earth, 

And  down  where  sea  gems  glisten  ; 


408  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

She  sendeth  hers  to  God  himself, 
Who  bends  his  ear  to  listen. 

All  things  in  beauty,  science,  art, 

In  common  they  inherit  ; 
But  he  has  only  clasped  the  form, 

While  she  has  clasped  the  spirit. 
God's  wall  infinite  now  looms  up 

Before  Faith  and  her  lover  ; 
But  while  he  tries  to  scale  its  heights, 

She  has  gone  safety  over. 

lie  tries,  from  earth,  to  forge  a  key 

To  ope  the  gate  of  heaven  ; 
That  key  is  in  the  maiden's  heart, 

And  back  its  bolts  are  driven. 
They  part.     Without  her  all  is  dark, 

His  knowledge  vain  and  hollow  ; 
For  Faith  has  entered  in  with  God, 

Where  reason  cannot  follow." 

"  Faith's  life  is  a  song.  She  marches  to  battle  with  a  psalm. 
She  suffers  with  a  hymn  upon  her  lips.  She  glorifices  God  in  the 
fires.  She  passes  out  of  the  world  to  the  music  of  the  Te  Deum, 
and  not  to  the  dolorous  notes  of  a  dirge.  She  thrusts  out  the 
wailers  and  lamenters  from  the  chamber  of  her  departed,  and  enters 
the  room,  having  none  with  her  but  the  Lord,  who  is  the  resurrec 
tion  and  the  life.  Does  doubt  compose  sonnets  or  chant  hos- 
sannahs  ? — Lutheran, 


THE    UNHALLOWED    YOKE. 


HOW     THE     HOLY     MAY     BE     MADE     UNHOLY. 


UT  as  there  is  no  holy  thing  but  man's  profaneness  may 
unhallow  it,  so  marriage,  which  is  holy  as  by  God  or- 
d.aincd,  may  be  made  unholy  as  by  man  abused.  The 
ways  are  many  to  unhallow  it — the  non-age  of  the 
parties  ;  the  forcing  of  their  will  (let  parents  pause  and 
ponder  this)  ;  the  non-consent  of  parents  ;  the  matching 
in  degrees  prohibited  ;  or  with  infidels,  things  common  but  un 
christian,  all  these,  and  more  than  these,  dishonor  the  honourable 
ordinance  of  God,  and  pollute  and  defile  this  undefiled  state.  But 
of  itself  it  is  a  chaste,  it  is  a  pure,  it  is  a  holy  institution,  the  author 
holy  that  ordained  it,  the  parties  holy  that  received  it  ;  and  now  not 
to  be  made  among  us  that  be  Christians,  but  by  a  holy  person  and 
in  a  holy  place.  And  therefore  I  conclude  that  matrimony  is  sanc 
timony,  that  marriage  is  honorable,  and  the  bed  undefiled. — Henry 
SmttJi. 

If  any  of  our  readers  have  assumed,  through  the  pressure  of 
violent  temptation,  the  illegal  as  well  as  the  unequal  yoke,  and  now 
wish  to  release  themselves  honorably  from  the  dishonorable  con 
nection,  let  them,  for  their  instruction  and  guidance,  read  the  fol- 

409 


4IO  PROPOSAL    A\D    ESPOUSAL. 

lowing  decision  pronounced  in  a  United  States'  Court  of  Judicature 
in  Utah,  "  the  seat  of  the  beast"  of  Mormonism  :— 

"  Bishop  Clawson,  one  of  the  Mormon  hierarchy,  lately  pleaded 
guilty  to  the  charge  of  polygamy,  and  in  defence  of  his  conduct  in 
the  past  and  of  his  determination  to  continue  such  in  the  future,  he 
urged  that  he  had  acted  in  good  faith  ;  that  for  thirty  years  he  had 
lived  in  his  present  marital  relationship,  and  that  both  his  wives 
and  himself  believed  that  this  relationship  was  honourable  and 
righteous.  His  wives  were  young  when  he  married  them.  They 
are  now  getting  up  in  years,  and  he  did  not  believe  that  in  honor 
and  justice  he  could  desert  them  now.  Sooner  than  that  he  would 
go  to  prison. 

The  judge's  answer  to  all  this  was  simple  and  unanswerable. 
Bishop  Clawson  must  have  known,  he  said,  at  the  time  he  formed 
these  marriage  connections,  that  he  was  acting  contrary  to  the  law 
of  the  United  States.  Deliberately  breaking  the  law  of  the  land, 
which  of  course  involved  his  taking  all  the  consequences  of  his 
action,  he  need  not  therefore  feel  either  surprised  or  aggrieved  if 
these  consequences  should  be  disagreeable  in  a  very  high  degree  ; 
it  was  no  defence  for  the  Bishop  to  say  further  that  he  still  believed 
that  what  he  had  done  was  right.  Many  criminals  in  other  cases 
do  the  very  same  thing,  but  the  law  punishes  them  all  the  same. 

It  might  have  been  added  that  the  Bishop  was  not  forced  to 
abandon  these  wives  of  his,  as  far  as  temporal  support  was  con 
cerned.  The  law  did  not  recognize  them  as  his  wives  at  all,  but  it 
did  not  in  the  slightest  forbid  his  supporting  them  honestly  and 
honourably  as  long  as  they  lived.  All  on  which  the  law  insisted  was 
that  they  should  not  be  recognized  as  his  wives,  and  that  he  should 
no  longer  live  with  them  as  such.  His  sense  of  honour,  however, 
in  the  way  of  continuing  to  them  temporal  support  on  account  of 
the  wrong  he  had  done  them  had  full  scope.  The  law  would  not 
for  a  moment  seek  either  to  d~y  up  or  divert  the  river  of  his 
liberality." 


THE    UNHALLOWED   YOKE.  411 

"  What  is  the  condition  of  Utah  to-day?  One  hundred  and 
thirty  thousand  souls  who  believe  in  a  polygamous  theocracy,  ar 
rayed  against  1 5.000  souls  who  believe  in  a  republic  ;  i  30,000  souls 
who  believe  in  John  Taylor  as  the  head  of  their  government,  15,000 
souls  who  believe  that  the  President  of  the  United  States  is  the 
head  of  their  government  ;  1 30,000  souls  who  believe  that  the  laws 
of  this  country  are  to  be  broken  whenever  they  conflict  with  John 
Taylor's  commands  ;  15,000  souls  who  believe  that  defiance  of  the 
law  is  rebellion  against  the  best  government  on  earth  ;  1 30,000 
souls  who  believe  that  the  United  States  are  to  be  destroyed  to 
avenge  the  death  of  Joseph  and  Hiram  Smith,  and  that  on  the  ruins 
will  be  founded  the  Kingdom  of  the  Saints  ;  15,000  souls  who  look 
upon  this  nation  as  the  hope  of  the  world  and  sec  in  it  perpetuated 
the  gradual  emancipation  and  enlightenment  of  all  humanity  ;  130,- 
OOO  souls  that  accept  polygamy  as  the  revelation  from  a  just  God, 
15,000  souls  who  see  in  this  practice  a  desecration  of  home,  the 
prostitution  of  body  and  soul,  and  the  begetting  of  children  under 
the  malign  influences  of  jealousy,  hatred  and  unsatisfied  longings. 

"  So  far  as  the  Anti-polygamy  law  is  concerned  it  would  be  very 
easy  to  rob  its  opponents  of  argument  by  making  a  United  States 
Marriage  law.  It  is  a  disgrace  that  there  is  no  such  law.  \Ve  call 
ourselves  a  nation,  and  yet  the  foundation  of  all  society — marriage 
— is  left  to  the  sweet  will  of  State  legislation,  whereby  men  and 
women  are  married  in  one  State  and  very  much  the  reverse  in  an 
other.  Congress  inserts  the  fourteenth  amendment  into  the  Con 
stitution,  removing  all  disabilities  of  color  or  race.  Here  it  is,  '  All 
persons  born  or  naturalized  in  the  United  States  and  subject  to  the 
jurisdiction  thereof,  are  citizens  of  the  United  States,  and  individual 
States  are  prohibited  from  making  or  enforcing  any  laws  abridging 
the  privileges  and  immunities  of  citizens  of  the  United  States.' 

"  Now,  how  is  this  carried  out  ?  Frederick  Douglass  marries  a 
white  woman  in  the  District  of  Utah,  and  walks  the  streets  a  law 
abiding  citizen.  Shortly  after  Steven  Brown  is  sent  to  jail  in  Mis- 


412  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

sissippi  and  the  negro  Thornton  is  sentenced  to  four  years  in  the 
State  prison  of  Indiana  for  similar  acts.  This  is  not  a  plea  for  mis 
cegenation  ;  it  is  a  plea  for  the  maintenance  of  the  Constitution. 
Do  you  not  blush  that  such  outrages  can  be  committed  in  this  free 
country  ?  By  all  means  pass  a  national  marriage  law,  and  if  Con 
gress  will  not  revise  the  constitution  in  order  to  embrace  the  States, 
at  all  events  it  can  pass  such  a  law  for  all  Territories,  and  thus  do 
away  with  any  special  anti-polygamy  bill.  And  when  Congress 
has  thus  done  its  duty  Utah  will  go  on  as  before.  What  then  ? 
What  would  any  nation  do  with  traitors?  Deprive  John  Taylor's 
church  of  temporal  power,  and  one-fourth  of  the  Mormons  would . 
heave  a  sigh  of  relief.  Mormons  who  remain  in  the  church  for 
policy's  sake — and  there  are  a  great  many  of  them — would  dare  to 
show  their  colors." 

A  good  many  heathen  chiefs  and  others  in  different  parts  of  the 
world  have  had  the  same  difficulty,  when  not  the  outward  law,  but 
their  individual  convictions,  declared  to  them  that  their  polygamous 
marriages  were  wrong.  The  difficulty  in  such  cases  has  been  success 
fully  surmounted  by  the  polygamous  husband  retaining  the  wife 
whom  he  married  first  as  his  only  one,  and  at  the  same  time  con 
tinuing  to  support  the  others  so  long  as  this  was  necessary. 

We  have  heard  of  a  bigamistic,  heathen  chieftain,  who,  when 
becoming  a  Christian,  and  wishing  to  join  the  church,  was  told  that 
he  must  first  put  away  one  of  his  wives.  He  shortly  afterwards 
renewed  his  application,  saying  that  he  had  but  one  wife.  When 
asked  what  he  had  done  for,  and  with,  the  other,  he  replied  triumph 
antly,  "  Me  ate  her  up." 


:  4  ^^^y  vJTV^/vr  A:  wJ^X?X>>5 


A     WORLD-WIDE     CUSTOM. 


<~f 


%  -V3 

^o^-'VSj, 

ALL  the  modes  of  salutation  the  wide  world  over, 
whether  Christian  or  heathen,  black  or  white,  bond  or 
free,  kissing  is  altogether  the  most  popular  and  custom 
ary.  And  why  ?  Is  it  because  of  the  more  profound 
courtesy  involved  of  bringing  the  faces  together — the 
noblest  part  of  man — or  is  it  because  the  mouth  is  the  fount  of 
utterance  which  so  sweetly  persuades  and  charms  the  attendant 
soul?  Is  it  because  the  lips,  covered  with  the  finest  integument 
of  the  body,  and  so  thin  as  to  be  transparent  even,  and  more  deli 
cate  and  susceptible  than  the  sensitive  finger  tips,  are  made  the 
medium  of  the  sweet  tactual  token  of  admiration  and  regard? 
However  it  may  be,  this  method  of  expressing  our  attachment  and 
good  will  is  preferable  to  most,  or  all,  other  modes,  and  is  certainly 
infinitely  to  be  preferred  to  the  rude  habits  of  some  of  the  barbar 
ous  tribes,  who,  we  are  creditably  informed,  express  their  mutual 
friendships  and  more  demonstrative  loves  by  laying  hold  of  each 
other's  heads,  and  vigorously  rubbing  their  ringed  noses  together. 
"  Of  the  gestures  that  denote  affection  it  is  difficult  to  give  an 

historic  analysis.     Kissing  was  practiced  in  Europe  at   the  earliest 

415 


416  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

time  of  which  we  have  distinct  record  ;  it  is  not  superfluous  by  any 
means  to  state  so  much,  for  there  are  many  peoples  at  this  day 
among  whom  family  relations  are  quite  as  tender  as  elsewhere,  that 
do  not  recognize  it.  Everybody,  schoolboy  at  least,  remembers  the 
old  legend  explaining  the  introduction  of  the  kiss  so  far  as  Romans 
were  concerned.  Though  in  itself  absurd,  it  has  philosophic  inter 
est.  For  the  story  reveals  that  there  was  a  time  not  forgotten  when 
Roman  matrons  did  not  kiss,  and  we  may  be  sure  that  the 
Roman  lovers  did  not.  For  among  the  novelties  denounced  by 
Cato,  the  indifference  of  husbands  toward  their  wives  had  a  con 
spicuous  place.  If  the  young  man  had  been  used  to  kiss  his  sweet 
heart  decorously  in  that  happier  and  purer  age  which  the  Stoic 
recalled  with  despair,  he  would  not  have  forgotten  the  practice  after 
confarteatio.  We  cannot  understand,  nor  easily  believe  that  there 
ever  was  a  date  when  the  mother  did  not  kiss  her  babe  ;  but,  taking 

o 

a  larger  view  of  mankind,  we  see  that  there  are  beings,  human  be 
yond  doubt,  and  very  far  from  the  lowest  rank  in  humanity,  who 
still  ignore  that  special  form  of  displaying  maternal  love.  —  London 
Standard. 


THE    FIRST   HISTORIC   KISS. 

And  Jacob  kissed  Rachel,  and  lifted  up  his  voice  and  wept.— 
Genesis. 

And  well  he  might.  What  man  with  a  heart  in  him  but  would 
have  done  the  same  under  similar  circumstances  ?  As  men  often 
times,  under  the  influence  of  great  excitement,  laugh  and  cry,  as 
we  say,  in  the  same  breath,  so  it  is  no  wonder  that  the  young  and 
generous  patriarch  should  in  this  case  both  kiss  and  cry  together. 
See  him,  the  poor,  Esau-chased,  travel-stained,  relative-seeking, 
and  new-home-requiring  Jacob,  having  completed  a  journey  of 
nearly  five  hundred  miles  from  his  father's  house  to  the  "  land  of 
the  people  of  the  East,"  much  of  his  lonesome  and  somewhat  peri- 


KISSING.  417 

lous  journey  lying  over  barren  country  and  through  long  solitudes. 
After  being  as  we  must  suppose,  at  least  two  weeks  on  the  way, 
omitting  Sabbaths,  and  going  40  miles,  a  statute  day's  journey,  per 
diem,  and  sleeping  oftentimes  out  of  doors  with  nothing  but  the 
stones  of  the  place  for  his  pillows,  the  clouds  for  his  curtains,  the 
moon  and  stars  for  his  night-lamps,  the  rustling  of  the  sycamores 
or  terebinths  for  his  "  Even  song  ;"  and  then  rising  to  pursue  his 
way  with  nothing  but  a  staff  in  his  hand  for  support  and  defence, 
and  a  cruise  of  oil  for  the  lucubration  of  his  way-weary  joints  ;  to 
thus  end  his  journey  and  his  fears  and  his  growing  loneliness  to 
gether,  and  to  find  himself  "  at  home  "  among  his  mother's  chosen 
kindred,  and  face  to  face  with  the  dearest,  sweetest  of  them  all- 
feeling,  for  the  first  time,  probably,  in  his  chaste,  Oriental  life,  love's 
genial  flame  enkindling  in  his  youthful  breast  —  consummating  the 
chief  adventure  of  his  history  in  the  midst  ot  all  that  was  novel, 
pure  and  endearing,  was  it  any  wonder  that  it  should  start  the 
grateful  tear  and  make  him  overflow  with  tender  and  profound 
emotion,  forming  one  of  the  most  pleasing  and  striking  episodes  of 
his  most  eventful  career? 


KISSING   TOO   COMMON. 

In  the  matter  of  kissing  we  should  reform  our  manners  as  a 
nation.  There  is  altogether  too  much  of  it  done  among  us,  and 
unfortunately  it  is  not  the  hand-kissing  of  the  Germans,  or  the 
cheek-and-brovv-kissing  of  the  French  and  Russians.  \Yc  make 
straightway  for  the  lips.  Beyond  a  shadow  of  a  doubt  skin  and 
throat  diseases  are  communicated  by  this  "  bus,  pluribus  and  omni 
bus  "  salutation  business.  But  aside  from  this  it  is  a  vicious  custom. 
Surely  there  ought  to  be  a  modus  in  rebus,  and  people  should  mod 
ify  their  transports,  and  content  themselves  with  the  kiss  of  friend 
ship  on  the  cheek,  the  kiss  of  admiration  on  the  eyes  or  hair,  the 
kiss  of  reverence  on  the  brow,  the  kiss  of  gratitude  on  the  hand,  or 
27* 


41 S  PROPOSAL  AND   ESPOUSAL. 

safest  of  all,  the  suggestion  and  not  the  actuality,  by  raising  one's 
finger  tips  to  one's  mouth.  And  let  us  hope,  too,  that  women  will 
in  the  catalogue  of  their  "  wrongs  "  include  the  reprehensible  habit 
forced  upon  them  by  society  of  kissing  each  one  coming  and  going. 
—N.  Y.  Graphic. 

One  facetious  poetaster  has  sung  with  merry  truth,  which  re 
ceives  daily  illustration  : — 

"Mankind  dislike  to  kiss  so  much, 

Man  scarce  will  kiss  his  brother  ; 
But  women  like  the  sport  so  well 
They  smack  and  kiss  each  other." 

Among  the  many  kinds  of  kisses  known  to  the  world,  the  fol 
lowing  metrical  list  comprises  a  goodly  number: — 

"There's  a  formal  kiss  of  fashion, 
And  a  burning  kiss  of  passion, 

A  father's  kiss, 

A  mother's  kiss, 
.And  a  sister's  kiss  to  move  ; 
There's  a  traitor's  kiss  of  gold, 
Like  a  serpent's  clammy  fold  ; 

A  first  kiss, 

A  stolen  kiss, 
And  the  thrilling  kiss  of  love  ; 

A  meeting  kiss, 

A  maiden  kiss, 
A  kiss  when  fond  hearts  sever  ; 

But  the  saddest  kiss 

On  earth  is  this — 
A  kiss  to  part  forever." 

To  all  of  which  we  may  add  the  kiss  of  compliment  and  ap 
proval  ;  where,  as  saith  Solomon,  "Every  man  shall  kiss  his  lips 
that  giveth  a  right  answer  " — a  truth  which  received  a  very  pleasing 
and  practical  illustration  in  the  time  of  Zorobabcl.  For  after  this 


KISSING. 


419 


manner  writes  Josephus,  the  Jewish  historian,  who  had  a  statue  of 
of  metal  erected  to  his  memory  in  Rome  : — 

"So  the  king  was  pleased  with  what  he  had  said,  and  arose  and 
kissed  him  ;  and  wrote  to  the  toparchs  and  governors,  and  enjoined 
them  to  conduct  Zorobabel  and  those  that  were  going  with  him  to 
build  the  temple.  He  also  sent  letters  to  those  rulers  that  were  in 
Syria  and  Phoenicia  to  cut  down  and  carry  cedar  trees  from  Leb 
anon  to  Jerusalem,  and  to  assist  him  in  building  the  city.  He  also 
wrote  to  them  that  all  the  captives  who  should  go  to  Judea  should 
be  free  ;  and  he  prohibited  his  deputies  and  governors  to  lay  any 
king's  taxes  upon  the  Jews  ;  he  also  permitted  that  they  should 
have  all  the  land  which  they  could  possess  themselves  of  without 
tribute." 

Now,  though  we  are  no  great  believers  in  what  is  commonly 
called  "blue  blood,"  for  the  livid  hue  betokens  anything  but  health, 
yet  we  assume  that  all  of  us  would  be  more  or  less  flattered  by 
receiving  a  royal  kiss,  even  though  securing  it  in  a  very  cool  and 
stately  manner,  somewhat  after  the  following  fashion  : — 

"  The  presentation  of  an  English  lady  to  Her  Majesty,  Queen 
Victoria,  is  thus  described  by  Adam  Badeau  : 

'  The  lady,  handing  her  card  to  a  lord  in  waiting,  passes  up  to 
the  Lord  Chamberlain,  and  stands  till  he  pronounces  her  name. 
Upon  hearing  it,  she  prostrates  herself  in  front  of  the  Queen  so  that 
one  knee  nearly  or  quite  touches  the  floor.  If  it  is  a  presentation, 
her  majesty  extends  her  hand  with  the  back  upward,  and  the  neo 
phyte,  placing  her  own  hand  transversely  under  that  of  the  sover 
eign,  raises  the  royal  extremity  to  her  lips.  When  the  lady  is  of 
the  rank  of  an  earl's  daughter,  the  Queen  bends  slightly  forward  to 
kiss  the  cheek  of  her  subject,  and  the  homage  is  complete  ;  but  there 
have  been  occasions  when  the  novice  was  insufficiently  instructed 
in  advance,  and  kissed  the  monarch  in  return,  very  much  to  the 
disgust  of  majesty  and  the  horror  stricken  amazement  of  the  cour 
tiers.  After  the  obeisance  to  the  Queen,  another  must  be  made  to 


4-°  PROPOSAL   AND    ESPOUSAL. 

every  one  in  the  royal  circle  in  turn,  the  depth  of  courtesy  being- 
graduated  according  to  the  rank  of  the  personage  ;  and  as  the  last 
prostration  is  performed  and  the  subject  rises  to  her  natural  posi 
tion  in  life  again,  two  other  watchful  lords  or  gentlemen,  as  skilful 
as  the  first,  catch  up  her  train  and  throw  it  once  more  over  the 
lady's  arm,  and  she  slowly  stumbles  backward  out  of  the  room, 
having  been  at  court.'" 

But  while  there  may  be  more  of  dignity  in  a  royal  kiss,  there  is 
scarcely  less  of  beauty  in  a  loyal  one. 

Who  has  not  heard  of  the  Atheist  Hume  and  of  the  lit'/. •-  rrjrl 
that  would  not  kiss  his  infidel  lips,  a  reproof  which  he  was  not 
likely  to  forget  ?— 

'  Some  clays  afterwards  Hume  again  visited  the  house  of  his 
friend.  On  being  introduced  into  the  parlour,  he  found  no  one 
there  but  his  favorite  little  girl  ;  he  went  to  her,  and  attempted  to 
take  her  up  in  his  arms  and  kiss  her,  as  he  had  been  used  to  do  ; 
but  the  child  shrunk  with  horror  from  his  touch. 

'  My  dear,'  said  he,  '  what  is  the  matter  ?  do  I  hurt  you  ?' 

'  No,'  she  replied,  '  you  do  not  hurt  me,  but  I  cannot  kiss  you,  I 
cannot  play  with  you.' 

'  Why  not,  my  dear  ?' 

'  Because  you  are  an  infidel.' 

'  An  infidel  ?  what  is  that  ? 

'  One  who  believes  there  is  no  God,  no  heaven,  no  hell,  no 
hereafter.' 

'And  arc  you  not  very  sorry  for  me,  my  dear?'  asked  the 
philosopher. 

'  Yes,  indeed  I  am  sorry/  returned  the  child,  with  solemnity  ; 
'  and  I  pray  to  God  for  you.'  " 

To  all  of  our  marriageable  young  sisters  we  would  say,  "  Go  ye 
and  do  likewise."  Pure  lips  should  never  kiss  blaspheming  lips, 
never.  There  is  such  a  thing  as  kissing,  or  withholding  a  kiss,  for 


KISSING.  421 

God's  sake,  even  as  we  read  of  Samuel,  the  prophet,  that  "  he  took 
a  vial  of  oil  and  poured  it  upon  Saul's  head,  and  kissed  him,  and 
said,  Is  it  not  because  the  Lord  hath  anointed  thcc  to  be  captain 
over  his  inheritance  ?" 

"  Give  me  a  good  kiss,"  is  a  very  frequent  and  innocent  request 
usually  uttered  between  parent  and  child,  and  means  all  that  is 
artless,  loving  and  pure  ;  but  for  really  excellent  kisses,  or  exemp 
lary  osculatory  salutations,  "seasoned  with  grace,"  commend  us  to 
those  of  the  following  nature  : — 

"  The  lady  in  Millais'  famous  picture  would  fain  save  her  lover's 
life  from  the  massacre  of  Bartholomew  by  binding  the  popish  badge 
around  his  arm  ;  he  kisses  her  for  her  love,  but  firmly  removes  the 
badge.  So  when  the  dearest  friends  we  have,  out  of  mistaken  ten 
derness,  would  persuade  us  to  avoid  persecution  by  relinquishing 
principle  and  doing  as  others  do,  we  should  thank  them  for  their 
love,  but  with  unbending  decision  refuse  to  be  numbered  with  the 
world.  Moses  must  have  loved  Pharaoh's  daughter  for  her  kind 
ness,  but  refused  to  be  called  her  son." 

We  sometimes  smile,  and  not  without  reason,  at  some  of  our 
young  city  belles  kissing  and  caressing  their  pet  poodles  in  the 
public  thoroughfare  ;  and  at  excited  politicians,  in  the  exuberance 
of  their  enthusiasm,  bestowing  tokens  of  endearment  and  affection 
upon  the  steeds  that  draw  the  carriages  of  their  favorite  and  res 
pective  candidates,  as  in  the  case  of  the  great  Commoner  Pitt,  of 
whose  ovation  an  eye-witness  thus  expresses  himself:— 

"  The  crowd  clustered  around  his  carriage  at  every  step,  hung 
upon  the  wheels,  hugged  his  footmen,  and  even  kissed  his  horses. 
Such  were  the  circumstances  under  which  he  retired  from  office, 
having  resigned  on  the  5th  of  October,  1761." 

But  this  is  sensible  and  harmless  salutation  compared  with  the 
wealth  of  pure  affection,  the  floods  of  tenderness  and  womanly  de 
votion  lavished  by  many  of  our  trusting,  gentle  maidens  on  smooth- 


422  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL, 

tongued.  sun-faced,  flattering  and  fickle  suitors  of  the  opposite  sex. 
There  is  no  such  waste  of  affection  as  that  which  is  expended  on 
worthless  men. 

But  we,  as  a  celibate,  are  free  to  confess  that  if  one  thing  more 
than  another  serves  to  destroy  our  confidence  in,  or  at  least  moder 
ate  our  estimate  of,  the  joys  of  the  connubial  state,  it  is  in  the 
growing  fewness  of  the  kisses,  mutually  given,  in  more  advanced 
wedded  life.  "The  lips  that  kiss  till  death,"  says  Byron,  "  have 
turned  life's  water  into  wine."  Why  is  it,  we  would  earnestly  ask 
of  our  honeymoon-waning  benedicts  and  their  growingly-indifferent 
spouses,  that  the  tables  are  so  often  turned,  and  the  wine  becomes 
water,  even  if  not  soured  into  vinegar?  In  other  words,  if  kissing 
be  so  good  a  thing,  why  not  continue  the  gratifying  practice.  We 
have  heard  of  but  one  man  who  carefully  "  kept  books  "  on  this 
point,  and  we  are  afraid  his  curious  and  comparative  statistics 
might  apply  in  no  small  measure  to  thousands  who  may  read 
them  :— 

"  A  Frenchman  recently  died  who,  it  is  stated,  on  his  wedding- 
day,  some  twenty  years  ago,  took  the  original — perhaps  it  may  be 
said  rather  imprudent — resolution  to  keep  a  yearly  account  of  the 
number  of  kisses  exchanged  with  his  wife  until  their  union  became 
severed  by  the  death  of  one  or  the  other.  He  was  destined  to  be 
the  first  to  go  ;  but,  when  on  his  sick  bed,  forseeing  that  he  would 
not  recover,  he  begged  a  friend  to  let  the  world  know  the  result  of 
his  twenty-years'  account-keeping.  During  the  first  year  of  wedded 
life  the  kisses  exchanged  reached  the  colossal  figure  of  thirty-six 
thousand  five  hundred,  or  one  hundred  a  day  on  an  average  ;  but 
in  the  following  twelve  months  there  was  a  notable  decrease,  not 
more  than  sixteen  thousand  being  inscribed  on  his  register  ;  while 
the  third  year  shows  a  still  greater  falling  off,  the  average  number 
of  kisses  being  about  ten  a  day.  And  after  the  lapse  of  five  years  a 
further  reduction  is  recorded,  and  the  account-keeper's  task  was 
simplified,  for  only  two  kisses  were  exchanged  during  each  twenty- 


KISSING.  423 

four  hours — 'one  on  rising  and  one  on  retiring  to  rest.'  Later  on, 
during  the  last  ten  years  of  his  married  life,  they  '  kissed  each  other 
only  on  leaving  for  or  returning  from  a  journey.'  and  he  had  very 
little  trouble  in  making  up  his  annual  domestic  statistics." 

It  is  a  significant  fact  that  the  Bible  itself,  when  opened  in  the 
middle,  greets  you  with  a  kiss.  For  there  the  "  Song  of  Songs," 
which  is  Solomon's,  meets  you,  sung  in  the  midst  of  the  years,  and 
set  in  the  centre  of  Scripture  together,  like  a  beryl  in  a  gold  ring  ; 
the  only  inspired  love  song  of  the  ages  beginning  with  charming 
abruptness,  and  striking  the  attendant  ear  as  with  a  burst  of  full 
orchestral  music,  it  sounds,  "  Let  him  kiss  me  with  the  kisses  of  his 
mouth,  for  thy  love  is  better  than  wine." 

Love  wants  favors,  seeks  for  tokens,  desires  expression,  and 
kissing,  as  we  have  already  seen,  is  the  most  general  and  congenial 
way  of  declaring  the  same,  for  it  involves  a  mutual  act.  It  is  a  two- 
sided  salutation,  and  therefore  doubly  agreeable.  The  young  lady 
who  was  explaining  to  her  guardian  aunt  the  meaning  of  a  light 
kissing  rumor,  that  a  "bird  of  the  air  had  carried"  to  her  vigilant 
ears,  was  strictly  logical  and  spoke  better  than  she  thought  when 

she  said  : — 

"What  happened  there  was  simply  this, 

And  let  them  make  the  best  of  it, 
I  gave  him  scarcely  half  a  kiss, 
And  he  gave  me  the  rest  of  it." 

Of  course  it  is  this  "rest  of  it  "  that  makes  the  zest  of  it  in  this 
particular  manner  of  showing  elective  preference  and  esteem. 

The  kiss  on  the  mouth  or  lips  was  held  among  the  Jews  sacred 
to  the  conjugal  state  or  marriage  relation.  Others,  indeed,  less 
closely  allied  by  kinship,  might  kiss  brow,  or  cheek,  or  hand,  or 
neck,  but  only  one  among  them  all,  and  he  the  nearest  and  the 
dearest,  might  adventure  the  delicacy  of  the  salutation  of  the 
lips. 


424  PROPOSAL    AND    ESPOUSAL. 

The  virgin,  the  daughter  of  Zion,  is  here  alone  musing,  and  she 
is  thinking  of  her  coming  Lord,  the  heavenly  bridegroom.  She  has 
been  betrothed  unto  him  in  righteousness,  but  it  has  been  done  as 
it  were  by  proxy — not  an  uncommon  thing  among  distant  thrones, 
when  princes  and  princesses  negotiate  an  alliance — being  accomp 
lished  by  ambassadors,  or  God's  servants  the  prophets.  She  has 
had  letters  and  love-tokens  sealed  with  the  king's  signet,  and  per 
fumed  with  the  odor  of  the  rose  of  Sharon  and  the  lily  of  the  val 
ley,  the  smell  thereof  like  Lebanon,  and  in  the  midst  of  his  mercies 
these  comforts  have  delighted  her  soul. 

She  has  had  dim  outlines  limned  by  inspiration  of  his  princely 
portraiture,  and  she  sees  him  upright  as  the  palm  tree,  his  counten 
ance  fairer  than  the  children  of  men,  lovely  with  love  itself,  and 
charming  with  even  divine  beauty,  and  she  declares  it  faultless, 
exclaiming,  as  though  he  were  present,  "  Thou  art  all  fair,  my  love, 
there  is  no  spot  in  thce." 

But,  oh  !  she  wants  his  presence  ;  she  longs  to  see  his  person, 
the  king  in  his  beauty  ;  and  still  looking  down  the  years,  like  one 
gazing  along  a  vista  of  increasing  loveliness  and  beauty,  she  cries 
in  impassioned  ardor,  "  Let  my  beloved  come  into  his  garden,  and 
eat  his  pleasant  fruits."  "  Make  haste,  my  beloved,  and  be  thou 
like  the  roe  or  the  young  hart  on  the  mountains  of  Bethcr  ;"  and 
then,  listening  at  the  door  of  prophecy  for  the  sound  of  his  foot 
steps,  or  looking,  like  Siscra's  mother,  through  the  lattice,  she  cries, 
"  It  is  the  voice  of  my  beloved  !  Behold  he  cometh  leaping  upon 
the  mountains,  skipping  upon  the  hills."  And  here,  not  venturing 
to  utter  his  dear  and  sacred  name,  she  substitutes  the  pronoun  for 
the  blessed  noun,  and  says,  "  Let  him  kiss  me  with  the  kisses  of  his 
mouth." 

He  is  the  bridegroom,  she  the  bride.  He  is  the  apple  tree 
among  the  trees  of  the  wood,  or  her  beloved  among  the  sons  ;  she 
is  the  lily  among  thorns,  or  his  beloved  among  the  daughters.  His 
is  the  countenance  like  Lebanon,  excellent  as  the  cedars  ;  hers  is 


KISSING. 


425 


the  face  looking  torth  as  the  morning,  clear  as  the  sun,  fair  as  the 
moon,  and  terrible  as  an  army  with  banners.  Well,  then,  may  the 
words  be  uttered  in  pious,  sweet  soliloquy,  "  Let  him  kiss  me  with 
the  kisses  of  his  mouth." 

God's  promises  are  the  soul's  kisses,  when  the  spirit,  the  com 
forter,  applies  them.  There,  indeed,  he  does  speak  comfortably  (to 
the  heart  as  it  is  in  the  original)  to  Jerusalem.  Then  the  letter, 
like  Ezekiel's  wheels,  becomes  instinct  with  the  spirit  of  life.  Thus 
all  moves  and  glows  again. 

"Don't  you  remember,"  says  a  certain  clerical  writer  in  the 
Sunday  at  Home,  in  addressing  himself  chiefly  to  the  very  young, 
and  alluding  to  a  charming  nursery  story,  and  attempting  to  get 
theology  out  of  it,  "  how  the  prince  came  at  last  to  the  sleeping 
beauty,  and  woke  her  with  a  kiss,  and  set  everything  going  again, 
as  the  sun  kisses  the  frozen  winter  into  a  tumult  of  melting  waters 
and  cleansing  streams  ?  But  don't  you  also  remember  what  n  very 
difficult  task  he  found  it  to  be,  what  a  business  it  was  to  get  through 
that  hedge,  how  many  fears  and  fevers  he  had  to  encounter  on 
the  way?  You  remember  that  one  day  a  prince,  who  loves  your 
sleeping  soul,  will  come,  and  will  force  his  way  through  to  case  it. 
Christ  will  wake  you  up  one  day  to  beauty  and  life  again.  But 
when  you  have  been  waked  up,  then  your  pain  and  sorrow  will 
begin.  You  will  grieve  bitterly  to  think  what  you  have  given  him 
to  do  ;  you  would  give  worlds  never  to  have  fallen  into  those  sloth 
ful,  reckless  and  evil  ways,  and  never  to  have  laid  upon  his  love  the 
burden  of  pain  it  cost  him  to  recall  you  to  life  and  health.  He  is 
very  good  ;  he  goes  about  turning  ashes  to  beauty." 

A  sweet  little  incident  is  related  by  a  writer.  She  says  :— "  I 
asked  a  little  boy  last  evening,  '  Have  you  called  your  grandma  to 
tea  ?'  '  Yes.  When  I  went  to  call  her  she  was  asleep,  and  I  didn't 
know  how  to  wake  her.  I  didn't  wish  to  hallo  at  grandma,  nor 
shake  her  ;  so  I  kissed  her  cheek,  and  that  woke  her  very  softly. 


426  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

Then  I  ran  into  the  hall,  and  said,   pretty   loud,   u  ran  dm  a,  tea  is 
ready.     And  she  never  knew  what  woke  her." 

The  Jews  have  a  proverb  that  Moses'  death  on  Horeb  was  so 
painlessly  easy  and  charmingly  pleasant  that  God  kissed  his  soul 
out  of  him.  So  divine  truth,  like  an  angel  from  Paradise,  allures, 
blesses,  touches,  and  kisses,  with  the  embrace  of  holy  love,  the 
soul  of  man  out  of  his  death  of  trespasses  and  sins.  "  Thou 
hast  loved  my  soul  from  the  pit,"  sings  King  Kezekiah — literally, 
"  Thou  hast  loved  me  up  from  the  pit." 


THE    KISS   OF    HOMAGE   AND    ALLEGIANCE. 

Kiss  the  son  lest  he  be  angry,  and  ye  perish  from  the  way  when 
his  wrath  is  kindled  but  a  little. — David. 

"  When  a  man  of  rank  is  angry  with  an  inferior,  the  latter  will 
be  advised  to  go  and  kiss  his  feet  ;  which  he  does  by  touching  his 
feet  with  his  hands,  and  then  kissing  them. 

"  See  that  poor  woman  whose  husband  has  committed  some 
crime,  for  which  he  is  to  be  taken  to  the  magistrates  ;  she  rushes  to 
the  injured  individual,  she  casts  herself  down,  and  begins  to  kiss 
his  feet ;  she  touches  them  with  her  nose,  her  eyes,  her  ears,  and  her 
forehead  :  her  long  hair  is  dishevelled,  and  she  beseeches  the  feet 
of  the  offended  man  to  forgive  her  husband.  '  Ah,  my  lord  !  the 
gods  will  then  forgive  you.  My  husband  will  in  future  be  your 
slave,  my  children  will  love  you,  the  people  will  praise  you  ;  forgive, 
forgive,  my  lord  !' 

"  The  Egyptians,  on  taking  anything  from  the  hand  of  a  super 
ior,  or  that  is  sent  from  him,  kiss  it ;  and  as  the  highest  respect,  put 

it  to  their  foreheads." 

®m 

KISSING    THE   LAW. 

To  open  or  shut  the  roll  or  book  of  the  law,  to  hold  it  and  to 
raise  it,  and  show  it  to  the  people,  are  three  offices  which  are  sold, 


KISSING.  427 

and  bring  in  a  great  deal  of  money.  The  skins  on  which  the  law 
is  written  are  fastened  to  two  rollers,  whose  ends  jut  out  at  the 
sides  beyond  the  skins,  and  are  usually  adorned  with  silver  ;  and  it 
is  by  them  that  they  hold  the  book  when  they  lift  it  up  and  exhibit 
it  to  the  congregation,  because  they  are  forbidden  to  touch  the  book 
itself  with  their  hands.  All  who  are  in  the  synagogue  kiss  it,  and 
they  who  are  not  near  enough  to  reach  it  with  their  mouths,  touch 
the  silken  cover  of  it  and  then  kiss  their  hands,  and  put  the  two 
fingers  with  which  they  touched  it  upon  their  eyes,  which  they 
think  preserves  the  sight. — History  of  the  Bible. 

And  the  devotees  of  Rome,  in  their  audiences  with  the  Pope, 
not  only  kiss  the  golden  crucifix  on  his  richly-embroidered  slipper, 
just  over  his  great  toe,  which  is  called  metaphorically,  "  kissing  the 
Pope's  toe,"  but  they  have  long  ago  kissed  completely  off  the  great 
toe  of  St.  Peter's  image  in  the  cathedral  that  bears  his  name,  so  that 
it  had  to  be  replaced  with  a  more  endurable  one  of  silver. 


KISSING     THRESHOLDS. 

"  In  a  chapel  adjoining  to  that  in  which  a  saint  lies,  in  which 
one  of  the  late  kings  of  that  country  has  a  superb  tomb,  and  is 
supposed  to  lie  interred,  are  seven  sacred  songs,  written  in  large 
letters  of  gold,  on  a  blue  ground,  in  so  many  distinct  panels,  in 
honor  of  Aaly,  Mohammed's  son-in-law,  and  the  great  saint  of  the 
Persians,  as  also  the  ancestor  of  that  female  saint  that  lies  entombed 
there.  Among  other  extravagant  expressions  of  praise  there  is 
this  distich  in  the  fourth  hymn  :  '  The  angelic  messenger  of  the 
truth,  Gabriel,  kisses  every  day  the  threshold  of  thy  gate,  because  it 
is  the  only  way  to  arrive  at  the  throne  of  Mohammed.' 

On  entering  the  first  large  hall  we  were  stopped  by  a  silver 
grating,  where  we  were  obliged  to  take  off  our  shoes  ;  and  here  we 
remarked  the  veneration  of  the  Persians  for  the  threshold  of  a  holy 


PROPOSAL    AND    ESPOUSAL. 

place,  a  feeling  that  they  preserve  in  some  degree  even  for  the 
threshold  of  their  houses.  Before  they  ventured  to  cross  it,  they 
knelt  down  and  kissed  it,  whilst  they  were  very  careful  not  to  touch 
t  with  their  feet  In  writing  to  a  prince,  or  a  great  personage,  it 
is  common  for  them  to  say,  '  Let  me  make  the  dust  of  your  thres 
hold  into  surmeh  (collyrium)  for  my  eyes.'"— Montr's  "Second 
Journey  Through  Persia. 


•    : 


ECONOMY     IN      KISSING. 

A  little  good  advice  for  those  who  throw  away  their  kisses,  and 
.vhosc  juvenile  lips  may  be  said  to  run  wild,  comes  to  us  through 
one  of  our  Toronto  dailies,  where  a  married  woman  thus  counsels 
her  own  fair  sex  : — 

Save  your  kisses  for  your  husband  ; 

Ever}-  one  you  throw  away 
I*  or  some  foolish  passing  fancy 

You'll  be  sorry  for  some  day. 
There's  no  dower  a  bride  can  bring 
That  will  be  more  prized  than  this, 
That  you  give  your  first  love-kiss. 

When  the  true  prince  comes  you'll  know  him. 

And  he  will  not  love  you  less 
That  he  has  to  win  your  kisses 

By  his  worth  and  faithfulness. 
When,  with  his  betrothal  ring, 
He  shall  claim  your  kiss,  be  sure 
That  your  lips  are  sweet  and  pure. 

So  my  own  dear  mother  told  me 

Long  ago,  when  I  was  young  ; 
And  I  know  the  sweetest  music 

Ever  heard  from  mortal  tongue 


KISSING.  429 

Were  my  husband's  words  :  '  You  bring 

More  than  dower  of  gold-pretence 

When  you  give  your  innocence."  —  Abbe  Kinnc. 


HOW   THE    BRIDE    PAID    THE    MARRIAGE    FEE. 

A  trial  before  a  Groton  justice,  in  which  a  young  woman  was 
plaintiff  and  her  lover  defendant,  was  adjourned  one  day  last  week 
to  allow  the  parties  to  effect  a  life-long  settlement  out  of  court. 
When  late  in  the  evening  the  matter  was  so  far  settled  that  only  a 
minister  or  justice  of  the  peace  could  complete  it,  the  couple  sought 
Justice  Simeon  A.  Chapman,  and  invoked  his  aid  to  make  them 
one.  The  justice  tied  the  knot  firmly,  and  naturally  expected  a 
good  sized  fee,  which  the  bride  paid  with  her  lips.  The  justice  was 
too  gallant  to  express  any  dissatisfaction  with  their  tender,  but 
ordered  a  worsted  motto  "  Terms  Cash  "  to  be  placed  conspicuously 
near  the  front  door.  —  Hartford  Times. 

-  W&  - 
POLITICAL    KISSES. 

And  it  was  so,  that  when  any  man  came  nigh  to  him  to  do  him 
obeisance,  he  put  forth  his  hand,  and  took  him,  and  kissed  him. 

And  on  this  manner  did  Absalom  to  all  Israel  that  came  to  the 
king  for  judgment.  So  Absalom  stole  the  hearts  of  the  men  of 
Israel.  —  Bible. 

In  olden  times,  it  is  said,  that  men  won  their  way  to  public  pre 
ference  and  parliamentary  distinction  by  a  liberal  use  not  only  of 
their  tongues,  but  also  of  their  lips,  Absalom-like  kissing  their 
way  to  seats  of  power  —  osculation  proving  in  many  cases  the  high 
way  to  universal  approbation  ;  for,  as  saith  one  of  our  funny 

papers  :  — 

"In  other  days  the  candidate, 
As  old  election  tales  relate, 


430  PROPOSAL   AND    ESPOUSAL. 

Of  our  staid  English  nation, 
Kissed  all  the  women  :  babies,  too, 
Got  many  a  kiss,  as  was  their  due  ; 

Folks  won  by  osculation. 

But  now  we've  come  to  colder  times, 
And  ne'er  can  our  election  rhymes 

Recount  such  pleasant  stories  ; 
The  kissing  of  the  days  gone  by 
Is  o'er,  like  wine  and  bribery, 

And  old  election  glories. 

No  more  fine  ladies  give  a  kiss 
To  help  a  husband  up  to  this, 

The  height  of  his  ambition, 
To  represent  a  town  or  shire  ; 
'Twould  set  committee-rooms  on  fire 

Such  aid  to  requisition  " 

What  would  ensue  should  the  star  of  "  Woman's  Rights  "  be  in 

o 

the  ascendant  may  be  inferred  from  a  case  which  recently  occurred 
in  France,  where  a  deputation  of  no  less  than  fifty  fair  ones  waited 
upon  a  popular  French  statesman,  and  said  they  had  been  ap 
pointed  "  to  kiss  him."  The  surprised  and  too-highly  flattered  gen 
tleman,  not  wishing  to  appear  ungallant,  had  to  have  recourse  to 
a  good  deal  of  diplomatic  maneuvering  to  escape  the  threatened 
lip-enfilading  contact ;  but  saved  himself  from  a  very  avalanche  of 
feminine  affection — a  tempest  of  blissful  salutation — by  a  political 
ruse,  which  for  the  ladies'  sakes  we  shall  not  here  divulge. 


CHURCH    KISSES. 

With  regard  to  the  saints'  kisses  of  old  time,  we  have  respec 
tively  Paul's  "  Holy  Kiss"  (i  Cor.  xvi.  20),  called  holy  to  distin 
guish  it  from  an  unchaste  and  lascivious  one,  and  from  a  hypocriti- 


KISSING.  431 

cal  and  deceitful  one — such  a  one  as  Joab  gave  to  Amasa  when, 
inquiring  for  his  health,  he  took  him  by  the  beard  to  kiss  him,  and 
stabbed  him  under  the  fifth  rib  ;  and  as  Judas,  who  cried  "  Hail, 
master,"  to  Christ,  and  kissed  him,  and  betrayed  him  into  the  hands 
of  his  enemies.  And  Peter's  "  Love  Kiss"  : — "  Greet  ye  one  another 
with  a  kiss  of  charity,"  (i  Peter  v.  14) — that  unfeigned,  fervent, 
brotherly,  love  kiss,  which  he  had  again  and  again  exhorted  them 
in  this  epistle  to  cherish. 

And  also  Tertullian's  "  Peace  Kiss,"  who,  writing  about  198  A. 
D.,  says  : — "  Another  custom  has  become  prevalent — such  as  are 
fasting  withhold  the  peace  kiss,  which  is  the  seal  of  prayer,  after 
prayer  made  with  brethren.  But  when  is  peace  more  to  be  con 
cluded  with  brethren  than  'when,  at  the  time  of  some  religious 
observance,  our  prayer  ascends  with  more  acceptability  ;  that  they 
may  themselves  participate  in  our  observance,  and  thereby  be  as 
sured  for  transacting  with  their  brother  touching  their  own  peace  ? 
What  prayer  is  complete  if  divorced  from  the  holy  kiss?  Whom 
docs  peace  impede  when  rendering  service  to  the  Lord  ?  What 
kind  of  sacrifice  is  that  from  which  men  depart  without  peace?" 


CLEMENT'S  MYSTIC  KISS. 

Clement,  of  Alexandria,  about  A.  D.  205,  calls  it  the  "Mystic 
Kiss,"  i.  e.,  the  kiss  symbolizing  union  with  Christ.  "If  we  are 
called  to  the  kingdom  of  God,"  he  says,  "  let  us  walk  worthy  of  the 
kingdom,  loving  God  and  our  neighbor.  But  love  is  not  tested  by 
a  kiss,  but  by  kindly  feeling.  But  there  are  those  that  do  nothing 
but  make  the  churches  resound  with  a  kiss,  not  having  love  itself 
within.  For  this  very  thing,  the  shameless  use  of  the  kiss,  which 
ought  to  be  mystic,  occasions  foul  suspicions  and  evil  reports.  The 
apostles  call  the  kiss  holy  " 


432  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

THE    WORD   KISS   AND    ITS   COMPOUNDS. 

The  very  nomenclature  of  the  ancients  prove  the  practice  of 
kissing  among  them,  as  for  instance  the  word  Philemon  means 
"  Him  that  kisses."  And  in  coming  down  to  our  own  day,  we  find 
kiss  in  various  compounds,  and  seeing  it  is  but  a  step  from  Kiss  to 
Kissam,  we  may  here  observe  that  such  \vas  Mrs.  \Y.  H.  Yander- 
bilt's  maiden  name,  and,  strange  to  say,  it  was  her  form  in  the 
shadow  of  a  doorway  late  one  evening,  in  a  street  in  Albany,  that 
startled  young  Vanderbilt's  horse,  and  threw  the  rider,  "  who  fell 
heavily  on  a  pile  of  stones,  striking  the  left  side  of  his  face.  Miss 
Kissam  screamed  and  sprang  forward,  supposing  that  Vanderbilt 
was  either  dead  or  very  badly  hurt.  Hardly  had  she  reached  his 
side  when  he  jumped  up,  shook  himself,  and  brushed  the  dust  from 
his  face. 

'  Arc  —  arc  you  badly  hurt?'  timidly  inquired  the  young  lady. 

'  Not  at  all,  Miss  —  Miss  —  a  —  '  stammered  the  youth 

'  Miss  Kissam/  whispered  the  young  lady,  while  many  blushes 
suffused  her  pretty  face. 

'  Well,  I'm  not  hurt,  Miss  Kissam,'  said  William  H.  Vanderbilt, 
as  he  introduced  himself;  '  but  I  am  pretty  badly  shaken  up.' 

Miss  Kissam  appeared  embarrassed,  and  insisted  upon  young 
Mr.  Vanderbilt  going  to  her  home,  as  he  suddenly  appeared  very 
faint  It  did  not  take  much  persuasion  to  induce  him  to  escort  her 
home.  Here  he  was  introduced  to  Miss  Kissam's  father.  A  pleas 
ant  evening  was  spent,  and  William  proved  such  an  excellent  con 
versationalist  that  when  he  took  his  departure  that  evening  he  was 
invited  to  call  again,  which  he  did  repeatedly  until  they  were 
married." 


KISSING   UNIVERSAL. 

My  muse  in  pleasant  mood  doth  glow, 
And  sings  in  sweet  rehearsal  ; 


KISSING.  433 

How  kisses  multiply  and  grow 
To  custom  universal. 

The  parents  kiss  each  darling  child — 
Child  kisses  father,  mother  ; 

And  brothers  kiss  their  sisters  mild- 
Each  sister  kisses  brother. 

And  those  whom  we  do  "  sweethearts  "  call- 
Euphonious  appelation  ! — 

Will  kiss  while  rolls  this  earthly  ball 
In  every  tribe  and  nation. 

As  long  as  brightness  lives  in  flame 

Will  kissing  go  with  wooing, 
And  turtle  doves  are  not  to  blame 

Whose  billing  follows  cooing. 

Spring  sunshine,  kissing  ice-bound  streams, 

Dissolve  the  chains  that  bind  them, 
And  warmer  winds  with  brighter  gleams 

Tell  summer  comes  behind  them. 

Sweet  zephyrs  kiss  the  amorous  flowers 

That  lift  their  cups  to  bless  them, 
And  fragrant  floods  from  balmy  bowers 

Steal  forth  as  they  caress  them. 

The  planets  kiss  with  lips  of  light, 
(Each  star  is  heaven's  own  daughter) 

And  stoop,  with  beamy  rapture  bright, 
To  kiss  th'  upleaping  water. 

The  mountain  summits  kiss  the  skies 

That  bend  so  sweet  above  them  ; 
Upon  their  brow  the  cloudlet  lies— 

The  fleecy  vapors  love  them. 

The  hills  look  up  like  hope's  own  eyes, 
And  shine  like  dumb  evangels  : 

28* 


434  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

And  human  souls,  that  heavenward  rise, 
Half  kiss  the  beckoning  angels. 

The  kiss  of  love,  and  kiss  of  peace, 
Still  greet  you  in  the  churches — 

The  Spirit's  kiss  from  sin's  release— 
They  are  but  heaven's  porches. 

O  !  kiss  of  promise,  kiss  divine, 

Kiss  holy,  kiss  eternal ! 
Thy  salutation  still  be  mine 

Till  joy  becomes  supernal. 

But  say,  when  time  and  death  are  past, 
And  finished  earthly  story, 

Will  kissing  still  forever  last, 
Do  angels  kiss  in  glory? 

Ye  swains  and  nymphs,  oh  !  purely  kiss 
While  threading  life's  dull  mazes  ; 

Retain  your  souls  as  bright  in  this 
As  beams  that  kiss  the  daisies. 


STOLEN    KISSES. 

But,  alas  !  for  our  exhortations,  whether  uttered  in  prose  or 
verse,  we  apprehend  that  whatever  we,  or  others,  may  say  on  this 
important  subject,  there  will  yet  be  many  who  will  practically 
ignore  or  gainsay  it,  and  continue  to  make  their  salutations  mere 
waifs,  to  light  wherever  chance  may  direct  them  ;  and 

Who  will  merely  kiss  for  kissing's  sake, 
Though  sad  eyes  weep  and  kind  hearts  break. 

Or.  perhaps,  they  will  quote,  with  evident  relish,  from  the  foolish 
lips  of  profligate  vice  the  tempting  text  of  the  "stolen  waters,"  &c..( 
or,  perchance,  they  will  sing  with  a  grim  satisfaction,  and  a  grievous 


KISSING.  435 

application  withal,  the  gay  song  of  the  felonious  fairies,  engaged  in 
robbing  an  orchard  by  moonlight,  which,  translated  from  the  Latin 
by  Leigh  Hunt,  sounds  merrily  enough  as  it  issues  from  the  lips  of 
fabled  elves  and  mythic,  span-long  fays,  but  not  so  edifying,  indeed, 
when  proceeding  from  the  mouths  of  living  mortals  :— 

We,  the  Fairies,  blithe  and  antic, 
Of  dimensions  not  gigantic, 
Though  the  moonshine  mostly  keep  us 
Oft  in  orchards  frisk  and  peep  us. 

Stolen  sweets  are  always  sweeter, 
Stolen  kisses  much  complcter  ; 
Stolen  looks  are  nice  in  chapels, 
Stolen,  stolen  be  your  apples. 

When  to  bed  the  world  arc  bobbing 
Then's  the  time  for  orchard  robbing  ; 
Yet  the  fruit  were  scarce  worth  peeling 
Were  it  not  for  stealing,  stealing. 


BIBLE    KISSES. 

These  sacredly-recorded  kisses  are  various  and  numerous,  and 
almost  all  kindred  relationships  are  represented.  We  have  a 
brother's  kiss  in  Aaron,  who  meets  Moses  on  the  mount  and  kisses 
him  ;  a  father's  kiss,  in  Isaac  kissing  Jacob,  and  a  son's  kiss,  in 
Jacob  kissing  Isaac,  as  also  in  Elisha  saying,  "  Let  me,  I  pray  thee, 
kiss  my  father  and  my  mother,  and  then  I  will  follow  thce."  Then 
a  son-in-law's  kiss  salutes  us  in  Moses,  who  meets  his  father-in-law 
and  kisses  him  ;  and  a  mother-in-law's  salutation  in  Naomi,  com 
bined  with  a  good  wish,  when  she  says,  "  The  Lord  grant  that  ye 
may  find  rest,  each  of  you  in  the  house  of  her  husband."  Then  she 
kissed  them,  and  they  wept. 

We  behold  in  the  Bible,  too,  how  kissing  and  blessing  go  to 
other— twin  beauties  that  should  seldom  be  found  apart.  Thus 

t> 


436  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

Isaac  kisses  Jacob  and  blesses  him.  Laban,  too,  rises  up  "early  in 
the  morning,  to  kiss  his  sons  and  daughters  and  blesses  them,  and 
departs."  Also  kissing  and  weeping  quite  as  frequently  "  keep 
company."  Even  as  Jacob  kisseth  Rachel  and  lifteth  up  his  voice 
and  weeps.  And  as  Esau,  already  mentioned,  Naomi,  David  and 
others,  wept. 

Besides  all  these,  we  have  a  kiss  of  complete  reconciliation  fur 
nished  us  in  Joseph's  kissing  all  his  brethren,  after  which  "  they 
talked  with  him."  And  another  in  David's  kissing  Absalom  at 
court,  after  several  years  of  enforced  absence. 

And  to  close  the  list,  we  have  the  farewell  kiss  presented  not 
only  in  many  of  the  cases  already  mentioned,  but  also  in  that  of  the 
church's  adieu  to  Paul,  when  they  fell  on  his  neck  and  kissed  him, 
sorrowing  most  of  all  for  the  words  which  he  spake  that  they  should 
see  his  face  no  more  ;  and  a  mourner's  kiss  in  Joseph,  who,  after 
Jacob  was  dead,  fell  upon  his  father's  face  and  kissed  him,  and 
wept  over  him. 


THE    OUTWARD     FORM     THEREOF. 


HE  word  "beauty"  is  applied  to  the  person,  particularly 
in  the  female  sex  in  an  eminent  manner,  and  the  desires 
and  pleasures  arising  from  beauty  in  this  may  be  con 
sidered  an  intermediate  step  between  the  gross,  sensual 
ones  and  those  of  pure  esteem  and  benevolence  :  for  they 
are  in  part  deduced  from  both  these  extremes  ;  they  mod 
erate,  spiritualize  and  improve  the  first,  and,  in  the  virtue,  are  ulti 
mately  connected  with  the  last. 

But  they  arise  also  from  many  other  sources  in  their  intermedi 
ate  state,  particularly  from  associations  with  the  several  beauties  of 
nature  and  art  already  mentioned,  as  of  gay  colors,  rural  scenes, 
music,  painting  and  poetry  ;  from  associations  with  fashion,  the 
opinions  and  encomiums  of  others,  riches,  honors,  high  birth,  &c., 
from  vanity  and  ambition. 

That  part  of  beauty  which  arises  from  symmetry  maybe  said 
to  consist  in  such  proportions  of  the  features  of  the  face,  and  of  the 
head,  trunk  and  limbs  to  each  other,  as  are  intermediate  in  respect 
of  all  other  proportions,  /.  e.  such  proportions  as  would  result  from 
an  estimation  by  an  average.  One  may  say,  at  least,  that  these 
proportions  would  not  differ  much  from  perfect  symmetry. — Hartley. 


433 


440  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

One  writer  affirms  that  :— "  Beauty  is  the  outward  form  of 
goodness  ;  and  this  is  the  reason  we  love  it  instinctively,  without 
thinking  why  we  love  ;  but  we  cease  to  love  when  we  find  it  un 
accompanied  with  truth  and  goodness." 

Beauty  depends  more  upon  the  movement  of  the  face  than  upon 
the  form  of  the  features  when  at  rest.  Thus  a  countenance  habitu 
ally  under  the  influence  of  amiable  feelings  acquires  a  beauty  of  the 
highest  order  from  the  frequency  with  which  such  feelings  are  the 
originating  causes  of  the  movement  or  expressions  which  stamp 
their  character  upon  it—Mrs.  S.  C.  Hall. 

\  face  that  should  content  me  wondrous  well, 

Should  not  be  fair,  but  lovely  to  behold  : 

Of  lively  look,  all  grief  for  to  repel 

With  right  good  grace,  so  would  I  that  it  should 

Speak  without  word,  such  words  as  none  can  tell. 

— Sir  Thomas  Wyatt. 

Remember,  if  thou  marry  for  beauty,  thou  bindest  thyself  all 
thy  life  for  that  which  perchance  will  neither  last  nor  please  thee 
one  year  ;  and  when  thou  hast  it,  it  wilt  be  to  thee  of  no  price  at 
all.— Raleigh. 

'  There  is  a  wide  difference  between  admiration  and  love.  The 
sublime,  which  is  the  cause  of  the  former,  always  dwells  on  great 
objects  and  terrible,  the  latter  on  small  ones,  and  pleasing  ;  we  sub 
mit  to  what  we  admire,  but  we  love  what  submits  to  us  ;  in  one 
case  we  arc  forced,  in  the  other  we  arc  flattered,  into  compliance. 

Nought  under  heaven  so  strongly  doth  allure 
The  sense  of  man,  and  all  his  mind  possess, 
As  beauty's  lovely  bait,  that  doth  procure 
Great  warriors  oft  their  rigor  to  repress 
And  mighty  hands  to  forget  their  manliness  ; 
Drawn  with  the  power  of  an  heart-robbing  eye, 
And  wrapped  in  fetters  of  a  golden  tress 


BEAUTY.  441 

That  can  with  melting  pleasancc  molify 

Their  hardened  hearts,  enured  to  blood  and  cruelty. 

— Spensci. 

We  may  safely  acknowledge,  and  as  well  at  the  first  as  at  the 
last,  that  among  all  fair  things  there  is  nothing  quite  so  fair  as  a 
fair  countenance.  It  combines  all  other  fairnesses  in  one,  and 
blends  all  conceivable  brightnesses  together. 

All  the  graces  seem  to  sit,  like  a  galaxy  of  queens,  within  the 
comely  compass  of  the  charming,  facial  circle.  There  is  a  whole 
system  of  beauties  there.  The  rose  blooms  in  her  cheeks  ;  the  lily 
glows  in  her  brow  and  neck  ;  the  ruby  glitters  in  her  moving  lips — 
Solomon's  "  thread  of  scarlet ;"  and  the  very  blue  of  the  sky,  or  the 
"  body  of  heaven  in  its  clearness,"  wells  its  lustre  in  those  speaking, 
sparkling,  sapphire-blazing  eyes  ;  while  the  shining  hair  falls  grace 
ful  on  either  side,  and  in  rival  profusion,  like  the  curtains  of  a 
king's  pavilion,  where,  as  in  Ahasuerus'  tent,  there  are  "white,  green 
and  blue  hangings,  fastened  with  cords  of  fine  linen  and  purple  to 
silver  rings  and  pillars  of  marble." 

"Queen  Virtue's  court,  which  some  call  Stella's  tacc, 
Prepared  by  Nature's  choicest  furniture, 
Hath  his  front  built  of  alabaster  pure, 
Gold  is  the  covering  of  that  stately  place  ; 
The  door,  by  which  sometimes  comes  forth  her  grace, 
Red  porphyr  is,  which  lock  of  pearl  makes  sure, 
Whose  porches  rich — which  name  of  checks  endurc- 
Marble,  mixt  red  and  white,  do  interlace. 
The  windows  now,  through  which  this  heavenly  guest 
Looks  o'er  the  world,  and  can  find  nothing  such 
Which  dare  claim  from  those  lights  the  name  of  best, 
Of  touch  they  are,  that  without  touch  do  touch, 
Which  Cupid's  self  from  Beauty's  mind  did  draw, 
Of  touch  they  are,  and,  poor,  I  am  their  straw." 
How  few  of  us,  alas  !   are   proof  against   the  charm  of  mere 
aspect,  appearance,  >-ountenance. 


442  PROPOSAL  AND   ESPOUSAL. 

Well  might  Justice  be  painted  blind,  that  she  might  weigh  all 
cases  of  all  classes  in  an  even  balance. 

Some  of  the  ancient  judges  held  their  court  at  night  that  they 
might  not  see  the  countenance  of  the  prisoners,  nor  be  able  to  dis 
tinguish  friend  from  foe,  nor  relative  from  stranger. 

It  is  not  without  its  significance,  therefore,  that  in  the  non-age 
of  the  world— the  age  of  type  and  shadow— we  find  beauty  bestowed 
on  man  as  one  of  the  special  gifts  of  heaven.  God  gave  all  the 
patriarchs  beautiful  wives,  every  one  of  them.  Sarah,  Abraham's 
wife,  was  fair  to  look  upon  ;  Rachel,  Jacob's  wife,  was  well-favored  ; 
Joseph,  tradition  says,  won  the  "  pearl  ot  Egypt,"  in  the  daughter 
of  Potipherah,  the  priest  of  On  (or  the  sun),  and  Joseph  himself, 
says  the  Talmud,  was  almost  heavenly/air,  and  drew  all  eyes  toward 
him  as  he  passed  along,  which  would  make  the  proclamation  all 
the  more  agreeable,  as  it  rang  before  his  riding  chariot,  "Bow  the 
knee " — which  beauty  may  also  have  been  the  cause  of  his  sore 
temptation  and  severe  sufferings. 

Daniel  and  his  compatriots  in  Babylon  were  the  fairest  of  all 
the  Jews  in  captivity  :— 

"  Children  in  whom  there  was  no  blemish,  but  well  favored,  and 
skilful  in  all  wsidom,  and  cunning  in  knowledge,  and  understanding 
science,  and  such  as  had  ability  in  them  to  stand  in  the  king's  pal 
ace,  and  whom  they  might  teach  the  learning  and  the  tongue  of 
the  Chaldeans. 

"  And  the  king  communed  with  them  ;  and  among  them  all 
was  found  none  like  Daniel,  Hananiah,  Mishael  and  Azariah,  there 
fore  stood  they  before  the  king." 

Then  let  not  cynicism  sneer,  nor  envy  look  askance,  neither 
base  curmudgeonism,  with  his  strange,  conglomerate  name,  never 
heard  in  heaven,  dispense  trite  maxims  such  as,  "Beauty  buys  no 
beef,"  "  Beauty  is  no  inheritance,"  "  Beauty  is  only  for  a  day,"  &c., 
&c;  for  unheeding  all  these  flings  and  flouts  that  compass  her 


BEAUTY.  443 

about  like  bees,  and  buzz  disapprobation  on  her  fair  form,  lo  !  the 
moon  of  beauty  rides  on  in  the  firmament  of  her  own  inviolable 
supremacy,  and  goes  forth  "  walking  in  brightness,"  and  "  looking 
around  her  with  the  heavens  all  bare,"  for 

*  *  "  Tis  the  eternal  law 

That  first  in  beauty  shall  be  first  in  might." 

To  give  pain  is  the  tyranny,  to  make  happy  is  the  empire,  of 
beauty. — Johnson. 

Beauty,  without  kindness,  dies  unenjoyed  and  undelighting.— 
—Ibid. 

"  Beauty  is  only  skin  deep,"  says  the  old  proverb,  but  the  saying 
itself  is  no  deeper.  It  is  physically  untrue,  for  beauty  is  not  an 
accident  of  surface,  but  a  natural  result  and  attribute  of  a  fine  organ 
ization.  A  man  may  sneer,  like  Ralph  Nickleby,  at  a  lovely  face, 
because  he  chooses  rather  to  see  "  the  grinning  death's  head  be 
neath  it  ;"  but  Ralph  was  a  heartless  villain,  and  that  is  only 
another  name  for  a  fool.  "  Beauty  is  one  of  God's  gifts,"  says  Mr. 
Lewes,  "  and  every  one  really  submits  to  its  influence,  whatever 
platitudes  he  may  think  needful  to  issue. 

How,  think  you,  should  we  ever  have  relished  the  immortal  frag 
ments  of  Greek  literature,  if  our  conception  of  Greek  men  and  Greek 
women  had  been  formed  by  the  contemplation  of  figures  such  as 
those  of  Chinese  art  ?  Would  any  pulse  have  throbbed  at  the  Lab- 
dacidan  tale  had  the  descendants  of  Labdacus  risen  before  the 
imagination  with  obese  rotundity,  large  ears,  gashes  of  mouths,  eyes 
lurching  upwards  towards  the  temples,  and  no  nose  to  speak  of  ? 
Could  we  with  any  sublime  emotions  picture  to  ourselves  Fo-Ti  on 
the  Promethean  rock,  or  a  Congou-Antigone  wailing  her  unwedded 
death  ?" — Proverbs  of  all  Nations. 

"Arrayed  in  all  her  charms,  appeared  the  fair: 
Tall  was  her  stature,  unconfined  her  hair  ; 
Proportion  decked  her  limbs,  and  in  her  face 


/;4<-  PROPOSAL   AND    ESPOUSAL. 

Lay  love  enshrined,  lay  sweet  attractive  grace, 
Tempering  the  awful  beams  her  eyes  conveyed. 
And,  like  a  lambent  flame,  around  her  played. 

—Lisle. 

As  lamps  burn  silent,  with  unconscious  light, 
So  modest  ease  in  beauty  shines  most  bright  ; 
Unaiming  charms  with  edge  resistless  fall, 
And  she  who  meant  no  mischief  does  it  all. 

— Prior. 

It  is  not  everybody,  however,  who  is  a  judge  of  true  beauty 
even  when  it  is  placed  directly  before  them  ;  but  human  fancy  is 
in  this,  as  in  everything  else,  very  whimsical  and  capricious,  proving 
the  truth  of  the  old  proverb,  ""  What  is  one  man's  meat  is  another 
man's  poison."  Therefore  it  is  said  : — • 

Beauty,  like  wit,  to  judges  should  be  shown  ; 
Both  arc  most  valued  where  they  best  are  known. 

— Lord  Lyttleton. 

Yet  there  is  a  majesty  in  beauty,  and  a  sweet-insinuating,  silent- 
captivating  power  that  cannot  wholly  be  ignored,  even  by  the  most 
callous  and  apathetic  natures  ;  and  which,  like  the  identity  of  spir 
itual  bodies  and  of  holy  intelligence,  grandly  proves  itself! — for  its 
brightness  is  as  strikingly  lustrous  and  unique  as  the  glory  of  the 
"  bow  in  the  cloud  on  the  day  of  rain,"  peerless  and  incomparable  : 

"Oh,  richly  fell  the  flaxen  hair 
Over  the  maiden's  shoulders  fair  ! 
On  every  feature  of  her  face 
Sat  radiant  modesty  and  grace  ; 
Her  tender  eyes  were  mild  and  bright, 
And  through  her  robes  of  shadowy  white 
The  delicate  outline  of  her  form 
Shone  like  an  iris  through  a  storm." 

And  we  may  ask  further,  with  Byron  : — 

"Who  hath  not  proved  how  feebly  words  assay 
To  fix  one  spark  of  Beauty's  heavenly  ray? 


BEAUTY.  445 

Who  doth  not  feel,  until  his  failing  sight 
Faints  into  dimness  with  its  own  delight,  . 
His  changing  cheek,  his  sinking  heart  confess 
The  might — the  majesty  of  Loveliness  ?'' 

And  what  foible,  pray,  is  more  generously  ana  generally  excus 
able  in  a  parent  than  the  pride  of  being  the  progenitor  of  gentle 
loveliness,  and  of  adding  to  the  desirable  sum  of  the  world's  great 
wealth  of  living  bloom  and  fair-augmenting  beauty.  Even  as  in 
dicated  in  the  following  paragraph  from  a  standard  author  : 

"  It  would  be  fruitless  to  deny  exultation  when  I  saw  my  little 
ones  about  me  :  but  the  vanity  and  satisfaction  of  my  wife  were 
even  greater  than  mine.  When  our  visitors  would  say,  '  Well,  upon 
my  word,  Mrs.  Primrose,  you  have  the  finest  children  in  the  whole- 
country  ;' — '  Ay,  neighbor,'  she  would  answer,  '  they  arc  as  heaven 
made  them,  handsome  enough  if  they  be  good  enough  ;  for  hand 
some  is  that  handsome  does.'  And  then  she  would  bid  the  girls 
hold  up  their  heads  ;  who,  to  conceal  nothing,  were  certainly  very 
handsome.  Mere  outside  is  so  very  trifling  a  circumstance  with 
me,  that  I  should  scarcely  have  remembered  to  mention  it  had  it 
not  been  a  general  topic  of  conversation  in  the  country.  Olivia, 
now  about  eighteen,  had  that  luxuriance  of  beauty  with  which 
painters  generally  drew  Hebe  ;  open,  sprightly  and  commanding. 
Sophia's  features  were  not  so  striking  at  first,  but  often  did  more 
certain  execution  ;  for  they  were  soft,  modest  and  alluring.  The 
one  vanquished  by  a  single  blow,  the  others  by  efforts  successfully 
repeated. — Goldsmiths  Vicar  of  Wakefield. 

Her  face  had  a  wonderful  fascination  in  it.  It  was  such  a  calm, 
quiet  face,  with  the  light  of  the  rising  soul  shining  sc  peacefully 
through  it.  At  times  it  wore  an  expression  of  generousness,  of 
sorrow  even  ;  and  then  seemed  to  make  the  air  very  bright  with 
what  the  Italian  poets  so  beautifully  call  the  the  "  lampeggiar  del, 
angelica  riso" — the  lightning  of  the  angelic  smile. — Longfellow. 


44°"  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

Yet  beauty,  gayly  and  fondly  as  its  possession  may  be  borne  or 
regarded,  is  nevertheless  a  grave  trust,  and  not  to  be  basely  es 
teemed.  What  Young,  the  poet,  says  of  wit,  may  with  equal  pro 
priety  be  applied  to  physical  loveliness,  that,  oftentimes, 

"  It  hoists  more  sail  to  run  against  a  rock." 

The  more  airy,  and  light,  the  elegant  yacht,  the  more  need  of 
the  deep-balancing  ballast  to  steady  her  swift  course.  The  more 
noticeable  the  personnel,  the  more  careful  should  one  be  to  carry  it 
well.  That  Scripture  proverb  is  still  in  force,  and  not  to  be  con 
temned  because  it  soundeth  blunt  and  very  curt,  which  says,  "  As  a 
jewel  of  gold  in  a  swine's  snout,  so  is  a  fair  woman  without 
discretion." 

How  vain  are  all  these  glories,  all  our  pains, 
Unless  good  sense  preserve  what  beauty  gains. 

*  *  #  ;;c  * 

Beauties,  in  vain,  their  pretty  eyes  may  roll ; 

Charms  strike  the  sight,  but  merit  wins  the  soul. — Pope. 

The  brighter  the  light  the  more  perilous,  if  it  be  but  the  vvill-o- 
the-wisp  to  lead  you  into  the  mire  : 

"So  millions  are  smit  with  the  glare  of  a  toy  ; 
They  grasp  at  a  pebble  and  call  it  a  gem 
And  tinsel  is  gold,  if  it  glitters,  to  them  ; 
Hence,  dazzled  with  beauty,  the  lover  is  smit, 
The  hero  with  honor,  the  poet  with  wit ; 
The  fop  with  his  feather,  his  snuff-box  and  cane 
The  nymph  with  her  novel,  the  merchant  with  gain." 

Beauty  is  but  a  vain  and  doubtful  good, 

A  shining  gloss  that  fadeth  suddenly  ; 

A  flower  that  dieth  when  first  it  'gins  to  bud  ; 

A  brittle  glass  that's  broken  presently  ; 

A  doubtful  good,  a  gloss,  a  glass,  a  flower, 

Lost,  faded,  broken,  dead  within  an  hour. — SJiakespeare. 


BEAUTY.  447 

"  Beauty  is  a  disastrous  property,  tending  to  corrupt  the  mind 
of  the  wife,  though  it  soon  loses  its  influence  over  the  husband.  A 
figure  agreeable  and  engaging,  which  inspires  affection  without  the 
ebriety  of  love,  is  a  much  safer  choice.  The  graces  lose  not  their 
innocence  like  beauty.  At  the  end  of  thirty  years  a  virtuous  woman, 
who  makes  an  agreeable  companion,  charms  her  husband  more 
than  at  the  first" 

Xenophon  has  well  said  that  beauty  is  more  catching  than  fire. 
"  Fire  burns  only  when  we  are  near  it  ;  but  a  beautiful  face  burns 
and  inflames  though  at  a  distance." 

Zimmerman  wisely  affirms  that  "  beauty  is  worse  than  wino,  it 
intoxicates  both  the  holder  and  the  beholder."  And  \ve  have 
known  some  that  were  inebriated  all  the  time. 

While  Socrates,  who  seems  to  have  had  a  lovely  or  comely  virago 
for  a  wife,  whose  smile  was  but  "a  sunbeam  o'er  a  gulf  of  guile," 
called  beauty  "a  short-lived  tyranny  ;  Plato,  a  privilege  of  nature  ; 
Theophrastus,  a  silent  cheat  ;  Theocritus,  a  delightful  prejudice  ; 
Careades,  a  solitary  kingdom  ;  Domitian  said  that  nothing  was  more 
grateful  ;  Aristotle  affirmed  that  beauty  was  better  than  all  the 
letters  of  recommendation  in  the  world  ;  Homer,  that  'twas  a  glori 
ous  gift  of  nature  ;  and  Ovid  calls  it  a  favor  bestowed  by  the  gods." 

Eliza  Cook,  with  her  usual  felicity  of  expression,  plays  a  some 
what  telling  though  amusing  change  on  that  sweet  chime  of  silvery 
word-bells,  "  A  thing  of  beauty  is  a  joy  forever,"  by  singing: 

"'A  thing  of  beauty  is  a  joy  for  ever.' 

Oh  !  pleasant  music-words  ;  and  often  sung : 

But  some  pert  brains,  more  cynical  than  clever, 
Like  mine,  just  now,  may  tax  with  idle  tongue 

The  laurelled  speech  which  seems  to  say  that  never 
Can  aught  be  beautiful  but  what  is  young, 

And  fair,  and  charming — yet  a  question  may 

Arise  on  what  our  very  Miltons  say. 


PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

A  woman's  rosy  mouth  is  good  to  see, 

With  its  soft,  sculptured  lines  cut  cleanly  out  ; 

A  "thing  of  beauty  "  it  must  surely  be ! 
But  for  the  rest  there  may  exist  a  doubt. 

To  hear  it  scold,  through  breakfast,  lunch,  and  tea, 
Is  apt  to  put  the  best  digestion  out  ; 

Xo  "joy  forever  "  is  the  ruby  mouth  • 

That  blows  much  oftener  from  nor'-east  than  south." 

1  The  beauty  of  the  air,  gesture,  motions  and  dress  has  a  great 
connection  with  the  beauty  of  the  person,  or  rather  makes  a  "con 
siderable  part  of  it,  contributing  much  to  the  sum  total  ;  and  when 
considered  separately  receiving  much  from  the  other  part  of  the 
beauties  of  the  person.  The  separate  beauty  of  these  things  arises 
from  some  imitation  of  a  natural  or  artificial  beauty  already  estab 
lished,  from  fashion,  high-birth,  &c.,  or  from  their  being  expressive 
of  some  agreeable  or  amiable  quality  of  mind. 

Beauty  has  the  highest  encomiums  bestowed  upon  it  in  books, 
especially  in  such  as  are  too  much  in  the  hands  of  young  person  , 
has  the  highest  compliments  paid  to  it  in  discourse,  and  is  often  the 
occasion  of  success  in  life;  all  of  which  holds  more  particularly 
in  respect  of  women  than  of  men.  No  wonder,  therefore,  that  both 
sexes,  but  especially  women,  should  desire  both  to  be  and  be  thought 
beautiful,  and  be  pleased  with  all  the  associated  circumstances  of 
these  things  ;  and  that  the  fear  of  being  or  being  thought  deformed 
should  be  a  thing  to  which  the  imagination  has  the  greatest  possi 
ble  reluctance." 

"To  meet  the  requirement  of  a  classic  figure  a  lady  should  be 
5  feet  4^  inches  tall,  32  inches  bust  measure,  24  inches  waist,  9 
inches  from  armpit  to  waist,  long  arms  and  neck.  A  queenly  wo 
man,  however,  should  be  5  feet  5  inches  tall,  31  inches  about  the 
bust,  26y2  about  the  waist,  35  over  the  hips,  1 1  j£  inches  around  the 
ball  of  the  arm,  and  6*/2  inches  around  the  wrist.  Her  hands  and 
feet  should  not  be  too  small." 


BEAUTY.  449 

Now,  we  may  venture  to  affirm,  on  the  best  authority,  and  sup 
ported  by  abundance  of  irrefragable  and  undisputed  proof,  that 
virtue  is  the  best  promoter  and  preserver  of  beauty,  even  in  the 
complexion  itself,  and  divine  grace  is  the  greatest  conservator  of 
native  grace.  "  A  man's  wisdom  maketh  his  face  to  shine,"  and 
goodness  literally  looks  out  at  the  skin. 

To  get  bloom  in  the  face  we  must  have  pure  blood  at  the  heart 
God  made  the  match  between  beauty  and  piety  and  any  attempt 
at  divorce  can  only  be  attended  with  discomfort  and  disaster.  Vice 
never  fails,  in  the  end,  to  stamp  its  impress  on  the  brow  ;  nor  virtue 
to  leave  her  impression  there.  Believers  are  termed  "  children  of 
light,"  and  grace  tends  to  beautify  and  brighten  even  the  outward 
expression.  Unbelievers,  on  the  contrary,  are  in  a  kingdom  of 
darkness,  and  all  the  vices,  without  exception,  serve  to  darken  the 
face  as  well  as  the  soul.  •'  The  show  of  their  countenance  cloth 
witness  against  them,"  it  is  said  of  tr?  sinners  in  Zion  ;  while  of  the 
saints  in  Jerusalem  it  is  declared,  "Their  countenance  is  comely." 

O  !  pleasant  is  beauty 

When  wedded  to  duty, 
Rejoicing  in  brightness  she  onward  cloth  go  : 

Still  consciously  glowing, 

Her  light  she  is  sowing, 
And  reigns  in  her  glory  while  dwelling  below. 

Wherever  she  liveth 

Her  good  cheer  she  giveth, 
And  gladdens  alike  both  the  palace  and  cot ; 

Benign  is  her  mission, 

No  rank  nor  condition  ! 

But  haileth  her  presence  to  brighten  their  lot. 

With  charms  never  palling, 
But  gratefully  falling, 
Like  clew  on  the  grass  in  the  night  of  earth's  tears  ; 

29* 


450  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

Diffusing  her  graces, 
She  gladdens  all  places, 
Like  the  light  of  the  stars  or  the  song  of  the  spheres. 

But,  alas  !  when  fair  beauty, 

Divorced  from  high  duty, 
Forgettcth  her  Maker,  the  guide  of  her  youth  ! 

Yonder  bright  stone  of  fire, 

Swine-rooted  in  mire, 
Is  the  type  of  her  baseness  as  drawn  by  the  truth 

Like  Judea's  daughters 
By  Chaldea's  waters, 

Like  seraph  that  falls  from  the  mountain  of  God  ; 
Defiled  is  her  glory- 
Reproach  ends  her  story — 

A  captive  in  sackcloth,  oppressed  and  down-trod. 

Fashionable  sinners  have  sometimes  been  scared,  as  it  were, 
from  a  career  of  pleasing  vice  by  merely  seeing  themselves  in  the 
mirror — that  monitor  that  would  not  flatter,  but  like  Queen  Eliza 
beth's  painter,  put  in  all  the  wrinkles. 

Dr.  Budington  tells  of  a  young  woman  who  came  to  see  him  once 
about  joining  his  church.  He  asked  her  what  made  her  first  think 
of  wanting  to  become  a  Christian.  She  said  it  was  because  she 
found  she  was  growing  so  ugly.  She  looked  in  the  glass  one  day 
when  she  was  very  angry,  and  was  fairly  frightened  to  see  how  ugly 
she  looked.  She  found  that  the  bad  tempers  she  was  giving  way 
to  were  making  ugly  marks  upon  her  face.  She  was  afraid  to 
think  what  this  would  grow  to  by  and  by.  This  led  her  to  think 
what  a  dreadful  thing  sin  must  be.  Then  she  prayed  to  Jesus  to 
take  away  her  sin,  and  make  her  a  Christian.  This  young  woman 
was  right.  What  she  said  was  true.  There  is  nothing  that  will 
help  to  make  us  look  ugly  sooner  than  giving  way  to  bad  temper. 


BEAUTY.  451 

And  if  we  want  to  make  ourselves  look  beautiful,  there  is  no  better 
way  than  by  trying  to  be  like  Jesus." 

"What  is  beauty  ?     Not  the  show 
Of  shapely  limbs  and  features.     Xo. 
These  are  but  flowers 
That  have  their  dated  hours 
To  breathe  their  momentary  sweets,  then  go  ; 
'Tis  the  stainless  soul  within 
That  outshines  the  fairest  skin." 

"At  the  last  meeting  which  the  late  venerable  Dr.  Marsh  held 
in  his  rectory  grounds  at  Beddington,  he  being  then  above  ninety 
years  of  age,  and  just  on  the  eve  of  his  departure  for  heaven,  two 
Afghans  stood  behind  his  chair.  One  of  them  was  so  impressed  by 
the  loveliness  of  character  exhibited  by  the  aged  saint,  that,  on 
hearing  of  his  death  shortly  after,  he  exclaimed,  "  His  religion  shall 
now  be  my  religion  ;  his  God  shall  be  my  God  ;  for  I  must  go  where 
he  is,  and  see  his  face  again." 

In  his  old  age  Dr.  Marsh  gathered  round  him  many  of  the 
young  cadets  from  Addiscombe  College,  some  of  whom  became 
devotedly  attached  to  him.  One  lad,  while  lingering  for  a  parting 
word,  exclaimed  to  a  companion,  "  What  is  the  use  of  being  young 
when  one  sees  a  man  of  eighty  in  better  spirits  than  the  jolliest 
among  us  ?" — Teacher's  Note-Book. 


BEAUTIES. 


ENGLISH     BEAUTIES. 


Mr.  Greely's  last  letter  from  Europe  to  the  New  York 
t;'rd       Tribune,  he  speaks  of  the   English   women,   and  com- 
^^J|H$      mends  their  perfection  of  figure.      He  attributes  this  to 

'  !,^^Cj^,^£  V 

ATvJSr^      the  English  lady's  habit  of  out-of-door  exercise.     We 

X^ '  ])      had  thought  that  this  fact   was   well   known  ;   that  it  was 

known  years  ago,  and  that  our  fair  countrywomen   would 

catch  a  hint  from  it  that  would  throw  color   into  their  cheeks  and 

fulness  into  their  forms.       And  yet,   sadly  enough,  our  ladies  will 

coop  themselves  in   their  heated   rooms,  until   their  faces  are  like 

lilies,  and  their  figures  like  lily-stems." 

'  A  feature  of  the  exhibition  of  a  firm  of  London  tailors  in  New 
York  is  the  showing  of  garments  on  living  models — not  pretty 
girls  hired  for  the  service — but  genuine  English  beauties,  imported 
so  freshly  that  their  London  accent  is  not  yet  in  the  slightest  de 
gree  impaired. 

There  are  fifteen  of  them,  and  all  young,  with  handsome  faces 
and  slender,  lithe,  shapely  figures,  on  which  the  clothes  are  dis 
played  to  the  best  possible  advantage.  They  chat  agreeably  with 
the  crowd  of  shoppers,  strike  effective  attitudes,  and  walk  about 
with  a  gait  presumably  that  of  the  most  approved  London  belles." 

452 


As  placets  ask  no  aid  of  tbeir  sister  orbs  to  shine, 

But,  sphered  in  native  splendor,  adorn  the  glittering  sky; 

So  beauty  brightly  beams  with  effulgence  half  divine, 

Attracting  to  her  lustre  the  world's  admidng  eye  :— 

But  with  radiance  more  sublime,  that  transcends  the  bounds  of  time. 

Brave  virtue  beareth  starward,  rejoicing  in  her  prime. 


BEAUTIES.  453 

"May  my  song  soften,  as  thy  daughters  I, 
Britannia,  hail  ;  for  beauty  is  their  own, 
The  feeling  heart,  simplicity  of  life, 
And  elegance,  and  taste  ;  the  faultless  form, 
Shaped  by  the  hand  of  harmony  ;  the  cheek, 
Where  the  live  crimson,  through  the  native  white 
Soft  shooting,  o'er  the  face  diffuses  bloom, 
And  every  nameless  grace  ;  the  parted  lip, 
Like  the  red  rose  bud  moist  with  morning  dew, 
Breathing  delight ;  and,  under  flowing  jet, 
Or  sunny  ringlets,  or  of  circling  brown, 
The  neck  slight-shaded,  and  the  swelling  breast ; 
The  look  resistless,  piercing  to  the  soul, 
And  by  the  soul  informed,  when  dressed  in  love, 
She  sits  high-smiling  in  the  conscious  eve." 

"She  laughs  and  runs — a  cherub  thing— 
And  proud  is  the  doting  sire 

To  see  her  pull  the  flowers  of  spring, 
Or  play  by  the  winter  fire. 

Her  nut-brown  hair  falls  thick  and  fail- 
In  many  a  glossy  curl  ; 

And  freshly  sleek  is  the  ruddy  cheek 
Of  the  infant  English  girl. 

The  years  steal  on,  and  day  by  day 

Her  native  charms  expand  ; 
Her  round  face  meets  the  summer  ray, 

Like  the  rose  of  her  own  blest  land. 
There's  music  in  her  laughing  tone, 

A  gold  gleam  through  her  curl  ; 
And  beauty  makes  her  chosen  throne 

On  the  brow  of  the  English  girl. 

She  is  standing  now,  a  happy  bride, 
By  the  holy  altar  rail  ; 


454  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

While  the  sacred  blush  of  maiden  pride 
Gives  a  tinge  to  the  snowy  veil. 

Her  eye  of  light  is  the  diamond  bright, 
Her  innocence  the  pearl  ; 

And  these  are  the  richest  bridal  gems 
That  are  worn  by  the  English  girl. 


AMERICAN     BEAUTIES 

"The  frankness  of  the  American  young  women,"  writes  Archi 
bald  Forbes,  "  has  in  it,  on  the  threshold,  a  certain  bewilderment 
and  even  embarrassment  for  the  British  male  person,  especially  if 
his  collars  be  too  stiffly  starched.  She  has  so  utter  an  apparent 
absence  of  self-consciousness,  her  mental  equipoise  is  so  serenely 
stable,  her  good-fellowship,  if  one  may  use  the  term,  is  so  natural, 
that  he  cannot  see  his  way  easily  to  the  solution  of  the  problem. 
I  assume  him  to  be  a  gentleman,  so  that  his  intuition  deters  him 
from  a  misconception  of  the  phenomena  that  confront  him. 

She  flirts  :  she  is  an  adept  in  flirtation,  but  it  is  a  flirtation  from 
'  the  teeth  outwards,'  to  use  Carlyle's  phrase,  and  he  is  fain  to  own  to 
himself,  like  the  fox-hunting  farmer  we  tried  unsuccessfully  to  get 
drunk  on  claret,  that  he  seems  to  'get  no  forader.'  But  although 
the  citadel  of  the  fort  seems  to  him  strangely  impregnable,  because 
of  the  cool,  alert,  self-possession  of  the  garrison,  I  have  been  told 
by  heroic  persons,  who  ventured  in  the  escalade,  that,  if  the  be 
leaguer  be  him  whom  fortune  favors,  it  will  terminate  an  honorable 
seige  by  a  graceful  capitulation." 


TRADITIONAL  BEAUTIES. 

And  Pharoah  called  Joseph's  name  Zaphnath-paancah  ;  and  he 
gave  him  to  wife  Asenath,  the  daughter  of  Poti-pherah,  priest  of 
On.  And  Joseph  went  out  over  all  the  land  of  Egypt. — Bible. 


BEAUTIES.  455 

And  it  came  to  pass  after  this  that  Joseph  saw  Osnath,  the 
daughter  of  Potipherah,  a  pearl  among  the  beauties  of  the  land, 
and  he  loved  her,  and  she  became  his  wife.  —  Talmud. 


SERACH,    THE    FAIR    HARI'EP 

Joseph  commanded  them  to  be  careful  in  imparting  the  news 
they  carried  to  their  father,  lest  speaking  suddenly  it  might  have  a 
bad  effect  upon  so  old  a  man.  And  the  sons  of  Jacob  returned 
unto  the  land  of  Canaan  in  gladness  with  happy  hearts. 

And  it  came  to  pass  when  they  drew  near  to  Canaan  that  they 
said  one  to  the  other,  "  How  shall  we  break  this  news  unto  our 
father?  We  cannot  tell  him  sudddenly  that  Joseph  is  still  alive." 

But  it  chanced  when  they  reached  Beer-Shebah  that  Scrach,  the 
daughter  of  Asher,  came  to  meet  her  father  and  her  uncles.  And 
Scrach  was  a  sweet  singer,  and  she  played  upon  the  harp. 

So  they  said  unto  her,  "  Take  thy  harp,  and  go  and  sit  befoi\ 
our  father  and  play  to  him,  and  as  thou  playest,  sing  ;  sing  of  his 
son  Joseph,  and  let  him  k  ow  in  this  manner  that  Joseph  lives." 

And  the  maiden  did  as  she  was  bid,  and  sitting  before  her 
grandfather,  she  sang  to  him  a  song,  wherein  she  repeated  seven 
times  these  words  :  — 

"Lo,  Joseph  is  not  dead  ;  he  lives, 
My  uncle  rules  o'er  Egypt's  land.' 

And  Jacob  was  pleased  with  her  singing  and  playing  ;  happi 
ness  seemed  to  find  birth  in  his  heart  at  her  sweet  voice,  and  he 
smiled  upon  the  maiden  and  blessed  her.  And  while  he  was  talk 
ing  to  her  his  sons  arrived  with  their  horses  and  chariots,  and  Jacob 
arose  and  met  them  at  the  door,  and  they  said  to  him,  "  We  have 
joyful  tidings  for  our  father.  Joseph,  our  brother,  is  still  alive,  and 
he  is  ruler  over  all  the  land  of  Egypt."  —  Ibid. 


45°"  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

When  Judah's  fair  harper  enchantingly  spake 
Of  Joseph's  estate  to  the  patriarch  sire, 

She  bade  both  her  voice  and  her  skill  to  awake, 
And  sang  the  sweet  strain  to  the  sound  of  her  lyre. 

See  Israel  listen  !   PL's  heart  doth  revive, 

The  sight  of  the  wagons,  too,  gladdens  his  eye ; 

Divine  are  the  tidings  ;  ''Doth  Joseph  yet  live? 
I  will  go  down  and  see  him,"  he  saith,  "  ere  I  die.1' 

When  wisdom  and  beauty  unite  in  the  song, 
And  virtue  ennobles  the  heart-thrilling  strain, 

The  angels  themselves  might  the  measure  prolong, 
And  heaven  re-echo  the  golden  refrain. 


AN   APOCRYPHAL    BEAUTY— JUDITH. 

She  rose  where  she  had  fallen  down,  and  called  her  maid,  and 
went  down  into  the  house  in  which  she  abode  in  the  Sabbath-days, 
and  in  her  feast  days. 

And  she  pulled  off  the  garments  of  her  widowhood,  and  washed 
her  body  all  over  with  water,  and  anointed  herself  with  precious 
ointment,  and  braided  the  hair  of  her  head,  and  put  on  a  tire  upon 
it,  and  put  on  her  garments  of  gladness,  wherewith  she  was  clad 
during  the  life  of  Manasee  her  husband. 

And  she  took  sandals  upon  her  feet,  and  put  about  her  her 
bracelets,  and  her  chains,  and  her  ear-rings,  and  all  her  ornaments, 
and  decked  herself  bravely,  to  allure  the  eyes  of  all  men  that  should 
see  her. 

Then  there  was  a  concourse  throughout  all  the  camp :  for  her 
coming  was  noised  among  the  tents,  and  they  came  about  her  as 
she  stood  without  the  tent  of  Holoferness,  till  they  told  him  of  her. 

And  they  wondered  at  her  beauty,  and  admired  the  children  of 
Israel  because  of  her  ;  and  every  one  said  to  his  neighbor,  "  Who 


BEAUTIES.  457 

would  despise  this  people  that  have  among  them  such  women  ? 
Surely  it  is  not  good  that  one  man  of  them  be  left,  who,  being  let 
go,  might  deceive  the  whole  earth." 

And  they  that  lay  near  Holoferness  went  out,  and  all  his  ser 
vants,  and  they  brought  her  into  the  tent. 

Now,  Holoferness  rested  upon  his  bed,  under  a  canopy  which 
uas  woven  with  purple,  and  gold,  and  emeralds,  and  precious 
stones. 

So  they  shewed  him  of  her  ;  and  he  came  out  before  his  tent, 
with  silver  lamps  going  before  him. 

And  when  Judith  was  come  before  him  and  his  servants,  they 
all  marvelled  at  the  beauty  of  her  countenance  ;  and  she  fell  down 
upon  her  face,  and  did  reverence  unto  him  ;  and  his  servants  took 
her  up. 

And  Holoferness  took  great  delight  in  her,  and  drank  more 
wine  than  he  had  drunk  at  any  time  in  one  day  since  he  was  born. 
— ApocrypJia. 

A   SCRIPTURAL   BEAUTY — ESTHER. 

If  Asenath,  Joseph's  noble  bride,  was  the  pearl  of  Egypt,  truly 
Esther  was  the  lily  of  Sushan — which  name  itself  signifies  a  lily. 
She  is  called  both  Hadassah,  a  myrtle,  and  Esther  (from  Estera/t. 
Greek)  a  star  ;  and  was  "a  maid  fair  and  beautiful,"  whose  appear 
ance  at  court  was  as  if  a  new  star  had  arisen  upon  the  royal  hori 
zon,  "  and  the  keeper  of  women  preferred  her  and  her  maids  unto 
the  best  place  of  the  house  of  women." 

"  Her  pious  deeds,"  says  the  Talmud,  "  ceased  only  with  her 
life,  and  her  beauty  was  equalled  only  by  her  spiritual  qualities." 

Both  ever-green  myrtle  and  bright  beaming  star, 
Her  virginal  glory  decks  history's  pages  ; 

Mid  fragrance  and  beauty  she  shines  from  afar, 
The  pride  of  the  Hebrew  and  pearl  of  the  ages. 


45S  PROPOSAL   AND   ESPOUSAL. 

BEAUTY    IN    AGE. 

\ 

As  the  clear  light  is  upon  the  holy  candlestick,  so  is  the  beauty 
of  the  face  in  ripe  age. — Apociypha. 

"History  is  full  of  the  accounts  of  the  fascinations  of  women 
who  were  no  longer  young.  Thus  Pericles  wedded  Aspasia  when 
she  was  thirty-six,  and  yet  she  afterwards,  for  thirty  years  or  more, 
wielded  an  undiminished  reputation  for  beauty.  Cleopatra  was 
past  thirty  when  Anthony  fell  under  her  spell,  which  never  lessened 
until  her  death,  nearly  ten  years  later,  and  Livia  was  thirty-three 
when  she  won  the  heart  of  Augustus,  over  whom  she  maintained 
her  ascendancy  to  the  last.  Anne  of  Austria  was  thirty-eight  when 
she  was  described  as  the  handsomest  queen  of  Europe,  and  when 
Buckingham  and  Richelieu  were  her  jealous  admirers.  Ninon  dc 
1'Enclos,  the  most  celebrated  wit  and  beauty  of  her  day,  was  the 
idol  of  three  generations  of  the  golden  youth  of  France,  and  she  was 
seventy-two  when  the  Abbe  de  Bernis  fell  in  love  with  her.  Cath 
arine  of  Russia  was  thirty-three  when  she  seized  the  Empire  of 
Russia,  and  captivated  the  dashing  young  Gen.  Orloff  Up  to  the 
time  of  her  death  (at  sixty-seven)  she  seems  to  have  retained  the 
same  bewitching  powers,  for  the  lamentations  were  heartfelt  among 
all  those  who  had  ever  known  her  personally.  Madame  Mars  only 
attained  the  zenith  of  her  beauty  and  power  between  forty  and 
forty-five." 

"The  love  that  cheers  life's  latest  stage, 

Proof  against  sickness  and  old  age, 

Preserved  by  virtue  from  declension 

Becomes  not  weary  of  attention  ; 

But  lives,  when  that  exterior  grace 

Which  first  inspired  the  flame,  decays." 

The  hoary  head  is  a  crown  of  glory,  if  it  be  found  in  the  way  of 
righteousness. — Bible. 


3/Larriage  Etiquette. 


OR  whether  the  term  of  courtship  may  have  been  long 
or  short— according  to  the  requirements  of  the  case— 
the  time  will  at  last  arrive  for  fixing  the  day.  While 
it  is  the  gentleman's  province  to  press  for  the  earliest 
possible  opportunity,  it  is  the  lady's  privilege  to  name  the 
happy  day  ;  not  but  that  the  bridegroom-elect  must,  after 
all,  issue  the  fiat,  for  he  has  much  to  consider  and  prepare  for  be 
forehand  ;  for  instance,  to  settle  where  it  will  be  most  convenient  to 
spend  the  honeymoon — a  point  which  must  depend  on  the  season 
of  the  year,  on  his  own  vocation,  and  other  circumstances.  At  this 
advanced  state  of  affairs,  we  must  not  overlook  the  important  ques 
tion  of  the  bridal  trousseau  and  the  wedding  presents.  Wedding 
presents  must  be  sent  always  to  the  bride,  never  to  the  bridegroom, 
though  they  may  be  given  by  friends  of  the  latter.  They  should 
be  sent  during  the  week  previous  to  the  wedding  day,  as  it  is  cus 
tomary  to  display  them  before  the  ceremony. 

Two  cards  folded  in  the  invitation  in  the  envelope  are  sent  with 
the  wedding  invitation.  The  invitation  is  in  the  name  of  the  bride's 
mother,  or,  if  she  is  not  living,  the  relative  or  friend  nearest  the 

bride,  thus  : 

MRS.    NICHOLAS     RUTH 

AT     HOME, 
Tuesday,    Novejnber   i8th, 

FROM    II    TILL   2    O'CLOCK. 

No.  86  W.  47TH  STREET. 

461 


PROPOSAL  AND   ESPOUSAL. 

The  two  cards,  one  large  and  one  small,  are  folded  in  this  invi 
tation.  Upon  the  large  card  is  engraved  : 

MR.    AND    MRS.    W.    F.    JOHNSON 
On  the  smaller  one  : 

MISS    ROSSIE    RUTH. 

If  the  young  people  "  receive"  after  their  return  from  the  bridal 
tour,  and  there  is  no  wedding-day  reception,  the  following  card  is 
sent  out: 

MR.    AND    MRS.    W.    F.    JOHNSON 

AT     HOME, 
Thursday,    December   28tJi, 

FROM    II    TILL    2    O'CLOCK. 

No.  50  E.  63 RD  STREET. 

Or: 

MR.   AND    MRS.    \V.    F.   JOHNSON 

AT     HOME, 

Thursdays  in   December, 

FROM     I  I    TILL    2    O'CLOCK. 

No.  50  E.  63RD  STREET. 

The  bridal  calls  arc  not  expected  to  be  returned  until  the  last 
day  of  reception. 

The  bridegroom  gives  to  the  first  groomsman  the  control  ot  the 
ceremony  and  money  for  the  necessary  expenses.  The  first 
groomsman  presents  the  boquet  to  the  bride,  leads  the  visitors  up 
to  the  young  couple  for  the  words  of  congratulation,  gives  the 
clergyman  his  fee,  engages  the  carriages,  secures  tickets,  checks 


MARRIAGE  ETIQUETTE.  463 

>,  secures  pleasant  -eats,  if  the  happy  pair  start  by  rail  for 
the  "  moon  ;"  and,  in  short,  makes  all  arrangements. 

If  the  wedding  takes  place  in  the  church,  the  front  scats  in  the 
body  of  the  church  are  reserved  for  the  relatives  of  the  young 
couple.  The  bride  must  not  be  kept  waiting.  The  clergyman 
should  be  within  the  rails,  the  bridegroom  and  groomsmen  should 
be  in  the  vestry-room  by  the  time  the  bride  is  due  at  the  church. 
The  bridesmaids  should  receive  the  bride  in  the  vestibule. 

The  bridal  party  meet  in  the  vestry-room.  Then  the  bride, 
leaning  on  the  arm  of  her  father,  leads  the  procession  ;  the  bride 
groom,  with  the  bride's  mother  upon  his  arm,  follows  ;  the  grooms 
men  and  bridesmaids  in  couples  follow. 

At  the  altar  the  bridegroom  receives  the  bride,  and  the  ceremony 
begins.  The  groomsmen  stand  behind  the  bridegroom,  the  brides 
maids  behind  the  bride.  In  some  churches,  the  bride  and  bride 
groom  remove  the  right  hand  glove  ;  in  others  it  is  not  considered 
essential.  The  bride  stands  on  the  left  of  the  groom. 

When  the  wedding  takes  place  at  the  house  of  the  bride,  the 
bridal  party  is  grouped  behind  folding  doors  or  curtains  ere  their 
friends  see  them.  If,  however,  this  is  not  convenient,  they  enter  in 
the  same  order  as  in  the  church. 

The  first  bridesmaid  removes  the  bride's  left  hand  glove  for  the 
ring. 

After  the  ceremony  the  bride  and  groom  go  in  the  same  car 
riage  from  the  church  to  the  house,  or  from  the  house  to  the  railway 
depot  or  boat. 

The  bride  does  not  change  her  dress  until  she  assumes  her  trav 
elling  dress.  Her  wedding  gown  is  worn  at  the  breakfast. 

Friends  of  the  family  should  call  upon  the  mother  of  the  bride 
during  the  two  weeks  after  the  wedding. 

Mourning  must  not  be  worn  at  a  wedding.  Even  in  the  case 
of  a  widowed  mother  to  either  of  the  happy  pair,  it  is  customary  to 
-v^ar  sfrev,  or  some  neutral  tint 


464  PROPOSAL  AND   ESPOUSAL. 

It  is  no  longer  the  fashion  at  a  wedding  or  wedding  reception 
to  congratulate  the  bride  ;  it  is  the  bridegroom  who  receives  con 
gratulations  ;  the  bride,  wishes  for  her  future  happiness.  The  bride- 
is  spoken  to  first. 

The  day  being  fixed  for  the  wedding,  the  bride's  father 
now  presents  her  with  a  sum  of  money  for  her  trousseau,  according 
to  her  rank  in  life.  A  few  days  previously  to  the  wedding,  presents 
are  also  made  to  the  bride  by  relations  and  intimate  friends,  vary 
ing  in  amount  and  value  according  to  their  degrees  of  relationship 
and  friendship — such  as  plate,  furniture,  jewelery,  and  articles  of 
ornament,  as  well  as  utility,  to  the  newly-married  lady  in  her  future 
station.  These,  together  with  her  wedding  dresses,  etc.,  it  is  cus 
tomary  to  exhibit  to  the  intimate  friends  of  the  bride  a  day  or  two 
before  her  marriage. 

The  bridegroom-elect  has,  on  the  eve  of  matrimony,  no  little 
business  to  transact.  His  first  care  is  to  look,aftera  house  suitable 
for  his  future  home,  and  then,  assisted  by  the  taste  of  his  chosen 
helpmate,  to  take  steps  to  furnish  it  in  a  becoming  style.  He  must 
also,  if  engaged  in  business,  make  arrangements  for  a  month's  ab 
sence  ;  in  fact,  bring  together  all  matters  into  a  focus,  so  as  to  be 
readily  manageable  when,  after  the  honeymoon,  he  shall  take  the 
reins  himself.  He  will  do  well  to  burn  most  of  his  bachelor  letters, 
and  to  part  with,  it  may  be,  some  few  of  his  bachelor  connections  ; 
and  he  should  communicate,  in  an  easy,  informal  way,  to  his  ac 
quaintances  generally,  the  close  approach  of  so  important  a  change 
in  his  condition.  Not  to  do  this  might  hereafter  lead  to  inconven 
ience  and  cause  no  little  annoyance. 

It  is  the  gentleman's  business  to  buy  the  ring.  It  should  be,  we 
need  scarcely  say,  of  the  very  purest  gold,  but  substantial.  There 
are  three  reasons  for  this  :  first  thai  it  may  not  break  ;  secondly, 
that  it  may  not  slip  off  the  finger  without  being  missed  ;  and  third 
ly,  that  it  may  last  out  the  lifetime  of  the  loving  recipient,  even 
should  that  life  be  protracted  to  the  extreme  extent. 


^]  index. 


Abraham  and  Hagar 392 

Achsah,  Caleb's  daughter 257 

ADAM— 

Creation  of 229 

Double  of 236 

Impressions  on  seeing  Eve 29 

Ribs  of 233 

Story  of. 234 

Sleep  of. 231 

Trance  of 233 

Afghanistan,  Marriage  in 146 

Affection,  Pure  flame  of 29 

Age,  Beauty  in 458 

Age,  Coming  of. 202-205 

Alacrity,    the   lad's 34 

Alacrity,   Love's 30 

Albert,  Prince 55 

Alexander 199 

Alexandrian  Christians 282 

Alexis 177 

Alfonso 55 

Alone 159 

Antichrist 245 

Antipater 200 

Arab  Lady,  The 301 

Aristobulus 199 

Aristotle 72 

Armenian  Wedding * 268 

Asenath 457 

4G7 


468 

Aspasia 458 

Athenian  Laws 202-203 

Athenian  Virgins 281 

Autumn  Wedding  Styles 258 

BACHELORS— 

Amiable g^ 

Among  Antediluvians  none 88 

Advice  to • j  ^ 

Averse  to  Matrimony ' 76 

Beau gg 

Dry  Subject,  The '.'.'.'.'.'.'.  75 

Harp  out  of  tune,  The 79 

Less  serviceable  than  the  married  men 77 

Liberty  of. IO4 

Nature  Teaching  the 84 

Not  a  Family  Man 53 

Statistics  of g^ 

Surplus  of 50 

Taxing  the 80 

The  Wise 96 

Woes  of  the !  IO 

Bacon lgl 

Bears,  Domestic..  .  oc-> 

BEAUTV- 

Alluring  Nature  of 440 

American 41-4 

Apocryphal 456 

Catching  as  Fire 447 

Corrupting  Influence  of 447 

English 452 

Fascination  of AAC 

Gift  of  God,  The I...'.'.'.'.'.'.'.'.'.'.'.'.'.  442 

Hebrew  Children  of. 442 

Justice  blind-folded  against.  .  A-> 

Like  Wit '...'.'.'.'.'.'.  444 

Majesty  of. 444 

Mission  of. ^;  49-45 5 

Outward  form  of '       439 

Proverbs    concerning 442 

Requirements  of ^ 448 

Spark  of. 444 


INDEX. 

Scriptural 457 

Traditional 454 

Virtue  best  promoter  of 449 

Vanity  of. 445 

Worse  than  Wine 147 

Beulah 

Beginning,  God  the 

Beginnings,  Wrong,  of  Wedded  Life 

Belle,  The  Village 

Belles,  The  Karenn 

Benevolence  and  One  Leg 

BLUSHING— Arab  Lady's,  301  ;  Artificial,  301  ;  Bride  con 
cealing  the,  298  ;  Chastity's,  299  ;  Cheek  kindling  the, 
299  ;  Color  of,  301  ;  Conscious  Water,  302;  The  cream 
of  modesty,  300  ;  Of  swarthy  nations,  301  ;  Nature's 
alarm,  300;  None  in  Paradise,  301;  Philosophy  of,  298  ; 
of  holy  shame,  300  ;  Virtue's,  300  ;  Vice's.. . 

BETROTHAL — Athenian,  202  ;  American,  196;  Canadian, 
175;  Chinese,  196;  Consent  of  parents  required  in, 
205  ;  Death-bed,  185  ;  Early,  192  ;  English,  193  ; 
French,  194;  Grecian,  170;  Hindoo,  200  ;  Japanese, 
198  ;  Jewish,  180;  For  political  purposes,  199  ;  Spartan, 

Bridal  party 

BRIDE,  The,  237  ;  At  the  wedding,  463  ;  Bed  of  the,  219  ; 
Chamber  of  the,  242  ;  Chariot  of  the,  219  ;  Crier  sent 
for  the,  268  ;  Crown  of  the,  274  ;  Departure  of  the,  i8( 
269  ;  Divorce  seeking,  145  ;  Entrance  of  to  marri 
age  service,  314  ;  Jacob's,  30;  King's  daughter,  213- 
216  ;  Lifting  over  the  threshold  of  the,  272  ;  In  church, 
463  ;  Miser  and  the,  390 ;  Of  an  hour,  144  ;  Stubborn, 
248  ;  The  earth  a 

Bridesmaid 

BRIDEGROOM— Bride  prompting  the,  247  ;  Cabinet  Mil 
ter  the,  248  ;  Congratulating  the,   464  ;    Creeling  the, 
Eccentric,  246  ;  Heavenly,  212  ;  Pre-nuptial  duties  of, 
461  ;  Receiving  the  bride,  463  ;  Ridiculous,  248  ;  The 
sun  a 2°9 

Bridemen 

Brawn,  Fanny 

Burleigh,  Lord 

Caleb.. 257 


470  INDEX. 

Castor  and  Pollux  .  j  -q 

CELIBATE— Meaning  of,  85  ;  Ascetic,  103  ;  Famous,  102  ] 

Liberty  of  the IO4 

Celibates,  Advice  to '  "  ^9 

Celibacy  favorable  to  authorship I22 

Charlemagne j55 

Choice,  Bolingbroke's ^  I 

Chrysostom IO2 

Cleon ..  Hi 
CLERGYMAN — Blundering,  246 ;  Cannot  marry  himself, 

248  ;  Impostor,  249  ;  Marriage  of,  253  ;  Ritualistic 246 

Cobbet l66 

Compliment,  The  fair 5  r 

Complying  yet  denying j^O 

Contented  parents j^j 

Cooking ;,59-362 

Countess  de  Rochefort 148 

Courting  on  box  wood  rollers 173 

Courtship,  legal,  172  ;  Keeping  up  the 235 

Cromwell !^5 

Cuckoo,  Ode  to 91 

Cupid  with  wings igr 

DAUGHTERS,  124  ;  Abbess  of,  126  ;  Brown's,  129  ;  Caleb's, 
Charlemagne's,  166  ;  Cromwell's,  166  ;  How  dispose 
of,  128  ;  Landlord's,  97  ;  North  Carolina  farmer's,  144  ; 

No  relation  so  pure  as,  124  ;  Surpassing  qualities  of...  127 

Dove  and  Hawk's  feather 398 

Driver,  God  the 35 

DRlviNG^Evan's,  37  ;  Jehu's,  38  ;  Sammy  Hick's,  36  ; 
Methodist  pioneer's,  37  :  Spurgeon  on,  37  ;  Shunamitc 

woman's,  34  ;  Toplady  on 38 

Ecstacy,  Adam's 233 

Effect  effaced 67 

Elopement,  Beau  Brummel's 99 

Erasmus !  g 

Esther 457 

Etjquette  of  weddings 307 

Eunuch ....  88 

Eunuchs 95 

EYES — Blue,  25  ;  Black,  25  ;  Covenanting  with,  20  ;  Dove's 
21  ;  Drawing  the  spirits  into,  22  ;  Eloquence  of,  20  ; 


471 

Hieroglyphical  man's,  21;  Inlets  to  the  soul,  19; 
Keeping  clean  the,  22  ;  Lascivious,  19  ;  Light  of 
heaven  in  the,  24  ;  Looking  forward  with,  26  ;  Love's, 
22  ;  Magic-beaming,  25  ;  Man's  pre-eminence  in,  20  ; 
Nebuchadnezzar's,  21  ;  Serving  the  inward  light,  20  ; 
Spheres  of  beauty,  24  ;  Stars  of  night,  24  ;  Swift  glance 
of  the,  20  ;  Tenderest  part 20 

Fair  Jewess 33^ 

Fair  libelling 223 

Fair  Maidens 143 

Fall,  The 234 

Fanny,  Miss 44 

Figure,  Classic  requirements  of.  .  .  44$ 

Flutes,  Lydian 274 

Fop,  The ioi 

Giant  and  Dwarf. 4°5 

GlRLS — Italian,  40;  Butterflies,  196;  Chinese,  197  ;  Judge 

Ingersoll's,  140;  Mexican,  41  ;  Philadelphia  shop,  120; 

That  little,  204  ;  The  man  that  has  the   buggy's,  i  50  ; 

Why  don't  marry,  120:  Young 154 

GRAPES — Sour,  40.  The  sweetest  the  highest. .  .  40 

Groves,  Passion  of. 85 

Hadassah 457 

HAIR — Absalom's,  280.  Embroidered  forbidden,  278. 
Flaxen,  444.  How  parted,  278.  Long  not  seemly 
for  men,  279.  Nazarite's  nourishing  the,  276.  Plait 
ing  a  profession,  279.  Presented  at  marriage,  279. 
Samson's,  280.  Short  not  becoming  to  women...  279 

Head  winds I  59 

Heart  a  harp  out  of  tune 79 

Helpmeet 79 

^Hesitation 1 59 

*HOME — A  blessed  word,  109.     Building  the,  105.     French 

no  word  for 105 

Homeless .  107- 1 10 

HONEY — Eating  the,   340.       Celebrated,   340.       Dipping 

tongues  in  the,  340.      Reward  of  merit...  340 

Honeycomb,  Church's  lips  as 341 

HONEYMOON — Andamanase  spending  of,  341.  Continu 
ance  of,  340.  Origin  of,  341.  Pleasant  associations 
in  .  341 


472  INDEX. 

Hope  companion  of  youth 160 

Hope,  a  bright  messenger 243 

HUSBAND— Called  so  on  betrothal,  342.  Cooking  of,  359. 
Cooking  for,  360.  Head  of  the  house,  342.  Manag 
ing  of,  358.  Meaning  of. 342 

Husbands  and  wives,  342.     Mutual  duties  of. 344 

Hymeneus  and   Hymeneal 373 

Hymns  anc1  Hymens 3/3 

Hymcttus 34° 

Idolatries  of  love 63 

Inconstancy 161 

Indifference -.  .  .  3^7 

Iron   Egg .  293 

Jacob 33 

Judith...  456 

Karcnus,  The 17° 

Kissam,  M iss 432 

KISSING,  415.  Bible,  435.  Book  of  Law,  426.  Charity's 
431.  Child's,  421-426.  Church's,  430.  Clements,  431. 
Compounds  with.  432.  Convention's,  430.  Divine 
spouse's,  423.  Economy  in,  427.  Fairy,  435.  First 
Historic,  416.  Frenchman's,  422.  Homage  and,  420. 
Horses  and,  421.  Hypocritical,  431.  Jacob's,  417. 
Marriage  fee,  429.  Men  disliking,  418.  Millais'  pic 
ture  of,  421.  On  the  mouth,  421.  Peace,  431.  Poli 
tical,  429.  Promise,  425.  Oueen's,4i9-  Stolen,434. 
Threshold,  428.  Too  common,  417.  Traitor's,  431. 
Universal  custom  of,  432-434.  Various  kinds  of,  418. 
World  wide  custom  of. 4T  5 

Living,  Stylish H9 

LOVE — Alacrity  of,  30.  Always  in  season,  192.  Better 
than  gifts, '26.  Better  than  knowledge,  26.  Better 
than  Latin,  26.  Blind,  129.  Breath  of,  85.  Chariot 
eer,  a,  34-38.  Child  a,  385.  Comfort  of,  27.  Conju 
gal,  21.  Coyness  of,  39.  Dead,  388.  Died  to  prove 
his,  52.  Driving  of,  34-38.  Ecstasy  of,  29.  Essence 
of,  72.  Expulsive  power  of,  27.  False  lights  of,  66. 
First  dream  of,  44.  Flame  of,  29.  Giant,  3X5.  A 
giant  power,  28.  God  author  of,  20.  Good,  21.  Holy 
influence  of,  27-29.  Idolatries  of,  69.  Ill,  21.  Kin;;- 


INDEX.  473 

dom  of  contrasts  rules,  171.  Lilies  and,  62.  Love 
and,  47.  Man's  measure,  70.  Man's  weight,  70.  A 
marshall,  32.  Melody  of,  85.  Mission  of,  25.  The 
root  of  creation,  21.  Roses  and,  55-63.  Security 
lacking  of,  43.  Slighted,  385.  Soul  of,  85.  Spring 
of,  43,  Romantic  story  of,  41.  Subject  of  to  ague  fits, 
48.  Surviving  all  things  else,  29.  Telephone  and,  69. 
Wedded,  231,  235.  Woman's,  385.  Vagaries  of,  49- 
54.  Volume  of,  28.  Yoke  easy  of,  28.  Young 
dream  of 

LOVE-MAKING — All  men  original  in,  166-173.  Beasts, 
birds,  domestic  fowl  and  fish  in 

LOVERS — One-eyed,  66.     One-legged 

Madam  Bubble  and  Christian 

MAIDENS — 113.  Authors,  123.  Characteristic,  119.  Fam 
ous,  121.  Friendly  warning  to,  155.  Playing  the 
gridiron,  156.  Hermit  and  the,  116.  Increase  of,  i  15. 
Man  and  the,  182.  Modern,  157.  Spanish,  177. 

Song  of  the 

MISS— Meaning  of,  131.  Fanny,  44.  Elizabeth  Marriot, 
119.  Nigi  tingale,  131.  St.  Pierre 

MARRIAGE— An  aid  to  citizenship,  72.     Boat,  231.     Bond 
331.     Ancient,  333.     Classic  Bond,  141.     Virtue  best, 
232.       Divine,  212-220.       Dowry,   334.       Dowry   bill, 
334.       Eccentric,  250.       Equal  marry  thy,  141. 
love,  153.       Honorable,  225.       Honorable   in   Greece, 
223.     Incidental,  324.      Jewish  song,  335.      Life  sen 
tence  saved  by,  144.     Lottery,  146.       Mock,   326-32^ 
Playing  at,  325.     Provident  wisdom  in,  148.    Reasons 
trivial  for,  142-148.     Septuagenarian,  324.       Through 
a  dream,  323.    Wine  becoming  sour  in  the ;-.•'. 

MARRIAGE  CEREMONIES — Armenian,  268.  Druidical, 
315.  Grecian,  269.  Hindostanic,  266.  Jewish,  266. 
Moravian,  318.  Polish,  322.  Quaker,  318.  Rhodian 
268.  Tartar,  3 1 8.  Twice  performed  .... 

Match-maker  outwitted 

Match-making,  Royal 

Mathematical  chances 

Mathematical  colloquy... 

Matrimonial  market 

Melancthon,  Philip 


474 

Mercy's  decision  ......................  !  ^  t 

Mercy  and  Mr.  Brisk 


Moon,  Looking  at  the  .................................  40 

Moses  and  the  Ethiopian  woman  ......................  393 

Moth  and  candle  ....................................  398 

Mouse  and  lioness  ..................................  405 

Multitude  mixed  ....................................  392 

Nicanor  .............................................  ^3 

Nightingale  and  love  ................................  64 

Nightingale,   Miss  ....................................  !3! 

Nightingales  and  cuckoo...  oi 

Nod  ................................  *8 

"No,"  Saying...                                                    .............  i;5 

OIL  —  Annointing  with,  272.     Perfumed,   172.       Wine  and  272 

Olivia.,  I48 

Pairing  season  ......................................  3  1 

Parent's  consent  required  ............................  205 

Patience,  Value  of.  ..................................  3-5 

Payne,  John  Howard  ............................  IO8 

''' 


.........  77 

Pots,  Earthen  and  iron  ...............................          405 

Poverty,  Contented  ....................................          ^ 

PROPOSAL—  165.  Answer  to,  170.  Grimm's,  168.  In 
dian's,  17.  Jock's,  168.  Karenn's,  168.  Refusal  of 
175.  Scotch  Beadle's,  168.  Siberian's,  171.  Steele's 
167.  Too  bashful  for,  173.  Westerner's,  254.  White- 
field's,  167.  Women  permitted  to,  176.  Why  women 
are  not  permitted  to,  176.  Women  not  allowed  to, 
Unique,  172.  Yes  or  No  .........................  173 

QUARRELS—  Domestic,  353.      Foolish,  353.      Queen  Mer 

cedes  and  Infante  Jaime,  382.   Pleasant  .............          353 

Rachel  .............................................  ^3 

Raleigh,  Sir  Walter  ..................................  !  ^2 

Ribs,  Number  of  .................................  233 

Rich  woman  ........................................  !  4  ! 

Rich  and  poor  ......................................  j  ^  ! 

Riding,  Slack  not  thy  ................................  34 


INDEX.  475 

RINGS — Alexander's,  285.  Buying-  the,  464.  Mathemati 
cal  colloquy  on  the,  284.  Corcud's,  297.  Charlemagne 
and  the,  284.  Design  of,  282.  Death,  289.  Engage 
ment,  spurious,  287.  Evening,  291.  How  the  hand 
went  through  a,  284.  Glove  removed  for,  464.  Lionc's 
dame's,  297.  Lost,  293.  Newton's  dream,  287.  Not 
to  be  forced,  283.  Posies,  295.  Prince  and  the,  273. 
Queen  Caroline's,  286.  Royal  love,  290.  Significance 
of  the,  286.  Test,  289.  Thrift,  292.  Virgin's  297. 
Virtue's,  217.  Ancient  wedding,  292.  Weekly,  291. 
Why  placed  on  the  left  hand 183 

ROSES — Bitterest,  63.  Death  and  the,  57.  Fairest,  63. 
Fate  and  the,  57.  Joy's,  60.  Lady  and  the,  57.  Love 
and  the,  55.  Men  must  gather  the,  77.  Plucked,  60. 
Red,  55.  Sharon's,  61.  Three,  55.  Tomb  and  the...  58 

Samson  and  Delilah 374 

Season,  Pairing 3 l 

Scrach 455 

SHOE — Bride's,  338.    Bridegroom's,  338.    Eastern  widow's, 

339.     Where  pinches 339 

Sleep,  Adam's 

Slip  betwixt  cup  and  lip 

SPINSTERS — Meaning  of,  114.       Famous,    121.       Increase 

of H5 

Steele,  Richard 167 

St.  Paul 102 

Taileth,  The 

Taxing  bachelors 80 

Tempter,  Incarnate 72 

TJiali 266 

Themistocles  and  daughter H2 

Thistle  and  cedar 372 

Thackwaite,  Miss 25° 

Vice  a  deformity 45° 

Vice  darkens  the  countenance 449 

Virgins  in  harness 1 32 

Virtue  before  riches I42 

Virtue  brightening  the  face 449 

Virtue  a  rejuvenator 45 J 


4/6  INDF.X. 

Walpole,  Horace Q, 

Walpoliana ^ 

Wandering,  Place  of. 73 

Waywardness,  Human I2g 

Weather 

WEDDED— Devotion,  235.       Harmony,   236.       Love,  236. 

Oneness 

WEDDINGS— Blessing  cup  at,  309.  Characteristic,  314. 
Brooklyn,  252.  Druidical,  315.  Cards  of,  461.  Gypsy, 
Indian,  318.  Moravian,  316.  Palmer-Nevada,  314. 
Polish,  322.  Quaker,  316.  Tartary,  317.  Through 
a  dream,  323.  When  three  Sundays  came  together, 
320.  Cheer,  302-397.  Christ  at  the,  307.  Doorposts 
anointed  at  the,  271.  Expensive,  273.  Festivities  of 
the,  273-275.  Garment,  243.  Man  without,  243.  Gods 
propitiated  at,  280.  Governor  of  the,  307.  Great 
personages  at  the,  319.  Horseback,  241.  Iceberg, 
54.  Mammoth  Cave,  239.  Mock,  326.  Playing  at 
325.  Platform.  251.  Presents  at  the,  257.  Shoe/337. 

Virgin  at  the,  311.     Wine  at  the ;  .  ^O2 

Wedlok,  Advantages  of...  T  Tn 

Wedlok,  Key  of ]'.'.'.'.'.'.'.'.'. 

Well  and  Weasel Tv>7 

\Vhitefield '..'.'.'.'.'.'.'.'.'.'.'.'.'.'.  167 

Witness  Galead j  c>j 

WIFE— A  better  half.  235.  Best  helper,  230.  Choosing  a 
139.  Classic  choice  of  a,  145.  Cobbct's,  1 66.  Dorian's, 
343.  Goldsmith's,  148.  Good,  153.  Good  thing,  343. 
Grace  of  a,  222.  Half  sister  a,  364.  Home,  342. 
Husband's  name  taking  the,  229.  Ionian's,  343. 
Little,  226.  Man's  best  part,  222.  Pope's  defence  of, 

23.     Prudent,  343,    Sister  the,  363.     Weaver  the...  .          342 
WOMAN — Sooner  marriageable  than  man,  203.      Glory  of 
man  the,  77.       Lot  of,  386.       Love  of,  386.       Strong- 
minded,  123.   Virtuous,  77.     Wayward J2£ 

YOKE,  EQUAL— The,  382.     Becoming  unequal 37^ 

YOKE,  UNEQUAL,  369.  Affection  unrequited  in  the,  384. 
Balak's  stumbling  block  and  the,  393.  Birds,  beasts, 
and  insects  avoiding  the,  373.  Business  and  the,  371. 
Cain's  marriage  and  the,  400  Cainitcs,  Sethites  and 
the,  377.  Crowns  bowing  to  the,  381.  Forbidden, 


INDEX.  477 

370.  Grecian  Law  respecting  the,  377.  Kings 
guarding  against  the,  397.  Knox  and  the,  397. 
Princess  of  Meriningen  and  the,  382.  Sin  the  devil's 

405.     Sundry  alliances  under  the 392 

Yoke,  Unhallowed 409-412 

YOUTH — Advice  to,    19.       Age  and   the,   389.       Ancient 

proverbs  for,  98.     Buoyancy  of,  1 60.     Morning  of... ..          160 

Xantippe 

Zeno 

Zion,  Daughter  of. 

Zipporah 

Zone,  Maiden's 

Zorobabel 4»9 


And,  ah  !  forgive  a  stranger  rude 1 16 

Alas  for  human  fate 262 

A  blushing  cheek  speaks  modest  mind 300 

A  holy  dervise  once  a  crystal  cup 349 

Alexis  calls  me  cruel 177 

A  lily  cup  was  growing 62 

And  this  shonld  be  the  bridal  day 264 

Arrayed  in  glittering  white 212 

Averse  to  all  the  troubles  of  a  wife 76 

A  wife's  a  man's  best  piece 223 

Believe  me  if  all 46 

Bright  is  the  froth  of  an  Eastern  wave 44 

But  this  the  rugged  savage 106 

Cleon  hath  a  million  acres 141 

Dearest,  sweetest,  fondest,  best 208 

Deep  down  in  the  slush 293 

Do  shadows  of  the  days 272 

Do  you  ever  play 356 

Dost  thou  idly  ask 192 

Few  have  learnt  to  speak 178 

Gallant  and  tall 53 

478 


INDEX.  479 

He  sleeps  on  her  knees 280 

He  was  a  robust  man 1 33 

His  heart  is  a  harp  out  of  tune 79 

Home,  how  that  blessed  word IO9 

Husbands  and  wives 

I  breathe  in  the  face 

I'd  like  a  wife 226 

I  dreamed  I  saw 4° 

I  saw  them  through  the  churchyard  go 39 l 

I  see  a  spirit 

Look  on  the  placid  water 1 20 

Love's  eyes  are  dove's  eyes 

Love  like  the  nightingale 65 

Love  me,  love,  but 39 

Magic,  wonder-beaming  eye 

Man's  other  helpers  come  and  go 

Marriage  is  born  of  the  skies 221 

Miss  Fanny  in  a  dream 44 

My  bonds  are  fast 5^ 

My  muse  in  pleasant  mood 422 

O,  eyes  which  do  the  spheres 24 

O,  leave  the  gay  round  of  thy  pleasure 39$ 

On  me  he  shall  ne'er  put  a  ring 284 

O,  pleasant  is  beauty 44 

On  the  tramp  with  a  bag  on  my  back 162 

O,  ye  companions,  list  to  me 213 

Pray  call  me  a  pretty  name 1 56 

Pure,  sweet,  serene 24 

Save  your  kisses  for  your  husband 428 

Shall  things  that  creep,  mope,  sing  or  fly 87 

She  plucked  a  rose  and  idly  pulled 60 

She  sits  in  an  elegant  parlor 157 


4 SO  INDEX 

She  standeth  blushing  by  his  side 237 

So  goes  the  world j  r  l 

Some  wicked  wits  have  libelled  all  the  fair 223 

Sweet  and  solemn  fall  the  accents 187 

Sweet  girl  you  know 249 

Take  root  somewhere IO* 

The  city  swarms  intense IOi 

The  glancing  blade IO^ 

The  lane,  the  lane,  the  winding  lane 88 

The  primal  duties  shine !^2 

The  red  rose  says,  "  Be  sweet," 56 

The  senses  God  has  given 10 

The  shepherd  came  down  from  the  creffel  steep 353 

The  tomb  said  to  the  rose  above 58 

There  is  a  love  that  only  lives 47 

There  was  a  time,  fond  girl,  when  you 45 

They  have  no  wine,  she  said 303 

They  say  the  brunettes  are  arch  coquettes 146 

Thou  gorgeous,  glittering  thing 39 ! 

Two  travellers  started  on  a  tour 406 

We  are  face  to  face,  and  between  us  here 388 

Whate'er  may  chance  us  on  the  way ^4 

When  first  the  soul  of  love 85 

When  age  weddeth  age  why  should  we  complain 324 

When  loving  meets  loathing,  aversion,  desire 387 

When  maiden  blushes  could  make  no  pretence 276 

When  the  fugitive  Cain  from  the  presence  of  God 404 

Why  should  I  blush 299 

Wilt  thou  go  with  this  man j  88 

Work  is  with  enjoyment  rife !  28 

Would  you  find  the  fairest  flower 61